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FREE EVERY MONDAY DECEMBER 10>16 2012

ART & CULTURE COMEDY FILM FOOD & DRINK MUSIC SHOPPING SMALL SCREEN THEATRE

THE BEST CHRISTMAS

Bars & Boozers

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4 Scouted Secret Cash Machines, Last Chance London and much more 6 Talent Scout Super Best Friends Club singer and keys player Jonah Brody takes us through his favourite London hotspots

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Cover: YuryZap / Megan Sheehan, THE Noun Project

8 Christmas drinking Christmas is the time for making merry with friends and family – but with so many drinking spots to choose from, where should you go? We pick the best

The Big Picture

December invasion Of the alien – rather than family – kind in Jeff Wayne’s War of the Worlds 17

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Cut-price cheer in the new year Pretty green West End classic Wicked

Making the ghost of it Spooky play The Woman In Black

A glorious feeling Acclaimed new musical Singin’ in the Rain

//Secret Cash/////////////////// Machines of London///////// CHARING CROSS /////////////////

Beat the January blues by bagging yourself some dirt cheap theatre tickets January is a tough month. It’s always a long limp to payday, the last of the Christmas balloons resemble something more akin to raisins, and suddenly the summer seems an awfully long way away. To cheer you up, cut-price theatre is coming to the rescue. Theatres all over the capital are offering cheap deals as part of Get Into London Theatre, the annual ticket scheme that allows the public to see some of the best shows in the capital for a fraction of the normal cost. More than 50 major shows, including musicals, ballet, comedy and drama, are offering tickets for as little as £10. Among the participating productions are Wicked, Mamma Mia! and One Man, Two Guvnors, which line-up alongside newcomers Loserville, Goodnight Mister Tom and Scrooge The

Avoid the cash machines on the station concourse – there are always queues and more often than not, one of them is out of service. The secret is to head to the passageway to the Strand, which is flanked by Marks & Spencer and Whistlestop. There stands a solitary Barclays ATM that few seem to notice. Do you know a secret cash machine? Let us know on Twitter @ScoutLondon #secretcashmachines

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Musical. Fans of opera and dance can enjoy Matthew Bourne’s Sleeping Beauty, Midnight Tango and The Mikado, and there are lots of family-friendly shows also taking part, including Room On The Broom, Sooty in Space and seasonal favourite The Snowman. There are a limited number of cheap passes and the offer is always very popular, so it’s advisable to get in early. Tickets go on sale on December 11, for shows running between January 1 and February 15. Whether you’re planning to scare yourself into a good mood with The Woman in Black, or prefer to cheer yourself up with comedy from The Boy With Tape on his Face, the New Year Blues suddenly don’t seem so daunting. getintolondontheatre.co.uk 0844 412 2703

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Kraftwerk announce Tate Modern dates Tate Modern’s Turbine Hall has lived through many drastically different incarnations in its 12 year life-span. But it has not yet served as a concert venue – until now. Kraftwerk, the German godfathers of electronic music, have been booked to play eight shows in the cavernous space that once housed the electricity generators of the former power station. Billed as Kraftwerk – The Catalogue 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8, the series of gigs will showcase each of the band’s eight albums – one per night, starting with 1974’s Autobahn on February 6 and

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finishing with 2003’s Tour de France on February 14. Alongside the performances will be a variety of 3D visual displays that pay tribute to the band’s 40 year career of technological innovation. Kraftwerk are notoriously reclusive and these will be their first London shows since 2004, so tickets are expected to sell out extremely fast. They go on sale at 7.30am on December 12, priced £60. Kraftwerk – The Catalogue 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8, Tate Modern, February 6-14, tate.org.uk/kraftwerk

LONDON Comics, Manga & Co: The New Culture Of German Comics Goethe-Institut Closes Sat Dec 15 Damned by Despair National Theatre Closes Thurs Dec 13 Ignorance/Jahiliyyah Hampstead Theatre Closes Sat Dec 15 Jennifer Talbot: Assemble Vyner Street Gallery Closes Sun Dec 16 Love’s Comedy Orange Tree Theatre Closes Sat Dec 15 Sacred Ink: The Tattoo Master Brunei Gallery, SOAS Closes Sat Dec 15 Together With Music Brasserie Zedel Closes Sat Dec 15

Allies the invisable & Morrison dot

that show London through the 20th century, and others that focus on the history of the Tube itself – starting what is sure to be a litany of commemorative activities for the network’s 150th birthday in 2013. Among the films that will play on the screen between now and March are Anthony Asquith’s 1928 film Underground, and London – The Modern Babylon, Julien Temple’s inspiring documentary hymn to the city, made earlier this year.

Underground film

the pen isn’t always mightier than the sword

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If you’ve passed through Canary Wharf Tube in the last year or so, chances are you’ll have seen the large cinema screen that has been installed in the station’s booking hall. The imaginatively-named Canary Wharf Screen will be coming down in March next year, leaving time for one final season of films. Going out on a highbrow bang, the Art on the Underground project will screen a series of films from the enormous BFI archive, including some

Wayne Gooderham: The Secret History of Second-Hand Books Foyles, Charing Cross Road Closes Thurs Dec 13

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Jonah Brody musician

Let’s go for a drink – Scout’s buying. Where shall we go? There’s a nice quiet place called

Scout London Cover Stars 0020 Kay Vincent, 32 Print Designer, East Dulwich

The Salisbury in Harringay that has good ales, booths, lots of space, but also has a transvestite house band. A real big-bellied sort of drag queen look. For the sheer incongruity and the ales I’d go there. Sounds highly entertaining. How about somewhere to eat? Jai Krishna on Stroud Green Road. It has tasty, super cheap vegetarian Indian food. Where’s your favourite outdoor spot? Hampstead Heath. In particular the men’s bathing ponds. The whole

What in London inspires you? Markets, screen printing and scooting squirrels. Any London secrets to share? The tucked-away Brixton market is my favourite place. I love the quirky vintage/retro shops, galleries and live music. Although I’ve often been there, there are still so many amazing foodie places left to try. It is like being on holiday but only 15 minutes away on the bus.

park has so many memories. It’s such a lifeboat for many people stuck in the grind. What’s a great cultural experience you’ve had in London recently? I recently did a gig for Secret Cinema’s latest event. It involved being stripped naked, deported to a prison, locked in cells and then allowed to roam around a vast set. It was filled with actors and all based around the Shawshank Redemption. An amazing, overwhelming, slightly uncomfortable experience.

What’s your favourite part of London? I love having a rummage at Columbia Road flower market. The hustle and bustle, and cockney banter of the stallholders is always a happy start to my Sunday morning. How important is London in your work? Very. The city has a wonderful bunch of amazing, talented artists

What’s your favourite venue? I love the Green Note in Camden, Hootananny in Brixton and The Birds Nest in Deptford. All of them are filled with people who care about the music, about the vibe and are sort of lost souls. What’s your secret London tip for Londoners? 5Rhythms at St Peter’s Church in Vauxhall on a Thursday. Ecstatic dance and body knowledge. Super Best Friends Club release their self-titled debut album on January 28

and designers, and inspiration is everywhere. There is never a dull moment and you can never get bored! What’s next for you? I’ll be illustrating a children’s book – it’s an animal alphabet book created in collaboration with Noodoll. See more at: ketchuponeverything.co.uk

Hey there, are you a talented creative? Fancy decorating the Scout London logo that appears on our cover each week? We welcome London-based artists, designers, illustrators, photographers. Get in touch: talent@scoutlondon.com 6

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Jonah Brody (pictured centre) is the vocalist and keys player in joyful psychedelic alternative pop rock six-piece Super Best Friends Club. The band also includes Mercurynominated Josh Green, filmmaker Jordan Copeland and former Soccer96 drummer Max Hallett. Already booked to appear at next year’s Wilderness, Secret Garden Party and Shambala festivals, they have been getting a lot of love from the likes of BBC 6Music of late.

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Heading to the pub to toast the festive season with your friends and family is as much a part of Christmas as carols and crackers. But in a city packed with watering holes, where’s best to drink your way into the Christmas spirit? Scout London Food Editor Ben Norum rounds up the boozers and bars where you’ll enjoy the merriest of Christmases

t could easily be argued that no city in the world has contributed so much to the way we celebrate Christmas today as London has. It was South Kensington inventor Sir Henry Cole who was responsible for Christmas cards, and City solicitor William Sandys who published the first collection of Christmas carols. The Christmas cracker was created by Clerkenwell sweet shop owner Thomas J

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Smith, who filled them with his own bon bons in place of the toys we are used to today. And Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol – set in London – brought with it numerous traditions, including eating turkey for Christmas dinner. More than anything else, it was the Victorians who took the declining midwinter festival and turned it into the excuse for feasting, boozing and general merriment that it is today. Nowadays, London is keeping up the good work, with no shortage of places to eat and, more specifically, drink the season away. Here’s our toast to the best of them.

Escape the weather – and the crowds Shoppers on Oxford Street

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Oxford Street is Europe’s busiest shopping street and home to one of the most iconic displays of Christmas lights in the world. As great as that is, pushing through the crowds and increasingly cranky, panicked shoppers is enough to drive anyone to drink. And after all that, the last thing you want is to face yet more crowds when you get to the bar. Sam Smiths pubs are the drinking dens of choice for many an in-the-know Londoner. They’re often housed in former Victorian gin palaces and impressively decked-out with elaborate glasswork that segregates different bar sections (once used to separate the sexes and the classes). Some of them remain undiscovered by the masses and are therefore a good choice for a pint without the palaver. Try The Glasshouse Stores (Brewer Street, W1F 9UL) close to Piccadilly Circus, The Red Lion (Kingly Street, W1B 5PR) around the corner from Carnaby Street, The Cock Tavern (Great Portland Street, W1W 8QE) just north of Oxford Street, or

Westfield White City Leave the bustle behind and head out of the shopping centre, over to The Defector’s Weld (Uxbridge Road, W12 8AA) where you can enjoy craft beers, an open fire and a little breathing space.

The Angel (St Giles High Street, WC2H 8LE) near Covent Garden market. For a classy tipple and views to match, seek solace in Paramount Bar (New Oxford Street, WC1A 1DD) at the top of Centre Point, and watch London bustle below you. If you don’t go up, going down is another good trick for avoiding the hordes. The charming downstairs lair that is Bradley’s Spanish Bar (Hanway Street, W1T 1UT) is as fun for an afternoon Sangria as it is in the wee hours when just about everywhere else nearby is closed. Antidote Wine Bar (Newburgh Street, W1F 7RR) off Carnaby Street is appropriately named, offering a soothing selection of natural and biodynamic wines that will transport you to rural France and away from urban French Connection. Once you’ve finished splashing the cash on Bond Street, you’re best heading into Marylebone if you want somewhere a little quieter.

One New Change Grab a glass of fizz at the top floor Searcys Champagne Bar (EC4M 9AF) and enjoy magical views. Or go around the corner to compact City boozer The Cockpit (St Andrew’s Hill, EC4V 5BY).

The Pontefract Castle (Wigmore Street, W1U 1QB) is a proper pub that also has a back bar full of whisky should you require perking up, and at tucked-away speakeasy bar Purl (Blandford Street, W1U 7HX), there are cocktails galore.

Westfield Stratford City Head to Tap East (International Square, E20 1EE), hidden away among the big brands, to discover a micro-brewery with a mega selection of beers. There are 17 on tap and well over 100 in bottles.

Boxpark Shoreditch Got your hipster labels? Now get a drink from the BrewDog bar (Bethnal Green Road, E1 6LA). Ask about the downstairs space to be let in on a secret (hint: there are cocktails involved). scoutlondon.com Scout London

AT THE GR EAT PU BS TH AT AR E OP EN

ON CH RI ST MA S DAY

Clissold Arms, Muswell Hill, N2 9HR Special Christmas lunch menu. The Dove, Hackney, E8 4QJ Open for lunch on Broadway Market. The Flask, Hampstead, NW3 1HE Open noon-4pm and serving food. Good for walks on the heath. The Founders Arms, Southbank, SE1 9JH Open noon-5pm and serving food by the river. Hope, Wandsworth, SW17 7EG A special lunch menu, located right by the common. The Nightingale, Balham, SW12 8NX Business as usual, open until midnight.

Orange Public House & Hotel, Chelsea, SW1W 8NE Champagne Christmas menu, just off King’s Road. The Grange, Ealing, W5 3XH A big wine list and special menu, open until 3pm.

The Trinity Arms, Brixton, SW9 Proper locals’ pub, open until 3pm (pictured above).

Find festive cheer

The Queen’s Pub & Dining Room, Crouch End, N8 9DE Open all day and serving a special food menu. The Ship, Wandsworth, SW18 1TB Open until 4pm with a full lunch menu. The Spread Eagle, Camden, NW1 7NB Open noon-4pm and serving food.

Midnight Mass Lubricate your vocal cords in a cozy central pub before singing your heart out at a Midnight Mass service at one of the capital’s most iconic churches

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St Martin-in-the-Fields Church No longer in the fields but in the heart of London, just by Trafalgar Square, this large church dates from as far back as 1222 and is an example of classic Georgian architecture. Call into The Crypt for a Christmas dinner and mince pies beforehand, or warm up your vocal cords at The Lamb & Flag (WC2E 9EB), which occupies a building dating back to Tudor times and is a contender for the title of London’s oldest pub.

PC OP-UP RACK ERS

Reinaldo Weber, The Noun Project

THE BEST S EASONAL SP ECIALS AT LONDON BARS AND RESTAU RANTS

Vista at The Trafalgar, Spring Gardens, SW1A 2TS Following a summer season of heady views, the seasonal bar atop the Trafalgar Hotel has re-opened for the festive season, this time with full cover and heating. A large Champagne menu is accompanied by warming winter cocktails.

Buon Natale at Bunga Bunga, Battersea Bridge Road, SW11 3BA This ever-eccentric homage to Berlusconi has gone suitably overboard with the decorations this year. Enjoy bubbling sharer cocktails dressed-up as Christmas trees, or opt for a glass of Inverno a Napoli, Italy’s fiery version of traditional mulled wine.

St Paul’s Cathedral One of the most famous cathedrals in the world, it’s hard to think of a grander venue in which to welcome Christmas. Get in the spirit beforehand with a glass of vino at Corney & Barrow (EC4M 7DY) in Paternoster Square (pictured left), or head up to Chiswell Street Dining Rooms (EC1Y 4SA) for a proper feed and Christmassy cocktails such as Chiswell 56, which uses homemade sloe gin, blueberries and champagne.

Piste at Archer Street, Soho, W1D 7AP This new winter-time après-ski themed bar-within-a-bar offers warming cocktails, such as the signature Apricot and Cinnamon Bellini, plus the rather novel all-singing bar team who spread the Christmas cheer with renditions of carols and pop songs.

Whamtastic Christmas at Maggie’s, Fulham Road, SW10 9QL Of all the unlikely Christmas bar events, this West London club has decided to dedicate the 2012 festive season to Wham! and their Christmas No.1, Last Christmas. Highlights include cocktails served in Wham! mugs and a mistletoe be-decked Wham! Booth.

The Pale Blue Door Christmas Feast, Dalston, E8 Back where it all started – in a secret Dalston location, following spin-off events around the world – this month-long special offers up a macabre, alternative Christmas. The exact location and details are, as ever, a secret.

Westminster Abbey A venue well known but little visited by Londoners, here you can welcome in Christmas with one of the city’s finest boys’ choirs, as well as the chimes of nearby Big Ben. You’re advised to arrive early to get a seat, but if you’ve got time a visit to The Speaker (SW1P 2HA) on Great Peter Street is always a good way to spend it. This old fashioned pub doesn’t play music or have a TV screen, but boasts a buzzy, friendly atmosphere.

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The award-winning surreal stand-up comedian returns! ‘He is quite brilliant at what he does… you will enjoy yourself in ways you never thought possible.’

««««« Scotsman ‘A fantastically funny hour of lunacy… little short of perfect.’

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SAM SIMMONS: ABOUT THE WEATHER Until Sat 5 Jan

TICKETS FROM £10 020 7478 0100 SOHOTHEATRE.COM

THE

e v i t Fes S T FINE

Special dedication to trees The Abbeville, Clapham, SW4 9JW Buy your tree at the pub.

Best smelling puB

Best seasonal snacks

The Ship, Kennington, SE11 6SF If saunas used mulled wine...

Upstairs at Rules, Covent Garden, WC2E 7LB Stilton and a biscuit with your Port?

Most tinseltastic venue

Most festive fireside

The Old Swan, Notting Hill, W8 4DP Tacky and they know it.

The Holly Bush, Hampstead, NW3 4RL Village charm and a coaly scent.

Recipe

EWAN-M / herrylawford / Okan Benn, the Noun Project

something to mull over No drink says Christmas quite like mulled wine, and there’s no shortage of the stuff to be found in pubs and bars around London. But wine isn’t all that can be mulled. Notting Hill’s The Portobello Gold (Portobello Road, W11 2QB), Chelsea’s open-fired The Jam Tree (King’s Road, SW6 2EB) and The Green Man (Riding House Street, W1W 7EP) in Fitzrovia are just a few pubs which serve an exemplary mulled cider, while it can also be bought direct from the New Forest Cider Company

at Borough Market. Just around the corner, cosy pub The Rake (Winchester Walk, SE1 9AG) ladles out mulled porter for a beer with a difference. At The Hide (Bermondsey Street, SE1 3XF), mulled wine is accompanied by hot cocktails including the Tom & Jerry, which blends warm milk with Jamaican rum. The Flask (Flask Walk, NW3 1HE) in Hampstead has a changing selection of mulled goods, while the Boisdale restaurants are good for a hot toddy made with just about any whisky you fancy.

Master chocolatier Paul A Young’s Mulled Wine Hot Chocolate Place 500ml water, 400g golden caster sugar, 200g cocoa powder, 2 cinnamon sticks, 5 star anise and 8 cloves in a pan and bring to a simmer. Remove from the heat, add 500g dark chocolate and mix well until the chocolate is fully blended in. Add 2 halved clementines and a sprig of rosemary and leave to infuse for about 10 minutes. Add 1 bottle of fruity red wine and warm through gently when ready to serve. Serve warm, but not hot. scoutlondon.com Scout London 13

Where to head for... Couples’ cocktails

B O Y S ON THE TO W N

From Mayfair hotels to Soho basements, London’s never been more awash with sexy bars for drinks with your loved one. The Sushisamba (EC2N 4AY) terrace on the 42nd floor of the Heron Tower in the City is as visually stimulating as they come, while low-lit Nightjar (City Road, EC1V 1JB) near Old Street feels temptingly salubrious with its nooks and crannies. Artesian Bar (Portland Place, W1B 1JA) in

If there are festive beers to be downed, there are few places more fitting than The Bavarian Beerhouse (City Road, EC1V 2QH). Big glasses, small prices and busty wenches will keep the lads happy, and there’s no need to worry about things getting a bit loud and raucous – that’s the point. For those looking for a more connoisseurdriven approach to beer, a visit to one of the Draft House pubs (in Battersea, Clapham, Tower

The Langham Hotel is a luxurious post-shopping treat and has been awarded the title of Best Bar in the World countless times.

Hill, Lordship Lane and Goodge Street) is a good choice, where there are also plenty of meaty snacks to soak up the booze.

Girls night out

Drinks with the family

A girly night out needn’t mean heading to one of the West End’s tourist trap clubs. Instead, take your BFFs through the fridge door and into the ‘secret’ Mayor of Scaredy Cat Town bar (Artillery Lane, E1 7LS) at Shoreditch’s Breakfast Club, where you’ll find fun cocktails and cheesy music, though sadly not much space for dancing. Further south, Cubana (Lower Marsh, SE1 7RG) at Waterloo has a bit more space, funky

Keeping everyone happy on a night out drinking is hard enough with any group of people, let alone the family. Our tip is to head to Mark’s Bar (Brewer Street, W1F 9UP) beneath Hix in Soho. It’s a cool option that is comfortable and not too crowded, with a wide drinks selection and music that’s not so loud you can’t hear each other speak. Alternatively, for drinks with a difference, hop aboard The Hispaniola (Victoria

Cuban beats to shake your tail to and pitchers of surprisingly decent cocktails. Christmas – Caribbean style!

Embankment, WC2N 5DJ), now semi-permanently moored near Embankment station, for riverside views.

Lose the booze

1. Dishoom Twists on tea punches and lassis are good non-alcoholic options at this anglo-Indian cafe in Covent Garden and Shoreditch. dishoom.com 14 Scout London scoutlondon.com

2. Hawksmoor Cornflake milkshakes and apple mojitos are among the booze-free cocktails on the menu at the Hawksmoor restaurants. thehawksmoor.com

3. London Cocktail Club Just choose from sweet, sharp, creamy, fruity, tall or martini and the maestros behind the bar will do the rest. londoncocktailclub.co.uk

jason lowe

Christmas without alcohol may be a foreign concept to many of us, but whether you’re abstaining, driving, pregnant, or just giving your liver a well-earned break, it’s good to know where some decent non-alcoholic cocktails can be found. Here are three of the best places

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Merry Christmas Mr Scrooge Christmas? Sometimes it just gets a bit much. Everywhere is overcrowded and overpriced and all they serve is stewed drinks with bits of twigs in them. Seasonal cynic Periwinkle Jones rounds-up some very un-Christmassy events to give your inner Scrooge a break from all that festive cheer Freddie Fortune’s End of the World Party, Village Underground Party like there’s no tomorrow – because, if you believe the Mayans, there won’t be. Which is a shame, as you’ve still got four doors left on your chocolate advent calendar. This end of the world party is being hosted by Rebel Bingo founder Freddie Fortune, so expect debauchery, debauchery and more debauchery after that. December 21, £4-8, theendoftheworld.fatsoma.com

THe moviestore collection ltd

Brian Cox and Robin Ince’s End of The World Show, Hammersmith Apollo Brian Cox and Robin Ince will be celebrating the human race’s greatest achievements, from science to comedy to music – because we’re all going to die the next day, remember? Spend your Christmas shopping money on this, rather than your loved ones, and feel smug as everyone who has wasted hours wrapping presents meets their fiery death come morning. Alternatively, you might also want to try Mr Ince’s other display of seasonal cynicism, Nine Lessons and Carols for Godless People (see p32). December 21, £25-40, hammersmithapollo.com The Prodigy, O2 Brixton Academy Let Keith, Liam and the gang blast those nauseating Christmas tunes from your head with monster hits such as Firestarter, Poison, Smack My Bitch Up and Jingle Bells (just kidding). December 18-20, £45, o2academybrixton.co.uk

Death – A Self Portrait, Wellcome Collection What’s the perfect antidote to Christmas cheer? Skulls! And lots of them. Delve into the morbid and macabre with this large collection of deaththemed artwork. Until February 23, free, wellcomecollection.org The Decapitated Puppy Dark and Rude Comedy Night, The Intrepid Fox Warning to Intrepid Fox virgins: this venue operates a strict dress code – anyone spotted wearing a suit or a tie will be garotted. The bar itself is packed with skulls, bones and robot taxidermy and staffed by a friendly bunch of Tim Burton-esque characters. This comedy night is not for the easily offended – featured acts Edward Aczel, James Mason, Mark Stephenson, Bobby Carroll, Michael Kossew, Tyson Boyce and MC Bobby Carroll will cross the line, reverse back over the line, then set the line on fire with flaming kittens. December 12, £6, lastminute.com The Animals and Children Took to the Streets, National Theatre A clever mix of animation, live acting, song and story-telling, this production from celebrated theatre company 1927 tells of a group of children who wreak mayhem. It’s satirical, fun, deliciously dark and the perfect antidote to all the ‘happily ever after’ malarkey doing the rounds at this time of year. Until December 27, £12-£24, nationaltheatre.org.uk

American Psycho, Prince Charles Cinema Nothing dulls the Christmas spirit quite like a tale of egotism, psychopathy and investment banking. Watching Christian Bale’s private life spin out of control as he loses his grip between fantasy and reality (and butchers a few innocents for good luck) will prepare you for an afternoon listening to your high-flying siblings bellow and bore over Christmas dinner. December 23, £10, princecharlescinema.com Doctors, Dissection and Resurrection Men, Museum of London The basis of this exhibition reads like an Indiana Jones film: 262 bodies were excavated at the Royal London Hospital in Whitechapel, including the victims of amputation, autopsy and dissection – victims of the grisly 19th century body trade. Far more exciting carcasses to pick over than the left-over turkey’s. Until April 2013, free, museumoflondon.org.uk The War of the Worlds – The New Generation, The O2 Jeff Wayne’s musical version of HG Wells’ The War of the Worlds is such an easy sell that we’ll just throw words at you – Jason Donovan, Kaiser Chiefs’ Ricky Wilson, alien invasion, holographic Liam Neeson, 30ft Martian fighting machine. Then, when you’re stuck at Midnight Mass with your family, pass the time by planning who exactly you’ll save when the aliens come for us. December 15, £42-£64, theo2.co.uk scoutlondon.com Scout London 17

ONGOING

Winter Wonderland at Hyde Park, W2 2UH Hyde Park Corner From Nov 23, Mon-Sun 10am-10pm, except Nov 23, 5pm-10pm, closed Dec 25, ends Jan 6, FREE, ride prices vary. A yuletide market, Santa’s factory and various rides including a double-decker carousel, star flyer and three rollercoasters. Until Jan 6.

Monday December 10

Meet Santa In His Reindeer Lodge at ZSL London Zoo, Regent’s Park Outer Circle, NW1 4RY Camden Town From Nov 17, Mon-Sun, phone for times, ends Dec 24, phone for prices. Visit the grotto in the reindeer herd’s home and receive a gift. Until Dec 24. Cabaret Mechanical Theatre - Part Two at Space Station Sixty-Five, North Cross Road, SE22 9ET East Dulwich Thu-Sun 12noon-6pm, ends Jan 6, FREE, except for a few coin-operated machines. An impressive collection of automata, many of which can be operated at the touch of a button. Until Jan 6. The Christmas Pop-Up at Artisan80, Harlesden Road, NW10 2BE Dollis Hill From Dec 4, Tue-Sat 11am-5pm, ends Dec 22, phone for prices. Festive stalls and gift ideas. Until Dec 22. Natural History Museum Ice Rink at Natural History Museum, Cromwell Road, SW7 5BD South Kensington Mon-Wed, Sun 10am-10pm, Thu-Sat 10am-11pm, £11.50 & £13.50, child £8 & £9, family £31 & £36, 10am-10pm. Young and old take to 950-square metres of ice against the dramatic backdrop of the world renowned museum. Until Jan 6. Skate At Somerset House at Somerset House, The Strand, WC2R 1LA Temple £8.50-£15, Jan 3 & 4 NUS £8.50, 10am10.15pm. Ice rink set in the grounds of this magnificent building.

Board Games And Beyond! at Upstairs At The Ritzy, Coldharbour Lane, SW2 1JG Brixton FREE, 6.30pm, doors. Led by board games champion and enthusiast Charlie Fish. Can We Learn From History?: Lecture at London School Of Economics, Houghton Street, WC2A 2AE Temple FREE, ticketed, 6.30pm-8pm. Broadcaster Andrew Marr and Professor Craig Calhoun discuss how today’s world can learn from past events. Robert H Smith Renaissance Sculpture Lecture at Victoria & Albert Museum, Cromwell Road, SW7 2RL South Kensington FREE, ticketed, 6.30pm. Professor Patricia Rubin and sculptor Antony Gormley discuss sculpture’s placement and its theoretical position among the arts.

John Lithgow: Talk at National Theatre: Olivier, South Bank, SE1 9PX Waterloo £4, concs £3, 6pm. The actor, musician and author talks to Nicholas Hytner about his career.

Transport for London travel update

Tuesday December 11 Farrago Poetry Slam at RADA, 62-64 Gower Street, WC1E 6ED Goodge Street £6, concs £5, 7.30pm. Performance poetry. Peter Hook: Talk at Rough Trade East, Brick Lane, E1 6QL Aldgate East FREE, w/wristband gained by pre-ordering the book, 7pm. Talk with the Joy Division and New Order bassist. Lyrically Challenged at Passing Clouds, Richmond Road, E8 4AA Dalston Kingsland £3, FREE before 8pm, 7pm. Poetry readings and an open mic. Stitch N Bitch at The Earl Ferrers Pub, 22 Streatham Ellora Road, SW16 6JF FREE, 8pm. Knitting group. A Victorian Christmas at Fulham Palace, Bishops Avenue, SW6 6EA Putney Bridge £10, 7pm-9pm. The history of modern-day Christmas.

Wednesday December 12 Pete Brown: Talk at Waterstones, London Wall, 54-55 London Wall, EC2M 5RA Liverpool Street FREE, 1pm. The author discusses his book, Shakespeare’s Local. Earth’s Earliest Predators: Talk at Natural History Museum, Cromwell Road, SW7 5BD South Kensington FREE, 2.30pm-3pm. A staff member discusses finds from the Burgess Shale fossil field. Ian Rankin: Book Signing at Waterstones, Leadenhall Market, 2-3 Whittington Avenue, Leadenhall Market, EC3V 1PJ Bank FREE, 12.30pm. The author signs copies of his book Standing In Another Man’s Grave. Street Music: Poems With Mike Marqusee: Poetry Reading at Housmans Bookshop, 5 Caledonian Road, N1 9DX King’s Cross St Pancras £3 redeemable against purchase, 7pm. The poet reads from his works.

Thursday December 13 Pat Morris: A History Of Taxidermy at Viktor Wynd Fine Art Inc, 11 Mare Street, E8 4RP Cambridge Heath £5£13.20, 7pm, doors 6pm. Dr Pat Morris’ illustrated lecture will explore why taxidermy is so interesting. The Scarab Beetles Of Peru: Talk at Natural History Museum, Cromwell Road, SW7 5BD South Kensington FREE, 2.30pm-3pm. A scientist discusses tropical region fieldwork and the country’s insects.

Friday December 14

Northern line No service Camden Town to Edgware, until 8.30am southbound and 9am northbound on Sunday. For the latest information visit tfl.gov.uk

18 Scout London scoutlondon.com

Michael Rosen: Christmas Kid’s Event at Bookmarks, 1 Bloomsbury Street, WC1B 3QE Tottenham Court Road £4, child FREE, concs £2, 3pm. The former Children’s Laureate reads from his latest book, Fluff The Farting Fish.

Digital Reflexes: Craft And Code In Art And Design: Conference at Victoria & Albert Museum, Cromwell Road, SW7 2RL South Kensington FREE, ticketed, 10am. Talks and discussions about works based on contemporary digital culture. The Midnight Feasts at Battersea Arts Centre, Lavender Hill, SW11 5TN Clapham Junction FREE, 10pm. Christmas meal with live music. Matt Thorne: Author Event at ICA, 12 Carlton House Terrace, The Mall, SW1Y 5AH Charing Cross £8, concs £6, mems £5, 5pm. The author and ICA curator Tom Wilcox discuss Thorne’s biography of the musician Prince.

Saturday December 15 Cookery Workshop: Edible Treats Fit For Charles Dickens at Museum Of London, 150 London Wall, EC2Y 5HN Barbican £28 per session, £99 4 sessions, 12noon4pm. Prepare Victorian recipes with TV chef and food historian Annie Gray. Secret Emporium Christmas Market at Factory 7, 13 Hearn Street, EC2A 3LS Shoreditch High Street FREE, 10.30am-8pm. Independent British designers showcase their wares, plus live music.

Sunday December 16 Discover Russia: Workshop (Ages 7-12) at Saatchi Gallery, Duke Of York’s HQ, King’s Road, SW3 4RY Sloane Square child £5, adv booking required, 2.30pm-4pm. Guided tour and creative workshop. Festive Family Fun Trail at English Heritage: Eltham Palace, Court Yard, Off Eltham FREE, Court Road, SE9 5QE plus admission £9.60, child £5.80, concs £8.60, family £25, 11am-4pm. Greenwich Circus Festival 2012 at The Hangar Arts Trust, Unit 7A, Mellish House Harrington Way, SE18 5NR Woolwich Dockyard child £6, child concs £5, family £25, over 16s £15 & £25, over 16s concs £12, times vary. Circus shows, workshops and family activities, plus adults-only events. Anthony Marwood And David Waterman: Workshop at Kings Place, 90 York Way, N1 9AG King’s Cross St Pancras FREE, 2.30pm. ChamberStudio offers highlevel masterclasses and support to young professional chamber groups. Secret Emporium Christmas Market at Factory 7, 13 Hearn Street, EC2A 3LS Shoreditch High Street FREE, 10.30am-8pm. Independent British designers showcase their wares, plus live music. Segway Rally at Alexandra Palace, Alexandra Palace Way, N22 7AY Wood Green adv £39, adv £32.50 per person for two or more participants, adv booking required, 9am-2pm, gates 8.30am. Using your weight to control your speed and direction as you glide around the gardens. The Sunday Sale Christmas Sale at The Bear Freehouse, 296a Camberwell New Road, SE5 0RP Oval FREE, 3pm11pm. Exclusive exposure to London based emerging brands and designers and an extensive collection of hand picked vintage jewellery, accessories and clothing for men, women and children.

THE ARCHITECTS A SHUNT EVENT A wildly disorientating performance chasing the tail of myths, memory and misanthropy; and the vague hope that amongst you there might also be a hero.

Until 2 February

www.shunt.co.uk www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/shunt-architects 020 7452 3000

Horse riding in Vauxhall? Cow milking near Canary Wharf? City farms are more popular than ever, as Ben Norum discovers

ondon used to be one big farm. Or rather, everything outside of the walls of the City of London, which we now know as the Square Mile, was for centuries farmland. There’s little trace of this today, of course, although a few area and street names do give the game away. Lambeth refers to the place where lambs would be landed from the river. Cowcross Street in Farringdon was part of the route between the cattle farming areas and Smithfield meat market. And anything with ‘Green’ at the end was probably grazing land. While Golders Green may no longer be such a prime spot for cattle, the city’s farming days aren’t up yet. The city farms scattered across London are small rural escapes in spots where you’d least expect them. And their popularity seems to be rising. In light of our growing food-sourcing consciousness and the tide of public opinion turning hard against factory farming, communities all over London are embracing locally-made products and making the most of locally-reared animals like never before. Hackney City Farm is perhaps the best known. Opened more than 20 years ago, and

20 Scout London scoutlondon.com

becoming increasingly proactive, it is home to animals such as chickens, donkeys, pigs and goats, as well as an on-site cafe (serving freshly-laid eggs) and a full itinerary of weekend courses: you can learn about food smoking, beekeeping, rug making and solar energy. Spitalfields City Farm runs regular Grow Your Own Classes for schools and individuals, and also has a Young Farmers’ Club to engage children. Vauxhall City Farm has on-site allotments and hosts activities such as horse riding. Mudchute Farm – a stone’s throw from Canary Wharf – has over 200 animals on-site, while an attached cafe serves up dishes made using its own eggs and veg.

Sowing the seeds Dalston farm shop

It’s interesting to note the location of many of these city farms and how they gravitate towards less wealthy parts of London – or, at least, those parts that were less wealthy in the late 70s and 80s, when many of them were founded. Formed by local community groups, they were often seen as a form of social activism, offering an opportunity for community engagement while creating new public spaces that would benefit the area. Kentish Town City Farm is a good example. Having turned 40 this year, it is celebrating by holding a heritage exhibition featuring memorabilia and photographs that examine the way the area and its people have changed over the years. The interest in rural practices and ethicallysourced food is also manifested in the popularity of both farmers’ markets and farm shops. FARM:Shop in Dalston would have never existed 40 years ago, but is an example of how, in spite of testing economic times, our desire to know where our food comes from is growing. There’s no grassland at this conspicuous high street store, but every piece of food is grown on-site, from lettuces grown up the wall to mushrooms in the basement and chickens on the roof. It could be a long time before we start knocking down buildings to create farmland. But at least what little we have seems more valued and valuable than ever before.

King....

A farming influence

Top Ten

city farms

Hackney City Farm Workshops & events with an animal focus E2 8QA Hoxton

City Farm London’s largest with over 2 Mudchute 200 animals E14 3HP Mudchute

City Farm Emphasis on growing your 3 Spitalfields own food E1 5AR Whitechapel

Kentish Town City Farm Weekly activities including pony club NW5 4BN Kentish Town

City Farm Compact, with allotments, 5 Vauxhall horses & eggs SE11 5HS Vauxhall

Docks Farm Try cow, goat and sheep 6 Surrey milking SE16 5ET Canada Water

Urban Farm Lots of birds and interactive 7 Hounslow owl displays TW14 OLZ Hatton Cross

Stepney City Farm Workshops including blacksmithing E1 3DG Stepney Green

City Farm Vegetarian cafe and 9 Freightliners petting zoo N7 8PF

Highbury & Islington

Grows in every inch of space 10 FARM:Shop E8 3AZ Dalston Junction

The Shed Notting Hill £££ Looking quite out of place just off Notting Hill Gate, The Shed’s mismatched panelling and rustic terrace make clear from the outset that this is no ordinary new west London opening. The Shed’s point of difference goes right back to its roots and the people who run it – the three Gladwin brothers. Gregory is a farmer, and responsible for supplying much of the restaurant’s meat, as well as sourcing other local ingredients; Oliver is a chef who previously worked at River Cottage; and restaurateur Richard oversees the front of house, as he used to at Bunga Bunga. Shunning the likes of starters and mains, as has become increasingly common on menus across London, the brothers instead divide dishes into headings such as Mouthfuls, Slow Cooking and Fast Cooking. Once you get your head around the fact that it is tapasstyle dining, it all starts to make a lot more sense, and we’re helpfully guided by the staff as to the suggested way of going about things. The small mouthfuls, each priced at £1.50, come first by way of appetite-whetters. Among them, a teeny pile of slightly chunky venison tartare makes a sterling first impression, while a spicy chorizo patty topped with creamy egg mayo wins in terms of both innovation and flavour. Next up are the main dishes. There are around 15 on the daily changing menu, and it is suggested that we order in ‘waves’, grouping together plates that will work well alongside one

another. Our first opens with a cockle and clam tagliatelle that woos with its garlicky, buttery sauce. But if that’s good, the next dish is bloody brilliant. Calamari-style cuttlefish is something of a revelation: a beacon of light which shows this beast doesn’t have to be in the slightest bit tough or chewy, but on the contrary can actually have an unctuously soft and creamy texture, which melts seductively into a milky sauce on entering the mouth. It’s hard for the following dishes to compete with that, but a dish of bone marrow (theatrically-presented in a large bone), served with capers, parsley and sourdough soldiers gives it a good go. Yes, the dish is more than a little reminiscent of the one made famous by Fergus Henderson at St John years ago, but it takes nothing away from the carnal pleasure of digging deep into a wine glass-height bone and pulling out the sumptuous gelatinous morsels like they’re x-rated jelly babies. Lamb chips (think fish fingers made with compressed lamb) feel equally hedonistic and not entirely unlike a breadcrumbed kebab. That’s a win, then. When it comes to cooking up seasonal British ingredients and serving them in creative ways, this is one restaurant that can certainly shed some light on the situation. Ben Norum 122 Palace Gardens Terrace, W8 4RT Notting Hill Gate scoutlondon.com Scout London 21

Zoilo Marylebone £££

Brompton Bar & Grill Chelsea ££

The latest in a line of Argentine openings, Zoilo is low-lit with a wide open kitchen and bar-style seating. It’s every bit the classic grill, but with an experimental edge. And we took on an experimental attitude to match, making a deliberate effort not to eat the steak, instead exploring the less standard Argentine offerings. Garlic prawns combined with pork belly and chorizo is a simple-sounding but heady combination. Breadcrumbed braised pig head is soft, creamy and rich in taste and texture. Grilled octopus is smoky with good bite, but the accompanying tuna mayo is a questionable choice. Chorizo brings things back on track, with just a hint of paprika and a good hit of pork. Oh, and the steak with celeriac mash is softly tender but with one almighty outburst of carnivorous flavour. Sorry, we couldn’t resist. BN

You may think that few of us have time to brunch very often, but a look at the clientele sitting down to eat at BB&G will make you think differently. Still, at £22 for two courses and a laid-back schedule that starts at midday at the weekend, it’s far from life’s most extravagant luxury. A selection of cured meats, salads and rillette are a much better way to start the day than the buzz of an alarm clock, and what follows is exemplary breakfast fare. Eggs Benedict are perfectly plump and runny yolked, served three to a plate. Smoked salmon is thickly sliced and generously piled. What really impresses, though, is the fish stew. It’s less orthodox, yes, but having tasted the earthily rich stock made from prawn shells as well as other fish, we’d happily swap our bowl of cornflakes for it any day. BN

9 Duke Street, W1U 3EG

Bond Street

243 Brompton Road, SW3 2EP

South Kensington

Gail’s Kitchen Bloomsbury ££

Balans Soho ££

With shops all over the city, Gail’s Artisan Bread has become a big brand in the baking world. This new opening sees the team take on a whole restaurant. The connection? That all the dishes are inspired by bread or the bread oven. Needless to say, this isn’t the place for carb-free suppers or light lunches, but it does hearty fare in style. We’d challenge any cold day or sniffly nose not to be beaten into submission by a bowl of rich chicken soup baked in the oven with a bread crust. And if that doesn’t do the trick, then a meltingly tender dish of braised oxtail served in its own pitch black stock certainly should. If you need to resort to the closing act of freshly-baked cookies served with a little bottle of milk you know your cold must be bad. But, quite frankly, how could you resist either way? BN

This Soho institution turns 25 this week. Whether it’s an enduring popularity or a handy location that keep it busy is hard to tell, but it’s certainly loud. There’s no faulting its generosity: a starter of truffled chicken liver parfait with red onion marmalade is hefty and rich, if not all that truffley. Slow roast pork belly is perked up by some roast fennel, and pleasingly soft and crisp in varying parts. It’s the quality of meat, not the chef, which lets it down flavour-wise, and it’s thoughts of sows’ ears not bellies that dominate. Just like the martini that we try before sitting down (and have to explain how to make) and a deflated brownie which looks like it could do with some flour to perk it up a bit, the food is never far short of enjoyable, but can’t quite get beyond mediocrity. BN

11 Bayley Street, WC1B 3HD 22 Scout London scoutlondon.com

Tottenham Court Road

60-62 Old Compton Street, W1D 4UG

Leicester Square

CENTRAL

Emparo Pizza 1 Stroud Green Road, N4 2DQ Finsbury Park Pizza £ London is particularly bad when it comes to decent pizza places that stay open late. If you’re in the Finsbury Park area, Emparro Pizza is the remedy. There’s no pretence of gourmet, but with crisp bases, a wide range of toppings and very decent prices, what more could you want? XO 29 Belsize Lane, NW3 5AS Belsize Park Pan-Asian £££ Ricker Restaurants, who are behind Notting Hill’s E&O and Shoreditch’s Great Eastern Dining Rooms, bring a touch of glamour to Belsize Park with this venue offering Asian flavours and a sleek cocktail bar.

EAST

Platform 56-58 Tooley Street, SE1 2SZ London Bridge British ££ This restaurantcome-late-night bar is particularly interesting where its meat is concerned. The farmer who supplies the restaurant has shares in it, and the restaurant vice versa. All meat is butchered on-site.

Roti Chai 3 Portman Mews South, W1H 6HS Marble Arch Indian ££ Tonight and next Monday see Roti Chai’s Christmas supperclubs take place in its downstairs dining area. Special festive and wintery dishes include Christmas butter chicken, made with cinnamon, star anise and fenugreek, and saffron tikka. The menu is available at £19 for two courses and £22 for three courses. The Grill Room 68 Regent Street, W1B 4DY Piccadilly Grill ££££ The Cafe Royal on Regent Street has been in the midst of a refurb for months now, but has finally reopened with this new Grill Room at its heart. Dine in surrounds frequented by Oscar Wilde, George Bernard Shaw and Virginia Woolf. Urban Tea Rooms 19 Kingly Street, W1B 5PY Oxford Circus Cafe £ A daily changing menu of sandwiches, salads and cakes, made fresh and from organic, local ingredients. A lunchtime favourite in the West End. Bincho 16 Old Compton Street, W1D 4TL Leicester Square Japanese ££ A sure contender for the title of ‘restaurant in London which uses the most skewers’, highlights of this Japanese Yakitori grill bar in Soho include grilled gizzards and chicken hearts. There are, of course, a few more conventional meats, too. And lots of sake.

North Park View Cafe 327 Green Lanes, N4 2ES Manor House Cafe ££ Nestled alongside Finsbury Park at the Manor House end, this cafe is the locals’ top spot for breakfast. Order a full English with the works and request a cheeky dollop of chilli sauce to set it off in authentic style.

WEST

Waterline 46 De Beauvoir Crescent, N1 5RY Haggerston Bar ££ Opening onto the Regent’s Canal, this modern bar prides itself on a few quirky back bar spirits alongside a decent beer and wine selection. Food is hearty with creative touches. Marika’s Kitchen Central Street Kitchen, 90 Central Street, EC1V 8AJ Old Street Cookery School ££ Back by popular demand are Marike’s pie-making classes, and this time she’s found a City location at new cookery school space Central Street Kitchen. Dates running through to March have now been announced, visit www.marikaskitchen.com to book tickets. HKK Worship Street, EC2A 2DQ Shoreditch High Street Chinese ££ Inspired by Chinese banqueting traditions, HKK comes from the esteemed Hakkasan Group and is overseen by their executive chef Tong Chee Hwee. The focus is on a tasting menu of Chinese and regional Cantonese dishes. The Water Poet 9-11 Folgate Street, E1 6BX Liverpool Street Gastropub ££ From sharing charcuterie platters to whole hog roasts, The Water Poet takes its food offering very seriously indeed. The drinks don’t suffer, either. On a Friday and Saturday night, you might find the crowd take themselves a little seriously, though. Gourmet San 261 Bethnal Green Road, E2 6AH Bethnal Green Chinese ££ Pig lungs and intestines, jellyfish, fish heads and wickedly spicy sauces are par for the course here. It’s not pretty and it’s not that friendly, but it is one hell of an experience.

SOUTH

The Drapers Arms 44 Barnsbury Street, N1 1ER Highbury & Islington Gastropub ££ Plenty of ales, plenty of wine, and plenty of food is the mantra here. Though not necessarily in that order. Roasts and hearty, slow-cooked dishes are comfort food at its pubby best, while board games add to the entertainment.

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Zapiecek 114 Greyhound Lane, SW16 5RN Streatham Common Polish ££ A tucked-away family-run restaurant that excels in bringing traditional Polish dishes to London. It’s already proving popular with both Polish locals and born-and-bred Brits. Perfect Blend 8-9 Streatleigh Parade, SW16 1EQ Streatham Hill Cafe £ Streatham is slowly dragging itself into the fold alongside nearby foodie destinations such as Balham and Brixton. This pleasant cafe was one of the area’s first decent spots for well-made coffee, tasty paninis and hearty breakfasts.

L’Etranger 36 Gloucester Road, SW7 4QT Gloucester Road Fusion ££££ This unique fusion restaurant blends together the cuisines of France and Japan to create intricate and balanced dishes. Think sashimi layered with truffle shavings and foie gras sushi rolls. Yep, it’s decadent... Potli 319 King St, W6 9NH Hammersmith Indian ££ Indian classics get a contemporary twist at this shockingly white, bright and fancified restaurant. Better not spill your five lentil dhal, then. Okawari 13 Bond Street, W5 5AP Ealing Broadway Japanese ££ Sushi, noodles, ramen, Japanese curries and teriyaki – if it’s Japanese, Okawari has it. For maximum effect, sit at the sushi bar and watch the chef expertly prepare your meal. If that wasn’t enough, there’s also a karaoke machine... not that you can hear it from the bar!

Albertine 1 Wood Lane W12 7DP Shepherd’s Bush Wine bar ££ In the run-up to Christmas, Albertine are offering customers looking for take-away wines the full expertise of their staff. Three wine case selections will be available, offering a complete wine package for the Christmas period, from bubbly to Port. Just choose from the affordable, classic or alternative options and tell the staff the kind of thing you’re after.

Scout London Price Guide ££££ Over £19 per main £££ £14-18 ££ £9-13 £ Under £9

EAT IN

COOK OUT

Joe & Steph’s

School of Wok

Those trying this new gourmet popcorn, which comes in flavours such as Caramel & Spanish Brandy, Madras Curry and Caramel Macchiato & Whisky, are advised thus: “First enjoy the aroma, then the pleasing crunch, before relishing the flavours as they flourish on the palette.” That sounds a little worthy to us, but having tried it we know just what they mean. The unique range of flavours also means you could just about kid yourself into believing you’re having a three course meal rather than a popcorn binge.

Sorry M&S, but there’s a new kind of gift voucher in town. While this Covent Garden cookery school’s offering might not be as useful when it comes to buying pants, it certainly is when Oriental cookery is concerned. Buy a voucher for a friend (or yourself) and enjoy everything from a Quick Fire Street Food lesson to a sushi-rolling masterclass or the quick cooking, stir-fry oriented Wok & Roll sessions. Wok on! Courses and vouchers start at £45. Book at schoolofwok.co.uk or 61 Chandos Place, WC2N 4HG.

From independent retailers and joeandstephs.co.uk. Approx £4 per 80g bag.

scoutlondon.com Scout London 25

Brighten up your Christmas day Exclusive gifts and souvenirs at London Transport Museum shop, Covent Garden Piazza, London WC2 Shop opens daily or buy online

ltmuseumshop.co.uk

Background poster image: Brightest London is best reached by Underground By Horace Taylor, 1924

A secret shopping spot With its twinkling lights and narrow streets, St Christopher’s Place, off Oxford Street, is a delightful hidden Christmas shopping spot. We pick our favourite items

What a card

Wristy business

Go nuts in the shower

This cute little business card holder will ensure you’re remembered after the meeting. Stripeodelic card holder £3.07 from

Carry a little piece of very ancient history on your cuff – these feature a darker tone cognac amber. Sterling silver cufflinks, £87.20 from

This almond shower oil transforms into a lavish, softening foam when it comes into contact with water. Almond Shower Oil, £16.50 from

Scarf-face

Tune up

the essential

Wrap yourself up rather than the presents. Georgette Scarf, £25 from Hampstead Bazaar

This hand-painted festive music box harks back to a vintage Christmas. Christmas Music Box, £25.95 from

The Christmas classic. We love these cotton knit ties, available in a wide variety of colours. Striped cotton ties, £39.95 from

Prints International

The Amber Centre

Petit Chou

L’Occitane de Provence

T Burrows

scoutlondon.com Scout London 27

Thu 17 Jan (Sold Out) & Wed 27 Mar

Sinéad O’Connor Crazy Baldhead Tour Fri 25 Jan An evening with

Cowboy Junkies Sat 26 Jan

Sahara Soul with Bassekou Kouyaté & Ngoni Ba, Tamikrest and Sidi Touré Sun 3 Mar (3pm & 7.30pm shows)

Bobby McFerrin SpiritYouAll Wed 20 Mar

Yo La Tengo The City of London Corporation is the founder and principal funder of the Barbican Centre

barbican.org.uk

The poster boy Greg Miller uses pages from old comic books, magazines and advertising to create canvases that evoke a nostalgic view of America, as James Edwards discovers

courtesy scream / © greg miller

reg Miller’s art will have something of a familiar feel for anyone who’s taken the Tube. The multilayered works are evocative of the Underground advertising boards which have remnants of old, ripped-down posters still clinging to them in makeshift collages of past campaigns. A selection of Miller’s work – which uses old magazines, comic

books and advertising from his home in America – has now gone on display in London. The artist’s creations draw inspiration from influential pop artist Roy Lichtenstein, and are made by layering the old pages and adverts with paint to form images that swirl with nostalgia. They are finished with resin to give permanence to intangible memories of a bygone America.

“In the 50s I would drive with my dad from Northern California through the San Joaquin Valley because he did a lot of business in Los Angeles,” Miller says. “We would drive along the old Highway 99. And the billboards along the way were all ripped and torn. They were old. There was nothing fresh about them. “When I would see these posters I would get a sense of

history and time. I could see that we’re kind of visitors because we’re not of that time necessarily but I’m recording it and I’m painting it.” This second London solo exhibition is made up of new work by the Californian. Greg Miller – Four Corners, until January 5, Scream, 27-28 Eastcastle Street, screamlondon.com scoutlondon.com Scout London 29

Central

Antony Gormley: Model at White Cube Bermondsey, 144152 Bermondsey Street, SE1 3TQ London Bridge FREE, Until Feb 10. Large-scale sculpture and sitespecific installations. Roger Andersson: Babes In The Wood at Poppy Sebire Gallery, All Hallows Hall, 6 Copperfield Street, SE1 0EP Charing Cross FREE, Until Jan 26. Works on paper, new videos and a mobile sculpture. Cedric Arnold: Sacred Ink: The Tattoo Master at Brunei Gallery, SOAS, 10 Thornhaugh Street, WC1H 0XG Russell Square FREE, Until Dec 15. Photographs showing many aspects of tattooing. Authenticity - Want It, Got It, Lost It at Ellwood Atfield Gallery, 34 Smith Square, SW1P 3HL Westminster FREE, Until Dec 21. Photographs of commercial and public communicators. Barbadirame at The Italian Cultural Institute, 39 Belgrave Square, SW1X 8NX Hyde Park Corner FREE, Until Jan 4. Paintings by the celebrated Italian artist. Cecil Beaton: Theatre Of War at Imperial War Museum, Lambeth Road, SE1 6HZ Lambeth North £8, concs £6, under 16s FREE, Until Jan 1. Historic photographs, drawings and books documenting Beaton’s work for the Ministry of Information during the second world war. Best Art Vinyl 2012 at St Martins Lane Hotel, 45 St Martin’s Lane, WC2N 4HX Embankment FREE, Until Jan 13. The shortlisted 50 album sleeves for the annual award. A Bigger Splash: Painting After Performance at Tate Modern, Bankside, Holland Street, SE1 9TG Southwark £10, concs £8.50, Art Fund mems £5, concs £4.25, Until Apr 1. Works that examine the relationship between performance and painting. William Burroughs: All Out Of Time And Into Space at October Gallery, 24 Old Gloucester Street, WC1N 3AL Holborn FREE, Until Feb 16. Paintings, drawings and a selection of ‘talismanic’ art objects. Cartier-Bresson: A Question Of Colour at Somerset House, The Strand, WC2R 1LA Temple FREE, Until Jan 27. An exhibition featuring 10 previously unseen Cartier-Bresson images, as well as works by 14 contemporary photographers. Belgravia Gallery Christmas Exhibition at Belgravia Gallery, 45 Albemarle Street, W1S 4JL Green Park FREE, Until Jan 1. Works in various media by gallery artists including Nelson Mandela and Andy Warhol.

Constable, Gainsborough, Turner And The Making Of Landscape at Royal Academy Of Arts, Burlington House, Piccadilly, W1J 0BD Green Park £8, OAP/disabled/Art Fund mems £7, NUS £5, unwaged/ages 12-18 £4, ages 8-11 £3, under 8s FREE, family £18, Until Feb 17. More than 100 works by three significant British landscape painters. Death: A Self-Portrait: The Richard Harris Collection at The Wellcome Collection, 183 Euston Road, NW1 2BE Euston FREE, Until Feb 28. Around 300 items providing an overview of the iconography of death. Ugo Gattoni: Water For Elephants at The Book Club, 100-106 Leonard Street, EC2A 4RH Old Street FREE, Until Feb 3. The Paris-based illustrator’s depictions of tropical flora and fauna. Wayne Gooderham: The Secret History Of Second-Hand Books at Foyles, 113-119 Charing Cross Road, WC2H 0EB Tottenham Court Road FREE, Until Dec 13. Second-hand books containing personal inscriptions. Hartnell To Amies: Couture By Royal Appointment at Fashion And Textile Museum, 83 Bermondsey Street, SE1 3XF Borough £7, concs £5, Until Feb 23. London couture fashion by the designers to the Queen.

Karl Ferris: The Karl Ferris Psychedelic Experience at Proud Camden, The Horse Hospital, Chalk Farm Road, NW1 8AH Camden Town FREE, Until Feb 3. An exhibition of album covers and images by the English photographer and designer. Chris Hipkiss: L.I.E.S. at Ancient & Modern, 201 Whitecross Street, EC1Y 8QP Old Street FREE, Until Dec 22. Intricate pencil drawings of expansive landscapes populated by strange plants and characters. Jeremy Hutchison: E R R A T U M at Paradise Row, 74 Newman Street, W1T 3EL Tottenham Court Road FREE, Until Dec 21. Dysfunctional luxuries, each object having been made with an error. Neil Libbert: Photojournalist at National Portrait Gallery, 2 St Martin’s Place, WC2H 0HE Embankment FREE, Until Apr 21. Significant pictures selected from the photographer’s 55-year-long career. Jim Marshall : Rolling Stones 1972 at Snap Galleries, 8 Piccadilly Arcade, SW1Y 6NH Green Park FREE, Until Dec 31. Photographs capturing the Rolling Stones onstage and the quiet camaraderie behind the scenes. Greg Miller: Four Corners at Scream, 2728 Eastcastle Street, W1J 6QX Oxford Circus FREE, Until Jan 20. Mixed media work by the American artist.

It’s A Wonderful Life at Nancy Victor Gallery, 6 Charlotte Place, W1T 1SG Tottenham Court Road FREE, Until Jan 3. A show curated by Nancy Victor, in which a diverse group of artists including Chris Agnew and Lesley Hilling, showcase works that explore architecture, nostalgia, preservation and myth. The Northern Renaissance: Durer To Holbein at The Queen’s Gallery, Buckingham Palace, Birdcage Walk, SW1A 1AA Victoria £9.25, NUS/OAP £8.50, family £23, under 17s £4.65, under 5s FREE, Until Apr 14. Paintings, drawings, prints, manuscripts, sculpture, tapestries and armour. Pre-Raphaelites: Victorian Avant-Garde at Tate Britain, Millbank, SW1P 4RG Pimlico £14, concs £12.20, National Art Pass/Art Fund mems £7, concs £6.10, Until Jan 13. Over 150 works in different media exposing the Pre-Raphaelites as ahead of their time. Taylor Wessing Photographic Portrait Prize 2012 at National Portrait Gallery, 2 St Martin’s Place, WC2H 0HE Embankment £2, mems/accompanied under 12s FREE, Until Feb 17. Contemporary portrait photography competition. Vhils: Devoid at Lazarides Gallery, 11 Rathbone Place, W1T 1HR Tottenham Court Road FREE, Until Jan 17. A solo exhibition of recent works.

Dec 21. A series of interactive objects and films which capture the craziness in the preparation for Christmas. Despite: An Exhibition By Palestinian Artists at Rich Mix, 35-47 Bethnal Green Road, E1 6LA Aldgate East FREE, Until Dec 28. Works in various media by artists including Nidal Abu Oun, Mohamed Abusal and Jawad Al Malhi. Jennifer Talbot: Assemble at Vyner Street Gallery, 23 Vyner Street, E2 9DG Bethnal Green FREE, Until Dec 16. The artist stacks, props and hangs her paintings in an intentionally haphazard manner.

South Ansel Adams: Photography From The Mountains To The Sea at National Maritime Museum, Romney Road, SE10 9NF Greenwich £7, concs £5, mems FREE, Until Apr 28. Photographs of the natural landscapes of America. Pauline Boudry And Renate Lorenz: Toxic Play In Two Acts at South London Gallery, 65-67 Peckham Road, SE5 8UH Elephant & Castle FREE, Starts Fri, Until Feb 24. The Berlin-based duo showcases film installations Toxic and Salomania. Clive Head And Nicolas Poussin: From Victoria To Arcadia at Dulwich Picture Gallery, Gallery Road, SE21 7AD West Dulwich £5, OAP £4, concs FREE, Until Jan 13. Contemporary installation and Old Master paintings. Daniel Kramer: Photographs Of Bob Dylan at O2 Bubble, Millennium Way, SE10 0PH North Greenwich £12, child £6, concs £8, Until Feb 3. Images of the acclaimed folk and rock musician and writer. Jim Marshall: Rip This Joint: The Rolling Stones 1972 at O2 Bubble, Millennium Way, SE10 0PH North Greenwich £12, child £6, concs £8, Until Feb 3. A series of portraits of the British rock band, taken during their 1972 tour.

North

West

Brown Sugar On Main Street at Zebra One Art Gallery, 1 Perrins Court, NW3 1QX Hampstead FREE, Until Jan 26. A display of unseen and rare images of The Rolling Stones, by Peter Webb and Dominique Tarle. Judy Chicago And Louise Bourgeois, Helen Chadwick, Tracey Emin at Ben Uri Gallery, 108a Boundary Road, NW8 0RH Kilburn Park £5, child FREE, concs £4, Until Mar 10. A survey of the American artist and activist, contextualised with work by three other foremost European female artists.

Ballgowns: British Glamour Since 1950 at Victoria & Albert Museum, Cromwell Road, SW7 2RL South Kensington £10, concs available, Until Jan 6. A large display of ballgowns dating from 1950 to the present day. Comica: Comics, Manga & Co: The New Culture Of German Comics at Goethe-Institut, 50 Princes Gate, SW7 2PH South Kensington FREE, Until Dec 15. Drawings, paintings and books by the original avant-garde German comic artists and the new wave of artists they inspired. The Estate Of LS Lowry: A Selection Of Works at Crane Kalman Gallery, 178 Brompton Road, SW3 1HQ South Kensington FREE, Until Jan 12. Paintings, pastels and drawings, including previously unseen works Gaiety Is The Most Outstanding Feature Of The Soviet Union: New Art From Russia at Saatchi Gallery, Duke Of York’s HQ, King’s Road, SW3 4RY Sloane Square FREE, Until May 5. A large survey featuring contemporary works. Julian Yewdall: A Permanent Record at Subway Gallery, Kiosk 1 Joe Strummer Subway, Edgware Road, W2 1DX Edgware Road FREE, Until Dec 22. Photographs of the frontman of The Clash, Joe Strummer.

East Angela Flowers At 80 at Flowers, Kingsland Road, 82 Kingsland Road, E2 8DP Hoxton FREE, Until Jan 9. Mixed works celebrating the birthday of the founder of the gallery. Keith Arnatt at Maureen Paley, 21 Herald Street, E2 6JT Bethnal Green FREE, Until Jan 23. Portrait photography. Aspen Magazine: 1965-1971 at Whitechapel Gallery, 80-82 Whitechapel High Street, E1 7QX Aldgate East FREE, Until Mar 3. All 10 complete sets of the cult 1960s publication. Building A Wilton’s Christmas at Wilton’s Music Hall, 1 Graces Alley, off Ensign Street, E1 8JB Aldgate East FREE, Until

scoutlondon.com Scout London 31

Festivities for the faithless Christmas is great. But there’s something incongruous about celebrating it if you don’t believe in Jesus. Comic Robin Ince tells Si Hawkins about his seasonal celebration – for atheists

hristmas gigs are often anything but festive for comedians, particularly those of a more cerebral bent. The work may be better paid than usual, but performing to boorish partygoers who’ve been boozing since noon can play havoc with the ego. “You’re not being paid for your material,” suggests old-hand Robin Ince. “You’re being paid for the amount of shame you’re going to feel afterwards, the self-loathing.” A science-obsessed polemicist, Ince was never very suited to the December gigs, so gave them up and started an event of his own, setting about reclaiming the festive season for faithless folk. Now in its fifth year and spread over seven December evenings, Nine Lessons and Carols for Godless People has become a fully-fledged Yuletide institution. A varied mix of comedians, musicians, scientists, poets and at least one graphic novelist descend

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on the Bloomsbury Theatre for an unpredictable Christmas stocking of a show, with Ince as Santa Claus (albeit a Santa Claus who spends much of his stage time apoplectic with rage). “The shows are inspired by what I saw as a teenager, going to subterranean comedy clubs,” says Ince, harking back to nights where singers would share a bill with “Vic Reeves, holding a crab, singing the theme to Star Trek”. So impressive and extensive is the list of past performers that Ince struggles manfully to single out favourite guests. But “it’s always enjoyable wondering what [graphic novelist] Alan Moore’s going to talk about when he wanders onstage, because quite often he’ll change that night by night. Or [chemist] Andrea Sella, when he goes on with a giant test tube, the suspense to see what kind of explosion happens.” When the show began in 2008 Ince admits that “most

people thought it was a ridiculous idea”. But then he bumped into atheist overlord Richard Dawkins in an unlikely daytime setting (“that’s the way these showbiz/ evolutionary biology crossovers occur, on the sofa at Richard and Judy”), and persuaded him to appear. Nine Lessons’ novel mixture of art and science now had the ultimate seal of approval. Backstage is certainly an interesting meeting of minds. The acclaimed singer-songwriter Darren Hayman is a regular guest, but remains rather in awe. “I think most of the stars think I’m a stage hand or caretaker,” smiles the former Hefner frontman. “They’re quite surprised when I take the guitar on stage: ‘Somebody stop that man!’ Three times I’ve been in the green room with Alan Moore and a copy of [classic 2000AD comic] Halo Jones and a marker pen in my bag. Three times I haven’t got it signed.” So how does Hayman feel

about appearing with scientists and comics? “The first year Robin had me go on after Ricky Gervais, which perturbed me until I realised that I’m actually much funnier than Ricky Gervais.” Despite the ‘Godless’ bit, Ince is keen to stress that Nine Lessons is about embracing science and the wonders of reality, rather than mocking believers. True, the outgoing Archbishop of Canterbury and numerous US politicians will probably get a kicking this year, following the same-sex marriage debate, but the host insists that “more and more religious people are coming to the shows.” Which means customers, not protestors. “We’ve never had any lunatics outside with placards,” Ince smiles. “Which in some ways has been a disappointment.” Nine Lessons and Carols for Godless People, December 15-20 and 22-23, Bloomsbury Theatre, thebloomsbury.com

ONGOING

Henning Wehn’s German Christmas Do at Leicester Square Theatre, 6 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BX Leicester Square Sat & Sun 4.30pm, £15.50, concs £13.50. The stand-up puts a festive spin on his usual show. Until Dec 16. Late Night Gimp Fight at Soho Theatre, 21 Dean Street, W1D 3NE Tottenham Court Road Thu-Sat 10.30pm, £15, concs £12.50. Sketches, songs and character comedy. Until Jan 5. Trevor Noah: The Racist at Soho Theatre, 21 Dean Street, W1D 3NE Tottenham Court Road Mon-Sat 7.30pm, Mon-Wed £15, concs £12.50, Thu-Sat £20, concs £17.50, phone for availability. The South African makes his London debut with a four-week run of wit and commentary. Until Jan 12. Jerry Sadowitz: Return Of The Bawbag at Leicester Square Theatre, 6 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BX Leicester Square Dec 11-13, 20-22, 27-29, Jan 3-5, 7.30pm, £19.50. Controversial and aggressive humour, and offbeat magic. Until Jan 5.

Monday December 10

Shaun Keaveny: Live And Langourous! at Pleasance Theatre, Carpenter’s Mews, North Road, N7 9EF Caledonian Road 7.30pm-8.30pm, £9, concs £8.50. The BBC 6Music DJ presents special wit, satire and special guests. Not Now, Bernard at The Wilmington Arms, 69 Rosebery Avenue, EC1R 4RL Angel 7.30pm, £6. With Cariad Lloyd, Late Night Gimp Fight, Thom Tuck, Horse and Louis, Lou Sanders and Nathan Dean Williams. Isy Suttie, Tony Hadoke, Ivo Graham at Amersham Arms, 388 New Cross Road, SE14 6TY New Cross 8pm-10.30pm, adv £5. Comedy from the Peep Show actress. Paul F Taylor: The Greatest Show In The World Ever: Work In Progress at Hen & Chickens, 109 St Paul’s Road, N1 2NA Highbury & Islington 7.30pm, £5. Inventive wit. Josh Widdicombe And Suzi Ruffell: Work in Progress at Pleasance Theatre, Carpenter’s Mews, North Road, N7 9EF Caledonian Road 8pm-10.15pm, £5. Quirky observations and offbeat storytelling as the stand-ups try out new material.

Tuesday December 11 Doc Brown: Work In Progress at Pleasance Theatre, Carpenter’s Mews, North Road, N7 9EF Caledonian Road 8pm, £10, phone for availability. Cultural satire and comedy raps. Gad Elmaleh at O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT Shepherd’s Bush 7pm, £35-£50, phone for availability. French stand-up and actor. Pageface at Etcetera Theatre, 265 Camden High Street, NW1 7BU Camden Town 7.30pm, £7, concs £5. Joey Page reveals the contents of his addled brain.

Wednesday December 12 The Decapitated Puppy Dark & Rude Comedy Night at The Intrepid Fox, 15 St Giles High Street, WC2H 8LN Tottenham Court Road 9pm, £6, concs £4. With Edward Aczel, James Mason, Bobby Carroll, Mark Stephenson, Michael Kossew and Tyson Boyce. Leukaemia Care Charity Comedy Night at The Camden Head, 100 Camden High Street, NW1 0LU Camden Town 7.30pm, £5. With This Glorious Monster, Damian Clark and Matt Price.

Helen O’Brien: Bronagh’s Big Weekend at Pleasance Theatre, Carpenter’s Mews, North Road, N7 9EF Caledonian Road 8pm-9pm, £10. Storytelling and sketches about a busy weekend for an Irish family.

The New Wave: London Residency at The Invisible Dot Ltd, 2 Northdown Street, N1 9BG King’s Cross St Pancras 7.45pm9.45pm, £8. With Sam Fletcher, Oyster Eyes, Ellie White, Cariad Lloyd and MC Simon Munnery.

Thursday December 13 Comedy Back Rub at The Camden Head, 100 Camden High Street, NW1 0LU Camden Town 7.30pm, £1. With Ben Target, David Mills, Yasmine Akram, Lou Sanders, Matthew Highton and MC Sarah Campbell. Grand Theft Impro at The Wheatsheaf, 25 Rathbone Place, W1T 1JB Tottenham Court Road 8.30pm10.15pm, £7. Improvised humour from Phil Whelans, Dylan Emery, Cariad Lloyd and special guests. Impropera’s Festive Fandango at Kings Place, 90 York Way, N1 9AG King’s Cross St Pancras 8pm, £2.50, adv £9.50. The group performs a surreal improvised opera. Shambles at Aces & Eights, 156-158 Fortess Road, NW5 2HP Tufnell Park 8pm, £5. With Pat Cahill, Lou Sanders, Mike Wozniak, Dan Cook, Tim Shishodia, Ross Lee and MC Harry Deansway. The Tommyfield Stands Up For Sparks at The Tommyfield, 185 Kennington Lane, SE11 4EZ Kennington 8pm, £5. With Nick Helm, Rich Wilson, Toby Brown, Dave Gibson, Martin Wyatt and Nick Sun.

Friday December 14 Jerry Sadowitz: W**k In Progress at Leicester Square Theatre, 6 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BX Leicester Square 8pm, £14.50. Controversial and aggressive humour, and offbeat magic. An Audience With Mac McFadden?! at Hen & Chickens, 109 St Paul’s Road, N1 2NA Highbury & Islington 9pm, £5. The rhyming funnyman performs moving and comical verse. The Good Ship Comedy Club at The Good Ship, 289 Kilburn High Road, NW6 7JR Kilburn 7.30pm, £5. With Pappy’s, Ben Target, Bec Hill and Brett Goldstein.

Alex Horne: Seven Years In The Bathroom at Royal Albert Hall, Kensington Gore, SW7 2AP South Kensington 8.30pm, £13.50. Intelligent wit.

Amateur Transplants: Adam Kay’s Smutty Christmas Songs at Leicester Square Theatre, 6 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BX Leicester Square 7.30pm, £20, concs £16. Dark and edgy re-workings of festive songs. Banana Cabaret at The Bedford, 77 Bedford Hill, SW12 9HD Balham 9pm, £14, concs £11. With Simon Evans, Addy Van Der Borgh, Mark Maier and Carl Hutchinson. Clever Peter’s New Material Night at Pleasance Theatre, Carpenter’s Mews, North Road, N7 9EF Caledonian Road 8pm-9pm, £5. With Sam Fletcher, Rachel Parris and Allnutt & Simpson.

Alun Cochrane: Moments Of Alun at Leicester Square Theatre, 6 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BX Leicester Square 9.30pm, £12. Dry observations, intelligent storytelling and anecdotes. Paul Foot: Kenny Larch Is Dead at The Bloomsbury Theatre, 15 Gordon Street, WC1H 0AH Euston 7.30pm, £15. Surreal humour. Frisky & Mannish: Extra-Curricular Activities at KOKO, 1a Camden High Street, NW1 7JE Mornington Crescent 7.30pm, £15. Fast-paced musical comedy, with special guests Abandoman, Abi Collins and Bruce Airhead. Rainer Hersch’s Classic Comedy Orchestra at Hen & Chickens, 109 St Paul’s Road, N1 2NA Highbury & Islington 9.30pm, £12.50. The stand-up and conductor shares his love of classical music. Shotgun Impro at Etcetera Theatre, 265 Camden High Street, NW1 7BU Camden Town 7.30pm, £6.50. Audience suggestions provide the inspiration for fast-paced improvisation. Streatham Comedy Club at The Hideaway, Stanthorpe Road, SW16 2ED Streatham 8.30pm, £12, NUS/concs £6, adv £10. With Ninia Benjamin, Erich McElroy and Tom Webb.

Saturday December 15 Amateur Transplants: Adam Kay’s Smutty Christmas Songs at Leicester Square Theatre, 6 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BX Leicester Square 7.30pm, £20, concs £16. Dark and edgy re-workings of festive songs. Bowjangles: Bowlympics at Lauderdale House, Highgate Hill, Waterlow Park, N6 5HG Archway 10am, 11.30am, £4.50, concs £3, under 2s FREE. Musical comedy group. Dave Gorman’s Screen Guild at Hoxton Hall, 130 Hoxton Street, N1 6SH Old Street 7.30pm, £12, phone for availability. Monthly gathering of Gorman’s favourite established and rising stand-ups.

Sunday December 16 99 Club Leicester Square at Storm, 28a Leicester Square, WC2H 7LE Leicester Square 8pm, £20, £30 inc meal. With Patrick Monahan, Prince Abdi, Paddy Lennox and MC Mowten. Comedy Store Players at Comedy Store, 1a Oxendon Street, SW1Y 4EE Piccadilly Circus 7.30pm, £17, concs £12. With Paul Merton, Josie Lawrence, Neil Mullarkey, Lee Simpson, Andy Smart and Richard Vranch. Comedy Variety Cabaret at Downstairs At The King’s Head, 2 Crouch End Hill, N8 8AA Finsbury Park 8.30pm, £7, concs £5. With Tobias Persson, Nick Doody, Phil Chapman, Joe K, David Jesudason and MC Howard Smith. Sandro Monetti: Clooney, Cowell, Pitt And Me! at Leicester Square Theatre, 6 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BX Leicester Square 8.30pm, £10. The journalist and writer shares witty stories of his encounters with celebrities. Storytellers’ Club: Christmas Tales at Pleasance Theatre, Carpenter’s Mews, North Road, N7 9EF Caledonian Road 8pm-9.30pm, £10, concs £8. With Howard Read, Lucy Porter, Sara Pascoe, James Dowdeswell and Sarah Bennetto.

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Easy as Pi

Oscar-winning director Ang Lee has made his first 3D film, and the results are spectacular. He tells Kate Whiting about bringing Yann Martel’s ‘unfilmable’ book, Life Of Pi, to the big screen

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he heart of Soho is not the kind of place you’d expect to have a deep, philosophical conversation – unless there’s a serious amount of gin involved. But, sat in The Soho Hotel on this particular morning, that’s exactly what we encounter. And it’s due to one man: Ang Lee. The Taiwanese director of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and Brokeback Mountain is in town to discuss his first foray into 3D film, with the ambitious adaptation of Yann Martel’s Man Booker Prizewinning Life Of Pi. “When you’re obsessed by the material, it does feel like God told you to make it; if not God, a film

god,” he says, smiling. “It always feels like the movie wants to meet the audience and that you’re chosen. I belong to the movie and the movie belongs to me.” At first, though, Lee didn’t believe the book would make a film. “When I read it 10 years ago, I didn’t think there was a movie there,” he admits of the story, about an Indian boy called Pi who is shipwrecked and spends months at sea in the company of an adult Bengal tiger called Richard Parker. But five years later, the director was approached by Twentieth Century Fox about making it. 3D as we know it was still in its infancy, James Cameron had not yet released Avatar, and Lee had to

Nice as Pi Suraj Sharma

Johan Persson

records, Lee believes Cameron was still fairly “conservative” in his use of the technology. “At that time, he had an important point to make: 3D is not about this,” he says, swirling his hands towards me, “so very conservatively, he put everything behind a screen. I think the biggest difference is that now we’re more putting things out of the screen. “It’s very exciting, because you establish a new cinematic language between yourself and an audience. It’s progressing so much – a year from now, people will look back [at my film] and say, ‘Oh they were too timid’, and do something else.” Life Of Pi is more spinetinglingly incredible than Avatar and will no doubt earn Lee his third Oscar nomination for Best Director. But it also presented him with his biggest challenge so far. Those who’ve read Martel’s book will know that it’s about learn a new way of filmmaking. “There’s no school – I wish there were schools! The only reference we had was cheap horrors, so that didn’t really inspire me,” he says, chuckling gently. “The first important lesson is that you can’t let anyone tell you what 3D is, you just have to ignore them and find what works for your eyes. And then I learned I can’t trust my eyes anymore because it’s a new illusion and your eyes keep adjusting to it. Whatever you do, it is like groping in the dark. “But I was a trailblazer. I give myself some credit. Most people probably don’t know we were groping in the dark.” Although Avatar broke box office

Pi survives by teaching himself to fish and training Richard Parker to keep his distance. But when the Japanese authorities later question him over the ship’s fate, they don’t believe this version of events so Pi tells them another tale in which the animals are all human. “It’s scary in so many ways, because you’re stuck with a second story. There’s no way I could just tell the first story as a triumphant adventure and not tell the second,” says Lee. Most of the film is just Pi and Richard Parker in the middle of the ocean, so conjuring vast waves, creating a tiger and casting Pi were Lee’s most pressing concerns. After a six-month audition process, he found 18-year-old Suraj Sharma, who lives in Delhi with his parents and had never acted before. “Directing him, it’s such an uncanny experience – he’s such a talent, like he’s done this all his

I was a 3D film trailblazer 99 66

reality, the power of storytelling and faith. Pi’s family runs a zoo in Pondicherry, and decide to sell their animals in Canada, embarking on a treacherous voyage in a Japanese ship, which capsizes in a storm. Pi finds himself in a lifeboat with a zebra, hyena, orangutan and Richard Parker the tiger. The hyena kills the zebra and orangutan, then Richard Parker kills the hyena.

life. He reminds me of those little Buddhas where you just remind him what he used to know in a previous life,” says Lee. Sharma had to learn not only how to act, but also how to swim, while also losing weight to play the starving Pi. Lee’s sense of responsibility was further heightened when Sharma’s mother appointed the

director as her son’s guru in a Hindu ceremony. “It was one day after I cast him, his mother said, ‘There’s something we have to do, can we go to your room?’ And she lit candles and had flowers and put something over my shoulder while Suraj was lying flat on his face and touching my feet to show submissiveness – it’s a pretty serious deal.” Rather than being a hindrance, working with a novice actor was a blessing for the director. “The good thing about starting from zero is you don’t have to reduce any bad habits,” he smiles. While Sharma in character as Pi was on his own odyssey, the cast and crew also went on a journey. “In the first part, everybody’s telling him what to do, from getting good sea-legs to technical stuff like continuity. “We were shooting in order, so in the last month, Pi’s losing his sanity and is really skinny and he has a spiritual look on his face. “I forbade anybody to talk to him, so he had to live in silence. The last part is a strange journey, it’s kind of holy to me. He sort of became the spiritual leader of the group; there’s a certain innocence and heart to it, he reminds you what filmmaking’s about in your heart. The innocence of making the movie is precious.” And, after bringing the story to life, which version of Pi’s tale does Lee believe? “That’s pretty obvious,” he says, laughing again. “I spent £70 million on one story... but I shall leave that to everybody’s choice!” Life Of Pi is released in cinemas on December 20 scoutlondon.com Scout London 35

new releases

Code Name: Geronimo (15) You wait ages for a testosterone-fuelled dramatisation of the hunt for Osama bin Laden – which ended in May 2011 with a night-time raid on a compound in Pakistan – and two arrive at the same time. Released a month before Kathryn Bigelow’s Oscar-tipped Zero Dark Thirty, Code Name: Geronimo explores the camaraderie between Navy SEALs Stunner (Cam Gigandet) and Cherry (Anson Mount) as they follow intelligence gathered by a ballsy CIA analyst (Kathleen Robertson) as part of the biggest manhunt in American history. Director John Stockwell lets his male cast posture in their khakis as scriptwriter Kendall Lampkin provides basic characterisation to compel us to care for the troops during the final assault. It’s all competently executed but fairly flimsy next to Bigelow’s nerveracking journey into the heart of darkness. DS

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (12A) In 2004, when Peter Jackson clasped three Oscars to his proud, New Zealand-born bosom for The Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King, he distanced himself from the proposed film version of The Hobbit. Eight years later, lo and behold, Jackson is at the helm of this second trilogy based on the work of JRR Tolkien. The opening chapter follows Gandalf (Sir Ian McKellen) and Bilbo Baggins (Martin Freeman) as they join a 13-strong company of dwarves on a quest to reclaim stolen gold from the dragon Smaug. With cinematographer Andrew Leslie, composer Howard Shore and the visual effects wizards at WETA back on board, An Unexpected Journey should dazzle the senses, especially in IMAX 3D. Damon Smith A finished cut wasn’t available as Scout went to press.

Tinker Bell and the Secret of the Wings 3D (U)

Were it not for the introduction of 3D, this fourth computeranimated feature based on JM Barrie’s scantily clad fairy would surely have fluttered straight to DVD. The Secret Of The Wings begins in Pixie Hollow where Tinker Bell (voiced by Mae Whitman) and her friends gather berries and coax flowers to bloom. When the time comes for the animals to cross into Winter Woods, Tinker Bell ignores fairy law and investigates the snowbound kingdom where she discovers she has a sister called Periwinkle (Lucy Hale). The plot is as flimsy as one of Tink’s wings and the animation merely competent, but this sweet yet slight adventure has its heart in the right place. Unlike the fairies, though, the film never soars. DS

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Also showing

What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (12A)

Clapham Picturehouse 20th anniversary

Sisters, such demented sisters… French & Saunders’ spoof of this seminal 1962 psychological thriller, based on the novel by Henry Farrell, was a wicked delight. However, nothing compares to the murderous glares of Bette Davis and Joan Crawford as sisters Jane and Blanche Hudson, both former film stars, whose sibling rivalry mushrooms to deadly extremes in the claustrophobic confines of their shared residence. Artfully scripted tensions between the two actresses continued off camera, with rumours of Davis kicking Crawford in the head. How director Robert Aldrich managed to keep the peace is a miracle. On screen, at least, the enmity and betrayal is masterfully orchestrated, building to a haunting crescendo and Jane’s lament, “You mean all this time we could have been friends?” Enjoy the battles again when the film is re-released on December 14.

Twenty years ago this week, Clapham Picturehouse opened its doors for the first time, wooing south Londoners with a mix of mainstream blockbusters and arthouse fare. That first week, the venue served up the hijinks of Home Alone 2 alongside Marc Caro and Jean-Pierre Jeunet’s exquisite black comedy Delicatessen. To celebrate its anniversary, the cinema turns back the clock, screening a series of films from that bygone age at 1992 prices. Wayne’s World creaks with age on Dec 10, followed by Woody Allen’s contemplative comedy Husbands And Wives (Dec 11) and Sam Raimi’s blood-soaked conclusion to his Evil Dead trilogy, Army Of Darkness (Dec 12). Festivities conclude on Dec 13 with Baz Luhrmann’s rags-to-sequins fairytale, Strictly Ballroom, pairing Paul Mercurio and Tara Morice.

It’s a Wonderful Life (U)

The Karate Kid (15)

Forget The Queen’s Speech, family squabbles, turkey and trimmings… Christmas just wouldn’t be the same without Frank Capra’s lifeaffirming 1946 fable. James Stewart stars as suicidal family man George Bailey, who ponders life without his beloved wife Mary (Donna Reed) and children, but is thankfully saved by guardian angel Clarence (Henry Travers). “You see George, you’ve really had a wonderful life,” says the spirit, “Don’t you see what a mistake it would be to just throw it away?” It’s A Wonderful Life is the perfect festive treat. Stewart, as the suicidal father who is dragged back from the brink by the angel, has never been better, and the direction and pacing throughout is flawless, spreading tidings of comfort and joy.

While John Hughes chronicled growing pains in the 1980s with pithy comedy and sugary romance, director John G Avildsen opted for roundhouse kicks and punches in The Karate Kid, a classic comingof-age story peppered with surprisingly brutal fight sequences. Ralph Macchio turns back the clock 10 years to play high school student Daniel LaRusso, who is bullied mercilessly by classmate Johnny Lawrence (William Zabka) but learns to fight back with tutelage from Mr Miyagi (Pat Morita). The training sequences are legendary, galvanised by winning screen chemistry between Macchio and Morita. The climactic final showdown still packs a punch. Never forget: “Wax on, wax off”.

Dec 14-Jan 3, times vary, £5-£10 mems £5-£8.50. BFI Southbank, Belvedere Road, SE1 8XT Waterloo

Dec 11, 8.45pm, The Prince Charles Cinema, 7 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BY Leicester Square

Dec 10-13, 6.30pm, £5. Clapham Picturehouse, 76 Venn Street, SW4 0AT Clapham Common

scoutlondon.com Scout London 37

From Twilight to Downton Swedish actress MyAnna Buring tops off a brilliant year with three major festive TV roles. Rachael Popow finds out more

It seems like 2012 has been an amazing year for you… Yes, I’ve been so, so lucky – I keep saying it, but I really do mean it. A couple of years ago I was a jobbing actress, but I was also working in call centres. But now I’m able to do a job that I absolutely love, and make a living out of it. 38 Scout London scoutlondon.com

How would you describe Poison Tree? It’s a suspense story about my character Karen, a strait-laced young woman who moves to London in the late 1990s to study. There she meets two people who change her life forever. It’s a story about lies – the lies we tell ourselves and the lies we tell people around us, and whether we can ever excuse them even though we might be able to explain them. Are you drawn to darker roles, or has it just worked out that way? A bit of both. I love characters that have depth to them – they’re really exciting to play – but I’ve also been lucky in the last couple of years to have been offered meatier parts. What do you consider to be your breakthrough role? There are two jobs that changed things for me – one is Kill List, the film I did with Ben Wheatley a couple of years ago, and then Twilight. The two films came out around the same time, and they were so vastly different – one was an independent, psychological thriller with incredibly real

characters, and the other was a huge vampire saga. The two coming out together threw open a lot of doors for me. All the hype and publicity around the final Twilight film must have felt quite foreign... Yes! The premieres are extraordinary, I’ve never been at any event that felt so electric and alive, it’s quite mind-blowing. It seems silly, but when you’re there it’s quite overwhelming and you just realise how many people care about these stories – they really matter. What can you tell us about your role in the Downton Abbey Christmas special? I’m going to play Edna the maid, and unfortunately that’s all I can say. But here’s another saga that has exploded into the lives and imaginations of people all around the world, and I get to be a part of it. What a privilege! And it’s one of the warmest, funniest sets I’ve ever walked onto. You’ll also be appearing in Ripper Street. Tell us about that. Ripper Street was great fun. It’s a cop drama set in the late 1800s,

and I play a very strong woman called Long Susan, who runs a brothel. She’s very feisty and is not to be messed with – she’s more than happy to take the law into her own hands if needs be. I got to wear the most amazing costumes, and corsets, which I’ve developed a love-hate relationship with. Anything nice planned for Christmas? Normally I go to Oman for Christmas, so I usually celebrate in the desert, but this year I’m going to celebrate in London, and I’m bringing my family over and we’re going to celebrate Swedish Christmas on December 24. I’m going to cook up a Swedish dinner with all the trimmings. Then on the 25th we’re all heading over to a friend’s house and having an English Christmas with them. We’re going to be very fat and happy this Christmas! The Poison Tree, starts December 10, ITV1; Ripper Street, starts December 30, BBC1; Downton Abbey, Christmas Day at 8.45pm, ITV1

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hen MyAnna Buring was working as a glass collector in a pub in Sweden, having quit school to become an actress, little did she know that 10 years later she’d be one of the hottest tickets around. The 27-year-old actress, whose looks are pure Scandi stereotype, is now majorly in-demand after appearing in Paula Milne’s BBC drama White Heat, acclaimed British horror films Kill List and The Descent, and blockbusting vampire franchise Twilight. Buring is certainly having a moment. Before the end of this year, in fact, she’ll be seen in ITV1 drama The Poison Tree, new BBC series Ripper Street, and the Downton Abbey Christmas special. We quiz her about all the above.

Ice Age 4: Continental Drift (U)

Available on DVD, Blu-ray and download

Directed with vim by Steve Martino and Michael Thurmeier, Ice Age 4: Continental Drift is a colourful computer-animated romp with a generous glaze of mawkish sentiment to hammer home the importance of the family unit in times of emotional upheaval. There are moments when screenwriters Michael Berg and Jason Fuchs seem to run short of ideas and are happy to tread water before the next rollicking set piece. Thankfully, the running time is trim so lulls are brief and flickers of boredom are invariably quenched by riotous interludes involving accident-prone sabre-toothed squirrel Scrat, and his never-ending quest for his beloved acorns. DS

The Expendables 2 (15)

Harry & Paul Series Four (15)

Available as DVD box set Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse poke fun at Oscar-winning film The King’s Speech, slow-burning thriller Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy and even Question Time in the latest series of their BAFTA award-winning character-based sketch show. Gags hit the target almost as often as they miss. Some of the characterisation also seems a tad weak and politically incorrect in the most old-fashioned sense, embracing racial and social stereotypes with gusto. DS

Keith Lemon: The Film (18)

Available on DVD, Blu-ray and download

Laden with ruder, cruder scenes that were never shown at the cinema, Keith Lemon: The Film lacks a single redeeming feature. The wooden cast can barely conceal their embarrassment while the perfunctory, ramshackle plot wallows knee-deep in puerility. The 81 minutes of this festering cinematic canker feels like an eternity and anything but “bang tidy”. DS

Available on DVD, Blu-ray and download The boys are back in town for The Expendables 2, which shoehorns most of the muscle-bound icons of the action movie genre into one ludicrous, testosterone-fuelled adventure. Simon West’s explosive sequel makes little sense and offers no apologies for the flimsy plot, bombarding the screen with a succession of ripsnorting action set pieces which include Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis zigzagging through a gun battle inside a cramped Smart car and an overblown hand-to-hand fight between Sylvester Stallone and Jean-Claude Van Damme. DS

Enjoy! Karaoke

Available on Facebook

As with most things these days, karaoke now has a social networking element, in the form of this Facebookbased game app. ‘Pitch detection’ function enables you to hone your singing skills, and the ‘Sing Battle’ feature means you can compare your performances with your friends. There are old-time classics and recent chart hits. Having a go is free but upgrading costs a few pounds. Abi Jackson

Don’t miss your chance to win with Scout London has teamed-up with Netflix, the world’s leading Internet subscription service for enjoying films and TV shows, to give one lucky reader the chance to win a one year subscription and a 32in Samsung Full HD LED TV with Freeview and built in Netflix so you can instantly watch hours of great entertainment.

Simply answer the following question: Eli Roth directed Netflix Original Series House of Cards due for release 2013. Which other titles has he previously directed? A) Hostel B) Motel C) Tavern

To enter text SCOUT FLIX and your answer to 88010 Texts cost £1*, also enter at scoutlondon.com/netflix * see Terms & Conditions on p55

scoutlondon.com Scout London 39

No longer party people The Happy Mondays are back, but their partying days are behind them all – except one, as singer Rowetta Idah tells Laura Martin

f you spend a lot of your time hanging out with the Happy Mondays, you quickly learn how to look after yourself – firstly by finding a way to avoid at least some of their infamous afterparties. Singer Rowetta Idah, who was with the band through their hedonistic heyday and rejoined this year, says she still has a few self-preservation techniques up her sleeve. “I usually put my pyjamas on straight away,” she says. “It stops me going to parties with Bez.” But the band’s behaviour is considerably less wild than it used to be, according to 46-year-old Idah, who was also a finalist on X Factor in 2004. Back in the early 90s they were one of the most notoriously hard-living bands of the Mad Chester scene (the drug stories

40 Scout London scoutlondon.com

that surround the band are some of the most famous in all rock’n’roll folklore – including Bez dripping acid in a cut on his forehead from a stage injury just for the LOLs). But Idah says those days are behind them now. “Most of them don’t bother with the partying now,” she says. “Some of the guys might have a Red Bull. It’s just really tame – a lot of them want to get back to their families. Shaun [Ryder] usually goes back home

to his wife and kids. There are no arguments and everyone’s fresh to go the next day.” But there’s still one band member for whom old habits die hard – no prizes for guessing. “Bez still parties,” reveals Idah, “but it’s definitely not like it used to be.” Whatever happens after the shows, the recently-reformed band seem to have as much onstage energy as ever. Which is good news for the fans who’ll be flocking to their two shows at The Roundhouse next week. Having formed all the way back in 1980, the Mondays rose to

prominence with seminal albums Bummed (1988) and the 1990 classic Pills ‘n’ Thrills and Bellyaches. They are now on their fourth incarnation. And though they have an impressive back catalogue to mine, Idah says their Roundhouse shows won’t just rely on past glories. “We’ve been writing some new songs, we’re going to have a new single or album out maybe in April or May,” she reveals. “We’ve got nine or 10 almost-finished tracks already. We’ve been in the studio for six weeks and it’s great.” Another thing the band haven’t lost in those hazy decades is their sharp sense of humour. “The name of the new album will be down to Shaun. I’ve heard things like ‘Designer Vagina’ as the working title. Whatever it is, it will put a smile on people’s faces. “It feels like Pills ’n’ Thrills and Bellyaches. I remember when we were doing that album, we got such a massive rush when we were writing and recording it, and it’s feeling like that again, just without all the drugs. It’s brilliant.” Happy Mondays, December 19 & 20, The Roundhouse, roundhouse.org.uk

A new beginning When their influential guitarist quit, Editors went through a turbulent 12 months. Singer Tom Smith tells Chris Beanland how they coped

he title of Editors’ second album, An End Has A Start, is one way some might have described the band’s life in recent years. They’ve been through turbulent times, and haven’t released an album since 2009’s In This Light And On This Evening – mainly due to guitarist Chris Urbanowicz quitting in April. Urbanowicz – who was responsible for the smoky, lustrous sound that made debut album The Back Room so vital and so gloomy at the same time – had been one of Editors’ most defining elements. So without him and his Joy Division obsession, it’s obviously a very different band. “I don’t think his heart was in the same place,” singer Tom Smith tells Scout London in his thoughtful, well-spoken manner. “We’ve been through a bit of a journey, especially with the last year. But first and foremost, Chris was a mate.” Indeed, but he was also integral to your sound as a band. “We were mates first, so there was the personal side of it. But you’re right that he was an integral part of those records. On our last

record he led the way on having no guitars. But I don’t think his heart was really in the same place as where us three were really. It kind of fell apart this year. It’s really sad but it does happen.” The 31-year-old sighs, and adds: “It’s been a long two years, especially this last year. But we’re gonna come back fighting.” They are indeed. The band have a new lineup and are writing a new album. “It’s a rock record – the songs are about the harder side of love,” he explains. But without Urbanowicz, the new album could see Editors abandoning some of the epic melancholy that made their name. Smith has taken his cues for the new material from “Arcade Fire and Springsteen – I’ve been banging on for years about American alt. rock, about how much I love REM. But the last album was, to us at

least, experimental. This one will be immediate, more uncomplicated.” To that end, the band will be decamping to Nashville, Tennessee, to record it at the start of next year. But not before they play Xfm’s annual Winter Wonderland shindig in Brixton next week. “It feels like the right time to put our heads up now for the Christmas bash and say ‘hello’ before we go off and make the [new] record,” smiles Smith, who lives in Gospel Oak with his wife, DJ Edith Bowman, and their son Rudy. After a tumultuous year, Smith insists the band have come out stronger. “We’ve got two new members, and off the back of all that we did some hard graft and now we’ve got a lot of new songs – we played three new ones in Belgium at Rock Werchter festival earlier this year and we’ll be playing two more new ones at the Winter Wonderland show.”

66 We’ve been through a bit of a journey in the last year 99

Perhaps never appreciated to the degree they deserved in their homeland (despite a Mercury nod for debut The Back Room in 2006), mainland Europe has always embraced Editors as a ‘big deal’. Indeed, they’re booked for main stage festival shows just beneath the likes of Kings of Leon and Depeche Mode at bashes from Bilbao to Barcelona next summer. “It’s a dream to see your name on the posters – and we always felt that mainland Europe were getting it,” admits Smith. “European audiences seem to like music with a darker thread – Placebo, Muse, they all go down well too.” But before all that, the next stop is Brixton. “It’s going to be a party gig, so don’t worry – as well as the new songs, we’ll be playing our greatest hits too,” Smith reassures us. While the end of one phase in the band’s career may now be over, the start of their next chapter is clearly only just beginning. Xfm’s Winter Wonderland also stars The Courteeners, Temper Trap and more, December 17, O2 Academy Brixton, xfm.co.uk scoutlondon.com Scout London 41

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NEW YEAR’S EVE PARTY

MICA PARIS + DJ JAZZIE B

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ROY 8, 9 & 10 JAN AYERS BRIAN MCKNIGHT 20, 21, 22 & 23 JAN INCOGNITO 25 & 26 JAN JON JOCELYN BROWN 14, 15 & 16 FEB ORELSAN 19 FEB JON SHLOMO & THE LIP FACTORY 21 & 22 FEB T I C K E T S A V A I L A B L E F R O M W W W. J A Z Z C A F E . C O . U K

42 Scout London scoutlondon.com

The Black Keys

December 12 & 13, The O2, £30

It’s taken almost 10 years but finally The Black Keys are getting the attention they deserve. Having trekked round smaller clubs for longer than is probably fair for a band of such talent, the duo are now making the longoverdue leap to arenas.

Some purists might fear a loss of intimacy, but the epic bluesrock sound of seventh and most recent album El Camino should suit the big spaces well. Festival performances have shown Dan Auerbach and Patrick Carney can easily hold their

Also this week: Action Bronson Dec 16, The Garage, £14.50 Brand New Heavies Dec 10, The Jazz Cafe, £25 Death In June Dec 15, Electrowerkz, adv £15 Dodgy Dec 14, O2 Academy Islington, £17.50 Dreadzone Dec 13, The Garage, £15 Ellie Goulding Dec 12, O2 Academy Brixton, £25 Enter Shikari, Cancer Bats, EngineEarz Experiment Dec 16 & Dec 17, Roundhouse, adv £20 Friendly Fires, Cheatahs, Mat Horne Dec 12, XOYO, £20 Imperial Leisure Dec 14, Surya, adv £10 Lawnmower Deth, Beholder Dec 15, The Garage, £15 Lemar Dec 15, IndigO2, £19.50-£45 Los Campesinos!, Among Brothers, Sparky Deathcap Dec 15, Islington Town Hall, £15 Madness Dec 14 & Dec 22, The O2 Arena, £29.50-£47.50 Mika Dec 13, Roundhouse, £25 Mumford And Sons Dec 11 & Dec 18, The O2 Arena, £29.50-£32.50

Neville Staple From The Specials Dec 14, The Albany, £12-£16 Polar Bear Dec 15, Rich Mix, £11 Saint Etienne Dec 14, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £22.50 Scroobius Pip, Kate Tempest, Brian Gittins Dec 10, The Garage, £12 Speech Debelle Dec 13, The Jazz Cafe, £10 The Damned Dec 15, Roundhouse, £20 The Hives, The Minutes, The Cesarians Dec 14, Roundhouse, £18.50

Dot Rotten, Rascals, Tom Prior Dec 11, Proud Camden, £6, w/flyer £5 after10.30pm

Danny Clinch

BETTYE LAVETTE 11 DEC THE BLOCKHEADS 14 & 15 DEC JON B 17 & 18 DEC JON MARTHA REEVES & THE VANDELLAS 19 & 20 DEC LONDON COMMUNITY GOSPEL CHOIR 21 & 22 DEC JANET KAY & CARROLL THOMPSON 28 & 29 DEC

Scout Stereo

Friends Va Fan Gör Du

Kermit Ruffins and The Rebirth Brass Band I Got a Woman

Another spikey sing-along from the Brooklyn hipsters

A New Orleans helping of this Ray Charles classic

Puppini Sisters & Friends own before crowds of tens of thousands, and anthems – such as the thunderous Lonely Boy – will no doubt inspire some rousing sing-alongs. Peninsula Square, SE10 0DX North Greenwich

December 14, Cadogan Hall, £25 and £35 Join the retro vocal trio in a trip through some of the most classic Christmas songs of the swing era. From Bing Crosby to Mariah Carey and Eartha Kitt, the harmony group will be putting their own spin on Chrimbo classics. 5 Sloane Terrace SW1X 9DQ

Sloane Square

Girls Aloud Something new

John Talabot When The Past Was Present (Pachanga Boys Purple Remix)

How did this not make it to No.1?

This one’s all about the bassline – listen with headphones

Tim Minchin White Wine in the Sun Honest, tender and surprisingly moving; possibly the best Christmas song of recent years

Listen to our playlist: j.mp/scout0020

The xx Electric Six

aliya naumoff

December 15, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £15

They wanna take you to a gay bar, y’know. Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8TT Shepherd’s Bush

December 16, O2 Academy Brixton, £25 For all their shyness and dark, understated sounds, The xx are one of the most feverishly-admired acts to have come out of London in the past few years. In the wake of Jamie Smith’s prolific remix and producing side-career as Jamie xx, the band’s well-received second album, Coexist, will be getting a proper airing on this tour, including at this hotly-anticipated homecoming date. Stockwell Road, SW9 9SL

Brixton

Gentleman’s Dub Club

December 13, XOYO, £10

There’s nothing very gentlemanly about this monstrously bass-y nine-piece, who blend ska, dub, dubstep and roots into a whirlwind of a show. Join the club and get ready to shake your brass. 32-37 Cowper Street, EC2A 4AP Old Street scoutlondon.com Scout London 43

BOO K ING A H E A D ABC Dec 18, Theatre Royal, Drury Lane, £35-£75 Alicia Keys May 30, The O2, £39.50 & £45 Alt-J Jan 18 & Jan 19, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £14 and May 16, O2 Academy Brixton, £16 Amon Tobin Mar 8, Hammersmith Apollo, £35 Amy MacDonald Mar 3, London Palladium, phone for prices Asia Dec 22, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £22.50 Athlete May 10, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, adv £21.50 Bad Manners Dec 21, 229 The Venue, £20

Bloc Party, The Joy Formidable, Old Men Feb 22, Earls Court, adv £29.50 Bastille Mar 28 & Mar 29, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, adv £13 Beach House Mar 25 & Mar 26, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £18 Biffy Clyro Apr 3, The O2, £26.50 & £29.50 Bill Bailey Dec 18, Hammersmith Apollo, £25 Black Rebel Motorcycle Club Mar 27, O2 Academy Brixton, £22.50 Blood Red Shoes, Rolo Tomassi, Wet Nuns Jan 22, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £13.50 Bound By Exile Jan 11, The Black Heart, phone for prices Brian May And Kerry Ellis May 1, Royal Albert Hall, phone for prices Bryan Ferry Nov 4, Royal Albert Hall, £35-£95 Bullet For My Valentine, Halestorm Mar 17, Roundhouse, £20 Caravan Jan 8, Southbank Centre, £25, concs £12.50 Carlos Nunez And Philip Pickett & Musicians Of The Globe Feb 1, Southbank Centre, £15-£30, concs £7.50-£15 Chali 2na, Roc Jan 24, The Jazz Cafe, phone for prices Chris De Burgh Apr 24, Royal Albert Hall, £35-£50 Clannad Mar 20, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £32.50 Cleo Laine Mar 6, Millfield Arts Centre, £26, adv £25 Clutch Jan 22, KOKO, £15 Cody Simpson Mar 1, IndigO2, £17.50 Courtney Pine Dec 23, The Hideaway, £25 Cradle Of Filth Dec 19, The Forum, £15 Crystal Fighters May 23, KOKO, £14 Cuban Combination Dec 27, Floridita, £10 Cult Of Luna Jan 22, The Garage, £15 D-A-D Mar 2, O2 Academy Islington, adv £15

44 Scout London scoutlondon.com

Danny & The Champions Of The World, The Lucky Strikes, The Dreaming Spires, Trevor Moss & Hannah-Lou, Case Hardin Dec 21, The Windmill, £7 Dappy Dec 20, Hammersmith Apollo, £18.50 Death Grips May 2, The Forum, £15 Deftones, Letlive, Three Trapped Tigers Feb 20, O2 Academy Brixton, £28.50 Depeche Mode May 28 & May 29, The O2, £40 & £50 Dizzy Gillespie Afro-Cuban Experience Feb 8 & Feb 9, Ronnie Scott’s, £25-£45 Django Django Dec 21, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £15 Dog Is Dead Mar 6, KOKO, adv £11.50 Don Broco Feb 21, The Underworld, adv £9 Dropkick Murphys, Crowns Jan 18 & 19, The Forum, £21 Duke Special Dec 20, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £15 Ed Harcourt Dec 19, Cecil Sharp House, £18.50 Editors, The Courteeners, The Temper Trap, Lucy Rose, Theme Park Dec 17, O2 Academy Brixton, adv £25 Edwyn Collins Apr 24, Union Chapel, £25 Eels Mar 21, O2 Academy Brixton, phone for prices Elvis Costello & The Imposters Jun 4 & Jun 5, Royal Albert Hall, £45 Emeli Sande Apr 8, Hammersmith Apollo, £25-£29.50 Emmy The Great And Tim Wheeler Dec 20, The Scala, £16.50 Enter Shikari, Cancer Bats, Engine-Earz Experiment Dec 16 & Dec 17, Roundhouse, adv £20 Eric Clapton May 17, May 18, May 20, May 21, May 23, Royal Albert Hall, £70 & £85 Esben And The Witch Feb 26, The Scala, adv £10 Example Feb 23, Earls Court, £28.50 FM Mar 23, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £18.50 Fairport Convention May 10, The Borderline, £24 Fairport Convention Mar 9, Union Chapel, adv £25 Fear Factory, Textures, Sacred Mother Tounge Dec 18, KOKO, phone for prices Finley Quaye, The Mercenaries Feb 28, The Scala, £19.50, adv £12.50 & £15.50 Four Tet Feb 28, Heaven, £15.50 Frank Hamilton, Mark Grist Dec 20, The Barfly, Camden, £6 Frankie Cocozza Dec 19, O2 Academy Islington, £10

Foals, Efterklang Mar 28, Royal Albert Hall, £10-£25

Classical

Il Divo And Katherine Jenkins Apr 19, The O2 Arena, £35-£95 Maroon 5 Jun 23 & 24, The O2, £40 & £45 Freedom From Torture Presents: Bombay Bicycle Club, Dan Croll, Trophy Wife Dec 22, KOKO, adv £20 Fun Apr 12, Hammersmith Apollo, £18.50 Funeral For A Friend Feb 18, The Garage, £16 Gabby Young And Other Animals Mar 16, The Garage, £12 Gary Barlow Dec 27, Hammersmith Apollo, £35 & £65, phone for availability Gary Barlow Jan 16, Hammersmith Apollo, £35 & £65, phone for availability George Thorogood & The Destroyers Jun 21, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £34£35.50 Georgie Fame And The Blue Flames, Ray Gelato Giants Dec 31, Ronnie Scott’s, £225-£275 Girls Aloud Mar 1-3, The O2, £42.50£49.50 Glen Matlock And The Philistines, Spizz, Ed Tudorpole, London, Night Of Treason, The Duel, Tv Smith Dec 23, 100 Club, adv £30 Gwyneth Herbert Jan 27, 606 Club, £10 Happy Mondays Dec 19 & Dec 20, Roundhouse, adv £32.50 Helloween Apr 16, The Forum, adv £25 Hit Factory Live Christmas Cracker Dec 21, The O2, £49.50 I Am Kloot Feb 19, Barbican Centre, £25 Inspiral Carpets Mar 22, KOKO, phone for prices JLS Dec 21, The O2, £25 & £33.50 Jaguar Skills Mar 23, KOKO, £15 Jake Bugg Feb 27 & Feb 28, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, phone for prices James Last: One More Time Apr 26 & Apr 27, Royal Albert Hall, £35-£60 James Taylor Quartet Dec 22, Islington Town Hall, £30 James Yorkston, Geese Dec 19, Shacklewell Arms, adv £12.50 James, Echo And The Bunnymen Apr 19 & Apr 20, O2 Academy Brixton, £38.50 Jamie Lidell Mar 8, Heaven, adv £16 Janet Devlin Apr 6, O2 Academy Islington, phone for prices Jessie J Mar 9 & Mar 10, The O2, £25 & £33.50 Jessie Ware Mar 13 & Mar 14, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £16.50 Joe Satriani Jun 17, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £40

Aled Jones May 12, Union Chapel, adv £35 Alfie Boe: Storyteller Apr 8 & Apr 9, Royal Albert Hall, £25-£45 Andre Rieu, Johann Strauss Orchestra Dec 16, Dec 17, The O2 Arena, £40-£90 BBC Symphony Orchestra Nov 10, Royal Albert Hall, £8-£36 King’s College Choir/Philharmonia Chorus/Philharmonia Orchestra Dec 19, Royal Albert Hall, £12.50£49.50 Natalia Strelchenko And Moscow Chamber Music Academy Dec 21, Wigmore Hall, £10-£22 Only Boys Aloud Apr 6, Cadogan Hall, £19.50-£27.50

Orchestra Of Welsh National Opera: The Snowman/Peter And The Wolf Dec 22 & 23, Barbican Centre, £25, concs £12.50 Oxford Baroque/Members Of The English Cornett/Sackbut Ensemble Dec 18, St John’s, Smith Square, £10-£25, mems £9-£22.50 Polyphony/Orchestra Of The Age Of Enlightenment Dec 23, St John’s, Smith Square, £19-£50, mems £17.10-£45 Spitalfields Music Winter Festival 2012: The English Concert Dec 17, Christ Church Spitalfields, £5-£32 The Mediaeval Baebes Dec 21, St Sepulchre-Without-Newgate, adv £17.50 Trio A Piacere Feb 8, St Barnabas Millennium Hall, FREE, donations welcome Victoria Simonsen Apr 5, St Barnabas Millennium Hall, FREE, donations welcome Vivamus Choir Dec 22, St James’s Church, £16, concs £10 Westminster Cathedral Choir And Orchestra Dec 19, Westminster Cathedral, £10-£40

Roger Waters: The Wall Sep 14, Wembley Stadium, £60 & £70 John Mayall Dec 17, Leicester Square Theatre, £25 Journey/Whitesnake, Thunder May 29, Wembley Arena, £48 Justin Bieber Mar 4, Mar 5, Mar 7, Mar 8, The O2, £50 & £60 Kaiser Chiefs Mar 1, O2 Academy Brixton, adv £27.50 Lawson Mar 1, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £15.50 Lee Scratch Perry Feb 9 & Feb 10, The Jazz Cafe, £22.50 Leona Lewis May 8 & May 9, Royal Albert Hall, £35-£65 Lianne La Havas, Rae Morris, George Ezra Mar 11 & Mar 12, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £15 Little Feat Feb 8, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £30-£32.50 Little Mix Feb 13, Hammersmith Apollo, £19.50-£32.50 London A Cappella Festival : The Magnets Jan 25, Kings Place, £9.50£34.50 London International Ska Festival 2013 Mar 28-Mar 31, Various Venues, weekend ticket £99.99 Macy Gray Dec 20, KOKO, £30 Madness Dec 14 & Dec 22, The O2, £29.50-£47.50 Marlena Shaw Mar 26-Mar 30, Ronnie Scott’s, £30-£50 Mica Paris, Nathan Watson Dec 31, The Jazz Cafe, £45 Modestep Feb 14, KOKO, £14 Mumford And Sons Dec 11 & Dec 18, The O2, £29.50-£32.50 Mumiy Troll May 25, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £20 Muse May 25 & May 26, Emirates Stadium, phone for prices Nas Mar 19, The O2, £34-£39, w/CD £44.99-£49.99 Netsky Mar 1, The Forum, £15 Of Monsters And Men Mar 5-Mar 7, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, phone for prices Olivia Newton-John Mar 13, Royal Albert Hall, £45 & £55 Olly Murs Mar 29 & Mar 30, The O2, £34 Olly Murs Mar 10, Wembley Arena, £34

One Direction Feb 22-25, & Apr 1, Apr 2, Apr 4, Apr 5, The O2, £25 & £33.50 Ooberfuse Jan 10, Archangel, FREE P!nk Apr 24-28, The O2, £42.50-£55 Paloma Faith Feb 7, Hammersmith Apollo, £22.50-£29.50 Plan B, Labrinth, Rudimental Feb 9, The O2, £30 Republica Mar 14, The Garage, £14 Richard Hawley Feb 23, Troxy, £22.50 Robbie Williams, Olly Murs Jun 29 & 30, Wembley Stadium, £55-£99 Ron Pope Jan 4, KOKO, £15 Ron Sexsmith Mar 7, Royal Albert Hall, £22.50-£32.50 Ronan Keating: Fires Tour Jan 26, The O2, £35 Sigur Ros Mar 7-9, O2 Academy Brixton, £30 Sinead O’Connor Mar 27, Barbican Centre, £18-£25 Sinead O’Connor Jan 17, LSO St Luke’s, £20-£30 Squarepusher Mar 30, Roundhouse, £25 Stereophonics, Gaz Coombes Dec 20, Troxy, phone for prices Stornoway Mar 27, The Forum, £15 The Crazy World Of Arthur Brown Mar 29, The Borderline, £19.50 The Darkness Mar 7, Hammersmith Apollo, £27.50 The Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster Apr 12, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £15 The Flaming Lips May 20 & May 21, Roundhouse, £32 The Gaslight Anthem Mar 29 & Mar 30, Troxy, £23.50 The Killers Jun 22, Wembley Stadium, £35-£85 The Pogues, Frank Turner And The Sleeping Souls Dec 20, The O2, £45 The Prodigy Dec 18-Dec 20, O2 Academy Brixton, £45 The Script Mar 22 & Mar 23, The O2, £29.50 The Stone Roses Jun 7 & Jun 8, Finsbury Park, £55 The Wonder Stuff, Pop Will Eat Itself, Jesus Jones Dec 19, O2 Shepherd’s Bush Empire, £20 The X Factor Live Tour 2013 Feb 7, The O2, £32.50 The X Factor Live Tour 2013 Feb 22, Feb 23, Wembley Arena, £32.50 Trey Songz Jan 30 & Jan 31, Hammersmith Apollo, £30 & £35 Two Door Cinema Club Feb 8, O2 Academy Brixton, £16.50, phone for availability Villagers Feb 20, Village Underground, £14 Wave Machines Feb 6, The Scala, adv £9 Wiley, Skepta, JME Apr 20, The Forum, £14.50 Willy Mason Mar 7, KOKO, phone for prices Woodkid May 14, Roundhouse, £20 World Service Project Jan 30, Monto Water Rats, £5 Yellowcard Feb 26, KOKO, phone for prices Yo La Tengo Mar 20, Barbican Centre, £15 Yolanda Brown Mar 14, Millfield Arts Centre, £20, adv £19, concs £17, adv concs £16 Zappatika Mar 9, Bridgehouse 2, phone for prices

C L UBBING Monday December 10

Wednesday December 12

The Doctor’s Orders Present: Murs & Fashawn, Mr Thing, Spin Doctor, Chris P Cuts at Cargo, 83 Rivington Street, EC2A 3AY Old Street £12, 8pm12midnight. The Californian duo play sounds from their recent collaboration. Also appearing will be British producer Mr Thing, DJ Spin Doctor and Chris P Cuts. It’s Britney Bitch! at The Shadow Lounge, 5-7 Brewer Street, W1F 0RF Leicester Square £5, 10pm-3am. DJ Tuomo Fox and special guests spin pop, R&B and chart hits under the watchful eye of MC Patrick Lilley. Popcorn at Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers Street, WC2N 6NG Charing Cross £8, £4 before 12midnight, 11pm-5.30am. Resident DJs play dance, electro, R’n’B, pop and hip hop. Stampede at Escape Bar, 10A Brewer Street, W1F 0SU Piccadilly Circus £5, £3 before 1am, £1 before 11am, FREE before 10pm, 9pm-3am. DJ Laurence Rene spins pop-punk, alternative, rock and ska, with hosts Oli Sandler and Matt Boland.

Death 2 Disco at Notting Hill Arts Club, 21 Notting Hill Gate, W11 3JQ Notting Hill Gate £3, FREE before 8pm, 7pm-2am. Resident DJs Danny Watson, Nigel Thomas and BlagSound DJs spin indie and rock with live performances. Deviation Christmas Session: Benji B, MC Judah at Concrete, The Tea Building, 56 Shoreditch High Street, E1 6JJ Shoreditch High Street £7, early bird £5, 9pm-2am. MC Judah hosts this seasonal night of dubstep, hip hop and more, featuring the British DJ and producer. Gigolo at The Shadow Lounge, 5-7 Brewer Street, W1F 0RF Leicester Square concs £5, 10pm-3am. Guys with attitude party to house, pop and disco, hosted by international porn stars. Les Femmes sur le Ponte at Bar Vinyl, 6 Inverness Street, NW1 7HJ Camden Town FREE, 8pm-late. Resident DJs play house. Mmoths at Shacklewell Arms, 71 Shacklewell Lane, E8 2EB Dalston Kingsland £5, 8pm. DJs Minotaur Shock, Mr Mafro and Clash DJs spin electro and alternative, with a live performance from the Newbridge-based musician and producer Jack Colleran. XXL Wednesdays at Pulse, 1-4 Invicta Plaza, SE1 9UF Blackfriars £3, mems FREE, annual m’ship £10, 10pm-3am. DJs Christian M and Alex Logan play funky house in the main room, while Joe Egg spins retro in the Fluff Bar.

Tuesday December 11 Chop Suey at Proud Camden, The Horse Hospital, Chalk Farm Road, NW1 8AH Camden Town £3, £1 before 10pm, 7.30pm. Martisau and Phaze One spin hip hop and R&B. Club Roots Underground at Orleans, 259-261 Seven Sisters Road, N4 2HZ Finsbury Park £6, 10.30pm-3.30am. Reggae and ska courtesy of Sista Millie,

Dropped at Rattlesnake Of Angel, 56 Upper Street, N1 0NY Angel £5, 7.30pm1am. An appearance by The World’s Greatest Ghetto Blaster, playing music of technology of the 1980s. International Machine Orchestra offer sounds based on artist Rachel Whiteread’s abandoned spaces, and Brazilian and Spanish guest DJs complete the line-up. Word Sound Power, King Alpha, Benjie Roots and Rim Bim. Huw Stephens’ Christmas Party at The Social, 5 Little Portland Street, W1W 7JD Oxford Circus FREE, 12midnight-late. The Radio 1 DJ spins electronic music with DJ Felson plus new live bands and MCs. Queerly Out Shots at Escape Bar, 10A Brewer Street, W1F 0SU Piccadilly Circus FREE, 9pm-3am. DJ Julio Bravo spins power pop, disco, 1980s, R&B, old skool, Motown and hip hop.

Thursday December 13 Bass Face at The Rhythm Factory, 16-18 Whitechapel Road, E1 1EW Whitechapel £10, guestlist £7, 10pm3am. Dubstep, drum’n’bass, funky and grime courtesy of Brown and Gammon, Lena Cullen, Spooky and Gloeasy, with DJ Shorty, DJ Halo and Glacier. Bruk Out Christmas Special at The Big Chill House, 257-259 Pentonville Road, N1 9NL King’s Cross St Pancras phone for prices, 8pm-2am. Robbo Ranx, Nasty McQuaid and Mangno spin dubstep, hip hop, R&B and grime, with performances from XO Man and Wavy Spice. HU$TLR$: Members Night at The Shadow Lounge, 5-7 Brewer Street, W1F 0RF Leicester Square £5, mems FREE, 10pm-3am. DJs Miswhite, Doug Silva and Paul Heron supply party tunes, cheese and dance vibes. Lemteks Christmas In The Jungle at The Silver Bullet, 5 Station Place, N4 2DH Finsbury Park FREE, 10pmlate. DJs Raggamuffin, Sargy, Dirty Rat Child, Warrior and Scamp spin jungle, techno and breakbeat. Mike And Daggers Big Christmas Cracker at South London Pacific, 340 Kennington Road, SE11 4LD Oval FREE, 7pm-1am. Marshmellow Mike and Dave Daggers play festive songs. A Ratchet Xmas Wonderland at Dalston Superstore, 117 Kingsland High Street, E8 2PB Dalston Kingsland FREE, 9pm-2.30am. DJ Frankie Layo spins R&B and dancehall. Room Service at Miabella, 12-13 Greek Street, W1D 4DL Tottenham Court Road £8, £5 before 12midnight, 10pm-3am. Weekly gay dance party with special guest hosts and residents including Kris Di Angelis, Severino, Fat Tony, Steve Pitron, Matt Bogard and Ariel.

46 Scout London scoutlondon.com

Bring It at 95 Kingsland, 95 Kingsland Road, E8 4AH Old Street £4, 9pm-late. North London producers and DJs Idjut Boys indulge their love of disco in the company of Felix Dickinson (pictured).

Friday December 14 American Graffiti at The Monarch, 40-42 Chalk Farm Road, NW1 8BG Chalk Farm FREE, 8pm. The house DJs play American indie, rock, pop and hip hop. The Big Council Xmas Party at Veranda Bar, 30 Acre Lane, SW2 5SG Brixton £10, adv £5, 9pm-late. DJs Kane and Deezel spin R&B, soul, reggae, house, 1980s and 1990s. Cover Up: The Xmas Wrap Up at Ginglik, Shepherd’s Bush Green, W12 8PH Shepherd’s Bush £8, £6 before 11pm, mems FREE, 7pm-3am. DJ C Boogie and DJ Mozhev spin samba, funk, hip hop, reggae, Baile funk, soul and Latin, with live performances from Human and The Fontanas. Digital Tunes at The Rhythm Factory, 1618 Whitechapel Road, E1 1EW Whitechapel £10, adv £5 & £8, 10pm6am. Dubstep, drum’n’bass, UK funky, garage and techno courtesy of A.I, Zero T, Blu Mar Ten, Savage Rehab, Mr Joseph, Physics, PMX, Shox, Orphan101, Bloodman, Kamikaze Space Programme and Risubo across two rooms, plus MCs Blackeye, Deefa and MC PM. Dollop at Birthdays, 33-35 Stoke Newington Road, N16 8BJ Dalston Kingsland adv £4, 9pm-3am. House and techno from Happa. Dub All Nothing at Cable, 33A Bermondsey Street, SE1 2EG London Bridge Queue Jump £22, £15, adv £10 & £12, mems £10, 10pm-6am. Dubstep courtesy of Zeds Dead, Sigma, TC, Cutline, Taiki, Nulight, Tomek N, Kraze, Syrum, Pan, Jackal, Jooks, Pola, Pelikann, Demo, Gozht, High Rankin, Bar9, Tomba, Culture Code, Hassassin, Jetpack Assassin, Senzer, Killa P and Subzee-D across three rooms. Egg Presents Lost & Found Label Launch at Egg, 200 York Way, N7 9AX King’s Cross St Pancras £20, mems £13, adv £15, 10pm-7am. Guy J, Guy Mantzur, Sahar Z, Leonardo Glovibes, System Of Survival, Moodtrap, Ivo Toscano and Eddy Kruger spin house and techno across two rooms. Feeling Gloomy at The Phoenix, 37 Cavendish Square, W1G 0PP Oxford Circus £6, adv £4.50, NUS £5, 9.30pm-2.30am. DJs Leonard and Cliff spin melancholy pop, rock and indie. Flux London Launch Party at The Sidings, 51-53 Southwark Street, SE1 1RU Southwark £15, adv £10-£12, 10pm6am. Gerd, Phillip Lauer and Michelle Owen spin house and techno with resident support from Jonny Cade, Voyeur, Aartekt, Jacques Adda and Robert Cary.

G-A-Y Camp Attack at Heaven, Charing Cross Arches, Villiers Street, WC2N 6NG Charing Cross w/flyer FREE, 11pm4am. Pop and retro classics from the 1970s to the 1990s, plus songs from musicals in the Departure Lounge with a chance to perform at 1am. The LipSinkers at Royal Vauxhall Tavern, 372 Kennington Lane, SE11 5HY Vauxhall £8, concs £5, 9.30pm. DJ Squeaky and guests spin pop and disco records. Orbital After Party at Jamm, 261 Brixton Road, SW9 6LH Brixton £10, 9pm5am. Phil Hartnoll of Orbital DJs. Play>Time at Lo-Profile, 84-86 Wardour Street, W1F 0TQ Leicester Square £10, £8 before 12midnight, 10pm-4am. Weekly gay dance party hosted by porn star Jay Roberts with special appearances. The Pool At Somerset House at Somerset House, The Strand, WC2R 1LA Temple £17, 8pm-9pm, 9.15pm10.15pm, 10.30pm-11.30pm. Have a winter boogie while you skate under the stars, as the Somerset House ice rink hosts a disco battle between The Pool’s Matty J & Ben Terry, and Luke Unabomber. Superstore Xmas Party at Dalston Superstore, 117 Kingsland High Street, E8 2PB Dalston Kingsland £5, FREE before 10pm, 9pm-3am. Hannah Holland, Jim Warboy and Jeffrey Hinton spin techno, house and bass.

Fabriclive at Fabric, 77A Charterhouse Street, EC1M 6HJ Farringdon £25, adv £24, adv £29 In CD, NUS £19 before 12midnight, mems £19, £10 after 4am, 8pm-8am. DJs Andy C, Chase And Status, Basher, Calyx And TeeBee, Culture Shock, and more at this RAM Records Official 20 Year 12 Hour Xmas Special.

Saturday December 15 2020Vision 12hr Xmas Session at Village Underground, 54 Holywell Lane, EC2A 3PQ Old Street £15, £12 before 10pm, earlybird £10, 6pm-6am. Twelve hours of house, techno and electronic featuring sets from Chez Damier, Ralph Lawson, Andre Lodemann, Climbers, Ossie and Last Magpie. Audio Rehab: Label Launch Party at Fire, Arch, 39-43 Parry Street, corner South Lambeth Road, SW8 1RT Vauxhall £15, 10pm-6am.

Club Mother F****r Xmas Do at Shacklewell Arms, 71 Shacklewell Lane, E8 2EB Dalston Kingsland £5 & £6, 7.30pm-late. DJ Hannah Holland spins techno and house, with live performances from Labyrinth Ear, VuVuVultures and Black Gold Buffalo. Craig Charles Funk And Soul Club at Bloomsbury Bowling Lanes, Basement Of Tavistock Hotel, Tavistock Square, WC1H 9EU Russell Square £8, adv £5, 8pm3am. The actor and Radio 6 DJ spins funk and soul, with Wah Wah 45 DJs in the Kingpin Suite. Deep Within at The Rhythm Factory, 1618 Whitechapel Road, E1 1EW Whitechapel adv £10, 10pm-6am. Deep house and minimal techno courtesy of Cera Alba, FACE, Vice London, Matt Knight, Rishi Patel, Tred Benedict, Charlie Gill, Jordan, Wayne Calita, Tel Everett, Craig Mac and Michael Bedford. Duckie at Royal Vauxhall Tavern, 372 Kennington Lane, SE11 5HY Vauxhall £6, 9pm. Resident DJs spin pop and indie hosted by the inimitable Amy Lame, plus cabaret performances. Fabric at Fabric, 77A Charterhouse Street, EC1M 6HJ Farringdon £21, adv £20, NUS/mems £15, £10 after 4am, 11pm8am. DJs Tobi Neumann, Droog, Marcel Dettmann, Anthony Parasole, Nick Hoppner and The Mole play house and techno across three rooms, plus live performances from dOP and Answer Code Request. Hacienda 30 at KOKO, 1a Camden High Street, NW1 7JE Mornington Crescent £15.50-£17.50, adv £12.50, 9pm-3am. DJs Todd Terry, Marshall Jefferson, Mike Pickering and Bobby Langley. Innersoul at Plan B, 418 Brixton Road, SW9 7AY Brixton £12, £10 before 12midnight, 9pm-4am. DJs Artificial Intelligence, Technimatic, Broken Drum and Duoscience spin drum’n’bass and jungle. Night Slugs Allstar Winter Rave at XOYO, 32-37 Cowper Street, EC2A 4AP Old Street adv £10, 9pm-3am. Hip hop, grime and house courtesy of Bok Bok, L-Vis, Jam City and Girl Unit. With a live performance from Soundstream. Rock And Roll Dance at All Saints Arts Centre, 122 Oakleigh Road North, N20 9EZ Totteridge & Whetstone phone for times, 7.30pm-late. DJ Colin The Train spins vintage rock’n’roll and retro dance hits. Supatronix Christmas Breakbeat Reunion Party at Jamm, 261 Brixton Road, SW9 6LH Brixton £15, adv £10 & £12, 10pm-6am. Stanton Warriors, Rennie Pilgrem, Freestylers, Deekline, Jurassik and Slyde spin drum’n’bass, beats and breaks. Warehouse Presents at Club Warehouse, Unit H9, Hastingwood Trading Estate, 35 Angel Road Harbet Road, N18 3HT £8, 11pm-7am. DJ Richy Ahmed spins tech-house, hip hop, UK funky, disco and techno. We Fear Silence Present at Cable, 33A Bermondsey Street, SE1 2EG London Bridge Queue Jump £24, £16, adv £13 & £14, mems £11, 10pm-6am. Drum’n’bass DJs Friction, Dub Phizix, Alix Perez, Spectrasoul, Icicle, Rockwell, One87, The Prototypes, MJ Cole, El Matador and Reference across two rooms, plus MCs SP:MC, Mantmast and LX One.

Wobble Squad X-mas Special at The Big Chill House, 257-259 Pentonville Road, N1 9NL King’s Cross St Pancras phone for prices, 8pm-2am. Hip hop, electro, disco, house and R&B courtesy of Matt Jam Lamont, Koshii, Rattus Rattus, Sai, Rugrat and London Disco Society DJs, with resident support and live performances from Brotherman, Concrete Disco and Chima Anya. XXL London Lumberjack at Pulse, 1-4 Invicta Plaza, SE1 9UF Blackfriars £15, mems £8, 9pm-6am. Dress in suitably hard-wearing attire as DJs Christian M and Alex Logan play funky house in the main room, while Joe Egg spins retro in the Fluff Bar and Mark Ames spins techno.

S.L.A.G.S / CHILL-OUT Sundays at Royal Vauxhall Tavern, 372 Kennington Lane, SE11 5HY Vauxhall £8, £5 before 7.30pm, 2pm-12noon. Simon Le Vans, Andy Almighty and Sean Sirrs spin disco, electro and house, plus The D E Experience performs live. Sunday Sessions at Gigalum, 7 Cavendish Parade, Clapham Common South Side, SW4 9DW Clapham South phone for prices, 2pm-11pm. Oliver Ingrosso, younger brother of Swedish House Mafia’s Sebastian Ingrosso, spins house.

Sunday December 16 Bump at Plan B, 418 Brixton Road, SW9 7AY Brixton £10, £7 before 11pm, 9pm-4am. CJ Beatz, Phaze 1, CWD and Motive spin hip hop, UK funky, dancehall and dubstep. Heidi’s Birthday Bash at The Lock Tavern, 35 Chalk Farm Road, NW1 8AJ Camden Town FREE, 7.30pm-late. Andrew Weatherall spins rockabilly, rock’n’roll and alternative, while Toddla T, Heidi and special guests mix hip hop and dancehall. Jaded Presents at Cable, 33A Bermondsey Street, SE1 2EG London Bridge £12, concs £8, 5pm1am. Adam Port, &Me and Raymundo Rodriguez spin house and techno across two rooms.

Kubicle 7th Birthday at The Basing House, 25 Kingsland Road, E2 8AA Liverpool Street £5-£12, 8pm-3am. Luke Foss (pictured) and more.

New Year’s Eve How It Should Be!

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scoutlondon.com Scout London 47

The cat finds her tongue As well as being a now unfashionable street drug, Meow Meow is also one of the world’s most acclaimed cabaret artists. She chats to Scout London ahead of her big London Christmas show – a surprisingly poignant piece about youth homelessness

“A

ctually it’s Meow here, not Melissa,” purrs Australia’s number one cabaret star when Scout mistakenly greets her with her birth name instead of her more famous stage moniker. “I’ve got a restraining order out on Melissa,” she continues, with a wicked little chuckle. “She’s well trapped.” Speaking to us on the phone from Sydney, there’s every indication that the velvet-voiced singer is going to be ‘in character’ for the duration of our interview. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. As soon as we get on to the main purpose of our conversation – the forthcoming run of her adaptation of Hans Christian Andersen’s Little Match Girl at the Southbank Centre – any hint of a persona is dropped. She is honest and open, speaking passionately and articulately about perhaps her most poignant piece of work to date. Andersen’s story concerns a poor girl who freezes to death while selling matches in the street in the dead of winter. What made you want to turn such a heartbreaking tale into a cabaret show? Well it’s partly that I think it’s one of the first fairy tales to have a really strong social message. It’s not just about the hero journey or the move into adolescence. It’s much more of a Brecht kind of thing, where it’s educating for more social responsibility. It’s about society stepping over the trauma that is all around us. Was the idea of using it to comment on the plight of young homelessness in the modern age always part of your intention? Yes. I had seen a documentary about a homeless youth shelter in Sydney that hit me really hard – it’s an excruciating documentary to watch because it grapples with the impossibility of 48 Scout London scoutlondon.com

fixing everybody and helping everybody, in spite of the great desire and bravery of those who go out into the fray and attempt to tackle these problems. I think that path is equally valid for an artist. I’m always thinking about what I should be doing in the world. Is it enough just to make people laugh? I’ve also had some extremely sad things happen to me this year, and in that time I’ve really wanted music that isn’t just an arty affectation, but that is cathartic and essential to the listener’s wellbeing. So do you think this show can make a difference? I hope so, but you can’t solve all of the problems of the world with a show. On some days I just feel like we’re powerless, but on good days I feel that music is an activator, a balm to the soul, it soothes, it entertains and I hope it makes people think. If I can make people think but then be completely stupid the next moment and make them laugh, that’s a good thing to aspire to. So the show will definitely be funny? Yes, people will laugh – because I’m a ridiculous and funny person. But I’m not parodying the story or the issues it raises. I think it’s an honest reflection of how we’re always running on multiple and often conflicting emotions. If I was just to do a diatribe, of course it wouldn’t be effective. I do a slow splits while reading statistics, which is not a bad way to cover the bases.

And will there be crowd surfing – the usual fun and frolics we’re used to at your shows? You never know. Whatever is needed to tell the story. It’s different from a Meow extravaganza, though it is definitely extravagant. Meow Meow’s Little Match Girl, Queen Elizabeth Hall, December 13-30, southbankcentre.co.uk

Too cabaret? Having taken Gary Barlow down a peg or two with an amusing viral video, cabaret superstars Frisky & Mannish are planning to celebrate Christmas in style with a huge party at Koko. Lauren Paxman chats to Mannish

Turner Rouse, Jr / John Daughtry

n December 25, Matthew Floyd Jones will be spending Christmas with his family. So far, so very normal. But the same can’t be said for the planned celebrations of his stage alter-ego, Mannish. Floyd Jones and Laura Corcoran, aka Frisky, make up comedy cabaret duo Frisky & Mannish, who will be toasting the festive period in an altogether more glitzy way, by taking over Koko on December 14 for a “splashy” extravaganza of pop parodies old and new. F&M made their name by reinterpreting chart classics in unexpected, invariably hilarious and often incredibly musically dexterous ways. They’ve turned The Pussycat Dolls’ Beep into a risqué dancehall tune, covered Peter Andre in the style of Florence and the Machine, and woven classics by The Bangles, Frankie Valli and Adele into an outrageously funny stalker medley. But that’s just for starters. The forthcoming Christmas show will see the duo pulling out all the stops, and taking their act bigger than ever before. They’ll have their very own band for the first time (normally all musical accompaniment is either Floyd Jones on the piano or a backing track), plus support acts that include Abandoman and Piff the Magic Dragon.

Floyd Jones describes it as a “one-off crazy night where we throw everything but the kitchen sink at it”. Anyone who has happened across their extensive YouTube presence should have some idea what he means. “The on stage personas are healthy doses of what we find ridiculous about ourselves,” he tells Scout London. “But in real life we’re so not that bothered about make-up and sparkly things.” The pair met at Oxford University, and graduated into the harsh world of selling postcards at the National Gallery and ice cream at Piccadilly Theatre. “Frisky & Mannish came about because Laura and I were depressed, unemployed, living together and wanting something fun to remind ourselves why we were bothering in the first place,” recalls the 27-year-old. A friend invited them to perform at an open mic night for charity. Within a few months they were able to quit their jobs and become full-time cabaret artists. And now, five years on, their act has taken them around the world. “When we realised people liked our stuff we were surprised – for about five minutes – and then we were like, ‘How are we going to get on TV?’ We’re quite ambitious,” he chuckles.

“I’ve actually been surprised by how much we’ve got away with. Our first show in Edinburgh [School of Pop] was this big success that got us bookings in Australia, New Zealand and Singapore – but we’d only done one show.” The duo once again found themselves in the spotlight just over a month ago, after X Factor judge Gary Barlow derogatorily dismissed an act as “cabaret” one too many times on the show. He hit a nerve that ran through the whole cabaret world, prompting Frisky & Mannish to round-up some contemporaries at ‘Cabarati HQ’ to film Too Cabaret: A Message For Gary Barlow. The spoof music video, which saw the various acts all undergoing X Factor-style makeovers, went viral – and even Barlow admitted to being impressed. “It was very moving really,” says Floyd Jones, “because suddenly people were coming out of the woodwork to say, ‘I’m so glad you did this because I feel very strongly about this too’.” So Barlow’s casual derision came back to bite him in the behind, confirming what Frisky and Mannish’s irrepressible success is great evidence of: there’s no such thing as ‘too cabaret’. Frisky & Mannish, Koko, December 14, koko.uk.com scoutlondon.com Scout London 49

PREVIEWS The Animals and Children Took to the Streets National Theatre December 12-January 10, £12-£24 This sinister and spellbinding modern fairy tale by the 1927 theatre company first played as the Christmas show at Battersea Arts Centre two years ago. Such were its dark charms that it transferred to the National last Christmas and is now back for a second seasonal run, topping the bill of the city’s ‘alternative festive shows’. Set in a sordid tenement block of an unnamed city, it weaves live action with animation and music into a thrillingly original spectacle that the press material quite appropriately describes as “a giant graphic novel burst into life”. SE1 9PX Waterloo nationaltheatre.org.uk

The Nutcracker Royal Opera House December 10-January 16, returns only Right up there with panto in the traditional Christmas theatre stakes, Tchaikovsky’s seminal ballet is an enchanting seasonal piece for the whole family, performed here by the world-class Royal Ballet. WC2E 9DD

Covent Garden roh.org.uk

Cinderella: The Anti-Panto Leicester Square Theatre December 10-30, £18.50 Not to be confused with the many ‘adult pantos’ currently doing the rounds, this ‘antipanto’ is more about the scares than the saucy innuendo. Expect dark and disturbing characters in Blind Tiger’s telling of the story. WC2H 7BX Leicester Square leicestersquaretheatre.com

The Happy Journey to Trenton and Camden & The Long Christmas Dinner King’s Head Pub Theatre December 11-January 5, £16-£25 Julien Cottereau’s Imagine Toi Purcell Room, Southbank Centre December 13-24, £15 Clowning and mime are muchderided artforms. But when you see this former Cirque-du-Soleil star in action, all visions of tired slapstick, white gloves and flowers that shoot water will be immediately forgotten. Cottereau is quite simply a physical genius, whose joyous routine uses incredible mime and sound effects to capture the imaginations of all ages. Easily one of the most magical shows of the season. SE1 8XX Waterloo southbankcentre.co.uk

A double bill of plays by underrated and under-performed American playwright and Pulitzer Prize-winner Thornton Wilder. N1 1QN

Penny Arcade Bitch! Dyke! Faghag! Whore! Albany Theatre December 15-23, £10-£18 After acclaimed runs at The Old Vic Tunnels and the Arcola, the last London shows for performance artist Penny Arcade and her band of scantily-clad, party-hungry accomplices are a wild alternative to, er, everything Christmas. SE8 4AG

50 Scout London scoutlondon.com

Angel kingsheadtheatre.com

Deptford thealbany.org.uk

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Cinderella: A Fairytale St James Theatre December 12-January 26, £15-£40 The much-heralded Travelling Light theatre company is bringing its fresh and imaginative take on one of the world’s most famous fairy tales to London after securing a raft of five star reviews during its run in Bristol last Christmas. Combining elements of the Brothers Grimm story with the pre-dated Chinese version, it’s a funny, moving and (of course) enchanting telling of the tale unlike any you’re likely to have seen before. SW1E 5JA

Victoria stjamestheatre.co.uk

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 Evening Standard, Financial Times, Time Out Sydney

‘This is a perfect alternative show. In fact, it is a perfect show.’ Financial Times

Seamlessly synchronizing live music, performance and storytelling with stunning film and animation, the internationally acclaimed show by award-winning company 1927 returns. The Dance of Death Trafalgar Studios December 13-January 5, £22 Is it just us or is London’s theatrical landscape more misery-strewn this festive season than ever before? Every week seems to bring a new counterpoint to the cheer and merriment of the panto gang, this week in the form of August Strindberg’s bleak and brutal tale of a marriage gone well beyond wrong. Expect some pitch-black comedy but far more drama from this Donmar Warehouse production of Irish playwright Conor McPherson’s new adaptation. SW1A 2DY

Charing Cross donmarwarehouse.com

12 December – 10 January National Theatre South Bank SE1 9PX 020 7452 3000 nationaltheatre.org.uk

Co-commissioned by BAC, Malthouse Theatre & The Showroom (University of Chichester) Developed at BAC

No booking fee

Waterloo, Southwark, Embankment

Photo © ‘1927’