You’re not alone!

I has been shown that one in 10 students identify as gender diverse, yet much of society still refuses to acknowledge that more exists than the typical male and female sexes. Did you know for example that there are at least 70 genders? Controversial viewpoints about gender diversity have reportedly led to a decline in some teenagers’ mental health. As a society, it’s time to start accepting us for how we identify and to stop invalidating those of us who choose other pronouns.

Gender identity experiences

Tag has been speaking to two 16 year olds - Asher Raven Cousins (he/they) and Jamie James (he/they) who do not identify as their birth gender.

Asher stated that “It wasn’t difficult coming out to my friends, but to anyone who didn’t know me, it was harder because I didn’t know how they would react”.

Coming out can be stressful. According to stonewall.org only 46% of the LGBTQIA+ community feel able to speak openly about their gender identity or sexual orientation with their family. It’s up to you who you tell, and it’s okay to keep it to yourself if you don’t feel comfortable talking about it yet.

Tag: What did you do to try and stop the bullying?

Alice: Confronting them face to face, maybe levelling with them would stop the bullying.

Tag: So, what do you do if you are being bullied?

Alice: Well, if you feel like you are being bullied then we suggest that you go straight to a teacher at your school, college, or a parent/carer at home. It is always best to tell someone whom you trust and show them evidence or screenshots of any messages of you being cyberbullied. You never have to deal with bullying alone, talking to someone and finding a way to stop it is the best way of handling bullying.

Tag: What would you say to other people who may be experiencing bullying?

Alice: Using your voice is the most powerful weapon you have. Don’t sit in silence. Your voice is there to be heard. So, if you have a problem let people know.

We asked Asher and Jamie whether access to more information on this would have made it easier for them to realise their gender identity. Asher responded, “It would have made it easier, yes. Little information was given to me while I was in secondary school which was the time I began to question my identity.” Jamie agreed, “As much as I knew that I was different, I didn’t know how or why.” He also commented “By teaching children and young people the importance of gender identity, we can build a more inclusive generation”.

What should you do?

Feeling “different” or isolated is normal for anyone questioning their identity or sexuality, but it’s important to know that there are millions of people who are or have been in the same situation. It is important to educate yourself, along with others, to better understand yourself and help your friends and family to understand you too. There are many resources available to you that can help you with this which you can find online, in books, or simply by talking to members of the LGBTQIA+ community.

People often believe that they should fit perfectly within the criteria of a certain identity. The truth is, no label will ever describe you perfectly, so it’s okay to choose one that fits you best, or not use one at all. While it can be scary and difficult to work out how you identify, it can also bring you peace of mind, allowing you to begin to feel comfortable with yourself and your identity.