One Pride flag’s journey
Local activist to deliver historically significant flag to Ukraine
by Morgan M. Hurley, Editor
This month, a historic handoff will take place in Malta at one of EuroPride’s signature events – the International LGBTQ+ Human Rights Conference – hosted by the Maltese government between a member of our local community and a representative from Ukraine Pride. What will be given to Ukraine is a Pride flag that has great historical significance for our LGBTQ community at large, and now our own local community.
On March 25, Eddie Reynoso, the multi-hatted publisher of this newspaper, walked into Rich’s Nightclub for his night shift as
VIP Host. Other crew members were decorating for the evening’s festivities and as Reynoso walked by, he noticed a large plastic storage bin near them that was half open, with what appeared to be a very large rainbow flag hanging out of it. He went about his shift, but kept thinking about it, and later asked someone specifics regarding the container he saw and the flag inside.
“Oh it’s got the wrong colors and we’re going to throw it out,” he was told. Another employee confirmed they were getting rid of it, because it “was stained” and
had “extra colors.” Even more intrigued by the “wrong” and “extra colors” comments, Reynoso went up to Rich’s attic where the containers were usually stored and tracked the bin down.
“I started to unravel the flag and immediately noticed the indigo – which is different from purple; most commercially made rainbow flags use purple,” he explained. “Gilbert Baker and other traditionalists used indigo.”
He took the flag outside to see better in the light of day and have more room to lay it out for inspection.
“Outside I started to open it up further and noticed the pink and turquoise, which are two colors that are unique and iconic to Gilbert Baker’s original flag, and the ‘Sea to Sea Flag.’ When I saw them I felt my heart jump and
See PRIDE FLAG page 4
Prior to the renovations, The Center’s lobby had a number of personalized tiles affixed to the walls honoring community members who made contributions to the organization over the years. Several of the tiles were purchased by donors who helped the organization finance its move to its current building which has substantially more space (and a large auditorium for community gatherings) than the building that The Center occupied on Normal Street throughout most of the 1990s. Those tiles were removed during the recent renovations.
Cara Dessert, CEO of The Center, told LGBTQ San Diego County News that the renovations came about due to a large-scale community outreach process that involved over 2,000 community members. Part of the feedback received, she said, was about the need to modernize the main Center to create a more welcoming and inclusive experience and create more community spaces on the first floor.
“When we reopened to the public, we received overwhelmingly positive feedback about our renovations, with one exception,” said Dessert. “We heard from several community members concerned about the removal of the donor tiles.”
The Center responds to community concerns about donor tiles that disappeared
by
Benny Cartwright
The San Diego LGBT Community Center (The Center) recently completed a renovation and modernization of the ground floor of its flagship facility in Hillcrest. Since moving into the space at 3909 Centre Street in 1999, these renovations were the first major upgrades to the building since the early 2000s.
Dessert noted that in an effort to preserve this history, a digital display of the original tiles was created in The Center’s auditorium to preserve the look of the tiles. She said the display has been present in The Center’s auditorium for all major events, as this is the main room at The Center for large community gatherings.
In recent months, some community members have taken to social media and also reached out to LGBTQ San Diego County News to share concerns about the removal of the tiles, some that had been on display for nearly 20 years.
Toni Atkins to step down from leadership role
San Diego’s beloved Toni Atkins will step down early next year as Senate president pro tempore, the leader of the state’s upper legislative chamber.
Atkins announced her decision at a press conference on Monday, Aug. 28, and also stated that Sen. Mike McGuire, a Democrat from the Northern Coastal areas of California, will take her place.
Atkins has termed out and must leave the Senate at the end of 2024. She said the decision was made to make this announcement now, so that the caucus can get on with their duties without distraction before their end of session in September.
“We have a lot of work to get through in the next few weeks,” Atkins said, referring to the chaotic final days of the legislative session when lawmakers will vote on hundreds of bills. “This work does not mix well with internal caucus politics being at the top of everyone’s minds.”
According to the state of California’s Capitol Museum website: “The President pro Tempore is the central figure in the policy-making and politics of the State Senate, elected by a vote of all the Senators as the leader of the Upper House. They are responsible for its administration, policy agenda, and its relationships with the Assembly and the Executive Branch.” As the powerful president pro tempore, Atkins has been responsible for negotiations between the governor and the assembly speaker, with a state operating budget of $300 billion. When she was in the state assembly, Atkins also held the equally powerful speaker position, and is only one of three individuals who have held both top leadership positions in the history of California’s state legislature. California’s Attorney General released a statement about the announcement on Tuesday, Aug. 29.
SEPTEMBER 1, 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS Photos! P16 The first (and last) walk Readers will decide >>> COMMUNITY P8 >>> NEWS P3 >>> DINING P13 >>> ART P14 An artist’s tango Drama
858-886-9458 sales@lgbtqsd.news See NEWS BRIEFS page 2 See DONOR TILES page 2 CONTACT US
in Point Loma
(left) The header of one of the “Sea to Sea” flags found in Rich’s attic, number 71 of 250, signed by Gilbert Baker. (right) The flag is carefully folded to fit into a shadowbox. (Photos courtesy Eddie Reynoso)
One of the dozens of tiles sold to community members through the years to benefit The Center. (Photo by Big Mike)
Atkins has been a San Diego Councilmember, Mayor, Assemblymember and Senator. (Courtesy Sen. Atkins office)
‘What happened to the tiles?’
FROM PAGE 1
DONOR TILES
Michael Phillips, known by most as “Big Mike,” a former board member of The Center, was one of the first to share his concerns on social media after touring the newly renovated space and noticing the tiles were missing (Editor’s Note: Big Mike is a contributor and staff photographer for this publication).
In an April social media post, Phillips shared:
“I just came across a photo of the three or four tiles that I gladly bought over the years when our LGBTQ Community Center asked for help. They would ask our community for financial help to keep the doors open to continue its programs and to continue to have a gathering place where people in our community would feel safe to come to. I have mentioned this before and since have been approached by a handful of those donors who also had their titles taken down. The Center did this without any notice or contacting anyone who helped in those days of need by donating money during those hard times. Well, The Center not too long ago decided to remodel and just took it upon themselves to tear down all the tiles with the names of those supporters that were and are a part of our Center’s History to keep those DOORS OPEN. They should be thankful for all those past donors back then that were responsible to keep those Center’s doors open so years later they could even have a job now.”
Several community members commented on Phillips’ post, sharing similar sentiments, many of them saying they, too, previously had a tile on the wall.
Longtime community activist Wendy Sue Biegeleisen said that she was one of the first 100 people to make a donation for a tile at The Center’s facility in the early 2000s for a fundraising campaign called “Help Build the New LGBT Community Center.” The tiles were to honor donors to the campaign as “Cornerstones of Our Community,” she said.
“I saved my hard earned pennies so I could donate a brick for the posterity of building the San Diego LGBT Community Center,” Biegeleisn posted. “I proudly pointed out ‘my brick’ to my family, including my Pop, that helped build Our Center. Sadly, I never took a picture of it because I thought ‘my tile’ would be there forever as a small part of all the other bricks physically holding up the principles of Our Center.”
In response to an inquiry by LGBTQ San Diego County News, CEO Dessert shared additional information about the removal of the tiles. She stated that while The Center’s main floor was closed to the general public during the COVID-19 shutdown, the organization took that opportunity to renovate the building’s first floor to create a more modern, functional, and welcoming environment.
“Unfortunately, the changes that made this possible meant that we could not retain a set of tiles on our lobby walls, something that we never would have foreseen when we first launched these donor tiles in 2000,” Dessert said. “This decision was made out of necessity, and in response to our community’s direct input to create an experience where
FROM PAGE 1
NEWS BRIEFS
“Senate President pro Tempore Toni Atkins is a barrierbreaker and a California icon,” Attorney General Ron Bonta said in the release. “From our days serving together in the California State Assembly, to now, I’ve always been able to count on her for wisdom, leadership, and stalwart commitment to serving the people of California.”
McGuire was elected to the Senate in 2014, and had high praise for Atkins as a “trailblazer” at the press conference, and emphasized that for now, Atkins was still in charge.
“The pro tem and I, we are unified in our transition,” McGuire said. “And we can make this promise to each and every one of you. The next three weeks, getting these bills off the floor and into the governor’s desk is going to be smooth, successful and focused on the success of the Golden state.”
Lazy
Acres new
Community
Partner program to benefit The Center
On Aug. 26, the Lazy Acres
anyone who walked through our doors would see themselves reflected in our lobby and feel welcomed.”
As part of the renovations, a centrally located and moveable Welcome Desk was added and more meeting spaces with accessibility features were opened, along with art from local LGBTQ+ artists depicting LGBTQ+ themes. Dessert also said that in an effort to make their offerings more accessible, large lobby monitors were added to showcase the diversity of the community and the programs and services at The Center.
“To achieve this, we needed wall space, and since we could not renovate the first floor of the Main Center building without removing the tiles, we made the decision to remove them and try to preserve them,” Dessert said.
In response to our question about where the tiles are now, Dessert said that several donors were reached out to prior to their removal so Center officials could tell them about their plans.
“The COVID-19 pandemic and our need to address several crises being experienced disproportionately by our communities made reaching everyone difficult,” she said. “To make room for these changes, our plan was to remove the tiles and preserve them for any donors who would want them. Unfortunately, we were not able to preserve all of them. For the tiles we were able to save, we reached out to the folks who had donated them, but most said they did not want the tiles and understood that the space needed to evolve. Several came in for a tour to see the renovated space and were thrilled at the modern look and additional community spaces.”
Dessert acknowledged that as many of the decisions regarding The Center’s renovations and the tiles were made in the midst of the pandemic when the organization’s main focus was on providing emergency services to the community, they could have done a better job at communicating to the community.
“We missed the mark in communicating these changes with the community … we apologize for this,” Dessert said. “In hindsight, not having more robust communication about the change to the tiles and offering options to replace them was an oversight – and one that we have learned from. We understand that at least a few folx would like to make a plan to replace the tile they had donated. We welcome that dialogue so that our community’s history is preserved.”
Dessert said the tiles that were on display in the lobby were purchased between 2000 and 2018. Some community members asked whether there were any contractual agreements made with donors about where and for what length of time their tiles would be displayed, but none of the donors we spoke to were able to recall whether or not they had made any standing agreements with the organization.
grocery store in Mission Hills launched a new program that both engages customers and will benefit a number of local nonprofits, each hand-selected “for doing important work in the area, with a focus in K-12 education efforts, hunger relief, and environmental stewardship,” stated a press release.
The program will reward customers for thinking sustainably and helping the environment by shopping with reusable bags, and then let them “give back” to the community at the same time.
“Envirotokens” will be awarded to shoppers at checkout when they use their own grocery bag (tokens are worth 10 cents per bag). As customers exit the store, they can drop their token(s) into one or more boxes for the community partner of their choice.
At the end of the month, the Envirotokens will be tallied up, converted into dollars, and a check will be sent to the chosen benefactors, which include, Art Reach San Diego; Grant Education Foundation; Kitchens for Good; San Diego Humane Society; San Diego River Park Foundation; and the San Diego LGBT Community Center.
“The Center is located just a few blocks from our Mission Hills store, which borders the Hillcrest neighborhood, and they have a food pantry on-site,” said Kate Halper, marketing director of Lazy Acres Natural Market. “Supporting our nearby neighbors to combat food insecurity is part of how we live our mission as a communityminded grocer.”
The program kicked off on Aug. 26 with a celebration at the grocery store, which included reusable bag giveaways, community partner representatives, games, other giveaways, a scavenger hunt, and more.
“Caring for community is central to who we are,” said Geoff Babb, vice president of operations for Lazy Acres. “For more than 30 years, we’ve been focused on doing the right thing for our neighbors, for our earth, and for each other. This new giving program is another way we can work together with our collective future in mind. When our customers make a sustainable choice to reduce waste and reuse, our local neighborhoods will benefit.”
Lazy Acres Mission Hills is located at 422 W. Washington
Dessert confirmed that there were no agreements in place for the tiles to remain for any set period of time.
“We understand that for some donors, these tiles were acts of love and remembrance.” she said. “We are committed to finding a way to continue this history and have a few options for donors to choose from.”
While replacement tiles will not be able to be put back up in the lobby, The Center is willing to explore other options for each donor. An online form has been created for lobby tile donors who would like their tile replaced at no cost and they look forward to hearing from any and all interested donors. The form can be found at bit.ly/center-tiles.
In closing, Dessert shared that community centers, by their nature, change to serve an evolving community, and that includes decisions about physical spaces.
“Here in San Diego, we are fortunate to have an incredible LGBTQ community that has supported The Center’s growth for 50 years, as one of the oldest LGBTQ organizations in the world and the second oldest LGBTQ center in the country,” Dessert said.
“Honoring our rich history is an important part of our work to serve and support our LGBTQ community,” she continued. “We are grateful to those who took the time to contact us and let us know that we missed the mark with the changes to the lobby tiles, and should have offered additional solutions to preserve this history beyond the digital display. We are committed to making this right for those who would have preferred their tile to remain in the lobby.
“If you had a tile in our lobby at The Center, please contact us and we will follow up with you to create a replacement plan for your tile.”
Previous donors who wish to discuss a replacement tile can contact The Center at this link: bit.ly/center-tiles
–Benny Cartwright is a longtime activist and community leader. Reach him at community@lgbtqsd.news. Follow him on Instagram @BennyC80. ▼
St., and open from 6 am to 10 pm, Monday through Sunday. For additional Envirotokens information, store hours, and more information, visit lazyacres.com
producing a one-day speaker series on Oct. 21. The keynote speaker for the day will be Ignacio Darnaude, and his talk is titled, “Hiding In Plain Sight -- Breaking the Gay Code in Art.” The Studio Door describes Darnaude’s keynote:
Get your Art on for LGBT History month
The Studio Door, located at 3867 Fourth Ave., in Hillcrest, is launching a new annual exhibition called ART+ LGBT History Month, in conjunction with October’s identification as LGBT History Month.
Held Oct. 5-28, the monthlong exhibit will feature the work of local artists, including Jackie Han (a photographer), Carole Kuck (an acrylic artist), RD Riccoboni (Californiaism), Joe Phillips (illustrator) and a number of works curated from Lambda Archives’ extensive collection.
In addition to the gallery exhibit, The Studio Door is also
“This lecture will show with stunning visuals how throughout time numerous visionary queer artists -- from Michelangelo to David Hockney -- navigated their repressive times by ingeniously embedding their same-sex desires within classical, religious, and mythological motifs. These artists also wove coded imagery into their masterpieces, enabling them to convey astonishing gay, lesbian, and gender-fluid themes without fear of retribution. Their stunning and subversive imagery not only evaded mainstream detection but also transformed mainstream culture every step of the way.”
Other speakers include Leilani Caithness and Jeremy Prince from San Diego History Center, speaking on “Cultivating an LGBT Art Collection”; RD Riccoboni, “An Artist’s Odyssey through Personal Creativity and Collective
See BRIEFS page 5
2 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS NEWS
A wall of donor tiles disappeared during the time The Center was closed to the public during the pandemic. (Photos by Big Mike)
MAKE IT zEN
4 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS NEWS
Gilbert Baker’s original“Sea to Sea” flag, stretched across the length of Duval Street in Key West. Baker divided the flag into segments and signed and numbered each one, to share with Pride organizations. (Photo by Andy Newman /Florida Keys News Bureau)
FROM PAGE 1 PRIDE FLAG GUESTS MUST BE 21+ TO ENTER THE CASINO. PLEASE PLAY RESPONSIBLY. BOOK NOW AT SYCUAN.COM
—Morgan M. Hurley is the editor-in-chief of this newspaper. You can reach her at editor@ lgbtqsd.news. ▼
line celebrates gender and size-inclusive apparel and is only available through e-commerce.
campus for their LGBTQ+ students, faculty and staff.”
History,”; and Nicole Verdes of Lambda Archives San Diego, “Unearthing LGBTQ+ Narratives through San Diego Artistry.”
The speaker series will run from 10-3 pm on Oct. 21 (includes a one hour break for lunch), and be followed by their monthly gallery reception from 4-6 pm.
For those who wish to see the exhibition, the gallery is open Tuesday through Saturday from noon to 7 pm and is always free to the public. For more information, visit thestudiodoor.com
They welcome “all identity groups, body types, and walks of life,” as stated in their Aug. 24 press release. Their website adds “preference or gender” to that list, and it shares their mission as: “Ensure everyone has access to affordable, stylish clothes that fit both their body, and more importantly, their personality. We’ve heard thousands of stories about our clothes helping people feel more confident and comfortable in their own skin. And, we hope to hear millions more. We believe changing your clothes can change your life.”
The couple said they are immensely passionate about their work and the concept grew from Vicky’s discomfort with trying to find gender-neutral styles for herself.
“In the current climate, in which LGBTQ+ identities have become political talking points and laws are being weaponized against LGBTQ+ people, the commitment to creating campuses that welcome and protect LGBTQ+ students cannot be taken for granted,” said Campus Pride CEO and Executive Director Shane Mendez Windmeyer, in Thursday’s announcement.
“The students -- they really
Mission is to “Achieve legal, social, and cultural equity for SOGIESC communities (sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression and sex characteristics) through the Pride movement.”
Members of InterPride can include any LGBTQIA+ organization that “produces Pride or Pride-like events” for their community.
“Whether it’s a parade, march, rally, festival, arts festival, cultural activity or event, we want to provide a warm and inclusive space for people of all sexual identities – Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, and/or other emerging sexual identities,” InterPride states on their website.
attendance to the Nightmare on Normal festivities will also be free for attendees.
InterPride also offers a variety of grants to organizations around the world. To review their grant programs, visit interpride.org/ grants. For more information about InterPride, visit sdpride. org/interpride
CA AG addresses attacks on trans community
Gaslamp Skate Sundays
Many of you know that Fifth Avenue in the Gaslamp Quarter is now shut down to traffic in the evenings, opening up endless possibilities for public engagement. As a result, for the past seven weeks, the Gaslamp Quarter Association has sponsored a “Skate Night” in the middle of the street at Fifth and Island avenues, hosted by Sunset Roller Club.
If you’ve missed out on all this summer skating fun so far, you have one more chance to enjoy it; this Sunday, Sept. 3, from 5:30 - 8 pm.
According to the GQA’s website, “Gaslamp Quarter transforms into a skating paradise that’s bursting with themed sessions, groovy music, and summer vibes. It’s the perfect opportunity to show off your moves!”
Each Sunday has had a special theme and this final Sunday will be “The ’90s.” So grab your friends, break out your funky outfits, string up your skates and join the fray. Live music will be spinning by resident DJ Yodah and other special guests. Parking is available at the 6th & K Parkade and Park It on Market. To learn more, visit gaslamp.org/ skate-sundays.
Check out this post on Instagram from a previous weekend: bit.ly/3EiLOf8
“We’re not just trying to change the way we view fashion, we’re trying to change the way we view each other,” Vicki and Charisse said in the press release. “We are all people, beyond labels and categories … what matters most is feeling at home in your own skin, feeling like you’re being seen and accepted not for what you are, but who you are.
“And while clothing may not be the answer, it’s certainly a catalyst,” they continued. “Clothing that fits our authentic selves can imbue confidence, inspire change, and help us show up in the world at our best.”
The contest is currently open to applicants and votes through Sept. 17, and the winner will be announced Sept. 18. Lots of entries are already in the running.
To enter, visit their website, submit a high-quality photo (preferably in DB clothing), write a short blurb about why you should win, and once visible on the website, get out the vote by sharing your link with friends and social media followers. Don’t forget to use the hashtag #IAmDapperBoi and tag @ dapperboi for a chance to get reposted.
To enter the Dapper Boi’s Next Top Model Contest, peruse the entries so far, or learn more about their clothing, visit bit. ly/45u17NP
SDSU is ‘Best of Best’
are part of what makes SDSU the ‘best of the best,’” said Kay Wong, director of SDSU’s Pride Center “They are part of who are creating this campus culture and the campus environment that people feel like they can be themselves, that they can be out.”
Just 30 colleges and universities made the annual list, with SDSU being the only one in California. Southern Oregon University, Ashland, was the only other college on the entire West Coast to make the list. This is SDSU’s third year in a row to make the rankings.
SDSU’s Pride Center is about to celebrate its 10th anniversary in January. The school is still working on ways for students to change their legal name to their preferred name across the campus, but the same officials who are championing every other aspect of inclusion on campus are working on it.
About 8 % of SDSU students identify as LGBTQ, based on figures the school submitted to INSIGHT Into Diversity magazine/website in 2022. For more information, visit campuspride.org
San Diego to host InterPride 2023 next month
Forty years after holding its first conference in San Diego, InterPride General Meeting and World Conference 2023 is returning to San Diego on Oct. 25-29, at the Westin San Diego Gaslamp Quarter, downtown, located at 910 Broadway Circle.
Prices for the four-day conference are $375 until Sept. 30, and will be $415 thereafter. Those who just want to attend the social events (receptions and the gala) are $200. Note: Non-members will pay $50 above the current registration rate.
Attendees will be in town at the same time as Hillcrest’s big Halloween event, “Nightmare on Normal Street,” which takes place after the Interpride Gala on Saturday, Oct. 26. Free shuttle services will be provided from the Westin Hotel to Hillcrest, and
Four Southern California school districts – Chino Valley Unified, Anderson Union High School District, Temecula, and Murrieta Valley – have all recently made moves to give parents more rights and subject LGBTQ students to more strife, and California’s Attorney General Ron Bonta is not having it.
On Tuesday, Bonta announced a lawsuit, filed in Riverside County, to immediately halt a policy the board for Chino Valley Unified school district adopted in July, which, with minimal exceptions, requires schools to inform parents – without the student’s permission – whenever a student requests to use a pronoun or name that is different
Dapper
Boi ‘Top Model’ Contest Returns
Dapper Boi clothing brand, founded in 2015 by a local San Diegan lesbian couple, is once again looking for a “Top Model” to style their brand. Their first competition in 2021 drew 1,000 entries, and earlier this year, they were on Shark Tank.
The first place winner for 2023 will be flown to San Diego, given a two-night stay, and receive a full Dapper Boi professional makeover and photoshoot.
Vicki and Charisse Pasche’s “handsomely styled” clothing
according to Campus Pride
The annual Campus Pride report card, which rates college campuses for their LGBTQfriendliness, gave San Diego State University (SDSU) a five-star rating for their 2023 “Best of the Best” list, which was announced Aug. 24. All in all, 45 different criteria being met led to the high rating, including an LGBTQ Studies program, an LGBTQ living space, and a campus resource center.
Campus Pride said the “Best of the Best” list gives recognition to universities that make an effort “to create a safe and welcoming
Hosted by San Diego Pride, the four-day event will include workshops, networking, caucuses, plenaries, receptions, meetings and a huge gala event with dinner and a reception. The Westin has since sold out for the week of InterPride, and the overflow hotel is the Westgate, located across the street from the Westin on Broadway.
At time of publication, the various workshops offered had not yet been detailed, but some of the breakout sessions include caucuses for seniors, small Prides, those living with HIV, womenspecific, BIPOC, bisexual, trans and gender-non-conforming, etc. Networking events for larger and mid-size Pride organizations as well as regional meetings, and spaces for sober attendees and those who need quiet time will also be offered.
According to their website (interpride.org), InterPride’s
5 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS
Clothing for all genders, body types and personalities. (Courtesy dapperboi. com)
(Courtesy Pride Center)
FROM PAGE 2 BRIEFS
Skating in the streets of downtown (Courtesy GQA) See
BRIEFS page 15
Our newspaper is in danger of going out of print
We need our community’s help! Subscribe. Donate. Advertise.
When I took over as publisher of this newspaper, I knew that it was not on solid financial footing. In fact, Terry Sidie, our former publisher, even warned me about the paper’s financial losses, and some serious concerns he had with the paper and a grant the paper had received without his prior knowledge.
Those statements quickly sobered me up to the reality and task that lay ahead for me. I knew that keeping this paper going was not going to be an easy task. And like any other business, I knew it would take time and dedication.
What we didn’t know at the time, however, was the gravity of the situation, and how poorly the paper’s prior managing staff had left it -- not just in its funding streams, but also with challenges in succession planning, grant management, and financial recovery coming out of COVID-19.
We have since learned and have had to alert some of our affected advertisers, our grant funders, and others, that the paper’s circulation and readership numbers were willingly, knowingly, and purposefully falsified by staff. In addition to inflating the circulation numbers, we have learned that many of the deliverables that the paper was contracted to meet, were not made -- forcing us to delve into a significant audit of the funding the paper received through a grant earlier this year, and what we learned is, potentially, we may be forced to repay some of it back.
This is not something I take delight in reporting.
All this has put the paper in a challenging position, where we now must ask our community for support as we explore a way forward in order to continue publishing. We are in serious danger of going out of print.
I know this open letter to our community may be shocking to some. Believe me when I say it is difficult to reach out with one hand and ask for help, while with our other, let our community know that some among our prior staff wronged the advertisers, the grant funders, the former publisher, and the associate publisher.
What does this mean for our community? During times of crisis, celebration, and mourning, crucial information about our community comes from local reporters and writers. Access to high quality information is essential. Especially local information. And especially now. What’s happening in our communities? How are our local leaders responding? For answers to these questions, we rely on the hard work of our local journalists and writers.
We know that due to the recent COVID-19 pandemic, and uncertain economic times, most local news publications are losing money, fast. Advertising has plummeted during these ongoing crises and readers aren’t subscribing fast enough to fill the void. And just as our society faces numerous, urgent challenges, thousands of local reporters are being laid off -- including at many LGBTQ+ publications across the state and nation.
Times are challenging. LGBTQ+ Americans are under attack. Our community is the target of legislative bills seeking to ban or restrict: gender-affirming health care for transgender youth; LGBTQ+ history; public displays of the Rainbow Pride Flag; access to medical care;
access to bathrooms; drag shows; and more. Violent attacks against our businesses, including gun violence is happening, including here in San Diego. Thousands of people -- including our neighbors, friends, and family, are in danger of losing access to the authoritative local information they need to stay informed.
In a recent San Diego Union Tribune OpEd, a local LGBTQ leader recently reminded our community that we need to be able to tell our own stories and that we need a space to do that.
I whole-heartedly agree with them, but I will take it further in reminding our community that we do have a space where we can and do tell our own stories -- through our own LGBTQ+ newspaper. That space is here -- LGBTQ San Diego County News.
That is why as publisher, I am working with a local team of dedicated writers, graphic designers, photographers, printers, and small businesses to build a strong future for local LGBTQ journalism. It’s why you now see local businesses and nonprofits with a renewed interest in our advertising packages. They understand that the state of democracy and civic engagement only works with informed communities. And they understand that help needs to come from many sources, including civic leaders, local and national foundations, local businesses, and our community members themselves. But those actions aren’t enough.
Please consider supporting LGBTQ San Diego County News. We are one of just a handful of California based LGBTQ+ newspapers that are still in print. Donate. Subscribe. And if you have a business or an organization that’s able to, Advertise with us. Your support is critical to sustaining the dedicated journalists serving our communities.
Our local LGBTQ newspaper helps keep us safer. We keep an eye on city hall, on corruption, and shady business practices -- including being transparent about the issues facing our paper and how we ended up in this position.
As publisher of this paper, I want you -- our community, our advertisers, and our subscribers – to know that we have corrected and updated our circulation numbers, are working to resolve and meet some of the deliverables that this paper was under contract to meet through the grant that was received before I took over, and in discussions with our legal team on how to best resolve and report on the issues that have endangered our publication.
You have my word that in the coming weeks and months we will share more information as it becomes available to us. and that I will do my best to help ensure that this publication can continue to print. I want you to know that we have a team of talented staff and editors that are putting in the time and effort to build up this paper and to provide our community with local and relevant news, and a space to tell our own stories.
Please subscribe, donate, and advertise. With your help, together we can ensure our local news is covered for years to come. ▼
LGBTQ San Diego County News P.O. Box 34664 San Diego, CA 92163 858-886-9458
PUBLISHER
Eddie Reynoso publisher@lgbtqsd.news
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF
Morgan M. Hurley editor@lgbtqsd.news
CREATIVE DIRECTOR
Jerod Thompson
COMMUNITY EDITOR
Benny Cartwright community@lgbtqsd.news
STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER
Big Mike Phillips
WEB AND SOCIAL MEDIA info@lgbtqsd.news
ADVERTISING SALES sales@lgbtqsd.news 858-886-9458
SENIOR COLUMNIST
Nicole Murray Ramirez
CONTRIBUTING WRITERS
Korie Houston
Michael Kimmel
Connor Maddocks
Mike Phillips
Neal Putnam
Frank Sabatini Jr.
Patric Stillman
PUBLISHER EMERITUS
Terry Sidie
David Mannis
ASSOC. PUBLISHER
EMERITUS
Nicole Murray Ramirez
SUBMISSIONS / NEWS
TIPS
For tips, stories, letters to the editor, or other media inquiries, email editor@lgbtqsd.news.
REPRESENTATIVE
DISTRIBUTION
LGBTQ San Diego County News is distributed free monthly. © 2023. All Rights Reserved.
EDITOR’S NOTE
The opinions written in this publication’s advertorial, editorial and opinion pages are the author’s own and does not necessarily represent the opinions of the staff and/or publisher of LGBTQ San Diego County News. The newspaper and its staff should be held harmless of liability or damages.
This publication was supported in part by funding provided by the State of California, administered by the California State Library.
Additional support in part has been provided by funding from the City of San Diego.
6 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS OPINION
Letters
Editor’s Note: We accept and encourage letters to the editor, and we curate our “letters” from emails, snail mail, Facebook, and comments on our website. However, we reserve the right to publish – or not to publish – any particular submission or comment, and if we do choose to publish, it does not mean that we align or agree with the writer’s intentions, assertions or allegations.
Tall Shoulders [Ref: Vol. 4, Issue 21, “The Shoulders I Stand Upon: Hal Frost and the early years of the Brass Rail,” or online at bit.ly/3QVIwpJ.]
Mother Hal, Thank you for believing in me and our community. I am proud to say I was one of the few that was blessed to have been there during this time. I personally think Hal deserves a bigger and greater honor from our community. He was an outstanding man and he was my friend. Love you Mother Hal, Thank you for your love.
–Fernando Lara Jr, via lgbtqsd.news
Hal was an incredible human and gave so much to our community. Happy to have got to know him. Big Mike, I see so much of Hal in you, your kind heart and willingness to help, listen and love. Beautiful story, thanks for sharing.
–Chris Walsh, via lgbtqsd.news
Thank you for sharing that history Mike and keeping Hal in our memory.
–Rick Kerman, via lgbtqsd.news
Great story and brings back memories of my youth in San Diego. Those were the best of times. Now I have become a senior and look back with fondness. I hope the history of our community continues to be preserved to give today’s youth in our community a sense of continuity.
–Jim, via lgbtqsd.news
Wonderful story, Big Mike! I was lucky enough to get meet and know Hal as a young 20-something gay when I first started going out and he was in his final days at The Brass Rail. Great guy. Also, love that your San Diego anniversary date is Aug. 18! That’s also my mom’s birthday (this year she’ll be 70) so there are multiple things to celebrate on that date :).
–Benny Cartwright, via lgbtqsd.news
Loving the artist’s process
[Ref: Vol. 4, Issue 21, “Artist Profile: Cuauhtémoc Kish,” or online at bit.ly/3L2J2yf.]
Awesome story to capture the beauty, creativity and diversity of this fabulous person as an artist. I have the honor of knowing him personally and seeing his work. It is fascinating to listen to him describe his art and what inspired him to create a particular piece. Thank you for featuring this artist as we got to follow him through his many journeys in life.
–Susan Brinsko, via lgbtqsd.news
Human Relations fail
[Ref: Vol. 4, Issue 21, “About Commissioners’ Homophobic/ Antisemitic Remarks,” or online at bit.ly/44zD2E6.]
Thank you for standing by the Jewish community. While we are only 2% of the USA population, we are 50% of religious hate crimes nationally. Jewish organizations should definitely be given some seats on the Commission.
– Robin Tyler, via lgbtqsd. news ▼
7 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS OPINION
AIDS Walk: We walked to save lives
The main reason I came to San Diego was because my best friend Tino Graziano was living and dying of full-blown AIDS and I did not want him to die alone (see LGBTQ San Diego County News Volume 4, Issue 15, or online at bit.ly/3OfEtl7).
Tino died three months after my arrival in San Diego, on Nov. 18, 1989. After his death, I promised myself that I would do everything I could to give back to all the organizations that were there for Tino to live with dignity and love. As I was growing and learning in this new community of Hillcrest, one of the biggest fundraisers was AIDS Walk. This was right up my alley; I could commit to helping others like Tino who were also dealing with this horrible disease.
I know AIDS is a depressing subject to talk about, but it is important to tell the history of all the people who had to die from this disease, rather than just act like it never happened. As September approaches as I write this, so does AIDS Walk.
According to the AIDS Network, “Walk” type campaigns became a primary source of funding and response to HIV/ AIDS from the early days of the epidemic. “The world’s first AIDS Walk fundraiser was organized by AIDS Project Los Angeles in 1985, with a goal of raising $100,000. They achieved that goal and then some, raising over $600,000, with thousands of walkers participating. Walk fundraisers have been an important part of our history and continue to be an important part of our ever changing and evolving movement.”
Sadly, so many of us were watching our close friends, along with the hundreds of thousands of others, being murdered
everyday by this depressing disease. We could do absolutely nothing to help our brothers who were catching the AIDS virus and then dying. Some died quickly and others lived in great pain; at the same time our society was terrified to even come close to showing compassion, love, or just plain kindness. Especially those first several years, because no one really knew what they could do safely to keep from catching the disease themselves. We all were scared.
In those early years, the University of California San Diego (UCSD) Hospital and many of their doctors were considered some of the best with their research of HIV/AIDS in the U.S., and are still are to this day (now UC San Diego Health).
I was diagnosed with HIV the same day Tino was diagnosed with AIDS; we went together to get tested back in San Antonio, Texas, in early 1984. I had never been so scared in my life to receive that news that day, and when I heard that Tino had full blown AIDS, I cried like a baby, my heart was saddened, not knowing if we both may die.
Tino did die four years after he was diagnosed. I have now lived with HIV for 39 years and I thank God every single day that I am still here.
Being a new face, lost, scared, in a new environment, a new city, and making new friends, I did the little things I could, mostly donating money to AIDS fundraisers. As I mentioned in the beginning of this column, I heard of AIDS Walk. This made me excited that I could participate in making a difference myself to honor my best friend and so many others that we had lost from this disease.
I remember it was the early 1990s and I was bartending at the Brass Rail. I asked my manager Hal Frost if the bar would consider putting together a team to raise money and do the walk; Hal agreed immediately. “In fact,” he said, “why don’t you take charge and lead the efforts?” I gladly and proudly took on this responsibility.
I had never ever asked anyone for money before this experience. I was so nervous to ask, so I decided to make it easy for me and the people I would be asking. I started with my afternoon customers at the Brass Rail, and just asked for a $1 donation. What I found was that people wanted to do something and by only asking for a dollar, even that dollar made them feel that they were also making a difference, and most people gave me much more than $1.
So everywhere I went, I’d explain that I was collecting money for AIDS Walk and ask if they would donate at least a dollar, and people would always respond with generosity. I felt good and was excited to witness so much love and care toward my first real involvement getting others and myself to support a cause I totally believed in.
I do remember I raised over $2,000 that very first time. Boy, did I feel good, and everyone on the bar staff did well raising money, too, and as a group we reached our goal. Then we walked, which was the first time I had ever walked. Every year after that I was proud and excited to take part in raising money for AIDS Walk. Being a bartender, it was easy to be part of a team that would not only raise money but be proud to walk as well.
wanted to help local HIV/AIDS organizations with funding.
As told by Susan Jester on the AIDS Walk website, “The Los Angeles AIDS Walk had started, and I saw a need, I saw our people going up there to the L.A. Walk when we so desperately needed funds here. That angered me, too, and I just got it in my head that we could do a walk here. I met with Nicole Murray Ramirez and then David Coppini, and Rob Merrill and I found one of the consultants that had worked on AIDS Walk L.A. and asked if they would help us; show us how it worked. Ken Martin helped, Chris Shaw, all these guys really stepped up, and we did this out of my garage.”
Everyone was a volunteer who committed their time to make this a labor of love. So, with the help of their volunteers, these three amazing individuals produced the first Walk for Life.
when no one applied, Tim asked Barbra Blake to take on the E.D. position.
At the time, Barbra was working in biotech researching the AIDS virus and was also the executive director of Pride at the same time. However, Barbra agreed to take the position and did so with Tim’s help for the next couple of years. For the first few years, they would register those who walked in front of the County Administration Building, and then they would walk down Pacific Highway to Harbor Island and back, where they were greeted by the Girl Scouts at the finish line.
Thanks to Carol LeBeau, a news anchor with Channel 10 News, the station became AIDS Walk’s first major media sponsor. Because of their outreach, funds raised were also able to help smaller AIDS organizations and even those in Tijuana.
As I write this column, I started thinking about what AIDS Walk means to me personally; I have always believed it gives us an opportunity to remember those we love and all those who lost their lives because of this horrible disease. It’s a chance to bring people together to learn, tell stories of those that were taken from us, and educate those who have no idea of the pain, struggles, and how our own community had to take up this fight alone in those early days.
It’s also a time to say thank you to our Blood Sisters, women like Wendy Sue Biegeleisen, Nicolette Ibarra, Barbara Vick, and Bridget Wilson, to name a few. They organized the women in our community to donate blood, because very few men could at that time. It’s a time to say thank you to the doctors and nurses who never gave up on those that had to battle this disease. To all the volunteers, especially the lesbian women who would go to the AIDS wards in the hospitals and take patients the trays of food that were laying on the floor outside their rooms in the hallways.
For those of us who lived in those times, and lost loved ones from AIDS, it was a sad time. Going to funerals every week was more than heartbreaking and depressing. Many individuals who did not have AIDS even lost family and friends, because they were related to or knew someone with AIDS; they were also discriminated against and people were afraid to be around them thinking they would get infected, as well. It was a very scary time in our history and something I pray we never ever have to go through again.
The story of AIDS Walk San Diego begins in 1985, with three individuals – Susan Jester, Albert Bell, and Gary Rees – who
Nicole Murray Ramirez, along with the San Diego Imperial Court, were the first sponsors, donating seed money to make sure this event would be a reality. You must remember in those dark early days, no one would write checks that would have the word AIDS on them. That’s why it was called “Walk for Life.” It was not easy, even with the first walk, with people screaming negative homophobic slurs out of their cars and booing the people who were brave enough to walk. But that did not stop those who did walk.
After “Walk for Life,” a group of San Diegans formed a new board in 1989, which was a totally separate identity from the first established AIDS Walk as a 501(c)3 nonprofit, starting the long journey to what is now AIDS Walk and Run San Diego.
Individuals who formed the founding board were Scott Fulkerson, who was the executive director of the Gay and Lesbian Center at that time; Joe Mayer; Christine Kehoe (before she got into politics); Jeri Dilno; Doug Moore; Phyllis Jackson; Carole Norman; and Vertez Burke.
The board quickly realized they needed to hire a professional event coordinator to run AIDS Walk, so they hired a gentleman by the name of Tim Williams, who was paid almost nothing, like $2,000 a year. Tim took this responsibility on for two years, and right away asked his two closest friends – Maryanne Travaglione and Barbra Blake – to volunteer and help him with outreach. Together they concentrated on talking with churches of color, college fraternities, businesses, and anyone else who would listen. Then sadly, Tim found out that he had AIDS. He knew they needed to find a new executive director, so they put out the word, but
I remember in those early years, it was probably the mid- or late-1990s when Bob Mozzi was the executive director, he stepped down shortly after I got to know him. Thanks to Terry Cunningham who has committed his life to AIDS, took over as interim executive director until they could find a replacement. I am still learning about and remembering those years.
In 2003, the San Diego LGBT Community Center took over AIDS Walk, and it became one of their biggest fundraisers. It has been led and coordinated ever since through the hard work of The Center staff and hundreds of volunteers.
In 2007, Ian Johnson joined The Center as their coordinator and has taken the lead on AIDS Walk for as long as I can remember. This year will be the last year The Center will produce AIDS Walk.
As was told to me: “AIDS Walk San Diego is being reimagined and will include specific outreach events throughout the year, [such as] events targeted to younger community members, and storytelling events that folks living with HIV will be able to share to help reduce stigma. The funding recipients will continue to be a priority for The Center.”
To everyone involved since the very beginning of “Walk for Life,” until today, thank you for giving us hope and a way to remember
8 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS COMMUNITY VOICES
(top) Walkers and their team “shoes” make it across the finish.
Big Mike was able to fundraise from behind the bar.
(l to r) Susan Jester and Nicole Murray Ramirez, then and now.
See AIDS WALK page 12
It’s the right time to get involved
Every year, as summer is ending and people start back to their routines, I am often asked by many community members how they can get involved. People know that I’ve been significantly involved in the community and city politically, civically, and socially, for over two decades and when they get a spark for getting involved, they often come to me.
I spend a lot of time responding to messages from people or meeting over drinks or coffee (iced tea for me!) for one-on-ones to learn more about what the person’s interests and passions are, so I can give them customized recommendations on people they should network with and organizations they should consider engaging with. I love doing this!
People, Politics and Opinions
Toni Atkins for Lt. Governor!
San Diego’s Toni Atkins has already started a campaign for Lt. Governor in 2026. She is termed out in the State Senate and will leave her historic position as
And sometimes, bringing me great pride, people take me up on my recommendations and find themselves immersed in the community. I get even more excited when people come back to me years later, when I didn’t even realize that they got involved in the community, to thank me for helping them take that first step and sharing with me all the great things they have done. Those are my proudest moments in my community work.
But far too often, people thank me immensely for sharing with them and then once life gets busy again, they lose that initial spark they had and go back to their normal routines. Others try to get involved with the community but find a lot of barriers to getting involved -- barriers that are placed by many of the very organizations and people who publicly encourage others to get engaged in their community. I’ll write more on that another day, but it’s another major reason many people who want to join a board, run for office, or even simply volunteer, just give up.
And these people who are often let down and turned off from getting involved – be it because of barriers placed by the “insiders” or just the complexities of finding their way in a community full of different organizations, leaders, and insiders – are usually very smart, capable individuals with incredible experiences that would benefit the community.
By the way, when I speak of community, it can mean anything: your neighborhood, an identity-based community like LGBTQ, your city, or even a group of people who have formed
President Pro Tempore of the California State Senate, the first female elected to that position in the history of California. Toni has served as a City Councilmember, Council President, Interim Mayor, Speaker of the State Assembly, etc. She is one of the most qualified elected officials currently in our state capital and many are urging her to run for Governor!
I first met Toni in the 1980s when she worked at a women’s health clinic in Ocean Beach and the Imperial Court and I helped her raise money for women’s health needs. My slogan was “The Pink Ribbon should be as important to us as the red one is!”
The San Diego UnionTribune Sold Again
There was a time that the Union-Tribune was the most powerful paper in San Diego County. Its endorsement of a candidate usually meant that candidate would win.
The Union-Tribune was very anti-homosexual, even though the owner’s son was one big sissy queen and its main popular columnist was a gay man. When AIDS came, they ran very homophobic cartoons and editorials. We even picketed the Union-Tribune because they used to run the name, place of work, occupation,
a community around a common interest.
I pay a lot of attention to local politics and the issues that hit closest to home. So many of my friends and neighbors are really struggling with the incredibly high cost of living in San Diego, have conflicting feelings about the unhoused community and its effects, and feel like their voices are not being heard by any level of government or leadership.
Friends and neighbors on social media regularly share about having to move out of their current residence due to rent increases or their building be torn down to make way for something new – which is probably out of their price range.
People worry about a whole host of issues that affect them at the local, state, and national levels, and feel absolutely helpless to make a change or get involved. They think there is a class of people who run things and we just have to live with it. And of course, there is some truth to that, especially in our system where the wealthy-poor divide is becoming greater and greater.
But at the most local levels, YOU have the absolute opportunity to get involved and share your voice. And there are a lot of political insiders on both ends of the political spectrum who don’t want you to know that. San Diegans have historically been pretty apathetic about local politics and there are some pretty powerful groups on all sides of the aisle who have managed to spend a lot of money in elections and lobbying to hold the power. And we haven’t always seen the best results.
etc., anytime a homosexual got arrested or “entrapped” by the police department.
Now the Union-Tribune, like other major city newspapers, is having difficult times and has been sold a few times in recent years. In the last few years, the Union-Tribune has changed and become more progressive and pro-LGBTQ equality. Tyler Renner and Fernando Lopez are now seeing their commentaries being run regularly and have established good relationships with the editor.
San Diego AIDS Memorial
The San Diego AIDS Memorial is moving along nicely with a 2024 fall dedication looking like it will happen on time. We have been working on this for over 35 years and three mayors. Finally, we will all have a place to go to remember so many we have lost. Former First Lady of San Diego Katherine Stuart
It doesn’t have to be this way. Everyone has a right to get involved, be it in a local community association, a community planning group, a city or county board or commission, and even a run for office. And of course, the best way to make your voice heard is to vote, vote often, and vote critically.
Remember, no one knows who you vote for (unless you tell others) so if you feel that a change needs to be made with whomever represents you, vote accordingly!
And if you’re not seeing the representation that is speaking to your interests, step up – or encourage that friend of yours who is always talking about running for office to step up.
Our day-to-day lives are greatly affected by the decisions made at the most local levels, be it city councils, county boards of supervisors, and even water and schools boards. We are at a time in history where “politics as usual” is not working anymore, and we need people with fresh ideas, perspectives, and who are not connected to the establishment to get involved with these processes.
Those who think it sounds overwhelming to just jump into running for office right away, have so many ways to learn and get their feet wet, first. Volunteering for a campaign is one of the best ways to do so, but also consider running for a seat on a community planning group. These advisory boards make recommendations to the city (or county, depending on what area the body is in) on land use issues. These groups operate like mini councils and you are able to learn
Faulconer and I are still co-chairs of the AIDS Memorial Task Force. Word Is . . .
On the subject of Tyler Renner, he is still looking like a frontrunner to follow Councilmember Stephen Whitburn. Javier Gomez is looking at the ninth district seat and is already lining up support. While many are really disappointed in Janessa Goldbeck’s loss for County Board of Supervisors, many hope she does not give up on running
quite a bit how land use decisions are made. Those who care about how their community will look and feel over the next 10, 20, or 30 years should definitely check one of these out.
Speaking of planning groups, the Uptown Planners is the local planning board for the area that encompasses part of University Heights, Hillcrest, Bankers Hill, Mission Hills, and Middletown. This board has had quite a few shake ups in the last few years and we need good folks to bring some reason back to the board.
I happen to be running for a seat in their special election happening on Saturday, Sept. 2 and Tuesday, Sept. 5, and if you live in the Uptown area, I’d really appreciate your vote. Information about voting is at bit. ly/UPElection23
That aside, this fall, I really encourage you to think about what concerns you most about any community you are a part of and how you can jump in to make a difference. The sky’s the limit and there is no one stopping you. Some will try, but there will be an equal number of people rooting you on. And I am always happy to meet with you to discuss ways you can take your spark to the next level -- even if you end up losing the spark or going in a different direction.
Let’s get you involved and make change in our communities! My contact information is in the bio section below this column. Lots of love!
–Benny Cartwright is a longtime activist and community leader. Reach him at community@ lgbtqsd.news. Follow him on Instagram @BennyC80. ▼
for office someday. Popular Lauren Cazares is considered a frontrunner for her La Mesa City Council seat. And Navy/ Marine veteran Joseph Rocha is considered the clear frontrunner for California State Assembly District 76.
–Nicole Murray Ramirez is a lifelong Latino and LGBT activist and advocate, a longtime city commissioner, and is the Queen Mother of the International Imperial Court of the Americas. He can be reached at nicolemrsd1@gmail.com.
9 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS COMMUNITY VOICES
Javier Gomez Tyler Renner (Courtesy NMR)
▼
10 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS
AdvocatesWho and What Are They?
For this month’s column, I thought I’d write a bit about individual advocacy. Let’s start with discussing what advocacy means.
According to Webster Merriam Dictionary, the word has three meanings:
1. One who defends or maintains a cause or proposal.
2. One who supports or promotes the interests of a cause or group.
3. One who pleads the cause of another.
The definition I am going to discuss in this article is the third one, “pleading the cause of another.”
As we negotiate our own transitions it is usually a very crooked path, often with starts and stops. Until we are connected with resources within our own community, it can be very difficult to know which path to take first. Everyone’s transition is deeply personal and there are so many decisions to be made.
As most of us know, there is no right or wrong way to go. There is no “one size fits all” for us. There are so many directions one could go, including legal options, such as name and gender changes, updating paperwork and identity documents, like driver’s licenses, passports, and birth certificates. There are personal considerations, such as who to tell, and deciding when it is the right time to tell. Employment considerations and how to navigate those are also on the list of things, which goes on and on.
It is helpful to find a person who knows the ropes, who has been through it all and has taken it upon themselves to be educated on current resources and which local medical professionals can help you. You may have questions like “Is this a good endocrinologist?” or “How about this top surgeon (or bottom surgeon)?” or “primary care docs? mental health professionals?” If you decide to medically transition, knowing the answers to these questions can be the difference between having truly amazing supportive care, or entering a nightmare that can literally put you in a cycle of bad medical care, delays in your transition, or even push you right over the edge.
First you want to try and find your people. Who in San Diego can help get you started?
Search for trans and non-binary specific groups. Check the San Diego LGBT Community Center’s website at thecentersd.org. Call the San Diego Pride office. Search online. If you know anyone in the community, ask them. Call 211. Groups can be scary at first but be brave, reach out and give it a try. Even if a group is not for you, get information from someone in the group who you can contact with questions.
Find someone who is willing to help you and work with you. That is your advocate. If someone says they are willing to help, get assistance from them. Don’t think you are bothering them or taking their time. This is most likely the most important time of your life, and there is no need to go at it alone. Finding an advocate is one of the best gifts you can give yourself.
Once you have someone, be clear with what you need. At different times during transition your needs will change. There may be times you need a lot of direction, and other times where you are going along swimmingly by yourself.
It’s kind of like what AA members do for each other, a person finds a sponsor and then they will always have someone to lean on, learn from and be listened to. If after a time that sponsor is not responding to you, or you just don’t vibe with them or something just feels off, it’s ok to thank them and move on to another person. Doing that is called self-advocacy. Really, the ball is in your court. Don’t sit around feeling sad and hopeless, get back in the game and try someone different. Not availing yourself of all possible options can cause depression, anxiety, and hopelessness, and no one wants to be in that space.
What can you expect from a good advocate? Not all those willing to be an advocate will know everything about everything, but they should at least know enough to steer you to someone who can help on the issues that concern you. The person should be kind, understanding, willing to lend an ear when you need it and help you become more involved with the community. They should not be controlling, bossy, closed minded, unkind or have opinions and values that clash with yours. You should be comfortable talking to them, spending time with them and feeling good about the information they may share with you. Make sure you vibe with them and feel comfortable. If your advocate violates confidentiality, that is a huge violation of advocacy trust and I would immediately find a new one.
If you want to become an advocate, you should take it upon yourself to learn as much about the community as possible. Know who the trans-informed physicians are, and who the most knowledgeable gender therapists are. Educate yourself about insurances, especially Medi-Cal. Know the rights of trans and non-binary people and what those rights and protections are – at state, city and federal levels. This website is a great source for learning about medical advocacy: cahealthadvocates.org
Anyone you designate can be your advocate. They may accompany you to a hospital
emergency room, doctor’s visits, and really any facility where you are receiving treatment. Your advocate can make sure you are getting the best care, in a timely manner, with respect and privacy.
By the way, the reason I am sharing this today is because of a recent experience I had at a local emergency room. I was transported to the ER by ambulance due to severe back pain and muscle spasms. A friend followed me there. After answering the doctor’s questions and telling him my pain level was 10, he ordered blood tests. After that initial encounter, I did not see him again until two and a half hours later, when he came to discharge me. I was in so much pain and kept asking for help but I was ignored by the doctor, the nurse and other staff members.
At one point I had to use the restroom, but there was no call button, and when I yelled out for the nurse, I was ignored. I started to try and climb off the end of the bed, and when she saw me, she came running over, yelling at me for trying to get up. She then got me a walker to use to get to the restroom and then just turned around and left me there.
When I got back to the bed she came and helped get me in, then immediately left again before I could ask about something for the pain. I was in so much pain I had forgotten that my friend was in the waiting room. Initially they told him he could not come back to the patient area. Then he was told to give them 10 minutes or so before coming back. Approximately 2 hours later, after I had been crying and calling out for help, they gave me some muscle relaxers. And 20 minutes after that, they gave me morphine for the pain. Another 15 minutes later, the doctor came in and said he wanted to discharge me. So many violations.
I did file a complaint with the hospital, but my fear is that nothing will actually be done. Why was I treated this way? Was it because I was trans? Was it because they considered me a “drug seeker?” I will never know. My friend was there to drive me home and we talked about what could have been done differently. We all need to know that he could have insisted to be let back with me, because he was my patient advocate.
Tell whoever comes along with you to the hospital, doctors’ office, or other medical providers, to introduce themselves as your advocate, because essentially at that moment that is exactly who they are. Do not be afraid to push back against any healthcare professional who is treating you poorly. We have patient rights in every hospital. Know them and protect yourself, know them and be a great advocate for your friends, families, other community members and yourself.
–Connor Maddocks (he, him, his) is a Transgender activist, trainer, speaker, and advocate. You can reach him at neon411@ gmail.com. ▼
Closure? I hardly know her
Houston we have a problem. It’s the lies we tell to comfort ourselves and others. The desire for answers but not knowing the reality. Is closure actually attainable or is it just a fantasy? I’ve tackled authenticity, heartbreak, and now I want to dive into what it means to put yourself back out there and to live on the edge of rejection.
Being within this community, I’m confident that so many of us have lived the same lives. Some of the same experiences leading to formative decisions about who we are and why we do the things that we do. But what does it mean when those choices come at a cost? The inevitability that you’ll hurt someone you care for. Do you believe in closure? I’m not sure I do anymore.
Those conversations when deciding to end something that has run its course come with so many challenges. Asking yourself questions like, “Do I want to see them hurt?”; “Did I rush into this?”; and, “Is it me or is it them?”
I would rather hear honesty than be comforted by empty words. I’ve been broken up with, ghosted, and led on in my time, and I have a plethora of stories I could share. Getting out of the mindset that all responsibility falls on my shoulders is why I don’t truly believe in closure.
Story time: This time you’re getting two tales – one old and one new.
I briefly dated a man, we’ll call him Elfbar, on account of the one time he casually decided to ask my friends in the most “bro” sounding voice, “Do you vape?” It was a wild time back in 2014.
For all intents and purposes, I genuinely cared about this man. He was witty, interesting to connect with, and an all-around nice guy. That being said, nice doesn’t stop them from breaking your heart. right? We were seeing each other for two months before he had an emergency one night after work. He had accidentally inhaled something with peanuts, and he was deeply allergic. I didn’t hear from him for about two weeks after a little stint in the hospital.
Well, lo and behold, he was back on our favorite cesspool Grindr, with a new addition to his bio: “not into black guys.” Obviously, that stung. If you thought this story was over, it’s not. He reached out to me a few months later because I had left
a necklace at his place. Spoiler alert, I never saw that necklace again. He asked if I wanted to go to dinner, so he could talk and explain himself; I said sure, name a time and place. We set a date, and on the day of said date, he sends me a Snapchat of him and his new man. I just wanted my necklace back; the same way Damian from Mean Girls wanted his pink shirt back. Closure who?
As you can see, I’ve never had the best luck in dating. Which brings me to my next story: A man who runs swiftly towards his next step while simultaneously running away from his problems. You could use that to describe me, or to describe a man I dated who I won’t coin a nickname for, because I do think he’s a genuine person and I believe in the best version of him.
We met at Number One on Fifth on a now particularly infamous evening in my friend circle, due to the people it brought in and out of my life. To speed this process up, he was just getting out of something, and I should have known better than to think it would end up better than it did. I wasn’t entirely sure of what I wanted, and he wasn’t entirely sure of what we were doing. But the chemistry felt real, and the emotions were sincere. It just wasn’t the right moment, and I was inevitably ghosted.
As we know from my previous story, I have a tendency to leave things behind in men’s homes. Why, you ask? Because I’m incredibly forgetful. We spent almost a month trying to find a time to return my items, but we didn’t try that hard, if I’m being honest, and we finally met up to have that “final” conversation. It just made me think, what was the point of this? Did we need to start something that would never be finished? For whose gratification, his or mine? I was left feeling bewildered, and wondering, was it me?
One of these stories happened when I was 18 and the other happened when I was 27 turning 28. Almost a decade apart and in that time, I’ve lived a lifetime of highs and lows. Why don’t I believe in closure? Because in both conversations – one I led and the other I allowed – it felt as if I was just told pretty things wrapped up in a bow before opening the package to find it was empty. You’re free to challenge me with your own ideas of what closure means to you, but all I’ve gained from a lot of these situations is acknowledging time and energy went into something that wasn’t fruitful.
If you asked me several months ago whether I felt that I had learned any lessons from these situations, I’d have said, “No, f**k all of these people,” but the truth is, I’ve learned a lot about what I need and what I want. Continuing to prioritize myself and my desires is above all else more important than losing myself to a situation that’s not worth the time.
I think I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to gain a sense of closure to navigate why I don’t believe in it. It’s ironic, isn’t it? I need to find a way to end a chapter on something that at times feels like it is never ending. What helps you find a sense of finality through heartache?
See CLOSURE page 15
11 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS
LGBTQSD.news COMMUNITY VOICES
The Third Third of your Life
Some people break down life into the “first half” (birth until 45-ish) and the second half (45 to death). I find it more useful to look at life in thirds. The first third is birth to 30; the second third is 30 to 60 and the third third is 60 to 90 (or beyond).
Today, I’ll focus on the third third, when we – hopefully –become LGBTQ elders. Being an “elder” is not defined by age, elders are recognized because they have earned the respect of their community through the wisdom, kindness, and support they embody and share with everyone around them. When you look at it that way, who wouldn’t want to be an elder?
Remembering Pee-wee
1 Leopold or Loeb
2 R.E.M.’s “The ___ Love”
3 29-Across, for example
4 Laid-back sort
5 Buck feature
6 Susan of “Valley of the Dolls”
7 Jack, who licked it clean
8 Key opening 9 Decide on 10 Most in need of a lube 11 Edible dildo?
Senator Trent
’69
Side
How does retirement fit into this? The word used to mean “not working,” typically starting around age 65. In my research, I learned that the word “retire” (from the French, mid-16th century) originally meant “to withdraw to a place of safety or seclusion.” That’s a pretty awful vision for your third third of life. And yet, that’s just what many people do: Isolate. Withdraw. Disappear.
No surprise that this is typically associated with early death: why stick around if it’s going to suck so much?
FROM PAGE 8
AIDS WALK
For context, I like to look at sociologist Erik Erikson’s eight stages of human development, from birth to Elderhood. Each stage highlights a psychosocial “challenge” to work through in that stage of life. The eight stages flow chronologically: every stage is dependent upon the outcome of the one before (age ranges are approximate):
TRUST vs. MISTRUST: 0–2 years
Can I trust the world and feel safe and loved? Or do I feel unsafe, insecure and abandoned?
AUTONOMY vs. SHAME/ DOUBT: 2–4 years
Is it okay to be me? Can I create my self-identity and have independence too?
INITIATIVE vs. GUILT: 5–8 years
Is it okay to be myself in my family? Can I start solving problems on my own and figuring stuff out? Can I enjoy being myself or am I guilt-tripped into becoming who my family wants me to be?
INDUSTRY vs.
INFERIORITY: 9–12 years
Can I make it in the wider world, like at school, sports or community theater? Can I learn how to think and do things for myself and my community, or do I just not feel good enough?
IDENTITY vs. ROLE
CONFUSION: 13–19 years
“Who am I really?” – we wonder, looking at peers and role models as we develop our identities, through introspection and social relationships.
INTIMACY vs. ISOLATION: 20–39 years
“Can I love and be loved?” – is the question as we develop deep friendships and romantic relationships.
GENERATIVITY vs. STAGNATION: 40–59 years
“How do I make my life really count?” – we ask, exploring relationships, social responsibility and our physical/social/spiritual environment.
EGO INTEGRITY vs. DESPAIR: 60+
by raising millions of dollars that have benefited so many. Thank you to all who carried the thousands of banners with the names of those who died from AIDS during all these years.
I know that I am blessed to still be here on earth and I am grateful every single day of my life to have such a blessing. But it is the millions of people from all over the world who had to die from the AIDS virus: They are the “why.” We’ve walked to remember them. It was their sacrifice that brought society together so we could now be at a place in time where people can live longer and healthier lives. I believe a lot of that stems from all the individuals who started
Here is the third third, where we look back over our lives (so far), wonder if we did a good job becoming our own unique selves, and ask how our existence impacted others.
Integrity is about developing a set of core inner values that you live by, out of your own sense of what’s right for you, not because you’re afraid of what others might say or think.
The third third is a time of great change and can be exciting and adventurous … or, you can dread it and expect things to totally suck. Here are some questions to consider as you contemplate your own third third:
• As an LGBTQ elder, how will you exercise your mind for continued, personal learning?
• How will you deal with changes in income, health and purpose?
• How can you fill your life with fulfilling activities and interests at every age?
• Have you built and maintained enjoyable/ intimate relationships? If those people die or move away, how will you continue to make new friends/lovers?
• Are you able to manage family commitments to an aging partner or your parents, siblings and/or children?
• Where would you like to live now? Might a smaller, simpler home with less maintenance please you more?
If your third third is many years in the future, how can you set it up to be the best third of your life? If it’s coming soon, have you laid a good foundation? If you’re already an elder and it’s not what you’d hoped for, how can you adjust what you’ve already created?
–Michael Dale Kimmel is a local licensed psychotherapist (LCSW 20738) in private practice and an author. You can learn more about him and his work at lifebeyondtherapy.com.
these walks, the volunteers that helped raise not only money, but helped with research that provided medicine, education, and compassion, which so many loving and caring individuals are still showing every day.
HIV/AIDS is not over and we still haven’t found a cure, and I pray that one day there will be one, but until that day comes, I encourage everyone to continue to do their part.
With the leadership of Nicole Murray Ramirez, and after 30 years of hard work, soon we will finally have an AIDS Memorial Park to remember and honor all those who died, helped, and showed compassion during those dark days. Earlier this year, along with Mayor Todd Gloria, Nicole Murray Ramirez, elected officials, community leaders, community supporters, and the San Diego AIDS Memorial Park’s committee, I witnessed its groundbreaking. It was a great day. This will be a permanent place where the names of all the San Diegans who died of AIDS will rest and be remembered. Now, after all these years, to finally be able to give them a safe home that we all can visit, remember, and learn who they were. May they always Rest in Peace.
These are the shoulders I stand upon.
–Big Mike Phillips is a local photographer, bartender, and longtime LGBT activist and fundraiser. You can reach him at bmsd1957@gmail. com.
After nearly 40 years, this year’s final AIDS Walk takes place Sept. 30, starting at 8 a.m., at the San Diego LGBT Community Center in Hillcrest. To register, visit aidswalksd.org/about
12 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS COMMUNITY VOICES
▼
ACROSS 1 The bottom line 5 Facetious “I see” 9 In a queer way 14 Nothing but 15 Breaks for Heather’s mommies 16 Rap sheet item 17 Biweekly tide 18 Model Banks 19 Fouls, to the Pinball Wizard 20 Start of a Quote from Paul Reubens (1952-2023) 23 Sound from Mary’s little lamb 24 Med. center 25 Interjection for Magnus Hirschfeld 28 LAX letters 29 Tennis great Navratilova 32 Get in shape 34 What you may call your life partner 36 Unmannerly man 37 Gay-friendly veep Kamala 39 More of the quote 42 More of the quote 44 Grain grinders 45 Zips 46 Tag
…”
antagonists 47 Eva Gabor’s “Green ___” 48 Frequent Hudson costar 49 Where they rub you the right way 50 Killed, to King James 51 End of the quote 56 Opera singer Callas 59 Island of Barrie’s land 60 Middle of Caesar’s boast 61 One who often screws actors 62 His brother laid him in his grave 63 “She” to Bonheur 64 Symbols on Captain Hook’s flag 65 “___ lay me
66 Aspen vehicle DOWN
so!”
a knight
Conquers, sexually
Says further
The Unicorn author Murdoch
Pipe elbows
“Losing My Religion” singer 40 One who runs the show 41 Medium for Pride Vibes 43 Michelangelo, for one 47 Acid neutralizer 49 Takano and Baldwin hold them 50 Muscular strength 51 Langston Hughes’ “Life Is ___”
WNBA star Rebecca 53 “To ___ a Mockingbird” 54 “Spamalot” writer Eric 55 Bombed, on Broadway 56 Queen in “Romeo and Juliet”
“Fourscore and seven years ___ …”
Kevin Bacon in “Footloose” SOLUTIONS ON PAGE 15
12
13
and others 21 Gay marriage advocate Morissette 22 “West
Story” gang member 25 Where a j.o. buddy should be? 26 Bones that are the farthest up 27 “I don’t think
29 Chains around
30
31
33
35
38
52
57
58
Mayor Todd Gloria and Ian Johnson, longtime coordinator of AIDS Walk. (Photos courtesy Big Mike Phillips)
Mike Hess on expansion, philanthropy and LGBT “noise”
After recently opening a second taproom in Seaport Village and wrapping up the annual “Hess Fest” that raised money for Oncology and Kids, we caught up with entrepreneur and former Navy officer Mike Hess of Mike Hess Brewing Company to talk about his philanthropic efforts and the LGBT controversy that surrounded his business several months ago.
Hess launched his newest tap house this summer in Seaport Village, which sits a stone’s throw away from a satellite tasting room and kitchen that opened there a couple years ago. The new venture offers commodious outdoor seating and marks his seventh outpost; six of them are in San Diego County and one resides in Walnut Creek, California. All of the company’s craft beers are brewed at his North Park location.
A former resident of Rancho Penasquitos, Hess and his wife have since relocated to Bourne, Texas, although he returns to San Diego each month for a week to oversee operations. His success as one of our city’s early craft brewers allows him to donate around $150,000 a year to charities benefiting military veterans, kids with cancer, and service dogs.
“Those are our main focus,” he said.
In April, the dual digital network known as TheBattleCry_ US.com and PublicSq.com, which supports “freedom-loving businesses,” came out in opposition to Bud Light’s pro-trans campaign, which temporarily featured trans influencer Dylan
Mulvaney on its label. Amid the backlash, the site meshed together a glowing endorsement of Mike Hess Brewing with a message for consumers to “ditch and switch to businesses that value you.”
The post applauded Hess Brewing Company’s “traditional family values and exceptional hand-crafted beer.” And the LGBT community and its supporters were quick to respond across social media channels, accusing Hess of being both homophobic and transphobic.
“We didn’t endorse it,” Hess insisted. “We were tagged in the post and I’m not getting involved in the fray. This was all a niche minority making a bunch of noise,” he added.
When asked if he subscribes to BattleCry_US and PublicSq as an online member, he firmly responded, “no” before pointing out nonetheless that Anheuser-Busch “lost millions in market sales” over its Bud Light partnership with Mulvaney.
Hess went on to emphasize that his brewery and tasting rooms welcome LGBT families. He also noted, “We have LGBT on staff.”
When also asked if he has ever donated to any political organizations or civil-rights causes, he again answered “no” and preferred returning to the topic of his philanthropy.
“All people need to do is to see our brand and website as to where we stand. What we do is different in that we are purposely philanthropic every single day,” he said.
Other organizations that have benefited from Hess Brewing include The Girl Scouts of the USA and One More Wave, a surfing-therapy organization for veterans.
For more information visit mikehessbrewing.com
“Hate-free” chicken in Normal Heights
With a whimsically written menu in place and a passion for innovative cooking, chef Pete Servold and his wife Sarah, a creative marketer, are off to a brisk start with their new venture, Young Cluck
The eatery’s concise menu, which features a handful of breakfast and lunch options, is a result of the chef’s schooling at Le Cordon Bleu and his experience running the meal-prep company, Pete’s Real Food for the past 10 years.
The top seller at Young Cluck so far is the Southern fried chicken sandwich, which carries the tagline “hate free and served on Sundays.” As Servold explained, it’s an indirect prod to Chick-fil-A’s
A revision of 1980s-style Italian cuisine?
The Mexico City-based restaurant group, Grupo Hunan, has entered the San Diego market for the first time with the La Jolla opening of Lucrezia Lushly appointed with mature olive trees and hanging foliage, the designers took their cue from upscale restaurants along Italy’s Amalfi Coast.
Lucrezia’s website states that the menu offers twists on “80s Italian cuisine,” even though by most accounts, dishes such as arancini, veal Milanese, arrabbiata penne pasta and several others predate that particular decade. And many of the dishes actually adhere to classic tradition with perhaps the exceptions of shrimp scampi in salsa verde, and the intriguing salt-and-vinegar roasted potatoes that come with a half Jidori chicken.
Nonetheless, customers will encounter an array of tantalizing choices that include whole sea bass, baby lamb chops, various pizzas using imported herbs, and meaty Bolognese sauce that’s cooked for six hours.
The 10,000-square-foot restaurant is located in Westfield UTC mall. It replaces Larsen’s Steakhouse 4301 La Jolla Village Drive, Suite 1050, 858-352-6266, lucrezia.us
–Frank Sabatini Jr. has been writing about food in San Diego for over 35 years. He launched his own food blog during the pandemic, called, “The Hash Star,” which you can follow at thehashstar.com. He can be reached at frank.sabatini92108@gmail.com. ▼
record of donating to anti-LGBT groups and being closed on Sundays for religious worship.
Servold’s fried chicken is brined for 24 hours, pounded flat, and then double breaded in flour, cornstarch and buttermilk.
Other menu items include a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich added by Servold’s wife. It’s served on a Kaiser roll and based on the version that she came to love when living in Manhattan before the couple met.
There is also a “South in the grits” bowl with bacon, cheese and eggs, plus a grilled chicken banh mi sandwich using baguettes sourced from K Sandwiches in Clairemont.
The couple plans to open more locations over the next year in Pacific Beach, Mission Valley, or Clairemont, and possibly one in Del Mar. 3460 Adams Ave., 619-795-9995, youngcluck.com.
13 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS DINING
Dining within an Italian-style courtyard at Lucrezia (Courtesy ICONE)
Young Cluck’s Southern fried chicken sandwich (Courtesy photo)
Mike Hess at his North Park brewing facility (Courtesy H2 Public Relations)
Artist Profile: Colette Hebert –Capturing Life’s Emotions on Canvas
By Patric Stillman
Point Loma artist Colette Hebert stands as a recurring figure in the world of contemporary art, capturing the essence of human emotions and movement on canvas with a mastery that weaves together her love of visual art and dance. Her artistic journey spans countries, mediums, and influences, resulting in a body of work that not only resonates with viewers but also serves as a testament to the power of individual expression.
Hailing from Quebec in Eastern Canada, Hebert’s early connection with the art world was nurtured by her parents at a young age.
“I was the kind of child that stayed after school to draw on the bulletin boards with chalk,” Hebert said. “My parents enrolled me in private lessons at a local school of art. My passion for art only grew from there.”
A profound moment in her development was the opportunity to study under the eyes of master artist Leslie Shalk. Shalk shared everything he learned from his own mentor, the internationally beloved Henri Matisse. Hebert recognizes that Shalk’s time in her life continues to influence her own style of painting.
One of Hebert’s favorite artistic techniques that Shalk taught is “Lavis,” which translates to “Washed Ink” in English. The timeworn process creates black shapes on white backgrounds. Black ink is placed in small containers of water with increasing degrees of darkness. The artist controls the flow of the ink as it is poured onto the canvas to create an image. The idea is to capture the “spirit” of a shape without thinking too much. This is a time-honored process for artists to understand ink load, brushstrokes and texture.
Having spoken French since birth, it was natural for Hebert to start her European life in France. There, she soon discovered her second creative love, the Tango (editor’s note: the popular dance and music style that originated in the late 19th century in Buenos Aires, Argentina). Finding herself surrounded by Hispanic friends, Spanish quickly became her second language. Eventually, she mastered English when she returned to North America.
“Understanding different languages is a real gift,” Hebert said. “Each one has its own way of expression and thought. It’s very appealing for me to understand the world through the use of different languages.”
Attracted to warm weather, Hebert became a nomad with the seasons for two decades of her life, traveling from
Montreal to Cape Cod and eventually ending up in Miami for the winters.
Success as an artist came quickly for Hebert. Her work was selling all along the East Coast, which was helped in part because she was meeting patrons as she assisted the galleries that represented her artwork. With 20 summers in Provincetown showing work at Passions Gallery, she saw her work follow collectors across the US.
“I was never a starving artist,” she said. “In my late 20s, I was always busy creating new work. I had storage units in many cities that held my art so I could offer new paintings to the galleries along my annual travels.”
Hebert’s body of work is filled with a version of pour paintings on aluminum. She would contact newspapers in the cities where she lived so she could recycle the aluminum sheets that were used in the printing process. This unconventional canvas became the stage upon which Hebert orchestrated her intricate symphony of emotions.
“It was very convenient for me because aluminum sheets are very light,” she said. “I could travel with a stack of works wherever I went. I couldn’t have done that working on stretched canvases. It suited my lifestyle, moving with the warmth of the sun.”
Her expressive, figurative paintings stood out from her contemporaries because she was interested in creating an abstract field from the chemical process of pouring incompatible materials together. Using a spatula instead of a brush, Hebert mixed together gold leaf, oil, furniture stain, acrylics, and other media, which caused a reaction when they came together to create beautiful textures. This technique breathes life into her subjects, allowing their stories to unfold with every stroke.
“My art was always figurative,” Hebert said. “I loved to reveal the curves of the female form. Through the process, I would hide parts of the work with this abstract painting technique I developed. This continues to be the main way I work. It’s my signature that has evolved over the years. I find it quite beautiful.”
To the surprise of her close friends, she decided to give up painting and began to dance the Tango full time.
“Both give me great satisfaction. They offer the same creative release to me. I start with a ‘blank canvas’ and have the freedom to express myself through movement. You could say that the Tango allowed me to paint with my feet.”
It wasn’t long before she and her partner at the time became the 2003 U.S. Tango Champions. This opened up the
world to her as they performed across the globe in international cities like Tokyo, Madrid and Buenos Aires. San Diego soon became a regular destination three times a year, eventually becoming home.
At the heart of Hebert’s artistic revival stands her partner, Katerina. The turning point came when Katerina expressed a simple birthday wish for a painting from Hebert. This innocuous request served as a catalyst, reigniting Hebert’s passion for painting. It was an artistic reawakening that prompted her to rediscover the joy and depth that painting brought to her life. The experience illuminated the importance of maintaining a balance between her artistic pursuits, including her role as a Tango instructor at Liberty Station, and her innate desire to create visual art.
Hebert’s creations transcend mere visual appeal. They encapsulate the complexity of the human experience, particularly in the realm of feminine sensuality and movement. Each piece encapsulates a narrative, inviting viewers to embark on an introspective journey through layers of color, texture, and form. Her work resonates with universal emotions, encouraging viewers to connect with their feelings and experiences.
With a storied history of exhibitions in prestigious galleries, Hebert’s art has garnered admiration from diverse local audiences. Notably, her recent exhibition at In Gallery in Barrio Logan showcased her ability to capture the essence of the human spirit through her art. She was also featured at The Studio Door in two group exhibitions this year, including the prestigious PROUD+ national exhibition of LGBTQIA+ artists.
Hebert’s journey is an inspiring testament to the resilience and dedication of an artist who pours her soul onto the canvas. As she continues to evolve, her fusion of emotions, movement, and texture is bound to make an indelible mark on the art world.
Her message to art enthusiasts and appreciators is clear: remember her name, seek out her creations, and engage in a dialogue with her about art that transcends language.
Colette Hebert can be found online at colettehebertstudio.com and on Instagram at @colette_hebert_galerie
–Patric Stillman is a fine artist and gallery owner of The Studio Door. If you are an artist in San Diego’s LGBTQ+ community and would like to be featured in an artist profile, please contact Patric for consideration at patric@ thestudiodoor.com. ▼
14 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS ART
Movement 4
(All photos
courtesy of Colette Herbert)
Colette Herbert
Colette Herbert in the studio
Movement 1 Movement 2
Movement 3
from that on their birth certificate or other official records.
In addition, the policy requires parent notification if the student chooses to participate in programs or use facilities that do not align with their sex, as identified on official records.
Bonta is challenging this policy in court because he says it “violates the California Constitution and state laws safeguarding civil rights.”
“Every student has the right to learn and thrive in a school environment that promotes safety, privacy, and inclusivity – regardless of their gender identity,” Attorney General Bonta said. “We’re in court challenging Chino Valley Unified’s forced outing policy for wrongfully and unconstitutionally discriminating against and violating the privacy rights of LGBTQ+ students. The forced outing policy wrongfully endangers the physical, mental, and emotional well-being of non-conforming students who lack an accepting environment in the classroom and at home. Our message to Chino Valley Unified and all school districts in California is loud and clear: We will never stop fighting for the civil rights of LGBTQ+ students.”
In the lawsuit, Bonta outlined the state protections this policy infringes upon: California’s equal protection clause; California’s education and government code; and California’s right to privacy clause.
In addition, the lawsuit alleges that transgender and gender non-conforming students are in danger of imminent and
irreparable harm from the consequences of these forced outings.
“These students are currently under threat of being outed to their parents against their will, and many fear that the District’s policy will force them to make a choice: either ‘walk back’ their constitutionally and statutorily protected rights to gender identity and gender expression, or face the risk of emotional, physical, and psychological harm,” the Attorney General’s office stated in a press release. “The board’s policy thus unlawfully discriminates against transgender and gender nonbinary students, subjecting them to disparate treatment and harassment, including mental, emotional, and even physical abuse.”
The lawsuit also discusses the board’s motivations to adopt such a policy, asserting that it was “to create and harbor animosity, discrimination, and prejudice” toward these students. Transcripts of the debate prior to voting on the policy show board members referring to trans and gender non-conforming students as “mentally ill,” “perverted,” and a “threat to the integrity of the nation and the family.”
“Attorney General Bonta has a substantial interest in protecting the legal rights, physical safety, and mental health of children in California schools, and in protecting them from trauma, harassment, bullying, and exposure to violence and threats of violence,” the press release continued. “Research shows that protecting a transgender student’s ability to make choices about how and when to inform others is critical to their wellbeing, as transgender students
are exposed to high levels of harassment and mistreatment at school and in their communities.”
Last week, Bonta issued statements regarding the three other school districts, who plan to implement copycat gender identity disclosure policies targeting trans and gender non-conforming students. Stay tuned.
To review a copy of the lawsuit, visit bit.ly/3P0365y
San Diego Pride to host another Youth Leadership Academy
San Diego Pride’s Youth Leadership Academy 2023 will take place Saturday, Nov. 11, from 9 am - 5 pm at San Diego City College, located at 1313 Park Blvd.
The annual academy, which is open to LGBTQ youth, young adults, parents, and those working with LGBTQ youth, is described by organizers as “a fun, inclusive and intense academy that includes historic context, LGBTQ resource education, organizing skills, panel discussions, and teambuilding activities that inform and motivate participants to be successful in all they do.”
Organizers state that the academy was created to bring LGBTQ youth from across the region together to educate, engage, and inspire the next generation of LGBTQ leaders. To learn more or register, visit bit. ly/3Pi9y9k ▼
I found it through giving myself a chance to just be me. If I’ve learned anything from my poor dating choices, it’s that people sometimes lack the courage to tell you the truth out loud – whether it’s the usual cliches of “We just want different things” to “I need to find myself, you deserve better.” Those sentences are not realistic in the world we live in, people need to be honest with others and themselves.
When hearts are on the line what do you find acceptable?
We don’t live in a world of absolutes, but one thing I’m certain of is that closure should be what you make it out to be, and not what someone else defines for you.
–Korie Houston is a local social justice advocate. Reach him at koriehouston@zoho.com. ▼
15 SEPTEMBER 2023 VOLUME 4 ISSUE 23 LGBTQSD.NEWS
(Photo by @kaplan.photography) LGBTQSD.news COMMUNITY VOICES
FROM PAGE 11 CLOSURE FROM PAGE 5 BRIEFS
Student conduct rules specify that all students must be celebate. Clayton said he was reminded he must abstain from sex, and he learned the rules were modified to include a ban on same-sex kisses and hugs.
Clayton’s mother was on the university’s board of directors and his father was a Nazarene pastor. Clayton is now an attorney. A curious coincidence with the number 31 is unintentionally humorous to some. In the “Star Trek” fictional universe, Section 31 is an underhanded, mysterious
rogue element of the United Federation of Planets, which uses questionable methods, including assassination, to keep the peace in the galaxy.
A Star Trek movie specifically about Section 31 is in the works after a proposed series,“Star Trek: Section 31,” was rejected, according to Wikipedia and numerous Star Trek websites.
Methods of the fictional Section 31 agents involved deception, kidnapping, sabotage, biological warfare, and “many fans felt Section 31 betrayed the value system created by Gene Roddenberry – the creator of Star Trek,” said Star Trek writer David Weddle, according to Wikipedia. There are long discussions online about Section 31 among Star Trek fans. Some fans hate it, but some like it. Section 31 plots have appeared in five different Star Trek series.
Actress Michelle Yeoh was named to star in the Section 31 movie, according to Paramount Pictures, after she won Best Actress in April for “Everything Everywhere All At Once.” Yeoh also portrayed two characters on “Star Trek: Discovery.”
“The Star Trek reference is apt,” said Dean Nelson, when told about the Section 31 comparison. “It’s all so unnecessary, rooted in fear of ‘the other.’ For Jesus, though,
there is no such thing as an ‘other.’ Funny how the hierarchy misses that.”
After same-sex marriage became the law of the land by the United States Supreme Court (Obergefell v. Hodges, June 26, 2015), PLNU ended all on-campus weddings in 2015, apparently so same-sex weddings could not be performed on campus.
In 2016, the university donated $50,000 to fight SB 1146, a measure which aimed to protect LGBTQ students at religious institutions.
The Church of the Nazarene started in 1908 when Bresee and other co-founders broke off from the Methodist denomination in the Wesleyan Holiness Movement with emphasis on the religious experience called sanctification.
There are 23,803 Nazarene churches worldwide today, with approximately 2.66 million members, according to the Church of the Nazarene, which operates numerous colleges and does missionary work.
The denomination is famously – or infamously – remembered for rules against dancing, drinking alcohol, card playing, attending movies, premarital sex, adultery, and any type of same-sex expression.
Some of these rules have since been relaxed, but drinking and unmarried sexual expression is still heavily discouraged. There used to be bans on women wearing pants, jewelry, and make-up.
Yetter said he believes the college has had “a long history of homophobia,” having experienced it himself when he attended the university in the 1970s.
