San Francisco Bay Times - January 10, 2019 by San Francisco Bay Times

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LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area

CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019) January 10–23, 2019 | http://sfbaytimes.com

Rainbow Wave ushers in new hope

Rainbow Wave ushers in new hope The Rainbow Wave and the Most Diverse U.S. Congress Ever

Tammy Baldwin

David Cicilline

Angie Craig

Sharice Davids

Katie Hill

History was made on January 3 as ten openly LGBTQ individuals were sworn into the U.S. Congress: two in the Senate and eight in the House. The prior record was established by the last Congress with seven such politicians serving. The new Congress also has the largest number of female members, with more than 100 women serving in the House led by Nancy Pelosi and 25 in the Senate. Additionally, the Congressional Black Caucus and the Hispanic Caucus recorded more members than ever before, as did Asian-Americans and Pacific Islanders.

look two openly LGBTQ Senators in the eyes and tell them their lives are not worth protecting. In the U.S. House, Speaker Pelosi will have eight LGBTQ Representatives to consult about how various healthcare or criminal justice reform policies uniquely affect our community. The relationships these LGBTQ lawmakers will build with their colleagues on Capitol Hill are transformative, and with an unprecedented number of women and people of color also joining the 116 th Congress, equality issues will finally receive the attention they deserve.”

Regarding the Rainbow Wave, LGBTQ Victory Institute President Annise Parker said: “An historic number of LGBTQ people will serve in the new U.S. Congress and their influence will shape the debate on equality legislation and issues moving forward.”

The 10 LGBTQ members of Congress—all Democrats—are the following:

She added, “In the U.S. Senate, those opposed to the Equality Act will now need to

Tammy Baldwin (Senate, WI)- Baldwin’s electoral success has made history several times. In 1998, she became the first woman elected to represent Wisconsin in Congress and was the first openly gay woman elected to Congress from any state. In 2012, Bald-

Sean Patrick Maloney

Chris Pappas

Mark Pocan

Kyrsten Sinema

Mark Takano

win became the first openly gay person elected to the Senate.

tive Americans on reservations and entering politics.

David Cicilline (House, RI-1)- Cicilline previously served as Mayor of Providence, Rhode Island (2003–2011). He was the first openly gay mayor of a U.S. state capital.

Katie Hill (House, CA-25)- At 31, Hill is one of the youngest women ever elected to Congress. She is also one of just a handful of national leaders who is openly bisexual.

Angie Craig (House, MN-2)- Craig, who with her wife Cheryl Greene has four children, was the first openly lesbian mother to be elected to Congress. She was also the first woman to be elected in Minnesota’s 2nd district, and was the first openly gay person elected to Congress from Minnesota. Sharice Davids (House, KS-3)- Davids is the first openly lesbian and LGBT member of Congress from Kansas. She is also one of the first Native American women elected to Congress. She began her career as a mixed martial arts professional before working with Na-

Sean Patrick Maloney (House, NY-18)- Maloney is the first openly gay person elected to Congress from New York. He was the second member of Congress to legally marry a samesex partner while in office. Chris Pappas (House, NH-1)- Pappas is the f irst openly gay person to represent New Hampshire in Congress. Mark Pocan (House, WI-1)- Pocan is notable for having been the only openly gay member of the state Assembly after Tammy Baldwin’s election to Congress, and was one of three (continued on page 6)

Women’s March 2019 Will Follow Release of New ‘Women’s Agenda’

“We are excited that this year there will be 208 Sister Marches across the U.S. in addition to the march in D.C.,” Women’s March spokesperson Cassady Fendlay told the San Francisco Bay Times. “As a young organization, we have been working hard to build our robust network of affiliated groups in alignment with our Unity Principles, which were creat-

ed in 2017 by a diverse group of women movement leaders.” (See the Unity Principles at https://bit.ly/2jEBXpr ) Fendlay continued, “Ahead of the 2019 march, we are in the process of creating the first intersectional feminist policy platform based on the Unity Principles, which will be called the Women’s Agenda. We look forward to debuting that around the date of the march.” “I’d also like to share that our youth-led group, Women’s March Youth Empower, has been doing some really impressive things over the past year or so,” she added. “In March 2018 they organized the #Enough Student Walkout to protest gun violence, which reached 2 million students nationwide, and they launched the Empower Coalition to encourage young people to vote in summer 2018 as well.”

Councilmember At Large Rebecca Kaplan Elected as Oakland’s First Out LGBT Council President In a unanimous vote, Councilmember at Large Rebecca Kaplan on Monday, January 7, was elected Oakland Council President. She is the first openly LGBT+ individual to hold this position in the city’s history. Kaplan, who is also a San Francisco Bay Times columnist, said in a statement: “I am honored to serve the people of Oakland as Council President. I thank my colleagues for their confidence in my leadership and for the opportunity to serve Oakland. We have many challenges. We must acknowledge injustice and prejudice exist and we need leaders to assure we work together to move our city forward. I believe in giving all Councilmembers the opportunity to affect change, and all council members will have an opportunity to chair a committee. I look forward to working together in coalition with community to advance Oakland’s vital needs.” 2

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Women’s March COO Rachel O’Leary Carmona, in turn, said in a statement: “Thousands of women are hard at work preparing for actions across the country, and we’re coming with an agenda.” “When women lead, we bring our communities w ith us,” Carmona added. “We’ve seen that women-led mass mobilizations have enormous impact. Incorporating specific policy demands into our direct-action strategy will ensure we take the power of our movement to the next level. The Women’s Agenda is a bold and unprecedented vision and roadmap for women’s rights that will ensure all our communities are represented in our fight for justice.” The dozens of organizations and movement leaders creating the new Women’s Agenda represent women of diverse faiths and ages, women of color, LGBTQ women, indigenous women, disabled women, sex workers rights advocates, low-income women and more.

PHOTO COURTESY OF BRITANY VOCK

The 2019 “Women’s Wave” event marking the 2nd anniversary mobilization of the Women’s March on Washington will take place on January 19. Efforts are ramping up for the national event in Washington and multiple Sister Marches across the country, including several in the Bay Area.

Committee members include policy experts and representatives from Planned Parenthood, Bend the Arc Jewish Action, the ACLU, the Indigenous Environmental Network, the National Latina Institute for Reproductive Health, Council on American-Islamic Relations, UndocuBlack, American Federation of Teachers, Astraea Lesbian Foundation for Justice, Pueblo Action Alliance, Black Women’s Roundtable, Girls for (continued on page 21)

Two California Politicians Who Have Made LGBT History Are Sworn into Office On Monday, January 7, former State Senator Ricardo Lara (D-Bell Gardens) was sworn into office as California Insurance Commissioner, while former Lieutenant Governor Gavin Newsom was sworn in as Governor of California. Both men have achieved historic firsts for the LGBTQ community. Lara is the first openly LGBTQ+ statewide elected official in California history. Prior to this achievement, he was the first openly gay person of color elected to the California State Senate (2016). “I am grateful for the support of California voters who deserve a strong consumer advocate,” Lara said in statement after his latest election win. “Helping communities recover from wildfires while preparing for the threat of climate change will be my first job as Insurance Commissioner. As communities are rocked by devastating wildfires, Californians need a healthy, honest insurance market that allows them to quickly rebuild their lives and protects against future disasters.” Newsom, in turn, gained national attention in 2004 when, as Mayor of San Francisco, he directed the city’s county clerk to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples, which was then in violation of state law. A memorable moment was when he presided over the wedding of lesbian activists Phyllis Lyon (1924–) and Del Martin (1921– 2008), who had been together since 1952.

Dear Friends,

ers of the San Francisco Bay Times for a gloIt is a pleasure to send best wishes to all the read rious New Year filled with peace, hope and love! years of the Bay Times! This year, we are thrilled to celebrate 41 incredible ge, inform, entertain and Ever y day, our city is blessed by your work to enga . inspire the LGBTQ community in San Francisco to me than “RepresenI often say that there is no job title that means more you in Congress in the spirtative.” Thank you for the honor of representing song is our anthem—“Make it of our city’s patron saint, Saint Francis, whose me a channel of thy peace.” Floor of the House in 1987 In that spirit, I delivered my first remarks on the that was tearing our city to call for leadership in fight ing the AIDS crisis when being sworn in as the and the LGBTQ community apart. Last week, n on behalf of the LGBTQ Speaker of the House, I once again called for actio ity in the 116th Congress community by mak ing the Equality Act a top prior s once and for all. to end discr imination against LGBTQ American ry of Stonewall, we celeThis year, as we prepare to mark the 50th anniversa n has achieved in the fight brate the remarkable achievements that our natio hate crimes legislation and for equality—from passing historic, fully inclusive into the dustbin of histoy sending the hateful “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” polic s. Democrats are commitry to ensuring marr iage equality for all American ss and deliver progress for ted to bold, ambitious action to build on this succe they love. Working togethall Americans, regardless of who they are or whom House, and dismantle the discr imination er, we will fight the hateful policies of this White that undermines our democracy. values,” I always tell them: “Listen careWhen people criticize me for my “San Francisco you’ll be saying it too.” Our march tofully to what we’re saying, because soon enough, not be deterred. Together, let us march ward justice and equality may be long, but it will rs our American ideals of fairness, equaltoward a better, more inclusive future that hono ity and justice. for the privilege of serving as your RepThank you, once again, for your friendship and resentative. 2019. Happy New Year and best wishes for a successful PHOTO BY PHIL NGUYEN

A Letter to San Francisco Bay Times readers from Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi

Speaker Nancy Pelosi on the floor of the House of Representatives for the Swearing in Ceremony on January 3, 2019

House leadership of the 116th Congress

2019: The Year of the Equality Act

There’s a lot riding on this newly formed House of Pelosi, such as finally passing the Equality Act. During her gavel acceptance speech, House Speaker Pelosi said, “We will make America fairer by passing the Equality Act to end discrimination against the LGBTQ community.”

Andrea Shorter It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day, and I’m feelin’ ... hopeful. What’s so great about 2019 so far? For one, it means that 2016 is that much farther behind us, and we’re that much closer to 2020. What’s so great about 2020? The possibility of inaugurating a newly elected Democratic President to usher out the door the current occupant at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. To that end, 2019 is off to a decent start. Nancy Pelosi’s reclamation as the 63rd Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives—Thank the Lord!—to preside over record numbers of women, people of color and openly LGBT people as new and returning members of this 116th Congress is poised to restore some semblance of “balance in the force” as a constitutionally equal branch of government to a woefully beleaguered, reckless and off kilter Executive branch.

Legally sanctioned discrimination remains the state of affairs for LGBT Americans in 2019. There are too many Americans, including some LGBT people, who are under the i mpression t hat because we won the right to same sex civil marriage as the law of the land in each of the 50 states, all forms of discrimination against LGBT people are illegal. As a sobering reminder, while you can now get married on Sunday in all 50 states, on Monday you can be f ired for who Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi and Senator Chuck Schumer, flanked by activists and members of and how you love Congress, spoke at a press conference held on Capitol Hill, May 2, 2017, held to introduce a bill in 31 states. providing LGBT community members with comprehensive federal protections. The Equality Act AARON BERNSTEIN/ZIMBIO.COM

Cross Currents

The Equality Act would amend the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the Fair Housing Act to ban discrimination against LGBT people in employment, housing, public accommodations, jury service, education, federal programs and credit. The Act would also push back against religious liberty claims used to discriminate against LGBT people.

A few years ago, I had the honor of working with Rep. David Cicilline of Rhode Island, now senior ranking out LGBT member of the House, to organize a community listening session about the Equality Act in San Francisco. Joined by the Honorable Roberta Achtenberg, former San Francisco City and County Supervisor and Assistant Secretary of HUD, and former Senior Advisor to the Mayor on Transgender Initiatives, Theresa Sparks, our panel presented an overview of the proposed bill to help achieve federal protection of LGBT persons against discrimination.

AARON BERNSTEIN/ZIMBIO.COM

The first obvious order of business for the 116th Congress is to relieve us of the Trump shutdown of the federal government. No $5 Billion for the Trump Wall, but, still, pronto.

In the spirit of scoring some bipartisan winwins, perhaps the Equality Act might stand a better chance even in the most divisive government since the Civil War. However it plays out on the 2019–2020 battlefield, the Equality Act should get more sunshine this time around. At the very least, support for the passage of the Equality Act should be part of the platforms of all Democrat Presidential Candidates, without exception. It is unimaginable for any serious contender in the 2020 Presidential race not to openly, proudly and boldly support LGBT full equality. It is equally unimaginable for LGBT people to demand anything less of any candidate or future President—whomever she might be. Andrea Shorter is a Commissioner and the former President of the historic San Francisco Commission on the Status of Women. She is a longtime advocate for criminal and juvenile justice reform, voter rights and marriage equality. A Co-founder of the Bayard Rustin LGBT Coalition, she was a 2009 David Bohnett LGBT Leadership Fellow at the Harvard Kennedy School of Government.

would secure basic rights for LGBT people throughout the U.S.

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JANUARY 10, 2019

California Democratic Party Assembly Delegate Elections The Obscure Democratic Party Election This Weekend

The January Election You’ve Probably Never Heard Of

https://bit.ly/2C7bQl6

Democrats in California likely don’t know much about the role that the CDP plays in our electoral process, and the influence it carries. Yet, this month, Democrats throughout California have an opportunity to shape its future through a mostly unheard-of election called the Assembly District Election Meeting or “ADEM.”

You must be a registered Democrat in order to vote. If you are a Republican, head over to the CAGOP website, sell your soul to the devil and go to their convention. If you are registered as “decline to state,” then you are dead to me. Stop pretending you’re a rugged individualist, make a commitment and pick a party.

Well-Behaved Women Seldom Make History Louise “Lou” Fischer Have you ever wondered who sponsors the “California Democratic Party” mailers, ads and literature in every election? Were you so energized by the recent midterms that you want to participate in another election? Are you a registered Democrat? If so, then come to the California Democratic Party (CADEM) Assembly Delegate elections this weekend! In San Francisco, if your Assemblymember is David Chiu, you are eligible to vote in Assembly District (AD) 17. If Phil Ting is your Assembly Rep, you are in AD 19. If you have no idea, you can look it up online ( https://bit.ly/1bK1fqu ). If you are outside of San Francisco, you can still join in the fun! Find your polling location at:

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The California Democratic Party includes every registered Democrat in the state; 8,557,427 as of October 2018. Every year, CADEM holds a convention to decide its platform and to endorse candidates. Since California has yet to build a convention center that can hold 8.5 million people, delegates are chosen to represent all Democrats in the state. All delegates are entitled to attend the State Democratic Convention and to represent their district by party-hopping to find the best free food and drinks while filling up on Dem party swag. There are also committee meetings, caucuses, speeches and then more speeches. It’s like Coachella for political nerds. Three Ways to Become a Delegate Option 1: As an elected member of the County Central Committee (DCCC). The DCCC in most counties is populated by grassroot activists and community leaders who are committed to increasing Democratic voter registration and civic participation. In San Francisco, DCCC elections are the equivalent of The Hunger Games between 2 groups representing different shades of blue with each side claiming the other is “out of touch with the voters,” but I digress. All members that were elected in the 2016 election are delegates. In addition, the Chair has a certain number of appointment slots for DCCC members who were appointed after (continued on page 6)

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To the Left, To the Left Peter Gallotta Democrats rule the roost in California. There are few other states in the union that arguably bleed as blue as California does today. Almost every state elected officer from Governor to Secretary of State to Treasurer is a Democrat. In the California state legislature, Democrats recently won a supermajority in both the State Senate and the Assembly. Even remaining Republican strongholds like Orange County flipped blue during the midterm elections in November. Today, of California’s 53-member Congressional delegation, a whopping seven are Republicans. The California Democratic Party (CDP) has become one of the most inf luential and well-oiled Party machines in the country and plays a formidable role in ensuring ongoing blue victories up and down the state. Most

The CDP is made up of roughly 3,000 delegates who get to decide on which candidates get endorsed, what the Party stands for, and how it governs itself. Of these 3,000 delegates, roughly 2,000 are either Democratic elected officials or appointed by elected officials and Party leadership—often making them beholden to the political beliefs of their appointing officer. The remaining 1,000 delegates are elected at the ADEM elections, which are held every two years in January in every Assembly District in the state (there are 80). These are the delegates beholden to you. This year’s ADEM election will take place either on the weekend of January 12–13 or 26–27, depending on the Assembly District. On that day, registered Democrats in that District will be eligible to vote to elect seven female-identified and seven non-femaleidentified delegates, along with one delegate to represent the District on the Party’s Executive Board. But don’t confuse this kind of event with your typical Election Day. There are no polling locations in your neighborhood and you can’t get your ballot mailed to you. Voting is strictly limited to two hours on a weekend morning, and you must vote in person (there’s no online option). It’s no surprise then that the ADEM elections have long been considered something that only Party insiders participated in. And where’s the democracy in that? (continued on page 20)

6/26 and Beyond Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis Nicole Kopaunik and Daniela Paier of southern Austria sure knew how to kick off the new year right when they became the first same-sex couple ever to marry in that country, tying the knot just minutes after the clock struck midnight on the 1st. As of 2019, the hills are alive with marriage equality in Austria, making it the 16th nation in Europe and 26th in the world with the freedom to marry. We look to 2019 to bring marriage equality or significant progress toward that goal to additional countries throughout the world. Just over the border in the Czech Republic, activists hope their country will soon become the first former Soviet-bloc country to gain marriage equality. The Czech Republic has provided same-sex couples registered partnerships with substantial rights since 2006, and public opinion polling consistently shows substantial support for marriage equality. Last year, 46 members of the Czech Parliament from a range of political parties introduced marriage equality legislation supported by the govern-

ment, and Parliament had scheduled debate on the marriage equality legislation for October 31. The debate was postponed, however, with a vote possible early this year. If the bill passes Parliament, the more conservative Czech Senate must approve it and Czech President Milos Zerman, who has not publicly taken a position, must sign it.

... Why are we allowing marriage between criminals, between a felon, murderer (but not same-sex couples)? ... Why is the state still sleeping and not facing this reality that nowadays, there are individuals who would like to be happy like the gay people, lesbians, the transwoman, transmen? Why is the state so indifferent to the happiness of these people?”

LGBTIQ leader Czeslaw Walek told Human Rights Watch last summer: “The path is long and curvy, but we are hopeful” with the possibility “we will celebrate marriage equality in the Czech Republic during the Pride March of August 2019.”

And Justice Marvic Leonen asked: “Why do we interpret our laws and our constitution that we impose something on the freedoms and happiness of others, without showing a very viable reason except tradition? ... Are we free to choose a portion in the past and make it tradition and exclude the other portions of the past?”

On the other side of the world, Taiwan in May 2019 will in all likelihood become the f irst country in Asia with the freedom to marry by virtue of a 2017 Constitutional Court decision that provided two years for implementation. As we reported extensively in the December 6, 2018, edition of the San Francisco Bay Times, anti-LGBTIQ referenda passed late last year create uncertainty and possible challenges for achieving immediate, full marriage equality in Taiwan. Marriages will begin in May, though, and the breakthrough may have a huge impact throughout the rest of Asia. The Philippines could beat Taiwan to the punch if its Supreme Court rules in favor of the freedom to marry in a potentially landmark case that is now fully briefed and argued. During the June 2018 oral argument, Justice Samuel Martires pointedly questioned the government’s attorney: “Why do we have to discriminate against same-sex marriage? ... Are not gay couple(s), lesbians capable of loving like the heterosexuals?

We do not know how representative these questions are of the views of the majority of the currently 14-member Philippine Supreme Court. Controversial Philippine President Rodrigo Duterte at times has even expressed support for marriage equality. If the Court rules in favor of equality, same-sex couples could possibly be able to marry in the Philippines later this year. In Japan, LGBTIQ couples are also taking to the courts, with ten couples from different parts of the country announcing that on Valentine’s Day, they will jointly file a lawsuit for the right to marry under the “fundamental human rights” and equality guarantees of the Japanese Constitution. Lawsuits asserting same-sex partners’ inheritance and immigration rights are already pending. The prog ressive Const itut ional Democratic Party of Japan (CDP), the opposition party in the Diet ( Ja-

pan’s national legislature), will also introduce marriage equality legislation early this year. Unfortunately, Pr ime M inister Shinzō Abe and the governing conservative Liberal Democratic Party (LDP) will oppose both the lawsuit and the legislation, creating obstacles to immediate success. LGBTIQ leaders, however, are using the upcoming 2020 Tokyo Olympics and the As reported in Oberösterreichische Nachrichten (OÖN) pubfact that five of the G-7 lished in Linz, Austria, Nicole Kopaunik and Daniela Paier were married in Velden, Austria, on January 1. countries have marriage equality and Italy has daughter of Communist Party head same-sex partnerships—but Japan and former President Raul Castro, has neither—to pressure for change had sought. now. In Bermuda, the government of that And in Thailand, the current mili- British territory late last year filed tary government announced its sup- with the Privy Council in London port late last year for civil partner- its final possible appeal attempting ship legislation that would provide to roll back marriage equality in same-sex couples substantial rights, the territory. If the Council choosbut not full marriage equality. With es to take the case and rules in favor elections for the lower house of the of equality, the decision could have Thai Parliament anticipated in 2019, precedential effect not just in Bera vote and further action on the leg- muda, but also in other British terislation may likely take place after ritories. the election. If successful, partnership recognition could come to Thai- Stay tuned—and engaged—for what we hope is an historic year for marland this year as well. riage equality progress worldwide In the Americas, we await Costa Rica very likely becoming the first John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, toCentral American country with gether for over three decades, were marriage equality in 2020 when a plaintiffs in the California case 2018 court decision takes effect. In for equal marriage rights decided Cuba, a vote will be held this year on by the California Supreme Court a new constitution that leaves open in 2008. Their leadership in the the possibility of marriage equality grassroots organization Marriage in the future, but does not include Equality USA contributed in 2015 the explicit guarantee that LGBTIQ to making same-sex marriage legal activists, including Mariela Castro, nationwide.

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JANUARY 10, 2019

PHOTO BY KLEINE ZEITUNG

2019: An Historic Year for Marriage Equality Worldwide?

Dementia Care Infrastructure

Aging in Community Dr. Marcy Adelman One of the good news stories of 2018 was the quiet passage into law of an initiative that will significantly improve infrastructure access, care and support for Alzheimer’s patients and caregivers. The Building Our Largest Dementia Infrastructure for Alzheimer’s Act (BOLD Act) was an ambitious initiative forwarded by the Alzheimer’s Association and co-sponsored by a group of congressional leaders including Sen. Susan Collins (R-ME), Catherine Cortez Masto (D-CA), Shelley Moore Capito (R-WV), Tim Kaine (D-VA) and Maxine Waters (D-CA). Bipartisan support for the BOLD Act, and its rapid movement from introduction into law in just one year, illustrate the widespread concern over this issue and the energy to do something about it.

The goals of the BOLD Act are to reduce general population risk for cognitive decline and impairment, reduce health disparities, prevent avoidable hospitalization and improve access to caregiver support. The BOLD Act authorizes The Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) to establish Alzheimer’s Centers of Excellence to increase education that expands and promotes evidence-based, culturally competent interventions to improve dementia outcomes. The BOLD Act also provides funding to promote cognitive health and risk reduction, increase early detection and diagnosis, and increase support for caregivers.

greater risk of dementia in medically underserved communities.

In addition to significantly expanding the national Alzheimer’s public health infrastructure, this stunning legislative win will also greatly expand efforts to reduce health disparities by encouraging and funding nonprofits to report more racially and ethnically diverse data. There is currently little Alzheimer’s research on older people of color or LGBTQ older adults, although both are at higher risk for Alzheimer’s and related dementias.

The BOLD Act is a bold step forward in creating a culturally competent infrastructure to respond to the needs of all Americans challenged with dementia. It could not have come a moment too soon.

Nationally, African Americans and Latinos over the age of 65 are more than twice as likely to develop Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia. Minority stress and high rates of chronic illness are understood to contribute to

However, very little is known about the risk of Alzheimer’s and related dementias among LGBTQ older adults. It has been well documented that LGBTQ older adults experience many health disparities that may put them at greater risk for Alzheimer’s and related dementias. For example, LGBTQ older adults report high rates of chronic diseases such as asthma and cardiovascular disease, high levels of lifelong stress, and high rates of obesity, smoking and alcohol consumption. These are all known risk factors for Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia.

Dr. Marcy Adelman, Co-founder of the nonprofit Openhouse, oversees the Aging in Community column. She is a psychologist and LGBTQI longevity advocate and policy advisor. She serves on the California Commission on Aging, the Board of the Alzheimer’s Association of Northern California and Northern Nevada and the San Francisco Dignity Fund Oversight and Advisory Committee.

Alegre Home Care is proud to support Dr. Marcy Adelman’s Aging in Community column in the San Francisco Bay Times.

FISCHER (continued from page 4) the 2016 election or for anyone else he chooses to appoint. Option 2: Get appointed by a federal or state elected official. Every elected official and even Democratic party officers have a certain number of appointments. You can get an appointment one of 2 ways: sit and wait for the phone to ring or be a mensch, volunteer your time, participate in political activities and get noticed by a state or federal elected official. Option 3: Run for delegate at the ADEM elections this weekend. Each Assembly district elects seven men and seven women, for a total of 28 in San Francisco. These elections used to be tiny little gatherings populated by members of Democratic clubs and political junkies. I personally ran the check-in desk for the 2010 election and about 100 people showed up, voters were in and out in 15 minutes, winners were announced and we all ate cake and drank juice together. The past few elections have been much more competitive with the aforementioned 2 groups (shades of blue) setting up their own slates of candidates and duking it out like the

Greeks and Trojans in 12th Century B.C.; the only thing missing was an actual Trojan horse full of voters (which would certainly provide excitement to an otherwise mundane event). The election for Assembly District 17 is this Saturday, January 12, from 10 am to 1 pm at The Women’s Building, 3543 18th Street, San Francisco. Assemblyman David Chiu is running a slate entitled “United Resistance” that could just as well be called “United Colors of Benetton” as it represents a diverse coalition of activists and advocates for the environment, immigrants, housing, transit, parents, students, artists and labor unions. The other is the “progressive Reform Slate.” I support the United Resistance Slate, but you should make your own decision based on the merits of the candidates. You can read all of the stump speeches on the CADEM website ( https://bit.ly/2rUmXJu ). Click on: “View a list of all eligible candidates.” There are 34 people running, so every vote counts. In Assembly District 19, the election is Sunday, January 13, from 10 am to 1 pm at Doelger Café, 101 Lake Merced Blvd., Daly City. This election

RAINBOW WAVE (continued from page 2) LGBT members of the 100th Wisconsin Legislature. The other two were Tim Carpenter and JoCasta Zamarripa of Milwaukee. Kyrsten Sinema (Senate, AZ)- Sinema was the first openly bisexual member of the House of Representatives, the first openly bisexual person elected to the Senate and the first woman elected as a Senator from Arizona. She is also reported to be the only non-theist member of Congress. She was recently sworn into office using a copy of the U.S. Constitution, and not the Bible, as has been the usual practice. Mark Takano (House CA-41)- Takano was the first openly gay person of Asian descent in Congress. We congratulate the members of this historic new Rainbow Wave, and hope that they and LGBTQ allies in Congress will help to turn the U.S. political tide toward social justice, equality and opportunity for all. 6

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will be more subdued. Phil Ting put together a consensus slate that is entitled “UniTing,” get it? “United” and “Ting.” Other than the lame attempt at a cute name, it’s a good group of people. There are 21 people running. Read through the candidates’ statements and make your own decisions. If you want to have a voice, you need to vote! Doors open at 10 am for both locations. Voting begins at 11 am and goes until 1 pm. Anyone standing in line at 1 pm will be allowed to vote. It would be a good idea to show up early. Louise (Lou) Fischer is the Immediate Past Co-Chair of the Board of Directors for the Alice B. Toklas LGBT Democratic Club and has served as an appointed and elected Delegate for the State Democratic Party. She is a proud graduate of the Emerge California Women’s Democratic Leadership program, was a San Francisco Commissioner and has served in leadership positions in multiple nonprofit and communitybased organizations.

Sunday’s A Drag Miracle on Powell Street

Photos by JP Lor

The cast of Sunday’s a Drag Miracle on Powell Street—Donna Sachet, Holotta Tymes, Saki Samora and Mahlae Balenciaga—performed their final show for the year on Sunday, December 30, at The Starlight Room. This Room with a view is located 21 floors up, atop the Sir Francis Drake Hotel. The show, now in its 14th year, launched for the new year on Sunday, January 6. Each event begins with a delicious bountiful brunch at 10:30 am followed by the show at 11:30 am. The performance features elaborately costumed, talented drag queens and transgender entertainers.

New Year’s Eve: Countdown to 2019

Photos by Rink

LGBT community members and friends enjoyed some hearty reveling on Monday evening, December 31, to ring in the new year. On Polk Street, for example, the popular Cinch Bar drew a large crowd for the celebration. Parties were also held on Castro Street, such as at the historic Twin Peaks. The annual Royal Baby Contest benefit was held at the Edge bar. Viewers at home enjoyed the San Francisco Bay Times Castro Street Cam. Its four cams monitored the festive activity throughout the evening on the 24/7 live-streaming windows: http://sfbaytimes.com/castro-street-cam/

San Francisco Bay Times Castro Street Cam recorded the view from Cliff ’s Variety live on December 31, 2018, ringing in the New Year 2019.

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Donna’s Chronicles

“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.”

By Donna Sachet

e can think of no better way to start the new year than with friends over lovingly prepared food honoring long-held traditions. We attended two such gatherings on New Year’s Day. One of San Francisco’s most accomplished hosts, John Newmeyer, welcomed over 100 guests into his lovely Victorian home once again, featuring all of the dishes associated with good fortune in the coming year, eg. greens, ham, black-eyed peas, cornbread, etc. One of the most diverse crowds in recent memory took the chance to catch up on the past year and to share plans for 2019. Regular readers of our columns will know that we hesitate to report too many details of private parties, but perhaps this smattering of guest names will give you some idea of the scene: Joel Goodrich, Jeff Cotter, Matt Buchanan, David Zisser, Greg Wick, Doug Waggener and Matt Fadness. Next, we happily joined the party in progress at Bevan Dufty’s home, also offering mounds of delicious food and oodles of fun guests, including Sister Roma, Michael Youens, Steve Kawa, Benito Juarez, Tom Temprano and Supervisor Rafael Mandelman. Maybe the conversation leaned slightly more towards politics here, but the spirit of community was equally present. With the crystal-clear skies and warm weather of the first day of 2019, it is not hard to envision a wonderful year ahead! Friday night, we joined Empresses China Silk and Misty Blue, Emperor J.P. Soto and a bevy of Imperial Court friends for a lively bus tour celebrating the upcoming five and fifteen-year anniversaries of their reigns. Ever-present throughout the night was the memory of the late and beloved Emperor Fernando Robles. From Lookout, The Cinch, El Rio and Pilsner Inn to The Edge, this group was out for fun! In addition to our hosts, bus passengers included Ron Huberman, Walter Vandernald, Chris Ochoa, Keith & Gladys Bumps, Nic Hunter and, of course, the Reigning Emperor Leandro Gonzales and Reigning Empress Pollo del Mar.

–Arthur Ashe

Calendar a/la Sachet Every Sunday Sunday’s a Drag! 10:30 am Brunch, 11:30 am Show The Starlight Room Sir Francis Drake Hotel $75 inclusive https://bit.ly/2OB4Gur

Speaking of the Reigning Emperor and Empress, things are heating up for this year’s campaign for Emperor and Empress with public voting scheduled for Saturday, January 16, throughout the City. Many do not realize that the Imperial Court of San Francisco is over 50 years old and each year offers the possibility of serving as Emperor and Empress of the City to anyone who meets some basic requirements and is up to the task. This Saturday, January 12, is the deadline for submitting applications, available online ( http://www.imperialcouncilsf.org/ ). Rumors have been running rampant all over the City; be at Twin Peaks from 2–4 pm this Saturday to see who steps up to run for these legendary titles!

Sunday, January 13 Imperial Winter Beaux-Arts Ball Benefiting Aguilas and Trans Lifeline 5 pm–10 pm Folsom Street Foundry 1425 Folsom $30–$60 https://imperialcouncilsf.org

Imperial Coronation LIV, Under the Sea, is Saturday, January 23, when this group is at their finest, crowning new Monarchs, distributing thousands of dollars raised during the year to worthy recipients and generally living up to their regal reputation! We’ll congratulate the Reigning Emperor and Empress on a job well-done. Already, the City’s fabric stores report a run on aqua chiffon and sea green taffeta; so, plan your outfits now! A complete list of associated events during the preceding weeks will appear at the end of this column starting with the next issue.

Sunday, January 13 Roast of Peaches Christ With Coco Peru, Cassandra Peterson, Jinkx Monsoon and Mink Stole 8 pm–10 pm Castro Theatre $30–$75 https://bit.ly/2Fhnayg

Saturday morning, we arose early to honor Sam Thoron at a memorial at the First Unitarian Universalist Society of San Francisco. (It is at this event that we obtained the quote that appears with this issue’s column.) Sam & Julia Thoron will forever be associated with PFLAG, the organization created by parents, family and friends of LBGT individuals to offer loving support where there is often misunderstanding, disappointment and even rejection. When their daughter shared with them that she was Lesbian, these parents’ quiet mainstream life was upended, but they faced the news with compassion, eventually joining the work of PFLAG and serving as its national leader for several years. We consider ourselves fortunate to have known him and extend our deepest sympathy to his wife Julia and the entire family. His son Ben Thoron and niece Amira Thoron spoke personally and beautifully at the service, as did Roger Doughty of Horizons Foundation. In attendance were Kate Kendell, Al Baum, Mark Leno, Marcy Adelman, Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis and many others touched by this generous soul.

Friday, January 18 Winter Onesie Party Benefiting Global Girls Alliance 9 pm Lookout $5 suggested donation https://bit.ly/2VBt4Qr

And finally, Krewe de Kinque continued their dedication to all things Mardi Gras with a celebration of Twelfth Night last Saturday with Cajun cooking, colorful décor, and private traditions created and honored by its membership. Among the guests at this private home were Don Ho, Mark Paladini, Deana Dawn, Sister Dana van Iquity, Frank Vera, Tony Leo, Kippy Marks, Kitty Tapata & Lori Howes, Aja Monet-Ashton and Barry Miles. Gary Virginia created this charitable organization in 2004 with a group of friends who shared his love of New Orleans and the swirl of activities surrounding Mardi Gras. Each year a new King and Queen of the group is announced and the calendar fills up quickly with fundraisers for worthy causes including HIV/ AIDS, breast cancer, emergency relief for natural disasters, and civil rights concerns. This year’s King XV Garaje Gooch and Queen XV Miss Chief will host Bal Masque XVI at the Café on Saturday, March 2, raising money for the LGBT Asylum Project while staying true to the New Orleans slogan, “Let the good times roll!” In closing, it is easy to slide into a ref lective, even depressed, mood after so many events in December and a more limited January schedule, especially with cold and wet weather. All the more important to check in with those in your life who might need a little extra care. Could you send a getwell card? Could you offer to walk a dog for someone? Could you share some soup or cookies with a friend you haven’t seen in a while? Consider this a great opportunity to spend time with people you care about. We’ll all benefit in the end. Donna Sachet is a celebrated performer, fundraiser, activist and philanthropist who has dedicated over two decades to the LGBTQ Community in San Francisco. Contact her at empsachet@gmail.com

PHOTO BY SHAWN NORTHCUTT

Donna Sachet performing at the Holiday Season edition of Sunday’s a Drag atop the Sir Francis Drake Hotel near Union Square.

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JANUARY 10, 2019

Weddings, Occasions & Relationships Discover the Capacity to Love

Lonely No More Scott Tsui While vacationing in Mexico, I met a married gay couple from Texas, Jack and Richard. They’d been together for 32 years. Their relationship began when they started working together. They were instantly attracted and Jack asked Richard out. The rest is history. I also met Stephen and Will, both single. Stephen had recently broken up with his boyfriend. He’d given up on love since he’s been unable to hold a relationship for more than six months. Will, previously married to a woman, often hooks up with other closeted divorced/married men. He fantasizes about transforming a hookup into a partnership. Recently he realized that he doesn’t know what he wants anymore. Why have two found the love of their life while the others struggle to do so? What do Jack and Richard possess that Stephen and Will don’t? To determine the answer, we must first ask: what capacity do we need in order to give, find and receive love? Psychoanalyst John Bowlby’s (1907– 1990) Theory of Attachment provides

a better understanding of how people connect and why some are unable to initiate and sustain an intimate connection with a partner. It’s the emotional bond that connects one person to another through time and interaction. Bowlby discovered that the relationship between an infant and their primary caregiver(s) through the early years has a profound impact on how the child connects with a partner as an adult. The impact and significance those formative years can have in our adult life—most of which we’re unaware of—is immense. Typically, when we’re brought up with the warmth and attention necessary to feel safe and secure—or conversely to feel neglected and abandoned, and to experience verbal, physical or sexual abuse—the experiences shape our capacity and ability to connect with others. A personality type known as Naturals is an exception. Even with a traumatic upbringing, Naturals tend to show more resilience and exhibit tenacity to overcome obstacles. Oprah Winfrey is a great example. Otherwise, we often develop into one of four main attachment styles: 1. Secure Securely attached people tend to know that there’s someone out there who loves them. It’s easy for them to relate and to feel comfortable in their relationship, trusting one another and being emotionally connected. If relationships fail, they’re able to move on without too much upset. They tend to be honest, independent and supportive. They frequently develop deep, intimate bonds.

2. Dismissive Avoidant They’re usually seen as cold and aloof, building an invisible barrier of protection around themselves. Highly independent, they detach easily from others and are seemingly content without close relationships. They keep their distance, often walking away from arguments and confrontation, yet some may also use unfriendly behavior as a tool to keep others away. They’re not looking for people to depend on them and vice versa. They deal with rejection by avoiding individuals and suppressing their feelings, keeping their inner selves hidden. 3. Anxious-Preoccupied These individuals are desperate for affection and love. They’re in constant need of attention from their partner who must be totally emotionally entangled with them. They’re needy and doubt their own self-worth, lacking confidence and exhibiting emotional hunger by being demanding and showing jealousy. They’re easily upset and difficult to please, and can be emotionally draining. 4. Fearful Avoidant Losses, trauma and/or various abuses in childhood and adolescence can lead to fearful, avoidant attachment. Some may have negative views towards themselves and feel uncomfortable with emotional closeness, tending to avoid their feelings for fear of being hurt when drawn into a romantic relationship. They may desire intimacy, yet shy away from it when people get too close. (continued on page 20)

This Month at the Castro Farmers’ Market Winter at Your Farmers’ Market By Debra Morris Isn’t it great to live in California where year-round farmers’ markets are still bringing you fabulous fruits and vegetables? Root vegetables, Brussels sprouts, kiwiFENNEL AND OR ANGE fruit, winter lettuce, spinach, kale, onions and more are still available. But citrus is the star this One medium bulb of fennel month with an abundance of oranges, grapeTwo Cara Cara oranges fruit, tangerines, lemons and pomelos.

SALAD

e medium pickled red onion At the Divisadero Farmers’ Market on SunOn e medium bulb fennel days, 10 am to 2 pm year-round at Grove and 1/4 Divisadero Street, check out Inzana Ranch cup chopped (roasted, salted) pistachios out of Hughson with a wide array of citrus. 1 lemon They offer Oro Blanco, Marsh and Ruby Red Salt and pepper, to taste grapefruit, Nagami and orange kumquats, 1/2 cup champagne vinegar Mayer and Lisbon lemons, Kaffir and Palesdri zzle of olive oil tine limes, and our favorite mandarin oranges in Clementine, Honey and Satsuma varieties. They also have a wide array of oranges Remove fronds from fennel so tha t no spears protrude like Cara Cara, Valencia, Blood and Navel, from the root. Cut off the base and then slice down each with amazing f lavor and color. Counthe center of the root to expose the heart. Much like try Rhodes Family Farm from Visalia has big a cabbage heart, the fennel heart tastes great, but I juicy pomelos. These farmers bring only what recommend removing it for this salad. You can remove they grow so you know you’re getting the best. it and slice Citrus is wonderful right now, but be sure to support other market purveyors who bring only the best flowers, honey, baked goods and gourmet hot foods to you fresh each week. Thank you for supporting your local farmers’ markets! Debra Morris is a spokesperson for the Pacific Coast Farmers’ Market Association (PCFMA). Check out the PCFMA website for recipes, information about farmers’ markets throughout the region and for much more: https://www.pcfma.org/ 10

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it thinly to include in the salad, but keeping it attached will bind all of the fennel to the center, making the pieces too large to eat . After removing the heart, slice the bulb (and the heart, if you like) thinly. Toss with lem on juice and salt and set aside. Peel and segment the Cara Car a oranges. Toss orange and fennel together with pickled onion and salt . Add a splash of orange juice and circle your mixing bowl with olive oil. Toss from the outside in to best incorporate the oil. Finish with pistachios on top!

Recipe: Marisa Ades, Cookin’ the

Market chef.

The Cure for Your Holiday Spending Hangover can work for everyone from window washers to C-level executives to children. In fact, it’s something you might recognize from your childhood. So, what is this brilliant solution? An allowance. Don’t laugh. It honestly works—as lots and lots of my clients can vouch for, including those aforementioned executives making gobs of money. Here’s how to make it work for you:

Money Matters Brandon Miller It’s okay. Most of us overindulged during the holidays. We ate too much. Spent too much. Did whatever too much. But that’s what January is for. Making resolutions to do better. Not surprisingly, top resolutions every year are to lose weight, stick to a budget (which means you have to make one first), start exercising and put more money away for your retirement/rainy day/ mid-life crisis. And every year around this time, you’ll find lots of advice for how to stick to your resolution(s). Suggestions often include being specif ic about your goals, setting a timeline, enlisting help from friends and family, and not letting setbacks deter you from your ultimate goal. All are good advice, except that most of these tips take a lot of willpower. You have to keep making a decision to act in your long-term interests instead of indulging in a short-term pleasure. No wonder we all fail! Sadly, I don’t have a magic formula for the dieting or exercising routine. But I do have an easier way for you to stick to a budget and save money at the same time. It’s something that

Figure out how much money you really need to run your household each month. This is the amount of your allowance. Then have your paycheck and any money that comes in from other sources automatically deposited into a savings or brokerage account. Let’s call this your savings bucket. Every month, have your allowance automatically deducted from your savings bucket and put into a checking or other account where you can pay your expenses for that month. The rest of your income is saved automatically. You can pay annual or big expenses, such as insurance and quarterly or property taxes, from your savings bucket. Keeping your allowance constant means that anything extra is automatically saved. As the year goes on, your paycheck may go up because you’ve paid your full share of Social Security taxes and/or maxed out your retirement account contributions. So, this amount is saved, not wasted. And if you get a bonus or raise, that goes into savings, too. Contrast that with the usual way people handle their expenses. When there’s a little extra in your paycheck, it’s human nature to increase your spending. But with an allowance, that amount goes into your savings bucket before you even see it. More importantly, you have to make an effort to deduct it if you want to spend it.

That really is the beauty of an allowance. Instead of having to consciously move money from your “spend” account to your savings, you just sit back and let everything happen automatically. And let’s be honest. It’s way easier to do nothing than something. If you’re part of a couple or throuple that shares expenses, an allowance strategy can work particularly well for you. It forces you to talk about money and to get on the same page about how much to save and how much to spend each month. It can also get rid of the power dynamics that sometimes happen when one partner makes significantly more than the other(s). An allowance is a great equalizer, becoming everyone’s money, not just one person’s. And you can tailor it as needed for your personal situation. For example, a couple bringing in $14,000 a month with a $10,000 allowance could put $8,000 into a joint account and $1,000 each into an account for both individuals. By sticking to an allowance, you’re also preparing for retirement when your income will be fixed, or for a time when your income may drop due to maternity/paternity leave, taking a sabbatical, losing a job or becoming disabled. Who knew that the $5 you got every week as a kid for cleaning your room and taking out the trash could help you retire more comfortably? If you give yourself an allowance now, maybe next January, gaining control over your money won’t have to top your resolution list. Brandon Miller, CFP® is a financial consultant at Brio Financial Group in San Francisco, specializing in helping LGBT individuals and families plan and achieve their financial goals.

Two Coupes Offering Unique Experiences This week’s Lexus RC 350 F Sport and LC 500 are the fruits of those labors, and both are true performance cars on many levels. Speed is easy— the new Camry V6 storms around with 301 horsepower—and coupe buyers want the whole experience, from cornering tenacity to interior richness to brazen sexiness.

Auto Philip Ruth Expensive cars must be luxurious. That’s a long-standing American value: Buicks, Cadillacs, Lincolns and Chryslers kept the assembly lines running with velour, vinyl and fake wood. A premium car being something more than an ornate parade float first took root in the U.S. with MercedesBenz and BMW in the 1970s. Today, a high-performance model is a signal that, besides producing mainstream coddlers, the brand has what it takes to run with the big dogs. Toyota’s Lexus brand followed that path. It spent much time filling the nation’s gated communities with cushy beige sedans. Then, realizing that BMW was offering chunky Black Forest cake while it had settled on warm flan, Lexus axed its SC 430 coupe—droopy-eyed and floridly contoured, it was an elfin Eldorado—and the brand charted an edgier coupe path.

That’s a lot for one car to do, and the test cars’ prices reflect that. For 2019, prices start just over $50,000 for the RC 350 F Sport, and the LC 500 slots in close to double that at $92,200. Sedans can be bought unconsciously, but coupes thrive on provocation, and so outfitting one for yourself can feel like a truly personal experience.

Lexus RC 350 F Sport

So what experiences do the LC 500 and RC 350 F Sport provide? And does the former give double of the latter, as their prices might indicate?

Lexus LC 500

The answers: both these coupes come across as something special, and the more expensive one justifies its price by coming across as a bona fide exotic. In fact, driving the LC 500 was like walking George Clooney through the Castro, as everyone wanted a closer look. Construction workers stopped and shot photos, and tourists posed next to it. And many questions came, which reinforced to this introvert that this striking car was tailor-made for the talkative among us, because conversations started pretty much whenever I opened the LC 500’s door. The RC wasn’t as engaging to others, but it still got lots of looks. All RCs have smoother detailing in 2019, and

toning down the vents and grilles of the ‘18 tester makes the RC appear less aggressive, which you may or may not like. But all RCs share the classic long hood/short trunk profile that’s as far from a minivan as one can get. As for the driving, think silky for the LC 500 and brawny for the RC 350 F Sport. Their personalities are distinct enough that, if price weren’t an issue, then you’d walk into a Lexus dealer and drive two cutting-edge coupes to select the one that suits you. That’s a long way from the beige sedans that got Lexus up on its feet. Philip Ruth is a Castro-based automotive photojournalist and consultant ( www.gaycarguy.com ). Check out his automotive staging service at www.carstaging.com

S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

JANUARY 10, 2019

IMES TThrowback AYPhoto BRink S

LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Are) a CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019

Round About - All Over Town - Wishing Photos by Rink

1984

ew Year’s Day marked the 86th birthday of LGBT activist and former ambassador James Hormel, shown here with yet another civil rights activist, Terry Bean (left), and actress Valerie Harper. The three were among those who attended the 1984 Democratic Party Convention in San Francisco. This particular event was an LGBT-sponsored party for Paul Tsongas (1941–1997).

Black Brothers Esteem’s David Williams and George Chandler welcomed guests arriving at Strut for the DREAAM Project’s party on December 21.

Black Brothers Esteem’s Traye Turner, SF AIDS Foundation’s Tony Bradford and DREAAM Project’s Jovan Bright served dessert at the DREAAM Project’s Ugly Sweater Party held at Strut on December 21. The DREAAM Project supports African American men.

Tsongas, who served as both a U.S. Senator and as a member of the House of Representatives, hailed from Massachusetts. During his political work, he expanded a number of National Park System areas, fought for HIV/AIDS research, supported various other LGBT causes and more. He had previously served in the Peace Corps in both Ethiopia and the West Indies. Tsongas died of complications from pneumonia and non-Hodgkin lymphoma at age 55. Bean, a pioneer of the LGBT rights movement, co-founded the Human Rights Campaign, the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund and other national LGBT rights organizations. He remains a vital activist, most recently spearheading a successful campaign to rename a prominent street in Portland, Oregon, after Harvey Milk. Bean did key fundraising for former President Bill Clinton, and was the first LGBT member of former President Barack Obama’s National Finance Committee.

Civil rights activist Julie Dorf and filmmaker J married, stopped by Cliff’s Variety for the lan Wrap benefit.

A holiday window at the Russian Hill Upholstry & Decor store on Polk Street

Empress Patty McGroin and Paju Munro v gift wrapping table during Cliff Variety’s an benefit on December 22.

Event coordinator Adrian Williams with Clint Sockwell and Malik Seneferu next to the Kwanzaa ceremonial table at the 13th Annual Celebration at City Hall on December 26

San Francisco resident Hormel is the grandson of Hormel Foods founder George Hormel. He funded the namesake James C. Hormel Gay & Lesbian Center at the San Francisco Public Library in 1995. Like Bean, he was also a co-founder of the Human Rights Campaign and remains an active supporter of our community.

Board members Matthew Denckla and Mark Kelleher with artist Ash (right) at the opening reception of Jessalyn Ragus’ exhibit currently on display at Strut.

Anne Weitner, Saki Shimizu and Miss Chi wapping table at the annual Gift Wrap ben Cliff’s Variety.

He shares the New Year’s Day birthday with longtime San Francisco Bay Times columnist Sister Dana van Iquity. We wish both many more birthdays to come! To learn more about Hormel, visit his website: http://jameschormel.com/ Customers waiting in line observed the staff preparing crabs at the annual Christmas Eve lunch at the famous Swan’s Oyster Depot on Polk Street.

Photographer Dot Schmidt and his husband Brett Waxdeck at the opening reception for Jessalyn Ragus’ art show at Strut.

Illustrator and painter Jessalyn Ragus with ist Ash and Monish Lal at the opening of R art show at Strut.

Artist Jessalyn Ragus with sisters Gaia Lo and Kay Thulu at the opening reception of art show at Strut Illustrator and painter Jessalyn Ragus (second from left) with her mother Cynthia Ragus and friends Chantal Jolagh and Matthew Servers Alex Lau and Gary Keener offered wines and other beverages at the opening reception of Jessalyn Ragus’ show at Strut on January 4.

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BAY TIMES S

g You a Happy New Year

LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area

CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

CASTRO STREETCAM presented by

Hot Cookie’s server Theo Malliaras offered holiday sugar cookies and other goodies on display at the shop on Castro Street.

Coma Te (formerly Empress Khmera Rouge) and San Francisco Bay Times contributor Kit Tapata, co-host, volunteered at the annual Gift Wrap benefit at Cliff’s Variety supporting the Imperial Court.

http://sfbaytimes.com/

Jenni Olson, who are ndmark store’s Gift

Gift consultant Piper Lind welcomed customers at Cliff’s Variety on December 22.

items of the week

Dressed for the season at the Edge bar on December 22.

Aarke Water Carbonation

volunteered at the nnual Gift Wrap

Aarke is the world’s first sparkling water maker designed with a complete stainless steel enclosure. Forget the plasticky soda makers of the past. This machine will look beautiful for years to come on your kitchen counter.

Sister in Training Goldilox and Sister Nova Aggra were on Market Street on January 4 on their way to the monthly anti-violence vigil held at Harvey Milk Plaza.

ief staffed the gift nefit hosted by

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Artist Natasha Jong displayed her work at the Spark Arts Gallery during the January Castro Art Walk.

Nest Protect Smoke and CO2 Detector January is a good time to test your smoke alarms. If it’s time to upgrade or replace, the Nest Protect is a sweet choice. Not only does it give you a heads up in a pleasant voice when you burn the toast, it can also be joined with other Nest alarms to let you know what room has the issue. Not at home?... No problem. The Nest Protect can be monitored and controlled from your phone.

A sign announcing the work of artist Tracy Piper on display at Art Attack SF Gallery during the Castro Art Walk on January 3

appy New Year from all of us at Cliff’s. The beginning of the year means our amazing buyers are taking off for trade shows to find the newest and greatest things for 2019. All of these new fun things should start rolling into the store in early February. We can’t wait to share with you some of our new treasures.

Members of the band Trash Elf performed at Spark Arts Gallery during the January Castro Art Walk on January 3.

Artist Tracy Piper with a display of her work at the Art Attack SF Gallery during the January Castro Art Walk.

As Heard on the Street . . . What’s your New Year’s resolution for 2019?

compiled by Rink

ove f her

Miss Shuguna

Nick Leonard

Rexy Amaral

Morningstar Vancil

Mark Abramson

“To improve my health in many categories - physical, financial, and self-care.”

“Unfortunately I am single this year, so I don’t have anyone to point out the faults I need to fix.”

“Do more! Believe!”

“Recycle and learn how to recycle more.”

“To write my next memoir, ‘River Days, River Nights,’ about the Russian River from 1975–85”

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JANUARY 10, 2019

Finite Disappointment, Infinite Hope to cultivate hope for the new year. But first a little about how psychology understands hope.

Roland Schembari and Bill Hartman, Co-Founders Randy Alfred, Founding News Editor 1978

Since Freud, virtually all psychological theories have assumed that the causes of our emotional problems lie in the past—in our traumas, conditioning and family conflicts. But has that focus been misplaced?

Kim Corsaro Publisher 1981-2011

2261 Market Street, No. 309 San Francisco CA 94114 Phone: 415-601-2113 525 Bellevue Avenue Oakland CA 94610 E-mail: editor@sfbaytimes.com www.sfbaytimes.com The Bay Times was the first newspaper in California, and among the first in the world, to be jointly and equally produced by lesbians and gay men. We honor our history and the paper’s ability to build and strengthen unity in our community.

Examined Life Tom Moon, MFT Last time I described a process for letting go of unproductive thoughts and habits in 2019. This time I want to discuss why it is also especially important

The Bay Times is proud to be the only newspaper for the LGBT community in San Francisco that is 100% owned and operated by LGBT individuals. Dr. Betty L. Sullivan Jennifer L. Viegas Co-Publishers & Co-Editors

Beth Greene Michael Delgado Abby Zimberg Design & Production

Kate Laws Business Manager Blake Dillon Calendar Editor

Kit Kennedy Poet-In-Residence J.H. Herren Technology Director Carla Ramos Web Coordinator Mario Ordonez Juan Ordonez Distribution

CONTRIBUTORS Writers Rink, Sister Dana Van Iquity, Ann Rostow, Patrick Carney, Kate Kendell, Alex Randolph, Heidi Beeler, Gary M. Kramer, Dennis McMillan, Tom Moon, Tim Seelig, Cinder Ernst, John Chen Rafael Mandelman, Jewelle Gomez, Phil Ting, Rebecca Kaplan, Kin Folkz, Leslie Katz, Philip Ruth, Peter Gallotta, Bill Lipsky, Karen Williams, Donna Sachet, Gary Virginia, Zoe Dunning, Marcy Adelman, Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis Brandon Miller, Jamie Leno Zimron Michele Karlsberg Lyndsey Schlax, Randy Coleman, Debra Walker, Howard Steiermann, Andrea Shorter, Scott Tsui, Tom Temprano, Lou Fischer, Frankie Bashan, Karin Jaffie, Brett Andrews, Karen E. Bardsley Photographers Rink, Phyllis Costa, Jane Higgins Paul Margolis, Chloe Jackman, Bill Wilson, Jo-Lynn Otto, Sandy Morris, Abby Zimberg, Morgan Shidler, JP Lor ADVERTISING Display Advertising Standard Rate Cards http://sfbaytimes.com/ or 415-503-1375 Custom ad sizes are available. Ads are reviewed by the publishers. National Advertising: Contact Bay Times / San Francisco. Represented by Rivendell Media: 908-232-2021 Circulation is verified by an independent agency Reprints by permission only. CALENDAR Submit events for consideration by e-mail to: calendar@sfbaytimes.com © 2019 Bay Times Media Company Co-owned by Betty L. Sullivan & Jennifer L. Viegas

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Recent research highlights the importance for our well-being of something called “prospection,” which refers to the uniquely human capacity to predict what the future may hold, including all of the possible disasters that might befall us. Prospection theory proposes that we develop depression or anxiety, not because we ruminate about the past, but because we have bleak expectations for the future. According to this theory, peo-

ple become depressed when they believe that nothing can get better for them in the future; and they become anxious when they view the future as full of danger. That’s why the ability to hope is important for everyone’s well-being. Most positive emotions arise when we feel safe and satisfied. But hope is unique in that we experience it most intensely when circumstances are most dire. Without the ability to hope, our thoughts about everything that might go wrong would overwhelm us and leave us completely immobilized. Yet our hope burns brightest in those moments when it most seems that all is lost.

one of the darkest periods in American history. A minority—but a large minority—have become ensnared in a destructive populist/authoritarian movement that is rooted in fear, hatred, greed and indifference to factual reality. I suppose the slogan of the Trump cult, “Make America Great Again,” was intended to inspire hope for a better future in his followers, and they seem to hear it that way. But those words refer to a counterfeit hope. They represent a backward-looking nostalgia for an idealized (and white) past that never actually existed in the first place.

This means that hope is a psychological asset and a coping strategy, not denial or wishful thinking. Wishing is a passive response that doesn’t motivate us to do anything. Hope instead is grounded in reality. It assesses current circumstances with a view to finding ways to improve them. It expands our perspective, strengthens our persistence and guards against despair. It isn’t just a feeling; it also involves thinking and acting, which means that hope is, at least to some degree, something to which we can deliberately commit.

Those of us who aren’t caught up in the trance of Trumpism may not need slogans to represent our hopes for the country. But for anyone who might want one, I think you could hardly do better this year than “Make America Kind Again,” where the meaning of ‘kind’ can also be understood to include words like just, generous, compassionate and civil. Understood in that way, this slogan expresses an indispensable hope for our time: that, collectively, the better angels of our nature will ultimately prove more powerful in determining the country’s future than our fear and ugliness.

One of the great examples of the power of this commitment was Martin Luther King, Jr., who was a leader for the ages in the struggle against racism, in part, because his commitment to hope was so unwavering. He understood that daring to hope for a better world helps to bring it into being, and he counseled, “We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”

Moreover, to identify with that slogan as a personal commitment is to challenge ourselves to live our individual lives from what is best in us. It may be that the most powerful example of hope we can offer each other in these times is to do all that we can to ensure that what is kind and gentle in us becomes our North Star. May we all be guided by infinite hope in 2019.

As 2019 begins, the example of his hope is an important lesson for all of us. As a country, we are currently in what will surely be remembered as

Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. For more information, please visit his website http://tommoon.net/

GLBT Fortnight in Review By Ann Rostow New Year, New Dilemmas Here’s some bad news to start the year. For the first time since Trump spontaneously banned transgender men and women from the military, a federal appellate court has ruled against us. The litigation has grown complicated, in part because we have no less than four federal lawsuits challenging Trump’s decision. Lower courts in all cases issued injunctions against the ban, which Trump has challenged. Here, the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia reversed a lower court, although the other three injunctions will remain intact for the moment and we’ve got to assume that they will survive their appellate court showdowns. Meanwhile, while these cases remain at an early stage, Trump has already asked the Supreme Court to jump in and consider the merits of the transgender ban, an unusual request for a legal issue that has yet to be resolved by the appellate courts. The justices will consider the administration’s petition at their January 11 conference, although there’s no reason to think that they will take immediate action. Trump has refined his anti-trans policy since his initial tweet. The military has determined that it will no longer accept recruits with gender dysphoria, which the administration claims is an official disability that justifies rejection. As for transgender recruits who don’t have a formal diagnosis, they are allowed to serve if they don’t transition. In other words, transmen may serve as women and transwomen may serve as men. The D.C. circuit did not publish an opinion, but it seems as if these “compromises” are enough to cover the government’s rear end in their view. I don’t know what to tell you. Other Supreme Court petitions with LGBT implications lurk on the schedule, and our only hope is that John Roberts looks to his place in history or that Brett Kavanaugh has a soft spot for gay civil rights that has remained hidden for decades. We celebrated too soon in June of 2015, and we watched with complacent confidence as the 2016 election drew near, dreaming about whom Hillary Clinton would pick to replace Scalia. And then came the nightmare. On a Happier Note That said, this is no time to give up. I was just reading a fairly long Washington Post article about the evolution of Colorado, from the hate state that passed Amendment 2 in 1992, to the 2018 electorate that just gave America its first openly gay governor, Jared Polis. Back in the early 1990s, conservative Christians who were just coming into their own saw Amendment 2 as a national blueprint. The amendment, later struck by the Supreme Court as unconstitutional, preemptively barred state or local administrations from instituting gay rights policies. As the High Court ruled in Rome v Evans in 1996, the amendment made “a class of persons a stranger to its law” for no good reason. “We must conclude that Amendment 2 classifies homosexuals not to further a proper legislative end,” wrote Justice Kennedy, “but to make them unequal to everyone else. This Colorado cannot do.” Prior to that decision, the backlash against Colorado’s overreach led to boycotts by organizations, corporations and other cities, costing the state money and tourism. Six or seven other states started to put their own version into effect without success, and wealthy gay Coloradans like Tim Gill started pushing for change. This was

one of the early examples of corporations recognizing that diversity and respect for civil rights was an asset in business, and that the reverse could be costly. Years later, we watched businesses around the country react to North Carolina’s 2016 bathroom bill, forcing out a governor and, more importantly, dampening the enthusiasm for similar antics in other states. GLBT equality is now the default policy of corporate America and the majority sentiment in our society, manifested in part by the increasing number of gay couples on TV commercials. Have you noticed? How about the gay dads and the clueless babysitter? I just saw two brides in another one, and I didn’t even make a note of what it was. And whatever you think of comedian Kevin Hart, it’s significant that his antigay comments back in the day rendered him unfit to host the Oscars. These are measures of progress that can’t easily be overturned by court order or antigay politicians and they give me hope. Real or Not, It’s Election Season Again Meanwhile, since when is Joe Biden the best candidate to carry the Democratic torch into 2020? For God’s sake! He’s 76 years old. With all due respect, it’s time to retire the Medicare-eligible generation, or at least the 70-somethings. Elizabeth Warren will be 70 next June. Sanders is 77 and has a crotchety reputation. Mike Bloomberg is also in his mid-seventies, and like Sanders, hasn’t historically been a member of the Democratic Party. Sorry to repeat myself. I find the cable news discussions of the 2020 campaign ludicrous in general, with panels that wind up musing on who can win the South Carolina primary, or who can beat Trump in rural Ohio. And yet, Mel and I are junkies, so we can’t look away from the absurd spectacle of people pontificating about an election taking place nearly two years from now, featuring mystery candidates in the context of unknowable political and economic conditions. Bring it on. And by the way, I kind of like Elizabeth Warren again. Those Were the Days, My Friend Moving on, I was about to tell you about the effort to preserve LGBT history in West Australia, specifically the decision to restore and display an old toilet stall door with a glory hole, which is headed for a museum. This dubious artifact was rescued from oblivion by Neil Buckley, a Perth man who had happy recollections of the bad old days at the men’s room in the Gosnells train station. “I am sure this exhibit will bring back a lot of fond memories for many of the men who used beat culture as a way to meet other gay men to form a friendship, partnerships and a quickie,” Buckley told the press. “Sadly, this culture has now disappeared with the installation of automated toilet cubes and gay pick up apps like Grindr [and] Scruff. [But] Beats were an important part of gay social life and culture: they were a great place to meet, make friends, and have a great anonymous sexual experience.” Ah yes. Those were the glamorous times, partying with faceless closeted men in filthy public facilities, sticking your junk through a hole and hoping for a great anonymous reception on the other side. Too bad those hightech cubes and smart phone apps had to come along and spoil the sexcapades. I can just see the senior (continued on page 20) S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

JANUARY 10, 2019

Hip Pain: From Denial to Diagnosis

Take Me Home with You!

ance of denial and rehab that I had going on my left hip. Once the move was complete, I could barely move. I saw an orthopedist and got a diagnosis. My left hip was bone on bone. I wasn’t surprised. I knew the bone on bone situation was inevitable. I was always looking for another way to carry on, other than getting on the hip replacement trail. The time had come to go from denial to diagnosis.

Easy Fitness Cinder Ernst

Jules

“My name is Jules. I’m a stocky, muscular boy who enjoys a good workout! If your New Year’s resolution is to get more exercise, I’d love to go on some adventures with you. Running, walking, swimming and hiking are some of my favorite activities. After an active day, I love to take it easy and to snuggle up next to my favorite people!” Jules is presented to San Francisco Bay Times readers by Dr. Jennifer Scarlett, the SF SPCA’s Co-President. Our thanks also go to Krista Maloney for helping to get the word out about lovable pets like Jules. To meet Jules, as well as other pets seeking their forever homes, please visit: San Francisco SPCA Mission Campus 250 Florida Street San Francisco, CA 94103 415-522-3500

Dr. Jennifer Scarlett and Pup

Aside from major holidays, the adoption center is open Mon–Fri: 1–6 pm and Sat–Sun: 10 am–5 pm. Free parking is available for those wishing to adopt! For more information: https://www.sfspca.org/adoptions

I am sharing part of the journey that led to my hip replacement. I’ve been dealing with pretty yucky left hip pain and dysfunction for a number of years. Denial (of a more advanced condition) and lots of rehab helped me to stay strong, mobile and thinking, “I’ve got this.” Denial served me well, until it didn’t. The hip drama started with my right hip in the early 1990s, but the left hip has been the squeaky wheel in recent history. In July 2016 I happily moved from San Francisco to Napa. The move happened quite quickly. The physical stress of all that lifting and packing collapsed the delicate bal-

I say, “Don’t let a diagnosis ruin your day; it’s only someone else’s opinion.” Here’s why: Often when you diagnose something, denial collapses and you can get caught up in a negative momentum about your condition. Sometimes the diagnosis can be a relief, like justification for your suffering. I felt that way for a minute, saying to myself, “No wonder I couldn’t walk.” I knew, however, that my best outcome would be focusing my thoughts on what I wanted (a good feeling body), and not on what I was in the middle of (the absence of a good feeling body).

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After the diagnoses I follow directions, but I focus my thoughts in a different way. I separate the medical actions from my thoughts and feelings. How I think and how I speak about the diagnoses are all under my control. I learned this when I had cancer in 2015. It was a brutal diagnosis, and I was in surgery within a week. I only told two people to start. Once I realized that I was going to need more help, I told a few more people. I was very clear that I wanted to approach this diagnosis on my own terms. People are funny about cancer and I did not want anyone’s sympathy or worry on me. The rendezvous with cancer helped me to become better at controlling my focus and creating my experience.

Cancer made it easier for me to manage the run up to my hip replacement. The point of compartmentalizing the I believe it is important to separate medical aspect (including pain and yourself from medical information/ discomfort, when you can) is that I diagnoses. Here’s what I mean. I lis- can create my experience on purpose. ten to my doctor. I follow directions. I start each day with meditation, I learn what I can medically. Then which gives me a stable platform to approach my day. I choose my thoughts purposefully, preferring to be hopeful and optimisSF Sketch tic despite pain and discomfort. From there I can dart in to the Randy Coleman hails medical column and dart out to from New York, but stability as I need to. has lived in San Francisco since 1975. Coleman shares that before moving to the Bay Area, he studied Art History and Architecture at Boston University while working as a resident artist for architectural rendering at a Massachusetts historical society. “All of my life I’ve been an artist,” Coleman says. “To know me is to know that I have a passion for art and architecture. I love this project for the San Francisco Bay Times, and hope that you enjoy my sketches.” © Randy Coleman, 2019

I compartmentalize that medical aspect. I think of it as a column. The thought column lives in a narrow part of my thinking. For some reason, it’s always on the right side of my peripheral vision.

Having a predominantly neutral, satisfying or positive focus will help you to create an easier and more fruitful outcome from your diagnoses. As I entered pre-op for my hip replacement, I was relaxed and confident. As I write this, I am appreciating and bonding with my shiny new hip joint. Cinder Ernst, Medical Exercise Specialist and Life Coach Extraordinaire, helps reluctant exercisers get moving with safe, effective and fun programs. Her book, “Easy Fitness for the Reluctant Exerciser” ( http://cinderernst.com/ easy-fitness-book/ ), is available in paperback and E-book. She specializes in fitness and rehab for plus-size clients, but her stress-free approach is suitable for all. Find out more at http://cinderernst.com

BAY TIMES S

LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

Somos Tr3s Emphasizes Love Without Labels Marcelo Briem Stamm: I totally agree that labels are out in this century. You can define yourself or others as you feel or prefer. Then things may change. It is all about falling in love or even having a crush on people with whom you have a connection, regardless of labels. Right now, I would say I am gay.

Film Gary M. Kramer Somos tr3s/We Are Thr3e, now out on DVD, is out gay Argentine writer/director Marcelo Briem Stamm’s sweet drama about the relationship that develops between Ana (Flor Dragonetti), a divorced web designer, Nacho (Carlos Etchévers), a banker, and the bisexual Sebastián ( Juan Manuel Martino), a bartender who is attracted to them both. The trio meets at a party and enjoys a chaste night together. A week later, they spend the weekend at a country house that Sebastián’s friend owns where they discuss—then act on—having a threesome. How the characters navigate the challenges and pleasures of this polyamorous relationship forms the basis of this low-key film. In a recent interview with me for the San Francisco Bay Times, Stamm and Martino discussed their thoughts on labels, relationships and Somos tr3s. Gar y M. K ramer: The g uys in Somos tr3s are inclined to describe themselves as bisexual. However, it seems that labels are less important these days, so I’m curious about how you define your sexuality and what your thoughts are on labeling sexuality, vis-a-vis the film.

Juan Manuel Martino: I don’t believe in labels. For me, sexual identity—or relig ion, or race or social background—does not define a person. I have a connection with people regarding their human values and chemistry. I am straight. Gary M. Kramer: The film argues for a non-conventional relationship. What can you say about the dynamics of a threesome? Marcelo Briem Stamm: A threesome can be refreshing like a cocktail, even if you are single or in a relationship. In terms of the movie, we talk about all kinds of non-conventional relationships—the ones that work well between people who are truly in love, but don’t match with the society rules. This is the main point; Nacho, Ana and Sebastian feel connected, discarding labels, but their main problem is: Will their relationship, which is not standard among their social circle, survive? Juan Manuel Martino: Thinking specifically as Sebastian, a bisexual guy, the dynamic of this threesome works really well. The only concern is that one of the lovers does not feel the same as the other. If they all feel the same, and it is all equal—as in the film—then it is really good, because you will never get bored and you can explore many other things with your partners in the relationship.

Gary M. Kramer: Som os t r3s cer t a i n ly encourages threes o me s a n d s ho w s how some of the issues that challenge the lovers are handled. W hat do you think are the drawbacks of being in a relationship that can be tricky to maintain? Marcelo Briem Stamm: Nacho says, “A classic relationship between two people, it is just difficult; being three will be much more complicated.” But in terms of the dynamic of that particular relationship, they have the same drawbacks of any other. Of course, trust is super important, but it is important and essential for any kind of relationship. Juan Manuel Martino: This film presents a very interesting opinion about trust, because Nacho, Ana and Sebastian know that if one of them is away, it is possible that the other two may be together—and that will be fine, because there is a lot of trust. They are in an emotional relationship. And when they are all together, it is really special and unique. Gary M. Kramer: Marcelo, you frame the three lovers in different ways so no one character is always in the center of the frame/relationship. Did you want to deliberately “balance” things? Marcelo Briem Stamm: I was focused on a relationship that does not have that kind of drama. I watched lots of movies about threesomes and

always found that they were never really equal. I was like a guy who was into a girl, and then that girl was into the other guy and that guy was into the guy, and then, in some way, when they were together, there were lots of “negotiations.” I wanted to introduce a relationship without labels, where the characters fall in love equally and they have to decide if the relationship will work—or they will surrender to the norms of society. The key is at the end. Gary M. Kramer: There is only one sex scene in the film. This emphasizes not the sex but the love and emotions. Can you talk about that aspect of Somos tr3s? Marcelo Briem Stamm: I believe that every film has their own treatment, and that includes nudity or sex scenes. In Somos tr3s, the sex is pure love and freedom. This is a romantic film that talks about love without labels, and it did not need to be super explicit. I wanted to create a beautiful love scene that shows the intimacy of three lovers who are discov-

ering themselves and feel happy and complete. Gary M. K ramer: Juan, you seem to be very comfortable with your body and being naked on screen. Can you talk about this? Juan Manuel Martino: Yes, I am a confident person and an actor. And yes, Nacho and Ana fall in love with Sebastian, mainly because they discover his confidence and that he is so sure about what he wants. So, if you want to have a relationship that seems difficult, just go for it. It is all about confidence. © 2019 Gary M. Kramer Gary M. Kramer is the author of “Independent Queer Cinema: Reviews and Interviews,” and the co-editor of “Directory of World Cinema: Argentina.” Follow him on Twitter @ garymkramer

It’s All a Mystery to Me

Words Michele Karlsberg Michele K arlsberg: A nn Aptaker, author of Flesh and Gold, book four in the Cantor Gold Crime Series, is featured in this issue of the San Francisco Bay Times. I asked Ann what she would like to see more/less of in the mystery genre. I also asked whether her writing process is set up with an outline or is organic. I additionally asked: If you were forced to live the rest of your life as one of your characters, who would it be? And: What was the last book that you read and loved?

Ann Aptaker: There’s something for every taste in the general crime and mystery genre, but in the LGBTQI niche, particularly in Lesbian crime and mystery fiction, I’d like to see grittier stories, more moral conundrums, and less emphasis on “romantic mysteries” or “romantic thrillers.” Sure, my characters sometimes fall in love, but the Happily Ever After device, or the crime solver having a loving spouse, have never been intrinsic to the crime genre. Good crime fiction, especially the non-HEA noir variety, where right and wrong blur in a dark world of danger-filled lives— and yes, dangerous loves—is emotionally sexier. Much more interesting to write. My process is organic but with a dollop of outline, which actually comes later. I start with a character’s voice in my head. I write that voice. The story grows from there, and when it really starts to cook, the characters write the story themselves. They write it through the emotions that define them, pushing them to do what they must do, and say what they must say.

KIT’N KITTY’S

QUEER POP QUIZ

But since crime and mystery fiction must tie up loose ends and resolve plot points (so-called “literary” fiction can meander more freely; but don’t get me started on the definition of “literary” fiction and its sometimes-snobbish attitude toward genre fiction), somewhere along the line, usually about halfway or two-thirds through the manuscript, I jot down what’s happened thus far: which character has done what. This list or haphazard chart then gets lost among the other stuff on my desk, never to be seen again until post-book cleanup, but the act of making the list clarifies my thinking. Writing is living alternate lives in a made-up world. If I had to live the life of one of my characters, oh yeah, it would be Cantor Gold. Her outlaw life is much more courageous than mine—much freer, much sexier, much sweeter. Sure, she risks her life and her heart’s broken. But hey, she’s gotta pay the price for her defiant freedom. For me, writing grows from a love of reading. But picking one favorite re-

BONDING TIME English model Caroline “Tula” Cossey was in a James Bond film, For Your Eyes Only, and also was the first trans woman to appear nude in which of the following magazines:

A) B) C) D)

cently read book is i mpossible. I n stea d , her e a re my t h ree most i n f luential and re-read b o ok s: E m i l y Brönte’s Wuthering Heights, F. Scott Fit zgerald’s The Great Gatsby and James M. Cain’s Double Indemnity. Three very different book s with three very different voices, but related at their emotional core. To me, they are stories of desperate or thwarted aspiration. Heathcliff and Gatsby break my heart. Cain’s Walter is doomed by his own moral failure. And Cain’s mastery of language? I can but aspire. He ended Double Indemnity with just two words. Two perfect words. By the way, even though I write crime of the darker variety, I can’t watch horror movies. They terrify me!

Hustler Cosmopolitan Playboy Penthouse

ANSWER ON PAGE 20

Lambda Literary and Goldie Award winner Ann Aptaker’s favor ite themes are dangerous women and the history of her beloved City of New York. In addition to writing crime fiction, Ann teaches art and art history at the New York Institute of Technology. For more information: http://www.annaptaker.com/ Michele Karlsberg Marketing and Management specializes in publicity for the LGBTQI community. This year, Karlsberg celebrates 31 years of successful book campaigns.

Karin Jaffie, aka Kit/Kitty Tapata, won the title of Mr. Gay San Francisco in 2011 and has earned many other honors since. Connect with Jaffie via Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/pg/ktapata

S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

JANUARY 10, 2019

Sister Dana sez, “So it’s only just over a week after the year changed, and you have already broken your New Year’s resolutions. Why not be a little easier on yourselves and take my handy dandy ‘New Year’s Resolution Solution’?! Follow your Sister Dana and repeat: ‹I hereby resolve to be the best me I can be.’ It’s unbreakable! And once again, please say along with me: ‘This year bettah be bettah!’” I was blessed to have been able to enjoy the sacredness of everyone and the light within each of us at the QUEER CHRISTMAS EVE INTERFAITH SERVICE IN THE CASTRO. Gathered in Harvey Milk Plaza, we sang, we recited, we had hot chocolate and cookie communion, and gave hygiene kits to the those in need. This is a yearly event that should be enjoyed by everyone every year. “I am deeply honored and humbled to be named Chair of the Senate Housing Committee,” says Senator Scott Wiener. “I am extremely grateful to our President Pro Tem, Senator Toni Atkins, for the confidence she has placed in me. California is grappling with an unprecedented and severe housing shortage of 3.5 million homes. This shortage undermines our state’s economic, climate, and equity goals. Too many Californians are struggling with housing. Too many people are being evicted or otherwise displaced.” He added, “We have a solemn obligation to fight for California’s future by taking bold action to address our housing crisis. Much work lies ahead to make up for years of inaction, and that work needs to happen at both the local and state level.” Let’s hear it for “San Francisco Values”! WE ARE ONE was a glorious evening of fellowship, wine, cocktails, hors d’oeuvres and live entertainment around the grand piano with pianist Paul Hogarth as we raised funds for the communities that survived the Northern California fires. We joined hosts Empress Pollo De Mar and Emperor Leandro Gonzales, RAINBOW WORLD FUND founder Jeff Cotter, and John Newmeyer in his gorge home. Special guests were Absolute Empress LI Emma Peel, Breanna Elyce Sinclairé, Andrew Hirst, Bare Chest Calendar Mr. November 2019, and Mr. SF Eagle Manny Ojeda in a lovely Pacific Heights mansion. It is with tremendous delight that we SISTERS OF PERPETUAL INDULGENCE announce the recipients of our fall SATURNALIA 2018 GRANTS RECIPIENTS. The Sisters tend to support under-funded, small organizations and projects providing direct services to under-served communities. The majority of these organizations and projects receive little, if any, government or mainstream funding and may be in the early stages of development. The recipients and their mission are as follows: United Streets Direct Care: Providing haircuts and direct care to unhoused neighbors in the Bay Area; ABO Comix Collective: Working to amplify the voices and raise 18

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For my New Year’s birthday celebration, I was delighted to be a greeter nun/selfie poser along with Sister Amor in our fanciest NYE habits during the NEW YEAR’S EVE GAIETY show at Davies Symphony Hall. This festive gay event featured the San Francisco Symphony accompanying proudly queer vocalists Jane Lynch, Cheyenne Jackson, opera star Breanna Sinclaire, drag performance artist Thorgy Thorg mugging it up while actually playing gorgeous violin and viola, glorious co-emcee Peaches Christ with handsome co-emcee and conductor Edwin Outwater, the very humorous, naughty Varla Jean Merman singing her disgust at finding “yellow snow,” HomoPhonics men culled from the SF Gay Men’s Chorus to give us lively a cappella and dance, Kylie Minono as a very large New Year’s baby, and seven other Sisters doing a NYE toast. For the finale, the entire cast along with us audience members did a faux countdown to a not-yet New Year’s Day. Later at the Edge bar in the Castro, they showed a video of Mariah Carey singing the Happy Birthday song, the deejay having announced it was Sister Dana’s birthday at the stroke of midnight, and everyone in the bar sang to me—along with Mariah on the big overhead screens. HBD2SisterD! The monthly CASTRO ART WALK sponsored by CASTRO MERCHANTS continued on Thursday evening, January 3, from

PHOTO BY RINK

By Sister Dana Van Iquity

money for imprisoned LGBTQ+ people through various artistic mediums; The Gubbio Project: Building community through Sacred Sleep, where homeless guests are provided with a safe, clean, beautiful place to sleep on the pews of otherwise empty churches, Monday through Friday; Red Light Legal: Providing sex worker-led legal services and advocacy education to those most marginalized and vulnerable to violence in the sex industries; Rainbow Street: Working with local activists to provide shelter, food, clothing, health care, and psychological support to vulnerable queer, trans, and GNC people in the Middle East and North Africa; GLBT National Help Center: Supporting the LGBT and questioning community through peer support hotlines, online chat, resources, and more; Queer Rebels Production: A Queer and Trans People of Color intergenerational performing arts organization, producing a yearly 2 day performance festival as part of the NQAF; East Oakland Burrito Roll: Getting together once a month to prep, cook, and deliver burritos and water to those in need in the East Bay community; Humboldt Queer Dojo: California queer dojo raising funds for Judo mats and student loaner uniforms; Driveway Follies Marionette Magic: New, inclusive Halloween marionette theatre; The Visibility Project: Blending visual and performance arts, community archiving, and free artistic educational opportunities to lift up the stories and histories of LGBTQ Asian Pacific Americans; Ethical Slut Presents: Interactive classes for the Bay Area’s sex positive community, teaching consent and communication skills; In Lak’ech Dance Academy: Co-creating a community of queer and trans dancers to celebrate resilience, nurture collective strength, and heal from oppression; and Mattachine: A Serialized Story In Queer History: a podcast detailing U.S. LGBTQ liberation from 1920 to Stonewall.

PHOTO BY BILL WILSON

Sister Dana Sez: Words of Wisdumb from a Fun Nun

Oh, the many faces of Sister Dana aka Dennis McMillan. From schmoozing with Senator Feinstein at the HRC Gala to clowning with fellow Sisters, to assisting clergy at the Christmas Eve Interfaith Service at Harvey Milk Plaza, he is a fascinating and beloved personality. Sister Dana celebrates his birthday every year on January 1. “Happy Birthday!” to SD from all of us at the San Francisco Bay Times!

6 to 9 pm (and then continues every first Thursday evening, same times). https://www.castroartwalk.com/ Newz you can uze: MUNI Metro Underground Trains will again be replaced by Shuttle Buses later nights on most weekends in January. Late night weekend service at Castro and Church Metro Stations will be affected. The escalator at MUNI’s Church Street Station between outbound track-and-fare gates levels is closed for renovations until about March–April 2019. Meanwhile, use stairs or the elevator. I’ve been assured that the escalator’s popular Rainbow LED Lights will return when work’s done! FilmSF, the City office that coordinates permits and logistics for location filming, says that a major new feature film production from CBS Films will be in the Castro all day on Thursday, January 17, near Castro– 19th Streets, and again for three days on January 23–25 near Sanchez and 16th Streets. As an extra benefit for San Francisco, the film’s entire production will be based here in the City, bringing significant economic benefits. If you are based in the affected areas, but are not contacted by the producers at least a few days before the schedule, for more information contact manijeh.fata@sfgov.org or call her at 415-554-5142. Sister Dana sez, “Spoiled crybaby Trump would not sign onto Congress’s temporary budget plan unless it included his fascist/racist Wall—meaning the country was shut down with over 420,000 employees working without paychecks and 380,000 sent home. Appalling and reprehensible!” Sister Dana sez, “Not even Trump’s stupid Wall can keep you away from ‘migrating’ to these upcoming events!” (continued on page 20)

SISTER DANA (continued from page 18)

GALLOTTA (continued from page 4) Well, two years ago in the wake of Trump’s election and a fractured national Party, beleaguered Democrats throughout California saw an opportunity to change that. It was time for the Democratic Party base to take the reins and set an agenda to make the Party more accountable and representative of the needs and interests of us—the rank and file, and not just the established insider interests. Two years ago, I was one of hundreds of people throughout the state who threw my hat in the ring to run for delegate to the California Democratic Party. I ran as part of a slate of other “Reform Democrats” to represent Assembly District 17, the east side of San Francisco, with a clear agenda: get corporate money out of our party, fight for Medicare for All, and expand rent control throughout California. And with support from other San Francisco Democrats, I won. This year, I’m proud to be supporting a new crop of “Reform Democrats” who are running on a bold and progressive platform of change that includes free childcare and community college, public banks to fund the Green New Deal, strengthening unions and sanctuary for all refugees and immigrants. The 14 candidates I’m supporting are: Shanti Singh, Mia Satya, Kitty Fong, Jane Martin, Gloria Berry, Lorraine Bowser, Gloria Archule-

ta, Kevin Ortiz, Bahlam Vigil, Zhihan “Han” Zou, Brad Chapin, Otto Pippenger, Gabriel Markoff and former Supervisor John Avalos, who is running for the party’s Executive Board. They ref lect a broad coalition of groups including the Harvey Milk LGBTQ Democratic Club, the Latino Democratic Club, SEIU Local 1021, the Democratic Socialists of America, and the SF Berniecrats, and already have the endorsement of Supervisor Jane Kim, San Francisco Democratic Party Chair David Campos and former Assemblymember Tom Ammiano. If you are a registered Democrat and live in Assembly District 17, join me in voting for the “Reform Democrats for Labor & Equity” slate on January 12, 10 am–1 pm, at the Women’s Building on 3543 18th Street, just a few blocks from 16th and Mission BART. To find our more information about the slate members and progressive candidates running in other Assembly Districts, visit: https://www.adems.vote/ The truth is that the Democratic Party can and should be far more than an organization of insiders or a political machine that only endorses and fundraises for elected officials and candidates. It can be a vehicle for holding elected officials accountable on issues, for pushing a more progressive policy agenda and for

TSUI (continued from page 10) By learning the Attachment Style Theory, we know that our experiences from childhood can have a profound impact on how we connect with others in adulthood. Furthermore, we can trace the root cause of our distrust, avoidance, neediness and other abortive approaches to building intimate relationships. If feeling that human connection is a priority, it’s time to seek practical solutions. Whether through spiritual beliefs, self-help resolutions or professional help, the first step is to generate

building political power amongst grassroots activists throughout the state. That’s what makes it both democratic and powerful. The newly elected Democrats in the House and the return of San Francisco’s own Nancy Pelosi as Speaker of the House are a turning point for the Democratic Party nationally. Many of these newly elected members know that the Democratic base wants to see them deliver a progressive agenda for the American people. If we’ve learned anything from 2016 and the midterms in 2018 it is that when we show up and when we organize, we can win. For the sake of our democracy and our Democratic institutions like the CDP, we can’t rest on our laurels and hope for the best until 2020 comes around. Because as goes deep blue California, so can go the nation. Let’s keep organizing to win in 2019—starting with the ADEM. Peter Gallotta is a 30-something LGBT political activist holding on to the city that he loves thanks to rent control and two-for-one happy hour specials. He is a former President of the Harvey Milk LGBTQ Democratic Club and currently serves as an appointed member of the San Francisco Democratic County Central Committee and an elected delegate to the California Democratic Party.

compassion, empathy and love within ourselves to increase our capacity to give and receive love. Scott Tsui is the Relationship Results Coach, author of “Lonely No More – 8 Steps to Find Your Gay Husband” and the creator of the world’s first online gay relationship training: Gay Men Relationship Blueprint. Tsui works to help gay men find, attract and sustain meaningful relationships. For more information: http://scotttsui.com/

citizens wandering through the LGBT exhibits and pausing at the display. A wry smile plays on an older man’s face as he recalls the fun he had running from police and almost getting beaten up by those homophobic thugs. If those walls could talk! More importantly, I also learned about the happiest animal on earth, a small kangaroo-like creature that lives on an island about half an hour’s ferry ride from Perth. It’s called a quokka, and it earned its reputation with a smiling expression and lack of fear. Quokkas are so comfortable around humans that you can pet them and take selfies with them, a phenomenon that has led to a resurgence in tourism after great white shark attacks threatened to dampen enthusiasm for the West Australian coast. Unfamiliarity Breeds Contempt

KIT’N KITTY’S

QUEER POP QUIZ ANSWER (Question on pg 17) C) Playboy

Cossey appeared in top magazines, such as Australian Vogue and Harper’s Bazaar, and worked extensively as a glamour model. She was a Page Three Girl for the British tabloid The Sun and appeared nude in Playboy in 1991. The following year, she married David Finch, a Canadian. The couple now lives together near Atlanta, Georgia. SA N FRANCISCO BAY T I ME S

A ROYAL AFFAIR BENEFITTING REAF is January 12, 4–7 pm at Beaux, 2344 Market Street. REAF’s focus has always been, and continue to be, to support AIDS services until there is a cure. REAF has also expanded its focus to support

programs that provide food for the needy, programs that support homeless and disenfranchised youth. https://bit.ly/2M30sva THE IMPERIAL BEAUX-ARTS WINTER BALL will be held on January 13, 5–10 pm at the Folsom Street Foundry, 1425 Folsom Street. The 2019 ICP Ball will honor the historical tradition of the San Francisco Tavern Guild’s Beaux Arts Ball and the founding of the IMPERIAL COUNCIL in 1965. On this 54th anniversary, this will be a formal affair uniting all corners of the LGBTQ communities of San Francisco. Black Tie, Leather, Winter White, Crowns, Gowns, Vests and Sashes. The evening will be a charitable event benefiting TRANS LIFELINE and AGUILAS/EL AMBIENTE. https://bit.ly/2SI7HLB THE WOMEN’S MARCH is happening in SF on Saturday, January 19. This year’s theme is #TruthToPower and celebrating the #WomensWave. The rally is from 11 am–3 pm at Civic Center Plaza. Sister Dana sez, “There are 17 different investigations into Trump’s corruption. Hey, c’mon now, can’t we round that up to an even twenty?! Or forty?!!”

ROSTOW (continued from page 15)

They look adorable!

The very first art opening of 2019 at Strut on 470 Castro Street promises a great list of queer visual artists that are going to help celebrate the queer community, promote sexual health and bring us all stellar queer art! For the month of January, STRUT is exhibiting the work of Jessalyn Ann Ragus-Glasgow with TAROT EROTIQUE. Ragus is a Psychedelic Erotic Artist living in the Haight district of EssEff. Through her artwork she explores sexuality and eroticism and mixes it with the metaphysical, botanical, and religious/female iconography. Her work references womxn/queer issues and experiences, her own personal experience as a queer womxn, and life in the City. Using Psychedelic Erotica she hopes to eliminate the stigmatization around sex and sexuality by approaching eroticism in sweet, mind-altering and humorous ways that invite everyone to the party. This event showcases a selection of framed prints from her Tarot Erotique Deck. The deck includes 78 original collages born by combining queer imagery with the beauty of sex. https://www.strutsf.org

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In science news, a new study claims consuming alcohol and coffee can lead to a longer lifespan, a welcome conclusion for some of us who seamlessly move through the day from the latter to the former. I also read that there’s no particular benefit to getting up from the couch or working at a standing desk, more evidence that, like Trump, I instinctively know more about healthy living than the “experts” who have been trumpeting the unfounded theory that excess and indolence is bad for you. Trump goes even further, insisting that the human body has a limited energy supply, and that exercise diminishes the total amount over time. I’m not sure I can agree with this premise, but we do know that Trump had a smart uncle who taught at MIT, which provides him with a genetic predisposition to understand science and economics on a gut level. I saw another (2015) report in the Times, a graphic spread on the op-ed page about empathetic rats. Apparently, rats will forgo a chocolate treat to save another rat from drowning. The research-

ers then raised some rats in an allwhite group, and bred other rats in a mixed group of blacks and whites, only to find that the all-white group rats would not save a black rat, but the mixed rats would save rats of both colors. A white rat raised with all black rats would also save a black rat. I forget whether that rat would save a white one, but I don’t think that scenario came up. That was a simplification, but it explains why diverse parts of the country are sympathetic to welcoming immigration policies, while bastions of white communities far from any border are the ones who curl up into a little ball at the word “caravan.” It also explains why, as we came out of the closets by the hundreds of thousands at the end of the last century, American attitudes towards GLBTs evolved at a similar pace. While You Were Eating, Drinking and Making Merry What else is new, you might ask? Well, there was a nice story out of Barrington, Illinois, where a lesbian-headed family had its rainbow flag stolen off a pole in their backyard and replaced by the stars and stripes. The women posted about the incident on Nextdoor, and within a few days someone circulated dozens of little rainbow f lags and passed them around the Chicago suburb. Soon, there were rainbows sticking out of mailboxes and windows in a sweet display of solidarity. I think I’ve written about Nextdoor before, in general a useful portal for exchanging neighborhood news, but also a forum for alarmist individuals warning the rest of us about peteating coyotes, “suspicious” people walking down the street, cars that go slowly and therefore may be driven by criminals planning their next home invasions, or maybe even notifying our communities that freezing temperatures are expected overnight and we should all wrap up our pipes or keep our cats inside. Thank you, Miss Weatherman! One of my neighbors was recently terrorized by a stranger knocking at her door at 7 pm, describing the guy in detail and assuring us that she had called the police on the would-be intruder.

Others who encountered the same man informed us he was selling cable TV subscriptions. But still! It was after dark! Don’t get me started on the people who announce that they’ve “found” a cat, presumably someone’s indoor/ outdoor pet. Leave the cats alone, ladies! (It’s always a woman.) Then, we had an assistant principal at Liberty High in Clarksville, West Virginia, who followed a transgender student into the boys room, challenged him for not using a urinal, asked him if he noticed other boys checking him out, blocked him from the exit and told him, “You freak me out.” Woah, Nelly! The administrator was suspended with pay for a few days, but the student still has to deal with off icials who use his female name, and who technically won’t allow him in the boys room, even though it seems he uses it anyway. For all of the school stories that we read for good or ill, I suspect that most schools operate in a haphazard way, trying to avoid confrontation with formal rules that are trotted out for certain parents, but honored in the breach. Finally, a U.S. district court judge in Houston has tossed a religious freedom case against the organizers of “Drag Queen Story Time,” noting that the krazy kristians who brought the lawsuit have not been harmed by the nonprofit program, which features drag queens reading stories to kids at libraries and community centers. The judge also dismissed the notion that the Drag Queen group represented the “religion” of secular humanism, and that since Christians weren’t allow to use free public facilities at the Houston library, the drag queens should also be barred. The nutcase who tried to file this lawsuit says he’ll appeal to the Fifth Circuit, so stay tuned. arostow@aol.com

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WOMENS’ MARCH (continued from page 2) Gender Equity and dozens of other organizations from a wide range of backgrounds. The Women’s Agenda builds and expands upon the 2017 Unity Principles to provide clear and practical next steps for activists across the nation. It will identify urgent policy priorities determined by ten planning committees organized based on these Unity Principles: Ending Violence Against Women & Femmes, Ending State Violence, Reproductive Rights & Justice, Racial Justice, LGBTQIA+ Rights, Immigrant Rights, Economic Justice & Worker’s Rights, Civil Rights & Liberties, Disability Rights and Environmental Justice.

Each of the ten committees is comprised of a small team of issue-area experts who will identify one or two federal policy priorities they believe are most likely to address harm impacting vulnerable communities and are realistically achievable—to be acted upon, supported or even passed by 2020—with the support of grassroots activists. Women’s March will unveil the final agenda the week of the 2019 Women’s March. For more information about the Women’s March: Home Page: https://www.womensmarch.com/ New Video on Women’s March 2019: https://bit.ly/2VzPrWg

S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

JANUARY 10, 2019

BAY TIMES S

LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

COMING UP

The Nasty Woman Band will perform at the 3rd Annual Oakland Women’s March on Saturday, January 19, and all musicians are welcome to join the band. A rehearsal is planned for January 12 at the BFUU Fellowship Hall, 1924 Cedar Street, Berkeley. Check for more details at Nasty Woman Band on Facebook.

Compiled by Blake Dillon

CALENDAR OF UPCOMING EVENTS http://sfbaytimes.com/

10 Thursday

defeat the Briggs Initiative in 1978. http://www.glbthistory.org

Bohemian Rhapsody @ Castro Theatre, 429 Castro Street. The award-winning movie brings to the big screen the story of Freddie Mercury’s rise to worldwide fame. 6:15pm and 9pm. http://www.castrotheatre.com

GBTQ+ Dads Support Group @ Our Family Coalition, 1385 Mission Street. An eight-week support group for gay, bi, trans and queer men to connect with other dads, discuss parenting strategies and share resources. 6pm. http://www.outframily.org

Book Talk & Signing with Richard McKay, MD @ James C. Hormel LGBTQIA Center, San Francisco Main Library, 100 Larkin Street. McKay will discuss his book Patient Zero and the Making of the AIDS Epidemic. 6-7:30pm. http://www.sfpl.org SF Sketchfest Tribute: Margaret Cho @ Marines Memorial Theatre, 609 Sutter Street. The Famous Cho will discuss her views on family, gay rights and more in conversation with Ben Fong-Torres, editor and writer at Rolling Stone. 7:30-9pm. http://www.sketchfest.com

11 Friday The Briggs Initiative: A Scary Proposition @ GLBT History Museum, 4127 18th Street. Continuing through January 20, the exhibit documents the campaign to

12 Saturday Nasty Woman Band Rehearsal for 3rd Annual Oakland Women’s March @ BFUU Fellowship Hall, 1924 Cedar Street, Berkeley. All musicians are welcome to join the Band, composed of a mix of amateurs and professionals, scheduled to perform again this year at the Oakland Women’s March on January 19. Nasty Woman Band on Facebook God Save the Queens: Queer Punk Night @ El Rio, 3158 Mission Street. Host/DJ Scott Toxins and guest DJ Dave Bones will spin punk and its sibling genres postpunk, protopunk, goth, deathrock, queercore, riot grrl, synthpunk and more. 9pm. http://www.elriosf.com

A History of World War II: The D-Day Invasion to the Fall of Berlin @ The Marsh San Francisco, 1062 Valencia Street. Written and performed by Theatre Rhino’s John Fisher, the show includes the history plus Fisher’s take on the generals who fought the battles and the actors who played them in the movies. Continues through February 2. http://www.themarch.org

13 Sunday Bookstore & Chocolate Crawl @ Dog Eared Books Castro, 489 Castro Street. The event is a walking tour, beginning at Dog Eared Books Castro, that visits some of the Bay Area’s best bookstores with frequent stops for chocolaty confections. 1-6pm. http://www.bookstorechocolate.wix.com Dot’s Sunday Hoedown @ The Ivy Room, 860 San Pablo Avenue, Albany. The every 2nd Sunday showcase of the Bay Area’s best live country, Americana, Rockabilly and roots will feature Tremolo Saints, Kate Burkart Band, Sean O’Brien and his Drooling Angels. 4pm. http:/www.ivyroom.com

14 Monday Sacred Table: Processing Death @ The Sausage Factory, 517 Castro Street. Companions of Dorothy the Worker will host a group discussion about experiences of death, facing our own and losing loved ones. 6:30-7:30pm. http://www.companionsofdorothy.org SF Sketchfest Tribute: Carol Burnett @ Castro Theatre, 429 Castro Street. Award-winning actress Carol Burnett will appear in person for a conversation and Q&A with actress Wendie Malick. 8-9:15pm. http://www.sketchfest.com Staged Reading of “Say You Love Satan!” @ Strut, 3rd Floor, 470 Castro Street. This special event at Strut will be performed in conjunction with Theatre Rhino. 7-9pm. http://www.strutsf.org

15 Tuesday Neighborhood Neon Icons and How to Save Them @ California Historical Society, 678 Mission Street. Tenderloin Museum’s Katie Conry will join Al Barna and Randall Ann Woman of the San Francisco Neon & Historic Sign Network to lead this program about the historic neon signs, including more than 100 in the Tenderloin, and their role as community icons. 6-8pm. http://www.tenderloinmuseum.org 22

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In the Name of Love - 10th Annual Musical Tribute Honoring Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. @ Paramount Theater, 2025 Broadway, Oakland. Mavis Staples headlines a lineup of entertainers that also includes PopLyfe, Oakland Interfaith Gospel Choir, Youth Speaks and more. 7pm. http://www.milktribute.com

16 Wednesday The State of the LGBT Rights Movement in the U.S. - What Are We Fighting for? @ Manny’s, 3092 16th Street. The discussion features NCLR’s Kate Kendell, Transgender Law Center’s Cecilia Chung and conversion therapy survivor Mathew Shurka in a deep dive conversation looking at the present and future status of the LGBT rights movement. 6:30-8pm. http://www.welcometomannys.com Mr. and Miss Golden Gate Gayme Night @ Brewcade SF, 2200 Market Street #B. This game night, held every 3rd Wednesday, benefits Strut. 7-10pm. http://www.brewcadesf.com Community Meeting with District 8 Supervisor Rafael Mandelman @ Eureka Valley/ Harvey Milk Memorial Branch Library, 1 Jose Sarria Court. An open discussion and Q&A with Supervisor Mandelman will be followed by updates from the Dolores Green Benefit District and Assistant District Attorney Vietnam Nguyen. 5:45-8pm. Smack Dab Open Mic! @ Dog Eared Books Castro, 489 Castro Street. You are invited to bring five minutes of reading material or just be there to sit back and listen. 8pm. http://www.dogearedbooks.com Words and Music with Laurie Lewis, Claudia Russell, Don Henry and Nina Gerber @ Freight & Salvage Coffeehouse, 2020 Addison, Berkeley. The show features an amazing lineup of award-winning musicians who are funny as well as thought-provoking. 8pm. http://www.thefreight.org

17 Thursday A Panel on Indigenous Queer Voices @ Strut, 470 Castro Street. Queer & Trans People of Color at Strut and EFNIKS host a night for Indigenous Queer Voices featuring a conversation on erasure and colonization, amplifying Indigenous voices and stories showing that Native people are still here. http://www.strutsf.org SF Sketchfest NightLife @ California Academy of Sciences,

55 Music Concourse Drive. A knee-slapping night of creatures, cocktails and comedy is planned featuring stand-up comic Jon Glaser, live podcasts, live improv science fiction and a comedy lineup on the main stage and more. 6-10pm. http://www.bit.ly/2nModis Reading and Book Signing with Author Brian Belovitch @ Dog Eared Books, Castro, 489 Castro Street. The author will present the new book Trans Figured: My Journey from Boy to Girl to Woman to Man, a revealing memoir chronicling a fascinating journey that includes stops at Studio 54 and near-death experiences. 7pm. http://www.dogearedbooks.com

18 Friday Comedy Returns to El Rio @ El Rio, 3158 Mission Street. The show features Bernadette Luckett, Joe Klocek, Chey Bell, Arjun Banerjee and Lisa Geduldig. 7pm. http://www.elriosf.com The Eve of the March Celebration of the Divine Feminine in Song @ Grace Cathedral, 1100 California Street. Vajra Voices and Kitka Women’s Vocal Ensemble with instrumentalist Shira Kammen and vocalist Theresa Wong will present a program honoring the 2019 Women’s March. 7:30-10pm. http://www.vajravoices.com Ru Paul’s All Stars 4 Viewing Party @ Castro Country Club, 4058 18th Street. All are welcome for this weekly viewing party where everyone roots for their favorite All Star enjoying some good, somewhat clean and definitely sober time with door-prizes, mini-contests and guest co-hosts. http://www.castrocountryclub.org

19 Saturday Women’s March San Francisco - Action SF @ Meeting Point at 10:15am: Noe Valley Town Square, 24th Street between Vicksburg and Sanchez, and 11:30am: Civic Center, Southwest Lawn at Polk and Grove. The Noe Valley United Against Hate group has invited all who are interested to join their contingent in the march. E-mail actionsfteam@gmail.com Book Launch: Like Flesh Covers Bone @ Frank Bette Center for the Arts, 1601 Paru Street. Alameda. Oakland poet Jan Steckel will read from her new book Like Flesh Covers Bone followed by an Open Mic hosted by Jeanne Lupton. 7-10pm. http://www.jansteckel.com

20 Sunday Cantor Unplugged @ Congregation Sha’ar Zahav, 290 Delores Street. Cantor Sharon Bernstein will lead an evening of music, singing and community with the theme “The Broadway SingAlong Edition.” 8-9:30pm. http://www.shaarzahav.org

21 Monday MLK Day of Service 2019 Shoreline Cleanup @ Aquatic Park, 499 Jefferson Street. Aquarium by the Bay and SF Maritime National Historical Park host this annual beach cleanup where all are welcome to join and volunteer. 10am-1pm. http://www.aquariumofthebay.org Racism Under the Rainbow: Breaking Bread @ Oakland LGBTQ Community Center and SPECTRUM Queer Media, 3207 Lakeshore Avenue, Oakland. The event provides a supportive environment to address the reality of intersectional racism and its effects in the LGBTQIA+ community. 4:30-7:30pm. http://www.oaklandlgbtqcenter.org Odd Mondays Celebration of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. @ Haystack Pizza, 3881 24th Street. Supervisor Rafael Mandelman will join Ajuan Mance, David Brown, Charles McCullough and Thea Matthews for a panel discussion and no-host supper. 7pm. http://www.oddmondays.com

22 Tuesday You SA Ho Bingo with Holotta & Saki @ Club 1220, 1220 Pine Street, Walnut Creek. Drag Bingo hosted by Holotta Tymes and Saki Samora. 7pm. http://bit.ly/2rkdMS4 Sister Circle @ Openhouse, 55 Laguna. A monthly 4th Tuesday event for women-identified LGBTQ community members to make new connections in a luncheon setting. 12-1:30pm. sylvia@openhouse-sf.org Ginger’s Karaoke with DJ Shaggy @ Gingers, 86 Hardie Place. Every Tuesday everyone is a star, or wants to be, at this no judgement event with “the good, the bad and the fab.” 8pm-1am. http://www.gingersbar.com

23 Wednesday Stonewall: Damn, Daddy! @ Strut, 3rd Floor, 470 Castro Street. The event is a discussion group featuring real talk about getting older as a gay man and how to make the most of it. 2-3:30pm. http://www.strutsf.org World Premiere of “Candlestick” @ ACT Costume Shop Theater, 1117 Market Street. Part wake and part celebration, the storyline follows a group of longtime Bayview residents and 49ers fans tailgating during the final season at Candlestick Park as they struggle to hold on to something permanent in the face of change. “Candlestick” by Ben Fisher on Facebook

24 Thursday Fighting Back - Stop AIDS Now or Else: Protest as Community Catalyst @ GLBT History Museum, 4127 18th Street. The latest in the monthly Fighting Back series, the event will bring together a panel of allies, organizers, activists and historians reflecting on what it meant to be an AIDS activist and organizer when Stop AIDS Now’s sit-in shut down traffic on the Golden Gate Bridge on January 21, 1989. 7-9pm. http://www.glbthistory.org S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

JANUARY 10, 2019