San Francisco Bay Times - May 4, 2017

SPECIAL SECTIONS Family Builders pages 9–11 SF Small Business Week pages 16–18

May 4–17, 2017 | sfbaytimes.com

Carnaval 2017 pages 25–27

Family Builders Shows that Love, Not Blood, Makes a Family

In the News Compiled by Dennis McMillan Supreme Court Lets Stand California Ban on Anti-Gay Therapy The Supreme Court has again rejected a challenge to California’s ban on so-called gay conversion therapy. The justices did not comment on May 1 in turning away an appeal from a San Diego minister and others who argued the law violated their First Amendment religious freedoms. The federal appeals court in San Francisco had previously upheld the law in dismissing the constitutional challenge. Governor Jerry Brown signed the ban into law in late 2012. Since then, the Supreme Court has rejected efforts to upend the California law and a similar ban in New Jersey. edgemedianetwork.com Chelsea Manning to be Released on IDAHOT 2017 In one of his last moves in office, President Obama commuted all but four months of the remaining prison sentence of Chelsea Manning, the Army intelligence analyst convicted of a 2010 leak that revealed American military and diplomatic activities across the world. As reported by the New York Times, “the decision

by Mr. Obama rescued Ms. Manning, who twice tried to kill herself last year, from an uncertain future as a transgender woman incarcerated at the men’s military prison at Fort Leavenworth, Kansas. She has been jailed for nearly seven years, and her 35-year sentence was by far the longest punishment ever imposed in the United States for a leak conviction.” The date of the liberation coincides with the IDAHOT, on May 17, which turns this decision into a much broader acknowledgment of the situation faced by Trans prisoners in U.S. jails. This act will definitely constitute a way for President Obama to mark the IDAHOT once more even beyond his term. dayagainsthomophobia.org Rafael Mandelman Announces Run for Supervisor of District 8 San Francisco Bay Times columnist Rafael Mandelman, who has served as a member of the City College of San Francisco Board of Trustees since 2013 and is Chair of the Board of the San Francisco LGBT Community Center, has announced that he is running for Supervisor of District 8. The district includes the Castro, Noe Valley, and Glen Park neighborhoods. Mandelman previously ran a strong campaign for the seat in 2010, but lost to Scott Wiener, who is now a member of the California State Senate. “I often tell people that coming in second in the 2010 District 8 race was one of the most valuable experiences of my life,” Mandelman, who is also a Deputy City Attorney for the City of Oakland, shared in an email to his supporters. “Learning from setbacks and using them to become a stronger person is something I take pride in. And that race taught me a lesson in what kind of leader I want to be and what kind of Supervisor District 8 deserves. Someone who will be the hardest working person in City Hall, who will be a fierce advocate for D8 Residents, and who isn’t afraid to stand up for common sense.

I promise to be the hardest working candidate you’ve ever seen. I’m going to run a strong, communityminded and data-based campaign.

I’m going to be out there knocking on every door, at every event, earning the votes and endorsements of my neighbors and sharing my vision for the future of San Francisco. I have the experience, I have the vision, I have the campaign team—now I need your support.” rafaelmandelman.com

New Rainbow Font Pays Tribute to Pride Flag Creator, Gilbert Baker The recent passing of Gilbert Baker—the artist and advocate who created the first rainbow flag that is ubiquitous worldwide as the symbol of the LGBTQ community—inspired a community arts and media organization and the organizers of NYC Pride to create a fitting 21st century memorial. NYC Pride announced a new font created with the design team at advertising giant Ogilvy & Mather. The new font is called “Gilbert,” and was inspired by his greatest creation, the rainbow flag. “We wanted to create something special that would not just honor Gilbert and his iconic Rainbow Flag, but also give the LGBTQ community a fantastic tool to help them create their own banners, posters and signs. People can now raise the Rainbow Flag with every letter they type.

By literally embedding the Rainbow Flag into the font, we made it possible for everyone around the world to type with pride.” The team indicated they’re hoping for feedback on the design. See the font at: https://www.typewithpride.com/ lgbtqnation.com/2017/04/new-font Judge Blocks Trump Effort to Withhold Money from Sanctuary Cities A judge in San Francisco temporarily blocked President Trump’s efforts to starve localities of federal funds when they limit their cooperation with immigration enforcement—a stinging rejection of his threats to make so-called sanctuary cities fall in line.

The judge, William H. Orrick of United States District Court, wrote that the president had overstepped his powers with his January executive order on immigration by tying billions of dollars in federal funding to immigration enforcement. Judge Orrick said only Congress could place such conditions on spending. “This is why we have courts—to halt the overreach of a president and an attorney general who either don’t understand the Constitution or chose to ignore it,” Dennis Herrera, the San Francisco city attorney, said in a statement. “Because San Francisco took this president to court, we’ve been able to protect billions of dollars that fund lifesaving programs across this country.” Orrick strongly signaled that San Francisco and Santa Clara County, the plaintiffs in the case, were likely to win a permanent victory. nytimes.com Consecration of Gay Bishop Against Church Law, United Methodist Court Says The United Methodist Church’s top court has ruled that the consecration of an openly gay pastor as bishop is against church law. But in a somewhat muddled ruling that could reflect the ongoing struggle to determine how great a role LGBTQ members can play in the second largest Protestant denomination in the U.S., the court also ruled that the Rev. Karen Oliveto, formerly senior pastor of Glide Memorial Church in San Francisco, its first openly gay bishop, “remains in good standing.”

The decision follows Oliveto’s consecration last July as bishop of the United Methodist Church’s Mountain Sky Area, which includes churches in Colorado, Utah, Wyoming and Montana, as well as one church in Idaho. The Judicial Council decided 6–3 that it was not lawful for any regional church body to consecrate a “selfavowed practicing homosexual bishop.” sfweekly.com (continued on page 22) S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES M AY 4, 2017

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Into the Fray nity need for such space, while also better serving the needs of Center clients and ensuring the long-term financial sustainability of the building.

A San Francisco Kind of Democrat Rafael Mandelman A Big Weekend for the LGBT Center On April 8, our LGBT Community Center celebrated its 15th Anniversary at our annual Soirée at Terra Gallery. Abundant thanks to all those who worked so hard to make the evening a smashing success, starting with Soirée Co-Chairs Nicholas Gonzalez and Sally Jesmonth, along with Roberto Ordeñana, the Center’s Development Director, and his amazing team.

The following day, April 9, the Center reopened its doors for an all-afternoon open house event to welcome the community back to our remodeled building. Former State Senator Mark Leno and current State Senator Scott Wiener, both of whom had labored mightily to open the building back in 2002 and have been great friends to the Center since then, offered their ref lections on the role the Center plays in our community, its past and its bright future. The San Francisco Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band and San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus performed, and author Marvin White offered a powerful invocation.

It was a special thrill for Board and staff to see community members exploring the renovated spaces, especially knowing that the addition of approximately 15,000 square feet of nonprofit office space to the building will simultaneously help meet a pressing commu-

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Outrage Over Chechnya On the evening of April 18, my Community College Board colleague Tom Temprano and I helped organize a candlelight vigil outside the Russian consulate to protest the horrific persecution of gay men in Chechnya.

At the vigil, I spoke about my memories of protesting outside the then-Soviet consulate as a kid back in the eighties to protest the treatment of Soviet Jewry and, we hoped, to shame the Soviet government into allowing the refuseniks to leave. I noted that back in 2013, when the Russian government began a campaign of harassment against LGBT people, it was the Jewish Community Relations Council, so active in the fight for Soviet Jewry, and recognizing the connection between the struggles of the Soviet Jews back in the seventies and eighties and the persecution of the Russian gays more recently, convened us for town halls and a protest back in front of the very same consulate.

At the end of the vigil, after various politicos had spoken, Cleve Jones closed the program expressing his frustration that our community had not been able to mount a more effective response back in 2013 and challenging us to come up with a boycott or other action that would actually cause some pain to the Russian leadership this time.

I share that frustration. At the same time, I am tremendously grateful to Cleve and the dozens of folks who turned out for the vigil.

Vigils and protests alone will not stop the horror that is taking place in Chechnya, but silence in the face of such horror is not a moral option. In preparing for the vigil, I came across a quote from David Waksberg, a former director of the Bay Area Council on Soviet Jews: “We can’t know

SA N F RANCISCO BAY T I ME S MAY 4 , 2 0 1 7

the impact of what we do, but we can be sure of the impact if we do nothing.”

Free City College!

Free City College is on track for implementation this year, and with the College’s financial future dependent on our ability to reverse the substantial decline in enrollment over the last five years, a lot is riding on the success of that implementation.

College administrators and staff have been hard at work making necessary changes to the website and enrollment processes to implement the program for the fall 2017 semester. City College has long been a terrific bargain, and with the City now covering the cost of enrollment for San Francisco residents, it’s an even better deal. Online registration for continuing students begins May 3, and online registration for new students starts May 24. Sign up for a class!

Into the Fray And finally, for those of you who have not heard, I have announced that I will be running for District 8 Supervisor in the June 2018 primary election (to fill out the remainder of Scott Wiener’s term) and November 2018 (for the term beginning in January 2018). District 8 is a very special place, encompassing Duboce Triangle, the Castro, Noe Valley, Glen Park, Diamond Heights, Twin Peaks and parts of the Mission. The District’s voters are among the City’s smartest and best informed, and having previously elected Mark Leno, Bevan Dufty and Scott Wiener, they have high expectations for their Supervisor. I am looking forward to spending the next year talking with the voters about the needs of our neighborhoods and the challenges facing the City. It will be an adventure!

Rafael Mandelman is a Deputy City Attorney for the City of Oakland. He has served as a member of the City College of San Francisco Board of Trustees since 2013, and is Chair of the Board of the San Francisco LGBT Community Center.

Yom Hashoah - Holocaust Remembrance Day 2017 Photos by Rink

Yom Hashoa h is obser ved as Israel’s day of commemoration for the approximately six million victims who perished in the Holocaust. A meaningful Holocaust Remembrance Day ceremony also took place here in San Francisco at the SF Jewish Community Center on April 23. “The Future of Our Past: A Conversation About Memory and Testimony” was the title of the event, which was attended by Holocaust sur v ivors, students and ot her commun it y members. Participants lit candles and spoke of their memories and reflections.

Similar observances were held in cities all over the world.

Famous

What does it mean to be famous?

Such a question seems apt for a college philosophy or ethics class or something that Cher, Madonna, or Lady Gaga might ponder in a quiet moment. However, the query also lies at the heart of an extraordinary concurring opinion to a pro forma, one sentence order in transgender teen Gavin Grimm’s lawsuit to be able to use the bathroom that matches his gender.

In the opinion, Senior Judge Andre Davis of the 4th Circuit Court of Appeals first praises Grimm’s eloquence, intelligence, and perseverance in pursing justice. In describing Gavin’s courageous testimony before his School Board, Judge Davis notes how Gavin “explained that he is a person worthy of dignity and privacy. He explained why it is humiliating to be segregated from the general population.” Gavin “knew, intuitively, what the law has in recent decades acknowledged: the perpetuation of stereotypes is one of many

Then the 68-year-old senior judge from his seat of enormous power on the federal court of appeals reached out personally to Gavin, the struggling transgender high school senior.

He wrote: “by challenging unjust policies rooted in invidious discrimination, [Gavin Grimm] takes his place among other modern-day human rights leaders who strive to ensure that, one day, equality will prevail, and that the core dignity of every one of our brothers and sisters is respected by lawmakers and others who wield power over their lives.” He likened Grimm to such famous names in the law as Korematsu, Brown, Loving, Windsor, and

But Judge Davis recognized that the name Gav in Gr imm would likely not become a household name like the others.

From Judge Davis’s perspective, though, Gavin was already and would continue to be “famous” for a much more important reason.

Quoting Pales- Federal 4th Circuit Court Judge Andrew Davis tinian-Amerianything spectacular, but because it can poet Naomi Shehab Nye’s poem never forgot what it could do.”

“Famous,” Judge Davis stated: “Despite [Gavin’s] youth and the formi- Judge Davis is an African Ameridable power of those arrayed against can man who grew up in East Balhim at every stage of these proceed- timore (famous among other things, ings, ‘[Gavin] never forgot what [he] unfortunately, for its high homicide rate). According to Wikipecould do.’” dia, he was the son of a food serNye’s poem “Famous” reads in part: vices worker and schoolteacher, “The river is famous to the fish. The whose stepfather was a steel workloud voice is famous to silence, which er. Davis attended the prestigious knew it would inherit the earth be- Phillips Academy Andover, Unifore anybody said so … . I want to be versity of Pennsylvania, and Unifamous to shuffling men who smile versity of Maryland School of Law. while crossing streets … famous as He worked his way up to become a the one who smiled back. I want to be judge of the federal appellate courts, famous in the way a pulley is famous, just one tier below the U.S. Supreme or a buttonhole, not because it did Court in the federal judicial system.

Gavin Grimm

Few readers of this column will have heard of Judge Davis before now.

We hadn’t before the Gavin Grimm case. When one searches for the name Andre Davis on Google, two different pro football players come up as the top results. However, Judge Andre Davis is, and will always be, famous in our eyes because, in his efforts to fulfill his judicial responsibility to provide justice for Gavin Grimm and other transgender people, Judge Davis himself “never forgot what [he] could do.” He offers all of us the invitation to do the same.

John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, together for over three decades, were plaintiffs in the California case for equal marriage rights decided by the California Supreme Court in 2008. Their leadership in the nationwide grassroots organization Marriage Equality USA contributed in 2015 to making same-sex marriage legal nationwide.

PHOTO SOURCE: REWIRE.NEWS

John Lewis & Stuart Gaffney

Obergefell— those “who refused to accept quietly the injustices that were perpetuated against them.”

SOURCE: SIMMIEKNOW.COM

6/26 and Beyond

forms of invidious discrimination.”

But Judge Davis didn’t stop there.

He went on to lay out a broader vision of transgender equality and dignity. He wrote that the school board’s treatment of Grimm reveals “the inequities that arise when the government organizes society by outdated constructs like biological sex and gender.” Grimm’s “case is about much more than bathrooms.

It’s about a boy asking his school to treat him just like any other boy. It’s about protecting the rights of transgender people in public spaces and not forcing them to exist on the margins. It’s about governmental validation of the existence and experiences of transgender people, as well as the simple recognition of their humanity. His case is part of a larger movement that is redefining and broadening the scope of civil and human rights so that they extend to a vulnerable group that has traditionally been unrecognized, unrepresented, and unprotected.”

Openhouse Spring Fling 2017

Photos by Rink

The annual Openhouse Spring Fling 2017 was a huge success with a sellout - standing room only - brunch held at the San Francisco Fairmont Hotel on Sunday, April 30.

Celebrating the recent opening of the 55 Laguna property, the culmination of almost two decades of work, was the highlight of the occasion.

Legendary activist Cleve Jones received the Adelman Gurevitch Founders Award and Openhouse founder Dr. Marcy Adelman received the organization’s Trailblazer Award during the program featuring emcee Marga Gomez, event co-chairs Mina Tao and Neil Sims and other community leaders. Print copies of the San Francisco Bay Times commemorative issue published for the event, including an interview by Jewelle Gomez with Dr. Adelman and other special articles, can be requested by sending an e-mail to publisher@sfbaytimes.com

D ear Openhouse Community and Fr iends, A very heartfelt th ank you to the O penhouse Staf f an Award and the an d Board for the nounce ment of na Trailblazer ming the 95 La af ter Jeanette and guna housing co me. From me, my mmunity family and Jeanett for such a huge ho e’s family a huge nor. I am deeply thank you to uc he d an d hu mbled by this rec It has been my pr ognition. ivilege and an ho nor to serve alon committed people gside so many ge that make up th nerous and e Openhouse fam donors, elected of ily of board mem ficials, volunteers be rs, staff, an d community mem of what we have bers. We can all accomplished tog be proud ether.

T he hub of housin g and services at 55 and 95 Lagu the foundation for na , when complete a new chapter d, will be in Openhouse’s Executive D irecto history. Openhou r Karyn Skultet y se’s new is an amazingly and visionary lea talented , war mly der. She is just th relational e champion Ope deliver a br ight ne nhouse needs to w future of innova de velop and tive aging service all LGBT people s and resources to are able to thrive ensure that and grow in an in mutual respect an tergenerational co d love. mmunity of W ith love , Marcy

Emcee Marga Gomez

Celebrating Dr. Marcy Adelman on stage were Openhouse Board Chair Stan Watson and Karyn Skultety, PhD, Executive Director

Openhouse supporters Sarah Schnepf, Hon. Leslie Katz and Linda Scaparotti, Esq.

Alba Barreto and Dr Sandra Hernandez Honoree Cleve Jones

An Openhouse volunteer displays a collage about the life of Harvey Milk by artist Bill Bowers. It was an item in the event auction.

Dr. Marcy Adelman receving her award presented by Hon. Mark Leno

Academy of Friend’s Beth Feingold and Positive Resource Center’s Gayle Roberts with a friend

San Francisco Bay Times columnist Dennis McMillan with Openhouse supporters Saralie Pennington and her husband Tom Herz

Honoree Cleve Jones, Royce Lin, MD of UCSF and Horizon Foundation’s Roger Doughy

More than 400 guests attended Spring Fling 2017.

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Openhouse Executive Director Karyn Skultety and Programs Director Michelle Alcedo with honoree MJ Isabel and Ziba the dog

SF LGBT Center Board & City College Board Chair Rafael Mandelman, Esq. who is a San Francisco Bay Times columnist, and Daniel Redman, Esq

FAMILY BUILDERS: Every child has the right to grow up in a permanent, nurturing family

Dads’ Unconditional Love and Support Reflect in Their Beautiful Daughter

Robbie and Marcus with their daughter, Apple

By Elizabeth Cotterell

“The way Apple changed our lives is beyond words. It’s amazing to see how a child can thrive when they’re put into the right situation … and what they can overcome with good care, love, positive attention, and nurturing parents.” –Robbie McMillan

R

obbie and Marcus had been together for over 10 years when they decided they wanted to be dads. They had an overwhelming desire to pass on their knowledge to help someone navigate through life—to teach someone how to respect others, and how to appreciate the vast diversity in the world. More importantly, they wanted to guide someone who has no one else to guide them, which is why they chose to grow their family by adopting a child from the foster care system.

Robbie and Marcus spent countless hours researching the different agencies in the Bay Area that focused on adoption through foster care, but couldn’t find an organization that truly made them feel welcomed as a mixed-race gay couple. After reaching out to some friends in the area, they were referred to Family Builders—a local nonprofit that helps LGBT individuals/couples adopt children from the foster care system. They decided to attend one of Family Builders’ monthly Orientations, and left feeling over(continued on page 10) S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES M AY 4, 2017

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FAMILY BUILDERS: Every child has the right to grow up in a permanent, nurturing family Photos Courtesy of Family Builders

COTTERELL (continued) whelmingly confident that not only was the fost-adopt (adoption through foster care) process the right path for them, but also that Family Builders was the right organization to guide them on their journey to parenthood.

After completing all of the program requirements to become a certified family, they were soon matched with a three-month-old infant named Apple. Overwhelmed with excitement and anticipation, they walked into the building on a Tuesday afternoon to meet their daughter for the first time. It was on that day that their lives changed forever. They were now dads to a beautiful baby girl—full of happiness, love, pride and joy for the life they now have to look forward to.

Apple has grown tremendously over the last four years, and is thriving thanks to the unconditional love and support she receives from her dads. For over forty years, Family Builders has helped children like Apple find loving, supportive parents like Robbie and Marcus, transforming the lives of countless children in foster care.

Children who are adopted see a myriad of benefits as opposed to children who remain in foster care. They see a 50 percent increase in educational progress, are 23 percent more likely to graduate from high school or get a GED, are 50 percent less likely to be arrested, are 20 percent less likely to become a teen parent, are 24 percent less likely to be unemployed, and are significantly less likely to become homeless. With more than 61,000 children currently in California’s foster care system, there is a tremendous need for more families to step up and consider adoption through foster care.

Who is eligible to be a potential adoptive parent? Family Builders welcome all individuals and couples to learn about the fost-adopt process, and every interested potential adoptive parent—regardless of age, race, gender, sexual orientation, gender identity, relation or marital status, religion, national origin, disability status, domestic partner status, veteran status, HIV/AIDS status etc.—is considered and evaluated based on their ability to meet the diverse needs of children in foster care. Additionally, they offer services in English and Spanish and welcome monolingual Spanish-speaking families as potential adoptive parents.

The first step in the process to become a foster or adoptive parent is to attend Family Builders’ Orientation—a two-hour information session explaining the ins-and-outs of the fost-adopt process. The intent of the Orientation is to ensure attendees have enough information about the process to make an informed decision as to whether or not the fost-adopt program is right for them.

In addition to adoption services, Family Builders offers an array of programs to support children, youth and their families impacted by the foster care system, and is looking to expand vital LGBT services in the coming years. Family Builders can be reached at 510-536-KIDS (5437).

If you are interested in attending a Family Builders Orientation, they are held: Every 1st Saturday of the month, 9:45 am–12:00 pm, at Family Builders Office (1900 Embarcadero Suite 303, Oakland, CA 94606) Every 2nd Tuesday of the month, 6:00 pm– 8:00 pm, at Unitarian Universalist Church (1187 Franklin St, San Francisco, CA 94109) Elizabeth Cotterell is the Development Director of Family Builders, http://www.familybuilders.org/

LGBT Adoptions and the Current Political Climate

By Elizabeth Cotterell With many changes taking place at the national level, there has been much concern from LGBT families regarding the status of their completed adoptions and/or adoptions in progress. Families wonder whether they should continue to consider, or pursue, adoption at this time.

In the state of California, there is currently no threat to prospective or existing adoptions, and there is no reason that LGBT individuals/couples should refrain from adopting at this time. California law prohibits discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, and cannot be overruled by even an Executive Order. Furthermore, there was a recent Supreme Court decision, V.L. v. E.L, which requires that states give full faith and credit to adoption judgments from other states.

This means that all adoptions that are finalized in California must be respected—full faith and credit—in other states, regardless of that state’s laws and policies.

It is possible that there will be an executive order issued allowing child welfare organizations and adoption agencies to discriminate on religious grounds, as there has been recent legislation to this effect in other states. California law, however, would still prohibit this in the state of California.

There are currently over 60,000 children in foster care in California.

Many of these children need permanent adoptive families. For all individuals and couples, now is a great time to consider becoming adoptive parents and to begin the process.

Family Builders can be reached at 510-536-5437.

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SA N FRANCISCO BAY T I ME S MAY 4 , 2 0 1 7

Marcus, Apple and Robbie celebrating the Holiday Season

Family Builders to Host Spring Gala at Rotunda Family Builders will host its Annual Spring Gala on Thursday, May 25, at 6:00 pm at the Rotunda at Neiman Marcus. Funds raised through this event will be used toward programs that support permanency for all children and youth in foster care.

The evening will begin with a cocktail reception at the Rotunda, located on the 4th floor of Neiman Marcus, where guests will have a chance to mingle.

This will be followed by a live auction. Auction items include Warriors tickets, a Medical Spa treatment, lunch with the Honorable Willie L. Brown, an interior design package from Aubrey Maxwell, a photography package from Joshua Ets-Hokin, and a wine experience. The Honorable Willie L. Brown will serve as Auctioneer and Liam Mayclem will be the Master of Ceremonies.

The funds raised from the Family Builders Spring Gala are vital in helping children in foster care find loving, permanent families, and helping youth and their families impacted by the foster care system.

Early Bird tickets are available until May 15 for $125. After May 15, tickets will be $150. For more information or to purchase tickets, please visit the Family Builders Día del Niño Gala website on Eventbrite.com (https://www. eventbrite.com/e/family-builders-dia-del-nino-gala-tickets-33475018682), or contact Family Builders at development@familybuilders.org

S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES M AY 4, 2017

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2017 San Francisco Pride Marshals Named The 47th Annual San Francisco LGBT Pride Celebration and Parade will be held on June 24 and 25, 2017. The Parade/March is Sunday, June 25, in the heart of downtown San Francisco beginning at 10:30 am. A two-day Celebration and Rally is scheduled from Noon to 6:00 pm on Saturday, June 24, and from 11:00 am to 6:00 pm on Sunday, June 25, at San Francisco’s Civic Center Plaza and surrounding neighborhood.

San Francisco Pride recently announced initial programing for the 2017 Main Stage. Maysam Sodagari, a legal immigrant from Iran with a PhD in chemical engineering who has been living in the United States for the past nine years, is scheduled to speak at the Celebration/Rally.

U.S. Customs officials detained Sodagari during the executive order that temporarily banned people from seven predominantly Muslim countries, and all refugees from entering the United States. More speakers addressing critical issues facing LGBTQ communities are being planned for both Saturday and Sunday.

Pride of Ownership • Direct mortgage lender and broker • Purchase and refinance loans

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San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus Community Grand Marshal, Organization, Selected by Public Vote For nearly 40 years, the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus has served as an international standard bearer for a powerful mix of extraordinary musical excellence and mission-driven activism.

Alex U. Inn Community Grand Marshal, Selected by the San Francisco Pride Membership Alex U. Inn (Carmen Alex Morrison), a Bay-Area resident for more than 35 years, is an advocate for justice and equality, fighting for their rights and the rights of others, and speaking truth to power.

Amy Sueyoshi Community Grand Marshal, Selected by the SF Pride Board of Directors Amy Sueyoshi is an educator, activist, and leading scholar in queer Asian American history. Her work addresses Orientalism, cross-dressing, and interracial desire.

Danielle Castro

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Subhi Nahas

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HERITAGE OF PRIDE AWARDS

Chris Carnes is a Bay Area LGBTQ activist, fundraiser, event producer, and philanthropist.

Brett Andrews

Jackie Cuneo

San Francisco Bay Times congratulates the 2017 Community Grand Marshals and Awardees, in recognition of their contributions to the LGBTQ movement. As SF Pride Executive Director George Ridgely, Jr., said: “Our Community Grand Marshals and Honorees are true reflections of LGBTQ communities in the Bay Area and their contributions are powerful examples of leadership and creativity.”

Community Grand Marshal, Selected by Public Vote

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Community Grand Marshal, Selected by the SF Pride Board of Directors

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In solidarity with the resistance movement that has been building momentum since the Women’s March in January, the San Francisco Pride Board of Directors—along with long-time activist Cleve Jones and one of this year’s Community Grand Marshals, Alex U. Inn—will lead this year’s Parade/March with a resistance contingent. This contingent will stand in defiance to the policies and actions of the current Administration that threaten the most vulnerable members of our community and undermine the hard-fought victories we have secured in our fight for equal rights.

COMMUNITY GR A ND MARSHALS

Amy Sueyoshi

Danielle Castro, Project Director of Community Based Research for the Center of Excellence for Transgender Health at the University of California, San Francisco, is a transgender community advocate who creates positive change through her work.

Dr. Marcy Adelman Lifetime Achievement Grand Marshal, Selected by the SF Pride Board of Directors Dr. Marcy Adelman is a widely-respected psychotherapist and pioneer in the field of lesbian and gay aging.

Brett Andrews Heritage of Pride—10 Years of Service Award—For those organizations, individuals, or other entities that have contributed at least ten years of consecutive service to the LGBTQ community Brett Andrews is the CEO of Positive Resource Center (PRC), a 30-yearold San Francisco-based nonprofit organization providing culturally appropriate legal benef its counseling and employment services to people disabled by mental health conditions or HIV/AIDS. El/La Para TransLatinas He r it a ge of P r i d e —P r i d e F reedom Award—For outstanding contributions to advancing civil rights and freedom for LGBTQ people

Blackberri

350 Rhode Island St. Suite 240 San Francisco, CA 94103 Branch NMLS ID# 1227415

Heritage of Pride —Pride Community Award—For outstanding service to LGBTQ communities Founded in 1977, the National Center for Lesbian Rights is a national legal organization committed to advancing the civil and human rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people and their families through litigation, legislation, policy, and public education.

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COMMEMORATION AWARDS Bay Area American Indian TwoSpirits Gilbert Baker Pride Founder’s Award—For those who have made a significant and historical impact on the LGBTQ community and the movement for LGBTQ rights Bay Area American Indian TwoSpirits exists to restore and recover the role of Two-Spirit people within the American Indian/First Nations community by creating a forum for the spiritual, cultural, and artistic expression of Two-Spirit people.

Subhi Nahas José Julio Sarria History Maker Award— Awarded to Bay Area people who make extraordinary changes in the way society views the LGBTQ community Subhi Nahas is a human rights activist and Syrian refugee. He is founder and Board Chair of the spectraproject.org; co-founder the first LGBTQ Syrian magazine, Mawaleh; and cofounder of a support group for LGBT refugees in Turkey.

Founded in 2006, the mission and vision of El/La Para TransLatinas is “to work to build a world where translatinas (transgender Latinas) feel they deserve to protect, love, and develop themselves.”

Maria Zamudio

National Center for Lesbian Rights

Maria Zamudio is a queer Mexican immigrant femme housing rights organizer with Causa Justa :: Just Cause, organizing mostly Latinx working class tenants in San Francisco.

Teddy Witherington Award—Recognizing those individuals who have contributed a longstanding, large body of work to the LGBTQ community

Blackberri The Audrey Joseph LGBTQ Entertainment Award—For those who have made a significant and historical impact, or left an indelible impression on the LGBTQ community and the movement for LGBTQ rights, through their artistic expression, or through their contribution within the entertainment industry Blackberri is a self-described artivist; a songstylist, songmaker, poet, writer, photographer, health educator, and community advocate.

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San Francisco Small Business Week/GGBA 2017

LGBT Business Networking During San Francisco Small Business Week San Francisco Sma l l Business Week, which takes place this year from May 15–20, is a partnership formed to honor and support the more than 85,000 small businesses and entrepreneurs that call San Francisco home. As part of National Small Business Week (https://www. sba.gov/nsbw/nsbw), the partnership celebrates the contributions and achievements of small business owners by offering a series of educational and networking events designed to inspire, educate and connect the members of our business community.

The largest LGBT business networking event during the Week is Mega Make Contact, set for May 16 from 6 pm–8 pm at the newly renovated San Francisco LGBT Community Center. The Golden Gate Business Association (GGBA) will be host-

ing the event with StartOut, the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce, the Rainbow Chamber of Silicon Valley, Castro Merchants and the LGBT Bar Association BALIF. If you are seeking work, hoping to transition into a new career, desiring to promote your business, or just wanting to meet likeminded others, then we highly recommend going to Mega Make Contact, which is free for both GGBA members and nonmembers.

To register for Mega Make Contact: http://ggba.chambermaster. com/events/details/mega-makecontact-2211 For more information about San Francisco Small Business Week, including other related events and conferences: http://www.sfsmallbusinessweek.com/

GGBA Wins Competition to Host 2018 WBA LGBT Economic Summit and Conference LGBT Business Leaders from 17 Cities and 5 States to Descend on SF in March 2018

In 1994, the LGBT Chambers of Commerce from throughout the Western United States gathered for the first time to form the Western Business Alliance (WBA) in order to support the growth of the yet to be defined LGBT Economic Equality Movement. Fast for ward to 2016 and the WBA now represents LGBT professional associations and business leaders from seventeen cities and 5 states plus Vancouver, B.C. San Francisco’s very own Golden Gate Business Association (GGBA) was one of the founding members of the WBA and it holds a unique position in the organization as the very first LGBT Chamber of Commerce in the United States, being founded in 1974. With members who live and do business across San Francisco, Alameda, Contra Costa, San Mateo, Marin counties, and beyond, GGBA serves as the voice for the San Francisco/Bay Area’s LGBT business community. The GGBA’s mission is to champion opportunity, development, and advocacy for our LGBT & Allied business community.

In March 2017, it was announced that the GGBA had won the competition to host the WBA’s LGBT Economic Summit and Conference.

This means that LGBT businesses and thought leaders from cities such as Seattle, Portland, Los Angeles, San Diego, Salt Lake City, Anchorage, Honolulu, Tucson, San Jose, Sacramento and Las Vegas will be gathering in the very city where the movement began.

“This is going to be an extraordinary three days of events and activities,” said Dawn Ackerman, GGBA’s President. “San Francisco holds a special place in our move16

SA N FRANCISCO BAY T I ME S MAY 4 , 2 0 1 7

ment and to have business leaders who are creating hundreds of thousands of jobs across the West is almost like a homecoming of sorts.”

Dawn Ackerman

“We are at a critical point in our country’s history,” Paul Pendergast, G GB A’s C h a i r of Public Policy, said. “The rights we have won as a community are in Paul Pendergast danger of being rolled back by an administration that does not champion inclusion and diversity.”

The WBA’s LGBT Economic Summit (Thursday, March 15 through Saturday, March 17, 2018) will address issues such as the alarming rates of LGBT homeless across the Western United States, the unique needs of millennial LGBT entrepreneurs in the coming decade, how “disruptive technologies” can play a key role in creating opportunities for LGBT start-ups, and how the LGBT business community can leverage its power to increase access to crowd-funding sources, angel investors and traditional loan programs.

“In the end,” Pendergast said, “we will emerge from the Summit with an economic agenda that the LGBT Chambers from 17 cities from across the West can implement in their respective cities, regions and states.”

The centerpiece of the March 2018 WBA LGBT Economic Summit and Conference will be “Power Lunch IV,” which has become the GGBA’s signature event. “This is going to be an exceptional opportu(continued on page 22)

San Francisco Small Business Week/GGBA 2017

We’re Employed and Unhappy, Now What?

Career Wisdom Julie Gleeson (Editor’s Note: San Francisco Bay Times welcomes new columnist Julie Gleeson, who will provide advice on how to have a more successful and personally rewarding work life. We are proud to feature Gleeson, who has over two decades of experience in helping clients at the business she co-founded with Sherry Platt Berman, the Career Wisdom Institute. For more information: http://careerwisdominstitute. com/) Frequently these days I hear that people are employed, which is good news, yet unhappy at their jobs, which is bad news. Is there anything you can do?

The answer is yes. Here are four steps that you can take now to boost your career satisfaction.

Take charge of your mood before you leave home.

Check your mood before you leave for work. Are you already annoyed?

Frustrated? Worried? These moods not only carry negative energy that people can feel, but they also cost you energy and the ability to have

fresh ideas. Moods are like the weather. They show up and pass through us as long as we let them.

Instead of blaming anything at work, try being neutral and curious for a week and see if you notice anything different in how you feel.

We are wired to be in good moods, by the way. Every time we tell that story about how bad things are we tank our mood. Let it go, and talk about what is working. By the way, neutral means no labels about yourself, anyone else or the project!

Just consider the basic facts.

Prioritize rest and sleeping.

Most of us are doing more with fewer resources. Because we want to do our best, we sacrifice our “offtime” to get the work done. Sleep studies tell us that every hour we miss in sleep is equivalent to one glass of wine. We have a work force that is working in an inebriated state! Meditating for a short period every few hours is amazingly restorative if you do it consistently.

Set a timer or bell on your phone to remind you. Don’t judge how it goes. Although your mind is busy, regular daily practice will give you amazing results through time, even if you can only meditate for about 5 minutes each day.

Start to notice what works about your work.

Making a list of things you are grateful for each day literally changes the way you view things.

Can you find small things at work that you appreciate? Write them down, and do this daily. If you end each day with at least two things you loved about your day, you will open up a whole new view of your work and career.

Listen for new thinking, even if it is annoying.

Most of us listen to prove our own point of view as being right. We “f ill in the blanks” in conversations so quickly that we are, in effect, only listening to ourselves, and not to the other people around us. Try asking questions you don’t know the answer to instead of telling people what you see. It seems like it takes too much time, but people will relax around you and everything will start to happen more quickly if they experience feeling heard, and appreciated. You will begin to see fresh ideas show up, and the team will connect at much deeper levels.

So, don’t take your mood seriously, make occasions to rest more, meditate, retrain your brain to focus on what works, and try listening to see a new perspective. If you have questions, please contact me at Gleesonj@CareerWisdomInstitute.com Maybe I’ll answer them in this new column!

Julie Gleeson is the Co-founder of Career Wisdom Institute and the Founder of The Art of Living, Inc. She brings over 25 years of experience as a consultant in the fields of resilience, stress and overwhelm elimination, career designing, and couples mentoring. Julie also co-authored a bestselling book, “Inside Job, 8 Secrets to Loving Your Work and Thriving” (Bush Street Press, 2012).

New Businesses in the Castro Castro Merchants President Daniel Bergerac recently compiled a list of businesses that have just opened, or are about to, in the Castro. We at the San Francisco Bay Times love our neighborhood, and welcome all of the new businesses. We hope that you can visit these, and the many other longstanding, great businesses here.

The Academy, 2166 Market Art Attack Gallery, 2358 Market Street ARTSAVESLIVES Studio + Gallery, 518 Castro Street Birch and Tailor, 4200-17th Street The Castro Fountain, 554 Castro Castro Turkish Delights, 451 Castro Corona Heights Market & Deli, 4400-17th Street Heather Coros Life Coaching, 4200-18th Street CryoSF, 2265 Market Deccan Spice, 468 Castro Duboce, 181 Sanchez Nicholas Goldman Law Guild Staging & Design, 550 Castro Street Kantine, 1906 Market Street Le Marais Bakery, 498 Sanchez Street Me & Tasty, 3970-17th Street Morac, 4230-18th Street 2175 Market Street (several new vendors upstairs at this location) Project Juice, 506 Castro R by Rolo, 2267 Market Street Wayne Rash, DPM, 4200-18th Street Resurface Skin Studio, 491 Castro Street Verve Coffee Roasters, 2101 Market Street

Eichen’s Lighting, established in 1957, is a family-owned and operated lighting center showcasing a broad selection of designer styles for all your lighting needs. With a refreshed look and modern merchandise, Eichen's Lighting offers quality customer service with competitive prices.

Our remodeled showroom features displays including Hubbardton Forge, Visual Comfort, Arteriors, Tech Lighting, Currey & Co., Robert Abbey and more!

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S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES M AY 4, 2017

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San Francisco Small Business Week/GGBA 2017

Essential Conversations About Family Wealth to have these conversations when all the important players in your estate plan can participate and communicate their wishes or questions. With time on your side, you can cover topics thoroughly and have time to get the proper documents in place, if you haven’t already.

Money Matters Brandon Miller How confident are you about your family’s f inances? How often do you discuss money with your loved ones? According to the Family Wealth Checkup study by Ameriprise Financial, there’s a correlation between financial confidence and communication. While many families are discussing financial issues, they tend to shy away from diving deep into topics like inheritance and estate planning, leaving some family members with unrealistic expectations.

Here are some tips to help you discuss money matters with your family.

Don’t wait for tragedy to bring up finances. Family conversations about finances lay the foundation for a more secure financial future for the people closest to you. Nine in 10 adult children say a life-altering event triggered a financial talk with their parents. It’s a good idea

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Auto Philip Ruth Changing your image can take time. If the world knows you as one thing, and then you want to become known as another, you might be tapping your watch as you wait for others to adjust their expectations.

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Share your agenda ahead of time so that your family can prepare for the conversation.

Consider starting the conversation by sharing your financial goals and values, and telling your family why these discussions are important to you. Other topics on the agenda may include managing current finances including any debt, healthcare costs and legacy planning.

Create or update your estate plan. Pair your conversations with a comprehensive estate plan to prevent rifts that can happen when financial wishes are not clearly documented. Your estate encompasses anything you own, such as real estate, cars, life insurance, financial accounts including your retirement plans, and personal possessions.

Creating a plan for what happens to these assets and accounts is important, no matter the size of your estate.

If you already have an estate plan in place, revisit your will or trust, and update beneficiaries to various accounts and assets to mirror the blueprint you’ve shared with family members. Consider also providing instructions in a healthcare directive on what you want your family to do in the event that you cannot act on your own behalf. Clearly docu(continued on page 22)

cy. In the 10 or so hours that the typical car buyer spends researching their purchase, t hese K ias can’t help but come up.

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Make the conversation a priority and schedule a time to chat. Rather than hoping a conversation will happen after dinner, let each family member know ahead of time that you want to talk. Complex estates may require multiple discussions, so schedule a date to continue the conversation if needed. After your initial conversations, keep your family members up-to-date about changes that could affect your estate, such as establishing a living will or cashing in an annuity.

Two Hatchbacks from a Small Car Expert

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Although estate planning can be a tough and emotional topic to initiate, families who have talked about it say the discussion went much smoother than anticipated. Families said their conversations were straightforward and relaxed as opposed to awkward or diff icult— even more motivation to have the talk with your loved ones.

Manage expectations. You don’t have to divulge the exact value of your estate or the amount of money in your accounts, but it’s important to disclose enough details so that your family can set appropriate expectations. If part of your legacy plan includes leaving an inheritance, consider letting your family know whether it’s an amount large enough to help fund your grandchildren’s education or maybe it’s closer to a down payment on a car. Most people plan to leave an inheritance, but only 21 percent of parents have told their kids how much they can expect to receive.

South Korean carmaker Kia is experiencing this in automotive terms.

The company is known for small cars, but Kia’s balance sheet would benefit from greater volumes of the profitable luxury sedans, the Cadenza and K900.

Luxury is partly about image, and Kia’s still-developing heritage keeps its upper-priced cars selling in low volumes. The Cadenza sells about 15% of the competing Toyota Avalon’s volume, and the K900 runs about 11% of the Lexus LS’s. In wooing upscale buyers, Kia isn’t far from starting from scratch.

Kia is a pro with compacts, though.

The Soul continues to be a top pick even after years on the market, and the hybrid Niro is a subcompact crossover with outsized fuel efficien-

Pricewise, the Soul starts in the upper-economy class at $17K and reaches $30K in its fully-loaded “!” top trim. The Niro starts a bit higher at $24K—it is a hybrid, after all—and peak Niro runs about $33K. So you can get spendy with either, or you could save your pennies while still getting a reasonably well-equipped car.

The Niro promises to squeeze more of those pennies with its headline-grabbing 52-mpg EPA city rating for the lower three trims. The upper two drop that number to 46 mpg, and my loaded Touring tester’s mileage computer generally stayed above 40 mpg. The Niro has parsimony to spare.

It is short on power, though. Mild drivers may not mind the Niro’s half-awake acceleration, but my enthusiastic side was quickly frustrated not only with time it took for the Niro to gather speed, but also with its lag in engagement. I don’t make a practice of yelling at my test cars, but I found myself goading the Niro to “ just GO!” as it rolled backward down San Francisco’s steep grades with me flooring the accelerator and waiting for a response. San Francisco’s hills magnify the issue, but the Niro’s throttle lag should be carefully vetted on the pre-purchase test drive.

The tested Soul had its own conf licted dynamics, courtesy of the

Kia Soul

Kia Niro

top “!” trim’s seven-speed automatic transmission. Its own slow initial response was coupled with irksome busy-ness as it shuffled its gears. The mid-level Soul lacks a turbo and gives up 40 horsepower from the top trim, but it benefits from a simpler and more satisfying six-speed automatic.

While these two test Kias had some drive-ability kinks, their design, functionality and economy make them attractive to a wide array of compact car buyers. Kia will continue building its nascent luxury car presence. In the meantime, it would be nice if Kia could avail these versatile hatchbacks with a little powertrain finesse.

Philip Ruth is a Castro-based automotive photojournalist and consultant at www.gaycarguy. com. Check out his automotive staging service at www.carstaging.com

Sister Dana Sez: Words of Wisdumb from a Fun Nun vulnerable people. This action took place in coordination with actions in Oakland against the Sheriffs collaboration with ICE, across the Bay Area with nationwide marches, and a general strike against the new administration’s support for mass deportations, attacks on working people, and the planned construction of a wall on the U.S. Mexico border.

Sister Dana sez, “Happy Mother’s Day (May 4) to all you mothers out there, and that definitely includes drag mothers as well!”

Joining more than 600 cities worldwide, an estimated 15,000 people gathered at Justin Herman Plaza on Earth Day in the SAN FRANCISCO MARCH FOR SCIENCE to celebrate and stand up for scientific research and promote the use of evidence-based science in public policy.

The crowd chanted, “Science not silence!” as they moved down Market Street to end at Civic Center to hear speakers. One of my favorite placards simply succinctly stated, “Defiance 4 science!” Another pictured a cartoon of our planet wearing sunglasses and saying, “Make earth cool again!” Even the kids were marching, where a trio was spotted wearing red Trump-like trucker hats inscribed: “MAKE FACTS GREAT AGAIN!” LYRIC held its annual OPEN HOUSE, “QUEER NATION. QUEER MIGRATION,” at their LGBTQQ youth center, 127 Collingwood. It was a delightful evening of community, connection, and inspiration—showcasing LYRIC youth creativity with art and more in the “Purple House of Love Gallery.”

The patio was decorated in rainbow stripes and butterflies everywhere.

We were told the butterfly was a symbol of a safe space for undocumented queer and questioning youth there— many of whom told their emotional, sometimes heartbreaking stories. A large map indicated from where each had traveled to arrive here. LYRIC’s purple buttons given to us said it all: “QUEER YOUTH CREATE CHANGE!” lyric.org In one of the biggest MAY DAY demonstrations ever, on May 1, thousands of community members joined a powerful rally and march in Oakland in celebration of this year’s INTERNATIONAL WORKERS’ DAY. It was packed with fiery speeches, civil disobedience, cultural performances, art exhibits, and trainings on how to defend community members targeted by state violence. Given the Trump administration’s heightened threats and attacks against immigrants, people of color, LGBTQ communities, environmental protections, and working class people, the massive mobilization carried signs using the slogan of “Organize and Defend our Communities!”

Also on MAY DAY, hundreds gathered at San Francisco’s ICE Building to say no to the Trump Administration’s divisive, racist, and ignorant policies that target some of our most

OPENHOUSE’s SPRING FLING - BRUNCH & AUCTION was held Sunday noon at the Fairmont Hotel in honor of this year’s award recipients, Dr. Marcy Adelman and Cleve Jones. Everyone took portraits holding frames behind our proud faces declaring: “We refuse to be invisible!” #LGBTQEldersCount.

But after that, Master of Ceremonies comedian Marga Gomez introduced Co-Chairs Neil Sims & Minna Tao—who remarked that this was the largest attended Spring Fling ever. Gomez loudly shouted, “Hello my generation!”—then joking, “It’s a hundred days of Trump, and we definitely need cocktails!”

She said, “WE grew up to respect our elders, and now WE ARE the elders!” and continued to do a highly amusing standup act.

Executive Director Karyn Skulety joyfully announced that in August they will be breaking ground with 79 more new units of housing for LGBT seniors, as well as programming for the same. “I assure you, you will not be forgotten in this Trump era,” she guaranteed. She led us in a stirring chant: “Welcome home! Aging is a battle for ALL of us! Whose streets? OUR streets!”

For the Eva Lilly Service Awards, Marilyn Howard was not able to accept in person, as she had suffered a bad fall the night before, but MJ Isabell was there to stand and quietly accept.

Dr. Marcy Adelman proudly presented the Founder Award (herself a founder) to veteran activist Cleve Jones—mentioning all of his activism back from the early days of Harvey Milk to the present with Jones’ inspiration and consultation for the When We Rise TV docu-drama and also his latest best-selling book, When We Rise: My Life in the Movement. Jones paid special attention to the servers that day as an advocate on behalf of the hospitality workers’ union, UNITE HERE!, regarding homophobia in the workplace. He is a driving force behind the Sleep with the Right People campaign, aiming to convince LGBT tourists to stay only in hotels that respect the rights of their workers. By the way, Jones has recently been evicted from his rent-controlled apartment and warned, “We are being rapidly dispersed! This is wrong!” It needs to be mentioned that Jones co-founded the SAN FRANCISCO AIDS FOUNDATION in 1983, and founded the NAMES PROJECT AIDS MEMORIAL QUILT in 1987—among his many other achievements.

Sister Dana (aka Dennis McMillan) with Emperor Salvador Tovar applauding at the San Francisco Gay/Lesbian Freedom Band’s “Spotlight on Broadway,” a sing-along fundraiser, at the Sir Francis Drake Hotel on May 14, 2016.

Spotlight on Broadway 2017 will be held on Saturday, May 20. sflgfb.org

PHOTO BY DOUG LITWIN

By Sister Dana Van Iquity

Sister Dana sez, “All around the world, on May 17, advocates and activists are observing and participating in the International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, and Transphobia (IDAHOT).” dayagainsthomophobia.org

Former Senator Mark Leno presented the Trailblazer Award to Dr. Marcy Adelman, who called her “a magician and a miracle worker … with fierce commitment—who is still fighting today if not tomorrow.”

In the mid 1980’s Dr. Adelman founded Openhouse with her late partner, Jeanette Gurevitch, to develop a hub of LGBT welcoming elder housing and service (continued on page 22) S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES M AY 4, 2017

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The Most Frequently Asked Question friend?” Gay guys migrate from all over the country to urban gay centers in the hope of finding the one person who will make life worth living, and many wind up, like the questioner, feeling demoralized and discouraged.

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Tom Moon, MFT Q: I came here almost three years ago from a small town where there was no gay life. Maybe I was naïve, but I was sure that once I got here, I was going to find someone to love and spend my life with. I go out trying to meet guys, but mostly just wind up having quick sex. I spend a lot of time online looking for guys, but that just winds up being about quick sex, too.

I’m very disillusioned and discouraged. What am I doing wrong?

A: Therapists who work with gay men probably hear no question more frequently than: “How can I find a boy-

stuff. Lately, I find that I am seized with huge urges to liberate myself from some of the accumulation, and it’s not just the physical and material stuff. It’s the mental and emotional baggage as well. The challenge is simply getting started … and starting over.

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Many of us have had to leave families and whole communities where we weren’t welcome. Few of us reach adult life without having experienced ourselves as outsiders, as unwanted; and as a result, few of us have avoided at least some injuries to our self-esteem and ability to trust others. The most serious abuse and rejection for gay men tends to come from fathers, brothers and other boys in school— in other words, from other males. It is hardly surprising, then, that so many of us have both a deep longing for closeness with other men and a deep distrust of them.

The real issue, then, is not so much how to find a partner as it is how to be intimate, particularly with other men. How do you do this? I suggest that you set yourself the goal of finding five or six (nonsexual) gay friends whom you can trust enough to disclose your feelings and struggles.

Don’t confine yourself to clubs and the Internet in this search.

To help build community, commit yourself to participating in the life of your community. Familiarize yourself with the many LGBTQ organizations and interest groups that ex-

ist here. Whether it is political action, sports, art, dancing, etc., join with others who share your interests, or the interests you would like to develop.

Don’t make the mistake of attending just one event in an organization and then quitting because you do not feel comfortable. Social anxiety will be part of the process of exploration.

Don’t expect instant intimacy or belonging. In every venue you explore, you will initially be the stranger. Give others a chance to get to know you before you decide “this isn’t working.”

Above all, don’t scan a room and leave disappointed if you don’t immediately spot your future husband.

Real support systems develop over time that is measured in months and years, not days and weeks.

The point is to focus on building intimacy in your life first. It is in creating your gay “family” that you will acquire the social skills—the trust, loyalty, and concern for others—that are essential to being a good partner.

And, who knows? Maybe it is somewhere within this network that you will find the partner you are seeking.

Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. For more information, please visit his website http:// tommoon.net/

Starting Over

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CONTRIBUTORS Writers Rink, Sister Dana Van Iquity, Ann Rostow, Patrick Carney, Kate Kendell, Alex Randolph, Heidi Beeler, Gary M. Kramer, Dennis McMillan, Tom Moon, Tim Seelig, Cinder Ernst, John Chen Rafael Mandelman, Kit Kennedy, Phil Ting, Rebecca Kaplan, Leslie Katz, Philip Ruth, Bill Lipsky, Karen Williams, Donna Sachet, Gary Virginia, Zoe Dunning, Marcy Adelman, Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis Brandon Miller, Jamie Leno Zimron Thom Watson, Michele Karlsberg Lyndsey Schlax, Elisa Quinzi, Randy Coleman, Debra Walker, Wendy Ross, Howard Steiermann

A good way to begin thinking about this question is to appreciate the obstacles to intimacy that are placed in the way of LGBTQ people. Most of us sensed from an early age that we were different, and most of us “knew” that this difference was bad. If we were identified as gay by others in childhood or adolescence, that usually meant enduring ridicule at best, or even abuse and assault.

We collect together in large cities with the hope of finding love and community, but we bring our wounds with us. We form communities of outsiders. We often find that, even in these communities, it is not so easy to trust or to be trusted. We find that it is hard to connect with others or to allow others to get close to us, and we begin to doubt whether the term “gay community” means anything at all.

We are hurt by the “attitude” of other gay guys, but we find ourselves building walls of attitude ourselves to cover our own fear of rejection. We long for the partner who will release us from this cycle, but this longing often becomes an obsession, increasing our sense of separateness and loneliness.

Living the Laughter Lifestyle Karen Williams, M.Ed. Instead of saying, I’m damaged, I’m broken, I have trust issues, say I’m healing, I’m rediscovering myself, I’m starting over. Horacio Jones ( http:// www.goodreads.com/author/ show/13735180.Horacio_ Jones), Author, Broken Vision As a woman of a certain age, I am getting to be quite ref lective these days. It seems to me that I’ve spent a good part of my life accumulating

One of the many lessons I’ve learned from performing stand-up comedy for over three decades is the healing power of laughter. Laughter has the power to root you in the present moment, freeing you from thoughts of the past while liberating you from making projections about the future.

When you laugh, you are in the here and now, and being in the present is a great way to begin anew, moment by moment.

While that process sounds simple, there may be emotional wounds and mental hang-ups that get in your way. For example, I had an interaction with my mother that triggered some feelings for me about feeling loved. As the oldest of seven children, I had a great deal of responsibility, often serving as a surrogate parent in my family of origin. I ac-

cepted the added responsibility, relished my position in the family with pride, and manifested the classic “over-achiever” personality that often comes with such positioning.

The pervasive emotional underpinning that also settled into my psyche is that I felt significant only when I was “doing” for others. I felt that simply “being” me was not worthy of love from my parents, especially my mother. When I was triggered recently, I lashed out and accused Mom of only thinking of herself. Yet, based on the work I’ve done on myself over the years, I knew that I had to stay in the conversation no matter how uncomfortable I felt. Also, I did not want to be blameful nor overlook the peace and harmony that we’d been able to mutually create over the years.

The beauty of this challenging interaction with my mother is that it led me to state what I needed, and more importantly, what I wanted from her.

It was as simple as asking her to call me and to ask me how I am, rather than our phone contact to be initiated by me. My mother heard me,

and the very next day she laughingly called me and said with giggles in her voice, “How are you?” I returned the laughs and giggles, and our talk proceeded from there. I was so proud of Mom, and pretty happy with me too!

That this interaction took place at a time when I am seriously working on letting go of furnishings and other material possessions as I renovate my home is no small coincidence. I learned that I don’t have to get rid of everything. Rather, I can embrace the treasures in my life, choose to cherish the many gifts I have, and let go of what no longer serves me without guilt or remorse. Starting over can be joyful!

I can start over by changing the way I view my life and by deciding what is of real value to me right now. I am enjoying seeing my life with new eyes and refreshed vision. I’m healing and I’m starting over. © 2017 Karen Williams You can contact Karen Williams at karenwilliamscomic@gmail.com

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SF Sketch Randy Coleman Randy Coleman hails from New York, but has lived in San Francisco since 1975.

Coleman shares that before moving to the Bay Area, he studied Art History and Architecture at Boston University while working as a resident artist for architectural rendering at a Massachusetts historical society. “All of my life I’ve been an artist,” Coleman says. “To know me is to know that I have a passion for art and architecture. I love this project for the San Francisco Bay Times, and hope that you enjoy my sketches.”

SA N FRANCISCO BAY T I ME S MAY 4 , 2 0 1 7

© Randy Coleman, 2017

GLBT Fortnight in Review

By Ann Rostow

Let Them Eat Cakeshop Two weeks ago I was convinced that the High Court was on the verge of accepting a dangerous case, the infamous Masterpiece Cakeshop affair that pits an antigay baker against the gay friendly state of Colorado. Colorado has championed our right to be free of discrimination (tip o’ the hat to Romer v Evans!) but bigotty baker Jack Phillips has asked the Supremes to reverse his state court defeat.

Forgive me for returning to this nonstory yet again, but the case has been languishing in limbo for months, waiting, perhaps, for one more conservative justice to provide a fourth vote to accept review. April 21 was the first petition review conference for Justice Gorsuch, so I sort of expected Masterpiece to show up on next year’s docket. Instead, it was again delayed until the next conference, scheduled April 28. Hmmm. Somewhere I read that Justice Gorsuch had a limited role in this first meeting, so then I assumed that the critical issue (of whether religious freedom can trump gay civil rights) had been briefly set aside.

Then came the April 28 session, and still no Masterpiece! Keep in mind, the case has not been rejected. Indeed, it’s been in the hopper longer than any other petition under discussion and is now scheduled for the May 11 conference. Further, a few months back, the justices requested the lower court record on this matter, suggesting that the Court had more than a passing interest in this question.

So why not fish or cut bait? Is Gorsuch agonizing? Or perhaps, as I saw in a SCOTUSblog note, one or two justices are preparing written dissents for denial of review, a pleasant notion indeed.

Meanwhile, I just read that Gorsuch will be assigning his own law clerks to go over petitions to the Court.

It’s common practice to rely on a pool system, where clerks will evaluate petitions on behalf of most of the justices, but, over the years, several justices have chosen to evaluate the thousands of cases on their own,

a process that would allow a deeper analysis of the various issues and claims. Has Gorsuch asked his clerks to provide a lengthy, in-depth report on Masterpiece? What’s the hold up!?

I’m going to stop here because I’m a tad obsessed with this case, and could easily natter along for another 500 words. But before I go, I was delighted that the High Court saved the polar bears in Alaska by refusing to block government land protections.

And they also refused to review the constitutionality of California’s ban on conversion therapy; that’s the second or third time they have effectively upheld such laws. I could check, but we get the picture. And it’s a pretty one indeed.

Define This!

There’s much ado in the press about a new Tennessee measure that calls for state law to be interpreted using the “natural and ordinary meaning” of words. This statute, now pending a signature from GOP Governor Bill Haslam, purports to undermine marriage equality by reducing terms like “husband” and “mother” to their heterosexual or gender specific roots.

The only problem is that this is an unconstitutional gimmick. And, as the Attorney General pointed out the other day, there’s an existing state law on the books that mandates the use of a neutral interpretation of gender in statutory language. In other words, the new law violates current law. Plus, it’s just ridiculous. It’s like passing a law that says the term “marriage” in state law must conform to 20th Century legal definitions. Nice try, bozos.

But come on, journalists. Don’t act as if this is a disturbing attack on freedom and equal rights. Call it what it is: nonsense.

I’m more annoyed by a proposal in Alabama that allows faith-based organizations to discriminate against same-sex adoptive parents. That measure is also awaiting a signature from the governor, although it has been awhile. I guess it’s under “legal review.” Oh, as you probably know, it’s not the Love Governor anymore.

It’s his successor, Kay Ivey.

I suppose I enjoyed the downfall of smarmy Governor Bentley, but I had a hard time blocking repellent mental images whenever someone read aloud those tapes of him sharing fantasies with his paramour. Do you know what I’m talking about? There’s a lot of stuff on the airwaves, and the Internet will diminish you if you let yourself look or listen. Don’t do it.

I’m sure there are many other nasty state bills lurking in dank crevices, saturated with a fetid conservative runoff. But I’m limiting myself to the ones that jump out at me like spiders.

Queer as Some Folk The Los Angeles Times has decided to drop the use of “homosexual,” “openly gay,” and several other anachronisms, which is fine. I’ve never really liked “homosexual,” but it seems to fit in certain, um, clinical situations. After all, heterosexual is okay, and sometimes you use homosexual in a combined or contrasting sentence. But I’m happy to drop it. We have long been judged as sexual people first, regular people second. Heterosexuals, in turn, are judged as people first, sexual people second, and their word reflects that.

More interestingly, the newspaper decided that our letter-name should be LGBTQ , with the Q designating either “queer” or “questioning.” It’s not technically an acronym, of course, because it’s unpronounceable.

I’ve written for a wide range of publications, all of which used either GLBT or LGBT. So I got used to both, and tend to use GLBT for reasons that elude me at present. I dislike adding the “Q.” If “Q” is “questioning,” then I think the questioner should answer the question and then join his or her brothers and sisters in the GLBT melting pot. If “Q” is “queer,” then it’s not a category, it’s a separate term.

We don’t have letters for every variation on the GLBT theme. Queer is just another word that suits a subset of the GLBT. Oh, you say, but that subset doesn’t feel included in GLBT! Well, neither do other subsets, and we don’t add their names. I don’t like the

word “lesbian” personally. I’m sure it’s a generational thing; some internalized homophobia attached itself to the L-word in my head at some point.

But I still feel part of the GLBT community. I don’t demand inclusion of my own favorite nouns and adjectives, because the bottom line is that it has to stop somewhere.

What about non-gendered people? Or intersexed people? They are a part of our community but they don’t get letters. And, no, “queer” is not a catchall for everyone who falls through the cracks. It has its own meaning. I’m thinking we’ll come up with something better in a decade or two. We always do.

As for “openly gay,” with its implication that the bearer has made the courageous decision not to live a lie, I think it would still have merit when talking about someone who lives in a part of the world where coming out is indeed a heroic act. But for Americans, with some exceptions, if you’re over 25 and gay, you have less and less of an excuse for hiding in the closet to begin with. It’s not courageous to be out. It’s cowardly to be pretending to be straight.

I said “with some exceptions” and put an age limit in there, so don’t call me heartless.

Fair Game Speaking of being in or out, I read some criticism of reporters who speculated about whether Aaron Hernandez was gay and might have killed his buddy to keep the secret. The former Patriot hanged himself in his cell after these rumors began to circulate. After that, other reports suggested he had a male lover in prison.

Aaron Hernandez, like Mohammed Atta and the Orlando shooter, is not someone I would welcome with open arms into our diverse and happy-golucky community. But if he was gay, and if his hidden sexual orientation played a role in deciding to murder someone, then it’s certainly a legitimate topic for reporters. The criticism I read was not on the order of: “you shouldn’t spread unsubstantiated gossip.” It was more on the order

of: “his sexual orientation is irrelevant to the story.”

Leaving aside the morality of gossip, the man’s sexual orientation sounds pretty relevant. Since when is it automatically gratuitous or taboo to raise the subject of someone’s gay sexual orientation? It reminds me of the legal question of whether calling someone gay is grounds for a defamation suit. If someone called me a Canadian, which is false, could I sue for defamation? No. Should you be able to sue if someone calls you gay, but, in fact, you are straight? Years ago, maybe.

But now? I don’t think so.

Army Weak Our new prospective Secretary of the Army, Mark Green, is so homophobic that I can’t even be bothered to list his antigay credentials. He’s a ten on a one-to-ten scale. The Tennessee lawmaker is dreadful in every respect, and it’s particularly annoying that he has been nominated to replace Eric Fanning, who is gay. Can the Senate dump him?

In other news, a lesbian bishop has been condemned by the Methodist Judicial Council, which ruled that her civil marriage violates church law, given that she is thus exposed as a “self-avowed practicing homosexual.” Denver-based Karen Oliveto has to wait and see whether the Methodist nabobs will vote to oust her in a separate procedure.

And a mother in Washington State has won a family law dispute now that the state supreme court ruled that she should not be penalized for her sexual orientation in court ordered custody terms. A lower court had ruled that Rachel Black’s devoutly religious exhusband should have primary custody of their kids, and should also be in charge of the children’s religious education. Rachel was ordered to refrain from talking about her sexual orientation, or “lifestyle choices” as the court put it, and the lower court record was jam packed with antigay subtexts.

Also, I promised myself I wouldn’t dwell on Title VII law this week, but I should mention that one of the gay (continued on page 22)

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GGBA (continued from page 16)

NEWS (continued from page 5)

nity for San Francisco, and California, to showcase the power of our collective business communities because we are a city and state that embrace diversity and inclusion,” Ackerman said.

19 Senators Ask Trump Administration Why It Is Erasing LGBTQ People 19 Senators sent a letter to the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) to urge them to collect data on LGBTQ people. The draft copy of the National Survey of Older Americans Act Participants was changed to remove a simple question asking if survey participants identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual or heterosexual.

The survey is meant to find out who benefits from the Older Americans Act, which provides funding for elder care and support for caregivers. A draft copy of the Annual Program Performance Report for Centers for Independent Living survey was also released, and it removed a question about sexual orientation and the option to choose “transgender” on the question about gender. The survey is used to measure the effectiveness of services for people with disabilities. In both cases, the only changes made to each draft survey was to remove references to LGBTQ people. The only Republican Senator to sign the letter was Susan Collins. The other signatories include openly lesbian Senator Tammy Baldwin and possible 2020 presidential contender Kirsten Gillibrand, as well as leftwing firebrands Bernie Sanders, Elizabeth Warren and Al Franken. lgbtqnation.com

Gwen Kaplan, who is the owner of Ace Mailing, a thirdgeneration small business located in San Francisco’s Mission District, shared: “As a board member of the San Francisco Chamber of Commerce, a delegate to the San Francisco Council of District Merchants and the California Small Business Association, I can say unequivocally that the whole of the business community will join with the GGBA in welcoming these amazing LGBT business pioneers to San Francisco.”

Kaplan added, “When one of our businesses succeeds, we all succeed.”

More details regarding the WBA LGBT Economic Summit and Conference will be posted at ggba.com as soon as they become available.

MILLER (continued from page 18) menting your wishes can make difficult circumstances easier for everyone involved.

Tell loved ones where to f ind important documents. Families who are kept in the dark could face challenges if something unplanned happens and they are left to pick up the financial pieces. Prevent headaches that can slow down the settlement of your estate by providing instructions about where you’ve stored the safety deposit key, bank accounts, stock certificates and other pertinent items, including digital assets. Also, ensure that your family has the contact information for the professionals (e.g. lawyer, estate planner, tax or financial advisor) who are helping you prepare or manage your estate.

Work with a financial professional. If you experience conflict in your family discussions or want some help navigating difficult topics, consider working with a neutral third party, such as a financial advisor. A financial professional can help your family understand your collective financial picture and transition wealth from one generation to the next.

Ongoing dialogue about estate topics with family members could bring you closer together and pave the way for a smooth transfer of wealth, when the day comes.

Brandon Miller, CFP is a financial consultant at Brio Financial Group, A Private Wealth Advisory Practice of Ameriprise Financial Inc. in San Francisco, specializing in helping LGBT individuals and families plan and achieve their financial goals.

ROSTOW (continued from page 21) workplace discrimination cases out of the Second Circuit has just been appealed to the full bench of that appellate court. The U.S. Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit covers New York, Connecticut and Vermont, maybe. (Yes.) Note that a High Court victory on one of these Title VII cases would preempt our need for the Equality Act, which has just been reintroduced in Congress.

Trapped in the Bubble I have other news. Five lesbians were attacked coming out of a London pub (singing “I’m in the mood for dancing” before being set upon by a couple dozen thugs). Angela Merkel told Putin to intervene in the ongoing crackdown on gay men in Chechnya. The partner of the police officer who was killed in Paris last month gave a touching eulogy (promptly denounced by Jean Marie LePen). And the ACLU is suing a Catholic hospital in Sacramento that refused to perform a hysterectomy on a transgender man.

Meanwhile, the Trump train rumbles down the track, and I find myself more estranged from the Republican party than ever before, which disturbs me. But it’s not just their policies; it’s their sycophantic refusal to be appalled by Trump’s combination of childish incoherence and ignorance. They fall over themselves to interpret and translate his idiocy, all the while accusing us, the rest of the country, of nitpicking or trying to turn him into the elite intellectual that voters rejected. You know, I don’t think it’s particularly intellectual to recognize that the Civil War was fought over slavery. I don’t think it’s elite to point out his limited grasp of legislation. It’s not nitpicking to question his embrace of murderous dictators.

But now I read articles about how we’re all trapped in our bubbles and corners, and I feel as if I am part of the problem.

Yet that can’t be right. Seriously!

I did have a thought about Facebook. If I were Zuckerberg, I would add a feature that allows you to accept one or two stories a day from outside your bubble. Then I would entrust the editors to collect legitimate articles representing a range of views, and feed those through the app. I would definitely accept the challenge.

I’m at the point where I can’t even read David Brooks without becoming infuriated. That said, Brooks has an annoying habit of trying to simplify complicated social and cultural currents by forcing them into neat themes as if writing a college exam essay, so I have a non-polemical excuse for my irritation. arostow@aol.com 22

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Report: Nearly All Fifty States Are Failing Transgender,

Gender-Expansive and GenderNonconforming Youth A new report, “Safe Havens: Closing the Gap Between Recommended Practice and Reality for Transgender and Gender-Expansive Youth in Out-of-Home Care,” offers the first comprehensive analysis of the lack of explicit laws and policies in most states to protect transgender, gender expansive and gender non-conforming (TGNC) youth in the child welfare, juvenile justice, and runaway and homeless youth systems (“out-of-home care systems”). The report is co-authored

by Lambda Legal, Children’s Rights and the Center for the Study of Social Policy.

While in most places state law, policy and practice must catch up with professional standards and requirements of federal law, a growing number of providers are turning recommended practice into reality to the benefit of TGNC youth in their care. The report’s analysis offers reform recommendations from TGNC youth with positive experiences in care and tips from affirming service providers. lambdalegal.org Town Hall in SF Addresses California’s Role in Resistance to Trump Administration On Saturday, April 22, Senator Scott Wiener and Assemblymembers David Chiu and Phil Ting hosted a Town Hall at Mission High School to discuss California’s response to Donald Trump and the new Federal Administration. As the San Francisco

Delegation to Sacramento, the three members discussed issues they are working on across a wide range of topics including immigration, healthcare, housing, transportation, education and climate change.

At the Town Hall, the three members each provided opening remarks and then opened the floor to a Question and Answer session with those in attendance hosted by Melissa Caen of KPIX CBS 5. The Town Hall can be watched in its entirety at YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=okILDbYI_58 Alabama Passes Law Allowing Adoption Agencies to Discriminate Against Gays Alabama lawmakers gave final approval to a bill protecting faith-based adoption organizations that refuse to place children with gay parents, or other households, because of their religious beliefs. The legislation would prohibit the state from refusing to license faith-based adoption groups that refuse placements because of their religious beliefs. Proponents argued that the measure is needed to make sure adoption groups can operate without being forced to violate their religious beliefs. Critics, including the state’s only openly gay lawmaker, called it blatant discrimination. The Alabama House of Representatives voted 87–0 to go along with a Senate change to the bill. The legislation goes to Gov. Kay Ivey for her signature. The governor has not said whether or not she will sign it. lgbtqnation.com

SISTER DANA (continued from page 19) for LGBT elders citywide. Adelman spoke of the early days of mere grassroots support for LGBT aging seniors. “But we are finally a part of the larger community of America!” she exclaimed. She concluded, “The miracle of Openhouse is to have taken a dream of living and thriving together into old age—and making it real for all of us.”

SISTER DANA SEZ, “CINCO DE MAYO IS ALWAYS A FIESTA TO CELEBRATE, BUT HERE ARE SOME OTHER GREAT UPCOMING EVENTS!” PETCHITECTURE 2017 is a celebration of 30 years of PAWS (Pets Are Wonderful Support) in preserving the human-animal bond for our most vulnerable friends and neighbors. It’s hosted by SHANTI PROJECT on May 4, 6 pm at the Fairmont Hotel. Bring your pups or come pet-less for your chance to bid on this year’s one-of-a-kind pet habitats and other pet-friendly items. shanti.org This year’s EQUALITY AWARDS— presented as a fundraiser for EQUALITY CALIFORNIA (EQCA)—will honor California Attorney General Xavier Becerra, columnist and commentator proudly gay Jonathan Capehart, business leader Michael Dunn, and reality TV personality and author Jazz Jennings for their leadership, courage, and visibility on behalf of the LGBT community.

Lieutenant Governor Gavin Newsom will also join the program. This year’s cochairs, State Senator Scott Wiener, California Board of Equalization Member Fiona Ma, San Francisco Supervisor Jeff Sheehy and Equality California Boardmembers Andrea Casalett, and David Tsai will help us celebrate our heroes and allies. Saturday, May 6, 6–11 pm, Westin St. Francis, 335 Powell Street. eqca.org MAITRI is hosting BLISS 2017, the 30th anniversary celebration, on May 7, 5–8 pm at the Golden Gate Club, 135 Fisher Loop, San Francisco, presented by Sutter/CPMC and The Dorian Fund. Come prepared to celebrate and support Maitri as they commemorate this milestone and raise critical funding to meet their mission! For 30 years, they have helped those with HIV/ AIDS pass on with dignity. Until there is a cure for all, they will remain steadfast in this effort—and they so appreciate your help! maitrisf.org CASTRO STREET ARTSAVESLIVES STUDIO AND GALLERY, 518 Castro Street & 18th, is once again giving us a magnificent MAY ARTISTS RECEPTION at the gallery—open to one and all,

free food, drinks, and entertainment on May 12, 6–9 pm. Two of the featured performers have wowed us before: Scarlet Astrid and Kim Lembo, and others— who unfortunately are forced to go without sound and microphone because of the constantly complaining upstairs neighbors who apparently need to go to sleep at 8 pm in the Castro. WHAAAAAT?! I know— it’s the freakin’ Castro already! Anyway, some of the artists on display that night and all month of May include: Liam Peters, Vicki Kieban, James Windsor, Suzie Curtiss, Mark Gebhart, Thomas Hyman, Jay Davidson, Garaje Gooch (and who doesn’t love his amazing photography?!), Mark Arnold, Bob Burnside, Harry Leaf, Paul Arnold, Greg Conover, Brad Lublin, Donna De Matteo (I gave my last edition a great review for her incredible show), Michael Lownie (another of my returning faves), Lorraine Grassano, Jack Stelnicki, and Butch. There will also be art by THOMASINA DE MAIO, the owner and curator of ARTSAVESLIVES, who is throwing open her studio monthly for these fabulous receptions/parties. De Maio is proud to be representing remarkable window displays for the HARVEY MILK BIRTHDAY ANNIVERSARY commemoration—along with all the other Castro merchant/ organizations. sfartslave.com The play that spawned the huge cult comedy phenomenon comes to sordid life! Three generations of a dysfunctional small-town Texas family gather after their elderly matriarch dies during a tryst with her much younger, much married neighbor. Fireworks are set off and bizarre truths exposed as the town prepares for what could be an embarrassing funeral. Sooo gay!

Sordid Lives plays May 12–June 11 at NCTC, 25 Van Ness Avenue. nctcsf.org BOYS BITE BACK is an evening of powerful performance about navigating queer & trans masculinities, trouble, conformity & resistance—featuring Sean Dorsey Dance, The Singing Bois and Amir Rabiyah. Saturday 8 pm performance includes Gala Reception. Sean Dorsey Dance’s all-new dances offer a sneak peek of the company’s upcoming show BOYS IN TROUBLE (premieres in 2018). As the shadow of T-rmp’s rule falls over LGBTQ communities across the U.S., Sean Dorsey Dance bites back with full-throttle dance, luscious queer partnering, highly-physical theater, and storytelling that celebrate expansiveness and reject compulsory conformity. May 12 at 8 pm to May 13 at 10 pm, Z Space, 450 Florida Street. web.ovation-

tix.com/trs (See page 33 for more information about this event.)

DRAGATHON 2017 (SHEROES VS. VILLAINS) will help raise funds for the SAN FRANCISCO GAY MEN’S CHORUS’ FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE NETWORK (FAN). FAN provides grants to chorus members who are unable to meet performance mandatory expenses. Please help give these beautiful individuals this affirming and life-changing gift, to be a part of The Chorus! In addition to donating, the Grand Finale of this fundraising campaign culminates in a fierce RUPAUL’S DRAG RACE-styled event where fundraisers will battle it out to earn the title of Ms. Dragathon 2017. Join the Sheroes and Villains on Saturday, May 13, 6 pm to 10 pm at The Oasis, 298 11th Street (at Folsom Street). This incredible show will have appearances by Courtney Act from RuPaul’s Drag Race, the gorgeous stripper men of Baloney, and these amazing SFGMC divas (including last year’s winner, Ammy Thest)! This event is free, but you must be at least 21 years old. Your donation is tax-deductible, so give freely! classy.org/fundraiser/954254 SECOND ANNUAL SPOTLIGHT ON BROADWAY is a rousing Sing-Along Concert Fundraiser, so come with me to hear the SAN FRANCISCO LESBIAN/GAY FREEDOM BAND for the second annual fun-filled audience participation concert on May 20, 8 pm, at the beautiful Sir Francis Drake Hotel Empire Ballroom on Union Square. Take your shower-time singing skills to the next level as we belt out some of Broadway’s most beloved show tunes from throughout the decades! Artistic Director Pete Nowlen will lead the fun as the Band musically transports us to the bright lights of Broadway with tunes from classics such as My Fair Lady, West Side Story, Hairspray, Chorus Line, Shrek the Musical, Sound of Music, and more! Special guest artists Donna Sachet and Leanne Borghesi will emcee the evening and sing some of our favorite tunes, some of which with OUR help! Joining them will be popular vocalists Jesse Barrett and Frank Federico. Enjoy drinks at the no-host bar, tasty snacks, raffles, and a live auction to conduct the Band. (See page 31 for more info.) sflgfb.org Sister Dana sez, “May Day! May Day! SOS! Save Our Ship! We must demand that Repugnican and Blue Dog Democratic Congresspeople reject any tax plan that eliminates or weakens Social Security’s dedicated funding stream in order to cut taxes for T-rump and his wealthy friends!

Otherwise we will surely sink into the drink!”

Out & Equal Momentum 2017 Photos courtesy of Out & Equal

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY RINK

Standing ovations and toasts honoring Out & Equal Founder and CEO Selisse Berry set the tone for an evening of rousing applause and celebration on Wednesday, March 29, at the organization’s Momentum Gala 2017 held at the Westin St. Francis on Union Square.

Berry has announced plans to step down later this year, although she will continue as a special adviser to the organization. More celebrations of her many achievements are planned, including those at the Out & Equal Workplace Summit, October 9 - 12 in Philadelphia. Find out more: outandequal.org The Momentum Gala is a night dedicated to honoring and celebrating LGBT leadership held as part of an annual threeday event that welcomes LGBT executives to San Francisco, where they participate in a series of sessions addressing leadership, LGBT equality, advancement in the workplace and more key issues and topics.

In addition to toasts celebrating Berry, the 2017 Gala also featured appearances by award-winning humorist Kate Clinton, BRAVO TV’s Scott Nevins, activists characterized in the documentary When We Rise, and an incredible performance by the Grammy-winning Pointer Sisters, who brought the crowd to its feet culminating ovations and gyrations too!

Congratulations to the entire staff and volunteer team of Out & Equal on the success of the evening.

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Carnaval San Francisco 2017 Celebrates

Carnaval 2015 Royals: Queen Rosa Mohr and King R. Jefferson Joseph

By Roberto Hernandez

T

he 39th annual Carnaval San Francisco two-day Festival and Grand Parade will wind its way through San Francisco’s Mission District this Memorial Day weekend, May 27 and 28, bringing samba, salsa, soca and more to the area in celebration of all that is “El Corazón de San Pancho/The Heart of San Francisco”—diversity, inclusivity and love.

As California’s largest annual multi-cultural celebration, Carnaval San Francisco draws over 400,000 attendees each year.

Guests engage in an enormous two-day festival and grand parade that’s pulsating with dancing, drumming, live music, bril-

PHOTO SOURCE: MACROSANCHEZ.NET

“El Corazón de San Pacho—The Heart of San Francisco”

liant costumes, delicious food, and artistry from Brazil, Mexico, Bolivia, Colombia, Trinidad, Tobago, Puerto Rico, Cuba, Nicaragua, Panama, Peru, Guatemala, Africa, Chile, Haiti and more—mostly created by Mission District residents and Bay Area artists.

Cuban pianist, composer and arranger, Jesús “Chuchito” Valdés Cortés, Jr., will headline the two-day festival. On Sunday morning, seven-time Grammy-nominated percussionist, John Santos, and longtime Carnaval San Francisco supporter and dancer, Blanche Brown, will serve as grand marshals for the parade, leading it (continued on page 26)

Longtime Carnaval San Francisco supporter and dancer, Blanche Brown, and seven-time Grammy-nominated percussionist, John Santos, will serve as Grand Marshals for the 2017 San Francisco Carnaval Parade.

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CARNAVAL • SAN FRANCISCO • MAY 27–28, 2017

Photos courtesy of Carnaval San Francisco

HERNANDEZ (continued)

King R. Jefferson Joseph

He continued, “Whether I’ve chosen to blaze across the stage with intense warrior-like movement in royal blue pants and a regal sash, or skip about gleefully donning a feathered headdress and sporting gold/silver sequined booty shorts, I have felt accepted and celebrated for who I am.”

Other parade groups include Mexican Aztec performers, traditional African drummers, Polynesian dancers, Japanese drummers, giant puppets and folkloric groups representing Guatemala, Honduras and Bolivia. The Grand Parade will start at the corner of 24th and Bryant streets, proceed west to Mission Street, head north on Mission to 17th Street, turn east on 17th and conclude at South Van Ness.

Carnaval San Francisco was conceived 39 years ago by a group of local musicians, artists and residents eager to bring the spirit of Latin American and Caribbean culture to San Francisco, and has grown to become the largest annual multicultural celebration in California.

Carnaval San Francisco 2017 will take place a month before the city celebrates the 50th anniversary of its Summer of Love. In honor of that milestone, Carnaval San Francisco organizers plan to pay tribute to musical icons Carlos Santana and Jerry Garcia, both San Francisco natives synonymous with the 1960s counterculture movement.

The event is supported by Brava! For Women in the Arts and San Francisco Grants for the Arts. Admission to the festival Carnaval 2017 King Antoine and Queen Tiombe and parade is free. Grandstand seating for the parade, located on Mission Street between 21st and 22nd streets, is available for purchase online at www.carnavalsanfrancisco.org, where you will also find more information about Carnaval San Francisco, including current updates.

The Carnaval San Francisco Festival will be held Saturday and Sunday, May 27 and 28, from 10 am to 6 pm. Taking place on Harrison Street between 16th and 24th streets, the Festival will feature a rich assortment of food, music, dance, arts, crafts and other fun activities and entertainment on several stages for people of all ages to enjoy.

PHOTO BY PETER ANGRITT

PHOTO SOURCE: MACROSANCHEZ.NET

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Carnaval 2016

Trash Mash Up, Carnaval 2013

Carnaval 2011

PHOTO BY CARNAVAL.COM STUDIOS

Roberto Hernandez is the Executive Producer of Carnaval San Francisco.

The Grand Parade on Sunday, May 28, begins at 9:30 am with a brilliant procession of contingents, most of which will feature beautifully adorned floats depicting rich multicultural themes and featuring performers who engage and entertain the crowds. Brazil-

26

PHOTO SOURCE: MACROSANCHEZ.NET

ian-style escola samba schools with up to 300 members will dance through the streets in fantastic feathered headdresses or sweeping Bahia skirts, while Caribbean contingents will perform the music and dance of the Bahamas, Cuba, Jamaica, Puerto Rico and Trinidad.

“In 2015,” he added, “I won a title that has granted me entry into a royal family that includes several kings who are proud members of the LGBT community. I’ve paraded through the streets of the Mission with award-winning Grupo Tania Santiago, and danced about perched high up on the royal Carnaval float with my husband, Andrew Presley, proudly parading and dancing by my side. These experiences are just a few, and, of course, my own, but I hope, and truly believe, they represent the experiences of many others who belong to both the LGBT and Carnaval communities.”

Entertainer Benjamin Bratt, Carnaval 2010

King R. Jefferson Joseph (center) and his husband Andrew Presley with a member of their dance troupe Grupo Tania Santiago

PHOTO COURTESY OF CARNAVAL SF

“As a proud member of the LGBT and Carnaval communities, my experience at Carnaval has been that of celebrating life and the many members of our rich and diverse community,” said Carnaval San Francisco’s 2015 King, R. Jefferson Joseph. “It is a safe space that promotes joyful, artistic expressions of humanity. I’ve had the honor of being one of the symbols of this mission, and I have felt fully supported by the Carnaval community.”

PHOTO SOURCE: MACROSANCHEZ.NET

This year’s event theme, “El Corazón de San Pancho/The Heart of San Francisco,” pays homage to San Francisco’s enduring legacy as a place that has always opened its heart to people from around the world. Some of its residents are economic or political refugees who came to San Francisco to find sanctuary. Others, from the hippies of the 1960s to members of the LGBT community, came to the city looking for love, freedom or the right to express themselves. Event organizers believe that San Franciscans built a city that val- Queen Rosa Mohr and King R. Jefferson Joseph, who is an ues belonging, diversity, community-building, and multicul- out and proud LGBT community member, presided as the tural arts and that the “heart” of San Francisco is the value royals for Carnaval San Francisco 2015. its residents place on culture, community and empathy toward one another.

PHOTO SOURCE: MACROSANCHEZ.NET

alongside Carnaval San Francisco 2017 King and Queen Antoine Hunter and Tiombe Valone.

L INTER NATIONA IONS

CA RNAVAL CELEBR AT

Colombia

Mexico

Bolivia Brazil

HACHE PHOTO BY VALERY

Trump caricatures have appeared recently in Carnaval celebrations held in Düsseldorf, Germany; Tuscany, Italy; and Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.

PHOTO SOURCE : CAR NAVAL DE COLONI A

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Tips and Terminology Related to Wedding Room Blocks

Photos courtesy of The Claremont Club & Spa

By Alexis Garhammer When planning a wedding or another important event, you may have guests arrive from out of town for the occasion. If so, you or your planners should set up a room block as a courtesy for your guests. Before doing this, it helps to have a general understanding of some of the industry terms you might hear.

Contracted Room Block A contracted room block is an agreement made between you and the hotel in which the hotel provides a special rate and number of rooms over specific dates. You, the client, are financially responsible for meeting a revenue minimum from your guests’ room reservations. This is a good option if you know a large number your guests will be needing overnight accommodations.

Courtesy Block A hotel may offer a courtesy block in lieu of a contracted room block. Courtesy blocks provide a special rate for you and your guests, but do not guarantee a specific number of rooms. This is a good option if you won’t have many guests visiting from out of town and if you don’t want to be responsible for meeting a minimum number of rooms or revenue.

Attrition Applicable to contracted room blocks, attrition is the percentage a hotel will allow you to go below your contracted terms should you not meet the minimum revenue.

With these terms in mind, below are some factors to consider.

If you know you’ll need a lot of guest rooms for your out-of-town arrivals, consider what events are happening in the area before finalizing your wedding date, if at all possible. Hotel rates and availability will be greatly impacted by major concerts and conventions in town. For example, Claremont Club & Spa is located just steps from the UC Berkeley Campus, and we often sell out for events like graduation weekend and home football games.

Think about your guests’ needs when choosing a hotel or hotels.

Consider travel time to your wedding venue (if not getting married at the hotel), convenience to airports, on-property amenities (pools, spas, and restaurants are great things for your guests to have access to for down time), and proximity to local attractions.

Many guests will want to utilize the trip as an opportunity to see the destination, in addition to celebrating you.

Read the contract! It sounds silly, but it’s important to understand what you’re being held responsible for. Are you on the hook for 5 rooms on Friday and 10 rooms on Saturday? The last thing you or

the hotel wants is an unexpected cost days before your wedding. Thankfully, we have a dedicated sales manager who handles wedding and social room blocks, so he can walk you through this entire process and ensure you are comfortable with the contract before signing.

Once you’ve finalized the group room block, ensure your guests are utilizing it to make their reservations, versus them making individual reservations on the website of the hotel or via another hotel booking site. Your sales manager will provide you with a personalized link or group room block name that guests will need to use or reference when making their reservations. Your personalized wedding website, save-the-dates, and invitation cards are great ways to communicate this information. It’s also (continued on page 38)

Frederick Sullivan and Jaime Botello, who oversee the Weddings & Occasions page for the “San Francisco Bay Times,” are the talented wizards behind Sullivan-Botello Events (http://sullivanbotelloevents. com) and SnB Party Rentals (650-877-0840, www.snbpartyrentals.com). Both are Certified Wedding Planners with extensive experience in creating memorable, personalized events for special occasions. Their rental service is incredible, offering everything from beautiful gold Chiavari chairs to LED dance floors, and all at competitive prices. They are the creators of the Gay Vanity Wedding Show and are longstanding members of the Golden Gate Business Association, which is the nation’s first LGBT Chamber of Commerce.

Jed Davies and Merle Adams’ Inspirational Sixty Years Together

By Rink Foto People notice while walking almost daily by the Cove on Castro restaurant that there is a couple sitting side by side in the window at a table for four. In an era when most couples sit in facing seats and talk to other people on cell phones, or communicate by Skype while separated by a continent, these guys are close together, holding hands and kissing.

The couple in the Cove window is Jed Davies and Merle Adams, who are celebrating their 60th anniversary in July. Jed and Merle enjoy the friendly staff, the contemporary comfort food, and the ambiance of the Cove. Virtually every customer knows the partners, and they are greeted continuously.

Cove owners Solange and Maurice Darwish are on hand during busy weekends to welcome diners and to back up their servers, and they treasure the couple. Jed and Merle have been generous to some non-profit organizations as well as to the Cove staff throughout the 28

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years. They have dined there since 1972!

Jed and Earle met in Vancouver in 1957, and they moved to San Francisco shortly afterward to expand their social lives. They visited the Old Crow bar, which was frequented by sailors and the gay guys who appreciated them. Another favorite for them was the historic Black Cat bar. Yet another bar they discovered was too exciting, and though Jed and Merle are not monogamous—they have their limits.

Gays were considered criminals by the police during the decades before the modern LGBT liberation movement, and were harassed, attacked, and arrested. Gay people further suffered business losses, and were fired if they were publicly exposed. Newspapers ran photographs, names, and the arrested person’s job. LGBT social lives were therefore wrapped (continued on page 38)

Photos by Rink

A Quiet Passion Biopic of Poet Emily Dickinson Reveals How Taking Virtue Too Far Can Itself Become a Vice

Film Gary M. Kramer The handsomely mounted period piece, A Quiet Passion, opening May 5 in San Francisco, is gay filmmaker Terence Davies’s gorgeously-lit biopic of poet Emily Dickinson. The film chronicles Dickinson (Cynthia Nixon) returning home to Amherst where she tells her father (Keith Carradine) that she wants to write and publish poetry.

Davies, who penned the screenplay, concentrates on aspects of Dickinson’s character, from her efforts to write to her friendship with Vryling Buffam (a scene-stealing Catherine Bailey), to her arguments with her brother Austin (Duncan Duff) over his extramarital affair, and her prolonged illness.

palian and I’m Catholic.

She had a close family, and I come from a large family.

She was not recognized in her lifetime. I’m on the periphery of things, and not in the mainstream, which almost feels like being ignored.

On the phone from Boston, Davies spoke with me for the San Francisco Bay Times about beauty, truth, poetry, and the making of A Quiet Passion.

Terence Davies: It’s a mixture, really. You have to find the arc, and once you’ve done that, you place the poems, which act like music and tell you where they go. Sometimes the poems inspire the scene; sometimes the poem fits the scene.

Gary M. Kramer: What is it about Emily Dickinson that you identify with and that made you want to make this film?

Was it her rebellious nature?

Terence Davies: Apart from the poetry, which I love, I felt close to her spiritual course. She was spiritual without being religious. She believed in the soul, but not in God. I have that same crisis in my life. She was Episco-

Terence Davies

Gary M. Kramer: How did you choose which poems to include? Did you write the script and then fold in the poetry, or use the poems to create the story arc?

Gary M. Kramer: What accounts for the narrative approach you took to telling Dickinson’s life?

Terence Davies: If the inner life is rich, you don’t have to do things physically. It’s like writing a symphony versus a string quartet, which can be

equally powerful in intention and performance. The [Dickinson] house is like a chamber piece. The things that happen take on an enormous importance, and that’s where the richness and drama comes from. She was an ordinary woman who liked to garden, bake, and play the piano. But she’s a genius as well, which is what makes ordinary life difficult; [geniuses] can’t charter the waters of ordinary life.

Gary M. Kramer: Many of your films are set in the past.

What do you think is the contemporary relevance for a film like A Quiet Passion?

Terence Davies: Her poetry will be relevant all the time. That’s not something you can address in a film. (continued on page 38)

Poetry in Motion

Words Michele Karlsberg Michele Karlsberg: How important is accessibility of meaning? Should one have to work hard to “solve” the poem?

Has your idea of what poetry is changed since you began writing?

Check our EVENTS CALENDAR on

sfbaytimes.com

to find out about upcoming LGBT community events!

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Philip Robinson: Whenever I think of the access to meaning, it conjures up the mixture of words and their intentions. We know that words in and of themselves have an impact.

So, the written word has to be clear, comprehensible, and, at best, make a connection of the reader to the writer’s message. It is the perception that the person who reads these words will interpret, and hopefully understand what the writer was attempting to say. However, there are times when a reader might not completely understand what has been written. This could possibly be because of the particular subject matter. Clearly, not everyone will find personal significance or relevancy to everyone’s work. But, the work should be accessible and uphold some form of universality. Poetry is a storytelling concept that can

give people examples of things we all experience and/or have in common.

timately being real and down-right honest with myself and others.

Poems in and of themselves should be tangible and alive with purpose. They can capture the sounds and flavors of life, the actions we take to move beyond certain things, and be expressions of how we live life in its completeness or the search for fullness.

Poetry is a life written onto paper.

When we read it, something pours onto you the reader like, “Ah, I am happy to be introduced to you.” Poetry has power in its words, and creates within the reader a deep passion to want to read more.

Philip Robinson has been a writer-in-progress for about forty-six years, beginning with his college days. He finds complete happiness in writing, and, more importantly, sharing the written word with others. His latest book is “We Still Leave a Legacy” (We Still Leave a Legacy Press, 2017).

The written form of poetry over the years has changed for me. We each evolve and grow in life, and that process can be ref lective in what we write. Current social issues, emotional and physicality concepts are big now with me and other people as well. I write with a sense of promise of a better tomorrow. I write about the pain. I write to seek answers. In poetry, there is a sense of sadness. But, we also have to articulate a message of hope. Poetry has been a revolutionary call to action regarding social justice and social change. Today, when I think of my poetry, I am evoking justice through love, survival by way of confronting the ugly truths, and ul-

Mercedes Lewis: I feel that access to poetry is more important than accessibility of meaning. If the poetry is not available, there is no hope of understanding. Meaning is open to individual interpretation. Even when a reader empathizes with the poet, we cannot be certain that their understanding and interpretation is that which the poet was actually expressing or attempting to convey.

Poems can be simplistic, or very complex. Even within the complex structure, there should be some spark, some understanding of, or some affinity with the piece. If the reader does not get some “message” or visceral reaction, be it laughter, tears, a smile, anger, something, then perhaps that poem is not “for” that person.

My idea of what poetry is has not changed, however, my concept of (continued on page 38)

Spotlight on Broadway Two Divas, One Counter-Tenor and A House Full of Hams

PHOTO COURTESY OF DOUG LITWIN

East Side Stories Heidi Beeler

The Freedom Band’s Artistic Director, Pete Nowlen, wrote that this sing-along was inspired by The DanceAlong Nutcracker™, the Band’s beloved Christmas production. It’s another chance to get the audience into the act, which is at the heart of what this community band is all about.

“We wanted a parallel fun show to bookend with the Dance-Along with a more adult focus,” Nowlen wrote in an emailed interview, “and we want to build an annual benefit concert so that [the Freedom Band] can keep doing all that we now do—and even more. The two fit perfectly together, so this event was created … with the audience being a third featured performer.”

By now, we’ve all sung along to The Sound of Music, and, yes, here you get another great big opportunity to dust off your lederhosen and head for the alps. There’s more than Rodgers and Hammerstein’s lush symphonic soundtrack here, though. The coup of the evening’s program is a new medley from Miranda’s latest Broadway blockbuster Hamilton. Sondheim’s sublimely brooding Sweeney Todd, the funkadelic anthem “Freak Flag” from

Featured artists Leanne Borghesi and Donna Sachet performing in 2016

PHOTO COURTESY OF DOUG LITWIN

The San Francisco Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band is renting a ballroom, carting in a duo of delicious divas and revving up a song book of showtunes that covers more than a half century of Broadway gems so you can sing your heart out and live out your LinManuel Miranda fantasies in style.

Come drink the wine; come hear the band, indeed. Spotlight on Broadway features Donna Sachet and Leanne Borghesi under the crystal chandeliers of the Empire Ballroom at the Sir Francis Drake Hotel, Saturday, May 20, at 8 pm.

Shrek the Musical and Hamlisch’s brassy, driving A Chorus Line all make an appearance here. A whiff of Hairspray, a touch of Sweet Charity, a dash of Streisand “On A Clear Day” all make an evening of Broadway showtunes just that much gayer.

Framing the event with their golden pipes and comic repartee are two pros familiar with San Francisco’s cabaret scene. Donna Sachet hosts the weekly drag revue, Sunday’s a Drag, at Harry Denton’s Starlight Room at the Sir Francis Drake Hotel. Crowned Empress XXX by the Imperial Court of San Francisco, Sachet has performed at innumerable events and fundraisers over the past 20 years. Her annual variety show Songs of the Season has raised funds for the AIDS Emergency Fund for 18 years running. A San Francisco celebrity with national exposure, Donna has co-anchored live television coverage of the June SF Pride Parade for a decade.

Joining Sachet to co-emcee is Leanne Borghesi. Leanne performs cabaret in NYC, San Francisco and Los Angeles. A California native and graduate of the Pacific Conservatory of the Performing Arts, Borghesi most recently performed her solo show “BDSM (Beautiful, Dirty, Sexy Me)” at the Nikko last summer. Her alter ego is the infamous Ms. Anita Cocktail, and she’s an original founding member of the comedic cabaret trip “B.O.O.B.S.” (Busty Outrageous Over-the-top Broads Singing). She’s slung cabaret at Feinstein’s at the Nikko, Razz Room, Mbar Hollywood, Herbst Theater, Marines Memorial, Palace of Fine Arts, and the Metropolitan Room and The Duplex in New York City.

PHOTO COURTESY OF DOUG LITWIN

Audience members in 2016 moving to the Time Warp from The Rocky Horror Picture Show

PHOTO BY RINK

Life is a cabaret, they say, and if you’ve ever wanted to be the life of a cabaret, now’s your chance.

Artistic Director Pete Nowlen conducts the Band

“As we started building the event, Donna and Leanne were the two artists we identif ied as desired headliners,” said Nowlen. “We approached them both, hoping to get one of them—and both were extremely excited to perform and loved the idea of performing together. It’s amazing to be working with two fantastic artists.”

The two cabaret divas have lent Nowlen a hand in choosing the numbers. Along with lead i ng t he si ng-a long s, they’ll grace the audience with a few feature numbers of their own.

Of course, laying the music down for the singers, both featured and audience, is the San Francisco Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band, the first openly LGBT Band in the world.

Singing with the lavish sound of a 60-piece, symphonic band is a treat for cabaret pros and wannabes alike. Subtitled “A Sing-Along Concert Fundraiser,” the concert is a benefit for the Band complete with raffle prizes and auction items. A cash bar is on hand if you need a little singing courage.

“This show will be fun, even if you don’t want to sing-along,” Nowlen said. You’ll have a gay old time!

Trumpet player Heidi Beeler has been a member of the San Francisco Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band since 1991. She is also a founding member of the Dixieland Dykes +3. For more information, please visit www.sflg fb.org or www.facebook.com/sflg fb

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SF LGBT Community Center Ribbon Cutting & Open House Photos by Rink and Paul Margolis

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PHOTO BY PAUL MARGOLIS PHOTO BY PAUL MARGOLIS PHOTO BY PAUL MARGOLIS

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY PAUL MARGOLIS

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY PAUL MARGOLIS

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY PAUL MARGOLIS

PHOTO BY PAUL MARGOLIS

San Francisco Bay Times columnist Rafael Mandelman, chair of the SF LGBT Community Center’s Board of Directors, along with Hon. Mark Leno, one of The Center’s original founders, was on hand to congratulate Executive Director Rebecca Rolfe and the entire staff of The Center at the Ribbon Cutting and Open House held at on Sunday, April 9. The event celebrated The Center’s re-opening after the completion of an extensive renovation. Performers providing entertainment included the SF Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band, poet Marvin K White, the Aztec dance troupe Xitlalli, Banda Sin Nombre, Momma’s Boyz and the Lesbian and Gay Chorus of San Francisco. Supporters, friends and staff of The Center and its tenant organizations Aguilas and API Wellness Project were also on hand to enjoy the celebration.

BOYS BITE BACK: Sean Dorsey Dance As the shadow of the Trump administration’s rule falls over LGBTQ communities across the U.S., award-winning LGBT dance company Sean Dorsey Dance bites back with new full-throttle dance, luscious queer partnering, and highly-physical theater. In turns explosive, powerful, vulnerable and sexy, these new dances explore navigating queer and trans masculinities, trouble and resistance in contemporary America.

BOYS BITE BACK by Sean Dorsey Dance May 12–13, 2017 (Fri 8 pm/Sat 4 pm & 8 pm) Z Space, San Francisco Tickets: seandorseydance.com

Decidedly queer and deliciously subversive, BOYS BITE BACK takes a bite out of gender, macho posturing, standing up to bullies, trans peer pressure and being “butch enough.” Sean Dorsey is something of a trailblazer, being an openly transgender choreographer and dancer—in a field (Dance) where gender conformity is expected. All performances also feature two guest artists: retro quartet The Singing Bois and poet Amir Rabiyah.

BOYS BITE BACK comes to San Francisco for three shows only this May 12–13. It’s a rare treat for San Francisco audiences to get to see Sean Dorsey Dance, who tour extensively. These performances will also give audiences a sneak peek of Dorsey’s upcoming full-evening show BOYS IN TROUBLE, which will premiere in San Francisco in Spring 2018 before touring the U.S. “As an artist and an activist, I really needed to make new dances that respond to this enormously important moment in American history,” says Dorsey. “These new short dances respond with anger, with sass and cheek, with full hearts and with heavy hearts.

And humor. A lot of humor.”

The company’s multi-generational ensemble performs these new dances with guts and precision and deep humanity—moving seamlessly between full-throttle dancing, live speaking and intimate storytelling. The company has been awarded 4 Isadora Duncan Dance Awards and has toured to 26 U.S. and Canadian cities.

With gorgeous full-bodied dancing and exquisite storytelling, BOYS BITE BACK moves audiences to examine their own assumptions and experiences of gender and conformity. The two special guest artists featured at each performance enrich the production: The Singing Bois are a queer retro quartet that is part boy band, part Rat Pack; and Amir Rabiyah is an acclaimed queer, trans, mixed race poet-storyteller.

Dorsey says, “I invited The Singing Bois to perform because they are such trailblazers—and because I’m such a fan myself. They’re a brilliant all-queer, all-boi quartet that centers masculine-of-center, non-binary and people of color in their beautiful covers and original songs.”

He adds, “When I started choreographing and writing the text for these dances, I immediately thought of inviting Amir Rabiyah to share his poems. He’s that very rare phenomenon: a truly, deeply gifted poet of the highest caliber. His poems and storytelling transport and transform audiences.”

Sean Dorsey has earned international attention as the nation’s first acclaimed transgender contemporary dance choreographer. His dances have been called “exquisite … poignant and important”

(BalletTanz), “trailblazing” (San Francisco Chronicle) and “evocative, compelling, elegant” (LA Weekly).

Amir Rabiyah

BOYS BITE BACK is performed by Sean Dorsey, Brian Fisher, ArVejon Jones, Nol Simonse and Will Woodward. The show features original music composed by Alex Kelly, Ben Kessler and Grey Reverend. Saturday night’s 8 pm performance features a Gala reception after the show celebrating the company’s new work. Advance tickets are recommended, but tickets will also be available at the door.

“Navigating life under the horrific Trump administration has made our communities hungry,” explains Dorsey. “Hungry for

justice, hungry for opportunities to gather safely in community, and hungry to see our voices elevated and celebrated. BOYS BITE BACK offers audiences all of these things.”

Dorsey is known for creating dances that audiences can understand and relate to—something modern dance often misses the mark on. “Sometimes,” he says, “there are things that a spinning, jumping, sweaty body onstage can express in a way that nothing else can. These are very human, accessible dances that touch on something we all can relate to: feeling different, having longings for love and connection, and wanting liberation.”

The Singing Bois

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HIGHLIGHTS FROM THE DE YOUNG AND LEGION OF HONOR

Urs Fischer: The Public & The Private Through July 2 at the Legion of Honor Urs Fischer’s sculptures and paintings explore the tension between the material and the digital, object and image. Drawing on Western art history and popular culture, he continuously recalibrates the techniques and modalities underlying the creation and consumption of artworks.

In conjunction with the exhibition Auguste Rodin: The Centenary Installation, the Legion of Honor has invited Fischer to bring a contemporary perspective to our understanding and appreciation of the Museums’ permanent collection, specifically the acclaimed collection of Rodin sculptures.

PHOTO BY MATS NORDMAN

PHOTO BY DREW ALTIZER

Fischer has an innate ability to play with the mechanisms of perception to challenge people’s awareness of the physical and ideological contexts of their surroundings. Mining image traditions and artistic materials to introduce ideas of time and transience, his installations often have the character of an uncanny and fleeting illusion.

Installation view of “Urs Fischer: The Public & the Private” at the Legion of Honor. Image Courtesy of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco

With more than thirty works installed throughout the Court of Honor, rotunda and upper level galleries at the Legion of Honor, Fischer’s sprawling exhibition offers a unique opportunity to appreciate his inventive transformation of iconographic traditions in the context of a historic collection.

Urs Fischer, “boy in chair,” 2014. Cast bronze, 48 1/2 x 37 x 38 in. (123.2 x 94 x 96.5 cm). Courtesy of the artist and Gagosian Gallery. Image courtesy of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco

deyoungmuseum.org | @deyoungmuseum

Installation view of “Urs Fischer: The Public & the Private” at the Legion of Honor. Image Courtesy of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco

PHOTO BY DREW ALTIZER

Installation view of “Urs Fischer: The Public & the Private” at the Legion of Honor. Image Courtesy of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco

Installation view of “Urs Fischer: The Public & the Private” at the Legion of Honor. Image Courtesy of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco

Installation view of “Urs Fischer: The Public & the Private” at the Legion of Honor. Image Courtesy of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco

Survival of the New Generation (Editor’s Note: Teacher Jenn Bowman of San Francisco’s Mission High School is teaching LGBTQ Studies.

In this column, Bowman’s students share their thoughts about LGBTQ-

Student Voices Jenn Bowman, a history teacher at Mission High School, is a queer woman, activist, scholar, and queercore lover. With a small group of teachers, she took part in the initial LGBTQ Studies pilot class from 2010-11 in collaboration with the SF LGBTQ Center. This pilot, which offered a class for students on Saturdays at the Center, led to a 2010 school board resolution that promoted the expansion of LGBTQ Studies across high schools.

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related matters, including their concerns, what they have learned in class and more.)

Our LGBTQ+ class recently learned that UCSF plans to stop funding the New Generation Health Center, the only free, reproductive health center that primarily serves youth and young adults of color from the most underserved neighborhoods in San Francisco.

Sadly, we just learned that UCSF has told New Gen that they need to raise one million dollars by May 9 to keep the clinic open. Some students worked with our nurse to have a soup fundraiser, and more fundraisers are planned before the May 9 deadline.

However, our community does not have a lot of money; the fact that so many students in the Mission are lowincome is exactly the reason as to why this clinic needs to stay open. Please go to http://savenewgen.org/ to donate or find out what else you can do.

The following are several student voices expressing the importance of New Generation.

I support New Generation because we are the community it serves. It is a special place for everyone, especially young women of color. If New Generation is taken away, where can its patients go? New Generation offers same day appointments for birth control and STD screenings. We can’t

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PHOTO BY JENN BOWMAN

By Jenn Bowman

Mission High School nurse Mary-Michael Watts (left) with students Fiona and Maria, members of the school’s Women’s Rights Club, who sold soup to support the New Generation Health Clinic

lose a safe place for important members of our community. Yes, we are important! —Isabela, 10th grade We need to save New Generation because it is a strong, accepting community for the most underserved youth in our city. They have created a family, and taking that away would leave young people, including many Mission students, with no clinic or family.

—Fiona, 10th grade New Generation is a wonderful clinic that provides birth control, and it is completely confidential. It is where many people of color go. As a young woman of color, it frustrates me that I didn’t know that UCSF was going to take away the funding and close New Generation. If this happens, many people will go without services for re-

productive health and the check-ups they need. —Angelina 10th grade Mission High School: https://mhssfusd-ca.schoolloop.com/ LGBTQ Scholarship Opportunities: https://static1.squarespace.com/ static/52c7dc91e4b0c06fbd156f6b/ t/53b63fb8e4b079c1947dbd fa/1404452792563/LGBTQ.pdf

Paddle for Pride

By Kait Bailey

Picture yourself on the legendary Rogue River, where beautiful blue skies compliment the cold emerald water. The Rogue is one of eight original rivers indoctrinated into the Wild and Scenic Act of 1968. This unforgettable river will leave you rejuvenated.

We camp the first night on the beautiful Rogue River with wonderful sandy beaches and plenty to do. Upon arrival, you will see your tents set up and a tidy camp, thanks to your guides. All gear that you might need for camping—like tents, pads, sleeping bags, etc.—are provided. Your guides will provide a gourmet meal for you and will clean up afterward.

Camp is your time to relax, hang out by the river, go for a hike, read a book, or just simply take in all of the beauty and clean air. In the morning, your guides will make breakfast, clean up,

PHOTOS COURTESY OF ROGUE WILDERNESS

Raft companies on the Rogue River will provide all the gear that you might need for rafting, such as overnight and day dry bags, lifejackets, splash gear, and even an inflatable kayak for more excitement. An inf latable kayak or “duckie” is provided on this trip for those who may want to navigate their own craft through rapids. Most companies use 16-foot Sotar rafts down the river with “stern mounts,” where the guide is in the back asking for paddle strokes from the guests. There are more laid back options available that involve no paddling, just sightseeing and good company. If you are a photographer this is your ticket! Guests travel together in a pod, so you can enjoy casual splash fights, group swims, and great conversation.

Your trip starts at Grave Creek putin, where you will experience whitewater right away. Grave Creek rapids are rated class III and have big fun waves that will soak your stoke!

The Wild and Scenic section of the Rogue River is rated class II–IV, and is family friendly, while still gifting whitewater excitement. The Rogue offers breathtaking scenery, coniferous forests, waterfalls, and wild animals. The river’s rapids and deep canyons cut through old bedrock and earth’s ancient layers, leaving scene after breathtaking scene.

pack, and rig for the day of rafting.

Each day your guides will cater a riverside lunch, which varies from day to day and always supplies local food.

The second day offers unmatched beauty providing not only exciting whitewater, but also the most dramatic scenes, including Mule Creek Canyon, a high-walled narrow slot canyon unlike any other river experience in Southern Oregon. The famous Blossom Bar upholds its name while your guide masterfully navigates their way through her rocky bones. This is a rapid that you will never forget.

that we offer, and is great for those who have to work for the weekend.

trips like this one, which allows people to reconnect with the outdoors.

Don’t forget to book your Paddle for Pride Trip on July 7 for our 3 Day Camp Lodge Raft Trip. Let Morrisons Rogue Wilderness Adventures & Lodge take care of all your vacation needs. Come adventure with us on the Rogue River and explore her wonderful beauty. We offer many amazing

Come rediscover your soul! Call 1-800-336-1647 for more information or questions, or find us online at www.wildrogue.com Kait Bailey is a professional raft guide and is the Marketing Manager for Morrisons Rogue Wilderness Adventures.

Your last night on the trip is Paradise Lodge, where you will find all of the comforts of home away from home. Forget the bustle of civilization and come enjoy some quite time at Paradise Lodge, while still enjoying great amenities like gourmet dining, personal rooms with showers and comfortable beds, a full bar, and an amazing deck with acres of property.

The lodge and staff there are friendly and interesting people to chat with as well. The lodge has a volleyball court, horseshoe pit, Frisbee disc golf course, and hiking opportunities.

The only access to this lodge is either by helicopter, raft, jet boat, or hiking in! This is the most remote lodge in the canyon, given that there is no road to access it. The Rogue River will instead serve as the highway to get there.

On the last day, the guides gear up the boats and raft to the take-out. The shuttle is provided on all of our trips either with a Morrisons van, or we can shuttle your personal vehicle to the take-out so you can then drive to the coast and continue your vacation. We provide storage for your vehicle while you are away on the trip as well.

Our Wild and Scenic Rogue River trip allows for a detox from all digital devices and social media, providing for a relaxing, yet manageable, active adventure vacation. This is a wonderful trip

How to Be Your Own Personal Trainer 1: Nothing behind, everything in front 2: Don’t give a damn about what anyone else thinks

Easy Fitness Cinder Ernst This is the third article in the personal training series. The first two offered information to help you decide if personal training is right for you, and how to be successful at finding and working with a trainer. This article begins my favorite topic, helping you to be your own personal trainer.

As a matter of fact, I just wrote a book about it called Easy Fitness for the Reluctant Exerciser (easyfitnessbook.com).

You may already be wondering how this is even possible, you being easy and successful with exercise by yourself. Isn’t that the reason you’d want to hire a trainer, to be easy and successful with exercise so you can have the strength, stamina and mobility to live your life fully? (Remember, at Easy Fitness we always recommend not making fitness about weight loss or what you look like.) I understand your doubts, and we will sooth them.

There are two Easy Fitness keys to begin unlocking your capacity to be successful with exercise. They are:

The first is important for a few different reasons. You may be tempted to use the past to compare yourself to where you are now, and then beat yourself up. If you do that, you may give up before you even get started, or you might get started, but you will probably feel bad about yourself.

When you take action from a lousy feeling place, that action will not be sustainable. You might get it going for a little while, but it will be an uphill battle. Sooner or later, you’ll stop. This is a pretty common course.

There’s nothing wrong with you. It’s mostly how people approach fitness.

It’s why people tend to need a personal trainer.

The other reason this first key is important is that, on your Easy Fitness journey to becoming your own personal trainer, you will have ups and downs. You will have setbacks. The best way to navigate the path is from the “right now” stance: What’s true right now and what’s next. Those are the thoughts that will guide you. You cannot get to the “right now” if you are looking behind. What’s true and what’s next … right now? Nothing behind, everything in front.

“Don’t give a damn about what anyone else thinks” is important because using Easy Fitness to become your own personal trainer is not a mainstream practice or idea. You will be striking out on the road less traveled.

When you are on a road less trav-

eled, other people might unknowingly, or without meaning to, impede your progress. Most people are pretty much brainwashed by traditional f itness thinking. Easy Fitness is not based on traditional fitness guidelines.

Traditional f itness starts with a f lawed premise that there is something wrong with you, so you better exercise. Or that there will be something wrong with you if you don’t exercise, so you better exercise. When you begin with that f lawed premise, the journey is hard and requires motivation and accountability (personal training). We are doing something different with Easy Fitness, and we recommend that you give it a try and get some Easy Fitness traction before you share it with anyone.

The Easy Fitness premise is that where you are is just fine. It’s where you are and it’s your perfect starting place. All is well; we’ll take it from here. In the next article, we’ll give you another step in becoming your own personal trainer. In the meantime, relax. If there is an exercise or stretch that you like or enjoy, think of the Easy Fitness Keys and give it a try. If you want some exercise suggestions, find Cinder Ernst on YouTube or pick up the Easy Fitness for the Reluctant Exerciser book at http://easyfitnessbook.com

Cinder Ernst, Medical Exercise Specialist and Life Coach Extraordinaire, helps reluctant exercisers get moving with safe, effective and fun programs. Find out more at http:// cinderernst.com

Take Me Home with You! Camden

“My name is Camden. I am told I look very exotic with my light brown and white fur, plus my seductive eyes. I don’t have a mirror, so I don’t know if it is true or not. I do know that I’ve got a lot of love to give, and will greet you each night when you come home from work. After dinner, we can relax together with me on your lap as I serenade you with my soft purr.”

Camden is presented to San Francisco Bay Times readers by Dr. Jennifer Scarlett, the SF SPCA’s Co-President. Our thanks also go to Krista Maloney for helping to get the word out about lovable pets like Camden.

To meet Camden and other pets seeking their forever homes, please visit: San Francisco SPCA Mission Campus 250 Florida Street San Francisco, CA 94103 415-522-3500

Dr. Jennifer Scarlett and Pup

Aside from major holidays, the adoption center is open Mon–Fri: 1–6 pm and Sat–Sun: 10 am–5 pm. Free parking is available for those wishing to adopt! For more info, please visit sfspca.org/adopt S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES M AY 4, 2017

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Compiled by Blake Dillon

4 : Thursday Love or Confusion: Jimi Hendrix in 1967 @ Museum of the African Diaspora, 685 Mission Street. Composed of photographs of the artist in 1967 celebrating the 50th anniversary of the Summer of Love. Wednesday-Sunday. moadsf.org Proud Mamas Speak: Unconditional Love & Rethinking Gender @ Center for LGBTQ and Gender Studies in Religion, 1798 Scenic Avenue, Berkeley. Three moms will lead a discussion about motherhood, family values, faith and gender diversity.

7pm-9pm. clgs.org The Summer of Love Experience: Art, Fashion, and Rock & Roll @ deYoung Museum, 50 Hagiwara Tea Garden, Golden Gate Park. An exhibit of iconic rock posters, photos, interactive music and light shows, costumes and textiles, ephemera and avant-garde films celebrating the 50th anniversary of the summer of 1967. Repeats daily through August 20. deyoung.famsf.org Petchitecture 30th Anniversary @ The Fairmont San Francisco. Atop Nob Hill.

PAWS presents its annual benefit

reception and silent auction, where canine guests are also welcome.

6pm. shanty.org Dirty Rhythm @ El Rio, 3158 Mission Street. Trever Pearson (C&J) and Moe Moe (Pink Mammoth) present an evening of dance music.

9pm-12am. elriosf.com

5 : Friday Cinco De Mayo 17th Anniversary Party @ Destino Latin Bistro/Pisco Bar, 1815 Market Street. Enjoy great food and cocktails with host James Schenk celebrating the venue’s 17 years. 5pm12am. destinosf.com The Reunion - Cris Williamson, Teresa Trull and Barbara Higbie @ Occidental Center for the Arts, 3850 Murphy Ct, Occidental. Three women’s music legends combine for a reunion featuring classic songs and more. 7pm. occidentalcenterforthearts.org 3rd Annual AIDS/Lifecycle Fundraising Dinner: Supporting Team Meow Men @ Chez Poulet, 3359 Cesar Chavez Street. Join the Meow Men and Chef Brenden Darby to support the

team’s ride from SF to LA. 7pm10:30pm. 9eventos.com

6 : Saturday Cinco De Mayo Celebration @ 1142 Valencia Street. A familyfriendly celebration of Mexican and Latino foods, music, dance and artistry. 10am-6pm. mncsf.org

7 : Sunday Trans Family Potluck in the Park @ 666 Bellevue Avenue, Oakland. Our Family Coalition’s group will gather near the gazebo to enjoy a potluck picnic. 11am-3 pm. ourfamily.org

EQCA Equality Awards @ Westin St Francis, 335 Powell Street. The annual benefit of Equality California featuring emcee Scott Turner Schofield. 6pm-11pm. eqca.org

Rainbow Healers Brunch 2017 @ Destino & Pisco Bar, 1815 Market Street. For professionals, including psychotherapists, psychiatrists, physicians, lawyers, message therapists, acupuncturists and others, offering support services to the LGBT community. gaylesta.org

Play on the Bay Sunset Cruise with DJ Rockaway @ Berkeley Marina Boarding, 200 Marina Blvd., Berkeley. Cruise for women who love to dance on SF Bay. 6:45pm-10pm. djrockaway.com

Barbara Higbie with Cris Williamson and Teresa Trull @ Freight & Salvage, 2020 Addison St. Three women’s music icons present their Reunion Tour. 7pm. thefreight.org

Toshi Reagon and Big Lovely @ Freight & Salvage, 2020 Addison St. Berkeley. The renowned singer/ songwriter and her band bring retro fun, urban blues and folk to the popular East Bay venue. 8pm. thefreight.org

Wine women & Shoes Fashion + Compassion @ Ritz Carlton San Francisco, 600 Stockton Street. Benefit fashion show with wine tasting, delicious bites, raffle prizes, afternoon tea and shopping, supporting Saint Francis Foundation.

2-6pm. saintfrancisfoundation.org

Here I Am: Living Authentically @ FCC 1300 Polk Street. The Lesbian and Gay Chorus of San Francisco presents musical stories of love and identify and conductor Billy Sauerland’s final concert as head of the Chorus. 7:30pm and repeats May 7. lgcsf.org Meklit: CD Release Concert @ Rickshaw Shop, 155 Fell Street.

Introducing her first debut solo album, Meklit presents music with an Ethopian heritage and more from folk, to hip-hop to art rock. 9pm. rickshawstop.com

Maitri’s Bliss 30th Anniversary Celebration Gala & Auction @ Golden Gate Club at the Presidio, 135 Fisher Loop. The annual benefit for Maitri this year featuring comedian Marga Gomez, vocalist Lawrence Beamen and Lesbian/Gay Chorus of SF and more. 4pm-8pm. maitrisf.org

8 : Monday Cary Leibowitz: Museum Show @ Contemporary Jewish Museum, 736 Mission Street. The

first comprehensive career survey and solo exhibit devoted to contemporary artist Cary Leibowitz.

Contineus through June 25, 11am5pm, closed Wednesdays. cjm.org Tribute of Barack Obama lights up the library @SF Public Library, African American Center, 100 Larkin Street. A tribute to the 44th president of the U.S. with items from his early childhood into his years at the White House. Hours vary, open daily through June 1. sfpl.org Perfectly Queer presents a night of Manic D Press @ Dog Eared Books, 489 Castro St. Featuring Thea Hillman, Larry-bob Roberts, Alvin Orloff and Sparrow 13. 7pm. dogearedbooks.com

9 : Tuesday Chuck Forester Author Reading @ SF Public Library, 3rd Floor, Hormel Center, 100 Larkin St. The author reads from his new work Our Time: San Francisco in the ‘70s. 6pm-7:30pm. sfpl.org Todrick Hall presents Straight Outta Oz @ The UC Theatre, 2036 University Avenue, Berkeley. The American Idol finalist presents music from his third solo album based on the Wizard of Oz and presenting his semi-autobiographical account of his rise to fame. 8pm. theuctheatre.org

10 : Wednesday Castro Farmers’ Market @ Noe & Market Streets. On-going outdoor market in the Castro featuring fresh and organic foods from local vendors. 4pm-8pm, every Wednesday through Nov 16. pcfma.org Out with A.C.T. @ A.C.T.’s Geary Theater, 415 Geary Street.

Enjoy drinks, canapés and mingling with theatergoers and the cast of Battlefield at the LGBT After Party.

8pm. act-sf.org

11 : Thursday Senior Dog Rescue’s Love Rhymes with Everything Book Launch Party @ Umpqua Bank Potrero Hill, 415 De Haro Street.

Meet artist Dana Feagin and poet Kat von Cupcake who have created a fur-and-feather-friendly book.

6pm-8pm. muttville.org StartOut SF Demo Day @ Yelp, 140 New Montgomery Street.

Find out about the hottest startups in the LGBT community and network with top-tier investors, corporate strategists and press. 6:30pm8:30pm. startout.org

12 : Friday Older & Out @ North Berkeley Senior Center, 1901 Hearst Avenue, Berkeley. Group discussions on key topics such as dating, loss of friends, going back in the closet to survive, invisibility in the LGBT community, Alameda County services, dealing with exes and children, aging and loneliness. Repeats on Friday’s at 3:15pm. Info: anne@pacificcenter. org or 510-548-8283 ext 126.

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SA N FRANCISCO BAY T I ME S MAY 4 , 2 0 1 7

Zoe Lewis & Lisa Koch in Concert @ Freight & Salvage, 2020 Addison Street. Two icons of women’s comedy and music with guests Julie & Kate Wolf, Wes Carroll and Sarah Julian. 8pm. freightandsalvage.org Boys Bite Back with Sean Dorsey Dance @ Z Space, 450 Florida. A new work by an awardwinning dance company with special guests The Singing Bois and Amir Rabiyah. 8 pm and again on May 13 at 4pm & 8pm. seandorseydance May Artists Reception @ ArtSavesLives Gallery, 518 Castro Street & 18th. Food, drink and entertainment featuring Scarlet Astrid, Kim Lembo and others. 6pm9pm. sfartslave.com

13 : Saturday Tenderloin Museum Community Day @ 398 Eddy Street. A free day with tours and a diverse line-up of entertainment, including the first ever reading of the new play The Compton’s Cafeteria Riot. 10am-9pm. tenderloinmuseum.org Undetectable Plus+ @ SF LGBT Center, 1800 Market Street.

Workshops, discussions, exhibits, food and more about HIV, sponsored by ViiV Healthcare. 11am-2pm.

Reservations: 844-682-7234.

A Litany For Survival: The Life and Work of Audre Lorde @ SF Public Library, Latino/Hispanic Roms A&B, 100 Larkin St. The fourth in a series of film screenings focusing on Old Lesbians of Color sponsored by OLOC (Old Lesbians Organizing for Change). 2pm-5pm. sfpl.org

14 : Sunday AIDS Emergency Fund - Beer Bust @ Cinch Saloon, 1723 Polk Street. Support AEF by enjoying pints at the second oldest gay bar in SF. 3pm-7pm. cinchsf.com Today, Tomorrow & Forever: Tribute to Patsy Cline@ Freight & Salvage, 2020 Addison St., Berkeley Musical Two shows on Mother’s Day, featuring Margaret Belton, in a show combining humor, sadness and reality in a nostalgic look at the life of the star, including 27 of her greatest hits songs. 2pm & 10pm. thefreight.org

Everywhere Home: An Evening with Authors Fenton Johnson and Andrew Lam @ SF Public Library, 3rd Floor, Hormel Center, 100 Larkin St. Johnson’s new book includes a selection of essays including a section, “Journals of the Plague Years” set in the first years of the AIDS epidemic. 6pm-7:30pm. sfpl.org LGBTQ Senior Peer Counseling Training (Volunteer Opportunity) @ Peninsula Family Service, 24 Second Avenue, San Mateo. 9am-12noon through June 7. Info: ebloomfield@ peninsulafamilyservice.org or 650-403-4300 ext 4383

17 : Wednesday ShutterSpeed Exhibit @ Harvey Milk Photo Center, 50 Scott Street.

An international exhibit on the photography, art and athleticism of skateboarding. 5pm-8pm. Exhibit continues through May 31. harveymilkphotocenter.com SF International Day Against Homophobia & Transphobia @ Harvey Milk Plaza, 2401 Market Street. A community hosted by Gays Without Borders rally addressing social justice issues affecting LGBTQ people as part of an international observance now celebrated in more than 130 countries. 6pm-7pm. gayswithoutborders.wordpress.com

15 : Monday Final Day for LGBT Community Survey 2017 Participate in this annual survey and enter to win a drawing for a $50 gift certificate. http://survey.communitymarketinginc.com/se.ashx?s=359D3 42B6E874676&CMID=167 Taste of the City @ Bespoke, Westfield Centre, 5th & Market.

Project Open Hand’s signature benefit is an exciting culinary experience with food enthusiasts and philanthropists. 5:30pm. openhand.org

SPRING AT THE MARKET

SF Giants Until There’s a Cure Night @ AT&T Park, Willie Mays Plaza. Watch the Giants take on the division-rival Dodgers and a portion of your ticket benefits the Until There’s A Cure Foundation.

7:15pm. sfgiants.com

GGBA’s Mega Make Contact @ SF LGBT Community Center, 1800 Castro Street, 2nd Fl. Celebrating Small Business Week, this annual gathering is the largest LGBT business networking event in the US. 6-8 pm. ggba.com

PCFMA.ORG

1.800.949.FARM

fb.com/castrofarmersmarket

S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES M AY 4, 2017

DESIGN : LOGOMAN : logomantotherescue.com

16 : Tuesday

37

10th Annual DogFest Benefit for McKinley Elementary Photos by Rink DogFest is a great new San Francisco tradition that offers pet lovers in our community a chance to socialize and to show off their furry four leggers. Pets can compete for awards such as Best Costume, Best Tail, Best Coat, Best Mutt, Best Ears and more.

DogFest happens in the spring at Duboce Park as it did recently on Saturday, April 22, and now you can start making plans to participate next year. Find out more: mckinleyschool.org/dogfest/dog-show/

WEDDINGS (cont’d from page 28)

KRAMER (continued from page 30)

important for you and your guests to be mindful of the reservation cut-off date to ensure availability and rate guarantees.

This is how I saw her life in a subjective way. You hope people read her.

I’m a technophobe, so I don’t understand the world now. The more technology takes over, the more it seems like a denial of real life, which is why I feel more secure in the past.

Note: It’s important as well to know that every hotel handles room blocks differently. For example, not all hotels offer courtesy blocks, and attrition can vary from property to property.

Knowing the basics and what questions to ask will help you to find the right hotel for you and your guests.

Alexis Garhammer, CWP, is the Social Catering Manager at Claremont Club & Spa, A Fairmont Hotel.

Garhammer handles all weddings, fundraisers and social events at the iconic Oakland Hills property. A graduate of the University of Central Florida, she began her event career in Chicago where she gained experience planning a range of events from corporate dinners to galas.

She is now a Certified Wedding Professional specializing in weddings in the East Bay. RINK (continued from page 28) around evading the notice of law enforcement. That is why Jed and Merle chose to go on bike runs, since these events were held in isolated areas.

They were proud of Harvey Milk’s bravery when he rode in the 1978 Gay Parade (what it was called then). They were at City Hall to protest the 1979 Dan White trial verdict, and saw the “Gay Cancer” pictures in Star Pharmacy’s window in 1982.

In spite of the challenges, Jed and Earle stayed together, with their relationship remaining strong to this day.

There was a mayoral proclamation for the couple’s 50th anniversary from then Mayor Gavin Newsom. Then Assemblyman Mark Leno showed up at their celebration at the restaurant with a proclamation.

The secret to their decades together?

Caring for each other, love, and the patience to get through difficult times.

They do not see a marriage for themselves in the future, and their families have welcomed them as a couple for decades. As Gavin Newsom and Mark Leno stated on their proclamations, Jed and Merle are an inspiration and a treasured source of “we were there” information about the advances of gay rights.

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SA N FRANCISCO BAY T I ME S MAY 4 , 2 0 1 7

Gary M. Kramer: What observations do you have about Emily’s integrity and high standards?

Terence Davies: Emily had a high moral stance, and if anyone fell below it, she felt it was impossible to forgive them. She’s appalled at what Austin has done; you are not unfaithful to your wife. The problem with Emily is her standards are so high there were few who could maintain that standard. She reprimands herself twice because she’s aware of her own faults. She’s told, “Integrity taken too far can be taken as ruthless.” She never thought of that—that taking any virtue too far can become a kind of vice.

Emily is inflexible. But I wanted to make Ms Buffam fun. When you are entertained by someone, and they teach you something important, you never forget it because they entertained you.

Gary M. Kramer: The film is about the beauty of truth and the poetry of the known. Can you explain your interest in truth, beauty and realism?

Terence Davies: It depends on what truth you are looking for. Narrative truth is not the same as real truth. The search for the truth— dramatically or artistically—you try to say something as honestly as you can. In real life, truth makes enemies, and is not the best way forward. Being kind is better than being in the right. That’s a good template. We are all searching for a truth. For artistic truth, you set up an artificial life. They are lies, and you have to believe the lies. Any film has to be true, so those people who like it believe that aesthetic. But the people who don’t believe won’t— that’s the drawback.

Gary M. Kramer: Catherine Bailey steals the film as the witty and outspoken Vryling Buffam. What can you say about her character?

© 2017 Gary M. Kramer

Terence Davies: Vryling Buffam—with a name like that, she had to be fun. I didn’t want the film to be solemn. These were ordinary people, other than Emily, who is a genius. Buffam encourages rebellion.

Gary M. Kramer is the author of “Independent Queer Cinema: Reviews and Interviews,” and the coeditor of “Directory of World Cinema: Argentina.” Follow him on Twitter @garymkramer

KARLSBERG (continued from page 30) the work involved in writing poetry has changed drastically. Generally, poetry comes to me in complete form, and I must scramble to get it down before it is lost. That has not changed. However, I used to think that was the end of the process. The piece was finished, complete, perfect.

Recently, I have found that not to be the case. Sometimes it must be tweaked, rearranged, and sometimes even rewritten to ensure that it is understandable, that it flows as intended. I find that reading the piece aloud, several times, has helped me with that part of the process. Things

sound much different once they are in the universe than they may have in my head.

Mercedes Lewis, a member of the Golden Crown Literary Society Board of Directors, is the author of “Glimpses of a Fractured Soul” (Blue Beacon Books by Regal Crest, 2017). For more information: http://www.regalcrest.biz/author_page.php?author=Lewis_1 Michele Karlsberg Marketing and Management specializes in publicity for the LGBT community.

This year, Karlsberg celebrates twenty-eight years of successful book campaigns.

Speaking to Your Soul

Astrology Elisa Quinzi Our set way of being in the world is being challenged in a necessary manner. Our desired intentions manifest circumstantially to the degree that we slay our own personal dragons.

ARIES (March 21–April 19) Take a look at what gives you your sense of security in the world. Underlying fears might have you holding on to that which holds you back. It might be time to step outside your comfort zone.

LIBRA (September 23–October 22) You might experience the resurfacing of some pain related to your self-esteem. The good news is what arises is meant to be healed now. Be willing to share your process with another trusted soul.

TAURUS (April 20–May 20) If you find yourself emotionally triggered by someone close to you, take this as an invitation to search yourself for what fear is at the root of your trigger. This is an opportunity to heal and release an old wound.

SCORPIO (October 23–November 21) You have a chance to become aware of an emotional pattern that no longer serves you. As you do the work of letting go, you become more empowered than ever.

GEMINI (May 21–June 20) The ending of a cycle has you contemplating what’s next. You might let go of someone or some habit. Humbly and honestly look at the ways in which you have yet to grow and improve, and prepare yourself now.

CANCER ( June 21–July 22) Your personal contribution to society is somewhat contingent on the healing of an old wound. Expose your false beliefs about yourself so you can release them.

Your soul could use more joy and you deserve it.

LEO ( July 23–August 22) The ladder you are climbing has its feet in your family mythology. Be sure to weed your garden of limiting conditioning so you can yield a plentiful harvest.

VIRGO (August 23–September 22) You’re encouraged to engage more with the people around you. Fear might have you isolating, but your outlook on life can benefit from new input. Make an effort to be curious.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22–December 21) The veil between this world and the non-physical realms is very thin right now. Go within to call forth the higher guidance you need to help you go through what you’re experiencing.

CAPRICORN (December 22–January 19) Now is a good time to notice what has you feeling more joyful and more like yourself. As you do so, make any necessary course corrections toward your dreams.

AQUARIUS ( January 20–February 18) The ever-elusive balance between private life and public life is calling for your attention. Pay attention to the signs to address which side needs some regeneration.

PISCES (February 19–March 20) The world appears complicated and overwhelming. Sift through your own fears and open your mind to a new way of seeing that benefits you and the world.

Elisa has been enjoying the art of astrological counseling since earning professional certification many years ago. In addition to astrological knowledge, she brings a high degree of conscious presence to her work, and creates a safe, comfortable atmosphere for sessions to unfold organically. Contact her at futureselfnow@gmail.com or 818-530-3366 or visit www.ElisaQuinzi.com

As Heard on the Street . . . Harvey Milk Day is May 22.

What do you think was Milk’s greatest legacy?

Kimberly Alvarenga

I am a reflecton of Harvey Milk’s legacy. He worked to lift the voices of underrepresented communities.

He worked to make sure we have a seat at the table.

Lito Sandoval

Back in ACT UP days we looked to Harvey as a symbol of Queer resistence. To this day he holds the same significance - be out, be proud, and live and love openly.

Robin Abad

Harvey reminds us to fight with love.

Annie Van Buren

Harvey showed us it was not only okay to be yourself, but necessary!

compiled by Rink

Shaun Haines

The legacy of Harvey Milk was to always work on behalf of the people as a leader. Harvey taught us that when the world pushes us down, you win by always getting back up.

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