Shalom Tidings Dec14/Jan 15 by Shalom Tidings

Je Wh s u o Is s?

tidings Shalom

A Bi-Monthly Catholic Magazine

Life GOD HAS COME TO GIVE me

Before I formed you in the womb I knew you and before you were born I consecrated youâ&#x20AC;Ś Jeremiah 1:5

PRO-LIFE IS COOL Why is Surrogacy Wrong? JAN 15

Men, Church, Evangelization, and Loneliness

Dec2014 /Jan2015

$3.99 01

74470 80718

lessed Mother, pray for us that we may prepare our hearts for the birth of your Son. Help us to always see His face in the face of every person that we encounter, especially in the pre-born, poor, and elderly.

SHALOM WORLD CATHOLIC TV IS NOW AVAILABLE ON THE FOLLOWING DEVICES

HOW IT WORKS ON ROKU DEVICE 1

Plug in your device.

Connect to network.

Select SHALOM WORLD channel under Religion & Spirituality section and click install.

or WI-FI

ETHERNET

(Roku 3 only)

HOW IT WORKS ON AMAZON FIRE TV 1

Plug in your device.

Connect to network.

Select SHALOM WORLD channel under Life Style category and click install.

or WI-FI

ETHERNET

HOW IT WORKS ON SAMSUNG SMART TV 1

Plug in your Samsung Smart TV or Blu-Ray player (US only)

Connect to wi-fi or ethernet port.

On models 2012 and newer, search SHALOM WORLD under Life Style catergory in the app store.

or WI-FI

ETHERNET

Shalom World Catholic Channel is also available on Tablets across different platforms.

Shalom Media USA Inc , 211 East Wisconsin R oad, Edinburg, Texas 78539 | office: (215) 366-3031 | email: info@shalomwor ld.org

w w w.ShalomWor ld.org

EDITORIAL NOTE

THE MIRRORS IN OUR LIVES

ne day I realized that even in the midst of hurrying to go to church, I stopped in front of the mirror to ensure that my hair was arranged properly. Even though I was running late, I wanted be sure that I looked physically good. However, I gave no attention to how my soul looked. We usually see ourselves through the opinions of others, by comparing ourselves to the criteria placed by the world, or even in the inflated standards we place on ourselves. None of these, however, is a true reflection of who we are. The mirror of the soul is the Word of God. I recall a time when I was at an amusement park in Vienna, Austria. I noticed a small gathering of laughing individuals in one corner. Curiosity led me to them. Can you guess what caused their laughter? The group stood before a large convex mirror that distorted their figures. A thin man was now very wide. When I saw myself as a very stout and undersized person, I could not but help laughing as well! World philosophies and cultural perspectives act similarly to the convex mirror. But if we truly want to know what reality we are in, we need to look into the mirror that is the Word of God. Most people, however, are afraid to look into this latter mirror. Why? I know of a woman whose beautiful face become deformed in an accident. When she finally looked at herself in the mirror once again, she was horrified at what she saw and burst into tears. She hated mirrors thereafter. Likewise, there are many people who both hate and fear the spiritual mirror: the Word of God. They do not want to attend retreats or prayer groups. It is because these avenues may expose the real conditions of their lives, which are often filled with filth. These individuals do not want their deformed lives to be out in the open. So, they cover up their deformities with make-up, or expensive clothes, or fancy things, and they only inspect themselves before the mirrors which the world offers. We Christians are called to see ourselves in the Word of God. The apostle James tells us: “For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his own face in a mirror. He sees himself, then goes off and promptly forgets what he looked like” (James 1: 23-24). When we look in the mirror and find dirt on our cheeks, do we not wash our face? If a woman sees that her lipstick is smudged, does she not immediately correct the lip line ? If a man sees his hair sticking up, does he not smooth it ? Are these not the reasons why we look in the mirror, after all? Those of us who look in the Word of God, see our defects, and still do not remedy them—are we not fools? The mirror of the Word of God has a particular feature which is unlike any mirror of the world. It not only shows our filth, our mistakes, and deformities, but the Word of God has the power to cleanse us, to forgive us, and to make pure our soul. The Word of God is Life and it makes us whole. Saint John tells us: “You are already pruned because of the word that I spoke to you” (John 15:3). Therefore, we are called today to spend time before the mirror of the Lord, through His Word. And we are called to do this daily. His Word will transform us, strengthen us, and make us holy. Prayer I thank You, Lord, who gave the Word of God to purify my soul and to strengthen it. Increase in me the thirst for the Word of God. Let me be satisfied by receiving Your Word. Let the light of the Word of God brighten my life. Word of Jesus, transform me. Word of Jesus, heal me. Word of Jesus, strengthen me.

benny punnathara

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 3

Contents

Engage

5 Pro-Life Is Cool | christopher stefanick 6 Who Is Jesus? | father erik arnold 9 Women in the Church | krissy kirby 10 Christian Sportsmanship | brother john paul kern, o.p. 12 Salvation Lies in Remembrance | father thomas m. pastorius 16 Why is Surrogacy Wrong? | brother john dominic bouck, 18 20 24 26

Encounter

Proclaiming the Bad News to Teenagers | by bob rice Waiting for Gabriel | dr. timothy o’malley How Do I Go Deeper in Prayer? | father michael schmitz A Father's Blessing | lisa shefferly-gillay

PATRON, SHALOM MINISTRIES

H.E. Baselios Cardinal Cleemis Major Archbishop-Catholicos of the Syro-Malankara Catholic Church PATRONS

Bishop Mar Jacob Angadiath Syro-Malabar Diocese, Chicago Bishop Thomas Mar Eusebius, Syro-Malankara Exarchate, USA Spiritual Director

Father (Dr.) Roy Palatty, C.M.I. Editor-in-Chief

Chevalier Benny Punnathara Contributing Editor

Joe Philip SENIOR SUB-EDITOR

29 32 34

Enjoy

Mary Job

Ten Tips for a Better Confession | father ed broom o.m.v We Are the Pro-Life Generation | r.j. mcveigh Men, Church, Evangelization and Loneliness | adam janke

Editorial Council

Evangelize 38 5 Ways to Be Modern Day Maccabeans | kevin cotter 43 People Listen to Witnesses | father noel connolly 44 Book Review: | mark phillips 45 Media Scan 46 Upcoming Events

Joseph John, Jithin Joseph, Jinto Mathew, Santimon Jacob Design

Mustard Tree (www.mustardtree.in)

SHALOM TIDINGS December 2014/January 2015 (ISSN 2327-4549) is published every two months by Shalom Media USA Inc., 211 East Wisconsin Road, Edinburg, Texas 78539. Periodicals postage pending at Edinburg, Texas, and additional mailing offices. Shalom Media USA Inc. 211 East Wisconsin Road Edinburg, Texas 78539 Office: (215) 366-3031 E-mail: info@shalomworld.org Shalom Media Canada P.O. Box 3070 7700 Markham Road and 14th Avenue Markham, Ontario L3S 4T1 Office: (416) 913-8230 E-mail: infoca@shalomworld.org Shalom Media Europe Cathedral House Norfolk Street Sheffield S1 2JB United Kingdom Office: 114-2759-972 E-mail: europe@shalomworld.org Shalom Media Peruvannamuzhi P.O. Kozhikode Kerala, India 673528 Office: +91 496 266 4600 E-mail: info@shalomonline.net

Disclaimer Shalom Media USA Inc. considers its sources reliable and verifies as much data as possible. However, reporting inaccuracies can occur. Consequently readers using this information do so at their own risk. While every effort has been made to ensure that information is correct at the time of print, Shalom Media USA Inc. cannot be held responsible for the outcome of any action or decision based on the information contained in this publication/website. The publishers or authors do not give any warranty for the completeness or accuracy for this publication’s content, explanation or opinion. Although persons and ministries mentioned herein are believed to be reputable, neither Shalom Media USA Inc. nor any of its employees, sales agents or contributors accept any responsibility whatsoever for such persons and ministries’ activities. No part of this publication and/or website may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form without prior written permission from Shalom Media USA Inc. Permission is only deemed valid if approval is in writing. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to: Shalom Media USA Inc., 211 East Wisconsin Road, Edinburg, Texas 78539

4 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

Shalom Media Australia Inc. PO Box 134 NSW 2146 Sydney, Australia Shalom Media Rome Via Pelagio I No 10 - B/17 00165 Rome, Italy Office: +39 333 2849 843

PRO-LIFE

IS COOL By Christopher Stefanick

he ever-shifting parameters of “cool” drove hordes of teens to put grease in their hair in the 1950s, sleep outdoors for three days in the mud at Woodstock in the 1960s, wear bellbottoms in the 1970s, and popularize disturbingly neon clothing in the 1980s. Much like the wind, “cool” is hard to pin down, but its effects on youth culture are hard to miss. In many ways, coolness was not a big help to adolescent development in the 1980s and 1990s. As a member of “generation Jeff Spicoli,” drinking, messing around with girls, and skating by in school with a C- would have all been socially acceptable for me. Thanks to an early conversion to the Catholic faith, I was not a casualty of cool. In high school I wore baggy pants, had long hair, and had a rosary dangling visibly from my pocket. I could rip on the electric guitar and knew every John Michael Talbot song written. I was not the norm. The fact that I was deeply religious and regarded as cool by my peers was an anomaly. And as a teenager I stood out like a sore thumb at pro-life demonstrations. Such demonstrations did not fit within the parameters of cool for teenagers in the early 1990s. It was not that I was surrounded by octogenarians at pro-life events, it was just that other teens were hard to find. And the media did its best to ignore us in order to perpetuate the notion that being pro-abortion was cooler than being pro-life. I specifically remember one march in New York City that was tens of thousands strong. I was marching next to a saintly, elderly woman. She was alone, struggling to walk in the cold, rosary in hand. She pressed on, keeping the world turning with her prayers. A reporter brushed past me and the 30- and 40-somethings around me, held her camera high above the woman’s head and got her shot—a woman hunched over, gray hair, praying her rosary—the portrait of a pro-life movement without youth, a movement destined to pass with our grandparent’s generation. I remember thinking, “Didn’t you see the young man walking next to your camera?” She did, of course. She chose to ignore me. The boundaries of cool are shifting in the abortion debate, and

it is becoming harder for the world to ignore. Approximately 40,000 people were drawn to the San Francisco Walk for Life this past January. The Walk stretched well over a mile through the heart of the city. Live Action leaders estimate that sixty percent of the crowd was younger than thirty years old, with many thousands of high school youth present. According to one participant, Charbel Semaan, “You couldn’t overlook the huge number of youth. They were everywhere. And the pro-choice protestors have been shrinking yearly. They just don’t have much to say. One group of protestors was simply dancing around with a few signs.” (That does not sound very cool, does it?) Another group of protestors tried to infiltrate the pro-life crowd carrying banners and chanting, “A fetus is not a baby! Women are not incubators!” The young pro-life crowd decided to drown them out by praying a Chaplet of Divine Mercy. The pro-abortion protestors left the scene, frustrated and obviously outnumbered. The Washington D.C. March for Life was attended by nearly 400,000. Walking through the crowd it was clear that the prolife movement is young. The pro-life office of the Archdiocese of Washington organizes a pre-march rally for high school youths. They have to turn away countless groups because the Verizon Center, among the largest arenas in D.C., can only fit 20,000 people! In the oft-fragile psyche of teenagers, large numbers help define what is and what is not cool. The growing number of vocal, pro-life teenagers is bringing that movement to a tipping point. It is already deemed “normal” for a teen to be pro-life, and with each passing March for Life, it is clear that pro-life is getting ever cooler. Given the power of the cool factor in youth culture, this should make the pro-abortion movement very nervous. (www.RealLifeCatholic.com) is a sought-after speaker to Catholic audiences worldwide. He has authored or co-authored several books, including “Do I have to Go?,” “Raising Pure Teens” and “Absolute Relativism.” He is founder and president of Real Life Catholic, a non-profit organization dedicated to reengaging a generation. Stefanick and his wife are parents to six children.

CHRISTOPHER STEFANICK

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 5

WHO IS J By Father Erik Arnold

Why Did God Make Us? All of us have felt the deep longing in our heart to love and be loved, the desire to go deeper than material things and money can take us. This longing comes from God—He put the desire within us and offered us a relationship with Himself that would satisfy our heart's longing. To add even more joy, the Lord placed us in a human family in order to free us from feeling alone and solitary, a place where we could give and receive the Lord's love with one another. Why Is The World The Way It Is? So that we could love, God gave us the gift of freedom. (If we had been programmed or forced to love then it would not really be love after all). With our free will we chose to disobey God rather than love Him. This is what the Bible calls sin. Sin is the free choice to separate ourselves from God, when we decide what is right and wrong rather than following God's plan for our happiness and joy. Sin brings selfishness, pride, hatred, arrogance, lust, greed and, worst of all, death. These things make us deeply sad in our hearts and keep us from experiencing God's life within us. This is the world we now live in. Cut off from God by sin, man is destined to the eternal sadness of separation from the One who made him. No matter how hard we try, there is no way that we can return to God by ourselves. Is All Hope Gone? The good news is that God has not abandoned us, even though we chose to walk away from Him. God's love for us remains. God loves us so much that He sent His only Son to become one of us and to save the human race. This is Jesus, the Son of God, who shared our human nature so that we might share in God's divine life again. God Comes To Save Us It was our disobedience that brought sin into the world and with it the punishment of eternal death. Jesus did two things that we could not—from within our human nature He offered an obedient “yes” to the Father that no man could offer and, in saying yes to the Father, He accepted the punishment for our sins. Filled with love for us, Jesus was willing to suffer and die for us and by His death enable us to escape from our sins and to live with God forever. 6 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

S JESUS? The Cross The sacrifice Jesus made for us was offered on the cross. The full weight of our sins was placed on Jesus, who suffered a violent, excruciating death, revealing the awful nature of our sins. Jesus offered His life for us on the cross. Proof that the Father accepted Jesus' sacrifice for our sins is that He was raised from the dead on the third day. The resurrection of Jesus from the dead is also His great victory over death. Death entered the world through sin and disobedience; Jesus, free from sin, brought life into the world by His obedience to the Father's will. Is It All Taken Care Of For Me? We mentioned earlier that God gave us free will so that we could love. Even after the suffering, death and resurrection of Jesus, we are still left with a choice to make. God respects our freedom to choose. God gave us free will and if we choose a life apart from Him, He will allow us to do so, even in eternity. Once again we are left with a choice to make. What will we choose? As much as we try to deny it, our attempts to find happiness in the things of the world really only leave us empty and looking for something more. Worse still, we can become bitter, frustrated and filled with despair as we desperately continue our search. Will we choose this type of life, of sin and separation from God, of bitterness, frustration and despair? Or will we choose to become what we were made to be? Will we choose to accept God's love, to receive His forgiveness and healing and to live as He made us to live, which leads to real, true happiness? If we choose God, then we must become a follower of Christ, a Christian. To do this, we must repent of our sins, believe in Christ and be baptized. When you open your heart to God in this way, He enters your life and fills you with His Holy Spirit. Jesus knows that we cannot follow Him by ourselves, He knows that we are weak and that we falter. So Jesus gave us the Church, which He founded, to offer us the strength, guidance, care and teaching that we need. The Scriptures make it clear that belonging to Jesus also means belonging to His Church. The Church is our family, filled with brothers and sisters who struggle just as we do, but strive to love one another as He commanded. Even while

God gave us free will and if we choose a life apart from Him, He will allow us to do so, even in eternity.

He was here on earth, Jesus chose a leader for His Church: the apostle Peter. Peter was the first of the apostles to confess his faith in Jesus as the Messiah. He made Peter the rock on which He built His Church, and for two thousand years the Church has been led by the popes, the successors of Peter. They lead the Church relying not on their own strength or wisdom, but on Jesus' promise that not even the gates of hell would destroy His Church and that the Holy Spirit would guide us all into all truth. While there are many different churches today, the Catholic Church alone can truly claim to be the Church founded by Jesus because only the Catholic Church has preserved all of the gifts He gave to her: the fullness of the scriptures, the life of the sacraments, the full teaching authority of the apostles handed on through the bishops. It is through these gifts that God continues to provide for our needs, guiding us closer to Himself each day. What Do I Do Next? Once you have resolved to accept God's gift through Jesus Christ, then you need to work on building your relationship with Jesus and His Church. Building your relationship with Jesus happens when you spend time trying to get to know Him better each day. To do this, you really need to spend time reading from the Bible, the Sacred Scriptures. The Bible reveals the great love God has for us, teaches us how to make good choices that lead us closer to Him and allows us to get to know Jesus as He is. So spend time in prayer each day, reading from your Bible and sharing with Him all that is in your heart. The best prayer is honest prayer that comes from the heart. To build your relationship with Jesus' Church, start by making a choice to attend Mass each Sunday. God wants us to be part of His family and we keep the Sabbath holy by worshipping Him as Jesus taught us at the Last Supper: "Do this in memory of me." If you are not Catholic, then take the steps necessary to join Jesus' Church. If you have been Catholic before, all you need to do is to go to confession. If you have not yet become Catholic, most parishes have a regular program that will help you become part of the Church. Please call the parish and speak to the pastor for more information and with any questions you may have.

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 7

FIRST FRIDAY FIRST FRIDAY OF EVERY MONTH

8 pm to 8 pm 12 am to (EST) 12 am w w w . S h a l o m W o r l d . (EST) o rg

OF EVERY MONTH

w w w. S h a l o m Wo r l d. o rg

A TRINITARIAN NIGHT OF MIRACLES A TRINITARIAN NIGHT OF MIRACLES You may email your intentions to: prayer@shalomworld.org You may email your intentions to: or call our office at: prayer@shalomworld.org (215) 3031 at: or call366 our-office or mail us-at: (215) 366 3031 Night Vigil, or mail us at: 211 East Wisconsin Road, Edinburg, 78539 Night Vigil,TX211 East Wisconsin Road, Edinburg, TX 78539

WOMEN IN THE CHURCH By Krissy Kirby

ave you ever wondered about women and their place in the Catholic Church? I have. When I was little, I wanted to be the Pope (before I decided my dream was to become President, of course). Only then did I discover that since I was a girl, I could not become the Pope. That infuriated me as a small child, and sparked my interest in learning more about my life’s vocation as a woman of faith. Only as I have grown older have I begun to learn how I can actively participate in my faith traditions, as a layperson and as a woman. Women have a role in our faith. We are witnesses and called to be exemplary versions of ourselves. We are called by Christ to function in our Church using our own gifts, talents, and love. The example of women leaders in our Church shines through to us in the lives of many female saints and other women in our Church who used their femininity to do God’s will. We read about Mary Magdalene, Martha, and Mary who were friends and followers of Jesus and who were with Him throughout His ministry on earth. Later in the 14th century we see Saint Catherine of Siena, who helped bring the papacy back to Rome. Saint Clare of Assisi founded the female religious order similar to Franciscans. Saint Therese of Lisieux is a Doctor of the Church, thanks to Saint Pope John Paul II. These women and countless others have made their mark on the Church in critical and defining ways, allowing other women to look up to them and see how to live out God’s love through actions and service. In “Mulieris Dignitatem,” a 1988 apostolic letter by Saint Pope John Paul II, he says, “Holy women are the incarnation of the feminine ideal.” This tells us to follow the example of the holy women in our Church, who taught us all a great deal about the special place women hold. The New Evangelization needs women to be examples of true womanhood. What is a true example of womanhood? Who do we look to for guidance? Well, Mary, the Mother of God is a perfect place to begin. In the Blessed Mother, we see a sinless woman, courageous and steadfast in her faith, who said the ultimate “Yes” to God at a young age. In the face of adversity and rejection, she showed how strong her faith was by bearing the Son of God and then delivering her child in a stable. No simple feat! Throughout Jesus’ life, she was with Him, both in person and in prayer. When He was lost and teaching in the temple, she worried like any mother would about her son, then pondered these things in her heart; at the Wedding of Cana, she knew when He needed a nudge to begin His ministry; at the foot of the cross, she wept for the life and humanity of her son. As a woman and a mother, we see

Zvonimir Atletic / Shutterstock.com

Mary’s grace and strive to imitate her desire to do the will of God, unwavering in faith and holiness. As true, confident, feminine examples of love and generosity, we need to know and understand Church teachings and desire to do more as laity in our Catholic faith. As individuals we are a part of the Body of Christ, with an important responsibility to love and with incredible opportunities at the end of our fingertips. “Mulieris Dignitatem” encourages us—women of faith—to deepen our own understanding about ourselves, and be a witness of faith. We must recognize that our vocation is to understand and teach the faith, to evangelize the world, to desire to grow ever more deeply in Christ’s love, to care for the poor and destitute, and even to answer the call to religious life. But, the most important of these things is to love unconditionally. As Blessed Teresa of Calcutta said, “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.” In our faith today, we sometimes see people questioning where and how women should participate in our faith and its traditions. This is an issue that many on both sides of the spectrum feel strongly about. The New Evangelization is a way for all people who are members of the Body of Christ—especially women—to reconnect with God and to rekindle the desire to live our lives to their fullest potential.

CatholicApostolateCenter.org).

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 9

CHRISTIAN SPORTSMANSHIP By Brother John Paul Kern, O.P.

ports shape our lives from our earliest years. It started with games in the backyard with our siblings and neighbors, and during recess with classmates. Along with encouraging us to study hard and learn a musical instrument, our parents signed us up for sports teams. We made friends on our teams. We were taught how to be a good sport, a gracious winner, and to cheer for others. We also learned teamwork, hard work, “It’s not over until it’s over,” and, most famously, “It’s not if you win or lose, but how you play the game that matters.” This saying contains wisdom in a more manageable package for children than the more spiritually worded equivalents, such as “abandonment to divine providence.” But the message that faithful effort is more important than “success,” as measured by other standards, is similar. If sports analogies are good enough for Saint Paul, who, inspired by the Holy Spirit, urged early Christians to run the race of the Christian life so to win the prize of eternal life (1 Corinthians 9:24), then they must be suitable vehicles for conveying spiritual wisdom for people of all ages. As I reflect on how many commonly used phrases come from sports, the numerous movies based on sports, and the extent to which the annual calendar of sporting events influences us, I am sometimes tempted, despite my great love for sports, to see the cultural impact of sports as a rival force to the faith, one that seems to beg the label of idolatry. Think of all the sporting events–the World Series, March Madness, college bowl games, the Super Bowl, the World Cup, and a wide variety of playoffs, plus the Olympics every four years–which tend to shape our topics of conversation, our schedules, our celebrations, and our social lives. From the number of homilies that have asked me to consider what would happen if everyone were as pumped up about going to church as they were about the Super Bowl, I know that I am not alone. The news provides us glimpses of the casualties of obsession in the sports world and its scandals, and we have all experienced the ugliness of those who must win at all costs. Despite this, certain people, who speak of the “evil” of the competitive nature of athletic competition – with a visceral aversion that reminds me of Communists condemning the “destructive evil” of any competition in the market – are tossing out the baby of the good with the bathwater of excess. Iron sharpens iron. Like Christians in all ages we must build upon and draw out the good that already exists in our surrounding culture, so that the paths to God, which are present in what is common, may be recognized and embraced. Since we are surrounded by sports, how do we engage

with sports in a way that leads us closer to God? After all, the prize we are after is not the Stanley Cup, the Lombardi Trophy, or a gold medal. We are talking about the beatific vision, the enjoyment of God for all eternity in heaven. How can sports help us attain this? Recognizing the temptations present in sports, Saint John Paul II delivered this challenge: “In our time, organized sport sometimes seems conditioned by the logic of profit, of the spectacular, of doping, exasperated rivalry… It is also your task to proclaim and to witness to the humanizing power of the Gospel with regard to the practice of sport, which if lived in accordance with the Christian outlook, becomes a “generative principle” of profound human relations and encourages the building of a more serene and supportive world (address to the Italian Sports Centre, June 26, 2004).” Indeed, while certain sports rivalries may leave us skeptical about the promise of sports as encouraging “a more serene world,” sports can bring people together. In addition to the obvious unity built among teammates, even athletes of rival nations have developed respect for one another on the sports field, and this will hopefully help avoid conflict on the battlefield and elsewhere. Saint John Paul II also points out that, beyond providing a context for improving human relations and helpful analogies for explaining the spiritual life, sports can be a real school of virtue. “While playing sports, Christians also find help in developing the cardinal virtues – fortitude, temperance, prudence and justice.” These virtues are necessary for our growth in holiness. Virtues are formed by repeated acts, and sports – like work – provide an opportunity to repeat good acts that build virtue. Finally, by cooperating with God’s grace in practicing the infused theological virtue of charity, we can overcome the temptations toward vanity present in sports. Like those who, when recognized for their athletic success, rightly publicly praise God for their gifts, we can give glory to God through sports. May God help us to grow together, to build virtue, and to give Him glory in our sports, so that like Eric Liddell in “Chariots of Fire” we may say, “When I run, I feel His pleasure.” BROTHER JOHN PAUL KERN, O.P. is a Dominican Friar in the Province of

St. Joseph, currently studying at the Dominican House of Studies in Washington, D.C. His background as a Division I athlete at Penn State University, where he was an All-American and member of the 2004 Men's Gymnastics NCAA Championship team, gives him personal experience in relating athletics to the Christian life. Reprinted with permission from Dominicana (www.dominicanablog.com).

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 11

Salvation Lies in Remembrance By Father Thomas M. Pastorius

have always had a special bond with my grandmother, my mother’s mother. She was the only grandparent I ever got to know because my other grandparents all died before my birth or shortly thereafter. My grandmother had always impressed me as a very strong person. I know that when she was young she was forced to go to work as a child during the great depression, and as a young adult she had to place her father into a mental institution then became the guardian of her four siblings. My grandmother was a very loving person. She took her obligation as the only grandparent seriously and made every attempt to spoil us. It was always a real treat when we could spend the night at her house. One of my favorite memories regarding her harkens back to the days when I was in grade school. On days when we only had to go to school for a half a day I would walk over to grandma’s house to spend the afternoon. She would give me money to run to the ice-

12 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

cream store and I would go and bring back to ice-cream cones. We would then race to see which one of us could eat the fastest. Grandma moved in with our family when I was a sophomore in high school. My parents added a room on for her and, despite the fact that her presence made it nine people living under one roof, nobody minded. In fact, you could often find all of us back in grandma’s room, lying on her bed watching television with her. Toward the end of her life it became hard for me to watch her grow old. She walked with a cane and began to suffer from memory problems and anxiety attacks. She refused to go out in public because she did not want people staring at her and because she was also becoming intimidated by new spaces. This was made all the worse because of her memory problems as almost every place was a new place for her. As a result of the aging process this once independent woman became an almost prisoner in her own home. In

addition, she had developed more of a temper. Now my grandmother always had a temper, but toward the end it seemed that almost anything could trigger it. In all of this, though, I have grown in amazement at the way my mother cared for her. In a day and age when old people are being placed in nursing homes and forgotten about, and society at large is debating whether or not to start euthanizing people like my grandmother, my mother never raised her voice at her. My mother took the abuse that my grandmother gave her and she continued to give my grandmother the best care she could. I once had the opportunity to ask my mother where it was that she had found the strength to take care of my grandmother and her answer amazed me. She simply told me that she would never be able to repay my grandmother for all the love grandma had given her and she gave me a particular example. She said that when she was pregnant with my sisters, who are twins, she was told that she would have to be on complete bed rest if she was to give birth to two healthy babies. My mother told me she was frantic, for how was she going to care for the four children she already had, me being the oldest at the age of eight, if she was confined to bed? She knew my father was going to be of absolutely no help; in fact, he was most likely going to be a bigger problem than us four boys. This is when my grandmother stepped in to help. For nine months my grandmother came over early in the morning to take care of us; she stayed late into the night making sure we were fed and the housework was done. My mother is convinced to this day that if it were not for my grandmother’s unselfish service that my sisters would not be here today. My mother told me that every time she thinks about giving up or screaming at my grandmother she simply remembers all the selfless acts of love that grandma did for her. The story of my mother and my grandmother was for me a clear example of the profound teaching that I had once heard, “Salvation lies in remembrance.” My mother, despite her own personal weaknesses and struggles, found the strength to care for my grandmother by remembering the love my grandmother demonstrated for her. The key to this insight is that my mother chose to remember. My mother could have walked away from my grandmother and not had anything more to do with her. Instead she chose to remember, and because she remembered she obligated herself to a life of service—a life of returning the love she had received. We choose to obligate ourselves to a life of service each and every time we come to celebrate the Eucharist, when we come to fulfill the Lord’s command, “Do this in remembrance of Me.” Nowhere is this more evident in our Catholic liturgies than on Holy Thursday night where we remember how our Lord humbled Himself to come among us as a servant king and how He demonstrated this by washing the feet of His disciples, commanding them to regard themselves as servants to the lowly. At almost every point of the Mass God’s Word is jumping out in signs, gestures, words and songs, urging us to remember how He loved us and thus commit ourselves to a life of service to our brothers and sisters. At the beginning of each Mass we call upon the name of the Lord, for throughout salvation history when people make or renew their covenant with God, they call on His holy name in order to invite Him to act in their lives and to express their firm commitment

to live in covenant with Him. We mark ourselves with the sign of the cross drawing from the images in the Book of Revelation as being marked with a seal on our foreheads. The sign that sets us apart as God’s people and protects us from divine judgment. We remind ourselves of our sacred mission when we remind ourselves that the Lord is with us every time we announce, “Lord be with you,” and “And also with your spirit.” From a biblical perspective these words represent a divine summons, an invitation to a daunting undertaking. Throughout sacred scripture, when God calls someone to an important role He gives assurance that He will be present to provide that person with the strength necessary to fulfill that role. We have only to look at Moses, Joshua and Mary to see the power of those words. Throughout the Old Testament and the New Testament people cried out to God to have mercy on them and we are no different. At the beginning of the Mass we cry out, “Lord Have Mercy” three times, for it forces us to remember that our God has forgiven our sins and demands us to forgive those who sin against us. We sing the songs of the angels at Mass, the Gloria, to enable us to remember that our God loves us so much that He sent His only Son. We sing the song inspired by the angels at Mass to remember that our service should be done with the joy of Christmas. The Liturgy of the Word invites us to remember in a particular way all that God has done for us in salvation history. The stories of the Bible come alive to us in a way that shows us how God is working in our lives today and of our obligation to service that comes from remembering God’s actions in the history of the world. We profess our faith by praying the creed. We do so in order to better understand our identity as the Church of God as the Body of Christ on earth. The prayers of the faithful help us to remember that our God did not stop loving us 2,000 years ago but rather keeps on loving us today. He is the loving Father, Jesus taught us that He was, and He truly does care about our needs and us. As we enter the second part of the Mass we are drawn deeper into the mystery of God. At the heart of the Eucharistic prayer is the retelling of the last supper. A chance for us to participate in not only the Last Supper but also in our Lord’s sacrifice on Good Friday. Perhaps, though, the most telling sign of the commitment we make—when we choose to remember how Christ has died, Christ is risen and that Christ will come again—is contained in the word Mass itself. This word Mass comes from the Latin word Missio. It is the same Latin word that gives us the word mission in English. Once we have fulfilled the Lord’s command to do this in remembrance of Him and when we have received Him in the Eucharist we are sent forth to bring Christ to those we meet. We do this all as we call to mind the words of Saint John’s Gospel, “Do you realize what I have done for you? You call me 'teacher' and 'master,' and rightly so, for indeed I am. If I, therefore, the master and teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash one another’s feet. I have given you a model to follow, so that as I have done for you, you should also do.” © Father Thomas M. Pastorius was ordained a priest in May 2013 for the Archdiocese of St. Louis. He currently serves as pastor of Epiphany of Our Lord Parish (www.EpiphanySTL.org) in Missouri.

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 13

Ministry Spotlight: Immaculate Heart Radio Stephanie Foley

n November 17, 2014, Immaculate Heart Radio (IHR) brought English-speaking Catholic radio back to Los Angeles, California, with the launch of their newest station KHJ 930 AM. During the launch, Los Angeles Archbishop Jose Gomez ‘flipped the switch’ to make this new station live. IHR will reach nearly 15 million people in the greater Los Angeles area—providing Catholic programming 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. A network of 31 station and translators that broadcast in California, Arizona, Nevada, New Mexico, Hawaii, and Utah, Immaculate Heart Radio reaches more than 35 million people. The addition of KHJ in Los Angeles will bring that total to 50 million! Archbishop Gomez expressed his support of the station, saying, “We are excited to welcome Immaculate Heart Radio to Los Angeles

and recognize the important role that radio can play in strengthening the faith and identity of our people; by making families and parishes stronger and sharing the Gospel with those who have left the Church or given up on God.” Dick Jenkins, General Manager of Immaculate Heart Radio, said of the new station, “We’re really excited about entering the Los Angeles market, which is the number-two radio market in the country. We’re modifying our programs and hiring the new staff to be able to better meet the high standards and expectations of one of the primary communication centers in America.” For more information about Immaculate Heart Radio or to listen online, visit www.IHRadio.com.

Call for writers Shalom Tidings seeks to bring the hope found in Christ through His Church to the world. Fostering a kerygmatic and charismatic spirit, our mission is to share personal stories, practical teaching, and faith-filled reflections on how people of all ages are responding to the call to conversion and holiness that not only leads to their joy but bears fruit in the world through the power of the Holy Spirit.

ENGAGE: provide insight on issues that impact culture through a Catholic worldview which is faithful to the Magisterium of the Church, pastoral in its approach and speaks to a popular audience.

ENCOUNTER: show how Christ has revealed Himself through experiences that give hope and inspire others to seek Him, whether they are new to the journey or they walk daily with Christ.

ENJOY: celebrate the joy, challenges, and victories of living as a disciple in all stages of Christian life.

EVANGELIZE: inspire others through stories of men and women of all ages on mission as they use their talents to respond to the call to take the Gospel out into the world.

We welcome articles by writers who are with the Church and for the Church. Articles should be between 700 and 900 words. Author bios should also be included. Please note that the Editorial Council reserves the right to edit all submissions. For more information and to submit articles, please e-mail tidings@shalomworld.org.

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 15

WHY IS SURROGACY

WRONG? By Brother John Dominic Bouck, O.P.

ost people’s answer to this question would simply be, “In most cases, it’s not.” The typical modern American reaction to a woman bearing either a child conceived by means of in vitro fertilization (IVF) from two other parents or to receiving the sperm of the father and bearing a child related to her for another couple suggests that this is all “common sense.” The argument probably would go like this: “As long as the surrogate mother is willing and compensated for her pregnancy, and the parents are fit for childrearing and have a compelling reason to enlist a surrogate, then I guess not only do I not see the problem—I am edified by this service to help another family.” This common position would be bolstered by countless photographs and stories of the children conceived in surrogacy. Presumably just like “test-tube babies,” many will turn out to be fine citizens, happy, healthy and kind. So, what could be the problem? Surrogacy has been in the headlines recently, including a frontpage leading story about two Portuguese men who came to the United States to have a child through surrogacy. Although the article seems to favor the practice, it does acknowledge some drawbacks, especially abortion. It turns out that if either party gets cold feet, abortion or abandonment seems to present the easiest way out of the deal. You may have even read of the recent controversies regarding surrogacy in Thailand. If you grant me that there are stories that support the down side of surrogacy, but also other cases that seemingly show more uplifting endings, I would like to present the case for the Catholic Church’s understanding. Namely, that the child must be conceived in a union of his or her mother and father without a third party and without methods that separate the marital act from the conception of a child (see “Catechism of the Catholic Church” 2376-2377). Catholic teaching offers at least three reasons why surrogacy is not morally feasible, even with otherwise good results. Catholic teaching always affirms that you may not do something that is immoral for the sake of a good end. In our culture, we often look only at the consequences, though our vision is so limited that we cannot possibly see them all, nor are we always good at arranging their importance. ◗ Commodification of the Mother Of course there are cases where a woman becomes a surrogate purely to help a couple that could not otherwise conceive and bring to term a healthy child. Conversely, there are many cases where a woman needs money and enters into surrogacy for monetary reasons. However, even if a woman is willing to carry the burden, the act of bearing another couple’s child denies the importance of the gestational process of

a mother bonding with her child in the womb. It removes the loving act of intercourse from the creation of new life and forces a parting of the child—who grows “under her heart,” as Kristin Lavransdatter says in Sigrid Undset’s classic novel—from the birth mother for the rest of their lives. It would be even more complicated if, like the kind of surrogacy arrangement that ended so disastrously between Hagar and Sarah (Genesis 16:1–16; 21:9–21), the two mothers have some on-going connection to one another. ◗ Commodification of the Child For the child, we can see two basic outcomes as well. There are cases of abandoned or aborted children for a variety of reasons, and there are cases of healthy, thriving children. In both cases, it seems that the most common source of surrogacy is IVF. This method is not approved by Catholic moral teaching for the reason mentioned above—in IVF the act of conception is removed from the marital act. Moreover, it makes the child a commodity because the successful embryo is usually selected from a group of embryos on account of certain attractive characteristics that it has; the remaining embryos are either discarded, frozen or used in research. As a former embryo, that is challenging to think about. Nowadays, toward the goal of ranking the best embryos and eliminating the poor and the lame, steps are taken by both fertility clinics and paying customers. No matter the good intentions of those who engage in surrogacy, the process itself industrializes human reproduction. There is a slippery slope argument that could be made but in this case the action has already gone too far. The artificial production of a child is an extreme form of consumerism that should not be taken lightly. Nevertheless, it should go without saying that, despite the moral problems with surrogacy, children conceived through IVF are endowed by God with the dignity of all human persons and they should be treated as such. ◗ There is No “Right to a Child” Even though infertility is unimaginably difficult for affected couples, no one is owed the life of another person. The desire to have a child is one of the most basic and beautiful realities there are. But a child is a gift and nature does not like to be coerced. It is surprising that in this age of returning to nature, especially in the area of food and animals, the general public does not seem to be concerned with the synthetic ways that human beings treat their own bodies and the bodies of their children. The trials faced by infertile couples are certainly no small thing. However, the moral teaching of the Church offers guidance precisely for those in such difficult situations, not to legislate, but to let truth shine. These couples should be assisted through means that respect their dignity and the dignity of any future children.

BROTHER JOHN DOMINIC BOUCK, O.P. entered the Order of Preachers in 2012. He

studied at the University of St. Thomas in Minnesota and the Angelicum in Rome. Reprinted with permission from Dominicana (www.dominicanablog.com).

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 17

PROCLAIMING the

BAD NEWS To teenagers By Bob Rice

ertainly all of us who work with young people know that we are called to proclaim the “good news,” but what about the bad news? Three years ago, a survey of American Christians showed that only 32 percent of Christians believe in hell. Though these surveys were directed toward Christian adults of all denominations, it is fair to assume that Catholic teenagers would respond in a similar way. In 2007, Pope Benedict XVI spoke to a suburban parish outside of Rome and said, “Jesus came to tell us every one is wanted in paradise, and that hell, about which little gets said today, exists and is eternal for those who shut their hearts to His love.” Talking about hell can pose a challenge for those who work with young people. Inevitable questions are raised: ◗ Who does the Church think is in hell? ◗ Does the Church think that all of those who are not Catholic are burning in eternal flames? ◗ If God loves everybody, then how can anybody be in hell? The difficult answers to these questions often discourage catechists from speaking to youth about this topic. If young people do not understand the horrors of hell, they can never appreciate in the same way what Christ went through to bring them to heaven. To put it another way, the good news is not really good unless the bad news is really bad. Question 1 So who does the Church think is in hell? In his book “Crossing the Threshold of Hope” Saint John Paul II wrote, “the Church has never made any pronouncements in this regard” (p 186). That is not to say that the Church does not believe that people are in hell, it is just that the Church has not mentioned specific people who are in hell. She canonizes saints but does not create a list of sinners. The Church is not about discovering who is in hell. The Church is about those who are in heaven. We do not know the names of individual people in hell, and there is a good chance they do not know their own names either. That is one of the horrors of hell. The “Catechism of the Catholic Church” (1025) tells us that those who live in heaven, “retain, or rather find, their true identity, their own name.” In contrast, souls in hell are anonymous. This is a good teaching point for young people who are tempted with the anonymity that the Internet

provides to do things they would never do if their name were attached to it. Question 2 Does the Church think everyone who is not Catholic goes to hell? No. The “Catechism” tells us, “Every man who is ignorant of the Gospel of Christ and of His Church but seeks the truth and does the will of God in accordance with his understanding of it can be saved. It may be supposed that such persons would have desired baptism explicitly if they had known its necessity” (1260). But that does not give everyone a “free pass.” We all have a responsibility to seek the truth and do the will of God. The revelation of Jesus Christ given through the Church is certain; to live a life without that revelation is uncertain. “Can be saved” does not mean “will be saved.” This is why we must continue to preach the good news to all people. All are saved only through the cross of Jesus Christ, whether we knew Him in this life or not. Question 3 This leads us to the most common question: “If God is so loving, why does hell exist?” The answer is that hell exists because of God’s love. God does not force Himself upon us; He gives us a choice to follow Him or not. Hell is “the state of definitive self-exclusion from communion with God” (“Crossing the Threshold of Hope,” p 183). You will have to help young people get beyond the silly stereotypes of hell—fire, brimstone, pitchforks or the idea that hell is a “party.” God is the source of love, peace and happiness; hell is the exclusion of all those things. Hell is scary. But we do not talk about hell to frighten teens into holiness. We do it because it helps us appreciate all that Christ did to save us from it. Saint John Paul II commented that many times, “preachers, catechists and teachers no longer have the courage to preach the threat of hell.” May we who work with young people have the courage to proclaim the “bad news,” so that they more deeply understand the beauty of the Good News. BOB RICE (www.bob-rice.com) is an Assistant Professor of Catechetics at Franciscan University of Steubenville in Ohio. He ministers to over ten thousand people yearly through speaking, writing, teaching, and music. He and his wife are parents to seven children. Originally published in “The Sower” Vol 34.2 by Maryvale Institute of Birmingham, U.K. (www. maryvale.ac.uk).

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 19

Waiting For Gabriel By Dr. Timothy O’Malley

“D

o you have children?” For most 30-somethings, this seemingly harmless question is the opening volley of a round of socially acceptable chit-chat. Colleagues around the office fill silences with a discussion of recent pregnancies, first communions and the athletic milestones of their children’s lives. At the salon or barbershop, the shearing of hair is accompanied by regaling the barber with mundane details of one’s progeny. “Sally is six, just lost her first tooth and has begun to wonder about the origins of daisies.” College reunions become an occasion not simply to reminisce about chemistry class or the bizarre rituals of freshman orientation, but to meet the miniature version(s) of the guy down the hall, who used to set up a slip-and-slide on south quad when the temperature climbed above 50 degrees. For my wife and I, the question about the quantity and ages of our brood is never an escape valve from awkward social interactions. It is the primary reactant that produces uncomfortable conversations with strangers and confidants alike. “No children,” we say, our voices hopefully revealing our discomfort with the question. Responses generally range from, “Oh, I thought you had a couple,” to “What are you waiting for?” and an occasional, “Oh.” We smile. We laugh a bit. We say, “Maybe, one day.” But how can you tell a complete stranger, a trusted teacher, a friendly cleric, a college classmate, “We’re infertile.” The Diagnosis and Aftermath When I was younger, I always wondered why the scriptures were so concerned with the childless wife. In the Old Testament, Hannah gives birth to Samuel after years of infertility and sings, “The barren wife bears seven sons, while the mother of many languishes” (1 Sam. 2:5). As a theologian, I am well aware of the function of infertility in the scriptures. When the aged Sarah, the elderly Hannah and the mature Elizabeth give birth to a child, the reader is invited to remember that God is the major actor in salvation, not human beings. The surprising reversal of infertility in the Bible is, thus, a sign of new life coming

from death—an action made possible by God, who is the creator and sustainer of human life. But that part of me, who has spent each day of the last six years praying for a child, cannot help but read Hannah’s song as a cry of relief. After years of barrenness, loneliness and tears, finally a child! Of course, when my wife and I were first married, we did not even imagine the possibility of joining the ranks of Abraham and Sarah, Elkanah and Hannah, Elizabeth and Zechariah. We happened upon each other before our senior year at Notre Dame and fell madly in love. At the time, I was preparing to enter Moreau Seminary. After meeting Kara while serving as a mentor-in-faith at Notre Dame Vision (a summer retreat program for high school students on the theme of vocation), I became aware that I was to spend the rest of my life with this woman. Our first date was a frenzied session of discernment, asking whether or not I should give up my previously planned life for a girl I met five weeks earlier. By the end of the date, I came to the conclusion that not only should I date Kara, but before me sat the woman I would marry. Happily, she came to a similar conclusion (mutatis mutandis), albeit just a bit later than me. I chose not to enter the seminary and, a little more than a year removed from one of the most angst-ridden first dates of all time, we engaged to be married. Like so many couples before us, our nuptials took place at the Basilica of the Sacred Heart and the priest prayed over us, “Bless them with children and help them to be good parents. May they live to see their children’s children.” And at our wedding, jokes surfaced about when the first child would be born to this Catholic couple. We, of course, hoped not long. In our first year of marriage in Boston, where Kara was a youth minister and I was a doctoral student, we decided it was time to begin a family. Looking back, we seemed to perceive that having a child would simply happen, once we desired it (of course, we knew the physiology of how such desire would need to be expressed). So, the desiring commenced. Month one passed; month two passed; month three passed. Six months later, our home became the anti-Nazareth, as we awaited an annunciation that never came. The hope-filled decision to conceive a child became a bitter task of disheartened waiting. After a year, we began to see a barrage of infertility specialists who, based upon test results, concluded that we should be able to have a child. No low sperm counts. No problem with reproductive systems. All in working order. The verdict: inexplicable infertility. Unexplained infertility is a surprisingly miserable diagnosis. Something about my psyche was prepared for a scientific explanation—one in which the very fine doctors with advanced degrees from Ivy League institutions acknowledged that unless an act of God intervened, no human life would emerge from intercourse between Kara and me. Indeed, a fair number of tears would have been shed on both of our parts. But with the diagnosis of unexplained infertility, conception is scientifically possible. With every slight change in Kara’s monthly cycle, a glimmer of hope rose in our hearts, only to be dashed with the arrival of menstruation. Kind-hearted family, friends and colleagues who learned about our infertility shared stories about a mother or sister who finally became pregnant. They recommended “doctors” who

had a proven track record of curing infertility. Unfortunately for us, we have no way of knowing if we will one day join the ranks of the middle-aged first-time parent. Every trip to a doctor is a risk because, once again, we start to hope. Aware now, of course, that hope alone does not fill one’s home with children. The aftermath of our diagnosis was extraordinarily painful for both of us. The diagnosis affected not simply our friendships and our own relationship but particularly our spiritual lives. If you speak to an infertile couple, committed to the Christian life, you will notice a pattern: the sexual infertility gradually seeps into the life of prayer. Each morning, I rise and ask God that we might finally have a child. I encounter only the chilly silence of a seemingly absent God. Early in the process, I found particular consolation in the language of the psalms, “My God, my God, why have you abandoned me? Why so far from my call for help, from my cries of anguish? My God, I call by day, but you do not answer; by night, but I have no relief” (Psalm 22:2-3). Like the psalmist, I had my enemies. The well-intentioned barber who stated that the future grandparents must be anxious to get a grandchild out of us. The friendly priest, who upon learning that my wife and I in fact do not have children made it a point to say each time he saw me, “No children, right?” The Facebook feed filled with announcements of pregnancies and births, a constant sign of our own empty nest. God himself became my nemesis: why have duped me O Lord? Why us? We have bestowed some aspect of our lives to, more than many in the world, and our only reward is pain and suffering. Such self-pity, while pleasant enough for a time, is both exhausting and a sure way to end up not only infertile but a narcissist. You begin to imagine that yours is the only life full of disappointment, the only existence defined by sorrow. You close off from relationships with other people, particularly those with children, as a way of protecting yourself from debilitating sorrow. You cease praying, because the words you utter grow vapid, insipid, uninspiring. In this way, I entered into Sheol, hell itself, cut off from the land of the living. Something had to change. Infertility as School of Prayer How did I get myself out of this hell? First, I had to learn to give myself over to a reality beyond my own control. Human life is filled with any number of things that happen to us, despite our desires. We apply to the college of our dreams, only to receive a rejection letter, not because we are inadmissible but because a fellow student is brilliant and receives what might have been “our” spot. We are diagnosed with illnesses, to which we are genetically predisposed. Our family, despite how much we love them, falls apart because of fighting among siblings over how to handle the remaining years of a parent’s life. We die. In some sense, the beginning of true Christian faith is trusting that even in such moments, God abides with us. The God who continues to bring life out of death invites us to offer our sorrow, our wounded hearts, as an act of love. As Teilhard de Chardin writes in his “The Divine Milieu”: “Christ has conquered death, not only by suppressing its evil effects, but by reversing its sting. By virtue of Christ’s rising again, nothing any longer kills inevitably but everything is capable of becoming the blessed touch of the divine hands, the blessed december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 21

influence of the will of God upon our lives. However marred by our faults, or however desperate in its circumstances, our position may be, we can, by a total re-ordering, completely correct the world that surrounds us and resume our lives in a favorable sense. For those loving God, all things are converted into good.” For me, praying the psalms was the beginning of this conversion toward the good. In slowly returning to the psalms in the Liturgy of the Hours, I learned that in uttering these mutilated words from a wounded heart, my voice became Christ’s. My suffering, my sorrow, has been whispered into the ear of the Father for all time. The echo of my words in an empty room called my heart back to authentic prayer. I used short phrases from psalms throughout the day, whenever I was tempted to enter into self-pity, to call myself back toward openness to the Father. The psalms became for me the grammar of my broken speech to God, a way to express a sorrow where words failed to suffice. Second, I also began to meditate upon the crucifix in silence whenever I entered a church. Such silent meditation became essential to prayer, for by gazing at the crucifix for long periods, I discovered how God’s very silence in prayer was stretching me out toward a more authentic love. Meditation, as the “Catechism of the Catholic Church” notes, is a quest whereby “the mind seeks to understand the why and how of the Christian life, in order to adhere and respond to what the Lord is asking” (2705). Has God caused our infertility? No, but have we been called to it? Based upon the six years of infertility, perhaps that is indeed our calling. In contemplating the silence of the cross, the image of Christ stretched out in love, I could feel my own will stretched out gradually to exist in harmony with the Father’s, to accept the cup we have been given. As my will was outstretched, I found new capacities for love—the “calling” of infertility has given me a new awareness of the lonely, the vulnerable, the needy—and allowed me to perceive the true gift of a human life. My meditation upon the image of the cross gave me the strength to go forward with the process of adoption. It sustains me as we continue to wait for a child, a child who may need more love than we can ever give, more care than we can imagine. It enables me to enter into the suffering of the widow, the immigrant, the lonely, who also comes to Mass with a heart deeply wounded. Third, in my formation into prayer through the sorrow of infertility, I have grown in appreciation for the silence and half-sentences of God. The “Catechism” comments regarding contemplation or silence, “It is a gaze of faith fixed on Jesus, an attentiveness to the Word of God, a silent love. It achieves real union with Christ to the extent that it makes us share in his mystery” (2724). In fact, words often still hurt too much to utter. At times I have no energy to utter in prayer—all I have left is an imitation of the very silence I hear in response to my petitions. Through entering into God’s own silence, I find my own bitter silence transformed into one of trust, of hope, of a kind of “infused knowledge” of God’s love that I have come to savor, taste and experience during this growth in prayer. This silence often results in a gift of exhilarating bliss, as if for a moment I have totally united to God. Sometimes, it is a restful silence in which 22 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

Six months later, our home became the anti-Nazareth, as we awaited an annunciation that never came. The hope-filled decision to conceive a child became a bitter task of disheartened waiting.

I hear no speech. I savor such moments because only here do I receive the balm for the sorrow, which so often floods my soul throughout the day. Last, our infertility has slowly led me to a deeper appreciation of the Eucharistic quality of the Christian life. For years, I talked with far too much ease about the “sacrifice of the Mass,” of the Eucharistic vocation of the Christian. How all of our lives must become an offering, a gift to the Father through the Son in the unity of the Holy Spirit. Until I came to know the sorrow of infertility, these words were mere straw, to reference Thomas Aquinas, the Eucharistic poetic par excellence. True self-gift is hard. It is hard to give yourself away to a God, who does not seem to listen to your prayers. It is hard to wait for a child that may never come, to prepare your home with the proper furniture for what seems at times as a pipe dream. It is hard to love your spouse, as deeply as you desire to, when you are distracted by the phantasms of sorrow that have become your dearest friend. It is hard to muster a smile when your friends announce that they will be having another child. It is just hard.

darkness and the darkness will not overcome it. This then is the drama of a life of prayer. I have come to know God’s grace even in the midst of this misery, this vale of tears. It has not healed the sorrow or washed it away. Indeed, there remain moments in which we are awakened to the extraordinary pain caused by this infertility. Christmas is a dreadful holiday, a reminder of the dearth of stockings hanging from our hearth. Infant baptism in the parish, which Kara coordinates, can release a flood of sadness seemingly inappropriate to the festive occasion of a parish celebrating new life in Christ. The images of ultrasounds on Facebook announcing child two and three among our friends remind us again that the only image we have to share is a picture of a new wood floor we might install in our home. (Of course, the wood flooring will be exceptional!) The wound remains and can be opened at a moment’s notice, but prayer has given it a shape, a reason, a participation in God’s very life. Even through this suffering, the Word desires to become flesh in my life through a prayerful obedience to the will of a God, who I cannot quite comprehend.

At these moments, I do not know what else to do but to seek union with Christ himself—to enter more deeply into the Eucharistic logic of the Church, where self-preservation is transformed into self-gift. The Eucharist continues to teach me that I cannot do it myself. I cannot climb out of the sorrow, the sadness, the misery. I cannot fix it all. But, I can give it away. I can offer it up. I can slowly enter into the Eucharistic life of the Church, learning to become what I receive. I can become vulnerable, allowing selfgiving love even in the midst of sorrow, Knowing, of course, that in the resurrection such love has conquered death. Where senses fail, faith alone suffices. If we were not married we could not experience the joy of having children. If we were not married our lives might become an offering of love for the world—to our nieces, our nephews, our friends, to a child yet to be born, whom we hope to one day welcome. Our love can be given to a child who has suffered more from neglect, whether accidental or purposeful, than we do from the absence of a child. Our infertility is not about us; it is about what how God can transform even our sorrow into joy, how even in the shadow of this very real cross, the light shines in the

Conclusion Sometimes, I allow myself to daydream either about one day getting a phone call from our adoption agency or receiving news that Kara is pregnant. This moment would undoubtedly be the happiest of my life, full of a grace that human words would express only in a stutter, at best. Marilynne Robinson gets close in her novel, “Gilead.” John Ames, the protagonist of the novel, finds himself married and with a child in the latter years of his life. His death close at hand, he writes to his child: “I’d never have believed I’d see a wife of mine doting on a child of mine. It still amazes me every time I think of it. I’m writing this in part to tell you that if you ever wonder what you’ve done in your life, and everyone does wonder sooner or later, you have been God’s grace to me, a miracle, something more than a miracle” (52). Of course, such a moment may never come. Nothing in a human life is promised. It is why learning to pray through infertility has been akin to learning to see the possibility of grace, never the guarantee. Otherwise, would such moments be grace, a total gift, in the first place? So we stand waiting for Gabriel. Learning to hear the angel’s voice in new ways—in time spent with our nephew and niece, in time spent with one another, in marveling at the wonder of children not our own. In learning to give ourselves away, not because we want to join the community of parents, but because there are those who desperately need our love, perhaps for but a month. The more I enter into prayer, the more I see that in these grace-filled moments Gabriel has already come. Fiat mihi secundum verbum tuum—let it be done to me according to Your Word. © TIMOTHY P. O’MALLEY, Ph.D. serves as the Director of the Notre Dame Center for Liturgy, and is a Concurrent Professor in the Department of Theology at the University of Notre Dame. Dr. O’Malley is also the founding editor of “Church Life: A Journal for the New Evangelization.”

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 23

How Do I Go

Deeper In Prayer?

By Father Michael Schmitz

“I

want to go deeper in my prayer life, but I’m not sure how to start. What is my first step?” Your first step is the one in front of you. I know that sounds like I am out of the TV show “Kung Fu,” young grasshopper, but it is true. We all find ourselves at different starting points. That means that our first step is going to be our own; it is going to be very personal and unique to ourselves. Your Image of God Yet, there are some general guidelines that might apply to your case. A potential first might be your image of God. I cannot stress how important this is to get right. Not only because God deserves to be known as He has revealed Himself, but also because this will shape every subsequent step. If we are under the impression that God needs to be bribed into loving us or manipulated into helping us or placated when His “fragile ego” is bruised, then that will shape our prayer. This is the false image of the gods presented in the Greek and Roman myths—the gods were fickle, they could not be trusted, their “love” was arbitrary. It is represented quite well in the recent movie “The Clash of the Titans.” In it, the main message is, “The gods need us. We grow more powerful the less we pay attention to them.” The Christian counterpoint to this could be expressed in the “Catechism of the Catholic Church’s” (“CCC”) teaching that, “Whether we realize it or not, prayer is the encounter of God’s thirst with ours. God thirsts that we may thirst for Him” (CCC 2560). God’s “thirst” for us is not arbitrary or needy. In His perfect self-sufficiency, God has made the irrevocable decision to choose us. This decision (this love) is constant, true, and free. God’s Image of You A second helpful step might be God’s image of us. Ask the question, “What does God think of me?” If we think that we are merely an annoyance to God, this will shape our prayer (it may even cause us to avoid prayer entirely!). God’s image of you: you are completely unique in all of creation, you are precious to God, and you are worth loving. That last piece is critical. I talk with many people who wrestle with this wound. They do not believe that they are worth loving, especially in their weakness and sin. This wound is in desperate need of healing and this lie is in desperate need of being exorcized. Three Obstacles to Prayer With these two thoughts in mind, there is a need to take the following step: in spite of the fact that God is infinitely patient with us and has irrevocably chosen us, it is our task to remove any known obstacles between us and God.

Three possible obstacles are pride, unforgiveness, and distraction. 1.To root out pride, we must become humble. This does not mean thinking, “I’m so small, so bad, so inconsequential.” It simply means telling the truth. And the first truth is that there is a God and you are not Him. It means acknowledging that there is someone infinitely “bigger” and infinitely better than you, and that this someone believes that you are worth loving. Humility always tells the whole truth—the happy truths and the hard truths. To know if you are humble, ask yourself, “Am I open to being taught or do I resent instruction and correction?” 2.The refusal to forgive hardens our hearts to God and to others and even makes it difficult to know ourselves. If I am aware that I hold bitterness in my heart, I need to make some effort to express that I am choosing to forgive. This can be extremely difficult (and will most likely have to be repeated many times in some cases!). Remember, forgiveness is not excusing someone’s actions and it is not ignoring real pain. It is the choice to “will the good of the other.” While our emotions can still be inflamed, our decision to pray for someone’s eternal soul (we could say “praying for their conversion ... praying that God’s will is done in their life”) not only fulfills our Lord’s command, but frees us. 3.Distractions can be anything that diverts our attention from what or who should have our attention at a given moment. Sometimes we utilize diversions for entertainment and stress relief and that is great. If recreation is what we should be doing, then games or entertainment are not the wrong thing, they are the right thing. But if I invite distractions in so that I do not have to think about the present, then I am most likely keeping God out of the moment and out of my life. This step is nothing more than the “living deliberately,” as Thoreau wrote. Keep in mind that these are just some very simple beginning steps. None of them can be taken without grace; that is, without the help of God. But remember, God wants to help you take each of these steps. And He is infinitely patient with us while we are learning to walk. FATHER MICHAEL SCHMITZ serves as the director of Youth and Young Adult Ministry for the Diocese of Duluth. He also serves as the chaplain for the Newman Catholic Campus Ministry at the University of MinnesotaDuluth. Father Schmitz’s homilies can be found at www.UMDCatholic. org or on iTunes. Reprinted with permission from FOCUS (www.focus. org/blog).

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 25

M A FATHERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S

BLESSING By Lisa Shefferly-Gillay

26 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

y daughter entered a local monastery to start off on her path as a cloistered Carmelite nun. Since she was a little girl, I have always sensed she would one day become a nun. She is only nineteen years old, very beautiful inside and out, and a joy who will be greatly missed by many. I am weeping and miss her so very much just writing about her. That day was just this past summer, on June 27th, the feast of the Sacred Heart of Our Lord. Her dad and some of her siblings and I were witnesses of her entrance into Carmel. She was in my car as we drove down the freeway, acting every bit the girl I have always known. We talked and listened to music on the radio. She acted silly as we bantered back and forth with our usual routine of one of our favorite ongoing conversations. She argued with her younger brother to be quiet and stop bugging her. Everything just seemed so normal. Then she appeared to be a bit anxious as we got closer to our destination. She said she was getting nervous. Then she looked

over at me—I will never forget the look on her face. A part of me wanted to say, “Noooooo!” yet most of me found a bittersweet joy inside as I looked over to see her pretty brow furrowed. My heart held back its inevitable breaking as I thanked God for such a great honor and gift He bestowed on all of us. Who are we, and who is she, that God called one of our own to be fully joined to Himself? “Praise be to Jesus!” as the Sisters in the monastery say. Yes, praise be to Jesus indeed! We turned into the parking lot of the monastery and waited for the rest of those joining us. A beautiful wood beam and stone building, it is nestled on some acreage in the outskirts of the city. Approaching the front walk, one can sense a deep peace. We knocked on the heavy wooden front door where a volunteer answered and welcomed us. Upon entering, the peace became palpable. We were greeted by a beautiful, small chapel directly ahead of us. Jesus in the tabernacle was front and center in our view. How my heart needed His comfort at this time! We walked through the vestibule where the volunteer proceeded to fill us in as to what we should expect for the Entrance ceremony, but first said we could have a few moments alone in an adjacent private room. We all gathered around our little future nun to say our goodbyes. I asked her dad if he would not mind saying a quick prayer, thinking I would say one next. Sister Laney That is when all the emotions hit us full force. He is my husband from my first marriage and father to all seven of my children. (As a side note, our marriage has been annulled for many years and God has healed that relationship to such a point that it is truly a miracle of His love). So as I listened to the heartfelt prayer and words of blessing that came out of that man, her father and my former husband, I could hardly believe how powerful they were! No other words or prayers from any of us were needed. I remember looking at him and thinking, “Who are you?” It is so very true that the words of a father to his children can either make or break them. A father’s blessing can uplift and a father’s curse can destroy, no matter how old the child, no matter how many years ago it was. How very grateful to God that I was to be able to witness this most intimate of moments, this father blessing his beloved daughter. He lost it. He started to sob and weep and continued for the duration of the ceremony. We were all weeping from there on as well. None of us could contain ourselves. Her dad said it was like he was giving away his beautiful daughter in marriage. And what a bridegroom! The King of kings and Lord of lords, Jesus the Christ! We left our private room and rejoined the volunteer to begin the ceremony. Our daughter was given a lit candle and asked to knock on an inner door three times. When she did, the sisters opened the door wide and greeted her with beaming smiles, welcoming her to enter the inner chambers of the monastery. They told us to wait in

the chapel where we would next see her behind the wall separating the public from the sisters and wearing a new habit, the jumper and veil clothing worn as a first-year sister. We all sat in the same pew and waited a few moments. Then there she was, surrounded by the sisters singing such beautiful songs of joy. Could a family cry any harder? It was all so beautiful! The atmosphere was filled with such a deep and abiding peace and love, we just knew God was truly there. All too quickly the Entrance ceremony was over and we were ushered into the visiting room where we could then talk in private to Mother Prioress, the Sister of Novitiates, and to our dear new Sister in Christ. The visiting room is separated by a wall similar to the one in a chapel and consists of a metal grill with openings large enough so that visitors can hug their family member. We had a long conversation with the sisters about what to expect and the training our daughter would receive. Then we took pictures of our daughter in her new habit. We were told we could visit once a month, a practice they voluntarily keep so they can more fully concentrate on their life of prayer. Our daughter will be learning all about life in the monastery for six years—a sort of engagement period, first as a postulant, then as a novice—before making solemn vows as a full-fledged cloistered sister of the Discalced Carmelites. She can walk away at any time up until that moment should she discern this life is not for her. As the sisters talked, I looked at my daughter’s face. It radiated with such joy and peace that I had a hard time imagining she would ever leave. Oh so quickly our time together had to end. The sisters were calling her to Vespers of the Divine Office. We all said our tearful goodbyes with promises of seeing her in a couple of months. Her father was the last to leave the visitors’ room. I watched as they had a quick intimate moment together, whispering words I could not hear. Of everything that happened that day, I am so very grateful that her last moments together were of that scene— the love and blessings of her father to his beloved daughter. I am still weeping as I write this … Oh Lord God, Heavenly Father, give us, your children here on earth, a powerful blessing of love. Grant that we might know intimately Your love for us, yes truly know this Love deep within our beings. We ask this through Your beautiful Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen. And as the Sisters of Mount Carmel say, “Praise be to Jesus!”

© Lisa Shefferly-Gillay enjoys writing and finds it to be one the best ways to most clearly communicate her thoughts. She is a big fan of marriage and believes it is one of the stepping stones and pathways God has planned for us to reach sainthood and heaven.

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 27

s a m t s i Chr s e l c i t n a C

angelic music h it w n o s a e s e Celebrate th al choirs. from internation ber 6th Beginning Decem 7:30PM EST Every Saturday at and ay at 7:30PM EST Encores on Sund 00PM EST Wednesdays at 8:

World! m lo a h S r u o y n o Only

www.ShalomWorld.org

God's Own Channel

TEN TIPS FOR A BETTER

CONFESSION By Father Ed Broom O.M.V

n the context of an Ignatian retreat it is always beneficial to prepare yourself to make an excellent confession—to do so demands prior preparation. The better the prior preparation, the more abundant the graces and the more overflowing the river of peace in your soul! Following are ten short helps to make the best confession in your life. 1 Improving your reception. As Catholics, two of the most important things we can do are to go to confession and to receive Holy Communion. In these Sacraments we have a direct contact with Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. This being the case, we should make a concerted effort to improve our encounters with Jesus in these Sacraments.

In other words, we should never take these Sacraments for granted. We should also be keenly aware of the concept of dispositive grace. The abundance of graces is received in direct proportion to the disposition of the recipient. On the walls in the sacristies of the Missionaries of Charity is written: “Say this Mass as if it were your first Mass, last Mass and only Mass.” We can apply the same principle: “Confess as if it were your first, last and only time.” 2 Pray beforehand. All is grace! A source of abundant grace is the communion of saints. Why not pray to the holy confessors to help you to make a good confession? A few are the Cure of Ars (Saint John Marie Vianney), Saint John Bosco, Saint Leonard of Port Maurice, Saint Leopold Mandic, Saint Padre Pio, Saint december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 29

Francis Regis, Saint Alphonsus Liguori, Saint Anthony Claret and Saint Ignatius of Loyola. Pray to them to help you to confess well—that each confession you make is better than your prior confession. 3 Prepare even the night before. Have a good examination of conscience booklet and then find a quiet and contemplative place to examine your conscience. Utilize the crucifix and Divine Mercy image to elicit sorrow and trust. You can try to write down the sins so that you will not forget them once in the confessional. Also, pray for your confessor—to his guardian angel—before you enter the confessional. 4 Self-knowledge. One of the classical steps to make a good confession is contrition, coupled with a firm purpose of amendment. This entails rewinding the film of your life and seeing the various falls into sin, as well as capturing the preceding causes that led to the sin. Maybe it is a person that jeopardizes your spiritual life. Who knows, maybe it is a recurring situation at work or family/ Maybe it is your physical state of weariness. Still more, maybe it is some improper use of the electronics media and lack of prudence. You will often notice an established pattern that leads to the slippery path and collapse. For this reason, the faithful observance of a daily examen can prove a valuable tool to know yourself, as well as supply the necessary knowledge to avoid the near occasion of sin. 5 Biblical passages to prepare yourself. The Church highly recommends the use of Sacred Scripture as a means to prepare us for a better reception of the Sacraments. Two excellent passages I would recommend are Luke 15 and Psalm 51. Luke 15 presents the Parables of God’s mercy, and the greatest is the Parable of the Prodigal Son. By praying Psalm 51 you have one of the best “Act of Contrition” ever composed, by none other than King David, after having committed adultery with Bathsheba and killing an innocent man. Praying with the Word of God adds extra power to your prayer! 6 Frequent confession. The saints highly recommend frequent confession as a most efficacious means of growing in sanctifying grace. Confession either restores sanctifying grace or it augments it. Of course this presupposes a thorough preparation. 7 Sacramental grace. Each sacrament communicates grace. However every sacrament communicates a specific grace pertinent to that specific sacrament. For example, 30 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

the specific sacramental grace communicated in the Eucharist or Holy Communion is that of nourishment. It is the bread of life for the journey on the way to eternal life. The sacramental grace of confession is different. It is healing! Jesus came to feed us with His Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity. Furthermore, He came as Divine Physician. Time and time again in the Gospels we see Jesus healing. The blind, deaf, deaf-mute, lepers, paralytics and even the dead were healed and brought back to life by Jesus. Within the context of the Church the Mystical Body of Christ Jesus heals us. The sacraments of healing are the sacraments of confession and the anointing of the sick. 8 Qualities of a good confession. In the “Diary of Saint Faustina,” the most important qualities of a good confession are highlighted in 113: 1) complete sincerity and openness; 2) humility; 3) obedience. By adhering to these qualities you cannot go wrong. Remember, we want to strive to make better communions and confessions until the end of our lives. 9 Avoid discouragement. Even though you might fall frequently, never give in to discouragement. Some bad habits have possibly clung to us for decades. Many have a “microwave” spirituality—namely instant holiness! It does not work that way. Change is often tedious, laborious and painful. The key is to keep praying, working and fighting as a true soldier of Christ to be liberated from the shackles of sin. Of course a key message from the “Diary” is that the worst thing possible is to fail to trust in God’s infinite mercy. As Saint Paul reminds us, “Where sin abounds God’s mercy abounds all the more.” 10 Mary and mercy. Never forget to invite Mary to be present in your preparation for confession. Even ask Mary to enter with you into the confessional so that you make the best confession of your life. Saint John Paul II called the Marian sanctuaries—Lourdes, Fatima and Guadalupe—“spiritual clinics.” How true! Lines of penitents await to meet the merciful Jesus in the confessional in these Marian sanctuaries. Among the many beautiful titles of Mary are “Mother of Mercy,” “Mother of Good Counsel,” “Health of the Sick.” Behind many powerful conversions is, of course, the grace of God, along with maternal intercession of Mary!

Less Stuff. More Substance. Think about all the gifts you have given and received over the years.Â Werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the best gifts the ones that came first from the heart, before it came from a wallet?

As the seasons change, let the gift that you share with your friends, neighbors, and strangers be the heartfelt gift of the Good News of Jesus Christ and His Church! Subscribe to Shalom Tidings and give the ongoing gift of good conversations, inspirational stories, insight into prayer, powerful witnesses, and wisdom from the heart of the Church to all those that you love! Every gift is an encounter with the giver. Let your gifts lead others closer to Christ! Would you consider sharing this gift with others? For a fast and easy way to order the magazine, either for yourself or for your parish, prayer group or community, please visit: www.ShalomWorld.org/tidings or, please complete the form below and mail it to: Shalom Media USA Inc., 211 East Wisconsin Road, Edinburg, Texas 78539

This Is Good News For A New Generation.

Yes, I would like to subscribe to Shalom Tidings magazine Mail to: Full Name____________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Address______________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Apartment/Unit_______________________________________________City_______________________________________________________ State_______________________________________________________Zip________________________________________________________ E-mail________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Phone #____________________________________________________Cell_____________________________________________________ Payment Options (choose one): Enclosed is my check or money order ACH (enclosed is a void check) Charge my:

Visa

Master Card

Amex

Discover

Full name on credit card__________________________________________________

Shalom Tidings magazine is now available in the Apple Store iOS and on Android Tablets

Card #_______________________________________________________________ Expiration Date__________________________CVV Code________________________ Signature

Special Pricing for the Christmas season! (expires December 31, 2014) $10 for 6 issues $20 for 12 issues For more information and to find out Sponsorship rates, please visit www.ShalomWorld.org, e-mail us at tidings@shalomworld.org or call (215) 366-3031.

WE ARE THE PRO-LIFE

GENERATION By R.J. McVeigh

s the Great Lakes Regional Coordinator for Students for Life of America (SFLA), I work full time in the pro-life movement. As a part of the SFLA Field Team, my job involved working directly “in the field” as I help establish SFLA groups at high schools and colleges, and I help advise and equip student leaders at these schools, and help to facilitate regular activism events on campuses. I also have the privilege of working with a team from all across the United States to impact the student pro-life movement on a national level. I suspect that it is because I love my job so much that people are often surprised when I tell them that being vocal, public, and an activist does not come easily to me. I was raised in a Catholic home and attended Catholic schools since I was a child. In high school, I began to develop an interest in philosophy and was privileged to explore many works on the Christian faith by Plato, Aristotle, Aquinas, Augustine, C.S. Lewis, and Dr. Peter Kreeft. We memorized formal logical fallacies and 32 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

talked about formal arguments for God’s existence. I considered myself an academic/intellectual Christian who did not like stepping outside the comfort zone of the classroom. I was strong in my faith and knew the “right answers” about the Christian stance on social issues, but I had zero interest in rattling the corrupt and misguided cultural cage. I knew what was wrong with the world, but I wanted to be comfortable more than I wanted to fix it. By the time I started college, I began dating my future wife. She was in the process of starting a SFLA group at her university. Mostly because of her passion on the issue, I joined the Students for Life group at my own college. The following January, I took my first trip to the annual March for Life in Washington, D.C.. It was also during the activities of March for Life, that I attended the Students for Life of America conference. That day was a turning point for me. The Students for Life of America Conference was, and still is, the largest pro-life conference in the country. I was immediately blown

away by the size and composition of the attendees. There were almost 3,000 people, most of whom were high school and college students. Abortion suddenly did not seem like an issue that should only be quietly dissented; rather, on that day, I realized that it is an issue which I could actively do something about and which my peers were already actively doing something about. At the Conference, I was particularly impacted by those speakers who talked about “Pro-Life Apologetics.” They made a logical, formal, and powerful academic case against abortion. Their words took root in the fertile soil of my mind that had been nurtured by my Catholic school and my love of philosophy, and things began to click. Talking about the reasons why we oppose abortion had the philosophical depth I desired, but it also had an immediate call and impact on what needed to be done about it TODAY. We knew in our hearts that we were right in our position—and that meant that we had to do something about the thousands of pre-born who were dying daily. For the first time, I understood abortion and its impact on a level I had never encountered before. During the ride home from the conference, I recalled when I was five years old and learned about the slavery of AfricanAmericans. I could not understand how anyone or government could allow another person to be enslaved. Even as a child, I thought that, if I had lived during the times of slavery, I would surely be an abolitionist. As an eighteen year old, I realized I would not have fought against slavery in yesteryear if I was unwilling to fight against abortion today. With my newfound passion and

R.J. MCVEIGH (mcveigh@studentsforlife.org) was raised in Holt, Michigan and is a graduate of Grand Valley State University. He and his wife celebrated the birth of their daughter in 2013. McVeigh can be contacted to help start or train a pro-life group in the Great Lakes Region (Michigan, Indian, Ohio).

How do you get this generation of young people not just to be pro-life, but to move past apathy and engage and equip them to take a stand in their high schools, colleges, and medical and law school campuses? Students for Life of America (SFLA) is part of the answer. It is one of the nation’s most active pro-life organizations and the largest youth pro-life organization. It is

dedicated to training and equipping college, high school, medical, and law school students. Its approach is uniquely effective and the methods used are a combination of time-tested techniques and cutting-edge technology. In the past eight years, SFLA has built up more than 700 student pro-life organizations and has trained tens of thousands of students nationwide. With national conferences and internship and leadership programs, it trains rising stars of the pro-life movement and connects them with other national pro-life organizations, as well as U.S. Congressmen and Senators. Simply put, Students for Life of America wants to abolish abortion in our lifetime, and they plan to do that by identifying, educating and activating this generation of young people. Visit www.StudentsForLife.org to get informed and support its mission.

understanding, I became more involved in the SFLA group at college. By the end of my freshman year, I was elected as the president. I applied to, and was accepted into, the William Wilberforce National Leadership Fellowship through Students for Life of America. This helped me get connected with pro-life leaders on a national level and learn vital skills about being a pro-life activist. I began reading and studying pro-life apologetics. While continuing to grow and work with my SFLA chapter, I later interned with Students for Life of McVeigh and his family America. Before I graduated college, I even participated in two formal debates about the morality and acceptability of abortion on college campuses. All of my involvement in Students for Life, and the relationships I formed through it, led to me becoming the Great Lakes Regional Coordinator for Students for Life of America after I graduated. Day-in and day-out I am blessed to work with amazing people in an organization that makes a real difference in the lives of young women and men throughout college campuses and in high schools in America. Because of them, I truly believe in the mission of Students for Life of America—that we WILL abolish abortion in our lifetime.

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 33

Men, Church, Evan

“Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.” mother teresa

“We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love and that love comes with community.” dorothy day

ecently I was honored to take a good friend and priest out to lunch to celebrate his ordination to the priesthood. I had been sick the weekend of his ordination, sitting in the back of church during his Mass of Thanksgiving and quickly exiting as soon as it was over to avoid coughing on everyone. It was good to finally sit down and thank him for laying down his life for the good of the Church. Over the course of our lunch, we started talking about young adult ministry, especially ministry to men and young fathers. The elephant in the room had always been what to do about pornography and sexual sin. Church leadership had long been aware of the unhealthy statistics, bishops had written letters on it, and there was plenty of free (useless) advice floating around. We talked about how frequent confession and regular Mass attendance did not help these men from breaking their habit of pornography. They were constantly

surrounded by a culture that suggested that sex be used illicitly, as often as possible, and for recreation. Our sexual value was to be used as a means to an end instead of recognizing that a person's dignity is an end in itself. I frequently encountered men—even parish leaders—who came to me and admitted that they were struggling with pornography; in some cases, they had been abusing it and battling the temptation for years, even decades. A few years ago, a great guy I knew, a father of six, shared with me that he had been trapped by pornography for more than 30 years—one time, in one idle moment of curiosity when he was a teenager, he had found his dad's stash and the addiction was born! What caught me off guard was when he told me that viewing pornography in print and on the computer was no longer enough. He had started going to gentleman's clubs. I was floored. If you look

angelization And Loneliness By Adam Janke

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 35

out into any crowd at Mass, one priest told me, you can bet that more than 50 percent of the men in the pews have a problem with sexual sin. I have been to Catholic youth conferences where 90 percent of the teen boys stand up when asked if they feel addicted to pornography. But there was a line that they did not cross, right? Since then I have spoken to men who have gone further and have seriously endangered their marriages, health, and especially their souls. I have discovered that there was one common denominator to every single one of their experiences. With regard to the friend who confessed to going to strip clubs—after he went to confession, he sat for hours alone in the church examining his conscience. He talked with his wife (who, through God’s grace, forgave him) and he talked to his pastor. He had a moment where he realized that it was not about sex. He said that he really abhorred being in the clubs, but that he was desperate for real human connection and was trying to fill a feeling of emptiness within. Even though he knew in his heart that he was not going to find that fulfillment in the club, he went there anyway. He realized that he suffered a profound loneliness and a spiritual desolation. He had tried to find connections in his local parish but felt everything he experienced was fake; when he tried to reach out he felt rejected. He said he had plenty of '”friends” but no one in whom he could confide. He had been part of a men's group at church for more than a decade, but they were never vulnerable with one another. They only talked about how amazing their lives were. He felt like the odd man out because they seemed to be happy and he was lonely. As Father and I talked over lunch,

he spoke about his work to start a new men's group specifically for this problem and hoped that I could give him some feedback on how to get guys to attend. In my experience there are three things that have to exist to help them crawl out of this terrible hole they found themselves in. It would work no matter what the sin was. They needed grace, grace, and more grace. The Grace of Friendship Men who are battling with an addiction to pornography are used to experiencing feelings of shame. Shame leads to isolation and sin finds a refuge in secrecy. Sometimes, even a church group can be isolating. If you are not in the “in” crowd it can be tough just to show up. And if you are comfortable in the group, it can be even more difficult to get people to move from being nice to each other to being in love with another for the sake of the good of the other person—to form real friendships and open the possibility of true vulnerability. That kind of vulnerability would allow for a guy to say, "I have a real problem and I need your support" without fear of shame and judgment. That is how you know whether your faith-sharing group has succeeded. Keep in mind that it may not happen out in the open, but someone might pull you aside because they see you as a real friend. Those friendships lead to accountability. Every

guy I have talked to who had a porn problem and no longer has a porn problem had an understanding friend to keep him accountable, someone who would say, "Brother, you have a porn problem, I understand, I was there, and the great news is that God wants to do something amazing in your life." Accountability alone is okay, but it does not fix the root of the problem—loneliness. We need the grace of friendship. The Grace of Forgiveness People who deal with pornography addiction or face sexual sin for years experience a real unrest in their life. When I went to confession and said, "Father, I feel like I've confessed the sin of jealousy 50 times in a row!" He responded, What do you want—a whole new set of sins?" His point was that God was working on me, do not give up; keep coming back to see Jesus in confession. We all need absolution, a fresh start. I have talked to guys who were so eaten up by guilt that I had to say, “You deal with sexual sin. Look at you Mr. Unique. Guess what, you're not alone? Not even remotely. God wants to heal the brokenness in you, but you have to let Him by forgiving yourself and letting Him forgive you.” Guys who get out of bad habits have the grace of friendship and the grace of forgiveness. This forgiveness comes through the Sacrament of Reconciliation and by binding and casting out the evil spirits we are dealing with. If I just threw you off there, consider that the ordinary work of the devil is temptation. We have a guardian angel watching over us, and we have evil influences convincing us our sin is not too bad and that we deserve to indulge because our legitimate needs are not being met. We need to deal with this brokenness by engaging in spiritual warfare by allowing others to pray with us for freedom. There are methods to help parish ministries through this process. Confession alone often is not enough. Imagine what our parishes

could do in the world if we were creating intentional disciples who lived in the freedom of Christ instead of being chained as slaves of sin? So, we need friendship and accountability in order to experience freedom from spiritual desolation. WThe Grace of Communion We are not made to be alone. We are made to be in communion with each other and with God. Once we deal with the loneliness, brokenness, and need for forgiveness we come to spiritual growth through communion. Men need to go to Holy Mass, pray the Rosary, and spend time in Eucharistic Adoration. Men who I have talked with who have broken out of the bondage of sexual sin typically go to Mass at least one day a week in addition to Sundays and days of obligation. They know they will fail if they do not spend time with Jesus Christ. This is war. Do not leave yourself exposed. I feel it in my gut if I do not spend enough time in Eucharistic Adoration. I know when it has been too long. Guys who are free also spend time talking to their Mother every day through the Rosary. I have never met a guy who prays the Rosary daily who still uses porn. It is like losing weight, right? We all know the answer to the question of “How do I lose weight?” The problem is that many of us do not like the answer because we love to eat high-fat, sugary, junk foods! "Exercise and healthy eating! No way, I'll just take this magic pill the guy on TV sold me!" Fasting is also a part of the equation to break free from sexual sin. As we finished our lunch, it left me thinking about the ministry of the Church as we propel ourselves forward to the implementation of the New Evangelization. I am excited by the genuine renewal taking place at all levels of ministry and hope to see it continue to grow. Our ministries exist so that we can foster relationships with one another and grow in sanctity as we get each other to heaven. Every time I go out to the street to evangelize, every time I meet someone, I meet someone whom God loves, whom God is passionate about, and whom God is jealous for. “This person, this is my Son. He’s run away from home. Tell him I love him.” Our Holy Father Pope Francis is right in reminding us of the urgency of the New Evangelization. It cannot wait. Our enemy is on the prowl. Saint Michael, pray for us.

Adam Janke became Catholic in 2005 after spending years as an antiCatholic fundamentalist. Through the use of new media evangelizations, the students at the St. Paul Center for Biblical Theology (www.SalvationHistory. com) helped to bring Janke to into the Catholic Church by sharing with him what Catholics truly believe. Janke now works full time at a small parish in Michigan. In addition, he runs the local chapter of St. Paul Street Evangelization (www.StreetEvangelization.com) in Lansing, Michigan.

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 37

WAYS TO BE MODERN DAY MACCABEANS

he combination of the President of the United States inauguration speech and the anniversary of Roe v. Wade in January 2013 served as a drastic wake-up call to the current state of our country. 1. After 40 years, abortion is still legal in the U.S. and has already killed more than 55 million individuals. 2. The religious liberty of millions of Americans is being threatened as health care reforms are attempted to be enacted. 3. The definition of marriage is changing quickly. In times like these we can be prone to despair. We can feel helpless, like things are out of control. I find it helpful to look to examples in the past for inspiration. By looking at the history of God’s people, we can find strength in knowing how they endured and how God responded to their prayers. My favorite inspirational story for our time is the story found in 1 and 2 Maccabees. The Story of the Maccabees The time period is about 150 years before the time of Christ. Alexander the Great has unified most of the known world through his conquests, but when he dies his kingdom is divided among his generals. One of these general, Antiochus Epiphanes, comes to power and unleashes hell on the Jewish people. (By the way, these events would later turn into the Jewish holiday of Hanukah). 38 Shalom tidings october/noveMBER 2014

By Kevin Cotter

The actual account in Scripture is riveting (1 Maccabees 1-3), but for the sake of brevity I will bullet point some low points: ◗ Antiochus demands that the Jewish people stop practicing everything that make them Jewish (circumcision, kosher laws, and the worship of Yhwh). He conquers Jerusalem and burns it down. He plunders the Jewish temple and replaces the worship of Yhwh with the worship of a Greek god. This alone would have been enough to throw the entire Jewish world into despair, but it gets worse. ◗ If anyone continues to practice their faith, they face the punishment of death. They are not allowed to celebrate their feasts or the Sabbath. All children who are circumcised are hung from their own mother’s necks. This is all with the hope that the Jewish people would forget their laws and become unified with the Greek people. ◗ So, how do the Jewish people react in this situation? Many of them give in (sound familiar?). 1 Maccabees 1:13 says that some eagerly gave in. They sacrifice to idols. They profane the Sabbath. They go so far as to uncircumcise themselves (!) in order to not have any distinguishing marks on them that would separate themselves from the Greeks when they exercised naked in the gymnasium. But the essential part of our story is how the faithful Jews responded. Few traitors are remembered

in the annals of history. The ones who fight despite the desperate situation are the ones who go down in history books as glorious heroes. The story of the Maccabees (as an aside, the term Maccabeus means “hammer” and refers to Judas Maccabeus who eventually becomes the Jewish leader at the time) helps set out a blueprint for what to do when faced with a destructive culture and a group of so-called faithful who readily give in the immorality at hand. Let’s look at five ways to be modern day Maccabeans: 1. Mourn. Throughout the first three chapters of Maccabees we find gut-wrenching reactions to these atrocities. They rip their garments. They put on sackcloth and ashes. They weep at what they are seeing. They question why they should even live any longer (1 Mac 2:13). The verses below in 1 Maccabees 1:25-28 seem to capture the essence of the moment: “Israel mourned deeply in every community, rulers and elders groaned, maidens and young men became faint, the beauty of women faded. Every bridegroom took up the lament; she who sat in the bridal chamber was mourning. Even the land shook for its inhabitants, and all the house of Jacob was clothed with shame.” The situation had become so dire that even the prospect of marriage, one of the most joyful moments in life, was devoid of joy. And, did you catch this line—“The beauty of woman had faded.” This is one of my favorite lines in Scripture and I am unsure whether I fully understand what that means, but it seems as if man could not find beauty in women because life had become so unbearable. Brothers and sisters, this is a bad situation! The key takeaway for our lives today is to not forget what is happening in our country. It can be easy to want to distract ourselves from our situation, to forget what is happening in our country, but we must face it. We must mourn. We must weep at the atrocities that are around us. 2. Rally together. After watching his fellow Jews offer sacrifice to idols, a man named Mattathias calls out, “Let everyone who is zealous for the law and supports the covenant come out with me!” As the Greeks ransacked cities and forced Jews to stop practicing their religion, many fled. But, the faithful did not go at it alone. Instead, they called their fellow believers to live out their faith, and they rallied together. Mattathias and his sons flee to the hills, and those who sought righteousness and justice met them there (1 Mac 2:28). The annual March for Life is a great example of the faithful banding together for the sake of life. In our families, friendships, and parishes, we need to continue to charitably call Catholics to be aware of what is going december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 39

on in our country and to call them to be dedicated to their Catholic faith despite the costs. 3. Fight back. Mattathias and his sons call faithful Jews to the wilderness. It is here that they begin forming plans on how to attack the Greeks and take back their land. They organize an army. They tear down pagan altars. They circumcise Jewish boys. They fight courageously and confidently even though they are greatly outmatched. The Maccabees do not rally together just to form one big Jewish Jacuzzi where they can be safe from the world and not have to worry about it anymore. Rather, they rally together so that they can strengthen one another for the battle. In times like these, we can make the mistake of finding fellowship with likeminded believers and forget the battle that needs to be waged. We must not be afraid to fight. Even when we think everything is against us and we do not think that we have a chance. Now, I am not saying that we should throw down the pagan altars of our culture and commit violence to apostates. As Christians, our fight is one that is won with courage and love. If we want people to recognize the dignity of the unborn child, we must learn how to respect everyone’s dignity. If we want people to know the truth about our faith, we must live out our faith in radical and compelling ways. Saint John Paul II was faced with so many atrocities during his youth as he lived through Nazi and Communist

regimes. While some of his friends and classmates took up arms against their enemies, he took up prayer and self-sacrifice and joined the seminary. His gift of self in tumultuous times resulted in amazing victories for the Gospel during the 20th century. We can do the same in the 21st century. 40 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

4. Remember the past. Mattathias eventually finds himself on his deathbed and has time to tell his sons a few last words. His advice: “Remember the deeds of the fathers, which they did in their generations; and receiving great honor and an everlasting name…Was not Abraham found faithful when tested…Caleb, because he testified in the assembly, received an inheritance in the land…Daniel because of his innocence was delivered from the mount of the lions…” We can get so locked into the moment that we forget God’s amazing actions throughout salvation history. The Maccabees are a great example, but we can also look to the saints as well—the martyrs of the early Church, Saint Francis of Assisi, Saint Ignatius of Loyola, and numerous examples during the 20th century. One of my favorite examples is Blessed Pier-Giorgio Frassati. As a college student, he cared for the poor and marched in a rally against Italian fascism, all while living a life of joy. We need to fill ourselves with the stories of the saints. They give us hope, inspiration and courage! 5. Persevere. Finally, the Maccabees persevere. They fight a battle over several decades. Faithful Jewish people give their lives for the faith over and over throughout the story. One incredibly touching story is found in 2 Maccabees 7 as the seven sons of one mother are killed for their refusal to give up their Jewish faith. They are willing to be sacrificed because they know that there is more than this life. There is a greater battle going on that God is ultimately winning. There was no quick fix to the problems they had and there is no quick fix to ours either. Making real and lasting change to our country and culture will not happen overnight, but we must not let this discourage us from sacrificing our lives for the cause. The blood of the martyrs is the seed of the Church. Whether or not we die for the faith or suffer for it, our sacrifices mean something here and in eternity. Let us look to the book of Maccabees for courage and let us be modern day Maccabeans.

KEVIN COTTER serves FOCUS as the Director of Web and FOCUS Equip. Previously, he served as an on campus FOCUS missionary at Benedictine College. Cotter holds a bachelor’s degree in Religious Studies from the Benedictine College and a master’s degree in Sacred Scripture from the Augustine Institute. He is the author of “Through the Year with Pope Francis” and the soon-to-be-released, “A Year of Mercy with Pope Francis.” Cotter resides in Denver, Colorado with his wife, Lisa, and their children. Reprinted with permission from FOCUS (www.focus.org/blog).

How do we

change the world?

One young girl said yes to God over 2,000 years ago and changed the world. What Mary, the Mother of Jesus, did was begin a revolution. The world needs this Jesus revolution more than ever! Shalom World provides all the resources to encounter Jesus Christ and share that encounter with others. Through television, retreats, conferences, books, magazines, and new media, we are here to help deepen and grow your faith! Like Mary, are you ready to say â&#x20AC;&#x153;yesâ&#x20AC;? to Him? www.ShalomWorld.org

God's Own Channel

When we give generously, Scripture promises us that God will not be outdone in charity. This season, consider making your act of charity an act of faith and support Shalom Media! Your financial gift, beginning in prayer and backed by it, is essential in sharing, cultivating, and sustaining our multifaceted missionary work. With your support, we can continue our greatest task and our greatest privilegeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;to boldly proclaim that the Gospel is indeed JOY to the world because our Savior has come!

Your Donation Today Will Follow You And Lead Others Into Eternity! Shalom World TV is a channel of peace. To bring this peace to the world, we need your support. Through your support, may you also become a channel of peace! To help SHALOM WORLD in our mission to share the peace of Christ, Donate at: www.shalomworld.org/donate or complete this form and mail to: Shalom Media USA, 211 East Wisconsin Road, Edinburg Texas 78539 First Name: ____________________________Last Name:___________________________ Address: _________________________________________________________________

Method of Donation Bank Account withdrawal (Enclose a VOID Check) Check, payable to Shalom Media USA; Check Number:_________________________ Credit/Debit Card (Complete the card details below) Card Type:

Visa

Master Card

American Express

Discover

City: _______________________State:__________________Zip Code:_________________ Email : ___________________________________________________________________

Name on card: ________________________________________________________

Phone: _________________________Cell:_______________________________________

Card Number: ____________ - _____________ - _____________ - _____________ Expiration Date: ___________/_______(month/year) Security code:________________

Become a Monthly Partner/Supporter (includes SPF Membership) $25

$50

$100

Other $:____________________________________________ Authorization

Deduct the amount from my account on the: 1st of each month

15th of each month

Today

I Authorize Shalom Media USA to process this payment.

My Onetime Gift (this does not include SPF Membership) $25

$50

$100

Other $_____________________________________________

Become a Sponsor (this does not include SPF Membership) by making a one-time donation of $5000 or more: $ __________________________________

Signature: ___________________________________ Date: _____ / _____ / ______

PEOPLE LISTEN TO

WITNESSES By Father Noel Connolly

n 1975 Pope Paul VI made the powerful comment, “Modern man listens more willingly to witnesses than to teachers, and if he does listen to teachers, it is because they are witnesses.” They are sobering words especially for missionaries. They always remind me of a poster which featured a huge hippopotamus with a massive yawn. The caption read, “When all is said and done, more is said than done.” I am also reminded of a parable I once heard about a young African called Kahua. Kahua lived in the hills above a vast savannah in East Africa. One day he came down to the savannah and turned up at the Catholic compound where he met the priest. Kahua asked for a job for six months and, as the priest urgently needed someone, Kahua was given a job working closely with the priest. It turned out that Kahua was honest and industrious, imaginative and reliable and, above all, he got along with everyone. The priest came to rely on him and was shocked when just short of the six months Kahua came to tell him that the time was almost up and he would be leaving in a week. “No, Kahua, you can’t go. I need you. I know I have been cranky and difficult at times, and I probably haven’t paid you enough, but I promise to be better and make it up to you.” Kahua explained that it really was not about money. He reminded the priest that he lived in the hills and that one day as he was thinking about his life he had looked out on the savannah below, where he saw the Christian compound and the Muslim mosque. He knew they were among the great world religions and thought they might have the answers for which he was searching. So he told the priest, “I thought I would go and work for you and the Imam for six months each, and then I would know which religion was best for me. Now it is time to go to work for the Imam.” “My God, Kahua, why didn’t you tell me!” muttered the priest. But the fact is most people do not tell us. They watch us. It is our witness, not our homilies, that is important. People want to see that in everyday life we are compassionate, patient, kind and rarely jealous, angry or petty. I do not think people expect us to be perfect, but they want to see that our faith makes a difference. They want to see that we still have hope in our hearts and faith in the future and room for others in good times and in more difficult situations. Kahua was smart in wanting to learn about religion not from the Priest’s or Imam’s homilies but from working with them. The quality of our works and lives speak more powerfully than anything we can say. Witness and teaching necessarily belong together. The problem with some of our missionary endeavors is that our witness does not measure up to our teaching. We can be a little like the hippopotamus when we say much more than we do. COLUMBAN FATHER NOEL CONNELLY lives and works in Australia. Reprinted with permission from the Columban Fathers (www.columban.org)

BOOK review: By Mark Phillips

ahweh, King of Kings, Jesus, Emmanuel, Wonderful Counselor, Lion of Judah, Holy Spirit. Our Lord has many titles. Each describes a small aspect of the infinite magnitude of the Creator of the Universe. We, the people of Jehovah, the followers of Christ, the children of Abba, use these names to focus how we come before God; how we address God; how we interact and understand God. When I began reading “Jesus the Bridegroom: The Greatest Story Ever Told” by Dr. Brant Pitre, I expected a book that would explain one of these names and give me another way to approach the throne of my Lord. It certainly did that, but it accomplished much more. This book allowed me to study the Bible in a way I had never done before. By addressing the Jewish roots of Jesus’ title of Bridegroom, the author illuminated connections between the Old and New Testament I had not understood before. In a clear and concise way, Dr. Pitre revealed Jesus as a Jewish man in a Jewish world, living with Jewish traditions. And within those traditions, He revealed Himself to be the Bridegroom of the Church. Obviously, the Old Testament and New are two parts of the same book, and there are many connections between the Jewish people waiting for the Messiah in the Old and His arrival in the New. However, the author showed just how connected these two halves are. In one small but pertinent example, Jesus met a Samaritan woman at a well outside of Jerusalem. He had a long conversation with her about her checkered past and a future with Him. Three times in the Old Testament, a foreigner (Moses, Abraham’s servant, and Jacob) meets a woman at a well, talks with her, and then ends up marrying her. The author does more than list quotes in Scripture pertaining to Jesus as Bridegroom and explain how they define the Church as the Bride. He goes beyond reflecting on Old Testament prophecies and the Song of Songs’ love story. Instead of solely using the Bible as its own authority, he discusses Jesus in history. He refers to other ancient texts which support ideas about the Jewish people, how they related to each other, and how they related to God. He explains in detail Jewish customs, especially wedding customs, so that we can better understand how Jesus’ words and actions relate to them 44 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

and, more importantly, to us. The author describes events in Jesus’ life in and around Jerusalem and how they communicate His role as our heavenly spouse. For example, Dr. Pitre breaks down the details of the miracle of the water into wine at the wedding of Cana. He shows how, as a guest at the earthly wedding, Jesus’ actions pointed to His own nuptials in the future. That wedding, as it happened, was the crucifixion. Not shying away from the gruesome irony that anyone— even Saint Paul—could compare a humiliating, tortuous death with a wedding celebration, the author demonstrates that this sacrifice was exactly that. Jesus gave all of himself to us, just as a bridegroom gives all of himself to his bride. Who should read this book? It is approachable by any Christian who wants to have a deeper understanding of God’s love for us. If the idea of Jesus as the Bridegroom and the Church as the Bride is confusing, this is exactly the correct book to read. Any student of the Bible—which should be every one of us— will benefit from the historical, scriptural, and spiritual lessons taught. It is clear without being simple and informative without being complicated. The ideas are more complex than the basic lessons of Sunday school, but they are taught in a way anyone can understand. A reader does not have to have any understanding of Scripture, nor a particularly mature faith to profit from the book. There are many ways reading “Jesus the Bridegroom” can help our faith journey. It deepens our understanding of Scripture. It deepens our understanding of Jesus’ role in our lives. It offers us another avenue to approach our Loving Father, our Advocate, our Redeemer and Savior, whose name is above all names. MARK PHILLIPS is a stay-at-home dad, homeschool teacher, and

freelance writer. He is part of the leadership corps of a family prayer group, where he leads prayer meetings and teaches Bible-study. He is author of “The Enemy in Your Cupboard,” a book designed to help suffers of Celiac Disease, and has recently written “A Donkey Named Flea,” a children’s book about the Christmas story. Phillips is a regular columnist for “Shalom Tidings” magazine. He lives with his wife and four children in Springboro, Ohio.

Media Scan Full Armor Band Full Armor formed more than seven years ago when the band was asked to lead music for a new youth Mass in their hometown of Middletown, New York. Over time, the band began to receive invitations to participate in other Christian/ Catholic ministry events in their region. All of their hard work and determination paid off in 2008 when they were asked to perform for then Pope Benedict XVI's youth rally in New York City in front of 25,000 young people. This past January, they performed at a youth rally for the 2014 March for Life. Today, Full Armor continues to share their music and ministry at parish and diocesan concerts and conferences nationally. They have performed all across the Northeast, Midwest, and as far as California. Their greatest joy is seeing God change the lives of the young people to whom they get to minister. “It’s been exciting for us to see the youth we work with grow in their faith and relationship with God over time!” says drummer Matt Juliano. “It’s important for us to remember that no else one has the same talents, flaws and life experiences. Those differences are what God uses to give us all unique and individual purpose for our lives.” Full Armor Band is more than just music. They are encouraged and inspired by their Catholic faith to try to bring the Gospel message to everyone they meet. They minister to people of all ages, through concerts, conferences and retreats. For more information, visit www. FullArmorBand.com. Online for Life Online for Life is a compassionate, technology-driven non-profit organization committed to rescuing children and families from abortion. Through cutting-edge Internet and traditional marketing outreaches, OFL connects with abortion-determined women and men. Through the OFL Call Center, they provide these individuals with the option to make an appointment at one of OFL’s approximately 50 participating life-affirming pregnancy resource centers in 23 states. The centers provide life-affirming compassion, care, sonograms, and tangible help. Every effort is made to lovingly protect the unborn child and family from abortion. In addition, prayer requests, OFL updates, and compelling stories are shared through the OFL Prayer App and their large social network community. To find out how you can leave a mark on the world by saving babies, visit www.OnlineForLife.org.

Decision Point: Confirmation Program Regardless of the role you play in the faith-building process of the young people in your life, you will not want to miss out on this great program that prepares them for the Sacrament of Confirmation. Applying best practices is what Matthew Kelly and Dynamic Catholic are all about, and their mission to help people understand the genius of Catholicism is at the core of their Confirmation program. From observation, prayer and thousands of hours of work, they offer Student/ Leader materials and DVD resources in a program that fosters dialogue (not monologue) and a way to proclaim the Gospel that is “fresh, intriguing, relevant, compelling and attractive.” So why be Confirmed? Let us look at life and ask ourselves what the “best version” each of us would look like? And if God desires this, then does His Church give each of us, right where we are, the best possible tools to get us there? Nothing is more relevant and radical than asking these questions. It is genius in its simplicity. It is authentic in its teaching. It is bold in its presentation. It is also free, sans shipping and handling. Visit www.DynamicCatholic.com/ confirmation for more information.

Charity Mobile What if the cell phone service that keeps you connected to family and friends can, at no additional cost to you, help save lives of countless others? Charity Mobile was formed to help make that happen! They are a pro-life and pro-family cellular company with nationwide digital networks with talk, messaging, and data services that will not bog you down with contracts, termination fees, or change of plan fees. When you sign up, Charity Mobile will donate five percent of your monthly cell phone plan price to your favorite pro-life or Catholic charity. Along with their subscribers, they have already sent more than $1 million dollars to support those who are working on the front lines to cultivate the culture of life in America. Visit their website at www.ProLifeCatholic.com for more information on their packages and their no-risk, 30-day return policy as you prayerfully consider what the Lord might be calling you to do.

december 2014 / january 2015 Shalom tidings 45

UPCOMING EVENTS 2015

January

March

8th Cathedral Ministry Conference Minneapolis, Minnesota

Western Canadian Catholic Home School Conference

12-15 Featured speakers include Father Jan Michael Joncas, Father Thomas J. Reese, Dr. Dianne Bergant. ○ For more information, visit www.CathedralMinistry.org

12-14 Featured speakers include Most Reverend Archbishop Gerard Pettipas, C.Ss.R., Jim Morlino. ○ For more information, visit www.wcchsc.net

February

March

North Texas Catholic Men’s Conference Hurst, Texas

Catholic Men’s Fellowship Conference Towson, Maryland

Featured speakers include Father Larry Richards, Tom Peters, Michael Coren.

Featured speakers include Father Donald Calloway, M.I.C., George Weigel, Dr. Edward Sri.

○ For more information visit www.ntxcmc.org

○ For more information, visit www.catholicmensfellowship.com

March

May

The National Association of Catholic Chaplains National Conference Arlington, Virginia

Catholic Health Alliance of Canada Annual Conference Saskatoon, Saskatchewan

Featured speakers include Joseph J. Driscoll, Debra A. Canales, Ann Garrido, John L. Allen, Jr.

Featured speakers include: Father Thomas Nairn, O.F.M., Father Mark Miller, CSsR, Dr. Brian Goldman, Dr. Philip Berger, Daniel Lussier, Micheline St-Hilaire, Dawn MacDonald.

6-9

○ For more information, visit www.nacc.org

6-8

○ For more information, visit www.chac.ca

46 Shalom tidings december 2014 / january 2015

Je Wh s u o Is s?

tidings Shalom

A Bi-Monthly Catholic Magazine

Life GOD HAS COME TO GIVE me

Before I formed you in the womb I knew you and before you were born I consecrated youâ&#x20AC;Ś Jeremiah 1:5

PRO-LIFE IS COOL Why is Surrogacy Wrong? JAN 15

Men, Church, Evangelization, and Loneliness

Dec2014 /Jan2015

$3.99 01

74470 80718