Turning Tragedy Into Awareness

Left: Ashley Lamps, Aden’s mom, began the Aden Lamps Foundation in 2014 so she could spare other mothers from potentially losing their children in the same way she did. Right: Lori Brown of Cherry didn’t know how to deal with the death of her son, Justin “Buddy” Pratt, after he died from a heroin overdose at the age of 26. The closest groups or organizations to help her deal with her grief were in Joliet. Brown then created Buddy’s Purpose to help mothers who lost their children to substance abuse.

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These Illinois Valley women turned their heartbreak into a way to help others

By Brandon LaChance

Life can throw some sad, depressing, and hurtful situations our way. One of the most painful experiences possible is losing a child. Whether the child was young or an adult when they died, parents feel the loss of their child every day for the rest of their life.

After losing a child, it can be easy for parents to fall into a depression, but for some, it’s helpful to grieve by helping others. When Ashley Lamps and Lori Brown lost their children, they started foundations and reached out to anyone who was going through the same thing they were.

Ashley Lamps began the Aden Lamps Foundation in 2014 after her son, Aden, passed away. Aden was born August 21, 2012, and didn’t wake up from an afternoon nap at daycare when he was almost five months old.

“After his passing two things happened, I needed help right away. I wanted to know who I could go to because I didn’t know how to handle it,” said Ashley, 39, who was raised in Spring Valley. “The other thing was, how could I help prevent this from happening to someone else.

“I do think creating this foundation and keeping Aden’s name alive has really helped in my grief. Anyone who has lost a child can tell you that grief can be a lonely road. I feel, personally, you have to find something, some way to channel your energy; otherwise, you can end up in a deep, dark place.

“When I do something good like delivering new sleep sacks or trying to find new ways of educating people, this has really helped me in my grief,” she said. “I attend the Compassionate Friend’s support group and I thank them every day for being there for me. I strongly believe Aden’s foundation and the group saved my life.”

Aden’s foundation started

SUBMITTED PHOTO Aden Lamps passed away when he was nearly 5 months old during his naptime at a caregiver’s house.

with the mission of providing sleep sacks – a zip-up, wearable blanket – to local hospitals in Peru and Spring Valley, but now they also provide them in Ottawa and Morris. Ashley has added an infant board book, safe sleep information, and onesies with a safe sleep message on them.

“On the front, they (the onesies) say, ‘This side up,’ and on the back, they say, ‘Turn me over,” Ashley said.

As of July 15, 2022, the Aden Lamps Foundation has given away 8,252 sleep sacks and 5,880 safe sleep infant board books.

Pack ‘N Plays have been given to those in need free of charge, and a buy-back program was started as a lot of products on the market are not safe for sleep. If the product presented to them is on the list, such as a rock and play sleeper or a crib bumper, the Aden Lamps Foundation pays the owner of the product with a Walmart or Target gift card and disposes of the item.

At first, Aden’s death was officially called SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome), but later it was ruled as a SUID (Sudden Unexpected Infant Death). Upon research, Ashley found babies also die in their sleep because they’re not being put in the safest sleeping conditions.

Aden wasn’t found on his back, and there was a fleece blanket on the bed with him, which could have both been contributing factors in his death. In addition to beginning the foundation, Ashley connected with Illinois Senator Sue Rezin to push safe sleep information further.

“I wanted there to be more information to the public because I feel that education is key, and the more information people have, the more they’ll realize the risk they’re taking when they put their baby in a situation that is not safe,” Ashley said. “I worked with Sue Rezin, and the law passed. I had conference calls with coroners and officials in Springfield to figure out the logistics of the wording. Now, when a baby dies, they have to fill out a report which gives information such as where the baby was located, was there a blanket in the bed, who was watching the baby, were there other siblings around when the baby was sleeping?

“The coroners already had a report they had to fill out, but this report provided more information. The law states the state of Illinois has to record this information on its website for the public,” she said.

There is a safe sleep display at the Peru Public Library where parents can see an actual crib with a doll in a sleep sack and information on the wall stating how to properly put your child to sleep. The Aden Lamps Foundation also holds a 5K walk and run every year.

Lori Brown didn’t go through the pain of losing an infant. Instead, she had to face the devastation of losing her 26-year-old son, Justin “Buddy” Pratt, to a heroin overdose on November 11, 2011.

Brown, who has lived in Cherry for most of her 55 years, didn’t know where to go, who to talk to, or what to do with her grief.

“My son was struggling with substance abuse for 8 to 10 years before he passed away. On the day he passed, it was devastating and chaotic,” Brown said. “When I left his apartment, I went to see my mom (Carol Gisler), and I told her I was going to talk about it. I wanted to talk about the disease of addiction and substance abuse and how I felt about it, and the struggle I had of not talking about it and not having a place to go in our community to discuss my feelings or get advice from others who were in the same situation that I was in.”

Brown was advised to see a doctor, be prescribed some medicine, and let it control the grief. She immediately said no, and she decided to go another route – starting an organization.

“I was trying to plan his funeral and I was talking about what happened, but yet I didn’t know how to talk about it or how to express how I felt as a mother,” Brown said. “I got online and I started Googling overdose deaths and support. I found a nationwide support group called GRASP (Grief Recovery After Substance Passing), and the nearest support meeting to Cherry was in Joliet.”

Brown met Julie Wendorf

SUBMITTED PHOTO The Aden Lamps Foundation has been responsible for distributing safe-sleep information and thousands of safe-sleep items to families, including sleep sacks, Pack ‘N Plays, onesies, and infant board books.

Left: Lori Brown of Cherry holds a picture of her son, Justin “Buddy” Pratt, who died from a heroin overdose in 2011. Right: Buddy’s Purpose helps educate others about substance abuse and connects people who have lost loved ones to addiction, so they can talk with someone who understands the heartbreak they’re going through.

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Tragedy

FROM PAGE 7 from Ottawa, who lost her son Chris Halterman four months before Buddy’s passing. They carpooled to the meetings in Joliet and connected as the mothers got more out of the car ride than the meetings as they let loose on how they felt about the deaths, feeling alone in the situation, having nowhere to go, and having no resources.

They went to the GRASP retreat in Florida and learned a lot about substance abuse.

“I took it all in and realized, ‘Now that I know it, I can share it amongst our community.’ On August 31, 2012, Julie and I held our first overdose awareness walk,” Brown said. “Then I got the ideas to start a support web page, a Facebook page, get it into the newspapers, and really start talking about substance abuse and overdoses.

“Buddy’s Purpose became a non-profit in 2013. Since then, we’ve held ten overdose awareness walks. I’ve gone to four GRASP retreats. I’ve been to Washington D.C. with Julie to walk and protest in front of the White House. We attended United to Face the Nation, which is intended for people recovering from substance abuse,” she said.

Brown, who is trained in how to use the overdose prevention drug Naloxone (Narcan is a popular brand), has also put up billboards and began meetings once a month with the Dare 2 Care group. Now Buddy’s Purpose is affiliated with the Perfectly Flawed Foundation in La Salle.

“Buddy’s Purpose is about awareness, bringing it to the community, and Narcan training. The Perfectly Flawed Foundation has paid staff through grants,” Brown said. “I am their family support specialist. They have a mobile wellness van that we go to homes, perform Narcan training, and give them love kits (personal hygiene products).

“Buddy’s Purpose is going to have a small gathering for Overdose Awareness Day on August 31. We’re not going to do a big walk this year. Buddy’s Purpose is there for people who reach out to me. I will give them a Smart Recovery meeting (family support) and I do that through Perfectly Flawed, but Buddy’s Purpose is part of it as we are a team.”

The organization for Justin Pratt has remained small and intimate so people can have close one-on-one or group conversations with those who have gone through losing a child to an overdose.

Brown doesn’t want anyone to feel like she has, but if they do, she wants them to know people are here to help with their grief.

“I remember after Buddy passed away and a friend came to my house and brought me food. She asked if Buddy was an addict,” Brown said. “I said yes, and she said, ‘Well, you never talked about it.’ She wasn’t an extremely close friend but someone I’ve known for most of my life, and I said, ‘It wasn’t something I wanted to advertise.’

“In my eyes, I thought if I didn’t talk about it and my son got into recovery and onto a clean, healthy, sober path in life, then he wouldn’t carry that burden. People wouldn’t judge him. He would be able to get a job easier. I was protecting him and myself. After he passed, I felt I didn’t have to protect that anymore and I needed to talk. I needed to talk for me and for the other parents going through it.”