Wellness In-Sight: Begin to Be

CINDY E. FARRAR

Picking up where we left off last month, intention put into practice becomes habit. The habit over time becomes our way of being. Each moment of being we manifest and become who we really are.

Five years ago, as I was anticipating the upcoming Life Coaching Certification program I had enrolled in, I stumbled upon an E.E. Cummings quote. “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” The quote defined my intention for the work with my then future clients (and their businesses) who would be seeking coaching. It also precisely stated what I believe to be our life’s quest, to become who we really are. What does that mean? An expanded understanding would be “to come into existence as the individual we authentically are in this present moment.” It is not as heavy as it sounds.

In the beginning of the quote, Cummings prepares us right off. First and foremost, “It takes courage.” It takes literal strength of heart. Etymologically, courage and heart share the same Latin root, ‘cor.’ Author and professor Brene Brown writes, “In one of its earliest forms, the word courage had a very different definition than it does today. Courage originally meant, ‘to speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.’” Over time, this definition has changed; courage is now often synonymous with bravery. We may experience fear and we can still persevere.

Next in the quote is “to grow up.” There is more to it than developing from child to adulthood. As Merriam-Webster states, “to grow toward or arrive at full stature or physical or mental maturity; to begin to exist and develop as time passes.” It infers a progressive maturation to holistic development. There’s a reason that it doesn’t happen all at once. It’s like when we were learning to walk. Sure, sometimes we would fall. We might then crawl a little before clumsily getting back up. Once on our feet, we took a step or two, then steadied ourselves, finding our balance. Until we were finally walking with a sense of stability and our own unique stride. Ultimately, we developed the confidence and physical ability to run (staying upright most of the time). So, it is with growing up. At each stage, again we are just beginning.

The process happens differently for each of us. It doesn’t happen overnight. We cannot be anyone other than who we are. No one else can get us to the point of existence. It is for each of us to find our grounding at each new beginning of our coming to be. And to tell all of our heart, even if our voice trembles. Who you really are awaits. Me.

A little girl aged five Is asked, What do you want to be When you grow up?

Proudly exposing her missing front teeth She smiles widely and says

I want to be a mommy just like my mommy. At thirteen years old she is asked Now that you are a teenager What do you think you want to be? She shrugs avoiding the questioning eyes I guess I’ll be a nurse So I can help people.

At her high school graduation Again she is asked Now what are you going to be? Her head swimming from all the possibilities She replies, I’m not sure.

Some years later, Speaking to the woman making eye contact with the woman looking back from the mirror She winks and declares I think I will just be me.

C. Farrar

CINDY E. FARRAR, LMT, BCTMB, CLC is a licensed massage therapist, certified life coach and the owner of Massage Associates of Atlanta, LLC (Lavista Road in Tucker). In addition, she is a certified Qi Gong instructor and a nationally approved continuing education provider for massage therapy and bodywork. Cindy enjoys sharing insights on wellness and personal and community development as a speaker and writer.