MIND & BODY

BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE,

BE LESS CRITICAL OF YOURSELF

WRITTEN BY CHELSEA BRIMER

Almost everyone can benefit from a confidence boost now and then, but what, exactly, is self-confidence, and how can you increase it? Simply put, self-confidence is a sense of satisfaction with, and trust in, your feelings, abilities, and personal judgment. It’s what allows you to be positive yet realistic about yourself and your situations. So what happens when you don’t feel confident? According to the Mayo Clinic, “low self-confidence can negatively affect virtually every facet of your life, including your relationships, your job, and your health.” But there are steps you can take to boost self-confidence, even if you’ve felt bad about yourself for years. Perspective plays an important part in how you see yourself and the world around you—the whole “glass-ishalf-empty” versus “glass-is-half-full” business. Both viewpoints are true, but one allows for a more positive outlook on life than the other. If you can learn to adopt the glass-is-halffull view, your self-confidence will start to rise. For instance, if you find yourself always running late, don’t beat yourself up over it—acknowledge the fact that you may show up late, but at least you always get there. Another way to help change your perspective is to start focusing on your talents instead of your flaws. What do you love doing? What is it that you do well? Take pride in those things; it will help you feel accomplished, which in turn will help build your confidence. Next, recognize your insecurities and listen to your thoughts about them. According to the Mayo Clinic, self-criticizing situations might include a family crisis, business presentation, job loss, or trouble with a spouse, loved one, or coworker. What do you tell yourself about those situations or behaviors? Are you beating yourself up? Pay attention to your self-talk and see if you can take a more positive outlook or approach. Make sure you are not comparing yourself to others. Boosting your

self-confidence means improving yourself and the way you feel, not trying to make your life exactly the same as someone else’s. Their lives are irrelevant to yours; what is relevant is caring about yourself and advancing your own personal goals and aspirations. So forget about them! Do some soul searching of your own and find out what standards you want for yourself.

Once you begin changing your perspective, you can start taking actions to boost your confidence. Here are some tips and tricks you can use to keep self-criticism in check and kick your self-confidence into high gear:

Accept compliments grace-

fully. Don’t roll your eyes or say negative things about yourself in response. Smile and thank the person who complimented you.

Take up more space. Check

your body posture throughout the day—are you slouching? Leaning forward? Making yourself look smaller? Sit or stand up straight and throw back those shoulders! Studies have shown that confident posture projects confidence to others, and will in turn make you feel more confident. Help others. Even little things like holding the door open for others or being sure to thank those who help you will brighten your day. And when those around you see you being kind and helpful all the time, they will be more kind and helpful, too. And then you’ve made the world a better place.

Put care into your appear-

ance. You don’t have to look like Cindy Crawford or George Clooney, just take some time every day to maintain basic personal hygiene: shower, brush your teeth, fix your hair, and wear clean clothes that fit you properly. People tend to treat you with more respect when they can see that you treat yourself with respect.

Make eye contact. (But don’t be

weird about it.)

Avoid negative people. That

friend who always one-ups you with the latest and greatest of everything or who pities you for one reason or another—kick her to the curb. Part of maintaining your own self-confidence is making sure those around you aren’t trying to bring you down. Be thankful. No matter what you do or don’t have, you surely have more than some. And being thankful for the family, home, job, vehicle, or life you have is a powerful way to maintain a positive attitude. Keeping these pointers in mind will help make sure your self-confidence is top-notch and help you keep self-criticism at bay.

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