Lion Pride Newspaper
8th Edition Friday, April 6, 2018
Schoo Sectio
Behind The Scenes With Security We interviewed two of the security guards, Mr. Hackbarth and Mr. Hoffer, for this edition of behind the scenes of school security. They have both had experiences on the streets with the DPD. We decided to look into this pressing matter, after recent events and a great assembly given by Mr. Hackbarth. Interviewer: How many years have you been working at St. Mark’s? Mr. Hackbarth: Full time, I’ve been working at St. Mark's for five years. I was associated with St. Mark's for thirty years working as an onduty police officer. I: What made you want to come to St. Mark's? Mr. Hoffer: The student body is so smart and so polite. It is so different than the thirtyone years I did on the streets of Dallas. I: When did you know you were going to be a police officer? Hoffer: When I was in the eighth grade, I had a cousin in the FBI, and I looked up to him. I told him in the eighth grade I wanted to be just like him.
I: What has been your most exciting call? Hackbarth: When I was working in the SWAT, I got a call about a loose gorilla in the Dallas Zoo. Now that was a weird call. We were all a little bit scared, but we managed to take control of the situation and capture the gorilla. Hoffer: Some of my most fun times were in highspeed car chases, chasing after bad guystrying to apprehend the bad guy while trying to keep the civilians safe. I: What is your biggest fear of crime at St. Mark’s? Hackbarth: My biggest three concerns for the safety and security of this campus are carpool in the morning and pick up in the evening because there are a lot of moving parts. My second concern is the bleedover activity from the big companies in the Preston Royal Shopping center. When you have big companies that means there are higher chances for bad guys to do bad things. If, in an attempt to get away, they came on campus, there a high risk for things to happen. Finally, all of the afterschool events and sporting events. This campus is buzzing from 8 in the morning to 8 in the night. I: Have you ever been injured? Hackbarth: There are some calls that you know are going to be dangerous, but you have to respond. It just happened I was on a SWAT, and I was shot in the leg during a drug war, but I'm all right now. Hoffer: I think injuries are very common when you work on the police force. A lot of times when arresting the bad guy you have to pat him down to assure he is not a threat. When I was patting someone down he had a rusty nail in his pocket, and I got stabbed. It wasn't anything like his (Mr.Hackbarth), but it was a little bit frustrating.
The Spring Break Italy Trip
Over the break, while some people were in Vail and Lake Texoma, a group of St. Mark's boys traveled overseas and arrived in Italy. Starting in Palermo, Sicily, these Americans traveled the span of Sicily, took a boat to Naples, and marched toward Rome. The group toured wellknown sites such as Pompeii, and some other lesser known locations like Ostia Antica, the first Roman colony.
These Americans broadened their horizons and explored the unknown, which included an Italian supermarket and making lifelong memories from that short trip. These boys were Marksmen from the classes of 2023, ‘24, and ‘25, all hailing from Dallas. Mr. Lange, Mrs. Terman, and Mr. Hunt were our chaperones for the trip. We were fortunate enough to explore ancient ruins and Roman villas. We learned so much about Roman history and architecture because we were able to experience it ourselves. We also ate a lot of pizza and gelato. We got to be a part of history, and it only makes sense why we would want to go to Sicily and Italy again. It is unlike anything in Dallas, and we’ll never forget the times we spent in places where we could only dream of visiting. Our group spent over half of the trip in Sicily, the triangular island right off the southern coast of Italy. Sicily was an important location to many civilizations in
the Mediterranean. We were able to see theaters and temples built by the Greeks and modified by the Romans. We also got to see the structure of a villa owned by the Roman emperor. Our group even saw a temple set up by the ancient people of Sicily to imitate a Greek temple and convince the Athenians that they were a powerful Greek citystate. We explored cities in Sicily such as Palermo, Agrigento, Syracuse, and Taormina. After our overnight stay on the ferry, we docked on the coast of Italy and drove from Naples to Rome. It was easy to get lost in the beautiful but vast city. In Pompeii and Ostia Antica, we could see how the Romans lived and the structure of their cities. We experienced the magnificence of the Colosseum, the Pantheon, and the Trevi Fountain. We even explored catacombs and the Circus Maximus.
March Mammal Madness While many of you have been following March Madness this month, Mr. Mead’s classes have been focusing on March Mammal Madness, which is a simulated battle tournament between mammals. First, the contestants are selected, as well as the habitat. Next, the March Mammal Madness people decide the probability of one of one of the mammals winning. Then they utilize a random number generator to decide the winner. For example, animal 1 has a 70% chance of winning a battle, while animal 2 has a 30% chance of winning. If the number generated is 70 or less, then whatever animal is 1 wins. Otherwise, animal 2 wins. After the winner is decided, a situation where the winning animal would win in the given habitat is shared with the public. This year competitors will be from four divisions: the Antecessors, the Great Adaptations, the Urban Jungle, and When The Kat’s away, a group of nonmammal animals. As this is being written, the championship round has been decided. Now, I know you are curious, so here are the results. Wild Card Match: Gold Crest vs. Praying Mantis. As the goldcrest eats a fly, the praying mantis comes out of nowhere and consumes the gold crest’s brains Winner: Praying Mantis 1st Round: Great Adaptations: Pygmy Hippo vs. StarNosed Mole. The hippo kills the mole with its furious headshake. Winner: Pygmy Hippo FatTailed Dunnart vs. Cheetah. The Cheetah, in a short amount of time, engulfs the dunnart. Winner: Cheetah
Crabeater Seal vs. Edible Dormouse. The Seal showed us that the edible dormouse is edible. Winner: Crabeater Seal Water Deer vs. Solenodon. The Solenodon left the field of battle, confusing the deer. Winner: Water Deer Jaguarundi vs. Desman. With a furious pounce, the desman is eliminated. Winner: Jaguarundi Tasmanian Devil vs. Ghost Bat. The Tasmanian Devil, hiding in a bush, ambushes a flying ghost bat. Winner: Tasmanian Devil Aye Aye vs. Coatimundi. The Aye Aye, a very strange animal, confused the coatimundi, causing it to flee from the strange creature. Winner: Aye Aye Maned Rat vs. Platypus. The platypuses ankle spurs were not active during this time of year, resulting in a maned rat victory. Winner: Maned Rat Urban Jungle: Belo Horizonte Marmoset vs. Harar Hyena. The Hyena had a quick and easy meal. Winner: Harar Hyena Bristol Fox vs. Raccoon. The Raccoon is scared by the fox's big size and flees the battlefield. Winner: Bristol Fox Moscow Dog vs. Sewer Rat The Moscow Dog sees the rat and decides to get food from a human. Winner: Sewer Rat Coyote vs. Opossum. The opossum had her young with her and she decided to retreat. Winner: Coyote
Bobcat vs. Striped Skunk. The two stare at each other until the skunk gets bored and leaves. Winner: Bobcat Berlin Boar vs. Eastern Gray Squirrel. The boar steals the squirrel’s food, but the squirrel flees at the sight of the boar’s huge tusks. Winner: Boar Porcupine vs. Delhi Rhesus. The Delhi rhesus climbs a tree, but touches a porcupine and gets a hand full of quills. He flees but runs into an electrical wire. Winner: Porcupine Cape Town Baboon vs. Common Hedgehog. The Baboon flips over a trash can, scaring the hedgehog and making it curl up into a ball. The Baboon then flips the Hedgehog over and takes a big bite. Winner: Cape Town Baboon Antecessors : Amebelodon vs. Deinogalerix. As the deinogalerix flees the field of battle, the amebelodon catapults it moonward. Winner: Amebelodon Doedicurus vs. Jugulator. The jugulator tries to flee, once realizing that the ock it was on, wasn’t a rock, but then gets murdered by the mighty doedicurus. Winner: Doedicurus Dimetrodon vs. Aegyptopithecus. The Aegyptopithecus was quickly shredded by the dimetrodon. Winner: Dimetrodon Andrewsarchus vs. Nuralagus rex: After a long staring contest, the andrewsarchus ate the nuralagus rex. Thylacoleo vs. Procoptodon. The procoptodon was quickly ambushed and consumed by the Thylacoleo. Winner: Thylacoleo
Pseudaelurus vs. Archaeoindris. The pseudaelurus, in a tree, eats attacks and consumes the Archaeoindris. Winner: Pseudaelurus Cynognathus vs. Thalassocnus. They are both in the water, but the cynognathus gets swept out to sea. Winner: Thalassocnus Homo floresiensis vs. Palaeoloxodon. The Homo floresiensis came across was being charged at by a palaeoloxodon, but the palaeoloxodon broke its leg. Winner: Homo Floresiensis When The Kat’s Away: Orinoco Crocodile vs. Praying Mantis. As two crocodiles are fighting, the mantis gets sprayed with a jet of water. Winner: Orinoco Crocodile Goliath Tarantula vs. Bothrops Asper. The asper is ambushed by the tarantula and the tarantula gives a fatal bite. Winner: Goliath Tarantula Secretary Bird vs. Horseshoe Crab. The bird, hungry, decided to kill the crab with a fatal kick. It worked. Winner: Secretary Bird Alligator Snapping turtle vs. Mantis Shrimp The shrimp gives a punch to the turtle’s snout, busting it open. Winner: Mantis Shrimp Eurasian Eagle Owl vs. Beaded Lizard. In an effort to protect its children, The owl pierces the lizard’s chest with its beak. Winner: Eurasian Eagle Owl Komodo Dragon vs. Giant Salamander. The Komodo dragon spied the salamander under a rock. The Komodo dragon swept it and delivered a fatal chomp. Cookiecutter Shark vs. Common Octopus. The octopus ambushes the shark and murders it. Winner: Common Octopus
Green Anaconda vs. Tardigrade. The anaconda, in search of food, sends the Tardigrade tumbling of a leaf and onto its back. Winner: Anaconda?????? 2nd Round: Great Adaptations and Urban Jungle: Pygmy Hippo vs. Maned Rat. The rat spies the hippo and flees at the sight of the hippo’s enormous size. Winner: Pygmy Hippo Tasmanian Devil vs. Water Deer. The water deer stumbled upon a Tasmanian devil eating a dead kangaroo. The water deer, disgusted, with the revolting sight, left the battlefield. Winner: Tasmanian Devil Jaguarundi vs. Crabeater Seal. The jaguarundi tries to eat the seal, but the seal rolls over and smashes the jaguarundi. Winner: Crabeater Seal Cheetah vs. AyeAye. The cheetah and ayeaye see each other in a tree and both fall out. The ayeaye turns its back on the cheetah and the cheetah eats it. Harar Hyena vs. Bristol Fox. They both find a carcass; the fox bows in submission; the Harar hyena shakes the fox's neck but shakes it too hard and the fox dies. Winner: Harar Hyena Coyote vs. Sewer Rat. The rat tries to flee but runs into a dead end, so it jumps into the coyote’s mouth, accidentally. Winner: Coyote Bobcat vs. Berlin Boar. The Bobcat takes out one of the boar's eyes but is then flung into a wall. Winner: Berlin Boar
Porcupine vs. Cape Town Baboon. The baboon tries to eat the porcupine but flees because it gets a face full of quills Winner: Porcupine Antecessors and When the Kat’s Aaway: Orinoco Crocodile vs. Goliath Tarantula. In an attempt to blind the crocodile the tarantula shoots webs at its eyes, but the crocodile defends these shots and with a mighty chomp the tarantula is no more. Winner: Orinoco Crocodile Secretary Bird vs. Mantis Shrimp. With the smoosh of a foot, the shrimp is no more. Winner: Secretary Bird Eurasian Eagle Owl vs. Komodo Dragon. The Komodo dragon easily swallows the owl. Winner: Komodo Dragon Common Octopus vs. Green Anaconda. The octopus’ cells burst immediately, and the anaconda goes on, still carrying the tardigrade. Winner: Green Anaconda Doedicurus vs. Thalassocnus. The doedicurus, thinking that the thalassocnus is a predator, rams into it, killing it. Winner: Doedicurus Thylacoleo vs. Andrewsarchus. The Thylacoleo draws first blood but gives up after the andrewsarchus delivers a nearly fatal attack. Winner: Andrewsarchus Pseudaelurus vs. Dimetrodon. The pseudaelurus is scared by the dimetrodon’s sail and flees the battle. Winner: Dimetrodon Homo floresiensis vs. Amebelodon. The hominid scared by the amebelodon’s great size, flees the battlefield. Winner: Amebelodon
Sweet 16: Orinoco Crocodile vs. Secretary Bird. The bird is startled by the crocodile and attempts to flee, but the crocodile eats one of the bird’s limbs. Thankfully, the bird escapes. Winner: Orinoco Crocodile Pygmy Hippo vs. Tasmanian Devil. At the sight of the pygmy hippo, the Tasmanian devil flees the battle. Winner: Pygmy Hippo Berlin Boar vs. Porcupine. The porcupine hits the boar with over 80 quills. The boar, in pain, retreats. Harar Hyena vs. Coyote. The coyote runs from the hyena and makes it across a road, but the hyena gets hit by a car. Winner: Coyote Crabeater Seal vs. Cheetah. The seal got heatstroke. Winner: Cheetah Dimetrodon vs. Amebelodon. The Amebelodon kicks the Dimetrodon in the sail, sending it flying off the battlefield. Winner: Amebelodon Komodo Dragon vs. Green Anaconda. The Anaconda, protecting its food, gets its tail bitten off. As a result, The anaconda breaks the Komodo dragon’s neck. Still carrying its tardigrade passenger the anaconda slithers away. Winner: Green Anaconda Doedicurus vs. Andrewsarchus. After losing a tooth to the doedicurus’ tough hide, the andrewsarchus retreats.
Elite Trait: Coyote vs. Porcupine. The coyote and porcupine fall out of a tree, and the porcupine impaled by its own quills is finally flipped over and chomped. Pygmy Hippo vs. Cheetah. The hippo tramples the cheetah in a bloody mess. Winner: Pygmy Hippo Orinoco Crocodile vs. Green Anaconda. The anaconda dies of cancer and the tardigrade jumps onto the crocodile’s back. Winner: Orinoco Crocodile Amebelodon vs. Doedicurus. The doedicurus is flipped over and killed, but the amebelodon tears a muscle in its jaw. Winner: Amebelodon Final Roar: Coyote vs. Pygmy Hippo. In Central Park, the coyote is taken by humans and put into the wild. Winner: Pygmy Hippo Amebelodon vs. Orinoco Crocodile. The Amebelodon smushes the crocodile multiple times. However, the tardigrade escapes onto the Amebelodon’s trunk. Winner: Amebelodon Championship Round: Pygmy Hippo vs. Amebelodon. The amebelodon decides that this is not the battle for him and retreats, but the tardigrade jumps onto the hippo. Winner: Pygmy Hippo and Friend Source of Information: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkMOPwzGRRvbHglHmV9gj1g
An Interview with Mr. Mead Given that Mr. Mead had gotten us started on Mammal Madness, we decided to interview him about it. Interviewer: What inspired you to start doing March Mammal Madness with your 6th graders? Mr. Mead: I learned about it during March Mammal Madness and thought this would be fun to do with my sixth graders. Interviewer: How did you get the tardigrade info from Dr. Katie Hinde? Mr. Mead: I told about March Mammal Madness on my blog, and Dr. Katie Hinde thought that it was cool, and I got to know her. So, when the tardigrade came along I asked her about it, and she told me. Interviewer: What are your feelings about the tardigrade riding on everything’s back? Mr. Mead: I think that it is very interesting and when the reasoning behind it is revealed, I think that my 6th graders will be very fascinated with the information.
Review Sectio 5 Movies That Every Middle Schooler Should See 5. Indiana Jones (Temple of Doom) [PG] The second of the Lucas/Spielberg Indiana Jones movies is set a year or so before the events in Raiders of the Lost Ark . Indiana Jones needs to retrieve a precious gem and several kidnapped young boys on a remote Indian village. This time he teams up with a singer and a young boy. This movie, exciting and thrilling, received 85% on Rotten Tomatoes. “The sustained furore of humour, visual panache and headlong momentum makes for dazzling cinema. All of which makes it possibly Spielberg's most underrated film.” Ian Nathan Empire 4. The Rookie [G] A true story about a coach who discovers that it's never too late for dreams to come true. Jim Morris (who had never made it past the minors in his career) never made it out of the minor leagues before a shoulder injury ended his pitching career twelve years ago. Jim's team (The Owls) makes a deal with himif they win the district championship, Jim will try out with a majorleague organization. This heartfelt movie received 86% on Rotten Tomatoes. “A fine example of heartwarming reallife drama, with performances that ring true and some terrific moments that befit a classic American Dream story.” Angie Errigo Empire
3. Space Jam [PG] An evil alien and a theme park owner need a new attraction at Moron Mountain. When his gang, the Nerdlucks(a bunch of cute little aliens), heads to Earth to kidnap Bugs Bunny and the Looney Tunes squad, Bugs Bunny challenges them to a basketball game to determine if the Loony toon squad will be slaves on Moron Mountain. The aliens agree, but they steal the powers of NBA basketball players, including Larry Bird and Charles Barkley. Then, Bugs Bunny gets some help from superstar Michael Jordan (who has retired from basketball and is now playing baseball). This hilarious movie received 93% on Rotten Tomatoes. “A harmless mishmash of basketball and animation that'll entertain kids” Rotten Tomatoes 2. Talladega Nights [PG13] Ricky Bobby has lived life in the fast lane all his life. When the Driver that his pit crew intends to quit, Ricky Bobby has to step up and drive. The world soon knows Ricky as a champion racer with a trophy wife and two reckless kids. Soon a Frenchman rushes onto the scene and ruins everything. Ricky Bobby gets in a nearfatal car crash. He has to overcome losing his wife and all his glory. Can he make it back to the top? This movie received 91% on Rotten Tomatoes. “On the Ferrellometer, Talladega Nights sits just above Kicking & Screaming, when it should be redlining it up there with Anchorman.” Dan Jolin Empire 1. The Miracle [PG] When Minnesota College coach Herb Brooks is hired to help the 1980 U.S. men's Olympic hockey team, he leads the team in a new playing stylethe same style as the almighty Soviet team. Herb assembles a team of underdog college allstars, who are humiliated in early matches. Herb Brooks ends up with a team that not only has a group of team members who hate each other (because they are from Minnesota and Boston), they also hate him. How can Herb against all odds
unite his team against a feared foe, the heavily favored Soviet team? As the U.S. team tries to overcome implausible odds and go for the gold medal, the team becomes an example of American patriotism during the Cold War. This movie received 90% on Rotten Tomatoes. “More than just a David vs. Goliath snapshot of the 1980 Winter Olympics, "Miracle" goes for the gold with a personal look at a famous hockey coach and his 20 young dreamers.” Bob Waliszewski Plugged In
Sport Sectio March Madness 2018 Part 2 Again, the upsets keep coming. Again, the high seeds drop one by one. Each game breaks your bracket. Who is left? Sweet Sixteen #9 Kansas State vs. #5 Kentucky: Kansas St. edges out Kentucky in a 6158 upset. #7 Nevada vs. #11 Loyola Chicago: The biggest upset teams of the tourney battle it out, with Loyola winning 6968. #9 Florida St. vs. #4 Gonzaga: After upsetting Xavier, Florida rumbles past ‘Zaga, 7560 for another upset. #3 Michigan vs. #7 Texas A&M: The upset against NC happened, but this time, Michigan takes the win, 9972. #1 Villanova vs. #5 West Virginia: Villanova takes the win, 9078. #3 Texas Tech vs. #2 Purdue: Texas Tech wins in a highseeded upset, 7865. #1 Kansas vs. #5 Clemson: Kansas wins, 8076. #2 Duke vs. #11 Syracuse: Duke wins narrowly, 6965. Elite Eight
#9 Kansas State vs. #11 Loyola Chicago: Loyola Chicago comes away with yet another upset, 7862. #9 Florida St. vs. #3 Michigan: Michigan edges out Florida, 5854. #1 Villanova vs. #3 Texas Tech: Villanova, the number one seed, beats the only Texas team in the tourney left, 7159. #1 Kansas vs. #2 Duke: The other number one seed makes it into the Final Four, in an 8581 win. Final Four #11 Loyola Chicago vs. #3 Michigan: The final Cinderella team loses in a 6957 loss. #1 Villanova vs. #1 Kansas: This will ensure only one #1 seed in the championship, and that will be Villanova with a 9579.
National Championship #1 Villanova vs #3 Michigan The Final in San Antonio Villanova crushes Michigan for their 2nd NCAA title in three years. Top Scorer: VIL: D. DiVincenzo: 31 pts Final Score 7962
FC Dallas Starts The Season Strong FC Dallas has only had three games in the first five weeks, but they played well in the games they played. They brought in some new young talent over the offseason, and those players are starting with strength, as well as the players who were on the team in the previous season. All three of the games have been home games, so they’ve had great support. FC Dallas started at home hosting Real Salt Lake with a close game. Real Salt Lake scored in the twentyfifth minute, and it was 10 for the majority of the game. Maxi Urruti of FC Dallas drove down the field in the eightysixth minute, crossed the ball across the goalmouth, and Marcelo Silva from Real Salt Lake deflected it in for an own goal. The game ended that way, 11, and FC Dallas had a bye the next week. FC Dallas then hosted the defending Western Conference champions, the Seattle Sounders. FCD played strong from the start and Roland Lamah scored in the twentieth minute. Clint Dempsey of Seattle then got a red card in the thirtyseventh minute, and Maxi Urruti took advantage of that by scoring in the fiftyeighth minute. Roland Lamah added another goal to his tally in the sixtythird minute, and the game ended 30 in FC Dallas’ favor. To open another home game against the Portland Timbers, Roland Lamah scored his third goal of the season in the thirtysixth minute, and in the fortyseventh minute, Sebastian Blanco of the Portland Timbers had a beautiful strike to tie the game up 11. In the seventyfifth minute, Lawrence Olum from Portland got a red card, but FC Dallas could not capitalize in the last fifteen minutes and the game ended 11. FC Dallas ended their first five weeks with a bye and will play this Saturday at home again against the Colorado Rapids.
Joke , Riddle , & Comic Sectio Lion Pride Comics
Lion Pride Jokes Jokes NASA sent people into space, but they ran into a little problem... They didn’t have a pen that could write in antigravity. So NASA spent a decade and 12 million dollars to invent a pen that could write in antigravity. The Russians just used a pencil. How do you know when a rhino is about to charge? When he pulls out his credit card. When pigs go camping, what do they stay in? A hog cabin. What do get when a skunk crosses a road blindfolded? Roadkill. A bear walked into a bar and said, “May I have a cookie…………….and a soda?” The bartender said, “Sure, why the big paws?” What animal had the highest IQ on Noah’s Ark? The giraffe. Why are teddy bears never hungry? Because they are always stuffed. What do you call a cow who plays the piano? A moosician What is the sky’s least favorite building? A Skyscraper. Teacher: Stand up if you’re confused.
Nobody stands up. Teacher: I repeat, stand up if anyone’s confused. A kid named Josh stands up. Teacher: Josh, are you really confused? Josh: No ma’am I just thought that you might be lonely ‘cause you’re the only one standing up. Waiter, waiter! This coffee tastes like mud! I’m not surprised, sir, it was ground this morning. A mushroom walks into a restaurant and asks for a drink. Waiter: “No.” Mushroom: “Why not, I’m a Fungi.” Tom, Bob, and Jerry went to a party. After the party, they returned to their hotel. The hotel was 100 stories high. Unfortunately for them, the elevator wasn’t working. They made a plan for the first 50 stories. Tom will crack jokes. The second set of 50 stories Bob will tell a happy story, and lastly, Jerry will tell a sad story. They then started up the steps. After 2 hours it was Jerry's turn. He turned to the other two and said "Ok guys, here's my sad story. I forgot the keys downstairs.” Riddles If you flip a $5 bill ten times, how many times will it land on Abraham Lincoln? Ten, because he’s in a memorial on the other side.
Credits We could not have done this without our sponsor, Mrs. Jenkins, and our writers and editors: Ben Adams Hudson Brown William Clarke Warner Hartnett Henry Hoak Adam Kappelman Raja Mehendale Nathan Meyer Quina Perkinson Baxter PerryMiller Bobby Strauss Sohum Sukhatankar Reed Sussman Tyler Tang Thomas Whitehurst