COVER STORY | F
One yea
One year ago, The ReMarker told the story of three students’ struggles with the Counseling Department over the past year, we caught up with one old
Back on track
Finding techniques to combat his anxiety and depression over the last year, Jake* has found his own ways to make his turnaround a reality.
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Perspectives
The ReMarker • March 11, 2021
14, 15
FALLING APART Students facing mental health struggles suffer in all parts of their life.
rowing up, Jake* never thought he exercise six days a week since the start of this had mental health problems. He year. He sees his physical health as being an never thought he would eventually be integral part of his self-confidence and just as diagnosed with anxiety, moderate depression important as mental health. and OCD. “While I’m exercising, it’s difficult, and Even freshman year after two instances sometimes I just hate it,” Jake said. “But once of self-harming and periods of Has the new schedule I’m done, I feel so much better. I feel feeling completely and totally positively affected your like I pushed myself, and I feel more overwhelmed, Jake moved on, mental health in anyway? confident about my abilities and never thinking much of his pushing myself mentally.” troubles. These workout sessions have It happened again the been greatly helped by the new 24% summer after sophomore year. schedule. Because of the 8:35 But still no acknowledgement a.m. start time, Jake has been No of a deeper issue. able to exercise each morning Yes, some And then junior year before school. And that’s not impact happened. Usually a the only way the new schedule Yes, drastic impact perfectionist, Jake wasn’t has helped Jake out. able to handle the extreme “Even though sometimes 17% workload and the constant it can be confusing, I feel like I 59% demands of school, athletics adjusted to the rotating schedule 1 177 and extracurriculars. Unable to within two weeks of school,” 24 meet his own high expectations Jake said. “It’s a nice change of pace for himself, he began to regress. Social instead of having the same thing every anxiety and self-loathing began to mount. It was single day. And the long free periods are so getting harder and harder to hide the scars, the beneficial.” stress, the emotion . . . until it all came to a head. While the new schedule has been a welcome Jake’s friend reported him to the Counseling change, the outbreak of a global pandemic most Office. certainly has not been. Jake is thankful for the 59close friends he is still able to talk to, but wishes At first, he was scared — scared of what his 59 parents would think, what the counselors would it wasn’t so hard to socialize with the rest of his think, but after he shared his struggles, he felt classmates. a massive weight lift off his chest. He started “I feel like I haven’t been able to connect talking with the counselors more and more with the rest of my grade the way I anticipated about balance and time management, attending I would,” Jake said. “Unfortunately, COVID has weekly therapy sessions and eventually physically and socially distanced everyone sharing his story with close friends 6% 2% 3% from each other.” and teachers. Jake believes that COVID-19 has As his support system grew, certainly contributed to mental so did his resolve to grow as a health problems among the 28% human being, to consistently student body but recognizes that work on his mental wellmental heaalth was an issue Much worse being and help others going long before the pandemic, one Slightly worse through the same thing. that may have flown under the About the same In March of his junior radar. Slightly better year, one year ago, Jake “At an environment like St. Much better shared his story with The Mark’s, there are so many kids ReMarker. Since then, he’s — I know so many kids — who made a lot of progress. He’s have mental health issues, and 61% not perfect, he’ll tell you, but he’s anxiety’s one of the most common more mature, more conscious of ones,” Jake said. “That’s just In your opinion, has St. his feelings and emotions. Mark’s improved its available evident in the way that the school One year later, Jake is still mental health resources for is built. We push ourselves, and fighting. finding balance is difficult.” students in the past year? For anyone dealing with 29 One of the most significant contributors to their own mental health struggles, Jake suggests Jake’s turnaround has been his increased focus getting help, regardless of how big or small one 6 on building deep, meaningful relationships. thinks their mental health problems are. “I started trying to be more social, meet new “For any student who’s seeking some sort people and make a lot of friends,” Jake said. of help, they just need to forgive themselves “I have met a lot of people at St. Mark’s and and try not to downplay whatever they’re going Hockaday, and I think that’s a great way for me through,” Jake said. “Don’t say, ‘I don’t need to to have balance. It’s an outlet for leisure and a see Dr. Bonsu,’ or ‘I can just get through this on relief on weekends when I get to spend time my 60 own.’ Go seek help if you have the slightest with friends. inclination to get it.” Jake has picked up the ability to Overall though, Jake believes the most compartmentalize different aspects of his life important thing is having a support network, over the past year, separating his feelings from and he’s thankful for the people in his own life his responsibilities and obligations. he has been able to lean on when he was going “It was very difficult, but I eventually through tough times. learned that I have to separate my emotions “The surprising thing that I noticed was from the things that I have to do,” Jake said. just how caring and supportive all of the people “Regardless of how I feel on a given day, there around me ended up being,” Jake said. “I are certain things that I have to do. And, yes, if realized how grateful I am for the people that I things get out of control, I can take a break. But have because I know that not everyone has such I have to know the boundary between taking a a strong and supportive social network. But I break just for leisure, for procrastination, versus was lucky to have a bunch of people who cared taking a break for balance.” about me, especially my family, but my friends Jake has also made a commitment to and teachers as well.” STORY Jamie Mahowald, Henry McElhaney, Robert Pou PHOTO Jack Davis
