ETIQUESTIONS

Dr. Barbara Baggerly-Hinojosa

I have several friends who rarely or never drink alcohol and others who enjoy a cocktail or wine with dinner. I am planning a dinner party at my home and I am worried about how to make everyone happy when I entertain. What is the etiquette rule about serving alcohol?

The first thing you want to do is make sure your bar is stocked with a variety of drinks...both alcoholic and non-alcoholic. Make sure to have soft drinks, still and sparking water, tonic, fruit juices, and iced tea on hand. Offer a variety of drinks with the meal. The goal is not to call special attention to guests who do or do not drink alcohol. Provide a wide selection and let each guest choose the drink he/she prefers.

I have been so fortunate to attend many social events this season and I know it is polite to send a thank you card afterwards. However, I am always stuck with what to write. Do you have any advice?

Just do it! The sooner, the better. Write the thank you note as if you were speaking with the person you are thanking. Keep it short and sweet but personalize the note by referring to the event you attended. Finally, always remember that a thank you note is an extra way of telling the person you truly value what has been done for you.

I was recently invited to the home of a friend for a big community event. I noticed that some of the guests arrive with a hostess gift. The event was to promote a local nonprofit, so I was not sure if a hostess gift was necessary or not. When should I bring a hostess gift?

A hostess gift is a lovely way to thank them for their hospitality. It does not have to be elaborate or expensive, but it should always be given when you are invited to someone’s home for an event. Wine, flowers, specialty food items, and small items for the house all make good hostess gifts.