"I remember feeling very alone"

“I remember feeling very alone – but I wasn’t. I was just around the wrong people. Finding those who would accept me and offer help without judgement meant everything and it was a large part of my recovery.”

Growing up, Natasha Benjamin experienced a childhood of domestic abuse and bullying. After being injured in a car crash and losing her job, she contemplated suicide. However, a web search caught her attention and encouraged her to start writing a blog about her experiences with depression. The blog, Free Your Mind, which she began writing in 2013, quickly began gathering followers. It has since become a valuable resource to help support children who have experienced domestic violence and mental illness.

Experiencing traumatic abuse during childhood results in 1 in 3 children developing a mental illness; this is why Free Your Mind delivers online support. Natasha aims to empower children by giving them the tools and resilience to rebuild a sense of self and the knowledge to look after their own happiness and wellbeing.

“When I first started my blog, I had absolutely no idea that this would happen,” says Natasha. “Where we are now blows my mind. It’s also a little scary because I’ve gone far beyond any expectations. I started writing to raise awareness of my experiences and I hoped that I could help others. As a child, I always fantasised about a better life that I could have been living. Daydreaming was my escape and now I am living a life I don’t feel the need to escape from anymore. Even saying this now makes me want to pinch myself because Free Your Mind is a real movement in its own right; raising awareness and really helping others. It’s everything I could have dreamed of.”

The launch of Free Your Mind now sees Natasha play an advocate role for mental health. Her past experiences mean she understands how childhood trauma can manifest itself in later life, and she wants to ensure that the voices of children who have witnessed domestic violence are heard.

Free Your Mind provides children with therapeutic tools such as holistic therapies, mindfulness, cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and Reiki to help them improve their psychological wellbeing. Natasha says that these tools are effective to help them recover from their trauma because “when used together, they encourage co-regulation and for them to learn how to self-soothe. It teaches them about personal safety and gives them the opportunity to share their own voice and experiences.”

Being part of a community is also an important element of Free Your Mind. From group therapy sessions through to the creation of a blogging community and an online Facebook support group, Natasha actively encourages people to come together to share their stories. She says “We are built for connection; to share our experiences together. I remember feeling very alone when I was struggling with the trauma of my childhood experiences. What I realised was that I wasn’t alone. I was just around the wrong people. There was a world of people who shared my experience and would accept, help and not judge me. That meant everything and it formed a large part of my recovery. I really want others to have the same opportunity.”

“When people open up about how they are feeling, I breathe a sigh of relief that they want to share their personal story. After being silenced, they are finally speaking to somebody that they feel can understand them. Having those experiences validated means everything. It’s really humbling to look back over the past few years and think about how many people have trusted me enough to share their stories with me.”

Natasha’s work with Free Your Mind has become so influential that in 2019, she was named “Inspirational Woman of the Year” by TV show Lorraine.

As part of Natasha’s mental health advocacy work, she regularly visits schools to talk to children and young people about how they can take care of their emotional resilience. A core part of this is helping them to understand how social media can have a negative effect on mental health; Natasha has become a prominent campaigner for better social media regulation. When she was at her lowest and gripped by depression, it was only by chance that an inspirational website caught her eye and saved her life. Natasha freely admits that social media has a much more powerful impact upon young people now than it did back in 2012.

When asked why she thinks that social media has evolved to become a negative influence on young people she says: “For years, I’ve been campaigning about social media because I don’t think it’s healthy for us in large doses. Not only is it used without any regulation, but we are continuously exposed to harmful views and news which can impact our mental health.

“I’m quite wary that we are constantly connecting with so many people daily, whilst losing connection to ourselves. Before you check in on social media, make it a habit to check in on yourself first. We are not supposed to be accessible from all these angles, and it has created a lot of stress for people because we are expected to be switched on and available at all times.”

The issues relating to social media and mental health are increasingly documented. Last year, Children’s Commissioner Anne Longfield, called for social media companies to back a statutory duty of care and take more responsibility for what children are able to access online. It’s something that Natasha feels strongly about, and with high profile cases such as 14-year old Molly Russell, who tragically took her own life in 2017 after viewing distressing material on Instagram, she believes we need to focus more efforts educating young people about what is real when it comes to online content.

“We need to talk to young people and ask how they feel about social media. We need to find out if they feel pressure to be involved. It’s not about positioning social media as good or bad, it’s about helping them to understand how they can reduce their time spent online without sounding critical. In my experience, coming from a place of curiosity about how and why they use social media can change the whole conversation.”

The future is looking incredibly strong for Free Your Mind, and Natasha has also developed a series of training workshops for professionals to help them learn more about the practices used by the her team.

“The courses are designed to help professionals support the children they work with, whilst also becoming trauma-informed. This means that they understand the underpinning of what’s behind behaviours, thoughts and feelings of children who have experienced childhood trauma” says Natasha.

Find out more.

If you would like to find out more about Natasha’s training courses, or you would like to refer a child to Free Your Mind, please email info@freeyourmindcic.com or visit freeyourmindcic.com