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The IAM Aims To improve the standard of driving (and riding) on the UK roads. The Advancement of Road Safety.

sam

SOLENT ADVANCED M OTO R C Y C L I S T S

The Administration of an Advanced Test.

MAKING

progress NOT ALL BIKERS ARE HAIRY NOT ALL LADIES ARE NAKED Joanne writes inside on p9.

July 09

INSIDE p4 Chief Observer’s Report

p5 Slow Riding

p6 SAM further training

p10 Customer service

p15 Ciircles in the Sand Photograph by Tom Sloan Registered Charity No. 1097558


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S A M S O L E N T A DVA N C E D M OTO R C Y C L I S T S

July 2009

SAM MERCHANDISE

SAM Polo-Shirts, not only for ‘old’ men! Now available from £15. Various Colours and Sizes available to order, talk to Tom.

Making Progress, the magazine of the Solent Advanced Motorcyclists. Created by Nigel Grace. Edited by David Allen. Artwork by Kim Formhalls. Printed by James Byrne

PA G E 2


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Editor’s Essay After five years Nigel has handed over the reins to me. During that time he raised the level from a grubby piece of paper to a full colour glossy and in recognition of his efforts I propose to drop the term Newsletter and refer to it in future as Making Progress, the SAM Magazine. He told me that it would only take me about an hour a week, with a little flurry of activity as we approached publication. What a load of b… what a load of bo… what a load of bol… what a load of bold and interesting articles you have sent me, everything from one-liners to short stories, everything from prim & proper to really rather rude. Thank you to everyone for everything, you have got me off to a wonderful start and I appreciate your help. I’m just a little apprehensive that I’ll have nothing for next time so please keep it coming, anything you like, any topic you like, and if it’s not already linked to biking we’ll make it up. It annoys me when people say “I’m not very good at English”, I don’t care, ya know wha I mean, Babe, we can sort the English, it’s the input we want. I look forward to hearing from you.

David Allen

July 2009

CHAIRMAN’S

chat

Well, summer is here, and there is no excuse for not getting that bike out and taking it on a few rides. Having just returned from an excellent SAM trip to Germany in the Mosel valley, where twisty bends adorn and the scenery is magnificent, raises the question 'Why do you belong to SAM?' So please, can you take a few minutes to send me an email as to what you expect. Did you join for the social side or the training. What do you like, what do you not like. What would you like us to do in the future, more of the same, or do you have some other ideas? The recent AGM promoted some interesting discussions about the IAM and I would like to let everyone know that I will be serving on the new NRG (National Representatives Group) Committee for the IAM which is a group that will be helping to include the views of the members. Recently, I also attended a Region 2 day where all the car and motorcycle groups came together. It was an extremely informative day and we all learnt a lot about how the other groups operate and the services they offer their members. As I always say, SAM doesn't work without you giving up your valuable time and for that I say a huge thank you to you all. Safe Riding,

Lilian

YOUR COMMITTEE Chairman

Secretary

Treasurer

Vice Chairman & PR

Chief Observer

Membership Secretary

Club Night Organiser

Dr Lilian Hobbs

Paul Nol

John Parvin

David Forster

Alex Gore

Dr Wendy Peters

Peter Curtis

Group Rides Co-ordinator & Website

Skills Manager

Rui de Castro

Dr Lilian Hobbs

Further Skills Administrator

MDU Manager

Gerry Gooch

Tim Bennett

Merchandising

Magazine Editor

Tom Weise

David Allen

Officers, Committee Members and Helpers OFFICERS Chairman:

Dr Lilian Hobbs

Magazine Editor:

David Allen

Secretary:

Paul Nol

Website:

Rui de Castro

Treasurer:

John Parvin HELPERS SAM Sunday Co-ordinator

Becci Lunn

Vice Chairman

David Forster

SAM Sunday Co-ordinator

James Norman

Public Relations:

David Forster

SAM Sunday Breakfast

Anne Spicer

Chief Observer:

Alex Gore

Club Night Refreshments:

James Norman

Membership Secretary:

Dr Wendy Peters

Club Night Refreshments:

Becci Lunn

Club Night Organiser

Peter Curtis

Slow Riding:

Alec Gore

Group Rides Co-ordinator:

Rui de Castro

Magazine Publishing:

Kim Formhalls

Skills Manager:

Dr Lilian Hobbs

MDU Towing

Jack Laverick

Further Skills Administrator:

Gerry Gooch

Social Events:

James Norman

Merchandising:

Tom Weise

Raffle Seller

Jen Hargreaves

MDU Manager:

Tim Bennett

COMMITTEE MEMBERS

PA G E 3


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S A M S O L E N T A DVA N C E D M OTO R C Y C L I S T S

July 2009

Wendy Welcomes

FOR SALE 2005/05 BMW R1150R

41 new members since March to the beginning of June John Longland, a new Observer Tim Redfearn David Kendall Tim Morton Heather Durrant Rodney Griffin Alan Wright Patricia Stevens Gary Ashton David Whymark Les Leithes Phillip Scott

Morag Scott George Hill Nicole Davey Jon Pardoe Margaret Duckett Stephen Wood Ivan Waters Matthew Goodsell Mark Allman David Duckett Graham Clarke Ian Bailey Shaun Worrasll Stephen Miles

Miles Waterman Christopher Pine Nicholas Powler Andrew Barber Geoffrey Tourle Mark Ryder Alasdair Mcdowell Alan Mehlin Alan Whitehead Brian Peacock Russ Clark Alasdair Smith Geoff Metcalfe Alan Jones

Dr. Wendy Peters

CHIEF OBSERVER’S REPORT Ju n e 0 9 Over the last three months we have had 41 new Associates join SAM which is truly fantastic. During that same period we have had a total of 9 people pass their Advanced Test which, again, is a great achievement. Now, I don’t profess to be a brilliant mathematician, but even I can work out that there is a slight imbalance there. I suffer from 2 common complaints. New Associates query why they are not placed with an Observer more quickly and Observers complain that they constantly suffer with what we call ‘inactive’ Associates – those people who, once assigned, fail to commence observed rides or fail to continue

Low saddle option, thus suitable for ladies as well, and with screen. Panniers, hugger, hand guards. Taxed and with MOT until May 2010. Asking price is £3800. Call Roger during the evening on 02380 553317

FOR SALE 2004 APRILIA RSVR

regular meetings with their Observer. There are myriad reasons why Associates don’t start, or fail to continue with regular rides, but we can all see that the numerical imbalance I mentioned above is not favourable to anyone. Enough said. You can all work out the principle here... To ease the situation, we now have 3 new Trainee Observers. John Hardman, Tom Weise and Phil Ayling and thanks to them for wishing to put something back into the Club. Unfortunately, I have to report that Peter Johnson has retired from Observing. Peter has been a Senior Observer for many years and has been an absolute stalwart for SAM and will be sadly missed. Many thanks to Peter for all his past work.

David Spicer

WANTED... Sports Correspondent I’m looking for someone with an interest in the sporting aspects of biking to help me with the magazine. I just need significant dates and details to go in the Diary, eg WSB, local motocross, and if you want to write a line or two on winners and losers so much the better. This is a tax free position. Contact David Allen on SAM-Magazine@ntlworld.com PA G E 4

In very good condition with only 20,000 miles on the clock.

12,000 miles, 5000 of which were ridden by me.

The bike has a Full Service History and 9 months MOT & Tax

2 owners from new – I bought the bike 2½ years ago.

The bike is in Very Good Condition. The back brake follows the Aprilia tradition of being feeble and there is a scratch on the swing arm, but apart from that it’s very clean!

Double bubble screen and Cat 1 alarm & immobiliser fitted.

Soft luggage and carry rack also available to purchase if you want them.

Asking price is £4,100. I would be happy to receive any sensible offers from a SAM member / associate If you want more information, please contact me, Logan Colbeck, on: 07905 158584 or via email logan.colbeck@yahoo.co.uk


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S A M S O L E N T A DVA N C E D M OTO R C Y C L I S T S

July 2009

SLOW RIDING By Alec Gore

owever, this does not mean we are sitting back and not reflecting on how the course can benefit members further. There are two categories of rider who could get still more from the sessions:

H

1. Riders who are basically "beginners" when it comes to Slow Riding, or those who are particularly less confident than they should expect to be; and 2

Riders who are competent at Slow Riding, but who would like to stretch their skills to a level consistent with all other aspects of their Advanced Riding.

Therefore, from now on, SAM Slow Riding Training will be divided into two levels: LEVEL 1 This is for "beginners" or people whose Observer believes that they would benefit substantially from developing their Slow Riding skills. It will concentrate on:

Everyone seems very happy with the way the Slow Riding Training has been received over the last two years. The course format has proved to be fun, comprehensive, and has given a great deal of opportunity to learn and build confidence for many riders.

Slow Riding tips by can be found on the SAM website. From some people’s experience on the last Slow Riding Training, these are worth another look, in particular those things I shout at you that you take home and dream about .... RELAX! Relax – your mind, feel comfortable on your bike; it’s your friend and can do whatever you want it to. Remember many people of all sizes and abilities have already done what you are aiming to do. You can do it too! Relax – your body, especially your arms at the elbows; the more relaxed you are, the more feedback you get from the bike and the more likely your inputs will be smooth.

clutch) and giving small measured inputs on the throttle. Think in three stages when using the controls: Gently apply the acceleration or the braking and note the bike’s response, i.e. whether there is any likelihood of losing traction through wheel spin or skidding. Then increase the control firmly, but smoothly to get the job done. Finally, before reaching desired speed or desired stopping point, ease off so there is no sudden change in momentum. All of this makes for a smoother, more comfortable ride and keeps the bike properly under control, with less mechanical wear and tear. LET GO OF THE CLUTCH (OR BRAKE)!

front wheel to take. This means turning your head on your neck and looking behind you! You go where you look; if your eyes just follow the front wheel, you will draw too large a circle and not make the turn. ROLL IT ON! ROLL IT ON! Your throttle is your best friend in turning. Through experiencing the exercises, you will be able to tip the bike into a turn quite dramatically and then roll on the throttle to cause the bike to pick itself up again. Once you get the confidence to find this point of balance, it’s a wonderful feeling: Look where you want to go; tip the bike into the turn by lifting the opposite bar (or pushing the same

SQUEEZE, DON’T GRAB!

a: Confidence in the feel of the motorcycle at slow speed, including when braking and steering. b: Accurate starting and stopping. c: Basic left and right turns from a stopped position and the 'U' turn. LEVEL 2 This is for members who have already attended a Slow Riding Training or are reasonably confident already, but would like to have more time to develop these skills: a: Figure-of-eight. b: Slalom. c: Look, Lean and Roll (i.e. cornering under power) exercise. d: Brake and steer exercise. The July 2009 course will be a Level 1 Course and the September 2009 course will be a Level 2 Course. In 2010, we will aim to run two Level 1 and two Level 2 courses.

What happens if you grab a handful instead of squeezing ... Whatever control you are using, remember always to squeeze, not grab. Gently roll on the throttle and gently ease it off. Gently squeeze on the front brake and let it off and be especially gentle with the rear brake; roll your foot onto it, don’t stab at it. Make sure you instinctively know where the biting point is on your clutch. If you are an experienced rider, this should be easy for you. Knowing where to hold the clutch so the bike is not free-wheeling, but the rear wheel is not fully engaged to the engine is very important. You can then control your speed by holding the biting point constant (i.e. slipping the

“Come on! Close up!” Another rider discovers she can do more than she ever thought. Less is more – avoid too many inputs all at once. Feel for the response you get from each input and adjust accordingly. If you can ride with only using the throttle for control, do that. Until you have built up experience, resist the temptation to be slipping the clutch, using various combinations of both brakes and the throttle all at the same time.

side bar under the turn); then at the apex, roll on the power and feel the rear wheel push into the ground, lifting the bike up again. This process is commonly known as “Look-Lean-Roll.”

LOOK AT THE CONE! When doing U-turns or Figuresof-eight, look where you want the bike to end up; don’t just look at the path you think you want the

“Yes, your bike will do it!” Alec gives a demo pillion ride. PA G E 5


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July 2009

SAM FURTHER TRAINING COURSE The SAM Further Training is provided for those SAM members who require a `Refresher` or for those who wish to go one step further to enhance their current riding skills. The course culminates in the SAM Advanced Plus Test that is conducted by a Police Class 1 rider. You will start off with 100 points and then lose a point for each weakness shown. An IAM pass is equivalent to 66%

You can see that it is a very stiff test and it is not expected that many will get a 1st class pass.The course costs £30.00 plus the normal contribution to your Observers motorcycle running costs of £10.00 for each run that you have. The courses are conducted by three of our SAM Senior Observers, Dave Bruguier, Steve Clothier, and Gerry Gooch, and have been so popular that there is waiting list at the present time. Details can be seen on the SAM Website. Under `Documents` you will find Doc number 015GG (two sheets).

SAM Advanced Plus 3rd class is 66 - 75% 2nd 76 - 85%

Gerry Gooch

1st 86 - 100%

SAM Further Training Administrator

Death Look or Look of Death By David Spicer This is my bit of fun. The bit where I give my opinion on some ‘advanced riding’ stuff, and today I feel like being a tad controversial. I’m going to ‘attack’ one of the mainstays of safe riding. One of the procedures it’s almost heresy to criticise, let alone question. I’m going to have a go at the good old Lifesaver! What an emotive term that is – Lifesaver – wow, it must be important, it saves lives! Before some of you swoon at my audacity, let me say it’s not the principle of using it that I question, it’s the massive overuse some riders subject it to. It’s the fact that many riders believe doing frequent Lifesavers is, somehow, an indication of a true Advance Rider. It’s doing it by rote which I hate. And I hate it because it can have an adverse effect on our safety. A couple of years ago I was following a serving Police Officer on his bike. Every single time he even slightly changed direction he used a Lifesaver. I have to say it was beautifully constructed and was poetry in motion and he certainly was a first class rider, but why was he doing it? He later explained it was a ‘demonstration’ ride that he would normally give to an Associate. And, although I didn’t say so at the time, I considered this to be a rubbish explanation. If he wouldn’t normally do it himself, why encourage a novice to do it?

PA G E 6

A few weeks ago I was conducting a CBT for a father and son and I was explaining at length that there are times when we must look into our ‘blind spot’. I then asked if either of them knew what, in motorcycling parlance, we call this look over our shoulder. The boy thought long and hard and then blurted out, ‘Death look’. Although his response was obviously amusing, I then thought – this lad is on to something. The vast majority of Lifesavers are executed on the move and the basic action is to turn our heads to look backwards whilst we are moving forwards. Now this strikes me as quite ridiculous. The last place I want to be looking is behind me when I’m travelling forwards, particularly when I’m approaching some hazardous situation – which is generally when the Lifesaver is performed. And because the concept is not without some danger, it should only ever be done when it’s absolutely the safest thing to do at the time and only when there is some doubt over what’s lurking there that could be a threat. Never because it simply looks good or because it’s what someone expects us to do. I shudder when I see learner riders in convoy, all doing completely unnecessary Lifesavers. Their

biggest danger is running in the back of the rider in front, not the fictitious object snuggled up in their blind spot. The Lifesaver is an enigma. If the movement is performed well it appears to complement the Advanced Rider. And all the unnecessary ones still become acceptable because it’s widely considered to be a natural function of Advanced skills. And all the time

it’s a dangerous being. It lulls us into thinking it’s not without risk. What I’m saying is we should treat the holy Lifesaver with contempt. Beware the Lifesaver. It can hurt us. It can be a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Heed my warning - only ever do it when there is doubt and never because we think it looks good. See – I told you I would be controversial...

Skills Training By Lilian Hobbs Its been a busy time for everyone wishing to improve their riding skills. With light evenings there is plenty of time to practise and go out on Observed runs. he evening theory classes have been very well attended and one of our local examiners was a contributor on one of the May evenings. It is highly recommended that all Associates should attend the two theory classes as it will really help your observers and give you more time riding, rather than learning the theory.

T

The Slow Riding courses have been very popular and we have decided to change the format of these events and there will now be a Level 1 and a Level 2 course.This is explained in more detail by Alec Gore’s contribution on page 5. Due to the popularity of these course and the strict security measures at HMS Collingwood, please can I ask that cancellations are kept to a minimum. Of course I understand that sometimes there are circumstances beyond your control and for those I quite understand. I do have to supply the list of names to security and I don't like turning people away. The last 2 courses I have run, revised lists have been sent less than 24 hrs and I know from personal experience when I forgot to include my own name on the list that they won't let you in unless your name is on the list I supply. Bike Maintenance evening with J2 Honda, date should be announced soon. Bike Handling event also to be announced very soon.


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SAM DIARY OF EVENTS FOR 2009 We are pleased to include any events that may be of interest to any of our members. It is recognised that you may have interests other than biking, or indeed be looking for another interest to provide another challenge, which could

provide you with a destination for your weekend bimble round the lanes. That is how one member unexpectadely found himself getting off his bike and into a gyrocopter, and ended up with a huge cheesy grin. Who does what?

JULY Tues 14 SAM Club Night SGCC 7.30pm Sun 19 SAM Group Ride Woolacombe, North Devon Ower, Early Moto GP Sachsenring Germany Thurs 22 Riders for Health Day of Champions Donnington Park Sun 26 SAM Group Ride See website Loomies Moto GP Donnington Park WSB Round 10 Czech Republic Tues 28 SAM Evening Group Ride Winchester & Fareham 7.00pm AUG Sun

2

Thurs 6 Tues 11 Sun 16 Sun Tues Sat Sun

SEPT Sun

Tues Wed Sat Sun Wed Fri Sat Sun

23 25 29 30

6

8 9 12 13 16 18 19 20

Tues 22 Sun 27

OCT Sun

SAM Sunday, Breakfast with Anne, Assessed rides SGCCFrom 10.00 Leisurely Group Ride Who Knows where with Alan Culshaw 12.00 Bulldog Bash Shakespeare County Raceway SAM Club Night SGCC 7.30pm SAM Group Ride See website Wickham Moto GP Czech Republic SAM Group Ride See website Ower SAM Group Ride Ride Winchester & Fareham 7.00pm BSB Caldwell Park SAM Group Ride See website Loomies Moto GP Indianapolis SAM Sunday, Breakfast withAnne, Assessed rides SGCC From10.00 Leisurely Group Ride SGCC 12.00 Moto GP Misano Spain WSB Round 11 Germany SAM Club Night, Bikesafe. SGCC 7.30pm SAM Theory Class SGCC 7.30pm Slow Riding HMS Collingwood 10.00am SAM Group Ride See website Winchester SAM Theory Class SGCC 7.30pm Goodwood Revival BMF Tail-end Show Peterborough SAM Group Ride See website Wickham Moto GP Hungary SAM Evening Group Ride Winchester & Fareham 7.00pm SAM Group Ride See website Ower WSB Round 12 Italy

WANTED... Distributors Needed Can you help SAM distribute flyers and the magazine to the dealers and shops in your area please? We cover a huge area along the South Coast, with members from Hayling to Bournemouth and extending north almost to Basingstoke, something approaching 1000 square miles, so if you could help we’d be very grateful. The ideal arrangement would be that each person only had to cover their local area four times in the year to drop off the magazine and a few leaflets at the same time, or as required. This would give you the chance to get to know the dealers (so that you no longer have to ask for discount). If you would like to help SAM in a practical way at a time to suit yourself this is a super way to do it. All you need to do is to contact David Forster by email in the first instance to register your interest, and he will then contact you to sort out which dealers you could cover and also ensure that there are no unnecessary overlaps. (ad.forster@virgin.net)

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SAM Sunday, Breakfast with Anne, Assessed rides SGCC Leisurely Group Ride SGCC Moto GP BSB Sun 11 SAM Group Ride See website BSB Tues 13 SAM Club Night SGCC Fri/Sat 16/17th Observer Training Weekend Sun 18 SAM Group Ride See website Moto GP Sun 25 SAM Group Ride See website WSB Moto GP

Winchester Australia Wickham Portugal Malaysia

Tues 10 Sun 15 Sun 22 Thurs 26 Sun 29

SAM Group Ride See website SAM Group Ride See website Moto GP SAM Club Night SGCC SAM Group Ride See website SAM Group Ride See website Motorcycle Show Birmingham SAM Group Ride See website

Ower Loomies Spain 7.30pm Winchester Ower 26 Nov – 6 Dec Loomies

Sun Tues Sun Sun Sun

SAM Group Ride See website SAM Club Night SGCC SAM Group Ride See website SAM Group Ride See website SAM Group Ride See website

Winchester 7.30pm Wickham Ower Loomies

NOV Sun Sun

DEC

From 10.00 12.00 Portugal France Loomies TBA 7.30pm

1 8

6 9 13 20 27

Winchester Ower Wickham SGCC Fareham

King Alfred’s Statue MacDonalds Car Park The Square Sarisbury Green Community Centre Sainsburys Car Park

Website www.Solent-Advanced-Motorcyclists.co.uk

They Walk Among Us! One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when I said "Look at that dead bird!" Everyone looked up at the sky and said "Where"?

JCB Motorcycle Services Honda • Kawasaki • Suzuki • Yamaha • Triumph • Scooters & Other Brands Recovery, Fault Tracing, Servicing, Electrics, Diagnostics & Alarms fitted. Door to door service covering the south of England. Stakes Road, Purbrook.

T: 02392 232000 M: 07805 720235 www.jcbmotorcycleservices.co.uk PA G E 7


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Weekly Commute to the Honda 500 that I had done my test on is putting it mildly. Very heavy, noisy (but what a sound!), big. I was smitten and just had to have it. Some three years later, the bike is now very much a tourer. Hard luggage, higher grips – my back couldn't cope with the original riding position, and a high screen.

by Scott Turobin-Harrington

Image the scene. Having spent the week working away from home I had spent Friday looking longingly out of the office window watching the pigeons scrapping with the odd squirrel and thinking how early can I get away with leaving work. I have returned to biking some three years ago having found that I had the cash to be able to afford a bike and a car. It wasn't long before we had got rid of one of our cars. The truth is that I wrote off my wife's car – not the best thing to do, but in my defence it wasn't my fault, honest! And I am now permanently on the bike. My chosen weapon is a Triumph Daytona 900. I had a fantastic opportunity presented to me at work and having just passed my test I jumped onto the “beast” and rode it round the car park. To say that it was a very different ride

RMS Car Repairs B's Garage, Calshot Southampton, SO45 1BE

Phone 023 80891046

Anyway, at 3pm I build up the confidence to log off the infernal work generator and try to slink out of work! Never easy when most of the bosses know my bike and can hear it from 4,000 miles away! Still, donning my gear, gortex this and that, heated gloves, crash helmet etc. I disappear out of the back door to where the “beast” (locally known as the Blue Trumpet) is parked. She starts first time. Just as well considering the amount of work that a mate of mine and I have done to her recently – more of that another day. Now for the fun. Starcom1 connected, iPod set up with a decent amount of tracks – Pink Floyd, Stereophonics, Muse! my sons have been downloading tracks again! I set off from the south coast. First I have to negotiate the M27 heading east. Ultimate destination, Kent. Blast along amongst the other commuters in their tin boxes, avoiding the white vans and the lorries. In truth I could take the back roads A32 but this can be quite busy at this time of the day with only a few overtaking opportunities. However, I had decided to use the M27 tonight and

Bookings by phone for all your MOT needs 2, 3, & 4 wheels Class 1 & 2 Motorcycles class 3, Trikes & Reliants etc. class 4, cars and vans up to 3000kg

Motor Cycle MOTs £25 to SAM members on production of membership card (normal price £28)

email rmscarrepairs@tiscali.co.uk

www.rmscarrepairs.co.uk PA G E 8

July 2009

I can already feel the cold chill on my feet – I have never been able to solve the “cold feet” issue and am too broke to afford heated socks! I head towards the A3(M). The M27 junction with the A3 is always nuts. It is ridiculously simple. Too simple for some, obviously. 4 lanes, inside 2 go to the A3, outer 2 continue on the M27. So, why do people always leave it the last possible moment to make a decision! Its not like the council has forgotten to put up sign's, it may be that there are so many signs that drivers get into a sign overload situation. I always have to up the concentration levels here. Phew, managed to get onto the A3 without too much hassle. Moving up the A3(M) I end up forced to stay in the outside lane. This works providing you are not being chased down by some 4 wheeled German thing! Then it comes to decision time. Do I need

My chosen weapon is a Triumph Daytona 900. I had a fantastic opportunity presented to me at work and having just passed my test I jumped onto the “beast” . to get home quickly, or with little brian effort? If so then I don't turn off onto the A272 (Bikers heaven) and slowly build up the expectation to do battle with the other M25 warriors. So, A272 it is then. A smile spreads across my face, although no one can see it. I can only think that driving a car was never like this. First bend at the junction from the A3 to the A272 starts a completely different journey. A fast, tight sweeping S bend which often results in the right peg grounding (much to the astonishment of the VW Golf that is failing to keep up!). Now for the rest of the journey. Fast sweeping road, bend after bend. Overtake opportunities abound :-). Playing with cars is all part of the fun. Watching for any opportunity particularly at Midhurst. Slow down more than usual to create a descent gap from the cars in front. The next stretch is without doubt the best part of the trip. Tight twisting hilly. What more can I say – only real snag is the curse of “Double White Lines”. They do have their place and are definitely needed here – a number of really bad crashes have happened. But this is superb biking

country, Stereophonics playing on the comms system. Laptop in the top box and mobile phone all but turned off. But then there even more fun to be had, can I cope with all of this! The rush of seeing a sweeping road ahead, traffic is but an inconvenience that can be dispensed with easily. Hah, so glad that I am not in a car! Eventually the fun is curtailed with dual carriageways leading to the M23. North to the M25. Borring, borring. But, what’s this? Friday night congestion! More fun. More concentration required for filtering. Waving to the generous and cursing (in my helmet) at those that aren't. This reminds me of a trip earlier in the year in similar circumstances, except that the bikes that were filtering at the time had a fully liveried police BMW in the lead. Almost like mosses! Shame that he wasn't around tonight. However, cold feet start to annoy but Muse has just kicked in on the iPod. I have to watch my speed now. Filtering is a dodgy sport and I have been fortunate so far. Watch for the gaps in the traffic, taxi drivers, white van and the worst, continental drivers. It seems to be there personal mission to stop motorbikes from filtering! At last, Clackets lane comes up. Do I stop for a ridiculously expensive cup of tea or press on? I don't even bother to move out of the bikers lane (between lanes 2 and 3) and press on to the M27. Another junction where cars wait for the last minute. I have lost count of the number of times that I have seen cars reversing up the M27 to go down the M25! Who designed that junction! Give him an award! The M27 turns almost instantly into the Lorries race track. Overtakes at a lightening 60.000005 mph. I think the record has been 8 miles to achieve an overtaking manoeuvre. Well done, old chap. Now heading for the M20 towards Maidstone. One of the most boring roads so far. The have added new gantries with Cameras recently to increase the excitement for us bikers! Still, Detling Hill beckons. The rest of the journey is almost done on autopilot. The bike and I have been doing this journey for 3 years now and I am sure that it knows the way. We have our own slot at the pumps near to home. You know that you have been doing this too often when the garages in the area know you personally and automatically give you a VAT receipt even though you haven't asked for it. More later. In the meantime, keep your wheels on the black stuff.


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First time for everything “Well hop on”, said my boyfriend, Mark. I gingerly placed one foot on the foot peg and swung the other leg over his mechanical steed. “I’ll take it easy”, he reassured me. The skin around his eyes wrinkled. I knew, even though his helmet covered his mouth, that he was smiling. ark was helping me remove another adventure from my list of ‘things to do’. I couldn’t back out now. I had never ridden on a motorbike. “Nice girls don’t ride motorbikes”, I had heard my mother say numerous times during my adolescence. Now at the tender age of 33, with my “nice girl” days a dim and distant memory, I was willing to risk my reputation and ride on Mark’s 600cc Suzuki Bandit.

M

This moment was not without its planning. Despite being a rebel in training, I was still very conscious that wearing the correct clothes could mean the difference between life and death on the open road. Naively picturing myself clad in tight black leather, with a shock of red curls cascading around my shoulders, I visited my local bike shop. “Right, you are going to need a pair of these”, scoffed the prepubescent shop assistant, as he launched me towards the changing room with several pairs of trousers

and matching jackets. “They’re all made in Italy”, he said jovially, as if this was supposed to compensate for their extortionate price tag. We soon discovered that even the smallest size in the shop was far too large for my petite frame. Despondently I left empty-handed. Some weeks later, in an effort to ignite my enthusiasm, Mark took me

to the Beaulieu Motorcycle World. An extensive search through the sale rails uncovered an extra small leather jacket and a pair of children’s biker trousers, all for the princely sum of £60. Behind a floral curtain in a makeshift changing room, I admired my new biker-chick persona in the cracked piece of mirror. Not quite the Olivia Newton John look that I had imagined, more like a scaled down Michelin man, but nonetheless a reasonable solution to my problem. “Remember, you have to lean with the bike”, Mark said. “Don’t try and sit upright.” Praying that this would come naturally, because I didn’t have the first idea what he meant, I nodded. The chance to ask further questions was snatched away from me as the bike let out a rasping snarl and sprung into life. Mark edged his way to the end of my drive and swung the bike onto the road. I gripped the straps on his jacket tightly. The sensation of being unprotected by the metal shell of my vehicle was foreign to me. The presence of the grey tarmac passing beneath me was terrifying. What was going to stop me flying off the back? As we picked up speed, I

July 2009

By Joanne Moody closed my eyes. This only made things worse as it reacquainted me with unpleasant memories of being pinned back against my seat on the Infusion roller coaster at Blackpool. Then we came to a roundabout. Panic engulfed me as I remembered too late, I was supposed to lean. Despite my delayed response, Mark skilfully manoeuvred us round the corner. My mouth felt dry. I tried to relax but the unfamiliar noises as he worked the gears caught me unaware every time. Finally it was over, Mark stopped the engine and I cautiously dismounted. “Did you enjoy it?”, he asked apprehensively, aware of my bemused expression and uncharacteristic silence. I have to admit that my first time was not my best, but then I understand that is typical in many situations. However, on this occasion I decided to reserve judgement and I’m glad I did because now I love riding on Mark’s bike with him. Feelings of fear have been replaced with those of freedom and exhilaration as I have become more in tune with the bike and my pilot. So much so that there is a new addition to my life – a motorbike. But I’ll tell you about that another time.

RIDING TIPS

Ranting Now whilst we are undergoing IPSY-TIPSY procedures to help us become advanced riders what else are we learning? The procedures by acronym are all very well but the little things can be just as important, things like eye contact, consideration, tolerance, acknowledgement, gratitude. When we are out we should be considerate to others, giving signals even when none are demanded, tolerant of kids on scooters, acknowledging the driver that pulled over to let us pass just by lifting the fingers, gratitude that the major mistake you saw wasn’t yours. But why do so many of you switch off all these things with the engine?

If you push the bars left, the bike goes left. If you push the bars right, the bike goes right. That is, unless you continue pushing the bars all the way, then the bike will go down.

Each club night David calls out the names of those that have progressed through the test to become advanced riders, and is met with a thunderous silence. They haven’t bothered to turn up; they have lost all consideration of the effort that has gone into making them advanced riders; they have not acknowledged that there is a large team behind their Observer organising, accounting, administering, serving tea; they have no gratitude for the manhours of their Observer, and others, that it has taken for them to become advanced at negligible cost. They will gladly pay a mechanic £40 an hour to oil their bike but begrudge the Observer a £10 contribution. These people may have passed an Advanced Test but without the decency to turn up to graciously accept the certificate and the congratulations of their peers they are not in my book Advanced Riders. Without thanking the team that got them to that level they are certainly not Gentlemen Riders nor Lady Riders.

Ranting Rider

PA G E 9


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July 2009

Customer Service? By one of our members who wishes to remain anonymous. I went to Portsmouth Motorcycles, the Honda main dealer for a switch for the bike. Now in this dealer the Parts and Accessories are upstairs and you have to walk through all the bikes to get there. That is fairly normal, but from there it goes downhill rapidly. he showroom appeared to be empty, nobody at Reception, no salesmen, and nobody greeted me with a smile or a Good Morning, but at the back sitting at a desk at the foot of the stairs was the owner (subsequently identified as not being the owner) who completely ignored me. Now I’m not a size 10 petite female, I’m more the shape that makes the room go dark when I cross in front of the window.

T

Proceeding to the Parts Counter I was greeted by raised eyebrows, and I stated that I wanted switch for a Pan. Four and a half minutes later the guy looked at me and said “I can’t find it on the computer, do you know where it is fitted?” Well, at least someone had finally spoken to me, and I suggested that as it was

called a Neutral Switch there may be a clue there that it could be somewhere near the gearbox. I was impressed by his technical training and product knowledge. Having identified the part he told me the price and I asked for my usual discount, to which he replied that he had already given me a discounted price. Having done my homework I told him that this was the retail price offered by all dealers and was not discounted at all. He then asked why I should get any discount and I politely (still) told him a couple of reasons. He then informed me that he was under no obligation to offer me any discount at all, and that if he did he would be in trouble with his boss. He continued to say that as I

had done nothing for them (the Dealership) he wasn’t going to do anything for me. I said that I was amazed at his attitude and it sounded to me as though his customer service policy was “Take the money and **** the customer” to which he replied

“Sounds about right”. To be fair I know that not all their staff should be tarred with the same brush, but would you return to buy anything, let alone spend several thousand pounds on a bike, from Portsmouth Honda?

This report was given to Portsmouth Honda who responded: I have been asked to comment, about an individuals personal recollection, of a visit to my Portsmouth Dealership to purchase a spare part. Having read the article in disbelief, on its inaccuracies and obvious lack of previous knowledge of myself and my dealership, I spoke to the members of staff mentioned in it, only to be informed of a totally different scenario than is portrayed. Despite what the article says, I was not in the dealership at the time, but prefer now, to leave it to people who do now us to form their own opinion of the article, those who do not know us are more than welcome to pay us a visit, if only for a free coffee and a chat, so then they can also form their own opinion. Meanwhile. best regards to everybody, ride safely, keep the shiny side up and see you all soon. Fred Watson, Managing Director, Portsmouth Motorcycle Co Ltd

Spannerman Speaks Is your bike faulty? I walked in on my spannerman when he was filling in a form. Being nosey I said “Wassat?”, to which he replied “Don’t even ask”. ou get that feeling, don’t you, just from the tone of the voice that all is not well, that someone is not necessarily the happiest man in the world, and that perhaps ‘they’ have upset him.

Y

Did you know that the police are empowered to require you to get your bike checked if they believe that it is not roadworthy? Now for some things that seems quite reasonable. It is easy to see if a light is not working; it is either on or it is off, or it is not flashing when it should be or it is flashing when it shouldn’t be, but there is little doubt about its legality. Some other things are a matter of opinion, such

P A G E 10

as the loudness of an exhaust, and guess who is going to win that argument. Whether the policeman is technically qualified to assess the legality or safety in those situations is another discussion, so let’s assume it’s a non-working tail light, costing a pound or two. You will receive a Form which says you must correct the fault and take it to an authorised MOT Tester to have the correction of the fault verified. My spannerman is an authorised person, and depending on who approached him, and how, he sometimes didn’t charge for signing the Form, and sometimes he charged a fiver. MOT man doing

MOT work so no VAT. Pay your fiver and push off. Then the police complained to VOSA that to most people £5 was easily affordable and not really any punishment. Hang on, since when did the police not only hand out punishments on a matter of opinion but also determine the severity of the punishment? (Another argument in the bar, we’ll be here all night). So VOSA have now instructed Spannerman (who is an independent mechanic running his own business) that he WILL charge a minimum of £10.00, and as it is a check on behalf of the police it is not part of the MOT so it is therefore a VATable charge. Have you guessed yet where all this money is going? So no more favours for friends, no more fivers, it is now attracting all

the VAT accounting that goes all the way down the line keeping loads in employment checking on others meeting targets. Do you remember when the copper used to say get your light fixed and then come to the station to show it to me. Ah, progress, isn’t it wonderful?

Excuse me, Sir, but do you know that one of your brake lights isn ’t working? Thank you, Offi cer, but can you clearly see that it isn’t working? Yes, Sir, I can see very clearly that it isn’t work ing. In that case, O fficer, I’d like to report a stolen caravan.

Thank you Rog er


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July 2009

MDU Report

S A M S O L E N T A DVA N C E D M OTO R C Y C L I S T S

The MDU has started it's summer outings and has been to a two day event hosted by Loomies and Bahnstormers,

and more recently to Portsdown Hill on the 31st May. Both events were blessed with sunshine, were well received, and increased our profile within the local biking areas. Unfortunately the Portsdown Hill outing had to be cut short due to lack of helpers, but it did clash with the racing at Thruxton, the Germany getaway holiday, and Mark Sabins run!!! Hmmm, just a little competition methinks.

a "FREE OBSERVED RUN" Hopefully after that they will sign up for the Skills for Life Package. The next event will be Beaulieu Bike Day on the 9th August. Bikers can get in FREE if they register their bikes’ first, and it is hoped that SAM may have a ride out on the day and arrive en masse.

So if you would like to help at Beaulieu, or at any future venues, please let me know. It would also be Anybody is more than welcome to come along to nice to see more ladies coming forward to help out help hand out leaflets and explain about SAM. Even on the stand, mainly to show other female riders if you can only pop by for half an hour the moral that SAM is not all male orientated and caters for support will be appreciated and you may get to meet all. some of the members with whom you don’t Tim Bennett normally come into contact. Our main aim is to get bikers to come along on the SAM Sunday and have MDU Coordinator. P A G E 11


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July 2009

Congratulations to Grandad Well, you have to take the mickey out of the Old Fella occasionally, don’t you? And it really does give me pleasure to do it for an auspicious event.

Clocks in stock.

He can be so enthusiastic about things, he can be so pleased with his achievements, he takes the greatest pleasure in even the simple things in life, and he absolutely loves it when he scores one over me (which I regret to say is often). But he is also quite a craftsman with his hands, and put his skills to good use to build a clocktower. This, he told me, was to be a Garden Feature to enhance his estate, but his wife, Sheila, told me that as he was getting on a bit it was really so that he didn’t miss his bedtime. Nobody seems to know whether it is used once a day or twice. There is a saying that fathers know a lot but Grandads know everything, and although he rattles and prattles on a bit it seems it could be true in this case. Three Associates Fred Nesbitt-Bell, Peter Curtis, and Mark Snowden under the Old Fella’s tutelage passed their tests to become Advanced Motorcyclists on consecutive days. Three passes in three days, not bad going. Well Done Gerry, you deserve to be congratulated. P A G E 12

WANTED..... Run Leader, Back Marker, Reporter, Photographer. Contact Rui (ruid71@yahoo.com)


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July 2009

The National Road Rally ‌ and others. A Response by Jon Cox to the National Road Rally Report in the last edition of Making Progress. t was an interesting write up on the National Road Rally. I have also competed in this for a number of years and thoroughly enjoyed it. Last year we took it easy and did the Daytime Rally which saw us at home enjoying a cold beer by 11pm!

I

The 2006 start at Welshpool

If you like the sound of the National, then its worth noting that there is also a Welsh National Rally (10th May), a Scottish National Rally (early September) and the Round Britain Rally (Easter / 1st April until end of October). If you complete the National Road Rally, Welsh and Scottish in a calender year then the ACU will very kindly sell you a Three Nations trophy! The Welsh Rally is essentially a giant treasure hunt around Wales, starting and finishing near Welshpool. The check points are spread out in such a way that you basically choose either North Wales (Snowdonia and surrounding area) or South Wales (Brecon Beacons and surrounding area). Always good fun and a more relaxed rally than the English National, and again you can make it as hard or as easy as you like by picking the award level accordingly. Details can be found on http://www.clivemcc.co.uk/. The Scottish Rally is similar to the Welsh except that there are no manned controls so you prove you have visited by submitting receipts (for example for petrol, coffee, or a parking ticket as its the only place open at 8am on a Sunday morning in the middle of Scotland!). When I did the Scottish we left Northampton on Friday morning and stayed in a B&B in Inverness Friday and Saturday night. We covered most of the controls on the Saturday then used Sunday to head back to the finish at Crianlarich before heading on to Newcastle for the night. Monday was spent travelling back from Newcastle on some nice twisties before time cut us short and the M1 had to be used! I don't have a website for the Scottish but its run by the Aeriel Owners Club of Scotland.

Jon at Glen Coe

The Round Britain Rally is a photographic treasure hunt over the summer. Each county has a landmark, and to get the points you take a photo of the landmark, control card, and your bike in the same photo. Points are awarded for each landmark based on ease of finding it and distance from civilisation. Don't make the mistake of thinking that landmarks close to centres of population are easy to find... they're not always! Sometimes local knowledge helps, but research is always essential. Its a good way to find some unusual places in the country and quite often in some picturesque places. Website details are http://www.roundbritainrally.co.uk/. If you plan the routes carefully you can fit the Round Britain controls in with the other rallys so you get 3 weekends out in the year making a concerted effort at finding strange places and meeting fellow bikers, then you can fill in the gaps at your leisure depending on how keen you are! Hope this of interest to people, and maybe see you on some next year as this year I'm having a break! The final picture shows that a start can be made close to home with Slindon just up the road. P A G E 13


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July 2009

SAM supports Sailors’ Society A bunch of bikers gave up a day to make sure that a fundraising cycling event went smoothly. Members of SAM volunteered to be marshals on the route for the Deloitte and Sailors’ Society Cycle.

ETTE L E T T E R S .. .L

The Sailors’ Society is an interdenominational charity which operates in 30 countries at almost

R S .. .L E T T E R

S

Sir, only magazine I e th is th is y h W t have letters? read that doesn’ BC, Fareham

a t he’s gone out for the other reader bu k as I’d , on ng Ha : Ed paper. s? t to say for yourselve gh, what have you go ou th n tio es qu od Go ion on topics. There is no restrict

Just a bit of fun Hmmm...........?

FOR SALE WEDDING DRESS

The sponsored cycle ride offered three different routes of 10, 25, and 45 miles, all starting from Mayflower Park in Southampton. Fifteen riders from SAM were available on all three routes during the day, providing medical or practical assistance to the more than 300 cyclists who took part. Graham Smith who organised the SAM riders said “We are only too happy to help the Sailors’ Society on this fantastic fundraising event, it’s a worthy cause and we are proud to be involved.” He continued “We contribute to a number of similar events, previously assisting the Whitely based Hampshire Autistic Society and the Big Wheel from Basingstoke.”

She turned out to be an undercover detective.

Call Stephanie.

How cool is that at her age?

Solent Advanced Motorcyclists and all the volunteers.”

Report based upon an article in The News by Chris Broom. It is understood from a brief conversation with Graham Smith that organising volunteers to support such an event is not as easy as one may at first think. It can be “challenging” to say the least, leading to long and traumatic evenings. His success at getting everything right on the day is acknowledged by the Magazine, well done Graham.

Vicky MacLeod, event fundraiser, said “We are really grateful to the

Now that’s what I call a satnav antenna!

Grumpy Old Biker When I approached the Grumpy Old Biker for his usual missive on bikes, life, and the world in general, he suggested that I should be elsewhere (in two words plus an exclamation mark). Through the fug of his pipe and the slurp of his beer I gathered that he was feeling a little liverish, but I persisted and eventually he declared “that oi ain’t goin to write nuffin cos the club is too sexist”. After he’d slurped some more (at my expense) he declared that “We don’t ‘ave nuff wimmen in the club to look at, and them damn speakers prattle for so long nobody buys me a drink”.

I met a 14 year old girl on the internet. She was clever, funny, flirty and sexy, so I suggested we meet up.

Worn once by mistake.

P A G E 14

100 ports, and aims to enhance the lives of 1.2M sailors who often lead dangerous and lonely lives.

Seen anything interesting lately?

You look after the first bit and I’ll look after the last bit, and perhaps we’ll get him back with some words of wisdom for the next issue.


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July 2009

Circles in the Sand

Wendy passing everyone for an emergency. Her hip flask was empty.

Dr Wendy Peters plays in a sand pit. Sally now runs a restaurant in Kent, but last year she rode around the UK to raise money for an intensive care unit. She had been an intensive care patient eight years ago, and had made a remarkable recovery from a brain haemorrage. This year she planned to take four other ladies on a tour of Northern Peru, so a lady biker doctor was recruited.

Nick put us through our paces. We were certainly kept on our toes (most of us have short legs), and the first day we sped around the course over rocks and through pot holes filled with water until we got it right!!! Mel from Ride magazine was there hoping to get the perfect shot, (our adventure trip had been advertised in MCN) and there will also be articles appearing in Ride magazine so watch out for us.

Somehow the White Helmet Motorcycle display team had agrreed to take 16 lady bikers on their off-road course as a selection and training exercise.

Off to a luxury spa hotel for jacuzzi, dinner, and tales of the day before collapsing exhausted into our executive double beds at the Springfield Country Hotel. Waste of a bed really, we were all just too tired to luxuriate.

So on 4th April we met at Blandford camp for our initial briefing and it was then off to the tank training area at Bovington where Corporal

The next day four girls had been unable to continue and the survivors entered the Dust Bowl!! a small devil’s punchbowl filled with

sand over a foot deep in places with one or two obstacles, including the jump. The only way around without biting the dust was with the throttle wide open whilst the front of the bike bucked and lurched thowing the rider off unless the throttle was opened even more, and the bike wrenched back, before hitting some more sand and going in the opposite direction.

exhaustion, as arms, thighs, and bottoms were equally assaulted. Time for a demo, Coporal Nick demonstrated how to retrieve a dropped bike on a hill, then it was time for farewells.

By now my mouth was full of sand as I had a grin from ear to ear as I battled around the course, I made it around but the exercise was to continue until we were all wringing with sweat, bodies wracked with

Only four of the girls will be picked for the Jaunt to Peru, they have all in some way faced adversity, one lady had had breast cancer, another had had three kidney transplants , another had spinal problems and was now racing sidecar outfits off road. We had survived Bovington, made lots of friends, and were ready to tackle the roads of the Andes.

Next Time ...

(if you send me some photos).

• Andorra and back • Your photos and piccies • Your views and opinions

• A Caption Competition • Photos of the Observers (if they will stand still and someone will take them – please).

P A G E 15


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July 2009

CAPTION COMPETITION: Winner from April 09 issue Caption: I told my wife about the new breast implant but she said she didn’t have the bottle for it. The winner was Paul Nol to whom congratulations and a voucher go. The runners-up were: Rodney Goldup with ‘Modern parallel twins hold their fluids better’ and Joy Davis with ‘The Harley drinks dispenser was found to have a design fault in warm weather’. Only two people made any suggestions until we said that there was a prize, and suddenly they started to flood in, and it wasn’t just the fellas that sent rude ones. It was really hard work reading some of them but I stoically carried on, and now that you have all set a benchmark of the quality that I can expect, well …

Try the new one, surely you can’t get anything rude out of that.

THE NEW CAPTION COMPETITION

Slow riding? Fast riding? Man in black? Woman in leathers? Puzzled panda? Slalom? What’s she doing in the background?

10% discount for SAM members

A £5 voucher to the winner, and the kudos of knowing that your brain is sharper than many others. As many goes as you like. Suggestions by email to SAM-Magazine@ntlworld.com DISCLAIMER Most of the views expressed in this SAM Newsletter are personal to the author and publication does not imply endorsement of any article, any author or any organisation. Views expressed are those of the authors, and are not necessarily in accordance with the policies or the views of the IAM or SAM. Where articles are reproduced from other publications or authors, unreserved acknowledgement is given to the source. No responsibility is accepted by the Editor or SAM for any damage to intelligence or riding abilities, howsoever caused, which might result from reading this publication.

P A G E 16

Help us make progress with a contribution towards the next issue. Pics in jpeg format please.

Magazine email address is SAM-Magazine@ntlworld.com

Design & artwork by KF:D LTD Fordingbridge, 01425 654557

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