The slow lane to Enlightenment OPINION

black smoke and what would appear to be just another cigarette burn.)

By Jeannie Perry Ps & Qs

Editor’s note: This throwback was initially written 15 years ago.

As I sat in my little Easy-Bake Oven of a Subaru on Highway 82 the other day, I managed to switch my attitude from negative to positive. I have been working on spontaneous attitude adjustment for some time now, as anyone who runs into me when I’ve had too much to drink knows. And as for the drinking, ever since the Red Wings won the Stanley Cup (and then proceeded to DENT it) I’ve been in a bit of a mood.

Anyway, I was completely sober and almost fully cooked as I sat in my car, sandwiched between two giant American-made beasts. I felt like an opossum waiting in line at an elephants’ all-you-can-eat buffet. I could not see anything in front of me except for the back of an SUV with Michigan plates and a blinding spark every time the woman’s left hand flicked the ash of her cigarette, causing her eight-carat ring to flash like Superman’s vision. (I imagined at just the right angle it would burn a hole in the upholstery, leaving a tiny wisp of

Letters

MAP Carbondale

When we describe Carbondale to out-of-town family and friends, foremost in that description is our town’s cohesive sense of community, vibrant neighborhoods and active engagement in the outdoors.

Fundamental to that culture is our small-town mobility and easy access by bike, on foot and via transit connections. When the Board of Town Trustees updated the Comprehensive Plan in 2022, they mandated the development of a multi-modal master plan to proactively address the pressures of growth and ensure preservation of our unique bike/pedestrian culture. That process, called Carbondale MAP (Mobility and Access Plan), is underway and actively seeking input from area residents.

The first step in this MAP is to assess the current state of our transportation landscape. Area residents are encouraged to make comments on the Town’s website (carbondaleconnect. org). Additionally, you can stop by the Town’s MAP booth at Wednesday Farmers Markets and/or First Fridays to chat with Town staff and volunteers serving on the Bike, Pedestrian & Trails Commission (BPTC). At that booth and on the website, you will find an interactive street map and the opportunity to pinpoint problem areas based on your bike/ped/transit

My rear-view mirror was completely filled by a Stepford-wife-salon-style and a dark pair of women’s sunglasses. This woman was so far up my — Ahem, I mean our bumpers were practically touching… or rather, her bumper was about to crash through my rear window. I was cranky and sweaty, and you’re probably thinking that I sat there steaming at these two women, but I didn’t.

I flipped my attitude like an overeasy egg (which I could have cooked on the hood of my car in about three seconds) and I bonded with these women. Whether they know it or not, in the 40 minutes it took us to get from Satank Road to the light at 133, I formed an alliance with these women that enabled me to get home safe and sound (and with my car, which I seriously considered abandoning because I could’ve walked home faster.)

FYI, it should never take forty minutes to get from Satank Road to the light at 133. For those of you who are from another planet (a planet where there are no roads), here’s a little Earthly tip: if you’re driving on a two-lane highway and you see everyone lining up in one lane, that’s not because we like to sit in our cars in 90-degree heat and wait. It’s because everyone has to merge into one lane. No, not everyone else, EVERYONE. The people who go flying by in the other lane astound me. I mean, there cannot be that many experiences and when driving, too. You can also identify existing features that you really appreciate.

Moreover, you are encouraged to use these maps to suggest something new, like a dedicated bike lane, additional crosswalk, wider sidewalk, slower speed limit, etc. We hope you will “think big” and imagine a perfect world for your family’s access to school, work, shops, neighborhoods and healthcare and cultural facilities. You may already have completed Age Friendly Carbondale’s survey on Highway 133. That’s great and will be part of this process. Now, we are seeking feedback on the entire town.

After this initial input-gathering phase, the next step will involve recommendations (with the help of a professional team of multi-modal plan designers) for improvements to the current infrastructure.

Recommendations will include changes to the planning and design process so that bike, ped, trails and transit priorities are fully integrated in all future development. Essentially, there are two primary goals:

1) Evaluate and improve current infrastructure based on input from residents; and 2) Create systems that sustain our culture of bike/ped/ transit mobility as Carbondale grows. Stay tuned. There will be other opportunities for feedback as comments are collected and new ideas are proposed. Feel free to clueless, displaced Russian aristocrats left in the world, can there?! And if you’re the kind of person who passes on the shoulder and you ever end up sitting on the barstool next to me, you’d better hope Chris Chelios is sitting on the other side because he’s about the only one I’d rather lecture on minding one’s Ps & Qs.

Back to the women I may never meet, but with whom I shared a very positive encounter; the three of us stuck together like a PB&J that’s fallen behind the seat, not to be discovered for a week or two. We let in no one, and I mean not one car. Not even that guy in the green hummer who almost hit Lois Lane on the driver’s side and then revved his engine at us.

While I realize the non-Zenness of our actions, I have to wonder if knowing when to forgo Buddhist behavior for fewer cooked brain cells isn’t the key to a balanced life…

Finally, a semi-truck came along, blocking all further attempts to cut in, and I relaxed my hawk-like clasp on the steering wheel and slipped the gear into neutral, giving the clutch a break as I coasted along. As I looked at Mt. Sopris, I started to daydream about a little old wise man living on top of the mountain, receiving pilgrims from as far away as Lake Erie.

“Why do we exist?” they would ask with earnestly furrowed brows. “Why does the road lead to these snow-covered mountains? Why does the wind blow from the west to the east?”

To which he would reply, “Because the Red Wings SUCK!” attend the monthly BPTC meetings at 6pm on the first Monday of each month at Town Hall.

Rick Blauvelt (member) and Chris Hassig (trustee)

Carbondale BPTC

CKF success

Wine and Dine for the win! The Chris Klug Foundation (CKF) would like to express its deep and heartfelt gratitude to all those who made our 2023 event a huge success. Our annual awareness and fundraising event helps us share our lifesaving message for organ, eye and tissue donation, and supports our efforts to encourage individuals nationwide before, during and after transplant.

CKF would like to recognize our title sponsor and gold-level supporters: the Hoffberger family. Thank you Captain Jeffrey, Russell, Joanie and Helen for your continued generosity. We would also like to thank our presenting sponsor and silver-level supporters: the Brodsky family. And thank you to the Nicholas family for their half-band sponsorship. Additional appreciation to the Snowmass Club, Schramsberg Winery, Sashae Floral and the Derek Brown Band.

We are grateful for all of our table purchasers and individual ticket holders, as well as those who donated to our cause in absentia. We would also like to continues on page 22

Editor Raleigh Burleigh 970-510-3003 news@soprissun.com

Sol del Valle Editor

Vanessa Porras

Contributing & Digital Editor

James Steindler

Editorial Designer

Hattie Rensberry

Advertising Designer Emily Blong

Delivery

Frederic Kischbaum

Bartlett

Hank van Berlo

Proofreader Lee Beck

Executive Director

Todd Chamberlin 970-510-0246 adsales@soprissun.com

Youth Coordinator Jeanne Souldern

Board Members / Mesa Directiva board@soprissun.com

Klaus Kocher • Kay Clarke

Lee Beck • Donna Dayton

Terri Ritchie

Eric Smith • Roger Berliner

Elizabeth Phillips • Jessi Rochel

Juanma Cespedes • Andrew Travers

The Sopris Sun Board meets at 6:30 p.m. on second Thursdays at the Third Street Center.

The Sopris Sun, Inc. is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit corporation with a mission to inform, inspire and build community by fostering diverse and independent journalism. Donations are fully tax deductible.

Sincerest thanks to our Honorary Publishers for their annual commitment of $1,000+

Lee Beck & John Stickney

Kay Brunnier • Frances Dudley

Michelle & Ed Buchman

Sue Edelstein & Bill Spence

Deborah & Shane Evans

Greg & Kathy Feinsinger

Gary & Jill Knaus • Eric Smith

Peter and Mike Gilbert

Carly & Frosty Merriott

James Noyes • Megan Tackett

Patti & George Stranahan

Anne Sullivan & John Colson

Elizabeth Wysong • Alpine Bank

Emily & George Bohmfalk

Kathy & Carter Barger

Sandy & Paul Chamberlin

Karen & Roger Berliner

Mama Sandy & Lee Mulcahy

Donna & Ken Riley

Legacy Givers for including us in their final wishes. Mary Lilly

Donate by mail or online: P.O. Box 399

Carbondale, CO 81623

520 S. Third Street #26-B 970-510-3003 soprissun.com/Donate

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Our Underwriters and Nonprofit Partners!

Papers, please

All 175 copies of The Sopris Sun delivered to the former City Market in Carbondale have consistently vanished within a few days. We suspect that fat stack is being redistributed at other locations, but would like to confirm. If you need extra copies at a specific yellow box (especially to spread to businesses, neighborhoods, etc.) please shoot us an email at news@ soprissun.com or call 970-510-3003.

Crystal restoration

Carbondale’s Riverfront Park is now closed for a restoration project. The trail’s re-opening date is unknown at this time. Crystal River access from this park and upstream are also closed for public safety reasons, with in-river construction occurring at the Weaver Ditch diversion and along the banks.

CMC trustees

Four positions on the Colorado Mountain College Board of Trustees are up for election this November, including District 2 which encompasses the Roaring Fork School District boundaries and is currently served by Marianne Virgili. Each term lasts four years and nominating petitions (available at 802 Grand Avenue, Glenwood Springs) are due by Sept. 1. For details, contact Julie Hanson at 970-947-8402 or jshanson@ coloradomtn.edu on or after Aug. 9.

Downvalley trash

RJ Paddywacks

Cool Bricks Studio

White River Books

Alpine Animal Hospital

Nonprofit Partners

Wilderness Workshop

5point Film Festival

Basalt Library

Aspen Strong

Carbondale Rotary

Colorado Animal Rescue

Carbondale Arts

Carbondale Chamber of Commerce

Interested in becoming an Underwriter or Nonprofit Partner in 2023? Email Todd@ soprissun.com or call 970-987-9866

Enrollment is now open for Glenwood Springs’ “Pay as You Throw” program allowing residents to select cart sizes for trash and recycling according to their service level needs. The deadline to enroll is Aug. 18 (at www.cogs.us/PAYT). Applicable residences that do not complete enrollment will be automatically set up with the standard option (medium trash and medium recycling bins for $25.44 per month).

Move on over

Beginning Monday, Aug. 7, Colorado is enhancing its “Move Over” law to provide greater protection for people and their vehicles on the side of the road. Drivers will now be required to get over or slow down when passing any disabled vehicle with its hazard lights flashing.

Paint out

The Redstone Art Foundation will host another Plein Air Paint Out event this year. Coinciding with the Redstone Art Show, artists can have their canvas stamped on Saturday, Aug. 26, in front of the Redstone Inn at 9am ($35 registration includes lunch). Their work must be turned in by 7pm that evening to be auctioned off the following day at 3pm. For pieces sold, 30% will be donated to the Jack Roberts Scholarship Fund while the artist keeps the remainder.

Four Mile connection

The Garfield County commissioners unanimously approved a limited impact land use change permit for the installation of a 70foot cell tower, approximately 1.5 miles from Sunlight Mountain Ski Resort. T-Mobile will be the primary carrier linked to the tower,

Aspen Music Festival and School’s second annual Mariachi Celebration attracted hundreds of attendees from throughout the Valley. The concert began with middle and high school students who participated in a mariachi workshop, followed by Aspen Santa Fe Folklórico dancers and a performance by Sol de mi Tierra, a Denver-based group. The Aspen Music Festival continues with events every day through Aug. 20 and an overall theme of “Adoration of the Earth.” According to President and CEO Alan Fletcher, “it’s turned out to be a really powerful theme” which will be reflected in the world premier of composer John Luther Adams’ “Crossing Open Ground,” a piece with 40 wind instruments that will have the audience and musicians moving about during the performance on Aug. 6 at 2pm. Photo by Raleigh Burleigh but it will also accommodate other telecommunication carriers. The applicant will help ensure that the tower mimics its natural surroundings, according to a press release, and construction is expected to begin as soon as possible.

CPW honors military

Colorado Parks and Wildlife (CPW) welcomes active and veteran military and National Guard members to access all state parks freeof-charge for the month of August. To secure a free August Military Pass, visit any CPW office and show proof of service. Visit www. cpw.state.co.us for more information.

Equine West Nile

The Colorado State Veterinarian’s office confirmed the first case of equine West Nile Virus (WNV) of 2023 over the weekend in a gelding in Weld County. The horse presented with sudden neurological symptoms including weakness, stumbling and recumbency and was euthanized. WNV is a reportable disease in both humans and animals and the first human case in Colorado this year was confirmed on July 24 in La Plata County. The state Department of Agriculture encourages the WNV vaccine for horses. To report a case of equine West Nile, you can call 303-869-9130.

They say it’s your birthday!

Folks celebrating another trip around the sun this week include: Margarita Alvarez, Gavin Dahl and Sara Preston (Aug. 3); Megan Gianinetti, Kallie Hyer, Jay Leavitt, Tony Madrigal and Andrew Roberts-Gray (Aug. 4); Cilla Dickinson, Rosie McSwain, Shiloh Merriott and Ixchel Muniz (Aug. 5); Steven Haines and Carly Merriott (Aug. 6); Ed Engelki, Charlotte Graham and Marcelo Lott (Aug. 7); Amber Sparkles, Chris Peterson and Jasmin Ramirez