Class Act

SENSORY STIMULATION … FOR THE EYES AND EARS

ART&CULTURE

Class Act

“RuPaul’s Drag Race” finalist and “Celebrity Big Brother UK” Winner Courtney Act spills the tea in new memoir

BY SHANE GALLAGHER

PHOTO BY JOSEPH SINCLAIR

In her memoir, Courtney Act writes about growing up in the ’80s and ’90s and how her adolescent unconventional angst was pitted against the love of her traditionally wholesome parents. She shares tales of the thrill in discovering the drag scene and then unflinchingly recounts her adventures into its seedier side, filled with drugs and sex. There’s lots of Drag Race tea spilled, too, including her shaky introduction to Adore Delano and oh, the time RuPaul blocked her on Twitter. Told with Courtney’s trademark candor and wit, Caught in the Act is a hilarious, often scandalous, and at times heartbreaking, peek into the beloved drag queen’s journey from RuPaul’s Drag Race finalist to winning Celebrity Big Brother UK and how she learned about gender, sexuality and identity along the way. We spoke with Courtney from her home in Sydney.

Did you always know that you were destined for stardom? From a very early age, I always loved being on stage and performing. I think I always dreamed of being a star. They say fame is 51% luck and 49% hard work.

From reading your book, it seems like we have your sister Kim to thank for Courtney Act. Ah, yes. My sister would dress me up for Halloween and that was always fun. Halloween is getting bigger in Australia now, but it wasn’t in the early 90s when I grew up. We would knock on doors and houses for tricks or treats and no one knew what we were doing!

You also recount the tall, handsome, blond senior that stopped the high school kids from bullying you. I didn’t realize the impact that moment had on my life until writing the book! His standing up for me in my time of need was always a memory that circled around in my brain and only popped up every once in a while.

Why did you decide to tell your story now? After Big Brother, people, especially in the UK, were interested in hearing more of my story, which was so nice. I share my stories in my cabaret but a book is longer and complex and I thought I thought it would give me an opportunity to expand on my stories. So, I spoke with a lot of publishers and found the right one. We would meet on zoom calls twice a week and I’d share everything I had been writing and we would then edit it down to only the good stuff. So much of it ended on the cutting room floor! I wrote 220 thousand words and only 80 thousand made it into the book.

What did you learn from reflecting on the past? When reflecting on my memories, I really immersed myself and considered details that I had only glossed over in my mind before. So, like in the memory of kissing my first boy, it was more than a kiss. It was me on the second level of the dance bar, sitting with the boy on a pleather, cigarette-punctured couch, and suddenly I was remembering the noises and the smells and the incredible feeling I felt inside, realizing that sexuality was no longer denied to me. The process was so healing.

Did you uncover any regrets? Not really. I know that’s a terrible answer, but in truth, even with all of the shoulda coulda wouldas, life finds a way of rolling on.

Proudest accomplishment? This sounds lame and vain, but winning Celebrity Big Brother was really cool. Also, my talk show in Australia, One Plus One. I get to interview people who I think are interesting and wonderful. It’s always a lovely conversation and I find it is an honor to share other people’s stories.

What is important to you now that maybe wasn’t so important to you when you were first launching your career? In the beginning, I focused on me. I was intoxicated by the idea of fame and notoriety. It filled a void for my insecurity and shame and my unexamined feelings of gender, sexuality and identity. As I have matured, I have turned more outward and have begun to focus on how I can be of service to the world and improve the lives of others. I want to be that handsome blonde senior that stood up for me. I have to come to learn that real allyship is caring for people outside of your bubble.

The tall, handsome, blond senior made an impact! I suppose he did. Empathy does not come from understanding someone else’s story and experience. It comes from not being able to understand but still believing what they tell you. When I was younger, I viewed everyone’s experience through my own lens. As I’ve gotten older, I realize I can’t understand everyone’s experiences; I just have to believe what they tell me.

Where are you now on your journey to understanding gender, sexuality and identity? Initially, the labels I adopted helped me to find a place that felt most right for me. However, those labels began to feel limiting. It turns out labels can’t describe every human experience. Whichever way my gender, sexuality and identity chooses to express itself at a particular time is me at that moment and it’s correct.

Has being a celebrity helped or made the process more difficult? Being in the public eye is not something I would wish on anyone unless they have a dream of being something bigger than themselves. Like, I want a band and sequenced costumes and dancers and all that cost a lot of money! You need a big auditorium filled with people to pay for that shit. So, the loss of anonymity is worth it for me. But whenever I see someone going on one of the reality shows with no purpose except to be famous, I always want to tell them ‘don’t do it! It’s not worth it!’ There are better ways than fame to find happiness and contentment. Invest in friends and family and find real purpose.

There is a beautiful quote in the book about how the task of all queer adults is to find their true selves and release those parts that were created as a means of protection. What have you released? I’ve released shame about who I am and all of the pretenses and heteronormative masculine ideals of what someone born with a penis is supposed to be.

Last question: has RuPaul unblocked you yet? Yes, RuPaul has unblocked me.

Caught in the Act: A Memoir by Shane Jenek AKA Courtney Act is available now, wherever books are sold, through Pantera Press.

SHANE GALLAGHER is a Los Angelesbased digital media producer, author and freelance journalist for the Daily Collegian, ElectriCITY and the Los Angeles Times. In another lifetime, he was also an actor, singer and teacher, but today, much of his time is consumed with being a single gay dad of two young children.