3 minute read
SINGLE MAMAS SEEN
BY CHRISTINA MCGAIRK PHOTOS BY BRANDY ROLDAN
Hi, I’m Christina, a super mom raising a precious 11-year-old on my own and taking on motherhood like a champ! Okay, that’s a lie. That’s what I want people to think and see. Yet, to be honest, I am the mother of the most amazing girl in the world, but some days I’m sleep-deprived, stressed out about money and bills, emotional, irritated, and always on high alert for the next meltdown that may happen.
Raising a child as a single parent is rough. Raising a child who has exceptional needs by yourself is super rough, especially when the other parent is non-existent.
I’m blessed beyond measure because I have a village that helps me. I have my Mama, who will do anything for her Grandbaby and”Big Baby” (me). She has helped me emotionally, monetarily, and the list goes on. Even though she doesn’t always agree with my style of parenting, I know her concern comes from a heart that’s good.
Another part of my village is my church family. We felt the love as soon as we walked through the doors seven years ago. They have embraced us and shown us God’s love time and time again. I am forever grateful for them.
Then there’s the special needs community. Once you’re in this loving and accepting circle, you have a family for life. It’s so nice to be around other parents who GET IT. You don’t have to apologize for the way your child is behaving because they understand. They have been there. Their ability to not just empathize, but relate with the ups and downs of special needs parenting is so refreshing.
Yet, I understand not every mother receives that kind of love from family, friends, their support system, their village, especially single mothers. That’s where I want to try to fill the void. Far too often we watch the news or read stories where a mom of a special needs child or adult gets overwhelmed to the point that they abandon them or even end their life. That’s why having that mental, emotional, and spiritual support is so important.
Do I have all the answers about special needs parenting as a single mom? No, I don’t proclaim to. Heck, there are some days when I feel like I’ve fallen short. But I do have life experience and have learned from other single mamas facing the same journey. So this column is not just about my single special-needs parenting adventures, but also other strong single mamas out there.
The bottom line is we have good days and bad days, but no matter how tired, beat down, and helpless we feel, we don’t love our children any less. We will fight to the ends of the Earth for them just like any parent, single or married.
