3 minute read
Labels or Windows
0BY KENDRA ROGERS, MS - EDITOR-IN-CHIEF
When I think back to when my son received his autism diagnosis, I recall a myriad of feelings. First, I hesitated about getting a diagnosis because of the stigma surrounding such labels. I knew my son was peculiar and I excused his mannerisms as quirky but nothing to worry about. However, when he didn’t outgrow the meltdowns he had when he felt like his world was exploding, I realized we needed help. We went to get his label. At least, that’s how I felt some people looked at it. I cannot count the number of times I justified my son’s autism to people who said hurtful things like “Why label him?” and “Everyone is a little autistic.” It made
me think that I was incapable of raising my son without a diagnosis or that I was excusing his behavioral difficulties through the diagnosis.
I imagine I am not the only one for whom these questions and feelings raged. I threw myself into research to understand my son. I felt like with the diagnosis, I had a direction. I could find material that would help me support my son’s development, finally. I had been grasping at straws before getting a diagnosis. Even years later, though, people still challenge me regarding whether my son really needed a label. Even though he has low support needs and does well much of the time, I realized that getting his diagnosis young meant that he would walk through more of his life with some slight understanding from those around him. My husband, who received his autism diagnosis as an adult, spent the first 38 years of his life floundering, masking, and generally confused about his place in the world.
Helping my son find his place as a child because I understood what to look for and how to help him means that he won’t go through life trying to fit into round holes as a square peg.
The number of adults who are now learning that their brains have always operated differently is staggering. These adults are finally learning why they had tumultuous childhoods.
They have been given windows into understanding. They have not been labeled as outcasts but provided with ways to understand and navigate a world that, though they represent about 13% of the population, seems not to understand. Now, they have tools. They understand themselves, which yields an understanding of their place in the world. A diagnosis is not a label but a window looking out toward an understanding of self and others.
While my experience specifically regards autism diagnoses, parents of those with ADHD, Down Syndrome, Trisomy 13, global developmental delays, ODD, and so many other conditions, often find themselves being challenged by others in the same way I was. But I maintain that in every case where a diagnosis aids in understanding a human and their needs, the label provides power. Power for moving forward in what feels like walking through molasses. Power for breaking barriers. Power for celebrating the incredible people in our lives. Embrace your power.
