Sibling's Perspective: Meet the Duff Family-Tendra, Kevin, Kearsley, Trenin and Kaiden

Tendra, Kevin, Kearsley, Trenin, and Kaiden

The Duff’s twin boys, Trenin and Kaiden, were both born with Down syndrome, a 1-in-2-million occurrence. After Kearsley wrote her story, we were happy to learn that Trenin is now free of his tracheal tube (“trach”).

You and your siblings (age, grade, and school) Kearsley Duff, age 8; Trenin and Kaiden Duff, age 5.

How has being a sibling to someone with special needs inspired or impacted you? It has inspired me to want to be a doctor when I grow up.

What advice do you have for other siblings who have a special needs brother or sister? To learn their personalities first before you learn how to do their medical care because that will help you with their medical care.

What are your favorite memories with your special needs sibling? My favorite memories are Christmas with them because Kaiden starts just handing presents out to whoever. It also makes me happy to see them so excited about their presents.

What funny stories would you like to share about your special needs brother/sister? I remember splashing in the mud outside with Kaiden just like Peppa Pig does. He loves watching Peppa Pig and imitates what they do.

A funny story about Trenin was when he grabbed his birthday cake and smeared it all over or when he dressed like Donald Trump for Halloween a few years ago.

Do you admire your special needs siblings? What makes them special, and how have they motivated you? I admire how they are different. They always stand out because Trenin has a trach, and Kaiden has no hair. People then ask questions, and I can tell them all about my siblings. They motivate me by just being themselves.

What are a few of the challenges you experience with having a sibling with special needs, and how have you overcome these challenges? A big challenge is that I don’t always get the attention I want. I have overcome that by asking mom and dad to split 1:1 time with me.

How do you enjoy spending time, and what is your favorite thing to do with your special needs sister/ brother? My favorite thing to do with them is when we get to go on special trips like to Conner Prairie or the pumpkin patch.

Any additional comments or thoughts? My thought is that even though it can be hard at first to understand why a lot of people won’t understand your brothers, you’ll find people that understand them at some point and a friend who truly understands what you are dealing with.

PEAS for Kids

PEAS for Kids specializes in educational consultation, advocacy, and customized assessment plans for children (grades PK-12+).

Assessment plans address emotional concerns and learning disabilities such as Dyslexia, as well as characteristics of Autism Spectrum Disorder and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).

PEAS for Kids strives to utilize the results of our evaluations to provide recommendations for, and work with parents in advocating for their child's educational needs within the school setting.

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Allison M Charette, Ed.S. Nationally Certified School PsychologistFounder, PEAS for Kids(920) 980-1172 • www.peas4kids.comallison@peas4kids.com