Dunklau Family - Diane, Caroline, Kiersten & Bridget

By Maria Smietana

As the mother of three adult daughters, two of whom are on the autism spectrum, Diane Dunklau has paved the path for many younger parents whose children have a similar diagnosis.

A special education resource teacher at White River Elementary in the Noblesville Community Schools, Diane moved here from Michigan with her now former husband more than 33 years ago. All three of her daughters grew up in Noblesville.

“We were among the first families to ‘storm the beaches’ of autism in the school system,” Diane recalled. “We worked to help the girls (Kiersten, now 31, and Caroline, 29) navigate through school and learn independence. Now that they are adults, we are learning to find and secure employment.” Diane’s youngest daughter, Bridget, is neurotypical. She lives and works in Bloomington, IN.

Kiersten went through the College Internship Program in Bloomington and attended Ivy Tech. Caroline was a member of Project Search at Carmel St. Vincent. Both programs were designed to help students with special needs find their independence and future life.

Both young women now work in assisted living facilities, Kiersten in the Lodge at Harbour Manor in the center of Noblesville, and Caroline at Sanders Glen in Westfield. They continue to live at home with Diane in the North Harbor neighborhood where they grew up, along with Ava, the family’s little Maltipoo.

The pediatric helicopter crew and the COVID staff at St. Vincent.

For Diane, it’s important to help her daughters flourish by not only reminding them of their own value but also by teaching their employers and coworkers the value of a special needs employee.

“In the last year they have become front-line workers,” she said. “They have put on their protective gear and gone to work to take care of others in the wake of this pandemic. When they had to work on days like Christmas and Thanksgiving, we talked about how they can be a blessing to the residents who have been quarantined in their rooms for months and are not seeing their families. In a way, Kiersten and Caroline have become their families. They have filled some of the gaps of loneliness and isolation.”

Diane’s experience with her daughters gives her a unique perspective as she works with families of young children with special needs. “I think Kiersten and Caroline are great examples of the potential of people who are different from the norm to make a big difference in the world,” she said.

That positive influence extends well beyond the workplace. Alongside Diane, the two sisters are active in their church, helping with the children’s Sunday school program. Caroline is the president of her Kiwanis Aktion Club chapter. An extension of Kiwanis International, Aktion Club (https://www.aktionclub.org)

is the only worldwide service club for adults with disabilities. She has also acted in a play at Theater Without Borders. “Lyft and Uber changed their lives, enabling them to have transportation and independence,” Diane noted.

Both sisters continue to benefit from therapy at Opportunities for Positive Growth, Inc., (https://www.opgrowth.com) though some of it has been virtual since the pandemic started. Caroline attends pet therapy and music therapy. Kiersten gets recreational and behavioral therapy as well as music therapy.

Kiersten modeling the surgery caps we made for the Life Line

Of course, some of the best therapy of all is traveling to spend time with loved ones. The Dunklau clan frequently goes back to Michigan to spend time with extended family. And wherever they are, Caroline and Kiersten love to relax by drawing, listening to music, and watching movies.

For Diane, some of her best moments over the past year have come from the smiles her daughters have brought to so many of their clients. “Caroline was caring for an elderly resident who used to raise horses, so when she would clean his room, she would tell him she was there to ‘muck out his stall and clean the tack,’” she recalled with a chuckle. “I also feel like my girls have received so much love and appreciation from those whom they serve.”

When asked if she worries about what will happen to her daughters when she’s no longer here, Diane has a refreshing answer. “Every day, I work to empower them to do more and more for themselves. Even though we’re family and love each other very much, our day-to-day interactions are more like roommates. By the time I’m gone, my expectation is that they will be totally able to run their own lives.”

If you would like to share your personal or family story or to nominate someone else to be in an upcoming issue of Special Needs Living, email us at SpecialNeedsLivingIndy@n2pub.com.