Meet The Gailey Family- Kevin, Jane, Max and Sam

By Lena DeZutti

Photos By: 21 Vines Photography

Families all over the world have a lot more in common than you might think. They spend time with each other, support each other, share traditions, and, most importantly, love each other. The Gailey family, made up of Kevin, Jane, and their two sons, Max and Sam (plus Josie, the family pup, and feline Tashi), is no different. What makes the Gailey family’s story unique is that Max not only joined the family through international adoption but has struggled with both medical and developmental issues.

Kevin and Jane adopted Max from China when he was 3 years old. But Max was not like other 3-year-olds. He struggled to meet typical childhood milestones. He had also been born with a cleft lip and palate, necessitating several surgeries, which taught Kevin and Jane to take each step in the process one at a time. “It is easy to get caught up in the ‘what comes next’ part,” Jane said. “But staying in the moment, recovering from one before concerning ourselves with what comes next, is important.”

By the time he turned 14, Max was also diagnosed with autism, epilepsy, and a gene duplication, all of which have contributed to his developmental delays.

Despite these challenges, Kevin and Jane strive to normalize Max’s diagnoses and provide him with opportunities to explore his interests and build his confidence. He attends Midwest Academy, a progressive school in Carmel for kids with learning differences, and will soon be participating in the Special Olympics. He loves to swim, which he does at the Carmel Swim Academy. He learned how to ride a bike through the ICAN bike program at Easter Seals, and he delights in performing in school programs. He loves game time with his dad especially Sorry, the many versions of UNO and Go-Fish, music therapy, volunteering at the Humane Society, and trips to the library with his grandmother.

Having this kind of parental and academic support can have a huge impact in a child’s life. “[Attending Midwest Academy, where Kevin serves as Head of School] has made a world of difference for Max,” Jane said. The school helps “kids with HFA, ADHD, and language processing [issues]. Kids from all over central Indiana attend Midwest. It has a strong sense of community and supports families.”

In addition to Max’s activities, the Gailey family enjoys doing things together, too. When they travel to Michigan to see their extended family or go to Sanibel Island or upstate New York, they include Max in the planning process by providing him with travel information and his favorite comfort items.

Close to home, they have a variety of favorite restaurants, which include Bella Pizza, Piada, Coopers Hawk, and Omoni Korean. And they share interests in music (classical and classic rock), movies (Pirates of the Caribbean), and sports (New England Patriots). Every Friday night is traditionally family movie night. At Christmas, they make cookies and spread out reindeer food on Christmas Eve. The family also strongly believes in participating in community outreach programs. They take part in volunteering with LDA of Indiana, coaching Special Olympics and soccer, helping out at the Humane Society, at their church, and for hospice. Inclusion in all facets of their lives plays a large role in their family dynamic.

Kevin and Jane want other families with a special needs child to know that they’re not alone. “Reach out to others,” Jane said. “Make connections. Being with others helps us all feel like we are in this together. Always advocate for your child. You know them best. We learned very early on to let go of expectations based on chronological age. Max is going to get there when he is ready. He is accomplishing things as he is developmentally ready to do so. The timeline doesn’t matter.”

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