Words Reap What They Sow

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words seeds and sows. Ideas are planted through connections

Conversations make them grow

Nurtured through research and investigation

The words are irrigation

Whether a weed for pain and destruction

Or a seed for change and representation

Words reap what they sow

Stick and stones may break my bones but words control us

The law states as thus

Do this or be punished

Follow the words written by those in power, or be devoured

The power of words aren’t hidden in shadows

They’re plain to see

The motion to get from A to B, takes the use of a GPS

Turn right

Turn left

Ode to Self

The night is engraved in glass. Black dress, heeled shoes, jewellery.

I remember you asking your mother some weeks before, “Can I wear a suit to the formal?” and she said, “no, sweetheart, suits are only for boys.”

I remember you roughhousing with the boys at school. I remember you raising your voice. Being louder. Bigger. Stronger. I remember you beating every one of them in an arm wrestle. I remember you wanting to be them. Being them. I remember you saying I Wish I Were A Boy out loud and proud and without a doubt every day almost every day and yet never thinking to verbalise it. Not a whisper beyond your mind. The words tangled in your vocal chords, clawing at your throat even as your voice never deepened.

I remember the day you stopped swimming.

I remember the day you looked down at yourself when you were eight wondering why you were growing breasts and what that meant. What the word woman meant. Wo-man. An overwhelming question on the tip of your tongue that clattered between your teeth and wriggled between your fingers the first question a child asks is why and yet you never thought to ask it. Never once curling the question mark around why at the age of four you thought about why you did not have ‘boy parts’. Why you could never look in the mirror and see yourself not once not ever why did you seem to recoil?

I remember the day it all clicked. I remember you googling what transgender meant on your bedroom floor. No clothes no skin nowhere to hide. And as it clicked you were not even 13 yet you realised what that meant and holy shit what do I do now.

I remember you telling your friends and they did not understand and your parents and they did not understand and your teachers and your grade and the world and they did not understand.

Take the second exit Laws govern, words dictate

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words define us. You, me He, She, Them Woman, Non-binary, Man Cisgender, Transgender Straight, Gay Student, Teacher Friend, Family Bigot, Ally

Who are you, Who am I The words you choose, define you The words I choose, define me Respect that.

Sticks and stones may break my bones but the pen is mightier than the sword. Wield your weapon with care.

And everything seemed to fall apart.

Then suddenly you were filling the prescription and the moment the testosterone cleansed your blood it was all a blur. To use a cliché. Runrunrun and you are almost 20 years old and alive. No hips no breasts no “that’s such a pretty name” no hiding no fear.

You would be so proud of yourself.

For Transgender Day of Visibility, 31st March 2022.