SRQ Magazine | October 2023, She Roars

SHE ROARS STRONG WOMEN OF THE REGION

MEET THE WOMEN WHO ARE TAKING THE LEAD IN OUR BUSINESS, EDUCATION, HEALTH AND PHILANTHROPIC COMMUNITIES.

PAULINA PORIZKOVA SUPERMODEL AND AUTHOR FINDS HER VOICE AND FIGHTS BACK AGAINST AGEISM

LEISA PETERSON PROSPERITY SHERPA AND THE MINDFUL MILLIONAIRE AUTHOR SPEAKS TO MINDFUL ABUNDANCE

All she did was post a photo of herself in a bikini on Instagram and all hell broke loose. Paulina Porizkova, the supermodel who had spent a lifetime posing for the camera and was called the most beautiful woman in the world, had the nerve to show her body, the body of a woman over 50, on social media and the trolls went ballistic.

Your Best Life at Any Age

UNFILTERED ROAR OF PAULINA PORIZKOVA

Porizkova, the author of No Filter: The Good, the Bad, and the Beautiful , now confident in herself and her skin, found her voice and fought back. In a society where “isms” fill headlines, she took on the one no one wanted to touch. The final frontier of discrimination–ageism–specifically ageism against women. She didn’t just call it out, she invited it onto the front porch for a conversation and a cocktail. And she did it with the whole world watching.

interviewed and written by ashley grant

BORN INTO COLD WAR CZECHOSLOVAKIA, PORIZKOVA WAS ABANDONED AT THE AGE OF 3 TO THE CARE OF HER GRANDMOTHER when her anti-soviet dissident parents ed to Sweden to escape the arsaw act invasion. hen she was her mother, pregnant at the time, returned to rescue her daughter and was placed under house arrest. The media storm that ensued turned orizkova into a political pawn with photos of her face splashed all over the papers. She and her mother were allowed to leave. Upon their arrival in Sweden, orizkova’s father promptly abandoned the family, leaving his wife for another woman. At school, she was physically and mentally bullied by her Swedish classmates. At home, she struggled to care for her younger brother while her mother worked. ith little money, orizkova resorted to shoplifting at times to

provide food for them to eat. hen she was 1 , a chance discovery by an agent landed her a modeling contract and by 1 she was on a photoshoot in aris where she was se ually harassed by a photographer as stylists stood by and laughed it off. In 1 at the height of her career, she won a million contract as the face of ste Lauder–the highest in the industry at that time. She was on the cover of Sports Illustrated twice, was featured on 21 Vogue covers and thousands of other publications, She has been the face of numerous top-brand advertising campaigns, acted in movies, television shows and music videos, was on America’s Next Top Model as a judge and Dancing with the Stars as a participant. She took writing classes and prior to her recent book, wrote and published Ralphie the Roach, a children’s book and A Model Summer, her first novel.

“If

you were to ask me which one of my attributes I’m the most proud of I would say my courage. That is the one thing that I’m certain of. I know I’m courageous because I’m fearful as hell. I have so many fears. I am a ball of fear from morning to night. And I function despite it.”

— Paulina Porizkova

She fell in love at the age of 19 with Ric Ocasek, lead singer for The Cars and after they were married, she dialed back on the modeling assignments and focused on her family, creating a strong blended clan of her two children and Ocasek’s children from another marriage. She deferred to her much older husband who dictated the confines of her career, finances and life.

On paper it looked like a charmed life–a supermodel married to a rockstar. But as she approached 50, her marriage slowly crumbled. Her husband seemed to lose interest in her, the modeling jobs dried up and she felt invisible. The couple decided to separate but live together in their marital home and wait to sell it until after the divorce. Porizkova thought everything was amicable. They planned to get separate apartments close to each other and to always support each other. They were family. When Ocasek was diagnosed with cancer and had surgery, Porizkova stood by his side.

Then in the fall of 2020 came the perfect storm. The sudden death of her estranged husband a year earlier in the home they still shared was followed by the deepest betrayal. Ocasek had written her out of his will two weeks prior to his death. Despite being a breadwinner for the family for many years, Porizkova had no access to money, her home was heavily mortgaged and accounts were tied up in litigation. To add insult to injury, the man she had been dating dumped her. She was alone. During Covid. Broken hearted, betrayed and most painfully abandoned. She would need to reinvent her life. She had done it many times before. In order to do that though she needed someone to show her the way. Drowning in grief and despair, she shouted into the void of the internet and waited for help.

Enter her followers, 1.1 million of them on Instagram to date, who lifted her up and provided the platform for her to share her voice. Porizkova posted soulful musings with raw emotion alongside the barefaced unfiltered selfies of a grieving woman trying to pull herself up by her bootstraps. “When I was at my worst, in that period between my husband’s death and me writing the book, and Covid, everything bad just happened all at once. People would say to me, you’re experiencing this for a reason, you’re being nudged by the universe to go to the next step and it might be painful in the meantime, but you will find out why this was necessary. And I just felt f off. If you’re right then great, but it’s so not helpful right now when I am drowning to tell me that I’m drowning for a good reason. It is absolutely not helpful”, she says. Connection was her way out of the darkness and during the pandemic the form of connection available to her was Instagram. “We really need connections as humans and no, it doesn’t have to be romantic connections. Family can be friends. I knew that if I could turn my love outward, it would sort of mirror back to me. So I think turning your love outwards, whether it’s the connection or doing something good for somebody else, helping people in need, I know it sounds trite but being generous and being kind to others makes you feel better about yourself. My biggest lesson–love turned outwards” she says.

Porizkova was celebrated for her honesty, vulnerability and courage, the latter being something she says helped her to keep moving despite the crippling an iety and panic attacks she has suffered from for years. She notes that “If you were to ask me which one of my attributes I’m the most proud of I would say my courage. That is the one thing that I’m certain of. I know I’m courageous because I’m fearful as hell. I have so many fears. I am a ball of fear from morning to night. And I function despite it. aria Shriver, so impressed with Porizkova ’s candid posts, asked her to write a book in the same fashion as her instagram.

But then came the trolls and the inevitable questions about whether a woman of a certain age has a right to live her life as she deems fit. veryone had an opinion it seems. Some of them were vile. Of her bikini photo, one commenter wrote, ‘You must be in so much pain to keep posting bikini pictures at your age. I’ve always thought that getting old and ugly is hardest on the pretty people. The fall from grace is so much father when you were beautiful. I pray you can come to terms with your mortality. We all get old and ugly...you just had to fall from a greater height than the rest of us.’

Porizkova’s response was a study in eloquence and grace. A woman of is too old to pose in a bikini-no matter what she looks like. Because “old” is “ugly.” I get comments like these every time I post a photo of my body. This is the ageist shaming that sets my teeth on edge. Older men are distinguished, older women are

ugly. People who believe prettiness equals beauty do not understand beauty. Pretty is easy on the eyes, partly because it’s a little bland, inoffensive, It’s easy to take in and easy to forget. Not so beauty. Beauty can be sharp. It can wound you and leave a scar. To perceive beauty you have to be able to S . This is why I believe we get more beautiful with age. We have earned our beauty, we understand what it is, and we can see it so much better. There is no such thing as old and ugly. nly shortsighted and ignorant,” she wrote.

She followed up with another stunningly gorgeous bikini post, this time with a touch of cheeky shade. She wrote, A thoughtful reader comment on I needs an e ually thoughtful response. Thank you for feeling my pain. As you can see I’m suffering indeed.

Then a fabulous thing happened. utraged by this attack, women started sharing stories of their suffering on Instagram, posting photos of themselves in bikinis in support of orizkova with a special hashtag. ld Ugly uickly went viral. A supporter wrote I’m 0. The super cool thing about being 0, I’ve discovered, is I truly don’t give a % what anyone thinks, and i’m glad you don’t, either. You’re just as gorgeous as ever. ay we all keep posting our suffering. orizkova responded, You suffer beautifully .

Recently another slew of hate and outrageous comments were directed at her She looks years old, no less . . . my -year-old grandma looked like this. I would love to see her hair colored. It’s pretty brown. She would look 0 years younger .

Jeeeeeeezzzzz..she’s looking 0

The disheartening thing is that the majority of these comments were from women. “Nobody trashes women as effectively as women, orizkova says. And I think it’s all shame-based. You don’t feel good about yourself, so you take your shame out on somebody else. It’s infantile. It’s not very advanced. But this is what people do and I think it’s this shame that you might not be enough.

orizkova notes that social media has led to more comparison and competition that provides the fodder for the trolls. She says, ne thing I’ve spent a lot of time contemplating lately is the comparison market. We’re programmed to compare because that’s how you know your position in the world where you belong. But when we were growing up, the comparisons were to your friends and the people in school. So, your field of comparison was fairly narrow. Now you go on social media and you are bombarded with images of not only your friends that look way better than you think you will ever look, but of everybody. It’s just constant visuals that you can’t help but draw comparisons between. The representation of people tweaking themselves so that they can showcase themselves as they would like to be seen as opposed to who they are. It’s mind blowing just the sheer amount of it.”

In recognizing the platform that provided her with support in her darkest hour was also the source of the cruel jabs, she says that part of the issue was the nature of the platform itself. “How do you connect as a human being to other human beings? How do you trade love? It’s not based on perfection. It’s based on vulnerability, which nobody apparently has anymore because you can filter that and so I think it’s just because we are still in the beginning stages of this whole Internet revolution thing. The virtual world–we don’t uite know how to navigate it. ur brains are not keeping up with technology. e’re oundering and people are yelling insults at each other, and they’re all dividing up into tiny little cli ues. I decided that I can only handle my little corner. So I’m going to be the person I want to be and the person that I would like to see. If I don’t see those people, then I’ll be one. So it’s a good thing to start - if you want some kindness, be kind, she says. orizkova is no stranger to public projection. hen she was first modeling she desperately tried to be taken seriously. She never wanted to be a model and would have much preferred to be a writer or an artist. She was and is whip smart but as orizkova notes she was considered “smart for a model which is a low bar.” Any chance she had to showcase her intelligence or opinion and was shut down, not that she didn’t try. She fought back, giving magazine and television interviews that showed her self-deprecating sense of humor and brilliant retorts to insulting uestions. In 1985 she was interviewed on the iconic Late Night with David Letterman and legendarily put him in his place. orizkova knew Letterman would make jokes at her e pense. She was ready. on’t you think models are superficial, vain, self-absorbed and shallow he asked. Absolutely she replied. h really But you don’t think you’re that way he pressed. f course not, because I don’t think of myself as a model, she said. Astonished, Letterman asked, h, so what are you ith a side smile and arched eyebrow orizkova shot back, A human being ave. She was 21. hen young, she had to fight to prove that intelligence and beauty can coe ist. Now she is fighting to prove that age does not render women irrelevant.

The recipient of the 202 omen ho oar SRQ Trailblazer Award presented to women who are passionate about living their dreams at any age, orizkova has become a light in the darkness and a guide inviting others along the journey of living a fabulous life as a 0 something woman. She is amazed at the audience she has and is deeply grateful for their support. When reminded of how large her Instagram following is she responds with amazement, hen you say I have a million followers, how did that happen I’m so grateful that I do. it boggles my mind. hen I go to these events for my book, and my ladies are there to greet me there’s

unity and it’s unbelievable. And this came about because I was reaching out to them. This is a community built on connections with kindness.”

She says that she never intended to become the face of positive aging, “That was an enormous amount of luck because it was not a conscious move on my part, I had no idea what I was doing. I was just trying to connect to other lonely people out in the universe. I also didn’t know that my own aging face was going to be seen as off putting as it did to certain people. I mean, initially, I would get shocked by the ‘old hag retire yourself’ comments. I thought that I was doing pretty okay for my age. I’ve had an entire life of carrying other people’s assumptions about who I was so that is the one thing I wanted to dismantle. I’m just going to be myself and being myself means I don’t want to erase my age. I’m not the airbrush filtered version that looks 0 years younger and I have the sense that this is better. I know it’s not celebrated, but it is actually better. I feel like I like myself. I have more confidence. So, why not embrace this she says.

She notes the topic of ageism is complicated in this modern age. “I feel like we are starting to talk about ageism now but everybody’s really confused on the topic because you don’t have to look your age. Then it’s sort of like what is ageism Is it looking at the people who are aging naturally as sort of giving up and therefore ageism is okay when directed at them And the ones who are fighting it and taking steps not to look old are aging gracefully therefore they will be less discriminated against I think we’re sort of in the infancy of taking on ageism because for most of our existence, for women, ageism was just the fact that after you went through menopause you were dead as far as anybody was concerned. It’s not the same for men and I think the world has at least come so far as to where women do have a voice and we can speak up and say we don’t think that’s cool. We don’t think that’s fair. So that’s a positive step,“ she says.

But the impact of ageism against women is more than just trolls on the internet and pressure to have cosmetic surgery. There are huge financial and market implications as well. The following statistics are jaw dropping. The buying power of women older than 0 is $15 trillion which represents 27% of all consumer spending according to Business Insider. However just 5percent to 10-percent of marketing budgets are directed toward 0-plus consumers, reports the Harvard Business Review. As a result, 91-percent of this demographic feels ignored and misunderstood, according to research by GirlPower Marketing. “Part of that is our fault,”

Porizkova says. “Because when we buy, we don’t want to buy from our peers. We want to buy from women that we wish we looked like. And it’s not our age, it’s younger. We don’t want to buy an anti-aging cream from a woman who has wrinkles because then it didn’t work. e buy it from a 0 year old on which it apparently worked miracles. This is the self-defeating part of it and it’s understandable. I know, because I buy into the same system. It’s kind of a self-perpetuating problem that we are told that we’re not valuable when we are a certain age and so we all want to look a younger age to still remain valuable. So we all buy things that are advertised by young women. Then we perpetuate the idea that only younger women are valuable because they’re the only ones that sell. Of course it all always comes down to money. What sells is what’s going to be pushed on me. And then we push more women that look ageless or that look young and here we are just running as fast as we can on this treadmill while other people are walking in place.” omen are also finally speaking out about ageism in the workplace. According to the latest “Mirror/ Mirror” survey from AARP, nearly two out of three women age 0 and older say they are regularly discriminated against and those experiences appear to be taking a toll on their mental health. In an interview with Fortune, Heather Tinsley-Fix, a senior advisor of employee engagement at the AARP says, “Women face a much higher bar with regard to ageism; they experience it earlier and more frequently than men. Therefore, women may feel they need to take action to look younger, leading many to accrue a hefty cost.”

When asked how women can combat ageism at work Porizkova notes, “There’s a huge expenditure of energy doing that. You just maintain the look part and then you also have to do the job better than everybody else in order to even stay in it. I sure as hell don’t have the answers. I do have a lot of questions. We’ve only started shedding light on this issue. This is just starting to be talked about and still at a fairly low level. I mean we did the whole conversation of what is beauty It can be different colors. It can be different genders. It can be different sizes. hen it comes to age, we still have to look like we’re below forty. And I think it’s an enormous amount of pressure on women. Fortunately, what comes with age is that you are better at dealing with pressure. But it’s ridiculous to have to erase your age so that you will be counted at the important table and not relegated to the peanut gallery.”

Above: Ric Ocasek and Paulina Porizkova attend the 20th Anniversary Celebration Of The Children’s Defense at Guastavino’s on December 6, 2010 in New York.

On predicting the future, Porizkova is still on the fence. She says, “It’s really hard for me to tell which way it’s going to swing. For example, right now there’s a Vogue cover with the four supermodels on it. It’s lovely. I mean they’re extraordinarily beautiful women. But when you look at it, do you think they’re women in their mid-50s? You can be in your mid 50s if you look in your mid 30s and then you’re valuable. We keep getting that same message over and over. We’ll value you at 50 or 60 provided you look a whole lot younger. Then we’ll celebrate you, then we’ll say you’ve aged gracefully, which actually means you didn’t age at all, and you’ve taken great steps to look that way, which means it took a lot of money, and a lot of your time that you could have spent in other ways. For example, on the job.”

The next subject Porizkova wants to tackle is one she thinks is sorely needed by her demographic. “I’m thinking about writing a book about middle-aged dating and sex because I had three years as a single woman at the worst age possible to be single, so I feel like I have stories to tell. Sexuality and the older woman is such a taboo topic. Again, because we are a certain age we are not only supposed to disappear from the collective, from the workforce, but from sex also? No. More and more women are not willing to put up with that. I find it a really interesting topic that I would love to talk about with women. I remember when I was dating not that long ago, I just wished that there was a book that spoke to me about this,” she says.

Happily she is now off the market and blissfully in love. She says “I had this amazing sense of faith that I was waiting for him to walk into my life. I didn’t know

where he was. I didn’t know how long it was going to take, but I woke up on January 1st with this absolute certainty that I was waiting, the door was open and he would walk through it.” And he did. Porizkova describes her boyfriend Jeff as the most optimistic man who sees the world as magical. She says, “I got pretty much everything that I ever looked for. Again, with the perspective of distance and time, at 58 I look back at the life that I’ve had and I think, no question about it, this is the happiest I’ve ever been. I am perfectly fulfilled and I wake up every day and have this moment where I just say I’m embracing everything that I have because I’m so incredibly fortunate.”

On the darkness that threatened to consume her, Porizkova notes, “We’re all candles by nature of being alive. e are a ickering ame. It’s about recognizing and understanding that you are your own light. If you pay attention to the fact that the ickering ame that you keep looking for outside actually lives inside you, you’ll find it. Sometimes it just gets really, really dark and you need the re ections of light. You need fire ies. You need to know that there is the existence of light. Sometimes your light goes out. I feel like mine was close to not existing and this is where I needed to understand the possibility that light could be ignited again, maybe by another light.”

Now that she has found her way “blindly out of the mess” as she puts it, Porizkova says “I want to continue to do what I do now, which is meet women who give me strength and whom I can give strength to.” She is acting as a beacon for others all the while reminding us that she is just a fellow traveler on this journey. She says, “I’m carrying a lantern saying I’m going this way. Do you want to go this way? You’re welcome to come with me as long as everybody that’s going with me, also knows that I don’t know where I’m going. We’re going to discover this together. I don’t want to fall off the cliff, and I don’t know that I’m not heading for it, but I do feel like if there’s enough women walking in a circle with me we can navigate better. I can’t navigate all by myself.”

SHE ROARS

Paulina Porizkova will be recognized at SRQ Magazine’s Together We Roar Leadership and Awards Luncheon taking place on Friday, October 27, 2023 at Michael’s On East. Popup Boutiques open at 10:30am. Registration opens at 11am. The luncheon program beings at 11:30am. Table sponsorships and tickets are available online at SRQMAG. COM/WEROAR through October 22, 2023 at midnight.

Leisa Peterson is an inspiring wayfinder on the journey from scarcity mindset to mindful abundance

PROSPERITY SHERPA

interviewed and written by ashley grant

PROSPERITY GURU AND AUTHOR OF THE THE MINDFUL MILLIONAIRE, LEISA PETERSON IS A MAGIC RAINMAKER who is passionate about the correlation between mindset and abundance. The recipient of the SRQ Women Who Roar Illuminator Award, presented to women who are shining a light on tools to empower women to live their best lives, eterson is armed with an eclectic tool kit comprised of a strategic financial background spanning 2 years in the banking and financial services industries combined with with holistic mindfulness practices. Peterson’s special sauce is navigating the “why” behind money issues–rooting out the blockages in an intuitive and practical manner that demonstrates how deep seated emotions and fears can have a huge impact on abundance. A personal epiphany that pursuing money is not the end goal of life led her to create a left/right brain prosperity magnet system that leads her clients on a path to understanding themselves and their money habits. Through her book, YouTube videos, coaching Podcasts and online groups, she has become the go-to source for holistic abundance. A financial sherpa who combines practical magic with proven methodology, eterson has managed to create abundance beyond her wildest dreams and now she helps others to do the same. We sat down with her to discuss her passion for helping others and how we can all become mindful millionaires.

HOW DID YOUR BACKGROUND INFLUENCE THIS WORK?

LEISA PETERSON: I came from nothing and had parents who were not good with money. They weren’t good at making it. They weren’t good at saving it nd they definitely were not good at investing in it s a result, we were always a ing finan ial struggles and the stress was un eara le to me as a hild Somehow figured out very early on how to reate wealth or mysel started my first usiness at , got my first o at , a lied or and re eived my first redit ard at yes, lied a out my age and said was ut it was that im ortant to me to start wor ing on my redit as early as ossi le and y senior year in high s hool was earning over a month wor ing ust a ew hours a day in a o loved, as a nanny aid ash or my first s ooter at , ought my first ar with a ig down ayment and a ar loan than s to my great redit that was aid off in one year later om leted undergraduate and an without owning a ent u on graduation y hus and and uilt our first home at and we made and saved our first million y ther than having a mortgage I’ve never been in debt for more than a few thousand dollars ow that we re em ty nesters we re finan ially inde endent and a le to also hel get our hildren set u with ully aid ollege tuition and uying their first homes. This is a dream come true for someone who grew u with great finan ial stress and struggles

WHAT IS THE SECRET TO YOUR SUCCESS? y talents lie in the a ility to ui ly identi y the o sta les that stand in the way o living the ullest li e ossi le and hel ing eo le trans end those lo s This su er ower has ueled the growth o my oa hing usiness, hel ed

me to write The Mindful Millionaire, and it s hel ed me to reate a trans ormational ro ess that is effe tive, methodi al and sti s with you

WHAT WAS YOUR OBJECTIVE IN WRITING THE MINDFUL MILLIONAIRE? To hel ins ire eo le to heal their relationshi with money so they ould reate wealth mind ully rather than mindlessly ter wor ing with eo le and their money or over years, saw they either had a s ar ity or ros erity oriented mindset and de ending u on whi h they had, it would affe t their e erien es with money in ways that were mostly un ons ious y goal with the oo is to hel eo le shi t the patterns that prevent them from creating peace of mind and wealth in their lives

WHAT IS A MINDFUL MILLIONAIRE? mind ul millionaire is an individual who see s to align finan ial su ess with ersonal growth, sel awareness, and mind ulness t s a out a hieving a state o a undan e and ros erity in oth e ternal wealth and inner well eing ey attri utes o a mind ul millionaire in lude Self-Value: Re ognizing that ersonal worth is not solely tied to finan ial su ess ut is a rodu t o sel awareness, sel a e tan e, and inner growth Mindfulness ntegrating mind ulness ra ti es into finan ial de isions and daily li e, whi h hel s in ma ing ons ious hoi es, redu ing stress, and romoting a alan ed outloo on money Inner Work ngaging in inner wor to un over and address dee seated elie s, ears, and emotional atterns that may e affe ting finan ial ehaviors and overall well eing Integration of Spirituality nderstanding that ros erity is not

just about money; it involves spiritual and personal development, leading to a holistic sense of abundance. Transformation: Embracing personal transformation that allows for a shift in one’s mindset, emotional responses, and behaviors related to money, leading to ositive hanges in finan ial circumstances. Holistic Well-Being: Recognizing that wealth and success are best experienced when accompanied by good health, ulfilling relationshi s and a sense of purpose.

HOW IS MINDFULNESS, THOUGHT AND EMOTION LINKED TO ABUNDANCE? Money mindfulness isn’t just about accumulating wealth; it’s about achieving a state of true prosperity that encompasses both material a undan e and inner ulfillment This concept is rooted in the understanding that genuine self-value does not solely come from external sources like money, relationships, or appearance. Instead, it arises from within and contributes to a sense of true self-worth, regardless o finan ial status y a roa h emphasizes the importance of understanding and transforming one’s relationship with money and oneself. I believe that many people struggle with their finan es and overall well being because they haven’t addressed the emotional and psychological aspects related to money. By delving into one’s beliefs, feelings, and attitudes about money, individuals can work toward releasing limiting patterns and a hieving finan ial reedom

HOW IS YOUR WORK DIFFERENT FROM FINANCIAL COUNSELING? Money is complicated and it isn’t easy to help people change how they think about money using only one approach like therapy. Many people come to me after having gone to therapy for many years—but because their therapist(s) hadn’t focused on their own personal money elie s and hallenges, it was di ult or them to help their clients. It wasn’t something they were familiar with and therefore the topic didn’t come up or they didn’t spend time getting to the root of why they believed certain things about money. Working with people and money for nearly 3 decades and being a deeply intuitive person allowed me to see money belief “threads” that are underneath

a person’s life and often causing them various levels o suffering in luding the la o a ility to bring their dreams into reality. Much of the time just the introduction of these beliefs into a person’s awareness is enough to help them begin the shift into a new way of looking at money and their relationship to it. By seeing and sharing what people can’t see for themselves, I help people notice, understand, heal and integrate their limitation-based money stories which allows them to write a new and more abundant version of their life that they get to play out to its fullest dimension.

DESCRIBE THE CHALLENGES AND BENEFITS OF BEING CREATIVE. HOW DO YOU APPLY THAT CREATIVITY TO THE BUSINESS OF BUSINESS? have never fit in ll my li e have een different n how think, how I talk, how I dance, how I dress, how ma e my hoi es a out li e This hasn t een easy and it has allowed me to be creatively me. Everything I do in business is about allowing my differen es to e availa le or anyone to see

WHAT HAVE BEEN YOUR STRONGEST TOOLS IN OVERCOMING ADVERSITY AND CHALLENGE? Tena ity and ersisten e they have helped me keep going even when the ursuit o my goals elt very di ult and challenging. Women can build these tools for themselves by putting blinders on when it comes to worrying about what other people may think about you, keep going even when you aren’t sure it will be worth it and believe in possibility way more than you believe in failure. I think that we must overcome our fear of failure to be able to achieve the things we most want to get in life — great relationships, wealth, a favorable reputation, the ability to make an impact in the lives of others will all require us to give up our deepest fears surrounding ailure This isn t easy ut it wor s very well.

SHARE ONE PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE WHERE YOU HAD TO TAKE A HUGE LEAP OF FAITH/TAKE A RISK. Hiring a team of people to help me run my company involved a huge lea o aith t was di ult or me to be responsible for others livelihoods and it

worked out well as we were able to grow the om any to multi le si figures in a short period of time and impacted thousands of eo le s lives in enefi ial ways as a result

HOW IS YOUR WORK CONTRIBUTING TO EMPOWERMENT FOR WOMEN? I wanted to create a simple process inside my book that anyone could follow and do themselves while reading the book and answering the questions. It is best suited for people who don’t mind rolling up their sleeves and diving into things they might not fully understand about themselves — this is something that I’ve found women are tremendously capable of doing for themselves.

WHAT ARE THE TRAITS THAT YOU BELIEVE MOST EMPOWER WOMEN THE MOST TO LEAD? Always remember that you are only limited by your own beliefs about what is possible and what isn’t. You must always bet on yourself and what you are capable of doing when you become very focused on achieving an outcome. For business owners, this doesn’t mean you can do anything, rather that you must figure out what you are really good at doing, for which people will happily pay you or at least consume what it is you are creating. on t sto until you figure it out and have success with it. If it isn’t working as you had hoped, you must stop what you are doing— take stock in what’s happening and be honest with yourself that maybe what you thought you were good at isn’t what others think you are good at it That is o ay, as long as you don t keep trying to do something that isn’t working and then beating yourself up about that. You must try something different erha s very different e ore you ll find su ess

WHAT TREND CONCERNS YOU THE MOST ABOUT THE FUTURE? The ever growing divide between those who have money and those who don’t— it is becoming harder and harder to pay for a comfortable life in the US without going into huge amounts of debt and that is very concerning to me.

“Always remember that you are only limited by your own beliefs about what is possible and what isn’t. You must always bet on yourself and what you are capable of doing when you become very focused on achieving an outcome.”

— Leisa Peterson

WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THOSE WHO ARE STRUGGLING WITH ABUNDANCE BUT SUSPICIOUS OF A LESS LINEAR APPROACH TO DEVELOPING PROSPERITY? I’d say you have nothing to lose by opening your mind to an alternative reality — you can’t believe in something fully until you are living it — and so perhaps it would be fun to suspend disbelief and see what it could feel like for you to live in abundance — what would you want for yourself if you could wave a magic wand and it omes s ing yoursel , what are you so a raid o when it omes to magi and ossi ility hy does it eel s ary to you hat would you lose (from how you think today) if you were to elieve in a undan e or yoursel and others

HOW DO YOU MANAGE THE WORK/LIFE BALANCE CHALLENGE? I haven’t always been good at this—but I have done it recently by closing down aspects of my business to allow for more creativity and time to travel. I’d say don’t wait to do it like I did (when you have enough money to do it). Find a way to do it now and integrate your approach into your lifestyle so that you don’t forget how your life is outside of work.

WHAT IS THE BIGGEST ‘AHA” MOMENT YOU HAVE HAD? I needed The Mindful Millionaire to help me a lot more than I realized while writing it. It’s been three years and I can see how the work has changed my entire way of being as a result. What I have learned is that li eration and finan ial reedom are oth a process and they take time to create. By inviting ourselves into this journey and taking it seriously, we can change our lives. This is a very mature way to think about life and your money t is a out finding integration with all parts of yourself, your money, your business

and your relationships. You aren’t leaving anything out of the process. You see that how you do one thing is how you do everything. overty mindset affe ts your li e in multi le ways and this process helps you see what kinds of changes you need tomake you change your way of looking at life.

WHAT WAS THE MOST CHALLENGING PERSONAL EXPERIENCE YOU HAVE RECENTLY FACED AND HOW HAVE YOU NAVIGATED IT? Recently I came to the realization that without the need to earn money ould live my li e differently than had been. It was a challenge for me to be willing to step back from all that I was involved in including running my company to ask myself what is truly important at this time in my life. When I did that I saw that my priorities had shifted and it was time for me to enjoy my life through the art of play and travel rather than working all the time. I was addicted to work as a way of being and that no longer made sense for me so I decided to shut down much of my business — and give parts of it to a key employee so she could continue to earn money from what we had built together. In the aftermath of these changes I realized that I had been too burned out to realize I was burned out and it was time to reinvent myself and how I live my life. I’m still in the ro ess o figuring this out

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO WOMEN OF ALL AGES IN PURSUING THEIR DREAMS? Don’t allow yourself or anyone else to talk you out of pursuing your dreams. Even when it doesn’t seem likely or possible - there is always a chance you are wrong — and so why not just go for it —- do it responsibly (like don’t quit your day job until you have

roven your on e ts and you will find a way to thrive t is your res onsi ility to figure out the pattern underneath whatever isn’t working in your life. Is it that you aren’t earning enough, spending too much, or not managing money effe tively s it e ause you re not as ing for what you most want - from yourself, your employer, your partner or even from God. t is riti al to figure out what is not wor ing and then see what beliefs are connected to your limiting patterns. My book, The Mindful Millionaire, helps people do this exact process for themselves and much more. The idea is you need to become aware of what’s not working before you can change it. Once you know, you can focus on what needs to be done, both immediately and longer term to change your finan es and your li e orever n e you master your money along with how you feel about yourself, there is no going back—your life is about to improve in big ways! Anything is ossi le and now any o us an figure out how to create what we most want. So much of life’s journey is about falling in love with yourself and your own potential. From there you get to give yourself permission to go after all that you dream for and achieve it.

KNOWING WHAT YOU KNOW NOW, WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO YOUR YOUNGER SELF? Please stop worrying about what other people think and just do it! NOW! SHE ROARS

Leisa Peterson will be recognized as the 2023 Illuminator Award Recipient at SRQ Magazine’s Together We Roar Leadership and Awards Luncheon taking place on Friday, October 27, 2023 at Michael’s On East. Popup Boutiques open at 10:30am. Registration opens at 11am. The luncheon program beings at 11:30am. Table sponsorships and tickets are available online at SRQMAG.COM/WEROAR through October 15, 2023 at midnight.

RECOGNIZING THE WOMEN TAKING THE LEAD IN SARASOTA + MANATEE

STRONG WOMEN OF THE REGION

Sharing the Stories of Women In Leadership as They Guide Our Region's Business and Independent Sectors

LIZA CARDEN, LG HOWARD & COMPANY | AMANDA CHAMP, SURFING COCONUT | DEANNA GERHARDT, HONEYGLOW BY DEE AESTHETICS

JESSICA MUROFF, UNITED WAY SUNCOAST | KRISTIE SKOGLUND, THE FLORIDA CENTER FOR EARLY CHILDHOOD

CHELSEA VACCA, LOTUS AESTHETICS AND WELLNESS

JESSICA MUROFF CEO, UNITED WAY SUNCOAST

"You can’t always have a summit, but you can always have an adventure."

WHAT HAS BEEN THE SINGLE BIGGEST CHALLENGE IN WORKING AND LIVING THROUGH THE PANDEMIC AND HOW HAVE YOU CHANGED AS A RESULT? The biggest challenge was true human connection. On one hand, we really came together to support one another (albeit virtually) and we learned the critical importance of truly working together in times of a crisis. Fast forward three years and this near always-virtual environment has taken its toll on our stress and anxiety, not to mention our connection with others. This year has been great to be back and connecting in person with others, but we are still feeling the impacts of the always connected world still responding to crisis that continues to come. I’ve certainly become more resilient, but I have also had to learn how to manage more stress than I’ve ever experienced before. HOW HAS AN EXPERIENCE IN YOUR PERSONAL LIFE MOTIVATED YOU?

In 2022 I successfully completed the 29029 Everesting challenge. I had to climb a mountain eight times in 36 hours reaching a total of over 30,000 feet elevation gain. It was the hardest physical and mental experience of my life. I truly learned that I could push through limits, keep myself going in the most difficult of circumstances and learned how powerful mindset is when your inner critic wants you to quit. I also learned how important it is to be prepared, but that really only takes you so far when you are actually in the moment you’ve prepared for. 29029 taught me what I am capable of doing and it is even more than I ever imagined. WHAT IS YOUR “SECRET SAUCE?” Radical transparency. It is one of my most important values. This helps to build trust, knowledge and spurs innovation. When we are open and sharing, our teams value it and they can contribute to overcoming challenges and embracing opportunity. DESCRIBE YOUR OWN OUTLOOK ON LIFE IN SIX WORDS... I only need two: Be Present. “EVERY DAY I AM THANKFUL FOR … the amazing people in my life that I love with my whole heart and the work that I get to do to make this world a better place.” 100 WORDS CAPTURING YOUR BUSINESS/ORGANIZATION OR PHILANTHROPIC WORK: United Way Suncoast gives families and community members the "Freedom To Rise." We elevate early learning, we energize middle school and high school students on a path to postsecondary success, and we empower community members and families through financial stability. Through nonprofit partnerships and our own initiatives, we center our work on the 45% of Suncoast households who can’t cover basic needs and are one phrase away from crisis: the ALICE (Asset Limited, Income Constrained, Employed) population. For 99 years, we have also "stood up" for this region when a crisis occurs. We live up to our brand by coordinating "united" efforts to address emerging needs, be it a pandemic, a housing crisis or a hurricane. As we always say, United We Rise, United We Win.

Whether she’s filming a thank you video with corporate partner Publix, addressing a gathering at Leadership Sarasota or advocating for community members with a Manatee County commissioner, United Way Suncoast CEO Jessica Muroff continues to shine as a …STRONG WOMAN OF THE REGION.

DEANNA GERHARDT

OWNER, HONEYGLOW BY DEE AESTHETICS

"If you've already made it, help them get there. A rising tide lifts all boats."

MY SINGLE MOST SIGNIFICANT STRENGTH IS HAVING DISCERNMENT. Both personally and professionally, I am able to be intentional with my decisions, big or small. I believe this led me to launching a business that would change the trajectory of my life: Honeyglow by Dee Aesthetics. I help individuals feel confident and beautiful, by working on their skin goals through a series of facial treatments & results driven products. There's something so empowering about making others feel good about themselves. We all have challenges in life, so to provide a safe space & moment of zen for people, while still targeting their skin concerns, is a form of self care I get to provide to our community. At HG, we value both relaxation yet corrective facials. I've also enjoyed mentoring passionate professionals who are seeking growth; It's been rewarding to see how they have already improved & look forward to connecting with more people. MY SECRET SAUCE: Build a strong brand and your business will soar. Take the time to put effort into the little details; they matter. Remember to rest. OUTLOOK IN 6 WORDS: Romanticize the little details and moments. EVERY DAY I AM THANKFUL FOR . . . My people. All my honeys. I have a pretty awesome village filled with supportive family and friends who are rooting for me. I know how rare that is and I have so much love for them. They make things better.

HONEYGLOW BY DEE AESTHETICS

*By appointment only* 2055 Wood St. | Suite 218 Sarasota, FL 34231 honeyglowbydee@gmail.com Instagram: @honeyglowbydee

STRONG WOMEN OF THE REGION

Best Aesthetician

LIZA CARDEN

OWNER, LG HOWARD & COMPANY

" Everyday I am thankful for how blessed I am.. Always maintain an attitude of gratitude."

THE STORY OF LIZA’S SUCCESS IS A BIT UNCONVENTIONAL. It begins with her as a teenager, a 15 year old freshman, struggling to get through school but with a dream in her heart. She knew that someday she wanted to be an entrepreneur but the thought of making it through high school and then onto college brought her to tears. She began researching duel enrollment programs in her town for cosmetology. While the idea seemed good, none of them felt like a good fit. Then one day she walked into an Aveda Institute and her heart danced. There was just one problem. It was an accredited college, not a duel enrollment. Shortly after her visit, she left high school classes and began studying for her GED, ready to embark on this new adventure. Liza passed her GED the month she turned 16 and started at Aveda a few weeks later.

After almost ten years in the industry Liza moved to Sarasota and decided it was time to make her dream a reality. She began doing the work to open her own salon. Just like her original dive into cosmetology, she began hitting roadblocks. At 25, as a first time business owner with no partners, no co-signers, next to no leverage to offer, she struggled. Most banks she went to for a loan weren’t interested, building after building turned her down as a tenet. No one wanted to take a chance. But all it takes is one. One bank. One building. After several months, she found just that. Of course, that is only the beginning of the journey of entrepreneurship. The last eight years have been a beautiful rollercoaster, that she wouldn’t change for the world. She believes the key to success is keeping the faith and always persevering. THE MISSION OF LG HOWARD & COMPANY is to provide a place people can come to, not just to get their hair done, but to have an experience that renews their mind, body, and spirit. Each service includes complimentary massage and mimosa or Aveda Comforting Tea, as well as a finished style that will leave you feeling fabulous. The LGH team is highly trained in their craft through quarterly education to ensure their guests are always getting the very best.

LG HOWARD & COMPANY

8620 S Tamiami Trail

941-702-5390 | lghowardsalon.com

Instagram: @lghowardsalon

LOTUS AESTHETICS & WELLNESS

240 N Washington Blvd | Suite 480 Sarasota, FL 34236

941-441-4744 | lotussrq.com

AMANDA CHAMP

OWNER, SURFING COCONUT

CHELSEA VACCA

OWNER, LOTUS AESTHETICS & WELLNESS

OF THE REGION

" It’s all okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end."

MY JOURNEY BEGAN YOUNG, driven by a fascination with science that sparked my dream of a medical career at a young age. Despite navigating diverse cultural norms in my household due to my Egyptian heritage, I persevered. I graduated high school early, self-funded my nursing degree with honors, and now proudly completing my 10th year in the medical field, three of which have been leading my own thriving aesthetic practice—a dream come true. A PERSONAL EXPERIENCE THAT FUELS MY MOTIVATION was the challenge of working full-time while putting myself through my undergraduate and graduate degrees. Those challenges have instilled in me a deep appreciation for hard work, resilience, and staying composed under pressure. It was the driving force behind my professional success. MY SECRET SAUCE is the authenticity of being unapologetically myself. This approach has allowed me to harness my strengths, connect genuinely with others, and create a unique impact that resonates on a personal and professional level. Pursue passions, embrace challenges, savor achievements. EVERYDAY I AM THANKFUL FOR the work-life balance I have created, allowing me to spend quality time with my patients, but also quality time with my friends and family.

"Our secret sauce is hard work. Its important to work hard. to provide the highest quality and freshest product to our customers.

THE SURFING COCONUT STARTED OVER THREE YEARS AGO ON ANNA MARIA ISLAND. My love for coconuts started decades ago. I've always been a huge fan of coconut water. While living in central America I drank several coconuts a day to stay hydrated. The health benefits are magical. I moved to Florida in 2016 and took a job as a traveling chef for festivals and shows all over the state. After Covid hit, my shows were cancelled. I decided that I wanted to sell coconuts on the beach. They do this in Hawaii and other tropical places I've been to, yet there were no fresh custom branded coconuts being sold on the beach on Anna Maria Island and surrounding areas. We introduced this area to fresh premium custom branded coconuts. That’s when the Surfing Coconut was born. I started my small, female-owned business at the beach market at Coquina Beach. I designed my logo and stamped it on the coconuts. The response to the Surfing Coconut was amazing! Since then, we have added the Market at LWR and this year we are adding even more. We can also set up our Coco Bar at weddings and corporate events. This allows us to open the coconuts and serve them fresh to your guests. We can also put your personal logo on a coconut. We are so grateful that we are able to share our love for coconuts with our community. Keeping people hydrated is the best job in the world. We love setting up and opening our fresh coconuts for weddings and events. If you want to wow your guests at your next event give us a call. THE SURFING COCONUT CAN BE FOUND AT THE COQUINA BEACH MARKET WEDNESDAYS AND FRIDAYS FROM 10 AM - 4 PM AND THE MARKET AT LWR ON SUNDAYS FROM 10 AM - 2 PM.

SURFING COCONUT

Pricing/Events: 310-922-7148

surfingcoconut.com

Facebook: Surfing Coconut | Instagram: surfingcoconutami

STRONG WOMEN OF THE REGION

KRISTIE SKOGLUND

PRESIDENT/CEO, THE FLORIDA CENTER FOR EARLY CHILDHOOD

" Mistakes are ok, but mediocrity isn’t "

SINGLE MOST SIGNIFICANT STRENGTH AND HOW YOU UTILIZED IT TO MAKE A POSITIVE IMPACT WITHIN AN ORGANIZATION OR COMMUNITY LEADERSHIP ROLE: Humility has been instrumental in creating a more inclusive working environment. I am the first to acknowledge that I don't have all the answers. By embracing different perspectives and actively listening, I have fostered a culture of respect, collaboration, and diversity. This has not only enhanced my own learning and growth but has also contributed to the overall success and well-being of the organization. WHAT IS YOUR SECRET SAUCE? Embracing vulnerability. Being vulnerable in relationships allows me to be my authentic self instead of trying to please others or being who others want me to be. EVERY DAY I AM THANKFUL FOR who I am and the opportunity to pursue all that I want to become.

THE FLORIDA CENTER FOR EARLY CHILDHOOD

4620 17th Street | Sarasota, FL 34235

941-371-8820 | thefloridacenter.org Facebook: facebook.com/TheFloridaCenter Instagram: @thefloridacenter

Strong women take the helm of cultivating business, a racting and retaining visitors and curating the complex network of our regional economy.

OUR REGION’S LIONESSES

interviewed by wes roberts | compiled by barbie heit

FIFTY YEARS AGO THERE WOULD’VE BEEN NO WOMEN AT THE TABLE, AND NOW WE HAVE A TABLE FILLED WITH WOMEN. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? BRITTANY LAMONT, PRESIDENT/CEO, LAKEWOOD RANCH BUSINESS ALLIANCE: I think it means change, evolution and opportunity. It means I think a realization of where women fall in the workplace and where women fall in leadership roles. It may be happening in this community, but it’s still not happening nationwide. But it’s nice that locally, the tides have turned a bit, and that people see that women should be in leadership positions like this. JACKI DEZELSKI, PRESIDENT AND CEO, MANATEE CHAMBER OF COMMERCE Should it mean anything? Or is it simply a signal of, as you said, where our community and our region has headed in recognizing leadership. It would be an interesting data point to know collectively the amount of tenure in our industry that’s around this table. All of us have been engaged for years and been supported by amazing people. SHARON HILLSTROM, PRESIDENT AND CEO, BRADENTON AREA ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT CORPORATION I would say though that we do see a lot of women in leadership roles in nonprofits in our region, we don’t see them necessarily in roles of for-profit companies. In the for-profit sector, you’re not seeing women ascend to those CEO positions as you are in the nonprofit sector. I think that’s why you have all women here because we’re all nonprofits. Although it shouldn’t matter because we’re running businesses, whether you’re a nonprofit or you’re a for-profit organization.

This page, left to right: Sharon Hillstrom, President and CEO, Bradenton Area Economic Development Corporation and Erin Duggan, President and CEO, Visit Sarasota County. Opposite Page: Brittany Lamont, President/CEO, Lakewood Ranch Business Alliance; Erin Silk, CECD, President & CEO, Economic Development Corporation of Sarasota County; Jacki Dezelski, IOM, President and CEO, Manatee Chamber of Commerce; and, Heather Kasten, President and CEO, Greater Sarasota Chamber of Commerce.

Our region has been recognized for strong leadership and lucky for us, some of the strongest female leaders in the area recently took the time to gather together for a roundtable discussion with Wes Roberts at our studio. Read on to learn what it’s like to balance life as an inspiring leader with the demands of motherhood and family and find out why these are the Women Who Roar in our community.

OUR REGION’S LIONESSES

WHEN WE STARTED SRQ NOW 25 YEARS AGO, PRESIDENT AND EDITOR-IN-CHIEF LISL LIANG, RECOUNTS THAT SHE HAD POWERFUL WOMEN OF THE ERA WARN HER THAT “IT WAS GOING TO BE TOUGH, BECAUSE OF THE ‘GOOD OL’ BOY NETWORK,” BUT THE STORY SHE SHARES IS THAT SHE WAS WIDELY WELCOMED BY THE LEADERS OF THAT ERA; IN PARTICULAR SHAUN MERRIMAN, TOM DABNEY AND JOHN CRANOR. HER EXPERIENCE SEEMED QUITE DIFFERENT THAN THE WOMEN WHO HAD BEEN THE “CEILING BREAKERS” OF THE PREVIOUS GENERATION. HILLSTROM: I was speaking with a former CEO of a major corporation not too long ago, who’s probably 80 now, and she made this statement: “I broke through the glass ceiling and when I got there, there weren’t any other women there.” From a generational standpoint, obviously things have progressed. Depending upon which sector of business you might be in it may still exist, but there’s no question it’s getting better.

HEATHER KASTEN, PRESIDENT AND CEO, GREATER SARASOTA CHAMBER OF COMMERCE: I spent several years in pharmaceuticals with Lilly, and the top executives all the way down to the regional managers were males, but then all the sales reps were female. If you look around this town, it is women running the nonprofits, and yet if you do look at the for-profits, it is primarily male-dominated. That includes banks, manufacturing and technology companies.

HILLSTROM: If you go outside of our region, if you look at startup activity across the country or even in the world, there are a lot of women doing startups-probably because they had to in order to maybe ascend to that position. Here we have so much change happening so quickly with so many new people moving here, coming from other areas, bringing different ideologies. I think we’re in a period of time where we will see more women maybe ascending to those roles or bringing companies here. LAMONT: The Chamber of Commerce industry has definitely evolved from being as maledominant at the top. When the women at this table started in the Chamber world, it was all male. The EDCs are still very male dominated. ERIN DUGGAN, PRESIDENT AND CEO, VISIT SARASOTA COUNTY: If I look up the coast, it’s pretty much all men that are the DMO leaders. I

just got back from a conference in Savannah, and nearly all the DMO presidents were male. There is a generational change happening, I had a strong mother growing up. She was an executive with FCCI, so all I ever knew was that women worked and they ran businesses. I’ve got two teenage boys, I think my children have always known, their grandmother had a big job, mom’s got a big job, dad’s got a big job. It could be a shift that people are starting to accept [women business leaders] because that’s what they grew up seeing. ERIN SILK, CECD, PRESIDENT AND CEO, ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT CORPORATION OF SARASOTA COUNTY: This group—having visible women in leadership—I see it attracting more women to bring or start businesses in this region. Particularly in the tech startup, we’re meeting women who have relocated here. There’s one in particular I was meeting with the other day, Jake Rubin, with MamaZen. She launched a mental health app for mothers. She’s from LA and she told me that the reception that she’s gotten here in Sarasota as a woman in tech and a woman founder is so much more welcoming than what she had

“This

DUGGAN: I may have started 10, even 15 years earlier than you. There was a lot of change in that time period. Behaviors that are no longer accepted. I have some stories. HILLSTROM: Oh, I do too. LAMONT: Motherhood is a whole different subset during this. There’s way more judgment on being a mom than being a woman. It’s one thing to be a woman, you have shown that you deserve your role. But despite that, some would think, “Oh, but you are a mom. Can you do this? Do you have that kind of bandwidth? Can you raise kids?” DUGGAN: That still exists. I think women are harder on women than men are for the whole motherhood thing though. LAMONT: And that could be a generational thing too. DUGGAN: In the last year I couldn’t get over how many people would say to me, “Oh, you probably don’t want Virginia [Haley]’s job, because you’re a mom. And I said, ell, first of all, Virginia’s a mom, and she was younger than me when she started, and her daughter was younger than my children when she started as the president and CEO. Second of all, I don’t know what you think my responsibilities were as Vice-President,

group–having visible women in leadership–i see it attracting more women to bring or start businesses in this region.” —Erin Silk, EDC of Sarasota County

experienced there. DEZELSKI: There are female leaders and male leaders that are blazing trails here on the Suncoast, and this table is filled with rockstar women leaders, and it’s incumbent upon all of us to ensure that we’re going to pay it forward with the mentoring that we’ve all had. To pay forward the support that we’ve all had, and to honor the generation prior to us that built and broke through glass ceilings and forged the path. So that, Erin, your boys don’t know it any other way than there being equal opportunity for women and men to reach the top leadership positions in organizations. LAMONT: In my personal experience, think about what you shared on Lisl’s behalf earlier, I haven’t felt like this community has viewed me differently because I was a woman. Age is a whole different topic, but I don’t think it was “you’re a woman so you couldn’t be put in these positions.” I think there has always been a level of male support from community leaders, as long as I have been pursuing my career.

but I think most people would tell you the VP does more than the president. That’s part of earning your stripes. KASTEN: Going back, even ten years ago, I do think there was some elbowing [between women] to get to the front of the line because it was so hard to achieve these roles. What I’ve seen over the last couple years of my career is women coming alongside other women, genuinely helping, being a mentor, being a support, being an encourager where I know I didn’t really see that when I was coming up the ranks. HILLSTROM: I think there were stereotypes. This woman that I spoke with said the same things; “Why would you even want to have a career; you have two children, you have a husband that earns a lot of money It is this stereotype that you should fit in this particular box and don’t go outside of that. The women that did were so brave because society questioned their choices very directly, meanwhile nobody said to a man, “Hey, you’re a dad. Why do you also have to be

a professional?” SILK: It still happens. I am so proud of my family unit. I have a five-and-ahalf-month-old, and my husband is a stay-athome dad. I get the uestion all the time, And what does your husband do He’s a disabled veteran, a proud veteran. verybody in our circle knows he’s a stay-at-home dad, but when we’re out in public, for instance, we’re at a restaurant, and if the baby’s getting grumpy or something, he’s the first one to pick her up and be bouncing her around. eople come up and say, ow, he’s such a great dad. They don’t know that he’s with her all through the week, they think he is a great dad because he’s holding her in the restaurant. The bar is set so low. I’m like, No, he actually is a really, really great dad, all the time. e’re proud of how our partnership works, and how we’re raising our daughter, and it’s working really, really well for us. [My experience helps with how I lead at the , it is important to support our employees who are mothers and fathers, but now even more so as we look at bringing new staff people on, I tell them, you are a full person before you are an employee . You have a family, you have kids, and we recognize that you’re a full person first. I take pride in being able to give that to other people, whereas years ago, I don’t think I would’ve been in the same situation. LAMONT: As a mom to young kids, I see it. ork used to be something that happened from - , but what does life look like holistically for employees and their families e all need to show up to the stuff for our kids, sit in the car. For women to continue to evolve in leadership positions there needs to be more of that e ibility. You might be taking meetings in the car line, picking up your kids. It is a struggle every day. And in this role they need you after 00. You’re also taking calls from a board member pm at night. You’re on all the time, but then there’s space in between for you still to feel like you can do the mom thing. If my husband shows up to jiu-jitsu, with all three of the kids, he’s a hero. But if I am wrangling all three kids, I hear, h, you got your hands full, don’t you KASTEN: There can be guilt. I did take a five-year time out in my professional career to raise the kids. I saw both sides. hen I was working and putting on the suit, I would see the stay-at-home mom in her yoga pants and I would be like, an, she’s such a good mom. She probably went in and had coffee with the teacher and did yoga, and then she’s probably going somewhere for lunch with a friend. I thought that, and then when I was that mom in the yoga pants, I would see the

woman come in all gussied up heading to a meeting. I’d think, ow, she’s important. She’s making something happen today. hat am I making happen today I’m going to go run copies at the elementary school.”

THERE IS A WELL-WORN SAYING ABOUT “HAVING IT ALL.” CAN WOMEN HAVE IT ALL? OR MAYBE THE QUESTION SHOULD BE, CAN ANYONE HAVE IT ALL? HILLSTROM: It depends on what your all is. I think what you have to think about is when. So you can’t have it all, all the time. You may have it all at different stages of your life. I view life as different chapters. I worked out of college, then I was a stay-at-home mom, then I worked to get back into the professional world, which was really hard by the way. It was not easy at all. Because here’s what happens when you’re out of the workforce, even though you’ve been productive and doing things, people look at you, You’ve been out of the workforce. hat did you do And many employers don’t place any value on that whatsoever. But if I look at my career, my life, I feel like I’ve had it all. It didn’t always happen when I thought it was going to happen, but that’s what I say to women all the time. Always be open to the potential that it could change never ever put those bookends on your life because you never know what the future has to hold and you always should be open for opportunities that might come your way. KASTEN: In any chapter, what does success look like Is it sitting on a board. Is it a certain amount of money? Is it attending all of my kids’ activities eally defining success, whatever chapter you’re in, because I think that definition changes with each chapter. Be intentional about how do I define success And then being at peace with that. DUGGAN: I’m sure in my twenties and my thirties, and probably even the first half of my forties, you wish for the ne t promotion, you wish for your kids to be out of this icky stage. And I remember my mom used to always tell me, You’re going to wish your life away. So I haven’t done that in a long time. So to me, I try to be very grateful for what I have today, but I think it’s fun to not have it all because then that’s what makes you want to get up and do better and strive for something new ne t year. And I think too, who would’ve thought prior to the time we are in now, things like picking up kids in car lines, that wouldn’t have ever own prior to the pandemic. The pandemic showed we need to value the

employees that we have that are hardworking. e don’t want to lose them over something as petty as not letting them take a 4 -minute break in the afternoon to get a kid. You’re a good employee, you can do whatever you want pretty much all day as long as you get your work done. In our o ce too that it’s not just kids. It’s dogs, it’s parents, it’s grandparents, it’s spouses. Not one entity is more important than another. y mom used to say, everybody has 24 hours a day. Your time’s not more important than my time or vice versa. veryone chooses to spend their 24 hours however they want.

LAMONT: It could just be the phase of my life with young kids, but it’s never do you have it all It’s closer to the saying You’re always failing at one thing. ither it’s your marriage or career or your kids. It’s always changing what comment did my kid make today that makes me feel like a supermom r what fight did you have with your spouse makes you feel like you’re not a good wife r does a board member want something from you that you couldn’t deliver You have 24 hours a day, and you have to be okay with not being 100 percent at everything every day. aybe today you’re giving a hundred percent to your job and you’re giving 0 percent to your family, and that sucks, but then tomorrow you’re taking the day off and you’re giving 100 percent to your family.

SILK: A lot of what I’m hearing is it’s also about perspective. If you ask me do I feel like I have it all I feel like I have it all. ight now, I really do. f course there are really, really hard times, and there are really big challenges in all three of those aspects. But when I look at my life in totality, the perspective I have is that I have it all, and it’s a beautiful life. It’s about perspectives. e had an event last night, and before I came to the event, I gave the baby a bath. I had 20 minutes, and I said to my husband, Let me give her a bath and put her in her pjs. Then I got dressed and then I came to the event. That’s the balance that you do. You try to keep your positivity and be thankful and grateful through it. HILLSTROM: I can say this because I have grown children now, but it goes by so fast. nce they’re out of high school and they go to college, it zooms by. All of a sudden they’re 22, and you’re like, what happened to those four years It takes your breath away. hen I dropped my son and my daughter off at college, I bawled. SILK: I cry now thinking about her going to college. oes she have to go KASTEN: efinitely enjoy the journey. There’s

no pinnacle point where we get to the top of the mountain and say, “Okay, now everything is perfect.” I’m with you, Sharon. We have three grown kids, and when they got their licenses at 16-I really felt the loss of control. They could be doing anything they wanted to be doing.

IT SEEMS TO ME THAT THE TALK OF WORKLIFE BALANCE IS SOMETHING THAT BOTH MEN AND WOMEN TAKE MORE SERIOUSLY TODAY. DEZELSKI: I know that you and Lisl have shared those roles with your company. The opportunity for Lisl to have a top role has allowed you to have more bandwidth as a parent, likely, vice versa.

IT TAKES TEAMWORK, LISL WAS PRESIDENT OF OUR COMPANY AND ALSO SERVING AS BOARD CHAIR AT THE SARASOTA CHAMBER I THINK WHEN OUR FIRST BABY WAS TWO YEARS OLD. LAMONT: She brought baby ri n to the board meeting

THAT’S LEADERSHIP! OK, A QUESTION THEN, THERE’S ALL THESE SAYINGS LIKE “YOU LEAD FROM THE FRONT”, “YOU LEAD FROM THE BACK”, “YOU LEAD FROM DEMONSTRATION”, “YOU LEAD FROM MOTIVATION”. WHAT MAKES FOR EFFECTIVE GOOD LEADERSHIP? DEZELSKI: All four of the things you mentioned, two being opposite sides of the same coin and the other two, the answer is there’s a time and place for nuance within your style of leadership, what your team needs, what your constituents need, what your board needs. What do the people you are leading need at that time? Do they need you to take the step back and push them forward? Do they need you to be decisive and be leading from the front? DUGGAN: We spend a lot of time on our team going through this at our retreats with our staff. very year we will bring in the colors exercise, so at the end of it, everyone hopefully will appreciate that you are a blue and I’m a green and you need this and I need that, but we both add value. And, adjusting to the moment; we call it reading the room, and I’d say that’s the hardest thing to teach. We’re trying to teach our high school son to read the room in social conversations at Thanksgiving dinner. Like “That wasn’t appropriate. Did you see grandma’s face? She didn’t particularly care for you saying that, but yet you dug in and just kept on.” I’ve experienced that with staff too, that you are not reading the room,

you are beating a dead horse. Give-and-take and reading the room and figuring out what’s needed when. I think it’s tough, and some people can’t do it, but I think that’s how you get to the pinnacle of the mountain.

ALL OF YOU ARE LEADERS TO YOUR STAFF, BUT THEN ALSO YOU HAVE TO ANSWER TO BOARDS. LAMONT: Members, investors, all of them. A lot of moving parts.

HOW DO YOU BALANCE THOSE DYNAMICS?

SILK: Listening is a big one, and I don’t think you can be successful without being a good listener. I try to listen first. LAMONT: It’s a delicate dance based on who you’re interacting with. I think there’s a certain level of toughness that comes with it too, of like, you’ll deal with whatever hard situation, but you also, 20 minutes after that have to get on a stage and go present in front of 300 people, and it doesn’t matter what happened with the staff five minutes before that. There is a certain emotional toughness that I think you have to develop, of one, not ever taking things personally and two, of just being able to roll with it and move on. That’s I think the one thing that maybe I’ve learned is whatever happens, just keep moving. Just keep moving.

HILLSTROM: I think resiliency is super important, especially when you’re answering to so many different factions. I have this post-it note that says “respond versus react.” So take a breath before you respond to something that’s been said. I just think treating people the way you want to be treated. Respect is so important. I’m the same person all the time. I don’t have a certain persona here and a different persona there, so I know who I am, and so that’s what I present, and so I’m comfortable in that. DEZELSKI: The art of diplomacy. We’ve all mentioned it in one way or another, even in other questions that you’ve asked us this morning already. The art of diplomacy, and yes, some of that has to be built by experience. HILLSTROM: I also say humor. I like to plug humor in almost every aspect of my life. There’s a lot of laughter in my o ce. I think it just cuts through stress and all those kinds of things.

A CHALLENGE

THAT COMES FROM HAVING A HIGH LEVEL OF LEADERSHIP IN THE COMMUNITY IS THAT YOU ALSO HAVE A HIGH LEVEL OF VISIBILITY. PEOPLE THINK THAT’S A GOOD THING, BUT IT ALSO MEANS

THAT YOU CAN’T BE ANONYMOUS AND JUST GO GET THE SHOPPING DONE. DEZELSKI: None of us can go to Publix on Saturday morning without running into someone who was a stakeholder or constituent, but it comes with the territory, and that’s a known part of the job, and you’re willing to recognize and handle that. HILLSTROM: How about every time you go to SRQ Airport, getting on an airplane, and you walk down the aisle, and you are saying,”Oh, hi.” Oh, hi” “Oh, hi.” DUGGAN: And that’s when your kid will have a temper tantrum. DEZELSKI: Or you’re drinking a bloody Mary at 10:00 AM. Oh,” you say, “it’s just tomato juice.” DUGGAN: While your child’s having that temper tantrum.

HILLSTROM: That’s why you need it. LAMONT: None of us would do it if we weren’t so passionate about the work we do. I mean that’s what drives you is you believe in your mission, you believe in what you’re contributing to the community. You’re not making plastics every day, you’re transforming a community.

KASTEN: Going back to what Sharon said about e perience, and the confidence you have to build for it. I felt so much pressure when I took the job at the Sarasota Chamber, and all the media said, The first woman in a hundred years to run this organization I was like, h my God, womanhood riding on my shoulders. I cannot screw this up for the female species.” There were so many times I would just go in my o ce and close the door and I would let myself talk. I would be like, You are going to figure this out. Just take a deep breath, go back out there, shoulders back, chin up, buttercup, make it happen.” We’re fast forward now coming up on my fifth year. Now there’s nothing that anybody says, that walks in the door, that is going to surprise me. I’m just at peace, and you just have a sense of, “Okay, I do know what I’m doing.” That anxious, tight feeling of not wanting to let anybody down, it does pass. HILLSTROM: It’s always being open to learning. I used to be really hard on myself. “I can’t believe I didn’t know that,” I would say to myself. So I’m more comfortable now saying “I need to have you explain that to me, because I don’t understand what that means.” That took me a long time to get there because I always felt like I had to know everything—but you don’t have to know everything, and it makes you more human when you admit you don’t.

SHE ROARS