Funny Quotes sruthanquotes.com/2019/07/funny-quotes.html July 17, 2019
Funny Quotes: Hi everyone, today we come back with amazing and entertainment quotes, that's quotes name is Funny Quotes. Guys your free time happily spending with these quotes. We have all heard that love is kind, but have you ever thought about how hilariously funny love and romantic relationships can be as well. Hilarious Best Quotes from comedians that perfectly describe your crazy relationships. Related Quotes 10000+Quotes Love Quotes Motivational Quotes Sad Quotes Inspirational Quotes Good Quotes Powerful Quotes Romantic Quotes Best Quotes Friendship Quotes
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I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure.
may the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house?
Folks, I don't trust children. They're here to replace us.
Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
Life Is short, smile while you still have teeth.
It's okay If you don't like me. Not everyone has good taste.
Bigamy is having one husband too many. Monogamy is the same.
Some people are like clouds. When they disappear It's a beautiful day.
I'm not arguing. I'm simply explaining why I'm right. 2/12
I had an extremely busy day. converting oxygen Into carbon dioxide.
My phone's low battery warning Is the only warning I take seriously.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
Life would be tragic if It weren't funny.
If we're not meant to have midnight snacks, why Is there a light in the fridge?
Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206.
Dear heart, please stop getting Involved In everything. Your job is to pump blood that's It.
I never make the same mistake twice. I make It five or Six times, just to be sure.
If lying was a job, I know some people that would be billionaires. 3/12
I hate It when I'm singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.
I try to be a nice person but sometimes my mouth doesn't want to cooperate!
Life Is Hard: It's harder If you're stupid.
To be old and wise, you must first be young and stupid.
Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, You're drunk.
Life doesn't have any hands, but It can sure give you a slap sometimes.
One day you're the best thing since sliced bread. the next you're roast.
I made a huge to-do list for today. I just can't figure out who's going to do it.
At the end of the day life should ask us are you sure you want to save the changes? 4/12
Life Is short. smile while you still have teeth.
With great power comes great electricity bill.
people say nothing Is Impossible, but I do nothing every day.
87% of young people have back pain.
You call them to swear words. I call them to sentence enhancers.
I don't believe In reincarnation, and I didn't believe In It when I was a hamster.
I don't always talk on the phone, but when I do, I walk everywhere In my house.
I know I'm a handful but that's why you got two hands.
Sometimes I can't tell If I'm In preschool or high school.
I came, I saw, and I forgot what I was doing.
5/12
The great pleasure In life Is doing what people say you cannot do.
Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.
life is a soap, and you're a fork. Try drinking It now.
When I count my blessings, I count you twice.
Every day I arrive at work with good Intentions and a great attitude.
I won't be Impressed with technology until I can download food.
It's just a bad day, not a bad life.
The only reason I'm fat Is that a tiny body couldn't store all this personality.
Life's three best teachers; heartbreaks, empty pockets, failures. 6/12
You are lucky as shift If you got the person you want.
I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you.
I'm not lazy I'm just on my energy saving mode.
Age is of no importance unless you're a cheese.
You don't meet people by accident. There's always a lesson or a blessing.
When people ask dumb questions, I feel obligated to give sarcastic answers.
Life always offers you a second chance. It's called tomorrow.
In order to carry a positive action, we must develop here a positive vision.
Life is a one time offer, use it well. 7/12
Of course, I talk to myself. sometimes I need to expect advice.
Don't like me? cool, I don't wake up every day to impress you.
I try not to worry too much. Because nothing matters, but because everything does.
God made every person different... He got tired by the time he got to china.
My life feels like a test I didn't study for.
Embrace the glorious mess that you're.
Life is too short to remove USB safely.
At night I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't getup. k Always remember... Rumors are carried by haters, spread by fools, and accepted by Idiots. 8/12
Funning Inspirational quotes and sayings of all time.
Some days I amaze myself. Other days I put my keys in the fridge.
Life is too short to have boring hair.
Life would be tragic if It weren't funny.
It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.
Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need It most never use It.
Life is a soup and I'm a fork.
Life Isn't Fair. It's just fairer than death that's all.
We all know someone who speaks fluent shit.
9/12
At night, I can't sleep. In the morning, I can't wake up.
Avocado Toast would always text you back.
I won't be impressed with technology until I can download food.
Life Is funny If you don't laugh you're in trouble.
Maybe If we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it.
Being unique Is better... Than being perfect...
The truth will set you free, but first It will piss you off.
If you are living your life without giving an "f".
Some people ride the crazy train. I drive that mother fucker. 10/12
The best things In life are free. The second best are very expensive. To you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone, and a funny bone.
succeed in life,
Life's too short to drink bad wine.
It's okay If you don't like me. not everyone has good taste.
The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there Is In life to celebrate.
If I cut you Off. chances are, you handed me the scissors.
My life is a constant battle between my love of food and not wanting to be fat.
If you don't want a sarcastic answer, don't ask a stupid question.
When life knocks you down, roll over and look ar the stars.
If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine. It is lethal.
I'm actually not funny I'm just mean and people think I'm joking.
11/12
I usually don't get attached too easily, but that changed when I met you.
Not to brag but I don't even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.
Laugh at your problems everybody else does.
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
Happiness Is a Choice, a repetitive one.
Sometimes God removes things from our lives for our own protection. Trust in him.
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