Tips on how to improve your university application
Personal Statement workbook
Personal Statement workbook
This booklet is designed to help guide you through writing your personal statement, listing the key information you need to include. It all seems a little daunting when you first start to write your personal statement, but once you put pen to paper you soon realise it’s not; it gets easier. This booklet is packed with hints and tips on what needs to be included to help you get those university offers. Your personal statement is your chance to demonstrate who you are and why you are a suitable applicant to your chosen universities and their courses.
Universities receive thousands of applications every year and the personal statement can be used as a tool for selection. This is your opportunity on the application form to make yourself stand out from other applicants, therefore it’s crucial that you put the effort into producing an outstanding statement to ensure you get offered a place on your chosen courses.
Below: a Computer Games Design student
Points to include Discuss your chosen Course Explain why you chose the course(s). Admissions tutors suggest, overwhelmingly, that they want students to show enthusiasm about the subjects they want to study. Think about why this subject interests you and explain in detail.
The University Library
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Is it a direct path to your chosen career? You may want to be a teacher and wish to study a degree in education. It is here that you might talk about your career aspirations. Why have you chosen to pursue this career? What has influenced your decision?
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Show you have a good understanding of the course and you have done your research, for example, you know what modules you will be studying, any field trips involved, areas of the course you look forward to studying, work placement opportunities.
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Why does the subject interest you? Do you want to gain more knowledge in that area? Is it something you are passionate about? Are you already studying this subject, what do you enjoy about it, what skills have you learnt from it, essay writing, note taking, problem solving?
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You need to back up your interest by talking about what you have done to ensure this is the course for you. Have you read up on the profession, completed work experience, read additional text outside of the classroom?
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This may be a problem for those students who have opted for a diverse range of courses. However, advice from admissions tutors suggests you refer to each subject detailing why you are interested and how they are relevant subjects to your experience.
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If you are applying for a deferred entry then you might try to explain what you intend to do in the year between finishing your course and entering University.
Getting started When writing your personal statement, keep it clear and concise. Remember within your personal statement you only have: • •
47 lines 4000 characters (not words)
It may sound like plenty of space but you will find, as you write, it fills very quickly. Therefore, you need to ensure your key points stand out without repetition.
The Science Centre
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Show that you have skills suited to university life It is useful to show an admissions tutor that you have what it takes to survive the university experience. Probably without realising, you gain skills through your studies and in your own spare time. •
You may be the Class Representative at school or captain of a team – this evidence shows responsibility and commitment.
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You may work part-time – being punctual, balancing a part-time job with your studies and social life shows excellent timemanagement skills. Working part-time develops communication skills through working with different colleagues and customers. The role may be a position of trust, cash handling or key-holder, being able to work with minimum supervision and use initiative. What other activities do you do that help you gain these skills?
Forensic Science
Media Production student
Show examples of your personality Few people are incredibly outgoing, have travelled the world twice over, been captain of the hockey team and have completed a period of work experience in exactly the area suited to their chosen course of study. Be imaginative but honest about the things which you have experienced and how your interests or responsibilities may set you apart from other students. Try to be specific by providing detail or examples. Think about what you have already achieved and experienced. The Admissions Tutor will see what kind of person you are and how you will fit in at university. •
Are you involved in any team sports? How often do you train? Are you captain? Would you like to continue this at university through the Students’ Union teams? If so, have you already looked into this?
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Are you a volunteer for a charity? Do you help in your community? Are you a member of the Duke of Edinburgh’s Award? Have you been involved in the Prince’s Trust?
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Have you travelled anywhere exciting? How has this influenced you?
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Do you have any plans for your summer break before university that may be relevant to your chosen course?
Remember to use this guide to make your Personal Statement truly personal so do try to add your own sentences and do not restrict yourself to the suggestions made. You also need to be aware that UCAS has a Similarity Detection Service. This ensures that all statements are personally written and not copied from previous applications. Your statement will be checked against a statement library and web sources. Statements showing a potential level of similarity of 10% or greater, will be reviewed by the university and applicants will be notified. The university then makes the decision whether to consider the applicant for the applied course or to reject them. Finally, make sure that your statement is word perfect with no spelling or grammatical mistakes. Get someone to read through it with a fresh pair of eyes.
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To help you get started, fill in the boxes below with information about yourself that you can include in your personal statement
SUBJECTS – why chosen
SCHOOL/COLLEGE ACTIVITIES
WORK EXPERIENCE
SOCIAL ACTIVITIES
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Improving a Personal Statement
Part One: Current Personal Statement before amendments The following student has written a Personal Statement to support an application to read History. This is an early draft which needs improving I enjoy History lessons so I have decided to pursue the subject at degree level. At University I look forward to examining a range of historical sources. I am particularly interested in French history and trips to France have broadened my historical awareness. As a school prefect I hold many responsibilities organising and attending school functions, delivering speeches to the school body, being an active member of the school council, working effectively with other students. Having played in school concerts with the keyboard orchestra when I was in year nine, I have recently taken up piano lessons. I am a keen sports player and I am a member of the school hockey team, netball team, the athletics squad and the volleyball team, earning me the “Sports Personality of the Year” award. I have taught information technology skills to younger students and helped a particular student to overcome language difficulties. I have organised sports days and Christmas parties for the elderly: and written, directed and performed a series of short plays. I have always enjoyed reading but more recently my ‘A’ level studies have enabled me to explore foreign literature. Currently, I am involved in the European Youth Parliament Competition in which I will be representing my school at a residential debating conference. The winner will represent the United Kingdom in Cyprus. This venture enhanced my general knowledge (specifically of genetic engineering and drug legislation).
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Improving a Personal Statement
Part Two: The Improvement made The Personal Statement to read History has been broken down into a series of paragraphs with the ‘Before’ paragraph and the ‘After’ (or improved paragraph). Between these two paragraphs is an analysis of the strengths and weaknesses. Paragraph 1
Paragraph 3
Strengths • Does attempt to start with a reason about the choice of degree • Each sentence tries to offer a different point
Strengths • Presents an image of an active and well-rounded individual not just academic. • Valuable to include a reference to IT at some stage • Assisting other people presents another aspect of the student’s personality
Weaknesses • A more insightful reason might be used to explain the choice of course • Could state what the student wants out of the Degree • Could mention which areas of history are of interest • Words such as history are used twice in one sentence • The last sentence does not make sense as it does not link the two separate points
Weaknesses • Too many sentences begin the same way: they nearly all start with “I” • Useful to mention the skills gained from participating in team sports • Student is unlikely to have helped a child to completely overcome language difficulties • Could be more concise about work in the theatre
Paragraph 2 Strengths • Being in a position of responsibility is useful to mention (i.e. A school prefect) • examples are provided about the prefect duties • Provides an image of a student with varied interests (e.g. music) • Quite concise about the musical experience
Paragraph 4
Weaknesses • No mention of skills gained from being a school prefect • Problem in relating school prefect to musical Experience: it needs a phrase to link the two together • Omit the reference to Year Nine as it seems that the experience was too long ago to be relevant given the more recent responsibilities and experiences • Has learning the piano really sold the student!
Paragraph 5
Strengths • If reading is enjoyable then it is useful to state this in the Personal Statement
Strengths • Excellent to include role in an academic competition which involved public speaking • Useful to be specific: stating the issue discussed in the competition Weaknesses • The competition is important to mention but the prize is perhaps not so useful • No mention of the skills gained from having taken part in the competition • No link to the degree is made at the end of the paragraph i.e. no concluding statement
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Part Three: ‘The After Version’ Below is an improved version of the personal statement
I have always been fascinated by the past, beginning with childhood interests in time-travel and mythology. This interest continued with student exchanges to France and Germany, which gave me the opportunity to study 18th Century French history and dictatorship and to widen my historical scope. A trip to France, where I studied issues relating to the World Wars confirmed my interest in History and my decision to pursue the subject at degree level. At University I look forward to analysing varied interpretations of history and the original sources upon which they are based.
Currently, I am helping to produce a film for the European Student Travel Company concerning the career opportunities for young people in Europe. Also, I represented my school at national selection conference for the European Youth Parliament. This venture not only enhanced my general knowledge, but improved my teamwork, language and debating skills, which will be particularly useful for my course at university.
As a school prefect I have held many responsibilities such as organising school events, delivering speeches, and participating actively on the school council. The experience has taught me to use my own initiative and developed my skill of public speaking and diplomacy. I also involve myself fully with the school music performances. Having played in concerts with the keyboard orchestra, I have recently taken up piano lessons and gained a wider awareness of music, especially of Debussy and romanticism. Playing in various school sports teams has earned me several awards including that of “Sports Personality of the Year and taught me the importance of communication. teamwork and self-reliance. Organising a series of plays and other events for the elderly was a fulfilling challenge. I also found that the experience of assisting younger pupils with IT and language development was extremely rewarding I have always enjoyed reading, but more recently my ‘A’ level studies have enabled me to explore foreign literature. Brecht is particularly absorbing for his insight into the way people attempt to overcome the horrors of war.
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The following advice should help you write a Personal Statement which is easy to read and is professionally written. Read the following advice to help you connect your sentences and paragraphs together as well as help you vary the language you use in your Personal Statement.
Remember to make sure your Personal Statement is your own work - UCAS can identify if it isn’t
• In addition “In addition to my work experience I have gained valuable skills throughout my voluntary work” • As well as “As well as my involvement in team games I am also keen on playing individual competitive sport” • Reinforce “My involvement in the school voluntary programme has reinforced my decision to study a degree in Nursing” • Strengthen “My decision to study a degree in Economics has been strengthened by my enjoyment and success in my ‘A’ Level course.” • Furthermore “Furthermore, I am particularly suited to a degree in Chemistry because of my love for the subject and my keen interest to further my knowledge of the subject.” • Besides “Besides my involvement with sports I am also involved in amateur dramatics.” • Not to mention “Being involved in the voluntary work programme not to mention my work experience has provided an opportunity to work with a diverse range of people.”
Advice about using “I” Beginning many sentences with “I” is very easy to do, especially when writing about yourself. Instead try to create varied sentences with a range of alternative starting points: Do not write I am Captain of the Hockey Team I enjoy playing sport I am studying ‘A’ levels in I enjoy socialising I have taken part in I have gained a number of skills Instead write Being Captain of the Hockey team Having enjoyed playing football ………… My “A” level subjects have ………… Socialising is important to me because Taking part in ………… The skills I have gained from …………
HINT: When choosing your universities go along to their open days to see it for yourself
• More recently “Although I have taken part in classical music concerts, more recently I have decided to learn to play the piano.” • Enabled me “The opportunity to play in the school football team enabled me to work as part of a team.” • Provided me “The work experience provided me with an opportunity to work with a range of people.” • Opportunity to “The opportunity to work with people was provided by my work experience.”
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If you want to visit Staffordshire University we have a number of open days throughout the year. You can view these dates and book a place online www.staffs.ac.uk/opendays or call our team t: 01782 294400
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If you want to visit Staffordshire University we have a number of open days throughout the year. You can view these dates and book a place online www.staffs.ac.uk/opendays e: enquiries@staffs.ac.uk or call our team t: 01782 294400
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