Travels with Myself & Bike by Steph Weise

travels with myself and bike 1

Holland 24–35 Bristol to Dover 6–11 France into Belgium 12–23

France, back to Bristol 94–103

Denmark 44–55

Germany 36–43

Czech Republic 56–67

Bavaria 82–93

Austria, Slovakia & Hungary 68–81

Bristol to Dover 7

1ST APRIL, 2015 DAY 1: BRISTOL TO PATNEY My first day went too easily, I feel (after all the obvious crying, reassuring my parents, unrestful sleep and too much coffee, that is). First day with panniers on the front, first day navigating through areas I didn’t know— and not getting lost to boot. I followed the same route as my pal Adrian and went down some lovely canal cycle path all the way here. Little bit bumpy but no bags have fallen off yet. I think I did about 65 miles in total. I wonder how long it will take me to get bored of the enjoyment of knowing where I am on a map…A while, I think! People were always around willing to help if I looked a bit stumped, and as I passed one fella shouted ‘go careful on your way!’ which I headed. Another fella in a local pub thought I was both 18 and mad… I’ll take that. I’m writing this on my second day, which is my first day of following a route I totally don’t know, and am not entirely sure where I’m going to end up yet. Though I did have some pointers in the direction of some scenic routes courtesy of another guy called Andy, which is most useful! My legs haven’t totally died, it’s still not raining, and I slept in the most comfiest bed… Let’s see how it goes!

Wednesday, 1 April 2015 Day 2: Patney to Basingstoke (Hills and Roadkill) Survived April Fools day with zero jokes, besides the 'undulating' hills I encountered today. None too bad but I definitely feel it in my thighs now! Today I did about 50 miles. This is a nice amount, and leaves me the evenings to chat to people, stuff my face and PLAN PLAN PLAN the next day. I'm not yet relaxed enough to take it as it comes, but it's satisfying to have a plan go well. I feel like I'm spending 50% of my time looking at maps and remembering road names, and another 50 immediately forgetting them and grinning at birds. Today was wildlife day. Most, admittedly, crushed by cars. I miss cycle paths. Though I did have a great time cycling next day to flying buzzards. Where's my bird book? No mishaps yet. Occasionally feel lost but quickly rectifies itself. Have packed my bags wellâ&#x20AC;Ś Clothes and camping supplies in the two back bags, and toiletries and urgent things in the front. NOT TO MENTION my fetching bumbag (otherwise known as 'the party starter'). Tomorrow I intend on heading to Crawley. We'll see how I feel!

Friday, 3 April 2015 Day 4: Crawling to Crawley Yesterday was my day of everything going wrong. I got my first puncture straight after setting off from Basingstoke, probably spent ten miles being lost or going in the wrong direction, and got to campsite later than expected. More hills! I did some getting off and pushing (and a lot of swearing). Been on horrible A and B roads too. But it was okayâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; it wasn't raining (though it is nowâ&#x20AC;ŚWho needs to feel their toes?) First night of camping was easy enough. Set up my one man tent next to a huge mother tent and laughed at what little space I took up comparably. One man is plenty for me being the small female I am. Ate cold minestrone soup and did some hardcore laying down (all there's room for in my tent). Probably slept more peacefully without wifi because it meant I had no choice not to plan route! Met a great lady called Barbara yesterday and we chatted at length about how lovely everyone generally is and being females doing cycle tours! I feel there'll be a comparative lack of females along the way so I sure made the most of that. Today I'm following an already damp, torn Google map print out and I'm not entirely sure where I'm going, but I'll work it out soon. Not quite at Crawley yet. Hope to get proper past it today. Another skill of mine: buying a coffee then using WiFi for an hour. Beautiful, beautiful internet.

Saturday, 4 April 2015 Day 5: Beer & Breakdowns Oh god, this is hard work. I'm 35 miles from Dover but it feels like a million! Today's breakdown was caused by not knowing where I was gonna stay tonight on this busy bank holiday Saturday. As usual though, everything turns out fine. At a lovely campsite inâ&#x20AC;Ś Rovendon! Everywhere feels like bat shit nowhere. Today I navigated using photographs of some fellow campers maps, vague google phone maps and my pal in Bristol being my internet and looking up accommodation for me. Do not follow this advice. It's shit, but somehow getting me there! Slower than expected. Don't mind though; I caught a train yesterday cos I was fed up of fuckin A roads, but I'm pretending I'm not proud enough not to let that bother me. I nearly ran over a squirrel today and shit a brick. This is important. I'm leaving behind me a trail of people who think I'm nuts. I haven't spoke to anyone my age since leaving. There's a happy old dog in this pub. This is my first beer. I washed my hair today. Onwards.

Oh god, this is hard work 11

Sunday, 5 April 2015 Day 6: Fucking Dover I'm bloody here! Staying in a bloody bed! Yesterday I was looking up trains from a place called Tenterden, but today's ride was actually fairly easy because I planned the shit out of it last night. And also because I was mostly following cycle route 2, though like most routes this is terribly sign posted and in and out of dog shit terrain. The wind was also all up in my grill along the coast, and there were a few hills (I pushed someâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; pushing is the same speed as cycling anyway!). There were lots of Sunday cyclists out today, everywhere I stopped I was afraid people would confuse me for one. These last few days I probably only did around 40 miles a day, but god knows how much I covered in sheer inadequacy of following routes. Fuck knows what there is to do in Dover. I've got tomorrow free to apologise to my feet and perhaps make myself clean and townfriendly. It's a bit odd to be around town people already. It also feels odd not to sleep next to my bike. May request her a bed too.

France into Belgium 15

Tuesday, 7 April 2015 France: Hooray for Calais I was dreading everything about the ferry to Calaisâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; the ride around Dover's port, the ride from the other port to be the place I'm staying, not knowing what I'm doing and getting crushed by lorries. But I survived. Of course. I've had two days off cycling now (I'm pretending it's a weekend) and one ankle is a bit sore from a previous hike, but I'm hoping the flat route to Belgium will be easy enough. I'm gonna high tail it out of this odd port town as soon as the sun's up. I'm queen of 6am. Dover was also quite odd. Luckily I made friends and at least had a walk around ye olde cliffs. I mostly enjoyed Dover as a place to clean up my bike chain and wash my clothes. Party. I'm too embarrassed to speak French so the baguette eating has already begun. I feel like such a ragamuffin walking around towns in my light weight, no-bull wardrobe. Excited to get on bike again where the mind's nicely occupied, even if a bit scared about being on the wrong side of the road and converting to KM. It'll be fine!

i 16

Wednesday, 8 April 2015 Belgium ('are we there yet?') Today was a slog from Calais across the border of Belgium. Didn't stop anywhere around Dunkirk etc because I just so desperately wanted to be out of France! Took me ages to get out of Calais, and every smaller town I'd pass through on the way up I got a little stuck in after losing sign posts. Other notes on the journey up: the only route I could find that was quick was along D roads, which I've decided are basically A roads in that there's no cycle lanes and they never end. Horrendous. Nothing to look at besides my feet or the KM slowly adding up. The most interesting things I saw today were a dead cat on the road and how many freckles have developed on my face after a proper look in the mirror. Oh, and my first Belgian-looking town,Veurne. I'm staying in a place called Adinkirke because it's close and I cycled too far being hopeless. For reference, I wouldn't do the journey from Calais again. I was just too stubborn to get the first train (which might be a better idea). The route's not made for bikes, â&#x20AC;&#x201D; in fact I nearly cried when I seen my first Belgian cycle path.

Crossing borders is overwhelmingly underwhelming Crossing borders is overwhelmingly underwhelming. I took a quick seat, applied some Vaseline, and got the fuck on. In better news, I had a nice time in Calais, met an artist called Dorothee, cycled around a fort and ate falafel. Positives!

Thursday, 9 April 2015 Belgium: Veurne to Oostend Today wasn't supposed to be a long trip, but as usual I managed to make it one! I think it's actually a skill.Veurne was a fantastic little place to start; I slept like a baby, took my time packing up then stopped in the town for a coffee. It was pretty but slow moving and not intimidating. It also had a very musical town clock. I then headed up the coast generally along the LF1. Sometimes so sparce it was no wonder I got lost cos there were no reference points on the landscape! Took it slow… Had no choice with northerly wind though! Then suddenly landed in Oostend, which was busier than I expected a seaside town to be! Had to go a little further to get to a campsite but tomorrow it shouldn’t be a problem to find LF1 to Bruges. Camping’s okay but definitely the loneliest of accommodations! The one man tent exacerbates this. I’m never really more than a day’s ride from town’s and hostels though so I don’t mind too much. I’m enjoying being outside all day, though I’m getting the factor 50 on my face cos I don’t want skin cancer or to come home looking like the Old Man and the Sea.

Friday, 10 April 2015 Begium: Around Bruges? I found Bruges got a lot of stick, but arriving yesterday from my odd little seaside town Oostend, I was just chuffed to be in civilisation. People would say 'its really touristy!' But hey, I'm a fucking tourist. I woke up early and got here at lunch time, which made a nice change! Though arriving at peak lunch when all the tourists are eating made me feel like an attraction myself. Why are people so surprised to see a white girl on a bike with lots of bags?? I thought people would be less surprised here what with such fantastic cycle networks. So I don’t really care for the attractions of Bruges, but was very happy to hear English again and to be able to engage in small talk. I think lots of people assume I’m French. I can do bonjour…. I ambled about, drank coffee and beer and had an interesting time. I got to talk about music and enjoyed Western humour again.

Today I think I’ll take the LF5 to Ghent, and stay for tonight and maybe tomorrow, leaving for the direction of Antwerp afterwards… Maybe a little slower once I check the KM. Everything takes longer than I think it will. This is my new rule number one!

Sunday, 12 April 2015 Belgium: Ghent Ghent's great; as I write this I'm in a bike cafe that's playing just Fleetwood Mac, so I'm chuffed (even if a total cafe asshole). Yesterday I left Bruges without rushing too much, and arrived at about 1pm. The weather was discouraging but the wind was behind me so I flew (hearing Gandalf telling me to FLY YOU FOOL the whole way). Followed the LF5 and it felt like my best, easiest day of cycling yet. Ghent is like what Glasgow is to Edinburghâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; the cooler, less populated cousin of Bruges. I rode in past 'fuck the police' graffiti, there's a design museum, and bikes! And cafes! Oddly enough I had to camp last night due to all the hostels being full, but the campsite's still pretty close to the center. Plus it was cheap as fuck and I showered, so who cares. Best thing about camping is sleeping in all my clothes and waking up pretty much good to go after a quick brush down. I have low hygiene standards. This is convenient. Tomorrow I think I head for Antwerp. I've yet to check the KM. I've already heard one too many 'high in Amsterdam' storied so I'm making a mental note to avoid it on the weekend. I can't cope with puberty-fresh kids trying to find themselves through drugs. I've established myself as an asshole without them. Ghent's got a book market that puts shame on Bristol's harbour side! I've not been far but this is my top place as of yet.

Tuesday, 14 April 2015 Belgium: 120 km to Antwerp It's fair to say yesterday's ride was an underestimation. The problem with following the cycle routes is that they're longer, but the off road benefits out weigh this. Besides the mileage the ride was a stunner; through nature reserves, following the river Schelde (the simplest route I still managed to fuck up). It took me far too long to get out if Ghent. It seems the Antwerp route is less signposted… Maybe because it's less travelled? Some lovely gardeners helped me find the LF5, and were impressed at my mileage. I shrugged in a way that suggested I do horrible things to myself everyday. There was also a severe lack of amenities on route. I found only one place for coffee, a legit wee and a flask refill. I also had to do some random (badly signposted… If at all!) ferry crossings, which I worked out by my route abruptly ending, and by pointing and saying 'Antwerp??' So ignorant. I've now been navigating solely by an app I downloaded called Bike Hub. It's great because it works offline, and all I really need to know is that I'm following the correct numbers. Beautiful numbers. So I made it to Antwerp. Found the closest hostel and made nest. It feels a little more fashionable and commercial here… It has the strongest branding of any of the places I've visited so far, slightly similar to the A typography of Amsterdam. I approve. The streets at night are both disconcertingly and refreshingly muted in lighting. I'm enjoying fucking off from places as soon as I'm done with them, with no ceremony besides a quick disposal of maps I no longer need and a few obligatory weird looks. I also enjoy walking about like I own the place, too stubborn to use a map but seeing stuff anyway. It's swell to not have to bend to anyone's needs but my own, and it sure is lucky I'm interested in enough things to occupy myself. My main expenditures are coffee, beer and accommodation. I know my priorities.

I'm enjoying fu places as so with them, wit besides a qu maps and a

ucking off from oon as I'm done th no ceremony uick disposal of a few obligatory weird looks

Holland

Friday, 17 April 2015 Netherlands: Wind and Water Buses Two weeks into the trip and I'm in the Netherlands! I could have done it quicker, but fuck that. The only way I knew I had crossed a border was a slight change in signage and by getting a text through from Vodafone. I was quite happy to leave Antwerp… We had our differences. It was totally yuppie city (probably all the diamonds) and it was just a bit too fashionable for me. It was a good place to rest up and wash my clothes though. For my last night there I went and watched a live jazz band, feeling appropriately out of place looking like someone out of a hair metal band, drinking beer out of a wine glass. It was interesting regardless So I aborted Antwerp with out a second glance and followed the LF2 to the Netherlands. And what a ride it was! Lovely nature reserves all the way, lovely weather (even got a cheeky bit of sun burn). Was very happy to be in my tent, amongst trees, eating salad wraps like an asshole (I'm doing my best to avoid curious European meats). I've encountered quite a few people surprised at what I'm doing these last few days… Maybe it's smaller towns. One bloke stopped me, asked where I was going, genuinely LOLed when I said I was going alone and then sent me in the wrong direction. Arse. I've also become quite hostile towards people looking at me strange… It gets pretty boring. Another woman in a cafe expressed concern for my mother… A better concern! I guess it's because I look so young and foolish. If only they could see my cynical mind. Now I'm on a water bus to Rotterdam. There was quite a few ferry crossings (the cycle route led straight to the docks), so I figured I may just go the whole way. Yesterday cycling into the wind got very boring. Today I encountered a blocked route with no instructions for diversions. Cue breakdown. Luckily there was a top bloke about to help carry my bike across a plank of wood over some water (I wielded my stubborn ways and let this go as an act of kindness).

Saturday, 18 April 2015 Netherlands: Resting in Rotterdam Spent the whole weekend in Rotterdam, because why the hell not. I had a good feeling about Rotterdam, and I was right! And boy, do I love being right. Arrived Friday and did a crap pub crawl but with nice people. Met another graphic designer so it was good to whinge at length about design again. The hostel I'm at is super nice; it's called Ani & Haakien and it's so chilled out and lovely it's quite easy to stay here all day. I sat in a hammock and cleaned my bike. Party! Today I had a proper look around. This place reminds me of Bristol which is quite nice! I enjoy the big ugly industrial port side, the modern buildings don't necessarily sit well together but they're trying their best, and the best bit is that there's public art everywhere! It's amazing how much difference this makes; you don't feel like you have to spend bucks to have a good time. It's also the most culturally diverse place I've been to yet, which is refreshing. I'm staying tonight then tomorrow cycling to The Hague, then my end destination for the night a place called Leiden. Then to Amsterdam! Taking it nice and easy and enjoying walking around with no pressure. It's funny how quickly you get itchy feet though. I've not cycled properly for three days and I feel well out of it! Adapting is quick though.

Tuesday, 21 April 2015 Netherlands: Amsterdam via Leiden Left Rotterdam before 8am on a beautiful sunny Monday morning after a chilled weekend and with second breakfast in my bag. I had a nice ride following the LF11 to a place called The Hague (Den Haag), since it was on my way and I had heard good things about it. It's also interesting since it's where the government is based! But it was too busy and touristy for me; it's funny how big and cumbersome my bike feels out of context! Luckily it doesn't take too long to get away and soon enough I was in peace following the LF1 again to Leiden (about halfway between Rotterdam and Amsterdam). The LF1 was interesting, among sand dunes and no cars or scooters what so ever. There was even a water fountain! Every route should have water. I guess it's a very mainstream route. Lots of very serious lycra-clad folk. Contrasted to me plodding along, swearing into the wind. Leiden was a nice place too, I wish I had allowed longer to explore. Quite studenty but filled with lots of little canals and shops with things painted on the wall. I stayed the night and headed to Amsterdam today. I wasn't sure if I'd go all the way cos I was a little intimidated, to be honest! But it was a super easy ride, I felt like I just rode in a straight line following some red signs all the way. Probably not the most scenic but I couldn't be fucked to arse around today. I plugged my headphones in and sang loudly to Neutral Milk Hotel to pass the time. A woman stopped me and asked what I was doing earlier, said how lovely it was to see me all loaded up, and then maternally told me to take care. How lovely! Some days I appreciate curiosity more than others. Don't plan on cycling in main Amsterdam â&#x20AC;&#x201D; disgustingly busy! Chilling out and doing some pesky personal hygiene stuff that no one talks about because it's boring. But having clean hair and clothes makes me feel sassy, so what.

A woman said how lovely it was to see me loaded up, then maternally told me to take care 29

Saturday, 25 April 2015 Netherlands: Utrecht The only set plan I had this week was to be in Utrecht by today since I'm going to see a band called Screaming Females play. It's exciting to see a band in a different place! I was gutted that I'd miss them in Bristol. Anyway, this means I feel as though I've dragged out my week in Holland. In a good way thoughâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; I've really enjoyed cycling around the place! On Thursday I left Amsterdam and found a camp between there and Utrecht. It was unnecessary since I could have easily made it in a day, they're so close, but I relished a proper quiet, dark lovely night of camping. No socialising, just sleeping when it's dark and waking when it's light! I left early (it's still a touch too cold for comfortable camping), and got to Utrecht by 10am. I literally rode about 20km that day. But it's nice and easy going. I followed the LF7a and it was simple enough (if we ignore the fact I went in circles the day previously due to a poorly angled signâ&#x20AC;Ś Whoops!). I've learnt that the green 'L' routes meander and take you a bit of a longer way to where you're going, since they're meant to to make it more enjoyable etc. Whereas the red routes will just take you directly there with no piss-assing around. I choose green every time!

Utrecht is nice. I feel like a pretty crap tourist everywhere I go though. I quite enjoy just wandering or cycling about the place as opposed to going nuts and hitting every hot spot. I guess I feel I sight see enough on the bike. Seeing new places is enough, I don't need to know the entire history! Though Utrecht is proper old and has big fat trees everywhere, which I enjoy too much. It's easy to cycle around like Amsterdam and quick to navigate (of course, I still manage to get lost). Looking forward to hitting the road and doing more scenic routes in the south east of Holland, which are meant to be pretty. Then I guess I shuffle over to Germany! Which I'm apprehensive about, but I'm sure will be fine. Because Germany's so big, I plan on staying south west and catching a train to Copenhagen at the end of May to meet some pals. Then who knows! A German man also touring asked me what I was doing, why I wasn't in the south of France where it's warm, and when I told him I wasn't sure where I was going said 'That is real travelling!' And it was a lovely start to the day!

Tuesday, 28 April 2015 Netherlands: Back to the Trees After feeling like I had pottered around cities for too long, I longed to get back on the road and get some KM under me. So that's what I did! I met a lovely lady named Gitta who also cycle toured and knew the area, so got some advice about where to go next and managed not to get lost! Not that it would have mattered if I did get lost since I'm not actually really going anywhere… Besides nice places! So I went through some smaller towns including Wijk Bij Duurstede (don't ask me to say it), and was generally following a body of water called the Leke. Nice and easy! There's so much camping in Holland that I can safely start looking for a spot around about 3pm and find one in the hour. It's good practice to find somewhere before 5pm since if there's reception that's when they close. If not, you could probably pitch up and sort it in the morning. I then set off following the river once more through Arnhem, which was a busy town, made all the busier by Kings Day celebrations! I swiftly made an exit, then ended up in some lovely national parks in the direction of Apeldoorn.

Today after camping in a national park (very expensive camping!), I woke up with frost on my tent! Quite surprised. So I ate my croissants in my sleeping bag, packed up ASAP and then stood by the radiator in the toilet block to warm up. I don't give the smallest shit about weird looks anymore. I'm not in a lovely motorhome! It's funny how you quickly start seeing everything really practically. A radiator? I'll dry my towel! A small ledge? Lunch spot! I took to the nearest town to find coffee and warm my toes. I've discovered I can have my tent down and breakfast eaten in 45 minutes, but I leave a good hour and 30 to be on the road after warming up and doing bag weight distribution! I'll do this for a few more days and then see how long it'll take me to get to Germany I guess.

It’s so easy to navigate here, at every number there’s generally a sign post telling you where you are and which number to follow next. And you can just change your mind, and know there will be another sign at any moment! It’s glorious.You also get used to what the cycle paths you’re following look like, so if you nip off you can find them again. 33

Thursday, 30 April 2015 Netherlands: Zwolle in Circles I'm so rubbish at this some days! Other days everything marvellously falls into place. I guess that's applicable to everything. After my frosty night I headed to a convenient hostel in Apeldoorn. I had a great ride through more national parks; it's so fun to fly through woods on nice smooth paths! Practically no one around too. Brilliant. Then I headed back North to Zwolle. I laughed derisively at the sign saying 40km, knowing that'd be easy. But fear not, I manage to make it difficult! I planned my route by looking at maps and heading towards the green, foresty bits even though it was longer, so that bit was swell. I popped into Zwolle, went past a campsite thinking 'too easy!' And then proceeded to the only part of Holland without a campsite in a 10km radius. Back I went! Managing to make this into 70km day doing loops. Another reason to go back was going into the wind made me genuinely most upset (great thing about being alone #35: bending to emotions without shame). So I camped, and then it rained, testing both my equipment and my patience. Worst sleep ever! Loud rain combined with extreme paranoia my tent would leak and ALL my important things would be eternally wet (it didn't). At one point I considered the viability of moving my stuff and sleeping in the shower room (the answer: very viable). I stuck it out though and everything was fine.

In the morning a missionary offered me coffee and by the time I remembered what a missionary was I had already gratefully said YES to compensate my wet hands. I smiled politely at talk of god and homeopathy. Then I had to go back on myself again for today, into the wind again, to a place called Gorssel or thereabouts. I made today's priority finding an indoor place to sleep since I heard there'd be thunder but it looks a pleasant evening! I've got the hostel room to myself so I'm stinking up the place without shame and doing what I spend most of my time doing which is looking after my basic human needs. Good to be out of citiesâ&#x20AC;Ś I've lost a bit of interest in making friends since other travelers often flinch at the idea of camping, or they ask me inane questions like 'why cycling?' (Whilst I hide an eye-roll and inanely reply back 'because I like it'). I might totally and utterly turn into Gollum by next week but we'll see how it goes.

Great thing about being alone #35: bending to my emotions without shame 35

Friday, 1 May 2015 Netherlands: Creeping up on Germany I had a bloody lovely night in the hostel with the hut all to myself. I even washed all my clothes, so feeling sassy (even if I had to walk around in pyjama shorts as consequence) The ride to Enschede was easy; the guy at the hostel frightened me when he remarked that it was far but it was only about 50KM. I took quite direct routes because I feared otherwise the mileage would add up. Got there easy and found camp easy, leaving plenty of time for not finding anywhere less depressing than a McDonalds to sit before a cold night camping. Who the fuck sits here by choice? McDonalds are my beacons of WiFi when in distress The route into Germany looks easy enough after a quick lookâ&#x20AC;Ś I'm worried camping with be more sporadic and less reliable. I'm worried I'll get confused by the efficient German signs. Due to these worries I've not set myself a large goal for Germany tomorrow. I'll just edge in, keeping eyes pealed for camp, set up, and sigh with relief. I'm looking forward to the change of scenery though. Trying to forget it's the weekend. This is my first weekend I've not set a stop in a larger city with intention of socialising etc. This has been my week of proper cycle touring! I'll try and bear that in mind as I try not to think of beer as I go to sleep at 10pm.

Germany

Monday, 4 May 2015 Germany: An Underestimation The last few days I have learnt that Germany is actually rather big, and that I can brush my teeth lying down in a one man tent. Cycling to Germany itself from the Netherlands was dead easy; I had crossed the border by 11am. I stuck to the main roads cos I didn't wanna get lost, so it wasn't the most scenic, but I was so worried I was like "fuck scenery". I went through Ochtrup, then did a little loop following a camp sign to The Worst Campsite in The World, then headed north to a small place called Bad Benthiem which was Less Awful. Good move— was a nice place, quiet campsite, the town had a castle and I had a pizza which I destroyed in 5 minutes. Next day I headed towards Rheine. Quite manageable with the rather basic but use able signage. Often just an arrow with a bike pointing forward like YOU WORK IT OUT (difficult after the mollycoddling of Holland). But I'm getting there. Camped again, but it rained and I was done with camping, being alone and feeling stressed. Done! It's tough to be in a bad mood with no immediate prospects of improvement… You literally just have to make yourself feel better! I planned the next day to Munster, my first big town, and did some air drumming. It helped.

Surviving by itself is getting tiresome, on both physical and emotional levels. It’s tough to have to constantly put practicality before what I actually want. Tired, but have to press on. Raining, but have to sleep in a tent. Lonely, but no one speaks fucking English or wants to talk to a young, smelly girl anyway. I’m worried that if I become anymore practical I’ll turn into some cycle-borg. Also I've realised traveling this way puts you in a minority where ever you go. Campsites are down to earth, but usually full of older people who are confused that I look too young to be there alone, but old enough to be there without my mum. Hostels are full of city folk who are disappointed I'm not into hip things. Being female and on my own further exacerbates this minority, which is a shame, but means I have to try harder. After feeling so fed up, the next morning I had my tent down and packed at 7am (also because I feared

it would rain). I initially did some wavering woodland routes following signs for towns in the direction of Munster, then I got fed up of going so slow and being off road, so used some common sense to get on the main road instead (not quite an autobahn, there's a steady cycle path along the whole thingâ&#x20AC;Ś. Not the most pleasant but it bloody does the job). Got here by about 1pm. Got my first German Weiss beer at 6. I've noticed a definite increase in car presence. I stopped at a bakery early on Sunday morning and everyone was driving to get their morning bread, which I found strange! It's more normal to care about head protection and wear helmets (probably the car presence), and I feel like I fit in with my Ortlieb panniers (i.e. The Best Panniers Ever â&#x20AC;&#x201D; as said by everyone). I do miss Holland a bit, everything was so easy! Even picking up WiFi, etc. I hate how much I rely on the internet but it's an invaluable tool, and means eventually carrying less stuff (or carrying moisturiser and dental floss instead, I am such a diva). Gonna do some hard core planning to get over Germany. I think this will be the way to stop the miniature daily breakdowns.

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m worried that if I become anymore practical Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll turn into some cycle-borg

Wednesday, 6 May 2015 Germany: Munster (still) I feel like I've spent my entire time here flapping about trying to sort out what to do next. Which was lucky really, since I learnt that there are no direct trains to Copenhagen for bikesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; a thing I had taken for granted considering what a prolific cycle continent this is! It's a definite flawâ&#x20AC;Ś So my plan changed radically in a day. I was gonna potter around a while before heading north but now I'm getting the next train to Hamburg and then pedaling up from there. I am worried about the train not actually going though, since there are strikes (literally, never depend on public transport). I'd cycle it, but the prospect of cutting days off my journey (and stress) is too enticing! I've done some research and there are ferry's from a place called Rostock in Germany, so I guess that's where I'll be heading! Mildly worried about the weather but I guess it'll just be a case of pressing on. But it's been good to not fucking cycle. My feet are unused to walking. Like I said, not seen a great deal of Munster besides the insides of coffee shops and my own frantic notes, trying to sort my life out. But it certainly is a pretty place by sunset. Apparently this place is 'cycle city of Germany!' Which makes me apprehensive about the rest of itâ&#x20AC;Ś You ain't got shit on Holland (I'm afraid no where will, I've never felt so safe on a bike). I shared a dorm room with people taking soil samples and drying it on windowsills, which was brilliant cos me and my one man could also dry and recoperate soundly. I'm now sitting in a Starbucks for unashamed piss taking, at the cost of my soul. Just witnessed someone photograph their coffee and I'm dying. I'm gonna open a coffee shop that doesn't have photos of fucking coffee on the walls.

Saturday, 9 May 2015 Germany: A Sharp(ish) Exit I am so utterly done with Germany. I'm sure it's a mixture of my fluctuating emotions and my occasional utter lack of sense, but I've not had the best of time in these parts! Poor, bumpy cycle paths, often tailing into nothingness, signage for cycle routes clumsy (some fallen off and stickers faded and useless)… I could go on. I survived the train journey to Hamburg with only two incidents of stupidity which were rectified by human kindness, then had the worst time cycling peak traffic through roadworks and apocalyptic rain in the city centre. I found the hostel, found shower, found chocolate, then bed. I quite enjoy striping enjoyment back to basic (if still luxurious things). I also have never quite understood comfort eating as I have on this trip. Next morning I still hadn't decided what to do, deciding to go according to feeling. I decided to fuck Hamburg right off and start making progress towards Denmark to feel productive after all the rest. I got my first muscley leg comment, but I really think it was the bruises, grazes and general unkempt ness that gave me away as a cyclist (perhaps also the smell). I swore the whole way out of Hamburg city centre, but it got easier once I was out. Camped in a lovely quiet place called Lankau where I also got my first German surname comment ("your surname is German and yet you speak English??"). I listened to birds and thought how nice it was not to be in the UK on election night.

My next increment was to Wismar, another 60km or so. This ride was pretty easy, if sometimes boring (as much as I resent admitting it)… The rapeseed flowers in the sunlight were pretty glorious, it was nice to see some yellow. But then all I fucking saw was yellow. The route became a tad more undulating at this point. Again, fun at first! Stayed in a youth hostel where I was certain I alone had more body hair than all these teenage boys altogether. Pretty proud. The weather's been dead fucking warm, which has been quite flustering. Especially when it's rainy.You have to decide what's more important: comfort now (wet, but cool), or comfort later (dry but hot). Clothes will always dry, so give me immediate comfort! Today I felt like a ball of rage hurtling (comparative hurtling) down coastal hills. Rain, wind, signs… I just felt impatient. Wasted 20km just trying to find the fucking path to Rostock, then when I got on it it was displayed as '60'km but was definitely 70+! Then no hostels were free cos I'm totally inept and didn't think entirely ahead, so actually managed to make today 100.

Denmark

Sunday, 10 May 2015 Denmark: Sans Mishaps I'm surprised too. I'm out of Germany! Getting to the port this morning was easy enough, signposted and all so I didn't have to go through horrible roads. Some guy even guessed I wanted the port and pointed me in the right direction. I've realised that my stubborn personality trait means I only actually ask for help in the final moment, or when I've already fucked up. This means that help I don't have to ask for is greatly welcomed, and keeps my pride in tact. I bloody hate ferry's though. They're justâ&#x20AC;Ś. Weird. Getting off the ferry on the other side was beautiful and smooth. A few metres and there was a sign pointing me to my next planned stop, Nykobing Falster, only about 30km away. But my god, the slowest thirty! Wall of wind, just to highlight how small and insignificant I am on my bike. At least it wasn't raining too, which was what I kept telling myself! Had a small panic in Germany this morning after depleting my food stores after yesterday's 100km and finding no supermarkets (even Lidl!) open on a Sunday. All I had in my bag was peanut butter and peanuts, so I definitely wouldn't have died, but Denmark was a beacon of Open Places. Cold soup has been a constant emergency sustenance meal. I don't understand the currency, and now I need to re-learn all the necessary signs I need by guessing and clocking repeated ones. I only just got the hang of German ones! I guess I just need 'bike', 'center', and 'all through traffic' to really get anywhere. Tomorrow I'll head north and see how it goes and how long I wanna potter around. If I'm not enjoying it I'll head towards the city early and re consider. My pals get here in over a week so I've plenty of time!

Tuesday, 12 May 2015 Denmark: Remembering I'm on Holiday Holiday mode! I'm not sure if it's being so happily out if Germany and feeling nice and safe on a smaller island with edges and seabirds, or if it's realising I did 1000km from Utrecht to here in two weeks (and over 1000 miles in total!), but I have been treating myself. From departing the hostel I hadn't planned much, but pootled along the coastal path in the direction of north, and it was great. Nipped into the woods a bit, off roady paths… Seabirds! I forgot Germany was so landlocked. And there were glorious maps on route too… With a key of helpful information that I could have kissed. I followed a route and tried a new technique of camping early and then actually working out what to do next. I think that's the beauty of smaller places… More time to reflect, suss a place out, find internet if you need it. Not have to spend my life in McDonald's panicking! So that was exactly what I did. I stopped at a place just over a bridge called Vordingborg. It was nice enough! Camp was easy, and it was a swell day so I bought some cans of beer and drank on some castle ruins with my hood up, reveling in being anti social. Great. I had enough energy left to cruise through some forest too. I felt as happy as a twelve year old boy. In the evening I oiled my chain cos I heard it complaining, which was made all the pleasant from the presence of beer. I do take care of the bike, as well as myself!

I also found some baked beans, which made me the happiest woman in Netto. The camp had a microwave, so I had warm beans for breakfast. Brilliant! I left camp so chuffed I didn't even feel the need for a coffee stop. I headed for Neastved and got there before 11, and settled with some cake because, I'M ON HOLIDAY and I can. Then it pissed down. I started riding towards camp for a bit, then thought, fuck this, and turned back where I knew there was a hostel. I'm all up for being hardcore and cheap sometimes, but I was quickly soaked through and didn't want totally wet sleep… I'm on holiday! I moaned. Which is how I justify this very expensive room I'm in. It's a hostel but a pricey one. Don't worry though— I utterly took the piss and washed my clothes in the sink using hand wash, then dried them on the radiator, whilst drinking my own tea. Worked a treat! Clothes washing takes so long and is such a hindrance. I very nearly just bought new ones. So tomorrow I'll… Cycle! Eat! Sleep! Repeat.

Cycle! Eat! Sleep! Repeat. 51

Thursday, 14 May 2015 Denmark: Nature Girl A lovely few days I've had! I've enjoyed dialing it back and going a bit slower, taking less direct routes because camps are so close, and because I can. Feeling tired today! Yesterday I followed the river Susa from Naestved, through woods and countryside. I'm constantly glad I've got mountain bike tyres that give me the option to take these more interesting paths! It was glorious. Nice to be by water. It then opened up to a few bigger rivers as I got closer to my stop for the night, Soro. The weather was flippant and mental, keeping me on my toes with rain, wind and sun. But I enjoyed it regardless. Seen a deer, and a load of startled rabbitsâ&#x20AC;Ś Chuffed Today I packed up on early but pootled around town trying to find coffee at 9amâ&#x20AC;Ś Impossible! Why can't everyone rise as early as me. I followed the rivers in the direction of a place called Ringstead, again taking a meandering route, and am camping north of there. So close to Copenhagen but taking my time! Tomorrow I head to a city very close called Roskilde, which should be interesting. Today was puncture #2 of the trip. Not surprising, with all the bumps, weight I'm carrying, and glass I've ran over! 'At least it's not raining' is the thought making me feel much better.

Sunday, 17 May 2015 Denmark: Cycling and Stuff More good days, less whinging. Since last entry I found that I was accidentally following another tourer around, since we met at two camp sites.Very weird, especially since I've been doing comparatively short days and also haven't met many tourers so far, unless I've worked hard at it! He was heading to Norway, so we rode from camp in Soro to Roskilde, which was the stop for the night. A beautiful Friday it was! The route we followed was a national cycle route, and went through more forests and past swimming lakes. We stopped, dipped feet, affirmed it was indeed a million times too cold for swimming. It was quite strange to cycle with someone, especially since I don't have any comparative sense of distance. He was also fresh to touring, which was quite reassuring! Though he had one up on me since he had a map… Got to Roskilde early. I thought it would be busier since it's the second biggest city but it was fairly disappointing! We camped by the fjord though, which was sure pretty. Since it was such a nice evening I bought beers and drank them on the swing overlooking the water (Denmark apparently being my boozey time, I think its because of my shorter days!) On Saturday we went our separate ways, and I spent an hour trying to find my route out of Roskilde to my end destination, Lyngby. A very frustrating day since I wasn't following main routes! At points I nearly gave up and just went to Copenhagen which would have been easier! I pressed on and made it, hurrah! Then I met someone called Hilary who's lovely, and went to Copenhagen for an odd night of loud bars and an overestimated amount of pizza and chips on my behalf… ('I cycled today!' — the eternal excuse). Ready for bed at 10pm and not giving a shit about being boring or wearing my bum bag in bars (all the B's, basically). Today I'm mostly eating and enjoying not cycling. Holiday.

Wednesday, 27 May 2015 Denmark: Copenhagen (Mostly Catch Up) Before I headed for Copenhagen, I did a quick ride North to a place called Helsingor, which followed a main cycle route along the coast, so was dead easy and enjoyable. Got there in a day and set up camp about 10km away, and was all happy and content, until it rained all night. Cue constant time checking and waiting for morning. I packed up in a flash at the most acceptable time and went straight back down to Copenhagen using the same route as the day before, even though I usually like to avoid doing that. I figured the longer route I wanted to take would probably be more scenic but would be even slower due to being off-road and all rain-sodden. So down I flew, checking in to the hostel and gratefully warming my toes in the shower. My friends weren't arriving for another day or two, so I took it slow and chilled out (standard). People at the hostel are all like 'you're only drinking two beers and you don't want to socialise with EVERYONE? Weird.' Some guy thought I was a local based on my nosering? Odd. The next day I met a guy called Morten who was kind enough to show me around the city, with our bikes. It was a real nice way to see it, and get my bearings and pretend to know everything before my friends arrived. Plus, proper conversation is always appreciatedâ&#x20AC;Ś Small talk is very exasperating after a while. And then my friends came! Hurrah for people who know me! One of my friends, Emily, came to Copengahen to run a marathon. The other came to enjoy the city. And enjoy the city we did. The whole place has a very relaxed atmosphere, and it was also nice to do some galleries and museums since I've not actually done too many on this trip. The sun came out, and after the marathon we drank beers on Emily's behalf by the water and ate til I felt sick (standard). It was great! Proper holiday week.

Now I am by myself again, but secretely quite enjoying just having to think about my own (eternally hungry) stomach. I left Copenhagen yesterday, cycled about 30km south, realised I could just get a train to near the port town and cut out some crap nights camping, and blundered about at various train stations in Denmark. Literally not a clue what I was doing at losts of changeovers. But I made it back to Nykobing Falster, set up camp, and interneted my next day's plans. It was very strange to be back after feeling as though I was there so long ago! This morning I cycled around 24km to Gedser, the ferry port, in great time due to the wind behind me being an absolute babe. I then cycled to Rostock with a couple who were also cycle touring (with a dog!), Jen and Dave, which was nice because I'm always happy to both hear English and chat about touring! They had come from Norway and were headed south. Tomorrow I'll get a train to Dresden.Yikes. I'm worried since there are two changeovers and I'm terrible at public transport. It will be fine! I'm looking forward to the change of scenery south and seeing a different place after being still so long. Still unsure of how long I can go, but I'll carry on till I get more of an idea.

Friday, 29 May 2015 Germany: Trains to Dresden Back in Germany! Trying to remember things like the cheapest German supermarket, and which one I can buy glorious microwave rice from. Yesterday I caught all the trains from Rostock. It was a little complicated due to trains that allow bikes, and I was dead worried (have I mentioned I hate public transport?), but all went swimmingly. On the last train from Leipzig to Dresden there was 10 minutes to get from platform 8 to 22. Panic! But it was easy, the trains are made with bikes in mind so it's no problem. Noticed a few more tourers around this part, or maybe it's the season change. Passed through Berlin on my way in, but was too scared to cycle there as part of this trip, already having a hard time with German cities. The day of trains cut 400 odd kilometres off my journey! More to use elsewhere. Scanning the landscape on the way down I didn't feel bad for missing it. Dresden is nice enough, it's also nice to be back looking at whatever takes my fancy. I'm staying in the youngest, hippest place (Neustadt), but I'm not feeling too well to really embrace it today (I'm mensurating, IT'S NATIONAL MENSURATION DAY, hear me roar and curse my damned womb, and be lucky enough to do so where I please). The old city itself is rather strange since we bombed the shit out of it once, so it seemed curiously spacious and pedestrianised. The roads are still fucking awful, stop rebuilding ridiculously elaborate things and focus on some infrastructure!

I met some architects who were discussing how they saw cities differently, but I didn't get the chance to explain how being on a bike makes me see cities differently, too. Previously I would have protested at being defined by my mode of transport, but now I realise it's reflective of the ways I want to live in general: slowly, simply, without hurting anyone, self - sufficientlyâ&#x20AC;Ś. I go into cities and look for places and things which show people actually live there, that's the most interesting part. And cities which have most spaces for people, and a fluid system just feel nice. It's brilliant when things function, and you can see it in the matter of a day. I watch and probably make assumptions that are totally wrong. But it's fun. Other tourists can't supply me with that information! Last week I cringed outwardly at an american guy reciting some clichĂŠ 'find yourself' travel film saying 'You've gotta get out from behind the map'. It's not myself I am interested in, but it helps. Tomorrow I'm gonna try and follow the river Elbe route on my way to Prague. I hope it's as competent as it looks! I want an easy ride I don't have to plan too much, please.

Czech Republic

Saturday, 30 May 2015 Czech Republic: River Elbe Route Today was great, even more so after such a long time off proper cycling! I had intended on making today a short one but once I got going I felt like I could go for ages. The Elbe route was easy to find from Dresden city, just follow the river, innit. I found it funny that it was so signposted, when really it's quite simple! I also had a chuckle at people with maps, but maybe they were going further. The road was fantastically smooth, and 10 minutes out of Dresden and I was looking at great trees and interesting rocky cliffs. The fact it was so easy made me want to go further too. I ended up doing about 80 km to the first camp in the Czech Republic. Easy! This campsite is playing lots of music at once and it's driving me a bit nuts. City camps. My last night in Dresden was enjoyable. I found a beer shop, and freely walked around with it since I had noticed street drinking was super common. I did it for the novelty. Later there was music in the street and a nice relaxed atmosphere of people with their own drinks, sitting on curbs. Tomorrow I take to the road once more, on the same route. I'm quite annoyed I need new currency again! I think I'm about 160 km from Prague, which could be two days but I'll play it by ear.

Sunday, 31 May 2015 Czech Republic: Elbe Again For some reason I was wary about the Czech Republic, but if the rest of the country's routes are as good as this we're gonna get on fine! Today was another smooth one, after a minor bit of losing the Elbe in the morning after complicating things myself. I think I fell asleep to Bob Marely at the camp site last night. Almost relaxing! Definite increase in cycle tourers, but I guess it's nearly bloody June so they're all creeping out! It's nice to hear where people are headed, and not feel like the only one in the world, as it does sometimes. Though few are on as long and as vague a journey. I can't believe it's been two months! So I followed the lovely Elbe south from Decin, and did another roughly 80km to my next place, Roudnice Nad Labem. There are so many camps and things along route, which is great, cos it means I can choose to press on or stop early. Benefits of large tourism, I guess. I chose to press on, which I slightly regretted when the camp I was promised was badly signposted and a teeny bit too far! I think the sun had got to me, and I should have reapplied sun cream and drank more water. Lesson learnt: it's warmer south! So my T-shirt tan is coming along fantastically, you'll be glad to know. The route itself is mostly flat since it's obviously following the river, so you spend most of the time surrounded by hills of trees, which you can also see in the distance. The route from Germany was mostly signposted by the wonderful E logo, but once in Czech it changes to a yellow number 2 sign. Pretty easy and consistent to follow on both accounts. All I take photos of is my bike and signage I admire. I'm roughly 80km from Prague now, where I'll drop off route to get to the city. Which means I'll be there for my birthday! Looking forward to it, since I feel the Czech quickly becoming one of my favourites. Looks like there are good connections to Austria tooâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; yay for mountains!

Wednesday, 3 June 2015 Czech Republic: Birthday in Prague For my 23rd birthday, I got from Dresden to Prague in three days and spent my actual birthday putting my saddle sore through the cobbled stones of the historic city. I had a few frustrations on my ride in, where the route dropped off the number 2 following the Elbe/Labe, and changed to number 7 following the main river that flows through Prague city centre. Easy, I thought! Famous last words. Sun was blazing, and at a point in which I couldn't find a sign I was in a town which smelt overwhelmingly of piss. With kids laughing at me going in circles. Turned out I had to go ACROSS THE WATER obviously, on a little boat controlled by an extremely casual man. Then about 20 km from Prague it got a little hilly, so I had to remember to take it slow so I didn't genuinely die (people die of sun, I read about it in the news, it's fact!) But I seen some cool old stones and woods on the way in, which balanced it. It was a very pretty ride! Though an entire day in the sun is a little risky. Got to the city and found hostel and didn’t leave. Wowed more travelers with my casual tale of cycling Europe. The funny thing is I don’t think I’ve really been that far, or pushed myself particularly hard. I’m just traveling, and it just so happens to be with my best pal, my bike! Why wouldn’t I go with my bike? I would definitely get bored of city hopping. It’s nice to hear of other people’s travels, even if they often sound the same and sometimes follow similar logical routes. Logic for a reason! I quiz everyone on what cycling is like where they’re from.

I wasn't too fussed about my actual birthday, what is the age of 23?! All I need to know is I'm young enough to do this trip quite happily. I cycled around town as best I could (Prague is such an old city that it's really not made for bikes, it will take a lot of work to get up to standard!) I often just walked with my bike. I stuck to pavements most of the time, because if the system doesn't work I'll make my own, what you gonna do, Prague? I struggled with the touristy aspect of Prague; it was quite overwhelming and I can't stand crowds, and it makes me hate everything.Yeah, it's pretty, but it lacks any sense of being properly lived in. At least the parts I seen. Navigating was difficult and it's surprisingly big. In the evening I went back to the famous Charles Bridge and watched people take photos of themselves in the sunset. I didn't tell anyone it was my birthday because I couldn't stand sympathetic looks about how lonely and sad I must be. Today I'm gonna relax again. Camp nearby, work out how to get to Austria and also how many hills there areâ&#x20AC;Ś

Friday, 5 June 2015 Czech Republic: Pooped Quick post due to lack of phone battery! Plus the fact I'm relying on it to check the route. I left Prague last night after a pretty chilled few days. I was super worried about getting out of the city centre but it was easy enough! Easy to find the number 11, which is the official Prague- Vienna route, so once I had got that I was fine! Camp was provided on a map, easy! I washed my legs in the lake to celebrate. Stopped for coffee and some guy told me it was dangerous to travel alone. I gave him my best sass asked him 'what am I supposed to do, sit at home all day?'. I've barely had any trouble so far. My main trouble today has been heat and hills. Doing everything I can to heat proof. The route's been easy though and I've been encouraged by seeing other cyclists on it, too! Today I made it to Tabor, which is good progress, considering I nearly gave up early. Taking it as slow as I need to with lots of stops and flask refills in cemeteries (pro tip learned from my dad: cemeteries always have water taps to water flowers). Landscape is nice, I feel like such a small splot on such a large plane. Sometimes the world feels small but today it felt very big. I'm very tired, I hate thinking about the next day's food all the time, I need a shower, I hope my knees don't hurt tomorrow.

Saturday, 6 June 2015 Czech Republic: Route to Vienna Today will be my forth day following this route from leaving Prague. I've got a few more to go yet! My bum is protesting after a few long 50 miles / 80 km days, but we'll see if I have to start taking it slower! So I followed the 11, now I'm on the 32. The route's managed by the Greenway's, and has a cute little symbol which I am thankful for (love symbols, so much). Met a big group of older men doing the route, all wearing matching jersey's with the route on, occasionally over taking, and vice versa! Very nice to remember I'm not the only one. And very thankful I'm not in a group, even having them in front or behind was enough for me to push myself when I didn't particularly want to! I much prefer just getting there when I get there. Eating where I want, etc. Tabor itself was a really nice place. The whole of the Czech is in such fantastic old condition! It's lovely, and in these smaller cities it's easier to appreciate than Prague, so I'm glad to do the trip in this way, again. Not interesting enough to visit for a long time but interesting enough! I also seen a roadside deer. Chuffed. Few more inclines on route, but I guess that's to be expected. Will have to do some bag arranging if it gets tough. I need new shoes, mine are falling apart, but I'm loathe to do anything about it.Yesterday I treated myself to a date at an Indian restaurant and it was fantastic. The less you do it, the better it is when you do! I'm real close to the Austrian border now, and the route just follows it along a bit, which I've heard is pretty. Strap in.

Sometimes the world feels small but today it felt very big 66

Sunday, 7 June 2015 Czech Republic: Slavonice (ish) My fourth day on route, and today was thankfully a little slower. In the morning I visited the town Jindrihuv Hradec (a nice little place!) And got excited when I saw a paper map of the route and bought it right away. It's comforting to have… As you may have guessed I quite enjoy the feeling of (believed) self-sufficiency! Terrain felt as though it evened out a little for this stretch. Mostly on quiet country roads but the cars that do go past are going quite fast. Helmet on. Felt as though I whizzed through forests, getting glimpses of high places ("is that Austria yet??") Route's still splendidly signposted. Today it changes to the 48. I hate that the numbers don't make obvious sense. I've met a lot of people saying "traveling by bike? On your own??" More and more for this part! I've got my speech rehearsed now. Is it just the Czech Republic, I wonder? Maybe just the bit I'm in. There are Jesus on the crucifix statues every couple of km, through every little weird town that contains one house with no windows. Who's idea was that?! It's quite disconcerting to cram a nut bar into my face with Jesus obviously in a lot of pain next to me…. Today I also seen one live deer and one dead deer. Pros and cons. Tomorrow's plan: cycle til I want to die, repeat. I'm looking forward to a bed after all this camping! The Czech R is WiFi heaven by the way… I'm pretty sure internet is now recognised as a basic human need along with needing to wee (actually, it's probably more easy to find internet) My diet has turned into nuts, seeds and bread added to everything, give me nutrition immediately.

Tuesday, 9 June 2015 Czech Republic: Border of Austria My phone has officially text me to say I'm in Austria, and I haven't the heart to correct it. I've been going east along the border for a few days now and it's been lovelyâ&#x20AC;Ś So much wildlife and also history! There are a few cycle routes crossing my own, so there's loads of choice, though I'm choosing to stick to the one to Vienna. There's the Iron Curtain trail, marking the same border that follows to Berlin's wall, and even a Movarian wine trail (which doesn't interest me at all). I've seen more deer! A couple of dead moles (I don't think I've seen a living moleâ&#x20AC;Ś.), and some bright green lizards in a national park (to which my reaction was 'fucking hell!', as I swerved to avoid them) Great. More heat and more hills. I can't remember the last time I sweat so much! Yesterday was a hoot. I went downhill to this lovely town called Vranov nad Dyji, then went back up ignoring the campsite I passed, then somehow ended up back at the bottom in Vranov DUH. Then I clocked a shortcut, which turned out to be a vertical incline uphill and off road. I pushed my bike 2 kms, asked myself "how much do I hate myself?" And when the answer was zero, I went the fuck back down. It was a good decision! Very pretty lake, and meant that today I did all the hills in the morning and was like YEAH. Uphill means downhill. Downhill means uphill. Uphill also means views! Expansive countryside and trees galore, and more cyclists. It occasionally goes through forests and national parks, which is great, but less so on a bike carrying my entire life!

I bought some incredibly dorky middle-aged-man sandals and have got sunburned feet. Tonight I'm staying in a 'penzion', some kind of hotel I guess, in a little town. Because holiday! Because tomorrow I'll probably be in Austria if all goes to plan. And Czech is cheap (don't tell them I said that). I've had a great week of camping in quiet places, and getting loads of sleep, but everything in balance, innit. A double bed! Brilliant. I'm maybe two or three days from Vienna? I've been making days less in distance because it's surprising how much hills and heat add to time. And eating and basic human needs take a while too! So whilst 80 km is grand if it's flat and smooth, rough and hilly is more comfortable at roughly 60 km. It'll be nice to sit still in the city once I'm there. Do a recovery, sort out my everything. I can't bear chucking anything out. What if I need two bumbags?? Two spare innertubes? All of my things will have to be burned on returning home.

Austria, Slovakia & Hungary

Thursday, 11 June 2015 Austria: Vienna! Touchdown! Nearly 500km in a week (a total of 8 days cycling, Thursday to Thursday). And what a lovely week it was. Yesterday was the day I crossed the border from Czech to Austria. Underwhelming border crossing number 6 of the trip. It was really interesting to be within the same landscape but have both the signs and the type change very obviously German. Had to relearn the signage! I was worried, but it got easy once I got the hang of it. Yesterday was a bit of a boring cycle day, I think because I'd had a couple of goodies before that. It was a bit flat and bare. But good I guess since I pressed on to my goal of crossing the border. The landscape eventually changed to some undulating patchwork farmland, which was nice. The first town I stayed, Poysdorf, was weird! Big lorries rumbling through the centre. I guess it must be a gateway. Pretty intimidating; I worried Austria would be as car-centric as Germany. I met the same old couple I had met in the last place, and wasn't sure if I felt good or bad about going the same pace as them! At least I got there first. Pride intact. Today's ride through Austria was nice and easy, following the Euro Velo route 9. Simple enough, felt quite straight. Few hills, but nothing I'm not used to! I plugged in my headphones it was such easy riding. Signs got harder closer to town (standard). I did the usual hot and bothered and exasperated hunt for hostel. I got a flat tyre a few kilometres from town and think I actually laughed out loud at the typicality of it (why does it always rain on me, etc.) Swift tyre change. I chucked the tube away â&#x20AC;&#x201D; pro tip: don't buy the cheapest inner tube off of Amazon. Vienna's big! But looked pretty from what I saw. Tomorrow I'll look around more. There's fucking snorers in my dorm. I could tell just from looking at them. This is an undesirable skillâ&#x20AC;Ś I'll have to get my tent out.

Sunday, 14 June 2015 Austria: Stress & Rest Still chilling in Vienna! This morning I decided that I would stay another night since it was due rain and thunderstorms, and I don't enjoy camping in the rain! I also think I enjoy relishing deciding what to do based on a number of variables in the morning. Such freedom! (If dictated by the weather, or how much I had to drink last night). My time in Vienna has been both stressful and restful, as the title suggests. The people snoring in my room were inconsiderate as much as they were nasal, so I longed for quiet. Then I moved onto a camp site to save pennies and get a quiet night, cue puncture and noticing a giant hole in my tyre itselfâ&#x20AC;Ś So I spent one day doing organising, fixing, sorting life out and fucking up simple instruction and catching trains. I felt so incredibly lost without my bike! So powerless! Even if I'm not sure where I'm going a least I'm in charge of fixing it. On trains, he could be driving me anywhere! I survived, got a new tyre, happily reunited with my BFF. After stressful day of tyre hunting (I hate shopping), I went back to camp and some fellas seen me with a tyre and insisted they help the damsel in distress. Quite annoying, but I put up with it for the company. Plus, they also gave me beer and food so WHATEVER sexism. We spent the night speaking in disjointed English words, gesticulations, and taking it in turns to shrug dismissively.

So today was tourist day. Also because it's a Sunday, which means this great forward-thinking, LGBTfriendly city returns to the dark ages and nothing's open. But it was also pretty great cos the streets were quiet so I remembered how to walk again. Lots of big pretty (ridiculous, when you think about it) buildings, spacious paths and winding streets to counter balance. It was nice to be somewhere calmer after the tourist storm that was Prague. Cycling in the city is glorious and easy. I spent a lot of time at Museum Quarter, since it was a good place to sit and people watch unashamedly (I think my degree in graphic design has just made me great at observing people). Free WiFi aplenty but no free place to piss. This is it now. Tomorrow I cycle to, or in the direction of, Bratislava, following the river Danube. It'd be rude not to, it's only 70km away! Plus, I bought a map so I can cycle it back upstream through Austria. Maps are so comforting, and it also stokes my misplaced traditionalism. I hope the rain makes it cooler, and it'll also be nice to have something different to moan (to myself) about.

Tuesday, 16 June 2015 Slovakia: Bratislava Because why not. Because I could (these are phrases that sponsor this trip). And because Bratislava's so close to Vienna! I made it about 80 km because my hostel was on the other side of town, but it's probably closer to 70. I followed the cycle route along the river Danaube and it was nice and easy and flat. Rivers = flat. But this does mean it gets a touch boring, but you can just crack on. I started going, and then mid way through got caught in a storm. Absolute laugh a minute. I actually very much didn't mind, since it was still stupidly warm! It's safe to say I was the only one in a T-shirt, shorts, and sandals at that point! I figured there wasn't much point in getting any other clothes wet. The storm passed and I dried in no time. Initially I wasn't going to go all the way to Bratislava but I couldn't resist the challenge of going from capital city to capital city in a day (as much as I pretend it's not about speed or distance). It's quite bizarre! And they're such different places too.Vienna felt huge, it took me 20 km to even get on route! And then Bratislava is so small I don't have to cycle to get around anywhere. A bike less day! Refreshing. Today I've been doing more life organisation to make me feel human again. Washing clothes, in a washing machine! Buying a dress that isn't falling off my shoulders. Sitting in nice places. I'm the worst tourist ever, I don't give a shit about old buildings unless they're partly demolished or particularly remarkable. I still haven't decided whether or not to go all the way to Budapest following the same route, or go straight back on myself tomorrow. Maybe I can get a train to Vienna after. I met someone else in my dorm room doing the same journey as me (just the river one) so that was nice. I need reminders that I'm not an individual!

Sunday, 21 June 2015 Hungary: Budapest Three days from Bratislava to Budapest following the Euro Velo 6! These were harder days than I've got used to. Getting out of Bratislava was easy enough, then had a slightly boring but at least easy ride to Gyor. For some reason I felt exhausted at the end after around 80-90km so cheated and stayed in a hostel. I'm so unused to crossing borders so quickly I totally forgot there would be a different currency! Day two was a bit harder and I spent my day swearing at 'cycle paths', and then at my flat tyre. So many flat tyres. But then a guy I was chatting to at the hostel named Jean who was doing the same route caught up with me, so we rode (albeit a little in circles) together to the next campsite and fell a bit short of target. Again, I was pooped. This short-falling made our third day to Budapest even longer! But at least the route got a bit better. There were a few horrible main roads (on one we decided to have a minor bike repairâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; yikes) but once we crossed the Danube by ferry we reached nice, carless stretches and great scenery. At the end of the day we had done over 100km, and weren't even in the city yet. I was dying. Dying of cycling. But of course we made it and settled in the first hostel which was right by a club, so I fell asleep to the gentle sounds of girls screaming and people pretending to have fun in order to get laid. I've spent my time in Budapest doing total relaxing. Sitting in parks, not putting any pressure on myself to be a tourist. I don't think I'll follow this route any further south because I like it when it's smooth and sweet, and I think it'll just get harder. So perhaps back to Austria I go. I need to go to a train stationâ&#x20AC;ŚYuck.

Wednesday, 24 June 2015 Austria: Retreating West After a most brilliant weekend of mostly doing nothing in Budapest, I set off back to Vienna on a train (and then gave myself another relaxing day in Vienna before reverting back to being in cycle mode). I also sorted out my incredibly worn down brake pads, by chucking 35 Euros at a bike shop in Vienna called Ciclopia to attach them for me. Saves me breaking anything out if frustration. And it's a nice little shop! I went in previously and chatted about some nice bikes in the shop. This is my lexicon now. To summarise Budapest, it was just me reading my book, drawing, and drinking coffee and beer in various nice places. Catching up on sleep. I stayed my last night in a fantastically chilled out hostel called Shantee House where I felt as though I wasn't that strange girl + bike, for once. More relaxing. And it's nice to feel that people are genuinely interested in what I'm doing. I made the decision to chill in Vienna before leaving based on the weather.Yay, traveling alone. Yesterday I left to follow the Danube upstream in the direction of Passau, Germany. Most people cycle downstream, but fuck the system, etc. It was a nice ride! If interspersed with some showers. Easy and flat. I stayed the night in Krems, about 80 km from Vienna. I feared it may have been a bit too far because I was fucking knackered last night. Trying to eat as well as possible but I was fully in bed by 9 pm (maybe there is such a thing as too many nuts?) My plan is to fall short of Passau and stop following this river at Linz in Austria, then find my way to Salzburg where I've read there are more pretty river routes. Then Munich? Then Innsbruck! Girl without a plan has got herself a plan.

Saturday, 27 June 2015 Austria: Linz From Vienna to Linz in three days, hurrah. Following that good old reliable Danube. So many other cyclists in this route! I must remember that it's June and now legit cycle season (I must have looked a total nut leaving in April). It's quite reassuring to see so many other people, if slightly exhausting to acknowledge everyone who comes my way! I've only got so many pleasant smiles in my head. The last two days were easy going once more. The river is huge and lovely, but I will be thankful for a change of scenery. Feeling less tired once I get back into the swing of things.Yesterday I arrived in Linz early after a 60 km day so it was nice to have unpressured time. I met my first other English cyclist of the trip! He made me English breakfast tea, and it was nice to hear some Britishness (I'm not patriotic, but…) He was very interested in my trip and called me both ‘intrepid’ and ‘inspiring’… I wonder how much of this is based on gender! Also at the campsite were a couple cycle touring with two children, which literally seemed like the worst thing ever, and a Thai couple. We were an unusual bunch! But again, it's encouraging to see. Today I start slowly heading to Salzburg, there seems like a good amount of connecting routes in Austria so I think I'll survive. Mountains!

Tuesday, 30 June 2015 Austria: Salzburg I've had the best few days since dropping off the Danube and going around the Salzkammergut radweg (don't ask me to say it). I followed the river Traun out of Linz and that was easy and pretty. Seen a waterfall, and then stopped the night in Wels because it rained a bucket load and gave me a chance to get my bearings. The next day I went onto the Salzkammagurt and all went well and good until it absolutely pissed down. This wasn't really too bad, I just went a bit further to Bad Ischl where a bloke at a kebab shop told me his life story despite me showing little to no interest. He was an author apparently! (He told me to Google him so I did). He judged me for my sandals. Some days I hate people looking at me. No matter the intention! To be fully left alone is an under rated thing. It's impossible not to be aware of what people think. Bad Ischl was weird and a bit posh, but at least it was pretty looking with the surrounding mountains. After this accidental long day I took it slow to a place called Mondsee. This day was beautiful. The lakes were calm, I passed through forests, said hello to everyone. Took luxurious lakeside road breaks. I am peak relaxed. I couldn't resist getting in the water, and as I did I met another solo female cyclist called Jose. We spent the evening chatting about what we loved about cycling on our own, different places we had been and things we had seen. The importance of doing things your own way! Something I often battle with and conversely get used to. At night some young people who were hiking played guitar and sang by the lake, with a near full moon clear in the sky. It was a good evening for camping. To Salzburg was also easy. I'm camping, the weather's glorious (so naturally I'm hiding). Bought a map for my ride to Munich. Met another French cyclist named John on a 'world tour'! and we spent a few days together being camping buddies. Whenever people hear I'm heading home they say it's sad but I've got so many different places still to come it's not sad at all.

Bavaria

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Sunday, 5 July 2015 Germany: Munich Let's play a game of 'try and remember the last few days'. I left Salzburg on… Thursday? And cycled to a little place over the German border just up the Salzach river. Camped by a lake frequented by old people who classically don't give a fuck about their unmaintained bodies. I am envious. On Friday I also didn't get too far. I was struggling with the heat and occasional hills once more. Stopped at Bad Endorf and as I had just got to the top of the ridiculous hill noticed some other cyclists ascending and guessed it could only be for camp too! They were from Innsbruck and around my age so good to talk to people my own age (and with good English… I hate how important language is to conversation but I miss being understood and not having to think about what I say with utmost measure). We drank beer by the lake and got so covered in mosquito bites it looks like I've a disease. We cycled the next day together for a bit which was fun! Everyone at the camp offered us coffee and things like we were orphans. So much human kindness. Then we parted as I got on the (vague) road to Munich. A tiring day… Managed to make it 100 or so km by the time I had weaved around all the safest routes. Lots of fumbling with maps and sign gazing. Now I'm in the city and I'm tired of the city. I'm tired of myself, can I leave for a bit? I'm great and all but I wish I could excuse myself for a day or two. Content with nothing.

Thursday, 9 July 2015 Germany: Ridiculousness Oh, I am tired. Oh, my poor legs. Before leaving Munich I took a trip up the road to visit Dachau, the site of a pretty big concentration camp, because it was so close to Munich. Creepy how close it is to other people's houses. There's still remains of the train track that used to transport prisoners, one train found after the liberation containing hundreds of dead bodies who didn't make it. I thought people who lived there must find that a bit awkward to explain to guests. I cycled there and stayed the night in a room by myself and basked in that glory. Silent sleep! Beautiful. The next day I passed back through Munich and camped south of there, on my way to the route leading to Lake Constance. I followed the river Isar that flows through Munich and it was simple enoughâ&#x20AC;Ś Cue storm two of the week! Thunder and lightening is terrifying from inside a one man tent. Every flash seen from behind my eyelids! I'm not even sure of my tent's storm holding abilities, but it seems okay so far! Just had nervous sleep. I can do bad sleep if I know I'll eventually get good sleep! Next day I followed the river from Wolfratshavsen, through Bad Tolz, and ended in Kochel or nearby (its important to keep note of all these meaningless names!) I was glad of the cooler weather, and something about cycling in the rain brings out the happy 12 year old boy in me. At Bad TĂślz I joined the Bodensee-Koningssee radweg after deciding not to bother with going to Innsbruck.

My newest favourite odd food stuffs is carrot and honey juice. The shit I eat. After being sodden through I headed for the hostel on map but LOL it obviously isn't open, why didn't I guess from all the sign posts and door bell. I caught a bus (a bus!) to the nearest town that did have one, but ended up staying in a hotel that costs as much WITHOUT THE CHILDREN. To justify it, I dried all my things all over the room, took two showers and ate an inexcusable amount of breakfast. So this morning I was off route for no reason. But followed directions back to the route off some mountain bikers with sideburns, which led through the mountains which will 'definitely be fine!'. Obviously this led to extreme dodgy gravel path, sharp downhills, and water crossings. I laughed at the ridiculousness which would go on to rule my day! Today was tough.Very windy, hot and cold, hills and lots of breathcatching breaks. Then I took a wrong turn up a mountain because I'm an utter fool and only turned around when I was SURE it was wrong (the idea of going back up made me sick). Pushing my bike is an entirely different and equally hard work out! Eventually I went back down (so steep!) and sat down at the first campsite. "It's all part of the adventure", she says through gritted teeth.

Tuesday, 14 July 2015 Germany: Lake Constance I'm currently in the midst of a few days of genuinely doing nothing at my friend's pen pal's house in Ravensburg. It's brilliant! I'm enjoying small things like using a laptop, sleeping in quiet rooms and profoundly not cycling. Also Eva is lovely and it's nice to chat to someone genuine. I got to Lindau following the Bodensee-Konigssee Radweg on Saturday afternoon after leaving Immenstadt. The camp at Immenstadt was quite full and cramped again, but I minded less because I met a fella called A'kos who was hiking for 6 months West (here's his blog: ontrails2015.wordpress.com). I hadn't met a long distance hiker yet so it was interesting to hear the similarities and differences in our ways of travel. Both slower than most means, and you can really notice the difference speaking with anyone who decides to travel in these ways because they generally have a greater sense of distance and time. Also a heightened awareness of the things that just really aren't important. If you meet a long-distancer, you definitely have genuine things in common! From Immenstadt to Lindau it was mostly downhill, which was brilliant fun (even more so because I knew I wouldn't have to go back up again). These little things make you feel like a child and that's great. It's also good to appreciate the downhill after several quite tough days, I gobbled up those kilometers. The route is easily sign posted and I didn't envy people doing the route in reverse.

Camping again in Lindau, yuck, gross, again. People are so inconsiderate! I forget that people like to use camping as an unusual way to socialise and 'get away from it all' and do exactly the same noisey shit they do at home. But in the city on the island there was a festival, so I got to see some music and people all seemed to be having a good time. I got chatting to a guy who lived there who asked what I was doing and was so impressed he bought me an ice cream (free ice cream for the second time this week!), and I am not a fool enough to refuse ice cream. Lake Constance itself is pretty but I've seen quite a lot of pretty lakes so far so I wouldn't put it as a highlight, and I'm not bothered really about cycling around it. In the morning I popped to Bregenz in Austria just because I could (the lake borders Germany, Austria and Switzerland which is quite unique) and also to hunt for Wifi because they're apparently very tight with it in Germany. Next day I came here, to Ravensburg, about 30 km up the road, after a chill day. Followed by more chill days. I am fantastic at doing nothing and being satisifed by existing. Tomorrow I leave to hopefully cross into Switzerland and then once I'm there I'll find the nicest way through, but I'm not worried because their cycling system looks fantastic and it's a pretty small place. Then through France.

Saturday, 18 July 2015 Switzerland: Zurich & Lucerne I'm writing this from a bed again, I am so pampered. I'm in Switzerland! It's nice and small again, I'm reassured that I can get from city to city in about a day and that's a nice feeling. I left Ravensberg (reluctantly!) and on that day crossed into Switzerland taking a short ferry over Lake Constance (which was a nice change!) It was odd to cross what nearly felt like an actual border because they're not part of the EU. I nearly cried at the change of currency in the supermarket (but I'll cry at anything just because no one knows me and I can). I went along the Rhine route following the river and then accidentally stopped and camped right by where I had to turn to get to Zurich. Happy chance! I felt a little lonely after my days of company but survived. To Zurich was a bit tougher but do-able in a day. Couple of climbs, and then I lost the sign posts on my way to the city and got all in a fuss in the midday sun and traffic. I always forget how traumatising cities are! Even though it's small. I swallowed my pride and asked directions and once again, survived, but it was close. I camped two nights in the city by a busy main road and it was pretty loudâ&#x20AC;Ś I'm so delicate. Maybe a whole day was also too long in Zurich! I went to an art gallery and visited an exhibit on Europe which was interesting and made a change from my usual 'sitting down in nice places' routine. After that I got bored and I hate admitting that I'm bored.

Today I left Zurich and obviously made a very easy route stupid and difficult by thinking I knew better than to follow the road signs. Once I got going it was dead easy and I'm in Lucerne for the night! It's nice here, closer mountains and a good atmosphere. There's a festival on tonight called Blue Balls (lol) and I seen some good music! I miss watching music so I like to catch whatever I can. My second accidental festival of the week! I also met a great woman called Cecilia who welcomed muddy me into her home. She had motorcycled across India, among other bike trips, so it was very cool! Tomorrow I'm playing by ear. Such a good feeling! Head towards mountains and see how ambitious I feel.

Tuesday, 21 July 2015 Switzerland: Bern I've adopted a new strategy of not spending longer than a day anywhere after my restlessness in Zurich. I quite like it! I arrive in the early afternoon, set up camp, then go have a look around town in the evenings, then have a late start in the morning. It works quite well here because distance between cities is comparatively small so I still have energy left (â&#x20AC;Ś sort of) On the day I left Lucerne I had a stressful morning trying to get around a shop navigating through crowds of Asian tourists on bus tours. I am especially anti-crowd now, my reflex is 'abort!'. I didn't have much of a plan besides going south and seeing how it goes. I followed route 9 on Cecilia's recommendation as the least steep route. For a while it was lovely, pretty and flat. Then I came to an incline of 200m and thought I'd try it, and that was manageable (if hard!). I thought I could do the route if I had a few more of those. Then I got to the Bregenzeiler pass and absolutely and utterly gave up. Steep and gravely! It was 4pm, I was still 10km away, and then the rain started. I put my bike on the next train to Interlaken and basked in defeat. Interlaken was pretty though! If again crazy busy and full of tourists, I wasn't expecting that at all! It sounds like a lovely quiet place. There was even a Hooter's. I'd like to come back here with my climbing gear and do some hikes. I've decided there's no point trying to squeeze everything into this trip. It's too overwhelming and I'm already worried I'm too used to beauty. I'm not sure I could do this for too much longer and still get the same from it.

So after my failure I decided, okay, let's stay flat, and headed to Bern following route 8. First part pretty, second part boring. Sorry Switzerland! Flat equals easy but often goes hand and hand with boring, especially as I left the mountains south. I needed the flat day though. Did about 70km in the end after some stupid signs (lack of) for roadworks which just didn't point me in any direction at all. Fumbled around, ended up on quite a big road, swore, was terrified. It was okay, I found it. Camp at Bern was served to me on a plate! To save money I take cold showers because I resent paying. I've had a brief look aroundâ&#x20AC;Ś It's nice! Today I'm heading towards the direction of Basel where the route connects to the euro velo 6 through France. But I'm only gonna do about 40km and chill out because my legs are a bit achy and I keep going to bed at 9pm. I keep thinking of what I'm gonna do when I get home but I know I'll miss it when I'm back and lock myself in my (glorious, private) bedroom again.

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Friday, 24 July 2015 France: Euro Velo 6 (Bore du France) Tonight I ache, and I'm looking at a map of France thinking, crikey, that's big. I never really properly have any sense of scale until I start pedaling then look how little progress I've made despite how exhausted I feel! It doesn't help that I did some stupid long days to avoid gravely inclines in Switzerland (my heavy bike utterly stops with gravel underneath, and pushing it isn't much easier either!) So I followed flat river routes all the way to Basel where the Euro Velo 6 begins. Those were nice days! I left Bern in the mid day sun and instantly regretted it, but stopped at the first proper nice campsite in a while in Biel. Quiet and spacious. I slept with the tent door open then woke up and forgot and scared myself. I've decided eating cold soup is the same as drinking smoothies, so it's okay to do in parks. New hobby: finding a nice place, drinking one beer, feeling a bit drunk from it (dehydration maybe?) then drawing the scene. It's fun! After nice camping I woke up at 6, packed up and left at 7. It was great; quiet and cool. I'm really not good with heatâ&#x20AC;Ś I just don't know how to handle the feeling of the body wanting to implode! I am the happiest person on wheels when it's a cloudy day, I am invincible then. I went for a while, and attempted the short route to Basel but as noted, yuck, hills. Or maybe just one big hill, but I saved myself. Pressed on, not knowing where to stop and ended up doing 120km! That's about 70 miles and my maximum day. I slept well.

I followed the river Aare unnecessarily far East before connecting at the Rheine and going to Basel. It was a 'headphones in' day but I was glad I woke up still with energy and happy legs (always surprising!) Route wasn't special, but I at least got into France, if only very just! I stopped after another 100km day just in case I broke.Very happy to be back paying with Euros. There's no getting around it, Switzerland is double the price of everything in euro counties, and you get used to budgeting certain amountsâ&#x20AC;Ś Today was meant to be short, but I got going and thought I'd die of boredom and couldn't face the idea of stopping just to look at the same thing tomorrow.

Just following a big canal! It felt quite frustrating, perhaps this isn't the best route to end my trip on. Then I got in a fuss about not finding camp or anywhere to stay after another 90km and was just done. Done! So I copped out and am staying in a hotel like a princess. But fuck it, no diverting off route at least. I hope tomorrow is easier and more camps are handed to me right next to the route. I might find a map. France is big!

Tuesday, 28 July 2015 France: SomewherE France is big, that's my profound thoughts on this route. I'm struggling with the Euro Velo because it all looks the same, and this is not good mental stimulation for riding a bike for 6 hours a day with only your own thoughts for company. It's good, easy cycling but that doesn't really leave me much to think about. Give me an incline to hate, or an odd country village to get lost around. Since I've been struggling so much I decided the way to get through it is with pure uncharacteristic sportsmanship and set myself a goal of 100km (roughly 60 miles) a day. When you check this on a map even this distance looks like nothing in the scheme of things. But I have to do it this way or I wouldn't bother and just get a train because the achievement is all I'm getting. I mean, you also meet some nice people. It's a very popular route and cyclists are a lovely bunch, all willing to say bonjour and express surprise that I'm doing this mind numbing route alone. I've had some terrible head winds to make matters worse. It slows you right down to a very unsatisfying crawl. I guess I am heading to the Atlantic where there is the current bad weather. I've meet two sets of British people! One older couple doing a curiously similar journey to mine! They headed off in April and have gone in the same general direction as me. More assertion that you are never an individual. Though they cut out more hills than me. Retrospectively those days were probably my favourite because you get to feel part of it a bit moreâ&#x20AC;Ś You have more perspective on the land, and its edges, and obviously the pay off is going down. The male in the couple refused to measure in kilometres and in an odd way I kind of respected him for his nonsensical stubbornness.

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There were some hills yesterday, which were exciting but my legs were not prepared. They've had a week of very long days so I'm surprised they still work. But I'm going fast as the way to occupy myself. The cities I've been through are nice but only for an evening. Most people are friendly and sympathetic to my lack of language. A Frenchman told me I should learn French because it's a beautiful language and I told him he was biased. Today it's rainy but that's my element, anyway. I'll be able to breathe from my gills again. I'm eating so much bread but it's fantastic so who cares.

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Saturday, 1 August 2015 France: Tour Ending in Tours A quick and unexpectedly easy turn of events! Yesterday I cycled to Orleans not even realising it would be my last ride through France. I powered through too because I knew I was going to try and get some trains once in Orleans and trains scare me. But I had a lovely week! Luckily the route got more interesting (that, or I'm entirely brain dead) and I started following the river Loire instead of murky brown canals. Prettier! God, I can't remember anything. I'm too train nervous to write. One day this week I met a guy called David who was British so naturally we struck up conversation, and even cycled a while together since we were going the same way. Always fun when that happens since its so rare! And good not to have a strict plan to allow for days like that. Another good thing about such a popular route is that you see people every few days if you have the same pace and routine, and it's nice to see familiar faces at camp sites! And odd to match speeds and such. I did have a few shorter days for the sake of my knees. Everyone I've encountered in France has been lovely. Everyone says bonjour, offers to fill flasks… It's great! Do I have anything else to say about the euro velo 6… It's pretty much flat, signs mostly everywhere

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with a few awkward ones to keep you on your toes (I'm not using a map), passes through pretty enough cities… I'd recommend it as a first route which I think is how a lot of people use it. And I'd recommend it with either good company or a shit load of audio books. Last night was a nice last one, the moon was out and camp was quiet. This morning was the first morning I packed my stuff away properly in four months. Four months! I'm scared. Please can nobody ask me what I'm gonna do with my life next.

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Wednesday, 5 August 2015 Home: Order Restored Leaving and coming back are the worst parts. Not necessarily because I'm sad to be back, but because of all the fuss and hassle that coming home entails. I ended my journey with trains, cycling, ferry crossing and lastly a car journey crammed in the back with my bike. I thought it'd be best to get all the crap things done in one day. Of course I blundered and cycled on the right immediately after getting off the ferry. It's quite deeply entrenched and even after a few days I'm confused at road crossings and it just feels weird. Bristol feels very big and busy and bustling. Everything's so loud. The roads are full of things that can cause punctures. I feel as though I should be wearing clothes brighter than the sun, emblazoned with 'please don't kill me'. On the second day I took my bike in to be serviced, since she's had a tough time and held out well. We'll see the damage done. I relished removing my Entire Life from my panniers and putting them on a wash so high they were incinerated at the same time. I'm sleeping in a million blankets even though it's technically summer. My dog recognised me and has immediately resumed his love for me as 'walk provider'. My best pal said it was like I've never left. I do not come back a changed woman but an even more confirmed one.

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I now say 'sorry?' instead of 'pardon' or 'what', because somewhere along the line I realised that's the most British sounding thing I can say to someone who starts talking to me in another language. I convert to kilometers to see how far something is and how long it will take me. I have so many clothes that I don't even know how I ever decided what to wear. I'm eating all the food I missed at the time hoping I'm still metabolising fast enough. I fear people asking me how my trip was, because I haven't practised summarising four months into a sentence yet. It's weird to have people I know and like at my disposal again, so I haven't been in any huge rush to see and talk to everyone. I like walking around and noticing the things that have changed. It's reassuring to know that things don't quite stay the same. I bloody love doing boring things. I am the same.

I do not come back a changed woman but an even more confirmed one 105

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After graduating, in an effort to put off the usual decisions actual adults have to make, I decided to swing my leg over my bike and set off for Europe on my own – for the first time and with absolutely no long-distance touring experience. Four months and ten countries (… and a lot of tears, tan lines and blog entries) later, it was safe to say it was a success. This book is a record all of my blog entries meticulously crafted on my rubbish smartphone (stealing wifi from McDonalds, laying down in my one-man tent, buying on drink and staying for hours…) as an output to equally brag and complain, and keep track of what I thought and felt each day. My other companions were my camera and my sketchbook. The other working title was ‘How Not to Cycle Tour’.

By Stephanie Weise www.stephanieweise.co.uk www.travelswithmyselfandbike.blogspot.com

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