2 minute read
RUN POTATO RUN
RunRunRunRun POTATO POTATO RunRunRun
The family were about to cut the potato. But before they could, the potato leapt up and said “Hi”.
The family were hungry. They wouldn’t wait for dinner. They jumped at the potato. So, the potato ran for his life.
He leaped off the plate, slid down from the table, ran through the legs of his attackers, down the hallway and out into the street.
He ran and ran, and, as he ran, shocked onlookers filmed him running and jumping and looking over his shoulder. No one had ever seen a potato like this before. Without realising it, the potato was going viral.
As he slowed, the exhausted potato caught sight of a shop full of little beds. Humans call them shoes. He ran into the shop, jumped into one, and fell asleep.
When the potato awoke, he saw a girl pointing at him through the window. She squealed and suddenly there was a crowd outside the shop.
Shoe Shop Bob, who was about to open, noticed the crowd, then noticed the potato, and gasped
“Are you Jeff?”
“Jeff?” questioned the potato.
“That’s your name” explained Bob, “You’re famous! See those people out there? They love you and there are millions more. They want YOU to be a star and I can help you. Whaddya say?”
Jeff the potato agreed, Shoe Shop Bob became his manager and already being a viral vegetable, his route to stardom was easy.
One month after Shoe Shop Bob became Jeff’s manager, an article came out in a paper written
by Jeff himself. It read:
“Hi I am Jeff. I used to be an ordinary potato but now I am a multi-billionaire. First, I did the Hot Dog De-odorant advert, then I starred in ‘The Potato Wars’ movie, then I did the half-time show at Eurovision. After that, Jeff World theme park was built, and I married Taylor Swift. It’s been a blast!”
The article filled two pages, but successful potatoes attract attention, including unwanted attention...
Jeff was sleeping. They slipped through a window with ease. Pitter patter went the feet of his kidnappers. Jeff snapped awake, but it was too late. Before he could scream, he was bundled into a sack and off they went.
Next thing he knew, Jeff was tied to a deep fat fryer. Three weird figures stood above him.
“Give us a billion pounds and we’ll let you go” growled the first villain in a villainous voice.
“If you don’t, we’ll have your chips!” continued the second.
“What will you choose?” finished the third.
Things were looking grim, but Jeff was in luck. Shoe Shop Bob had rounded up the fans, followed Jeff’s tracking chip, and led a thousand followers to the villains’ lair. The rescue was easy.
The next day, Jeff gave an interview about his scary adventure and that’s when he made the announcement:
“You know what? I'm over this fame stuff. I need a quieter life. So, from here on in, I’m going to settle for a career in radio”.