St Louis Sinner issue 19

Issue 19 August 2010

Big Brother

& The US Security State

The 7 Deadly Sins of

Deanna Deadly

UNMASKED

News, Rants & Politics

Sanity is a luxury that most indy publishers loose after the first year, if they ever survive that long. Of course, what is sanity, or rationale, in the first place? And who truly defines it in each of us? Is the drone worker who never takes a sick day or calls in late any more sane than the free-minded worker who questions authority and its authoritarian rule? Is the transient who lives off the land and welfare less sane than the doctor or lawyer who resides in an abundance of wealth and luxury?

Too often in the pursuit of happiness we sacrifice our sanity for the greater good, and that is certainly the case with indy publishers. Too often we slave hour after hour, day after day, month after month, and year after year until time twists into one never ending publication. Days, months and years become volumes and issues, nothing more. Christmases and birthdays and celebrations become secondary functions, as do family and friends. Like I said, sanity is a luxury we either loose, give up on, or simply choose to sacrifice.

But every once in a while, the cracks in the mirror clear, if only for a brief minute. Last month, while others celebrated the Fourth of July with flags and beer in hand, I sniveled about the loss of the American Dream and my existence in a slave labor position.

My days were numbered, and the wife and I knew it. Sanity was forcing its way back through my tears and the snot that dripped from my nose. When the company president joked about not paying for the mandatory Monday off, I suggested we needed to unionize his global company. His eyes lit, and his head shook with a bit of fear and a great deal of irritation. When his sexy, yet slut wife, who once made comments about “cumming in her pants” asked why I looked so down, I said because I hated that place.

But then I was told production had to increase so the owner could reach his goal of opening several more plants here in the US, something great for everyone without a job – that’s the sell anyway. In truth, he needed more slaves in the fields, whether we be picking cotton or pouring concrete, or our skin be brown or white really not matter, as long as it’s done for minimum wage. Insanity led me to kick it up a notch, to push through the intense heat until I literally came to the point of complete exhaustion, muscles spasms and dehydration – death’s bed only yards away. But the boss only said great job as I left under these dire straights, with all the work done for the day 1/2 hour early.

The next day, sanity broke all to Hell. I called in to let him know I was done for the day, that I probably needed to go to the hospital but would save his dime and sit at home for the day – a plan he said fine to. Hours later, he had the secretary make a cowardly lie, the one that many young slaves have yet to hear, “to take the next week off while they worked on the scheduling.” The insanity of survival which placed me in this position told me to say, “Yes-am, miss secretary.

I’ll wait here for you to call.” Instead I told her that I had choked as much of their slave labor that I could stand, to shove it and weep. Minutes later the slut called, with her slut-like manners, asking how I was doing? I explained much better. Then she asked about my remarks to the secretary, which I confirmed. She then said not to come back. So I let sanity fly, letting her know that this job really not matter and that I was sick of seeing her slut-ass everyday

anyway. “I hope you choke and die, bitch!”

Goddamn, it feels good to be sane, if only for a minute or two, even though some would say that my minced profanities were a bit unsound. Well, to hell with them, too!

A few days later the big 41 hit, the birthday. I was born at night, so I celebrate it then, when there’s something to celebrate. Not that it really matters to anyone, what I choose to call it or even that it passes. It’s just another day, another night passed – another issue done and another on the horizon. It’s the life a transient publisher can expect, years away from family, friends, and even socalled friends who always manage to find their way to your parties. But when so many pass you by, you almost miss those so-called friends stopping in. And you certainly miss the card or call from a loved one or good friend. Maybe that’s another thorn of insanity in indy publishing, the prick with poison that puts you out behind the wheel of this never-sleeping machine, drifting you closer to the edge with each passing issue.

It can make you wonder where it will all end, the last scene in the big picture of life.

Whether or not you’ll be surrounded by loved ones when they burn your remains and flush them down the toilet or be as alone as you were most of your life bouncing from city to city and state to state. I guess in the end, none of it really matters, except how you have chosen to live. We’ve all been dying since the day we took our first breath. We just like to indulge ourselves in temporary fantasies that keep us from thinking of our final breath. It’s not that we can’t or don’t accept our mortal existence, it’s that few of us know that our last breath is only hours away. Maybe if we did, our last wishes might be lived out in life, not death. If nothing more, we might at least examine our destructive behavior on a daily basis instead of an immortal one. The difference could be huge.

That’s the difference in making last wishes come true and having your last rites served, perhaps the most chilled meal that your teeth may ever bite into. And writing rambles like this at 4am is the difference in being called insane and not caring what those who call you names think in the first place. And I think it’s a lot more sane, even if only temporary, to listen to your heart instead of another’s words – and even if it means telling someone to “fuck off!” when need be. If that makes me insane, then lock me up and throw away the key, or read me my last rites and let me die in peace. It really doesn’t matter in the end.

And that’s another tale of fear and publishing in two cities...

2. Fear and Publishing 3. Late 4. Weapons of Mass Distraction

6. Piper’s Pit

7. Drugs At War

Music, Film, Art & Entertainment

8. South City Crawfish Boil 11. Scene Of Irony 12. Tok Poster

14. Tok Unmasked

16. On The Scene And Heard With Malice 17. Huggy Talk 18. The Sinful fashion of Kristine Hawthorne and Noel Austin

Religion, Sex, & Other Sinner Shit 9. Our Sinful Community 10. Becoming The Circus 19. Skin Deep with Stu

20. Campfire Tales

21. On Practicing The Art Of Love 22. 7 Deadly Sins of Deanna Deadly 23. Ask The Slut

Publisher: Chuck Foster - Layout: Terri Daniels Cover Art : Photo by Eader Photography WRITERS, RANTERS, OPINIONISTS & OTHER ALL-OUT FREAKS: Stu Mark Taylor-Canfield Kimberly Peters Rajkhet Dirzhud-Rashid Paul Blow Matthew Gorman Emily Eufinger Lucifer Saab Lofton Gabriel Zolman Gina Simon Malice Henry Nicolle Jason Sibert Bill Oberg The Sinner is a group of contributing writers. Their opinions, rants and ideas do not necessarily reflect the views of The Sinner itself. The Sinner encourages contributions from its readers but retains the right to edit material due to content or length of submission.

For advertising or submission information, contact us at chuck@theseattlesinner.com. Submission deadline is the 25th of every month.

ESSAY | Late

M

y essays are not hard to write. Getting them “right” is not always easy. Getting them complete and submitted is often an “iffy” proposition.

Daily life is filled with the distractions and de-railers of minor and major demands, luscious temptations and exciting rabbit trails.

As I type this, I am late . . . much late for my deadline.

Late is one of those things which you know is happening, and as you watch it grow, you remind yourself that if you don’t do something, that it will get later and later until late doesn’t matter any longer, because it is too late.

I am late for good reasons and without an excuse for being late. . . After all, all that was necessary to avoid late was to “Just do it!”. I must have thought those wise words a dozen times a day before and after the deadline, and did not hear.

Today, as I waded through the swamp of tech support, bookkeeping, e-mail responses, management conferences, taking out the garbage and picking up the mail and a dozen other urgent tasks, I thought about my lateness for my deadline obligations and began associating lateness in a larger sense than my own simple inability to impose discipline upon my activities.

The days come to a late end far too quickly.

The mornings come too early, rush into lunch, trip into afternoon and slip silently into evening. The body aches and hungers as we multi-task to avoid the avoidable late. Then, something slips and something new becomes late.

Late becomes an independent entity, like the unexpected return of a strange and abandoned lover, once (a long time ago) discovered through the lens at the bottom of your beer. You knew it was there, not a bother and not at your elbow, but still, a potential bother. Now it is here, nagging at your sense of responsibility, intruding upon your attention and demanding a new, dominant priority in your losing battle to keep up with the churn of the shortening day.

There are three choices: Get it done, let it get later, let it get too late.

The desirable option is to get it done. But if that is the selection, something else must be neglected and that too, may evolve into late. It is a choice that requires care and discernment in the selection. I usually choose “let it get later”, knowing that I can stop everything else if

by Henry Nicolle

necessary and “get it done” whenever I choose the right time before it’s “too late”.

This time, I’m really late and I am hopng I am not too late for publication. That would be bad. It would screw up my reputation for being more or less about on time and usually not all that late. It takes a while to build a reputation and one screw-up to spoil it all.

So, I am writing two essays as penance and precaution for the next deadline. I hope it’s not too late.

This topic is now going to political and social comment, (as of course you knew it would.

Have I ever written without grousing about the ignorance and innocence of our People?)

I have warned of the period we have now entered, again and again. I have warned and explained over a little more than a decade. Now it is too late for warnings. The sewage is slopping into our slippers, soaking our socks and staining our $300 sandals.

We have spent our time at the party and the beach and in general, goofing. When we could have acted with intelligence and little serious effort to prevent our condition from deteriorating into our present condition, we put the work off.

We were late comprehending the threats, but we still let it go, allowing the resolution of the problem to get later.

Now, it is too late for normal resolutions and we are forced to consider extra-ordinary remedies. Too late for reasonable remedies! How sorry we have become to decay to the point of extraordinary remedies.

Consider what we now face, which cannot be repaired without exceedingly exquisite pain and inconvenience or worse.

Our People have been dumbed into incompetence and indoctrinated into dependence by Federal and State policies which no longer need for an inquisitive and entrepreneurial population.

Inquisitive people ask too many questions and entrepreneurs are not dependent upon the machinations of Advanced Financial Institutions and the Powers of Economic Planning.

We have been taught that debt and indulgence are laudable and that we should shun conservative preservation of personal wealth for our future needs.

We refuse to remove the representatives from office who have made us so pitiful. We have one last option in November. Let us not be too late.

Deny incumbent reelection.

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Big Brother and the US Security State EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, reporters in the US actually do live up to their unspoken oath to “afflict the comfortable and comfort the afflicted.” This genuine obsession for in-depth investigative journalism has been missing from the national media for several generations. The FCC’s refusal to regulate mass corporate media consolidation has led to budget and personnel cuts in almost every newsroom in America as mega media companies strive to optimize profit at the cost of insightful, effective news reporting.

The US news media has failed to provide a vital public service which is completely necessary for the protection of civil rights in any democratic society. Instead of exposing the truth about corruption and illegal backroom deals being made on a daily basis by the higher echelons of our society, the monopolized corporate media giants have continued to glorify our political and corporate leaders and their gross incompetence even in the face of imminent disaster. Let’s face it: US media corporations continue to spread mass propaganda to serve their corporate masters’ aspirations for empire and world dominance. Informing the public about important issues which will affect them directly? Well, that seems to be the least of their concerns. Mostly they just want to sell advertising…

Meanwhile, the country’s two intractable wars, its current national economic system, and the energy infrastructure are all apparently unsustainable. But you wouldn’t know that from watching the hypnotic flat screen in your living room – unless, of course, you are viewing Amy Goodman and the indy news program “Democracy Now!” on Free Speech Television.

Despite this lack of credibility and accountability among most of my journalistic colleagues, on a few rare occasions I have been forced to sit up and take notice of a job well done.

Such is the case with a three-part investigative report published by The Washington Post July 19 – 21st. In the grand old tradition of Woodward and Bernstein, a few reporters who actually got up off their asses and went out to cover a very important story which had not yet been completely revealed.

According to The Washington Post, their expose’ entitled, “Top Secret America”, was the result of an investigation into government documents, corporate and social networking websites, and hundreds of interviews with military, intelligence and corporate officials. Of course, as with Woodward and Bernstein’s secret information source named “Deep Throat”, most of the people the

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written by Mark Taylor-Canfield

paper interviewed requested anonymity because they were “prohibited from speaking publicly or because, they said, they feared retaliation…”

Two Washington Post reporters, Dana Priest and William M. Arkin, were responsible for the three-part series, with assistance from staff researcher Julie Tate. I highly recommend that anyone interested in the US “Secret Government” should go to the Post’s extensive searchable database at washingtonpost. com/topsecretamerica. What these journalists found should shock even the most ardent Big Brother watchers. Here’s a direct quote from the beginning of the first article: “The top-secret world the government created in response to the terrorist attacks of Sept.11, 2001, has become President George W. Bush signs the Homeland Security Appropriations Act of 2004 (PL 108-90) at the so large, so unwieldy and so Department of Homeland Security in Washington, D.C., Wednesday, Oct. 1, 2003. White House photo by Tina Hager. secretive that no one knows how much money it costs, how secret “black budget” projects, intelligence private contractors with top secret security many people it employs, how many programs exist within it or exactly how and security corporations are thriving while clearances are scanned into offices protected the rest of the economy suffers. by electromagnetic locks, retinal cameras many agencies do the same work.”

Some of the top government and and fortified walls that eavesdropping After two years of research, the reporters found a “Top Secret America” hidden from corporate officials interviewed by The equipment cannot penetrate.”

That’s definitely spooky enough, right? public view and lacking in thorough oversight. Washington Post complained that they were After nine years of spending and growth, the not allowed to know what was being done But now consider what we don’t know about result is that the system put in place to keep with the money being spent in their own and you can see why civil rights advocates the United States safe is so massive that its agencies because they lacked the proper were screaming about this from the very security clearance. According to The Post, beginning of the process. They knew that effectiveness is impossible to determine.”

To put it mildly, the security state “In the Department of Defense, where more the US security state would eventually business has become a massive cash cow. than two-thirds of the intelligence programs become omnipresent, all-encompassing With billions being appropriated every year reside, only a handful of senior officials – and totally unaccountable to the people they

by Congress and the President called Super Users – have the ability to even are supposedly trying to protect. Now The Washington Post has proved them to be to fight the “War on Terror”, know about all the department’s activities.”

One of the most interesting people right. intelligence and Here are some startling facts unveiled by security companies interviewed by the reporters was retired US have been reaping Army Lt. General John R. Vines. According the newspaper’s two year investigation: huge profits from to the newspaper, Vines was in command of g o v e r n m e n t 145,000 soldiers stationed in Iraq . He claims 1) At least 854,000 people now hold topcontracts. With that the entire post-911 intelligence system secret security clearances in the US .

Official seal of the Information Awareness Office -- a U.S. agency which developed technologies for mass surveillance billions going unaccounted for in Afghanistan and Iraq, and in the US as a result of the huge government “bail outs” to large banks and insurance companies, we should not be surprised at all to learn that multi billions of dollars are being paid out by the government to the military, intelligence agencies, and private contractors with no strings attached. With massive cash gifts from the taxpayers and under the cover of ultra

is flawed because it’s too big to be effective.

He told The Post, “…it inevitably results in message dissonance, reduced effectiveness and waste.”

In their article, Dana Priest and William M. Arkin state: “Much of the information about this mission is classified. That is the reason it is so difficult to gauge the success and identify the problems of Top Secret America, including whether the money is being spent wisely.”

“Every day across the United States, 854,000 civil servants, military personnel and

2) 1,271 government agencies and 1,931 private companies currently do work in areas related to “homeland security”, “counterterrorism”, and intelligence gathering.

3) There are over 10,000 different locations across the US where government agencies and private contractors are working on projects related to these programs.

4) The Pentagon’s Defense Intelligence Agency has more than doubled its personnel, from having 7,500 employees in 2002, to 16,500 in 2010.

5) Last year the US intelligence budget (as publicly announced) was twenty one and a half times the size of the 2001 budget.

myspace.com/stlouissinner

6) The National Security Agency (NSA) which conducts electronic eavesdropping, has doubled its budget since 2001.

7) The NSA intercepts and stores 1.7 billion e-mails, phone calls and other types of communications each day. The intercepts are sorted into seven different databases for analysis.

8) Within the Defense Department, there exist 18 commands and agencies whose mission is to “conduct information operations, which aspires to manage foreign audience’s perceptions of US policy and military activities overseas.”

(Some military operations set up their own fake news websites.)

9) In 2001 the FBI had a total of 35 Joint Terrorism Task Forces. Now they have 106 across the nation.

10) In 2001 twenty four different military and intelligence agencies were created, including the Office of Homeland Security and the Foreign Terrorist Asset Tracking Task Force.

11) In 2002 thirty seven more agencies were formed to track weapons of mass destruction, etc.

12) 2003 – thirty six new agencies were formed. 2004 – twenty six. 2005 – thirty one.

2006 – thirty two. 2007 – 2009 over sixty new agencies were created.

13) In all, over 263 organizations have been created or reorganized in response to the attacks on Sept. 11th, 2001.

Priest and Arkin report that an attempt was made to manage the ever-growing US security state in 2004 under the Bush administration through the creation of the Office of the Director of National Intelligence (ODNI). The Washington Post reports, “the first problem was that the law passed by Congress did not give the director clear legal or budgetary authority over intelligence matters, which means he wouldn’t have power over the individual agencies he was supposed to control.”

According to The Post, immediately after Ambassador John Negroponte was appointed to head the ODNI, the Defense Department shifted billions into another budget so Negroponte couldn’t control it.

The CIA reclassified some of its information so that ODNI’s National Counterterrorism Center wouldn’t have access to sensitive data. Negroponte and the ODNI were shut out of the process before they could begin to get a handle on the activities of the other intelligence agencies.

Private contractors pose a special problem in terms of accountability. Priest and Arkin report that private contractors working for the CIA have recruited spies in Iraq, paid bribes for information in Afghanistan, helped kidnap a suspected terrorist in Italy, and interrogated detainees held at secret prisons outside the US. Even Defense Secretary Gates admits that the government doesn’t know how many private contractors are now working for the federal government. He told The Washington Post, “This is a terrible confession. I can’t get a number on how many contractors work for the Office of the Secretary of Defense.”

Again, The Post reports, “Contractors kill enemy fighters. They spy on foreign governments and eavesdrop on terrorist

John Negroponte 1st United States Director of National Intelligence

networks. They help craft war plans. They gather information on local factions in war zones. They are the historians, architects, the recruiters in the nation’s most secretive agencies. They staff watch centers across the Washington area. They are among the most trusted advisors to the four-star generals leading the nation’s wars.”

Surprisingly, the reporters make a bold statement in their last article in the series on Top Secret America. They condemn the role of contractors in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Priest and Arkin cite contractor misdeeds in Afghanistan. They claim these incidents have hurt US credibility in those countries as well as in other areas of the Middle East. The Post specifically cites the abuse of prisoners at Abu Ghraib saying that the incidents, “helped ignite a call for vengeance against the United States that continues today. Security guards working for Blackwater added fuel to the five-year violent chaos in Iraq and became a symbol of an America run amok.”

If the information The Washington Post has uncovered about “Top Secret America” is any indication of future trends, then it might actually be true that the entire US security state has now “run amok.” Reporters Dana Priest and William M. Arkin should probably win a Pulitzer Prize for this expose’ on the dangers of giving government agencies and corporations too much power. These agencies and contractors have been granted the ability to conduct unregulated surveillance on both foreigners and on residents of the US. They have increased their power by classifying intelligence data on a mass scale.

Big Brother is indeed watching over us now more closely than ever before in our society’s history. There are currently thousands of contractors and hundreds of major corporations making huge profits from the US military/industrial/intelligence complex – the one that Eisenhower warned us about. After all, the “War on Terror” is a great business opportunity for those who are now prepared to take advantage of the post-911 climate of fear and intimidation.

Obviously, there are a lot of companies in the US willing to cash in on the publicly financed security and intelligence gravy train. These businesses have learned that working for Big Brother is a very profitable enterprise…

Custom Edge Photography

Greg Correll Photography model: Clarissa

SINNER

P a c i f i s t s , N OT M a s o c h i s t s ! written by Saab Lofton “Peace is not the absence of war, but a virtue based on strength of character.”

– philosopher Baruch Spinoza (1632 to 1677) In the Star Wars saga, the Jedi are able to psychically detect and physically manipulate emotions in a variety of supernatural ways. Well, all too many whites in the peace movement are under the delusion that they’re capable of the same exact thing and it’s costing the rest of us dearly.

Vegas odds dictate that a white left-winger is statistically likely to be related to a right-winger, so there’s an inherent conflict of interest, to say the least, since “88% of Bush’s support came from white voters,” according to Oscar winner Michael Moore. Therefore, white leftists are more liable to irrationally extend an olive branch to those clinically insane teabaggers than any other ethnic demographic of activist. Think I’m exaggerating? I just got following e-mail from Code Pink...

“At CODEPINK, we are extending an olive branch to Tea Party activists. While we don’t support the goals and tactics of the Tea Party...

We are not naïve to think that it would be easy for the Tea Party and the peace movement to work together. Our core values are different.

But building peace means reaching out to the other side and trying to find common ground even with those people whose beliefs contradict so many of our own. So we ask you to reach out to your conservative family members, friends and co-workers...” ...I never thought I’d say this, but those bitches have lost their fucking minds! They’re irrationally petrified that expressing any anger at all will somehow result in a fall from grace akin to Anakin Skywalker’s.

And when I recently went to an anti-nuclear event at Seattle University, the advice insofar as how to deal with teabaggers was to attend their churches! What the fuck?! Just because you’re a pacifist doesn’t mean you have to be a masochist!

I can think of three reasons why that’s the worst idea since pet rocks...

First, going to a teabagger church would accomplish less than nothing. According to the Religious Right, one of the ways to tell if an up-and-coming leader might be the anti-Christ is if he/she calls for – and actually succeeds in – the abolition of nuclear weapons! Well, how convenient for the military-industrial complex!

Essentially, unless world peace is instantly/ magically brought about by a WHITE Jesus, the teabaggers won’t approve, so there’s NO way in Hell any common ground can be found. It’s a good thing the anti-Christ wasn’t credited for the Civil Rights Movement – otherwise, my black ass would STILL be sitting in the back of the bus..!

Second, there are over three hundred million Americans and less than sixty million registered Republicans. We outnumber those assholes 3 to 1, so quit acting like we need to cut some Faustian deal with them!

Third, the only reason it even seems as if

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one must acknowledge the presence of these retarded Flat Earthers is that the corporatelyowned mass media has colossally overrated their supposed importance. That’s why it’s important to support independent media like Amy Goodman’s Democracy Now. Look at what she once wrote in The Seattle Times on April 3, 2005, “At the time of the first Persian Gulf War, CBS was owned by Westinghouse and NBC

by General Electric. Two of the major nuclear weapons manufacturers owned two of the major networks. Westinghouse and GE made most of the parts for many of the weapons in the Persian Gulf War. It was no surprise, then, that much of the coverage on those networks looked like a military hardware show.”

No wonder the teabaggers are butt skank stupid!

White leftists are also confused about what it means to be pro-peace, so allow me to explain: Conflict is inevitable, so the only issue is WHY and HOW a battle is fought. Do you defend the defenseless or are you an enforcer for the elite?

Do you fight with a code of honor or do you fight with an adrenaline-addicted berserker fury with no regard for Human rights?

Peace, like war, is a relative concept: A WAR on poverty is beneficial (and it’s bloodless for the most part) whereas the PEACE one can find in an abusive household is NOT. Non-violent conflict resolution is cool and all, but there are times when a motherfucker needs his ass whupt; in which case, use the STUN setting on your phaser! NON-lethal weaponry exists, so start using it!

As Captain Sisko from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine put it so well, “You’re a Starfleet officer. We don’t put civilians at risk or even potentially at risk to save ourselves. Sometimes, that means we lose the battle and sometimes our lives, but if you can’t make that choice, then you can’t wear that uniform.” Now, imagine if the ethics of that fictional character were everyday reality for our armed forces! THAT would be peaceful!

Peace simply means that violence is rare, brief, rooted in morality and absolutely necessary. It does NOT mean gallivant through life like the Eloi from H.G. Wells’ The Time Machine – NOR does it mean dropping to your already dusty knees and kissing the asses of those who’re for war...

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StoptheDrugWar.org Mexican Presidents Talk Drug Legalization Last Tuesday, Mexican President Felipe Calderon briefly opened the door to drug legalization, saying it was something that needed to be discussed, only to clarify in a press release hours later that he remained opposed to legalization.

Now, Calderon’s predecessor, former President Vicente Fox, has stepped up to call forthrightly for legalization The discussion comes as Mexico staggers through the fourth year of Calderon’s war on the so-called drug cartels. Despite deploying nearly 50,000 soldiers and federal police in the fight, violence has only increased, with the death toll rising year after year. And the drug trade goes on, seemingly unimpeded by the campaign.

Fox’s call came in a Saturday blog post in which the ex-president cited the “enormous cost” of fighting organized crime, beginning with the more than 28,000 people the government admitted last week had been killed in World Economic Forum / prohibition-related violence since Calderon came to power in December 2006.

Photo by Remy Steinegger He also cited the cost of corruption among law enforcement and public officials, the loss of tourism, and the threat to foreign investment.

“We should consider legalizing the production, distribution and sale of drugs,” wrote Fox, like Calderon, a member of the conservative National Action Party (PAN). “Radical prohibition strategies have never worked.

Legalizing in this sense does not mean drugs are good and don’t harm those who consume them,” he wrote.

“Rather we should look at it as a strategy to strike at and break the economic structure that allows gangs to generate huge profits in their trade, which feeds corruption and increases their areas of power.”

Fox also called for the “rapid return of the national army to its bases,” saying it was “neither conceived for nor is prepared for police work.” The military’s role in Calderon’s campaign has tarnished its image and led to “more and more” human rights violations, he added. The military’s role should be taken over by a new national police force and there should be direct election of police chiefs and high commanders, Fox wrote.

Under the 70-year rule of the Institutional Revolutionary Party (PRI), Mexican drug trafficking organizations were not so much suppressed as managed, but with the election of Fox, the modus vivendi between traffickers and the state was shattered. Midway through his term, Fox declared war on the cartels and went after their leaders. That led to intramural fighting within and among the cartels and to increased confrontations between traffickers and police, a situation that has only continued to escalate under Calderon.

This Week's Corrupt Cops Stories More crooked prison and jail guards get busted, another sticky-fingered cop goes down, so does a Rio Grande Valley lawman, a former California Highway Patrol trooper is in big, big trouble, and a small-town Texas police force has troubles in the dope squad. Let’s get to it: In Pharr, Texas, a former Pharr Police officer was indicted July 29 on charges he escorted carloads of cocaine through Pharr in his police cruiser.

Former Officer Jaime Baes, 33, is allegedly the nephew of a high-ranking member of the Mexican Zetas and he is also accused of being part of a weapons smuggling operation that sent military-grade bulletproof vests, guns, and grenades stolen from a Corpus Christi naval base south of the border.

In Anchorage, Alaska, a state prison guard was arrested July 29 as part of a major drug trafficking conspiracy that smuggled cocaine, heroin, marijuana, and syringes into the Anchorage jail and distributed them to inmates for sale. Patrick Sherman, 46, was one of nine people indicted by a federal grand jury in the scheme that involved drugs smuggled in coolers and money laundered in Central America. Sherman faces a drug trafficking conspiracy charge. He is out on $10,000 bond.

In Felicity, Ohio, a Felicity police officer was arrested on July 30 for allegedly stealing drug and property evidence he seized during arrests, but which never made it to the evidence room.

Captain Delmas Pack, 42, a 16-year veteran of the department, is charged with tampering with evidence and is looking at up to five years in prison. He went down after a sting conducted by multiple law enforcement agencies. He’s now out on bond.

In Graceville, Florida, two guards at the Graceville Correctional Facility were arrested July 30 for allegedly attempting to smuggle marijuana and cell phones into the prison. Guard Tyler Daniels, 24, is charged with two counts of conspiracy to introduce contraband into a secure facility and attempt to introduce contraband into a secure facility. Guard Mathew Crawford, 23, is charged with conspiracy to introduce contraband into a secure facility. The pair went down after someone snitched them out to a local drug task force, which set up a sting on Daniels, who was doing the actual smuggling. Crawford was charged for helping Daniels bypass metal detectors and searches when the pair arrived at the prison for work. They are currently suspended from Graceville Correctional pending resolution of their cases.

In Auburn, California, a former California Highway Patrol officer pleaded not guilty July 30 to solicitation of murder for trying to pay $10,000 to get a police informant killed. Ruben Salgado, 37, had been arrested in May on methamphetamine sales and gun charges and allegedly tried to arrange for the killing of the snitch who sold him meth that month. He has been held without bail since he was arrested July 14 on the solicitation charge. The 12-year veteran resigned from the department in June.

In Mt. Pleasant, Texas, three Mt. Pleasant police officers are on leave and one has been arrested following a federal investigation. All three worked in the department’s dope squad. The officer arrested, Joshua Hatfield, is accused of selling a firearm and ammunition to an illegal alien and a person indicted for a felony. The other two officers have not been named. The US Attorney’s Office said it cannot comment on an ongoing investigation.

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Crackin’ Shells and Crackin’ Beers: South City Crawfish Boil at Off Broadway Text & Photos by Emily Eufinger

W

ho can resist a spicy crawfish boil on a St. Louis night? Not me—momma raised me right—so I journey east when my stomach groans that lunch is a distant memory and new sustenance will be required to soak up the vast amounts of alcoholic fluids I intend to imbibe during the course of the evening.

Off Broadway held their Second Annual South City Crawfish Boil on July 10, a carryover of Swampstock from three years ago. They are running a bit behind when I arrive … no worries, I grab a PBR, the newest copy of The Sinner, and a corner booth to start jotting down notes.

“Two-hundred pounds of crawfish” can be overhead among the sprinkling of anxious guests and workers. It is a mere whisper, a murmur, and quite frankly 200 pounds of crawfish does not yield a whole lot of meat in the long run, but it spurs the anticipation nonetheless. An enormous German Shepherd named Adeline wrestles empty PBR boxes to show everyone how “vicious” she is.

Giant steel pots steam and smoke out in the venue’s gravel side yard, taunting and tantalizing palates. Someone speaks, “If you look directly into the gumbo it’ll show you how you’re gonna die.” The weather is unusually bearable for St. Louis in July, but I suspect that gumbo capable of denying my brow the luxury of any cool breeze.

A slight exhale and the crowd surges toward the long tables, the assembled taste buds and olfactory glands collectively and immediately aware that the food is ready. On the tables awaits an all-you-caneat spread where no utensils are needed or even provided … the crawfish is simply tossed on some newspaper along with a few spuds, ears of corn, and cornbread muffins. I grab a plate and dig in, hoping everyone else washed their hands, too.

And, oh dear, now the gumbo is ready … question is: am I ready to meet my fate? Muffin in hand, I think I am. The jalapeño cornbread is to die for; the crawfish salty and spiced—even the corn possesses a mysterious heat. And as I take another swig of my beer to combat the heat both outside and in, the gumbo tells me that nothing less than liver cancer will bear me away on snow white wings from this world.

After the feast, the Hooten Hallers from Columbia, MO, started off the music with their primitive rock ‘n’ roll—liberal on the rib chops, thank you very much. The sweaty, two-man band’s bluesy syncopation was much appreciated by the well-fed crowd. If Joe Buck added a second man to his solo act, I imagine it would sound something like this.

As the night wears on and more drinks disappear down my esophagus, my half-inebriated mind may not always remain greatly perceptive, and at some point I’m only able to say “they were good” or “I liked them” … but Fattback rocked the house as usual with their roadhouse-style drinking songs with lyrics about legs and dinosaurs.

Finishing up the night with their blend of bluegrass-punk was the drummer-less and insane Monads—for that is all they can be considered, each and every single one of them, individually and completely, for having that much damn energy that late at night after so many adult beverages.

The show ends and the mob disperses, bellies brimful of bayou grub, heads teeming with good ole hillbilly swamp rock. Sated in every way, we may return to our homes and rest our weary limbs … at least until the demise predicted by the Gumbo of Destiny comes to claim our pickled souls.

8

myspace.com/stlouissinner

HELLO, ST. LOUIS!... AND WELCOME TO THE TENTH EPISODE OF

OUR SINFUL COMMUNITY! Somehow I’m still your host, Chet Chesterson, and my job tonight is to feature some of our local businesses and celebrities with a bit of sinful flare to them.

So all you in the audience please stand up and give yourselves a round of applause for supporting your sinful community, and all you folks out there watching on the boob-tube, give yourself a pat on the back, too. You each deserve it!

Let me tell you something folks... even though I’m a happily married man, there’s nothing more thrilling for me then when The Sinner invites a beautiful young lady to the show. And let me add, they have outdone themselves this time. Just behind that red curtain awaits a gal a few of you may already know. She’s a local actress, burlesque performer, and currently the producer of the comedy burlesque and variety troupe, The Randy Dandies. Everyone on your feet for the lovely Mimi Le Yu....

Alright folks, quiet down, quiet down for just a minute. Looks like you have some fans other than myself in the studio tonight, Mimi. While I have this crowd of rowdy fellows and gals in their seats for a minute, tell me how all this got started?

Well, Chet, I saw the Alley Cat Revue in the fall of 2006, fell in love, and within a few months, I was one of the Alley Cats. Of course, some of you may know that The Alley Cats have since dissolved, but most of us have continued to perform burlesque in some capacity or another around St. Louis.

I always leaned more to the comedic end of burlesque so when the opportunity presented itself this past spring to produce my own show, I took it and ran.

From where I’m sitting, you look pretty refreshed for someone who has been so busy. And we all love burlesque, right folks? But what separates this new troupe from others?

Honestly, we strive to create dynamic titillating entertainment, but we aren’t just a tit show. We are a mix of burlesque, boylesque, specialty acts, singers, drag, and sketch comedy. Our main cast consists of Roxy Red Rockets, Vanity Flair, Jack Deuce, Swifty Deeds, Jiggles McGee and our dirty little pick-up artist, Naughty Bits. We then cast various specialty acts and other burly girls to flush out the shows. We are a sight to be seen!

I have to admit that I haven’t caught a show yet, but I am familiar with you and some of your troupe. I have heard some great things about this Burlesque Bingo you’re putting on though... please fill us in on all the sinful details.

The Burlesque Bingo show was created for the Fountain on Locust, located at 3037 Locust Ave. I had performed there several times and realized what a diamond in the rough it was for a potential show. It’s an old-fashioned soda fountain joint serving up lots of delicious treats and cocktails. Joy, the owner, had come to me wanting a monthly show to highlight the Retro Cocktail Hour. I wanted something different from our big shows, but something that would create a regular audience....BINGO! Burlesque Bingo shows have been showing up in other cities, and I thought, well STL should have one. So in consulting our handy dandy Ben Dover, who is a bingo enthusiast, we created a night of broads, booze, and bingo that only costs $5. It’s the first Thursday of every month and features a small cast of local burlesque performers along with one or two specialty acts.

You know, Mimi, the misses and I love bingo, but as of late it’s been confined to the older and conservative crowds, so much that we just lost interest. But when I heard that you had booze and burlesque with it, we got excited about it again. So, how’s it work?

Players receive an actual gambling-committee-approved 3 card 6 up bingo book allowing players to play 3 cards per round of bingo so they get tons of chances to win. There are audience call backs, silly prizes, and 3 delicious sets of entertainment. Retro Cocktail Hour starts at 8pm with the show running from 9pm-11pm.

Next month on September 2nd, we will feature Moxie Malicious and Fiona Flame along with our kooky host Eileen Flairowitz and other guests. Then on October 7th, we will feature Sturdy Gurlesque, Dewy de Cimalle, and Sammich the Tramp.

Come see us at the Fountain on Locust.

Well, Mimi, I know where we’ll be next month, playing Bingo and sipping ice cream martinis... but if I’m not mistaken, you have another show coming up too, right?

That’s right, Chet. On September 3rd, we are remounting our sold-out sensa-

tion “The Uncanny Dandies in A Comic Strip!” with all new acts, sketch comedy, and video. As every pubescent geek knows and none will admit, those outfits were designed for reasons unrelated to their crime-fighting efficacy and on Sept. 3rd, we present a comics-themed burlesque show to drag these unspoken desires out of their boxes. Performers of both sexes show off their secret identities in the *Uncanny Dandies in A Comic Strip*, an evening of burlesque that definitely wouldn’t earn the Comics Code Seal of Approval.

I always knew there was something other than fighting crime about Wonder Woman than kept me tuned in, and boy did it keep tuned in. So what’s the actual story, Mimi?

Well, Chet, our story begins with Ace Reporter Jack Deuce throwing a party for Aqua Bits, who has just been deemed the protector of the Bionic Pasties because they are too powerful on land. Unfortunately, the Randy Dandy has other plans for the Bionic Pasties and wrecks havoc on the party sending Jack Deuce into a tizzy! Who will save the Bionic Pasties and the World from eminent disaster? You’ll have to come and find out for yourself at Off-Broadway, located at 3509 Lemp Ave, on Sept. 3rd.

And for those who desire a memento from the evening, comic book store Star Clipper and toysofouryouth.com have donated attendance prizes. Doors open at 9:30pm with the show beginning at 10pm...and it only costs $10!!!

I tell you what, Mimi, you have me on the edge of my seat already... what about you folks?

So what do you have planned for the big holidays coming up?

I, for example, will be spending my October performing as Shelly in the St. Louis Premiere of “Evil Dead: The Musical”, a campy and very bloody musical based on the Evil Dead movies produced by Insert Name Here Thehy ap gr to r Pho Tim Barke atre in cooperation with Stray Dog Theatre.

There’s even a blood splatter zone for those brave audience members wanting to get into the hot bloody mess on stage. However, be on the look out for the upcoming Burlesque Bingo shows including a Very Joan Crawford Christmas Bingo Show on Dec. 2nd at the Fountain on Locust.

Speaking of XMAS, what will you be asking Santa for this year?

Hopefully Santa will bring me some new cuban stockings, a tight-fitting corset, and a paddle for spanking Swifty Deeds....teeheehee.

Well, we’re about out of time, MImi... so where can viewers find more about Mimi Le Yu and your upcoming shows?

Currently we are in the process of building a website with the help of Josh Rowan of Evil Prints. Once that’s built, you will be able to check it out at www. therandydandies.com. For now, friend me and the Randy Dandies on facebook to keep up on all Dandies events. You can also follow the Randy Dandy on Twitter.

Alright everyone, how about a big round of applause for Mimi Le Yu... thanks again for coming out, Mimi. And until next month, this Chet Chesterson signing out. But remember one thing, be sure to get out and support your sinful community... I promise, you couldn’t ask for a better one!

BECOMING THE CIRCUS I

would rather lack a cause than lack effect. I still work like an evangelist; I just ran out of gospels many pulpits past, in favor of a Big Top than a bigger lie. But sometimes, it’s not enough to run away with the circus; sometimes, one must become it.

So, I go into the city one fine, skuzzy evening to meet with a man willing to lend a theoretically-legal warehouse venue for a one-shot event, and a shot in the dark, at that. He’d implied that he would possibly even finance some of our bizarre costume themes... provided they were “unique” enough. Naturally--without giving myself too much credit--it is probably safe to say that he had no idea with whom he was dealing, in this regard.

Immediately upon seating, I enthusiastically pitch my concept for a vaguely Lovecraftian-themed dance party called “Cthulhu Rave,” with the tagline of “Party like an Elder God!” I then proceed to offer up my favorite dancer theme yet--even better than our Ku Klux Kuties or Gaza Strippers. I offer: “SQUID-WOMEN OF THE SS.” I show him a hilarious potential flyer and a mockup of a tentacle-skirt with a special thigh-rig that would enable the performer to squirt “ink” (actually Guiness) from between her legs at patrons. “Squid Heil!”

He doesn’t bat an eye. He chuckles. I also explain my plans to have a guest emcee play the part of “Reverend Fucko, The Bi-Polar Clown Priest.” Again, he smiles and shakes his head.

“Will you have some burlesque? People really love the burlesque these days,” he says, talking like an old man going on about “the kids and the rock music.”

“Absolutely,” I respond. Of course, what I wasn’t saying was, “Of course I’ll have burlesque... and by ‘burlesque,’ I mean ‘whichever of my evenremotely-attractive female friends need money desperately enough,’ because none of my regular burlesque performers, nor any of my fire girls, are going to want to touch this show with a 666-foot pole. I’m not even going to ask them.”

In fact, images of Ami, Molly, and Scarlett taking turns beating me with Guinessstained rubber tentacles for even showing them the flyer still resonate in my addled mind.

Come to think of it, that sounds pretty hot. But I digress.

Anyway, he sounds sufficiently pleased. His countenance brightens a smidgen. “What you need,” he says, leaning in, “is a big-draw dancer. What about

10

Or, “On Pitching a Tent”

by Gabriel C. Zolman

that Greta Garter girl? You ever work with her?”

“Um, yeah. I know Greta. Great performer, for sure--but probably not her kind of show. I’ll definitely ask her, though.”

“Do you think she would squirt?”

He’d caught me off guard. “What?”

He elaborates, straight-faced and oblivious: “Do you think she would squirt between her legs if you used her?”

Those are his exact words. I’m struggling to maintain composure.

“Oh...the ink? Um...I’m not sure quite how to bring that up. I doubt it. But again, I suppose I’ll ask...” *snicker* Then, his tone grows considerably more serious; he gravely folds his hands, and quite solemnly asks, “Can we make the Squid-Women communists instead of Nazis? We have a lot of Jews out here.”

“I’ll consider it,” I reply. Of course, this is what we call, in industry terms, a “lie.”

“Another thing,” he says in yet another concernedsounding, almost fatherly tone, “about your tagline.

Can we say ‘Elder King’ or something like that, instead of ‘God’? Again, the religious thing.”

“Of course,” I nod, once again utilizing the industry practice, “I’ll give it some thought.”

“One last thing,” he continues, “I would prefer you nix this ‘Fucko the Clown’ stuff. Is that going to be a problem?”

I smirk. “I guess you don’t think Jewish folk are big on fuckos either, eh?”.

“No,” he quickly counters. “I think they’d be ok with that. That’s not my issue.”

“What then?”

He pauses for a moment, and clears his throat. “I just don’t like clowns.”

Ultimately, negotiations floundered and I discarded the entire concept, choosing to make my next “big” project either the less-offensive “Zombie Rave,” or perhaps explore the classier “dark carnivale” theme that Ami and I had discussed for fall. Alas, my fascist cephalopods will remain the stuff of dreams alone.

Quite frankly, it was all worthwhile simply to be able to type that single line.

Oh well. Even under the Big Top, you just can’t please them all.

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@ Johnny Gitto's 6997 Chippewa

text by Malice - photo by Rabid Rabbit

I

Model: Memorie

figured "Scene Of Irony" was a pretty cool name for a punk band, and their singer Maurice "Moe" Holmes has been one of my FaceBook friends for awhile now, who's also friends with my pal Shawn Telkamp (hilarious pictures of these two at Lemmons' Super Hero Party). I've been promising them forever to come see a show, and with the whole weekend off I'm always on the prowl for a new band and a new bar with great munchies. I hadn't seen them live before, having probably missed 12 shows, but I wanted to know what I was getting into, so I spent the afternoon watching their videos and listening to "I Played A Misfits song", "Creepy Crawl", "Teabaggin' 2", and "17 Bottles To Go" on their MySpace. This looked very promising, the band has been around for quite a few years now and none of these guys are amateurs. Their blog on how it all began is freakin' hilarious, too. There could be no better combination beyond Donnell on drums and Moe up front, Shawn on lead guitar and Raj holding down the low end – they've got a sound you can sink your teeth in to, old-school punk like it was meant to be.

As we drove up, we recognized Donnell right away out in the parking lot, "there's the guy from the video!" (see, we've done our homework, at least we'll know who we're looking for).

Moe greeted us ( It's always like a little "blind-date" meeting, someone you've only seen pictures of and I never seem to know how to go about it) at the door of Johnny Gitto's, a cozy little place with an amazingly attentive wait staff/cook/ beer-wench Andy who was everywhere at once, serving us up one of the best pizzas we have ever devoured. Every table got the feel of having the band playing in their lap, and there's a great dance floor, if you're so inclined. This was a very happy crowd, almost a meat market atmosphere with pretty girls who knew all the words to the songs, while most of the guys there were in local bands out to support their homies, and to join the show. A couple guys from Midwest Avengers, who we saw at The Library on Halloween, joined Moe and the guys for a couple songs, a few others came up as well. Donnell came out from behind his kit to take the mic, too – and the boy's got some pipes on him!

Scene Of Irony is clearly one of the best punk bands on the scene today, possessing an infectious energy that pounds out raucous feel good tunes with spouting in your face attitude – a guitar parade. If you're a Misfits fan, go see them – if you're an adrenaline junkie, go see them. Friend Moe on Facebook, tell him Malice sent ya!

11

written by Chuck Foster

I

t has been 19 months since we first crossed the state line of Misery with our sights fixed on St. Louis and its local rock-n-roll scene. With no friends and little family here to guide us throughout the many venues who cater to such enthusiasts, we found ourselves at Lemmons for our first show – and wouldn’t you almost know it, TOK was our first St. Louis band. Beyond the blue-collar, diverock feel of Lemmons which curbed our homesickness of Seattle for the night, TOK blessed us with a stellar show, peppered with powerful riffs, karate-like kicks and neckbreaking head spins – perhaps one of the most energetic acts we’ve ever witnessed.

But, overall I thought the band lacked something, that a gear or two was slipping or a piston was misfiring. I just couldn’t put my finger on it. Then we caught the band again about a year later at the recently closed venue, AB’s. I don’t know if brothers Matt and Bryan Basler removed a monkey wrench from the hood of their Hot Rod, or just threw one in and let Lady Luck work her magic. Whatever it is they tuned over the past year caught my attention, and has kept it since. All I know is these guys are tearing up stage after stage, week after week – and the fans are chanting, “TOK!, TOK!, TOK!” for good reason.

TOK came together in a bizarre manner. Bryan was taking guitar lessons from Jimmy Tebeau in the early 90s, most notably known as the bass player for The Schwag. Then Jimmy’s son played drums and encouraged those guys to start a band. While they were talking about that, Jimmy asked Matt if he was interested in playing bass. Even though Matt agreed quickly, there was one tiny problem: he didn’t know how to play bass.

So on the way home that night Matt had his parents and big brother Bryan play tapes and point out which sound

UNMASKED the bass was, a tough challenge since he was only ten or eleven-years-old. A few weeks later his parents found him a Fender Music Master, which is a real short scale bass, and he was in the midst of his first crash course lesson.

Matt and Bryan credit the difference in their sound and stage presence today with getting smarter in the way they do things. For example, a year ago months would pass where nothing happened because they didn’t have a reliable drummer. To solve this problem Matt now plays drums when Mike can’t and their cousin Jason will fill in on bass. And when they head out on the occasional road trip their friend Spencer plays drums. TOK’s new approach is, “We just get it done no matter what.”

I had a lot of questions for TOK about their recent transformation, so we sat down at Lemmons one Sunday afternoon to take a few photos, reminisce that first show, and to give me a chance to Unmask these wild rockers face to face. And it went something like this: Let’s talk about the band’s name, TOK. How did you guys come up with it, and how is it officially pronounced?

Matt: It’s pronounced like “Tock”. The name comes from a cartoon rabbit with an Easter Island statue for a head that Bryan used to draw, and where the name for that came from I don’t know. Aside from the trouble people have pronouncing it from time to time (which we didn’t anticipate) I think it’s a serviceable name for a band. I mean, you couldn’t really hear it and know what kind of band it is attached to. Like, if we were called Skull Crush Death Mammoth or Banjo Haystack there’d be immediate connotations. With Tok though, it leaves it pretty open.

Anyone can feel free to use Skull Crush Death Mammoth

or Banjo Haystack for their band.

With that cleared up, let’s talk about the production of the band’s new disc, Long Tall Cobra Box. Matt: Well, we got frustrated with losing drummers to the point that we just decided to record it ourselves. We’d record scratch guitar tracks at home to save money then go up to the studio and start with the drums. It took us a really long time to get the album done because we would have to wait till the end of the month to get more money.

You know we’d go up and record something, pay for that session, then have to wait till we got paid to go back.

Every part of making it was great though, and I’m really happy with the way it turned out.

Bryan: There’s this guy, “The Surgeon,” who produced it and his real name is Matt Sawicki, but that’s not what the rappers call him. Anyway, he makes all this sound come down like a dream cone cloud and he’s bulletproof when he’s firing out the taste.

Long Tall Cobra Box is an amazing production, on numerous levels. I really enjoyed “Follow The People” the most first, but as the album grew on me, I really began to dig “Cars Drive Much Faster”, “Quick Enough”, and “Rail Road Spike”. Can you give me a little insight into the creation of these hits?

Matt: “Cars Drive Much Faster” started when I was messing around with these chords to some Wilco song. I say that as if I don’t remember which song it was, but I do. I just think I should leave some ambiguity, right? So I was messing around with that song and flipped some chords and thought “Hey, that sounds different.” Originally, we were going to have the intro part with guitar and vocal really, really quiet and when the rest of the instruments came in, it’d be huge. If you’ve heard the first song on Queen’s of the Stone Age’s Songs For The Deaf you kinda get the idea. Somewhere along the way we backed off of that idea, but I still think it would have been cool.

Maybe another time.

Bryan: A lot of my contributions to that album were made up while I was in high school. “Follow the People” and “Quick Enough” were both made up when I was 14, and it really shows on “Follow the People” because I used the word “communistic” which technically is a real word, but barely. The guitar I used back then was a rare Martin solid body with really hot pickups and I came up with that three power chord riff because I was trying to use it to blow up a crappy solid state amp with one knob. I think lyrically it probably just reflects that at that point in my life I decided that there was absolutely nothing good about hippies or goth kids and that there was absolutely everything good about The Replacements.

Who recorded/mixed Long Tall Cobra Box.?

Matt: Matt “The Surgeon” Sawicki did all the studio magic at Suburban Pro Studios. I remember him playing some really slick pop punk radio type stuff for us before we started recording and it had me really nervous. It seems

14

like more often than not, someone that would be accessible to a band in our position doesn’t have a lot of diversity when it comes to recording stuff, but the Surgeon can do anything. I can’t recommend him enough. It’s to the point that people think we get some sort of discount but I really just believe in what he’s doing. We wanted to make an album where we didn’t have to hand it to someone with a disclaimer. You know, like “Well, we just recorded this in someone’s basement so...” and I’m really confident with it. If someone doesn’t like it because of the songs that’s fine, but I’d put a pretty big argument if someone thought the production side was lacking.

Who did the cover art? And please explain the elaborate production of the casing?

Matt: Ashely Scroggins at Scroggins Design did the artwork. I’m not exactly sure where the cigar box idea came from, but I guess just from talking about something that could all work together. Like, the first flap is the cover of the box, and the second flap is a piece of paper laying in the box. When you lift that flap, you can see down into the cigar box. You can see all the stuff laying in the box underneath the paper when the flap is down, although I think everything under it is actually upside down (the upper left should be the lower right). Everything inside the box has some sort of meaning to Bryan and me. There’s a menu from Lemmons in there, a Jason Voorhees mask, toys we played with... I’ve always liked looking at packaging for records and wanted to go a little out of the way to make something worth looking at. I think Ashley did a great job putting it together and I’m sorry that people that get the album digitally are going to miss out on that.

What’s your take on the local St. Louis music scene, or how it compares to other cities?

Matt: To be honest, I don’t have a very good grasp of what other cities’ music scenes are like, but I’ve always had the impression that they are better than what’s happening in St. Louis. If St. Louis was full of terrible bands, I wouldn’t say that. I’d just say “Well, all the bands here suck, what do you expect?” but that’s not the case.

There are really good bands here that people don’t seem to be paying attention to. I’ve had people tell us that we play shows too much, or conversely, that their bands can’t play a show because they only play shows once a month - that being the only way you can get people to come out. But these bands - and I guess the people that are going to see them - aren’t giving themselves enough credit. How many times would you have gone to see the Replacements or the Pixies if they were just some local band? I would have been there every week. I don’t know, I know I’m saying that from a retrospective position too.

I’m guilty of not seeing the bands I like enough, but it’s a 45 minute drive for us every time we go to the city, so I use that excuse. It’s probably not a very good one. I’m really glad St. Louis is getting away from almost all of the Pay to Play shows. I think that’s a HUGE step in the right direction. Clubs should hire bands to play because they are good bands that their patrons will enjoy, not because

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the bands will drag ten of their friends there and spend $100.00 to “sell tickets.” I hope it’s not going on anymore anyway. We’ve never done a show like that and haven’t been approached to do one in a long time. I’d hate to see younger bands being roped in by that garbage anymore.

Bryan: Oh I don’t know. I guess it would be nice if there were always a lot of people seeing all of these shows all the time, cause there’s always a lot of good bands to see now, but I think one problem is that people just don’t have the money anymore. I used to make the 40 mile drive to St. Louis 3 or 4 times a week sucking down gas in a Jeep Wrangler and see all these shows and I had a good time of it, but that is cost prohibitive now. The thing is, the only thing you really have control over is what you do on your own, so all I can do is see as many shows as I can, and play as good as I can. Outside of that, there’s really no reason to go ”tralala, people don’t support local music and the world owes me something.”

What has been your favorite show; and worst? What made each so?

Matt: I remember playing a show at Jefferson College where the people that brought the PA took it before we played. That was kind of weird. I don’t even remember exactly what we did, but I remember it being loud.

Bryan: I think the biggest deal for us was playing with Wesley Willis a few years ago. He really was one of those people that you felt like you knew after you met him, and I guess like he’d say, we miss him a lot like Kelogg’s Corn Pops. He wrote a song about us, which is a lot like being a champion. As for the worst, I think that might have been when we played in Detroit. What pissed me off wasn’t really that the part of town that the gig was in could have been in a third world country, or that they only begrudgingly gave us ten dollars, or that

What sin are each of you most guilty of?

Matt: I’m not sure about that, but there was this one time when Bryan and I were real young and we found this porn magazine sitting in a bag by Festus Middle School.

We were like 10 and 13 and hid it in the woods behind our house for a couple days. Eventually we started to get nervous that our mom would find out somehow and decided to get rid of it. To get rid of it, we threw it on the roof of a church. In retrospect, that seems like something we shouldn’t have done.

How do you two unwind, get away from music and production?

Matt: I do a bunch of stuff that is probably too lame to mention. Play video games, watch cartoons, watch horror movies and documentaries. Sometimes I make Flash cartoons (www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/391671 Bryan: I still have my jeep, and sometimes I lock it in and drive it to the top of a mountain where several wizards ask you riddles before you can pass to the next section.

I think that might be because the mountain is enchanted.

I also have two rusty chevy trucks that I blow money on when I have it, and I have an AR-15 that I shoot things with.

What do you believe to be the biggest misconception about being in a R&R band?

Bryan: At this point, I think everyone knows there’s no money in it, and that it’s a huge sausage festival, so I don’t think there are a whole lot of misconceptions left.

If there was a misconception that people in rock and roll don’t write dog cheers for their dog, they’d be wrong about that. I mean, I do.

What makes all the effort worth while for each of you?

Matt: That’s a really difficult question. By all rational accounts, there’s NO reason to do this. The time you put into it (writing, practicing, packing equipment, playing shows, contacting clubs) to the monetary gain is nuts. And while you’re not gaining money you’re spending it on equipment (strings, drum heads, something to record). For every great show you play, there’s a pretty lame one lurking around the corner. We’ve played shows for one person that we brought, and of course you still go out and play those shows like tons of people were there. I guess I’m just kind of wired to do it. It’s something I feel pretty good at, and people seem to enjoy it.

Bryan: I don’t know, when you play at Lemmons, you get a pizza. That, and you get to use guitars on it, and drums and everything. Not the pizza, but the sound, which everyone can share like a secret mind whisper.

Do you guys have any plans to tour? If so, when/ where?

Matt: We go out on weekends every once and a while. Head to places within five hours or so of St. Louis. I really want to go to the desert.

the sound guy put delays on everything. It was that even though The Stooges, The MC5, and The Amboy Dukes came out of this town, the only thing all these washed-up, hair-metal duds at the bar cared about was Altar Bridge and Creed.

Speaking of other bands, name your top 5 local bands.

Bryan: Well, let’s see, I just saw Tight Pants Syndrome and I really liked that. Plus, The Blink Eyes really know how to rope in a sound horse, and the bass player has a Mosrite. Pirate Signal is always twirlin it over the population. Also, Gasrat is twirlin’’ it over the population and they’re the only other band in town with a Tele Plus. I guess Beth Bombara is technically more of a solo act than a band, but she is a sound angel. Hey, you know what else? The Tilts, cause they’ve got The Andys. Also, Karate Bikini, because they live really deep in Mount Shasta. And the Vivian Girls.

Matt: The only thing I can think of right now to add to Bryan’s list is Soma.

Bryan: Matt really wants to go to all these places in the desert right now, but if we go I want to have my suburban ready so we can drive out to the mountain where you can look down on Area 51. That way we can get the truth Any last thoughts to share with our readers?

Bryan: I just want everyone to know that they can all hold hands with their minds and be free in a sunrise of freedom, and not to let anyone put their heart in a coffin. God loves you!

And finally, how can someone find more about the band/merch/shows?

Matt: Right now the best place to keep up with Tok is probably the facebook page (www.facebook.com/tokandroll) but if you stick “tokandroll” at the end of any social site or in between some dots you’ll probably find some info.

I’ll save you a few minutes searching the net. You can find TOK on the 13th at Just Bills or at Lemmons again on the 20th. I highly recommend one of them!

$40 Piercings

On The Scene & Heard with Malice A VERITABLE GREASE INFUSION

This has got to have been the BEST show I've seen all year, 3 of my all-time favorite bands: local boys The Trip Daddys, the Reebs, and from Atlanta, GA., Hot Rod Walt & The Psycho Devilles – a Triple Dose of Grease, Ink, & Chrome! It's now five days later and I am still blissed out on my grease infusion.

There's just somethin' about a Man & His Gretsch, an Inkedup Greaser bangin' King-Hell outta shit, and a Mad Crazy Bass Player...and not just one ...but THREE. It was a sweltering Thursday night, and I didn't know who else was coming, so it was a pleasure to run into Sheena Queen of the Music Scene (of course she was there, her boyfriend is the hottt singer for The Reebs). We hung out most of the night as she always has scandalous stories to tell me, but more on that later, perhaps. Unfortunately it was way too hot to be inside watching the band, and my husband gets really annoyed with me if I spend too much time drooling on a guitar player (but, how much is too much?), so I didn't spend much time Front Row, Center but we did manage to get a few good pictures before my paparazzi got too hammered. We arrived a bit early and were waay gone before the show promptly started after the swing dancing in Atomic concluded. There were some great dancers present, though. I'm not that coordinated – too much spinning and I'd hurt something – but entertaining to watch, nonetheless, when I wasn't watching various band members, from afar, of course...

It's been a long standing tradition to spend our anniversary Trippin' with The Daddys, beginning with our 16th through, now, our 22nd – THIS is our band, they feel like family, and I can't imagine never not listening to them. I think we've got maybe 156 songs on 5 CDs and there are a few I've just gotta listen to more than once.

Their live shows are unbelievable and unforgettable, not to mention extremely addicting...we must have seen them 1000 times and I want to see them 1000 more, even if I do run out of adjectives to describe these three fabulous men who have become friends over the years. They are

At The Atomic Cowboy inside the SweatBox, pardon me, The Foxhole.

A long, slow lingering burn that’s not going away anytime soon.

photos by Rabid Rabbit

the reason St. Louis is the Rockabilly Capital of the World. Craig Daddy is a tough act to follow and sets the bar for all others – Mad Skillz. One of the BEST guitar players on this planet.

And follow him, others did... Hot Rod Walt & The Psycho Devilles hold their own as serious contenders. We saw them last year for the first time at Deluxe when The Reebs opened for them, which was a GREAT show! Too bad if your sorry asses missed it, and most of you did. I love this band – not only do they put on a spectacular performance strutting on tops of bars, including theatrics with the upright bass – Paul is not content to merely paint flames on his upright, he lights the thing on FIRE! It's the coolest damn thing I've ever seen – they're great guys, fun to hang out with. Paul has a very charming British accent, and Steve was telling us about lighting one of his cymbals on fire, but the lighter fluid dripped off and burned a hole in the carpet, so he doesn't do that anymore. It turns out we know a lot of the same people making our rockabilly scene honestly feel like a tightly-knit family unit.

Walt does custom paint jobs on guitars, cars, motorcycles – just about anything in the world you want pin-striping on, he'll do it. Go have a look at www.myspace.com/hotrodwalt. The Discovery channel is filming some of his work for a show to air in September. Hot Rod Walt & The Psycho Devilles have 4 CDs out, in the finest rockabilly tradition, Out Of The Garage And Onto The Street, Psycho Cadillac (it's an actual car and it's PINK), Supercharger, and the latest one, Night Prowler, each available in most places. These CDs contain songs that linger in your brain for days after the show..."Wicked Times" speaks for itself, as does "Roots Rock Ready", "Thrills For Sure", and "Six Beers In Six Minutes". I love ‘em all. They've also shared the stage with several rockabilly greats – Reverend Horton Heat, Unknown Hinson, and Memphis band, The Dempseys – and they're about to head off to Germany and The Netherlands, then back to the states for another round of extensive touring.

To bring a delightful new flavor to the mix in ending the show, we were pleased to hear some great pornobilly delivered by The Reebs (I always thought Brian Eddie looked a lot like Craig Daddy, so yeah, I'm there – my apologies Sheena for drooling on your boyfriend). Great tunes, even though I don't remember which songs they played that night because I was hammered, but they sounded better than ever. All I know is that I hated for the night to end before it was over. Real life blows when I have to cut short my nightlife in order to be at work the next day...and be HAPPY about being there.

It is, after all, still our anniversary week, and the honeymoon's not over yet. Nothing better than great music, live shows and all sorts of "Billy" from rockabilly to psychobilly to pornobilly on the top stacks of my night stand for a happily ever after.

Blissed Out for another Week til my next FIXXX. Malice

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Sinful Suggestions For STL Entertainment ANDRIOD LUST with MANKIND IS OBSOLETE Thursday, Aug 12th @ The Crackfox TOK with special guests Friday, Aug 13th @ Just Bills BUTCHER HOLLER Saturday, Aug 14th @ Fred’s Six Foot Under

by Paul Ace Diamond “Huggy” Blow

HAPPY SUMMER to all my readers! It’s time for maxin’, relaxin’, chillin’, drillin’, and thrillin’!

I’ve been having a blast so far hanging out at the local water parks where I’ve been cruising the beaches in my plastic thong, swimming with the fishes, practicing tai chi, and performing spoken word on a totally random basis to total strangers. All this while wearing suntan lotion with an SPF of 150. Gotta keep my studio tan intact, you know. Last but not least, happy graduation to the class of 2010! If I didn’t get a chance to sign your school year book, here you go: “It was awesome getting to know you this year. Home room was a blast! Stay cool this summer and I’ll see ya at the keggars!

-PDB” Now on to some questions that have rolled into the Huggy Talk inbox: Dear Huggy Blow, I plan on doing some cruising this summer in my sweet-ass 1978 Camaro, but I need some new cruising music. I’m a little tired of Van Halen and AC/DC. What do you recommend for me? Thanks! —Billy Hotrod (Bellevue)

LIVE LOUD N LOCAL MUSIC FESTIVAL August 27-29th @ FUBAR over 35 bands, headliners are: One Day, Buried Beneath, The New Translation, Summit. Event is hosted by Christine Dolce, aka: Forbidden.

NY bad boys, Warrior Soul

Dear Billy Hotrod, You were right to come to me... What’s good for cruising music for the Summer of 2010? Only the most awesome Rock album ever released on this planet, I’m talkin’ about Warrior Soul’s The Space Age Playboys, released in 1995, featuring my main man Korey Clarke on vocals and the most righteous punk/glam/hard rock songs you’ll ever hear. Perfect for cruising, so check it out. Also, the Partridge Family’s Greatest Hits is good for cruising and is always a hit with the ladies. Trust me!

Dear Huggy, Your column was required reading this last year in English class at Nova High School. Do you have any advice or words of wisdom for those of us who graduated this year and are now entering the “real world”? —Beverly (Seattle)

One hundred and thirty six million years ago (during the Jurassic period) dinosaurs ruled the earth and out of the chaos came the band DinoFight! However, they would not fully form until 2007 A.D. The combination of Dinosaurs, Aliens, Zombies and Werewolves were enough to shock, amaze, and tantalize the masses (at least in the STL).

Check out this bands first official CD Release happening Friday September 3d @ Vintage Vinyl (for a warm up to) Saturday September 4th at The Schlafly Tap Room, also featuring Egg Chef and The Ultraviolents

Dear Beverly, My best advice for you guys and gals entering the real world is this: brush your teeth twice a day, don’t get married ‘til you’re at least 30, do 100 sit-ups a day, and don’t work at Micky Ds for more than three months... follow that and you’ll be just fine.

Dear Huggy, My question again is where we can find a wonderful man such as you out there... is there really such a person that every woman can have or find? —Psycho Sarah (Detroit lakes, MINN) Dear Psycho Sarah, I don’t usually publish questions like this one, I just print ‘em, frame ‘em, and hang ‘em on my wall. But it’s a valid question that deserves a valid answer. I’m afraid that men like me are one of a kind, rare gems indeed, and most women will have to go through life without ever finding such a person as myself.

I apologize for that. The good news is that hopefully cloning will soon be legal for human beings and I will mass produce my line of Huggy clones which will retail at a reasonable price. In the mean time you’ll have to settle for my Huggy Blow action figure!

Batteries not included.

HUGGY BLOW’S FASHION TIP OF THE MONTH: Ladies, Daisy Duke shorts are what’s going on this Summer, I guarantee it. Men, you should only wear shorts if it’s 90 degrees or hotter, ‘cos I don’t want to see your hairy-ass legs... Word! _________________________________________ Got a question for Paul Ace Diamond “Huggy” Blow? Got naked pictures of your hot mom? Email them to “Huggy” at paulblow@gmail.com. And visit the Paul Diamond Blow website at paulblow. tripod.com

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THE SINFUL FASHION OF

KRISTINE HAWTHORNE AND NOEL AUSTIN Interview by Chuck Foster - Photos provided by Eader Photography

A

few months ago when I sat here in St. Louis contemplating the suspension of this alternative outlet for politics, music and art in Seattle, I was contacted by Kristine Hawthorne about a fashion shoot that Noel Austin, Eader Photography, and herself had put on. This threesome made a perfect click immediately, complementing the freakish nature of Noel and the brilliant design work of Kristine through the mysterious eyes of Eader Photography. After looking through the images Kristine had sent over, I decided to give the tough biz of Seattle publishing another chance – and to even feature my long time friends from Seattle here for your entertainment. This is a firsthand look at Seattle fashion and art, I hope you enjoy this rare treat here in St. Louis.

Kristine has been a professionally trained Pastry chef (CIA 95) for the past ten years, working as the executive pastry chef at the Seattle Convention Center. But she admits that clothing design has always been pumped through her veins from a young age, and has sewn clothing for a hobby on the side for years. Noel on the other hand is most known as the freak of PURE CirKus, seeing himself as a person who has been misunderstood until he fell ass backwards into the Seattle fashion scene. He laughs while admitting to being a dirty punk-rocker who has traveled the country hustling, doing drugs and putting studs and patches on his jacket. Eader on the other end is self described as someone who is into interesting things that intrigue people, being darkly mysterious, delightfully humors and engagingly unique with his work.

With such a motley crew, something exciting was sure to happen.

Noel got into the fashion scene a few years back. For anyone in the Seattle underground scene, you have seen him enter and leave shows bare-chested in his studded jackets and clothing. At just about every show he’s asked where he bought his punk-style jacket – surprisingly, he made it himself by hand. Through this process he was introduced to fashion producer Ryan Muller of Active Entertainment, and like he said, he fell ass-backwards into the fashion scene. For Kristine it was internet sales of her clothing line that elevated her to the next level, locking her ‘hobby” status in the closet for good.

I asked the duo what separated their fashion form the mainstream hipster garbage found at mass outlets like JC Penny, Target, Hot Topic, etc. Kristine admits to incorporating bits of mainstream fashion into her pieces but still keeping them well away from the normal everyday clothing you would see walking down the street. She wants everyone who wears one of her pieces to feel that it was made just for them and that they will not find another piece just like it anywhere. Noel on the freakish side of the spectrum, says that he brings passion to the table formed by a life lived, designs for the angry, young and feared that scream, “Fuck you! I don’t like you!” He feels that main stream fashion has come up short with its mass produced and watered down looks. “It never fails, there is always some pack of jocks or frat guys who call me a freak or a weirdo. When they don’t realize they are all wearing the same shirt with some light blue jeans and they all look the same with their blonde girl friends. Really, how fucking weird is that shit?” He feels that these people have no identity, that they are clones of a clone, and very weak.

I asked Eader what the shoot was like for him, mostly for my own curiosity. Shooting with Noel, he says was nothing less than freakish, that you never know what to expect with him, but admits that this guy’s got his ball rolling. Kristine, he says, was a sweetheart, easy to work with, and her designs are just brilliant. As for the motorcycle in the shoot at Psycho Cycles, he says you can never go wrong with beautiful choppers and sexy broads.

Noel and Kristine do not have any other fashion shows planned for the upcoming months, but Noel says look for something in about six months. And Kristine is now planning to focus on a portfolio with mass shooting. With that said, she wanted to give a big thank you to Pamela Grieco (www.pamelagrieco. com)! She says that Pam’s fantastic makeup and hair design is a constant inspiration to her, that without her talent her outfits would look only half complete. And of course, a big thank you to all the models and photographers who have supported her in the past. Noel was not short of thanks, but his last words were, “FUCK YOU! LET’S RODEO!” To find more fashion by Noel, he says to go to www.noelaustin.com or to look up d.n.a. Designs through Google. To find more fashions by Kathleen go to www.etsy.com/ shop/hhfashions. And last, but certainly not least, to find more imagery by Eader Photography please go to eaderphotography.com.

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Skin Deep with Stu

Photography by LB Photography (LBfoto1@yahoo.com)

Those of you, who are familiar with my column, mightl be asking yourselves, “Hey! what happened to the Individualized Circumstance part 2?!” It is with sadness and in good hopes that I must run part two in the news section of my website (www.stumodifies.com) as I feel a more pressing matter desires our attention. I will not be writing this article but instead running the blog of a brother and very active member of our community, NoMan Pan... www.nomanpancore.blogspot.com On Thursday, July 15th 2010 embarking on a trip to LA to attend the annual Constructs of Ritual Evolution (CoRE) Powwow, a most unfortunate tragedy occurred. The annual CoRE Powwow symbolizes the tribal brotherhood and sisterhood which make up this beautiful family; the gathering of the three chapters of CoRE with members from Houston, Los Angeles and Oakland/San Francisco.

Members from the Houston Chapter began our two car caravan with four people to each car. Passengers riding in the vehicle at the front were Arwen Rosa, the driver, Brandon Simmons, front passenger, Robby Seeparsad, left back passenger, and Jill Coudray, right back passenger. While on the road in West Texas one of the vehicles had a tire blow out and the driver lost control of the SUV and it spun off the road and rolled six times. Two people, Arwen and Robby, suffered severe injuries and had to be life-flighted to the nearest big hospital which was two hours away by car in Odessa, Texas. The other two passengers, Jill and Brandon were released from the Ft. Stockton Medical Hospital ER that night, but they were still badly bruised and suffer ongoing pain. Jill is five weeks pregnant and everyone was overcome with joy and relief as she was told that her baby was fine and that the fetus was in the stage of development that saved its life, protected and kept safe in the mother’s womb. Her husband, Arwen was one of the seriously injured and was unconscious with contusions to his head and a fractured neck, and he remains in ICU. The second severely injured person, Robby, was thrown from the SUV as it rolled and he landed about thirty feet from where the truck came to rest.

He has two spinal fractures and had internal bleeding due to a lacerated liver and also had one collapsed lung and the other lung was partially collapsed. Robby underwent surgery which involved the removal of his spleen and doctors also sutured and cauterized his liver to stop the internal bleeding; both patients have now shown signs of improvement but doctors say it will be a very long recovery period for both of them. The fourth injured person, Brandon, suffered some trauma to the head and has some chest and shoulder bruising but is not severely injured.

CoRE members who were in the second vehicle which was traveling behind in the caravan were Neil Chakrabati, driver, NoMan Pan, front passenger, Sara Calderon, left back passenger and Vivian Smith, right back passenger.

We were about two car lengths behind the crashed vehicle and we witnessed the entire episode watching in horror and shock as if in some Hollywood movie, overcome with the blood sinking feeling of the overwhelming uncertainty of our friend’s fate.

After the meeting in LA, the people in the crashed vehicle were going to embark on a year long road trip and they had all of their belongings with them that they were taking for their extended travel. The accident took place on one of the remote stretches of Interstate Highway 10 and we were lucky that a man from the closest town of Ft Stockton was driving by and he stopped to provide aid, helping us haul their personal belongings which had to be collected from the side of the road, to a motel. We stowed their belongings while another CoRE member Chris Spears came from Austin in a truck to pick them up and take the belongins to Houston, where he stored them at the house of an Anti Gravity Relaxation Organization (AGRO) brother, Kcir Elohssa.

Neil and Vivian and Jill remained at the hospital and waited for the mothers of Arwen and Robby to arrive and Sara and I remained at the hotel waiting for Brandon’s mother to come and pick him up. Once all was taken care of with regards to people and belongings that were at the hotel, another member of AGRO, Bridgid Burk drove from Houston to pick up Sara and myself to take us back to our homes in Houston.

There are several initiatives that have been launched as a means of providing financial assistance to the victims of this tragic accident for the medical and other ongoing expenses, including the establishing of a PayPal account to which people can make donations. Please contribute to the cause if you are able to and please know that any amount no matter how small is appreciated.

Thanks to everyone who has already contributed to this cause financially and above all thanks to everyone for your love and support to the members of our CoRE Family at this time of crisis in their lives. Keep sending your positive energies! ~NoMan Pan DONATIONS: /www.suspension.org All questions will be answered by email or by a request for you to call me directly and may be in the next issue of the St. Louis Sinner! Thanks for reading!

Stu (Myspace.com/StuModifies - Facbook.com/StuModifies) . Stu@StuModifies.com Self Inflicted Studios (Myspace.com/sistl) 1328 Washington Ave in St. Louis - (314)-621-4660

written by Matthew Gorman

“ I was born with the devil in me. I could not help the fact that I was a murderer, no more than the poet can help the inspiration to sing...I was born with the “Evil One” standing as my sponsor beside the bed where I was ushered into the world, and he has been with me since” – Dr. H.H. Holmes

T

hank GOD, Allah, or the Tooth Fairy one that we don’t hear about “serial killers” more often in our modern-day society than we do. The actual term in America’s history dates back to the year of 1894, when Herman W. Mudgett (aka: Dr. H.H. Holmes), was arrested on a horse swindling charge that he had committed in Texas. He was given the choice of being returned to Texas and sentenced to death by hanging for being a horse thief, or to confess to an insurance fraud scheme that led to the death of his partner, Ben Pietzel, in Philadelphia. Dr. Holmes chose to face the charges in Philadelphia, which eventually uncovered one of America’s most disturbing horror stories.

Herman W. Mudgett was born in 1860 in the town of Gilmanton, New Hampshire. The son of a local postmaster, he was raised in a family that had wealth and a sense of respect from the town’s people.

Years later, he was looked back upon as being an excellent student; even though many remembered him being cruel to animals and younger children. In 1878, at the age of 18, Herman married Clara Lovering, the daughter of a prosperous farmer. Funded by her inheritance, he then began to study medicine at a local college in Burlington Vermont. His studies there lasted until 1879, when he transferred to the University of Michigan.

At the University of Michigan Mudgett began to dabble somewhat in debauchery. By stealing cadavers from the university, he would disfigure the bodies, and then plant them in places and ways that suggested accidental death. Why an accidental death? No better reason than money, right? Mudgett would before-hand take out insurance policies on these “family members” and then later collect the money when their bodies were discovered. After a few months of this, and several thousands of dollars later, Mudgett abandoned his wife and child amongst rumors that the infamous Pinkerton Detectives were on to his scam and narrowing in on his arrest.

Over the next six years several cities became temporary homes to Mudgett; he had swindled communities from St. Paul, Minnesota all the way to New York City. Eventually in 1885, Mudgett turned up in Chicago, where he filed for divorce from his first wife. The case dragged on longer than he expected, so he decided to marry his second wife, Myrtle Belknap, who was also the daughter of a wealthy businessman.

This marriage ended after a few short years when

20

Myrtle’s father, John Belknap, accused Mudgett of trying to poison him after he caught him forging his name on some of his property deeds.

Somewhere in the time frame of 1887, Herman W. Mudgett changed his name to Henry H. Holmes and began working at a local Chicago pharmacy. The pharmacy was owned by Mrs. Dr. Holden, an elderly widow, who was very excited about having a nice young man to take over the responsibilities of her store. Unfortunately for Mrs. Holden, Henry Holmes had other plans for her and her pharmacy. She vanished without a trace shortly after his employment, with authorities never questioning him about his purchase of her pharmacy.

A couple of years later in 1889, Henry Holmes purchased an empty lot across the street from his newly acquired pharmacy and began construction of a hotel. The plan for the hotel was to house the great number of visitors expected to show up for Chicago’s World Fair in 1892. However, the hotel would soon end up being linked to several disappearances later that year.

During the construction of the hotel Holmes hired a jeweler, Ned Connor, to over-see his new jewelry addition to the pharmacy. Shortly after Ned and his family arrived to the windy city, his wife Julia caught the eye of Holmes. He later fired Ned and kept Julia, with their daughter, to take his place. Now with Julia by his side, Holmes concentrated on the hotel’s completion. He acted as his own architect and personally supervised all the crews, which were fired and hired on a regular basis. After three years, Holmes had completed his “castle,” without ever paying for any of the materials.

With the completion of the hotel, Holmes began to advertise lodging for the upcoming World Fair - he also began to run classified ads offering jobs that included room and board to young women in small town papers.

The applicants he selected were then instructed to withdraw all of their money, and to keep the name of his company a secret because he had many devious competitors. Once the new employees arrived, and he was sure that they had no outside ties to the hotel, he would imprison them in his basement. Holmes also tricked other women through the classified ads by looking for a suitable wife. Upon their arrival, he would torture them until he learned of all their wealth, and then they would remain his prisoner until he decided to dispose of them.

While Holmes tortured and murdered dozens of women through the hotel for over four years he was never suspected of any foul play - then he met Minnie Williams, an heir to a Texas real estate fortune. Holmes fell for her quickly and they were soon engaged. This didn’t go over very well with Julia

Connor, who was still involved with Holmes.

Shortly after their engagement, she and her daughter both disappeared.

With Holmes’ marriage to Minnie, he had found his soul mate in death and torture, at least for the time being. The two would soon be linked to several deaths, including another young girl that Holmes desired, Emmeline Cigrand, and her young friend Robert Phelps, who made the mistake of going to the hotel and asking about her whereabouts. Holmes and Minnie were also involved in the death of Minnie’s brother, which was a mining accident. According to Holmes, Minnie also killed her sister after a heated argument about him, and they later disposed of her body in Lake Michigan.

After their return to Chicago, Georgianna Yoke showed up at the hotel looking for employment; for unknown reasons, Holmes and Minnie pretended to be cousins. With no reason to doubt their story, she found herself married to Holmes on January 17th, 1894, in Denver, Colorado. The three then traveled to Texas, claimed Minnies’ property, and arranged a huge horse swindle. After making a fortune off the horses, the three returned to the hotel in Chicago. This was the last time Minnie was ever seen alive.

Holmes told authorities that Minnie had killed her sister and took off to Europe; with no reason to suspect him, they let him go. A few months later, in July of 1894, Holmes was arrested for the horse theft in Texas. Georgianna bailed him out, but while in jail he met a convict by the name of Marion Hedgepeth.

Hedgepeth then introduced Holmes to a crooked lawyer, Jeptha Howe, who later helped him fake his own death. Unfortunately for the three, the $20,000 policy was never paid by the company because they suspected fraud.

Now a free man again, Holmes returned to Chicago and contacted his partner in previous schemes, Ben Pietzel, to help him with another faked death. Holmes never mentioned to Pietzel that it would be his body used in the scheme. After poisoning Pietzel and burning his face, Holmes planted the body as planned and later had Howe claim the insurance money. This time the scheme paid off without any suspicion, but Holmes forgot to pay Marion Hedgpeth his small cut. He later turned Holmes in to the St. Louis

police.

Now caught in a mess, Holmes contacted Pietzel’s wife and instructed her to come with him and Georgianna to meet her husband in Detroit.

Unknowingly, she did as she was asked by Holmes, even letting him put her two children in a boarding house for her. Now with the Pinkerton Detectives hot on his trail, Holmes bounced across the country, but after two short months his luck ran out. On November 17th, 1894, Pinkerton Detective Frank Geyer arrested Dr. H. H. Holmes in Philadelphia, PA. As Detective Geyer started digging into the life of Holmes while building a case against him, the seasoned detective was unprepared for what lay ahead. After finding clues that led to Pietzel’s children, Geyer found the children buried in the back yard of a house that Holmes had rented. They also found a trunk he’d used to trick the children into hiding in during a game of hide-n-seek, where he used a hidden hose to pump toxic gas into the trunk. He later borrowed a shovel from the next door neighbor and buried them.

Now with a search warrant for Holmes’ hotel, the group of detectives would spend weeks trying to make a floor plan out of the unusual layout. On the second floor, detectives found 35 rooms, many with no windows and air-tight walls that Holmes used to asphyxiate his victims; other rooms had hidden trap doors where he could sneak in without waking his victim. In the basement, detectives found his “chamber of horrors.” This is where they discovered his dissecting table, a laboratory of torture devices, various jars of poisons, and a box filled with several female skeletons.

Detectives also found a crematory installed in one of the walls with bags of lime and vials of acid lying near it for disintegrating bodies. These discoveries quickly gave Holmes’ hotel the name “murder castle,” which burned to the ground without ever being solved.

Henry Mudgett, aka: Dr. H. H. Holmes, was found guilty on Nov. 30th, 1894. He was sentenced to death by hanging at 10:25 am on May 7,1896. Ghost stories still haunt Chicago where the old hotel once sat, even though a post office now sits there in its place. There are stories that Holmes still takes bodies in his afterlife, and many residents of the area complain that their animals are often spooked when passing the post office. Whether any of those claims are true, I don’t know, but the brutality Holmes inflicted upon his many victims makes for one hell-of a campfire tale.

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On Practicing

By Jason Sibert

“IS LOVE AN ART?” psychologist Erich Fromm asks in the beginning of his book The Art of Loving. After the big question, Fromm states that if one defines love as an art they become aware that “it requires knowledge and effort.” In the same paragraph he states that most of us prefer to see love as a mystical experience, something “we fall into.” He spends the rest of the book expounding on the knowledge and effort required of the practitioners of “the art of love” while also saying most of society prefers the mystical experience.

In the early pages, Fromm expounds on the alienation of the human situation and explains how this alienation leads to romantic yearnings – humans’ ability to reason makes us unique in the world and we use our reason to create a new harmony, a human type of harmony that differs from the harmony of the animal kingdom who know nothing of their separation from nature. In other words, we have a need to reach out to the rest of society and form a community because it allows us to work together to solve the problems individuals can’t solve.

Modern society allows a considerable amount of freedom in the realm of love.

For centuries marriages were arranged and love was suppose to develop after a couple married. In the last few centuries ideas about romantic love have dominated the Western world.

The concept of romantic love emerged in late 18th and early 19th century from an artistic, literary and intellectual movement called Romanticism. The movement emphasized emotions such as feeling, intuition and imagination over reason and its primary impact on Western culture is the idea that romantic love should be a prelude to marriage.

Falling in love involves developing feelings of togetherness with the object of our love. The whole experience usually leads to disappointment when the magic of falling in love disappears. Fromm says our romantic conceptions of love do not make one a master of “the art of loving.” A master of any art is a “master of theory and practice.” One might theoretically know their chosen art, but constant practice creates the master. Practicing the art of love allows us to create

wonders not created alone, but the “art of love” often clashes with the romantic definition.

In an earlier essay for this magazine titled Annette I expounded on my love for my best friend Annette, a love which at this writing is still experienced by me and not her. What have I gained from this relationship if my dreams of her loving me back have not been fulfilled? I’ve realized that I’m a practitioner of “the art of love.” Fromm states that the act of love is an act of “giving and not receiving.” For more than a year I’ve supported her through a tough time in her life and as I feel that toughness receding, I can say my friendship with her has made a difference.

Even though I’m approaching middle-age and haven’t found the person I want to spend my life with, I can honestly say my relationships have made a difference. Over two years ago I started a relationship with a law student in her final year of school and she says my friendship helped her achieve her goal of becoming a lawyer.

As a friend and boyfriend I’ve helped women face and defeat challenges like breakups, divorces, family conflict, loss of self-esteem and just about any other problem one can face. Although some might say I’m unlucky in the game of love because I haven’t found that special person, I can honestly say they are incorrect because I can see the results of my love in the support I’ve given others in the tough game of life.

I’ve created a community, a community of positive, success stories, and those narratives have brought me happiness on a certain level - they’re so much more productive than those destructive love stories that end in tragedy of every form: divorce, hatred, mental torture, and even crime.

Maybe I’ll die alone and not be remembered for one essay, short story or piece of journalism that I published, but I’ll face eternity knowing I tried, using the “art of love,” to make other’s lives more bearable in a tough and unforgiving world.

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THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS OF...

Deanna Deadly Deanna Deadly is a Model based in Chicago but you can find her traveling often. She has been shooting Fetish, Alternative, Horror, Pin-Up and Art Nude for the last three years professionally. Her turn-ons are latex, highheels over 6 inches, gloves, almost anything purple, people who are as much of a music junkie as her and anyone who is as passionate about life and acheiving there dreams as her. Her turn-offs are Selfish and Unreliable People, PVC clothing and really crappy horror movie remakes.

And now, Deanna Deadly confesses her Seven Deadly sins for your reading pleasure...

GREED

I am greedy when it comes to hoarding my high-heel and latex collection, and who doesnt always want more money or more of anything they love?

Forrest Blvd Kingshighway

WRATH

Wrath is Something Im very guilty of.

I always want to revenge myself and make people pay when they have done me wrong or someone I am close to.

SLOTH

Sometimes I just want to lay in bed all day with my cat. I am a big procastinator, as much as I get stuff done I also have a lot waiting on my list of things to do and it never seems to end.

GLUTTONY

Gluttony is not a big one for me.

I wouldnt have this body If I overendulged on food ;)

ENVY

I am envious of a lot of people but I try to focus on myself more than anything or anyone else because Envy will get you nowhere in life!

PRIDE

I am very guilty of Pride. Im a Leo after all ;) Pride is probably the most acceptable sin because I think its a very good thing to have. You have to take pride in what you do and how you look even If you might not think your perfect.

LUST

Would I be human if I wasnt guilty of lust? I lust over many material things and many humans as well ;) You can find more of Deanna Deadly at www.facebook.com/modeldeannadeadly and www.deannadeadly.com

★

t u l S k The

As

Do American Men Want to be Dominated?

Dear Slut, I have a sex culture question: Do most American men have the dream of being taken advantage of?

Does it have anything to do with geography, i.e., would it apply to men in New York, for instance? Just curious.

– Russian Goddess Dear Russian Goddess, Since I’ve only had sex with about half the U.S. population as opposed to all, I’m not sure if I can accurately answer this one, but I’ll try. Also, feedback from male readers would be appreciated.

I’ve found that pretty much men dream of whatever they aren’t getting. So if they have to be the boss at work, they like to be bossed in the bedroom. If they aren’t getting laid, they want to get laid, preferably by more than one woman at once. If their partner is an older woman, they fantasize about being with someone younger. If their best friend has a hot mom and they aren’t fucking her, they would very much like for her to seduce them when they unexpectedly walk in on her sunbathing nude by the pool. In other words, most men want it all. Which, I have to admit, I can relate to.

People tend to lean in one direction (dom or sub) though some people can assume both roles, given the mood. But not always! One time I saw a dom guy, very aggressive in the bedroom, get blindfolded and tied to a pool table so five (FIVE!) beautiful women could ravage him, and you could tell he didn’t like it one bit. But I suppose a lot of men could get into that, ey?

And though I haven’t been to New York yet but desperately need to get there so I can experience the wealth of vegetarian restaurants, I’m pretty confident that the number of men who want a woman to sit on their face is even higher than here in the midwest, since everyone in New York is a total freak.

Are Exposed Breasts Less Exciting?

Dear Slut, I am aware that people from other countries ridicule us Americans for being too prudish and making, for instance, the Super Bowl nipple incident into big news. Doesn’t the taboo that we associate with titillation increase the excitement that we experience with all things sexual (and especially kinky sex)?

I know that I am sincerely excited when my lady friend wears a low-cut blouse and bends over to climb into our tent–wouldn’t that excitement be diminished if women were topless all the time? I am thinking of the European concept of the exposed breast as being less taboo than it is in America– doesn’t that mean that their excitement at a downblouse moment is lessened?

I’m also curious to know how aware women are of exposing their breasts while wearing low-cut blouses. Are they TRYING to drive us crazy, or are they simply dressing for the warm weather and giving us a show by happy coincidence?

– Breast Watcher Dear Breast Watcher, I don’t think seeing breasts more often decreases the thrill one gets when seeing a woman in a low-cut blouse. If anything, it makes the moment a happier, healthier experience. But you might want to test this out yourself.

Since I happen to know that you’re a footloose and fancy professor off for the summer, I suggest you spend a week at a European beach surrounded by well-oiled topless people of all genders, shapes, and sizes.

Then, hang out at an outdoor cafe where beautiful women in tank tops sip wine and laugh and let their straps slip off their golden shoulders and see if your erotic senses have been dulled.

Or alternatively, I can come stay at your house for a week topless and see if you get bored with boobs (I’ll need internet access.)

OR we can go to Europe together and combine the options. I doubt you’ll be yawning, especially as we check out the hot chicks together.

(Oh, and yes women know they’re driving you crazy when they show off flesh or go braless, but chances are, they care more about their comfort than your sanity.)

Got a sex, relationship, BDSM or fetish related question? The Beautiful Kind is a sexpert with over 20 years experience and is happy for you to learn from her mistakes while soaking up her hard earned wisdom. Email your kinky queries to love@thebeautifulkind.com. www.thebeautifulkind.com paint by Plastic

photo by Cyanide Studios©

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