Evening of Remembrance
Seasons of Love and Loss June 2020
Welcome We hope the following selection of poems and readings give you comfort and peace.
Surviving in the Sea of Grief by G Snow (an extract)
As for grief, you’ll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you’re drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it’s some physical thing. Maybe it’s a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it’s a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.
In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you’ll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what’s going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a place, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything…and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life. Somewhere down the line, and it’s different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or a family occasion, You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you’ll come out. Take it from one who knows the waves never stop coming, and somehow you don’t really want them to. But you learn that you’ll survive them. And other waves will come. And you’ll survive them too.
Feelings by Sandra Woolridge No more your face to look upon Or your beautiful smile to see Though deep inside my heart I know You still reside with me. When the sun casts down its golden rays That’s when I see your smile Then raindrops fall just like my tears And my heart aches for a while A rainbow in the sky appears With a beauty of it’s own And on the breeze I hear your voice It whispers, you’re not alone.
Beyond the Rainbow There is a Place by KP Lynne Beyond the rainbow there is a place Where peace and love is nigh A place where music fills the air Where sunshine fills the sky. Beyond the rainbow there is a place Where there is no black or white A place where everyone gets along Where there is no hatred in sight. Beyond the rainbow there is a place Where pain and sadness disappears A place where life defeats death Where there are no earthly fears. Beyond the rainbow there is a place Where every wish comes true A place where you find loved ones Where they patiently waited for you. Beyond the rainbow there is a place Where there is no sorrow or strife A Place where love is always near Where there is everlasting life.
Song of Hope Written by Helen Summers, performed by Elizabeth and Andy Summers May every step that you take find a place that is strong and safe. May every hill you climb fall away; may every dark night find a new day. May every sight that you see give you a glimpse of the joys that will be. May you believe that whatever you need, you’ll find your way.  When loss and fear fall like rain, may love and warmth find the rainbow again. May every tear and sigh disappear; may there be music in all that you hear. May there be hands you can hold; may there be hope as your journey unfolds. May you receive all the strength that you need to walk your way.
Look For Me in Rainbows by Vicki Brown
Time for me to go now, I won't say goodbye; Look for me in rainbows, way up in the sky. In the morning sunrise when all the world is new, Just look for me and love me, as you know I loved you. Time for me to leave you, I won't say goodbye; Look for me in rainbows, high up in the sky. In the evening sunset, when all the world is through, Just look for me and love me, and I'll be close to you. Â Time for us to part now, we won't say goodbye; Look for me in rainbows, shining in the sky. Â Every waking moment, and all your whole life through Just look for me and love me, as you know I loved you. Just wish me to be near you, And I'll be there with you.
Blessing from Aberjhani  Fill your soul with the beauty of the rainbow and no matter where you go, in this world or the next, love will find you, attend you and bless you.
Service of Remembrance  Opening Prayer God our refuge and strength, close at hand in our times of confusion and distress, meet us in our sorrow and uncertainty and lift our eyes to the peace and light of your constant care. Help us to hear your word of grace that our fear will be dispelled by your love, our loneliness eased by your presence and our hope renewed by your promises in Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Bible reading — John 14:1-6,27 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going.” Thomas said to him, “Lord, we don’t know where you are going, so how can we know the way?” Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”
Homily When we lose someone we love it is very difficult to come to terms with, whether it is expected or sudden, it is always a shock and leaves us with a void and great pain. Add in the situation we have all been living through over the past weeks and it can’t help but make us consider our own mortality too. But I think the passage we have just heard gives us hope and encouragement to go on, encouragement to go on knowing that those we have loved and lost are with God and that there is a place for each one of us with God. However different and individual each one of us may be, and we are all so very different, there is a specific place in God’s eternal love for each one of us. on earth. God’s house is never full, we don’t need to make a booking. God has already reserved our place with Him so that now, with His help, we can try to move on for the rest of our time here on earth.
In that passage we also hear from Thomas, the disciple who always said what everyone thought but was afraid to say. He was honest and expressed his doubts and confusion. In this time when we all have so many questions, doubts and uncertainties I think it is reassuring to know that even the disciples, the ones closest to Jesus during his life on earth, had doubts and uncertainties themselves, things they did not understand. By the time this passage was written the disciples would have been with Jesus for close to three years, with Him every day, listening to Him teach, and yet there were still things they did not understand and were confused about. If they had things they did not understand or were confused about, I think it is quite reasonable that we too should have similar problems, especially at difficult times like this. If they had things they did not understand or were confused about, I think it is quite reasonable that we too should have similar problems, especially at difficult times like this. But I believe that the overall message of this passage, along with the hope and encouragement we find there, is that God is with us, through the Holy Spirit, not only now but always.
As John tell us earlier in his Gospel, chapter 3 verse 16. God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him may not perish but have eternal life. We can believe that for those we have loved and lost, for now, and also for ourselves. Amen.
Prayers God our Father, we thank you that you have made each of us in your own image, and given us gifts and talents to serve you. We thank you for those we have cared for and have lost, the time shared with them, the love received from them. Lord now give us strength and courage to leave them in your care confident in your promise of eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. Â We thank you Lord for the skill, the sympathy and the resilience of all who care for the sick, strengthen them with your spirit that in the love and care they give they will know that you are with them. Â In a few moments of quiet we bring our own prayers to the Lord. (Short silence)
The Lord’s Prayer Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name. They kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give s this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses. As we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, For Thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory, for ever and ever. Amen.
Words of comfort Hear what comfortable words our Saviour Christ says to all that truly turn to Him: “Come unto me all that are heavy laden, and I will refresh you.” Matt 11:28 Hear what St Paul says. “I am convinced that neither death, not life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Jesus Christ our Lord.” Romans 8:38,39.
Blessing Christ the good shepherd enfold you in his love, fill you with his peace and lead you in hope; and the blessing of God Almighty, Father Son and Holy spirit be among you and remain with you always. Amen.
St Luke's Hospice Bereavement Support Tel: 01606 551246 E-mail: fsc@slhospice.co.uk The Evening of Remembrance and Service of Remembrance June 2020 is produced by the Family Support & Counselling and Spiritual Care and Chaplaincy Teams. Thank you to all. Special thanks to Andy and Elizabeth Summers for their invaluable help and contributions in making of this month’s Evening of Remembrance. Feedback or suggestions for future Evenings of Remembrance are very welcome.