my fear of death ten years later BELLA AGARWAL DESERT MOUNTAIN HIGH SCHOOL age 5, child. afraid of the dark, afraid of what creatures lurk in the damp air. in the midst of the night, hurricane spills in through cracked windows, rain clouds are ebony skid marks on the sky. beady eyes narrow in on me, i become a silvery fish swimming in ink, reckless pawn on the chess board. even the marrow in my bones can see Death in this air, She is made of embers and sunken cheeks, a hollow face but ever-hungry stomach. Her scythe guts me, cherry pits spill from my gaping wound, my fish skeleton on full display, an ashy willow tree with bones for branches, gnarled and twisted. i am all puckered lips and gills, my scales become scattered on the floor, fishhook falling out of my mouth, i was naive enough to take the bait and enter the darkness. i am dead-alive like i was in my mother’s womb, it brings back memories i do not have. i see Her face, Death with tight skin and pearly teeth, Her metal corset and swirling skirts ablaze. with a blow She sends me back to where i came from and i cower underneath my mattress, i become the monster under my bed.
04
st. louis youth arts journal
