By: P. Siddharth
----- DISCLAIMER ----Names, characters, places, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events of locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Published in India in 2019 by NOLEGEIN A-118, 1st Floor, Sector 63, Noida, U.P., 201301 NOLEGEIN is an imprint of Consortium e-Learning Network Private Limited All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reprinted or reproduced or utilized in any from or by any electronic, mechanical, or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system without permission in writing from the publisher. ISBN: 978-93-87376-79-3
Copyright Š 2019 All Rights Reserved
----- Dedication ----To the Universe, for having inspired me to write this book. To Mom and Dad for everything. To all my readers, for your support and encouragement.
----- Acknowledgment ----To acknowledge some and not others, would not be proper, since everyone I have met in life’s journey has taught me something. I would like to thank my parents, sisters, extended family, friends, colleagues, and everyone else who has contributed to shaping me as a person. This book wouldn’t have been possible without living the life I’ve lived, so a big ‘Thank You’ to the phenomenon of life. Special thanks to my sister, Swati, for relentlessly helping me edit and revise the book to bring it to its current shape. Without her support, this book would still be lying in my drawer, unpublished.
---- About the Author ----P. Siddharth, an engineer by profession, presents an interesting perspective on the well-known issue of immigration in the United States of America. Having lived in India and North America, the author has faced the H1B visa conundrum and the struggle for a Green Card. Experiences shared by friends, family, and others in the same situation have led to the writing of this book.
----- Preface ----Have you ever wanted something so much that nothing else around you mattered anymore? Have you ever wanted to be somewhere, be someone, to be with a person, or have something that gives you a sense of purpose – the feeling that you are still alive and kicking in the race of life? We all have. And Aseem was no different. For the longest part of his life, Aseem kept chasing a dream – a dream he thought was his destiny, his aspiration, his life. While doing so, he forgot something very important – everything happens in due time. And time takes time. Did Aseem find his dream or did he, like us, give up on it to find a new pursuit? Find out in this story of struggle, friendship, love, and deceit.
----- Contents ----1. Where it all Began .............................................................01 2. Blast from the Past ............................................................15 3. Step Ahead ........................................................................27 4. Shock and Awe ..................................................................39 5. The D Factor .....................................................................55 6. All that Glitters .................................................................61 7. The Bubble Bursts ............................................................69 8. The Forbidden Fruit ..........................................................83 9. The Insider Job ...............................................................95 10. The Inevitable Insolvency ........................................................105 11. The Hapless Brother.....................................................113 12. The Week-long Wedding .....................................................123
13. Staying Alive ................................................................137 14. The Sacred Diary ..........................................................149 15. Born Again ....................................................................161 16. Walls have Ears .............................................................173 17. The Forgotten Chapter ................................................183 18. The Book Unfolds .........................................................193
GREEN CARD: Chasing the American Dream
1 Where it all Began November 2008 – Los Angeles, CA, USA “I’m afraid you might have to serve time in jail and may even be deported for breaking the laws of this country,” said the law enforcement officer hovering over Aseem. His piercing voice echoed in the cell-like secondary inspection room inside of the Los Angeles International Airport. The room was tense and the depressing ambience was heightened by the abysmal state it was in, which stood in stark contrast to the otherwise spacious and modern airport. Cramped and dimly lit, with a low ceiling, it felt like a dilapidated office, not part of one of the largest airports in the world. There were five counters, where officers called people for questioning. Behind that was a work area with tables and chairs. There were some rooms behind the counters as well, most likely used for longer interrogations. Unlike the aesthetically designed airport, this area was painted in dull, tobacco-stain yellow, with plain furniture and no decorations. Sitting there, Aseem reimagined the weather outside where he was unloading his bags from the plane, just a few hours ago. Through the minuscule windows, he had noticed the rumbling ash gray clouds and the bolt of lightning taking over the outdoors. They had made the typically sunny California sky look ominous. It was as if the grim setting was warning him of something dreadful that was destined to happen. And here he was. 1
Where it all Began He uncomfortably sat on a small chair, his hands gripped each other squeezing hard, and thumbs twiddling. Dressed in casual blue jeans and a cotton tee with a button-down suede field jacket, he was of a lean frame, with an olive complexion, upturned chestnut-brown restless eyes, and sharp, angular features. His shoulders seemed droopy when he walked, and his thin, silky hair hid part of his broad forehead, no matter how many times he flicked them back. An engineer, coming from a lower middle-class family back in India, he had worked his socks off most of his adult life to elevate his social and financial status. Since childhood, he had always been the serious one, partly because he was the eldest among his siblings. He always had a sense of ambition and responsibility, which came through in his studies as he worked his way meticulously through school and eventually college and university. He did not have many friends but Sid had stuck around with him the longest. The two were inseparable since the first semester in college and ended up as roommates too. Aseem did not have a large social circle, but he was extremely loyal to the limited group that was there. His ambition and hard work had paved his way to the United States, where he wanted to build his life, just like he had always dreamed. However, the journey so far had been more like a nightmare than a dream; he was beginning to doubt if he’ll be able to make it. It felt a lot more like a nightmare he had no chance of waking up from. “Are you listening to me? I’m talking to you. I said, you might have to serve prison time and then get deported to your home country. What do you have to say in your defense?” the officer seemed annoyed at Aseem’s nonchalance. The mention of prison jolted Aseem back into his senses. He looked up at the officer in shock, unable to digest the 2
GREEN CARD: Chasing the American Dream words hurled at him. He took a moment to gather his thoughts and understand the situation before he spoke. “Sir, I have never indulged in any illegal activity,” Aseem helplessly reiterated the same sentence he had been stating while being interrogated for the past few hours. “Are you teaching me the law? You don’t know the law and in case you haven’t realized, I am the law enforcement officer here,” said the infuriated law officer with his arms crossed. Hours of grueling interrogation had drained Aseem after a long, tiresome flight. What was happening to him? Where did he go wrong? What did he miss out? A hundred thoughts crowded his mind. He was looking for answers but in vain. The law enforcement officers interrogating him were not in the mood to cooperate. Aseem had always been a diligent, law-abiding citizen, and a man of principles. Doing something illegal was out of the question. However, this was something only his folks back home, or his close friends could have testified for. They were the only people who knew him that well, unlike the officers he was facing at the moment. But he was a long distance away from home – far away from his people. He had chased his dreams to a place that was strange to him – a place where he would always be the outsider. The time, eleven minutes after eleven in the morning had planted itself in his head permanently. It signified the moment that changed everything in his life. His scrawny black digital watch had displayed 11:11 when he was woken up by the gentleman sitting next to him in the airplane. His first reaction was to look at the watch and then he instinctively ran his fingers through his disheveled hair. His exhausted mind drifted back to the peaceful flight he had, all the way from India to the U.S. – the land of dreams. 3
Where it all Began During the flight, Aseem recalled staring at the puffy white clouds, enjoying the serenity of that moment. He sat on the middle seat, with an elderly gentleman on the aisle seat and a little girl at the window. He had lurched toward the window, taking pictures of the scenery from up above, startling the girl. “Excuse me, Mister, do you want to sit at the window for some time?” she asked. “Oh, so kind of you, but that’s ok, just took some pictures. Won’t disturb you again,” Aseem responded. He felt cramped in the middle seat but did not want to uproot the girl from her treasured window seat. “You know, your eyes are the most unique shade of brown I’ve ever seen,” the girl added. “Really? Thanks a lot for the compliment. You also have the most amazing green eyes!” He smiled and stretched his tall, lean frame before reclining into his seat to get some shut-eye. At that time, which wasn’t too long ago, Aseem could never have envisioned the nightmarish situation that awaited him at the airport. This unusual turn of events was extremely daunting for him. He had never been in an interrogation room before, but he had heard horror stories about it. It all began when the officer at the immigration desk for international arrivals directed him to secondary inspection. He knew he would be interrogated. But for what? He did not know. The unfolding events had allowed the anxiety to seep in and Aseem wasn’t sure how to handle it. A loud thud broke into the silence that surrounded Aseem in the dingy interrogation room. He was disgusted by the crude demeanor of the officers interrogating him. They had just placed a big file on the table. “Speak up! We need to get down to business,” the intimidating officer ordered. 4
GREEN CARD: Chasing the American Dream “Sir, I’ve already informed you…” Aseem began before he was cut short. “Shut up!” the officer ordered once again. This man was despicable, quite unlike the elderly gentleman who sat next to Aseem in the flight. He had been polite enough to wake him up when their flight landed, softly nudging Aseem to pull him out of his slumber. That’s how Americans usually are – respectful, courteous – but his interrogator seemed like a completely different breed. Aseem quietly observed the two men in front of him. They appeared to be deep in discussion over something, while they kept flipping through a file of paperwork Aseem had no clue about. The other officer remained predominantly dormant, but something told him it was better that way. “Let’s start again,” the officer was back and this time he sat down at the table across from Aseem. Aseem dreaded what was about to follow. He had already been there for hours and was not sure whether he could survive yet another series of the same questions. He had already answered them twice before this. However, he had no choice, so he simply nodded. “So, how long have you been in the United States?” asked the officer. “I have been here since 1999,” Aseem calmly responded. Doesn’t he know? He has been studying my records for Godknows-how-many-hours now– Aseem was getting frustrated yet maintained a stoic facade. He still didn’t know what he did wrong and that just added to his misery. “Hmm, that’s a long time. So, you must have applied for a Green Card?” The officer mentioned matter-of-factly. 5
Where it all Began The Green Card – this was the first time the officer mentioned it all this time. The question didn’t surprise Aseem though. It was normally the first question the authorities asked in matters related to immigration. “Yes Sir, I’ve applied for the Green…” replied Aseem “Who is your Green Card sponsor?” the officer interrupted Aseem impatiently. “JK Investments,” replied Aseem. The other officer was typing away everything Aseem said– apparently recording his statement. The clacking of keys on the keyboard was the only sound that broke the ghostly silence filling the room now. Aseem felt his heart would burst out of his chest any moment now and wondered if his heartbeats were loud enough for the officers to hear it. “Sir, come on over,” the officer led Aseem outside to one of the immigration counters. “Hand me everything you have in your possession.” Startled, Aseem stared at the man who had ruined his day for way too long now. The relentless officer seemed to have understood his predicament yet continued to persist. “The file you have in your hand, kindly place it on the table. Also turn your pockets inside out for me, hand over your cell phone and wallet to me. Remove the jacket and put it on the counter along with everything else you have in your possession at the moment.” In Aseem’s numerous visits in and out of the country, he had never been subject to such harassment. Scared and vulnerable, he felt like a criminal who had no clue what his crime was. He was too stunned to ask the authorities about it. Grudgingly, he complied with the order, removing his jacket, emptying his pockets, and taking his wallet out of the back pocket of his jeans. 6
GREEN CARD: Chasing the American Dream A chill crawled up his spine as he stood there wearing a thin T-shirt. Leaning against the counter, he suddenly halted while reaching for the jacket. “Please keep your hands away from the counter, Sir,” a rebuke came immediately from the increasingly annoying officer. As the officer continued examining his belongings, Aseem crossed his hands over his chest to stay warm and remained wary of leaning on the counter again. He was hungry and thirsty from the long flight followed by this hours-long ordeal. He felt as if he would faint. His parched throat made him break into a bout of cough. The officer guiding him behind the counter gently inquired, “Are you okay? Do you need some water?” It was the first time he heard a kind word from the man who had been interrogating him, putting him through this torture. “Thank you, Sir, some water would be great,” replied Aseem. Sipping water from the tiny paper cup, Aseem wondered how much longer he would have to hold on to his patience in this oppressive environment. He had noticed the claustrophobic nature of the place the moment he entered it hours ago. The damp stench in that basement-like area made him nauseous. It seemed like several minutes passed as he stood there, lost in thought. The moment he began wondering why they were taking so long, the loathsome officer crept near. He motioned Aseem to sit down on a thin bench and then sat down next to him, with his eyes positioned on the tip of his shoes. He adjusted his uniform before he went on and explained the situation, informing Aseem that he might be facing possible deportation and prison time. Aseem was not sure whether he was hearing right. He felt like he was in some kind of a soap opera or movie. A myriad of negativities filled his mind as the officer’s words echoed in his 7
Where it all Began ears. These were the words that Aseem had only heard uttered for criminals. Throughout his life, he could not fathom coming close to experiencing it himself. Before taking this ill-fated flight, he could never ever have imagined the shame, the agony, or the pain he was experiencing. He recalled enjoying himself in the festivities back home, the happy faces of his family, and then suddenly, the officer’s words struck him like a bolt of lightning. His thoughts raced from one peak of pessimism to another as his heart sank under the power and authority of this fearsome man. Aseem’s entire future was now in the officer’s hands. From his perspective on the current situation, a bleak future awaited him, one where he’ll never have a decent job. He feared that he would be scorned and ostracized by everyone. Now he expected to eventually fail in his own eyes, the career he longed for and had come so far for, would simply cease to exist. There would be nothing left to live for. The only option left would be to commit suicide. What is the sure way of dying at your own will? Aseem pondered. What if I don’t die? What if someone finds me alive after I try to commit suicide? It will then be a crime as well. Oh, can’t a person even die in peace if the world won’t let him live? Tears flooded his eyes as these thoughts clouded his mind. “Do you have anything that proves you are legal?” The officer’s question brought Aseem back from his trance. “Sir, I have the offer letter from my employer and my pay stubs for the last three months. Also, my current H1B visa is stamped on my passport for the duration of its validity. I gave you all my documents including my I-797C, the notice of action for my H1B transfer.” Aseem explained. “That’s not legal evidence, we need something from the 8
GREEN CARD: Chasing the American Dream immigration services showing that you have maintained your legal status throughout your stay here,” the sturdy officer’s stance was firm. “I am not carrying all my H1B approvals with me, but I can send them to you when I get back to my apartment,” Aseem pleaded, hoping they just let him go. “That’s my dilemma. I can’t let you go before I am convinced you haven’t played the immigration system,” the officer was unflinching. Aseem was in a fix. The officer disappeared again for what seemed like ages. The door creaked open and the officer summoned Aseem to a station with a monitor and stationed himself beside the man checking something on the computer. They both seemed deeply invested in what they were looking at. After the clacking sound of the keyboard came to a pause, their expression seemed to indicate satisfaction with the research. Sensing that they might actually detain or deport him, Aseem leaned in to inquire the current situation. “Sir, can I please speak with my attorney?” Aseem asked, knowing they were currently his only source of information. “As of now you don’t have any rights and anything you say can be used as evidence against you,” the officer’s voice was unmistakably harsh. “If you admit guilt, we can deport you without trial.” “But Sir, I haven’t done anything wrong,” Aseem protested. The mention of prison earlier had made Aseem cringe like he never had before in his life. The mere thought of prison had made him sick to the core. It made him worry about the reaction of his parents, his friends, and co-workers. His head began to spin and his knees went numb. Hot iron pumped through his veins as he struggled to sustain an upright position. In the known history of his family, they had 9
Where it all Began never even visited a police station so a stint at the prison was unthinkable for them. Aseem, the obedient Indian guy, who had never gotten a single speeding ticket, now faced the prospect of being a prison inmate in a foreign country. He imagined being dressed in a typical prison uniform – orange coveralls. He imagined living in a cramped cell with murderers, thieves, and rapists. The gruesome cells where he would spend the rest of his life with a criminal on a shared bunk bed. The horrendous list of possibilities raced across his head. This unsanctioned and unfair sentence would surely devastate his parents. Their impeccable reputation would be tarnished beyond repair, and his youngest sister’s future would be ruined. Who would marry her after knowing her brother’s criminal past? I haven’t done anything good for my family, please don’t make me the harbinger of their sorrow. O God, what did I do to deserve this? Aseem sobbed quietly. Although he was not particularly religious, he started reciting under his breath, the Hanuman Chalisa, a 40-verse prayer devoted to Lord Hanuman. In times of hardships, most Hindus would call upon Lord Hanuman, the Monkey God, and remover of obstacles. As the daunting officer stood watch, Aseem could see his whole life flash before his eyes. He began regretting the moment he had set foot on foreign soil. Soon, his mind wandered back to the day that led him up to this point. His thoughts raced back to 1993, the year that became a precursor to his present life. On a sun-drenched morning in June of 1993, newspapers had suddenly become scarce. There was supposed to be an announcement of candidates that were accepted in the U.P. State Engineering Entrance exams. Aseem’s family had never waited for a newspaper hawker’s arrival as eagerly as they had that day. With a thump, the paper was dropped in their foyer and 10
GREEN CARD: Chasing the American Dream Aseem almost collided with his little sister in the race to get to it. He snatched the paper but handed it over to his sister Meenu after seeing her sullen face. She began jumping with joy, her pigtails flailing on the side. She hugged her brother and looked up at him with a smile stretched as wide as possible, her eyes twinkling. “Hey Meenu,” Aseem said with a smirk, “Can you please stop jumping now and see if my roll number is in the selected list. I don’t want to jinx it.” Meenu was four years younger than Aseem and the apple of his eye. A gawky 13-year-old with pimples that had only recently started breaking out on her face. Her thick-rimmed glasses made her look wiser beyond her age. “Okay, Bhaiya, let me be your lucky charm,” she addressed her elder brother, adjusting her glasses and beaming with her pearly whites. Meenu scanned the paper in haste at first and then carefully ran her index finger through each number slowly searching for Aseem’s roll number. As he observed the transition in her behavior with her eagerness withered away and her face betraying a concern, his heart skipped a beat and a very familiar knot formed in his gut. “What happened, am I not there?” disappointment was apparent in his cracking voice. “No, Bhaiya, it is … a huge list … let me check it carefully,” her voice quivered as she seemed to make an excuse. Aseem grabbed the paper from her and went through the list himself. As he had suspected by the look on Meenu’s face, he was not selected for UP State Engineering. Despite his usual pessimism, he was confident on passing the entrance exams. He scanned through the paper for the roll numbers of his close friends and saw that one of them had been selected. In a stupor, 11
Where it all Began Aseem rushed to his room and slammed the door before flinging himself over the bed. He pondered on what might have gone wrong with his exam. He had always aspired on being an engineer. He had worked diligently for it, even defying his father’s expectations to follow his dream. He couldn’t help but think about the sweat and toil that was wasted in the preparation of those exams. Since childhood, he had an inquisitive attitude and was always a step ahead from the class in regards to numbers. He remembered the scene at the sports stadium two years back, when he was the star of the day. It was the school sports day as well as award ceremony for the toppers of class tenth board exams. Aseem had received three gold medals that day for achieving the highest marks in physics, chemistry, and math. As he received the medals from the principal, that queasy yet amazing feeling of accomplishment, as well as making his parents proud, was overwhelming. His heartbeat was almost twice its normal rhythm and he felt on top of the world. He was filled with ambition after achieving his goal to score the highest marks in school. He was hopeful for the future, surmounted with joy and eagerness to face the next challenge. Little did the naïve child know that the world was not like his school or even his hometown. Aseem had then prepared for engineering entrance exams along with his class 11th and 12th curriculum. He was under tremendous pressure to attain a high ranking in the competitive exams to get into a government-funded institution where the tuition fees would be less. His father was the only earning hand in the family of five and could not afford to pay the hefty fees demanded by private engineering colleges. Their little grocery shop, situated in the busy street corner of the noisy and crowded neighborhood, earned the family its livelihood. His father wanted him to take care of the shop with him, as was their family tradition for generations. No one in their 12
GREEN CARD: Chasing the American Dream family had ever worked for someone else. However, Aseem had other dreams, those that would take him to the land of opportunities. He couldn’t envisage being a typical shopkeeper, listening to the rants of the customers as they bargained for each penny. When all cajoling and coaxing did not deter him, his father gave up and allowed him to take the competitive exams for the engineering college. On the day of the exam, Aseem got up early, unable to sleep due to the familiar knots in his stomach that bothered him at such times. He had a recurring nightmare each time he closed his eyes. He would be standing at the top of a skyscraper where the only way down was through a freefall. The streets below were filled with non-stop traffic, the bustle of the city looked like scrambling ants from atop. He would wake up perspiring heavily and feel a cry escape him. He just tossed and turned in the bed, waiting for the morning alarm, dozing off for a few minutes here and there. Breakfast was out of question as he always felt queasy when he had to take any test. In fact, he threw up after having a few sips of juice, that too only after much prodding from his concerned mother. With a fragile constitution and weak digestion, he looked like a thirteen-year old at the age of seventeen. His mother scolded him for behaving so ridiculously, just like she had every other exam morning before this one. She was aware of his old habits and nervousness too well. A mother’s heart is restless if her children have the slightest problem. Her main concern was making sure the children were well-fed and the family was properly taken care of. In this quest, she never realized that a better part of her days was spent in the kitchen, forgetting her dreams and her hobbies, losing the individuality that might have existed once. Suman had come into the Bansal household as a young, 19-year-old bride. Having completed her graduation in arts, she wanted to pursue painting and sketching when the marriage proposals started flocking in. Her parents being old13
Where it all Began school wanted their daughter to have only one career, that of a housewife, and despite her request for joining a master’s program in arts, they fixed her marriage with Ram Bansal. As his mother cleaned Aseem’s vomit from the floor, his father, Ram, wandered in asking for tea. Aseem touched his father’s feet for blessings and left home in anticipation. He rushed toward the examination hall in haste, still nervous, unable to recall any subject matter. He felt like everything that he learned had been forgotten. His mind felt like a blank slate. In the exam hall, Aseem kept fiddling with the pen until he saw the examiner come in with the exam papers. His initial nervousness and fear vanished after going through the questions. Chemistry was a breeze, and his face regain some of its lost color. He wrote the three papers for math, physics, and chemistry with enthusiasm and felt like a burden had been lifted off him, as he headed out of the exam room. It seemed like decades had passed since he had taken the exam. Now that the exam result was finally announced in the local newspaper that morning, he couldn’t believe it. The newspaper came as it did on all other mornings but today it changed Aseem’s world. All his efforts had been wasted and the entire career plan had dissipated. He was lost, scared, and felt threatened by what could happen next. The sun set and the moon came up, the birds scattered back to their homes and he had been sitting in his room the entire day, trying to recover from the disappointment from his exam result. Just like he was sitting right now – lost and disappointed – only this time, it was not an exam result but his own existence. “BANG!” A loud noise jolted Aseem out of his reverie of the past.
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