Studio G Magazine Spring 2007 - Kari Jobe

Gateway Women’s Magazine | studiogmag.com

Spring 2007

START FEELING YOUR BEST NOW!

7 Tips Towards Healthy Habits

FROM HEARTACHE TO HEALING

Confronting a Painful Past

IS A LACK OF REST AFFECTING YOUR SEX LIFE? WHEN A

CHILD

LIES

The Reward of a Radical Response

THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT

KARI

I’M LOSING MY MARRIAGE

PLEASE HELP! You Ask, Debbie Answers

THE FACTS ABOUT

FRIENDSHIP

A ONE-ON-ONE INTERVIEW

pink impact

PORTRAIT of DESTINY September 6–8, 2007 with special guest

Lisa Bevere Gateway Church 2121 E Southlake Blvd Southlake, Texas 76092 pinkimpact.com

Sing out your thanks to the Lord; sing praises to our God with a harp.

He covers the heavens with clouds, provides rain for the earth, and makes the grass grow in mountain pastures.

He gives food to the wild animals and feeds the young ravens when they cry.

He takes no pleasure in the strength of a horse or in human might.

No, the Lord’s delight is in those who fear Him, those who put their hope in His unfailing love.

Psalm 147:7–11 (NLT)

Indicates articles featured on the cover.

Contents Spring‘07 FEATURES The Best-Friend Myth

19

by Irini Fambro Learn how to be a good friend and share your friendships

20

by Debbie Morris 5 secrets to finding rest

Red Flowers and Sunflower Seeds

22

by Holly Bassham One woman’s story about how God answered her prayers … in a very creative way

16

SPOTLIGHT Kari Jobe: A Passionate Life

by Sarah Wronko Kari gets real about her life, her music and her dreams. If you think you already know what she has to say, think again.

Let’s Talk

24

CONTRIBUTORS

6

Living Gratefully

FYI Keeping You In The Know

7

HEALTH & FITNESS Motivational Tips for a Healthier Lifestyle

8

26

Perceived Love

28

by Carin Prickett An unconventional approach to discipline

Confessions of a Diehard Listmaker

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IN EVERY ISSUE

by Cindy Kelley Tragedy can hit anytime, but getting through it can draw you closer to God

by Judy Brisky Weathering the storms of life by developing an attitude of gratitude

20

Photo courtesy Josh Morris

Come to Me

SOLUTIONS FOR THE SOUL Dear Debbie 30

by Nancy Dotti Controlled by lists? There’s a cure!

ON THE COVER: Photo courtesy Steve Riley • steverileypictures.com

by Emily Gilstrap

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SPICE FOR LIFE From Our Kitchen to Yours 12 SMILE lol :)

32

PULSE Book & Music Reviews

34

Gateway Women’s Magazine EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Debbie Morris MANAGING EDITOR Sarah Wronko EDITORIAL DIRECTOR Stacy Burnett EDITOR S. George Thomas EDITORIAL ASSISTANT Joyce Freeman CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Holly Bassham, Judy Brisky, Nancy Dotti, Irini Fambro, Emily Gilstrap, Cindy Kelley & Carin Prickett CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Jenny Buchanan, Amy Heddington, Steve Riley & Josh Morris CREATIVE DIRECTION Gateway Media Ministries GRAPHIC DESIGNER Katrina Sirmon

Hello!

Welcome to the first issue of Studio G for 2007. Studio G actually grew out of the concept that we are all living in God’s studio, and He is crafting us into masterpieces worthy to bear His name.

Studio G is meant to inspire you to continue seeing yourself as God’s artwork.

I don’t know about you, but for me every new year inspires hope. We hope the things we didn’t like about the previous year will change. At the same time, we hope everything that was good will become great. We hope to lose weight, spend more time with God and the kids, get a raise or buy a new car or house. Hope inspires life. Because of hope, we buy diet books, devotionals and pick up real estate magazines. We love to hope.

I have hope in you. I hope you strive to display the Master.

Even while living in God’s studio, you are attractive. A few years ago, our family vacationed in Estes Park, Colorado. At the end of the main street in Estes Park was a glassblowing studio. This studio was more than just a showroom for finished pieces; it was a workstation with a viewing area to watch the craft and skill of the experienced glassblower, or gaffer, who, through a process of heating, contorting and reheating, took globs of molten glass and transformed it into works of art. The entire process was so fascinating to watch that people withstood the heat in the very warm workshop just to observe. You are just like that molded glass.

You may be wondering how the heated situations you find yourself in are going to be transformed into beauty, but in the Master’s hand, they always are.

Hope in God. Hope in yourself. Hope in the beauty that is coming.

I’m sure you’ve noticed that Studio G has a brand-new look and feel. I know you’ll enjoy the fresh changes and features that we’ve added. I also want to welcome Sarah Wronko who joined the Women’s Ministry staff this past fall. She is the new Managing Editor of Studio G and is also in charge of women’s outreaches.

Sarah’s enthusiasm for both areas of her ministry oversight make her a perfect choice.

Blessings,

GATEWAY CHURCH SERVICE TIMES

2121 E Southlake Blvd | Southlake, TX 76092 817.328.1000 | gatewaypeople.com

Debbie Morris Editor-in-Chief

Saturday | 4:00 pm, 5:45 pm & 7:30 pm Sunday | 9:00 am, 10:45 am & 12:30 pm

Spring 2007 5

Contributors Holly and her husband, Brad, have two children, Tristen and Olivia, and lead a Gateway Crown Financial Group. Holly is a stay-athome mom who enjoys volunteering in the church nursery and scrapbooking.

IRINI FAMBRO Irini, an ordained pastor through the Wesleyan Church, is passionate about preaching, teaching and writing. She has been married to her high school sweetheart, Kenneth, for seven years and is the mother of three-year-old Kalila.

JUDY BRISKY Judy and her husband, Mike, are homeschooling their two sons, Jacob and Joel. Judy also co-leads a Gateway Group, serves on the worship team and oversees Gateway Home Educators.

She enjoys reading, playing games and eating Mexican food.

EMILY GILSTRAP

CARIN PRICKETT

Emily, a former AllAmerican gymnast, has a Masters degree in Adult Fitness Management and over 24 years experience in the Health & Fitness industry. She is a Wellness Consultant and is married to Matthew, Gateway’s Director of Security.

Carin is the wife of Josh, an Emergency Room Physician.

They have two children, Jonathan and Whitney, who both attend OU. Carin has traveled and led worship with various ministries for over 23 years and enjoys teaching Bible studies and prayer schools.

NANCY DOTTI Nancy and her husband, Mike, have been members of Gateway for over five years and have two daughters, Carolyn and Janice. They enjoy discipling young people and working with the PreMarriage Ministry. Nancy also helps lead a Gateway Group.

CINDY KELLEY Cindy and her husband, Dennis, have been married for 25 years. They have three grown children: Amy, Amanda and DJ. Cindy’s favorite things to do include reading, traveling and spending time with her family.

Do you like to write? Do you have a story, recipe or some tips to share? This is your opportunity!

Studio G wants to hear from you. If you have an article you’d like to submit, please email it to studiog@gatewaypeople.com.

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DEBBIE MORRIS Debbie has been married to Pastor Robert Morris for over twenty-five years. They are blessed with two children at home and one married son. Debbie is the Editor-in-Chief of Studio G.

SARAH WRONKO Sarah is the Managing Editor for Studio G. Sarah and her husband, Aaron, have attended Gateway Church for over four years and live in Keller.

Together they lead a Gateway Group for young married couples.

Things to know: »» Short articles should be 500–700 words. »» Long articles should be 1200–1500 words. »» Please include a 30-word bio for yourself. »» Have someone proof your article before submitting it.

Photos courtesy Jenny Buchanan

HOLLY BASSHAM

studio fyi

STAYING SAFE THIS SPRING When you take walks, go with a friend and make sure someone always knows where you are.

Keep a full tank of gas in your car.

If you’re at the grocery store alone and it’s dark, ask the bagger to walk you to your car.

Keep your garage door closed.

Always be aware of your surroundings.

Before you unlock your car, be aware of what’s around you.

If there’s a van parked next to your car on the driver’s side and you can’t see inside of it, slide into your car through the passenger’s side.

Before you get into your car, look in the backseat first.

Walk purposefully and with your head up. Make sure your hands are at your side and not in your pockets. This signifies that you are aware of your surroundings, and it makes you a less likely target.

ur favorite What is yo adition? summer tr r fun? for summe e m ti e k a um ers How do yo ail your answ ow! Em We want to kn tewaypeople.com. to studiog@ga

Keeping You In The Know TIPS ON TIPPING Dining Waiter/Waitress: 15%–20% of the bill, unless a gratuity is already added to the bill Buffet Restaurant: 10% of the bill Pizza Delivery: $1 per pizza or 10% of the bill

Hotels Room Service: 15% of the total bill, unless a gratuity is added, then no additional tip or $1

Personal Services Hair Salon: 15% of the total cost Spa Service: 15%–20%, if a service charge is not included. Ask that the gratuity be divided among the providers

Travel Taxi: 15% of the fare

Bellhop: $1 per bag plus a couple extra if he shows you to your room

Parking Valets: $1–$2 when you leave your car and again when they get your car

Coat Check: $1 per coat

Taken from drdaveanddee.com/tipping

SPRING OUT OF WINTER!

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

Set up a weekly walking date with a friend to take in nature’s new look.

Take your lunch outside for a spontaneous picnic.

Clear the clutter out of your closet by packing away your coats and sweaters.

Buy a new magazine on spring fashions, and head to the mall for some shopping.

Go to your local nursery, and pick your favorite flowers to adorn your front porch or garden.

Spring 2007 7

studio health & fitness

Motivational Tips for a Healthier Lifestyle Emily Gilstrap In the midst of life’s busyness, it’s often difficult for people to get motivated about implementing a healthy lifestyle.

Sometimes motivation comes from the discontent that people feel about their health. Other times, unfortunately, it takes a major health crisis to bring an individual to the point of change. While the hardest step is always the first one, following these practical tips will help you develop the habits necessary to begin and sustain a healthier lifestyle. >>AVOID EXCUSES Don’t fall into the biggest excuse trap: “I don’t have any time.” If you don’t take the time now to take care of your health and fitness, you may have to take time out later for illness and immobility. Prioritize your time daily to prepare healthy snacks and meals. Saying yes to exercise may mean saying no to something else. Wake up earlier and make a 20-minute workout part of your day.

>>TAKE BABY STEPS Research shows that making gradual changes

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in any behavior brings about the most success and develops permanency.

Wellness isn’t a quick fix; it’s a lifestyle. As you begin to live a healthier lifestyle, don’t try to immediately take drastic measures such as eliminating fat, sugar and preservatives from your diet and doing 90 minutes of high-intensity cardiovascular training every day. Instead, take baby steps by doing things like drinking an extra glass of water every day and incorporating two 20-minute cardiovascular workouts into your day.

>>BE SPECIFIC It is often said that failing to plan is planning to fail.

So set specific goals, make plans and write it all down.

Because of the power of visualization, writing down your goals will move you closer towards accomplishing them. The Bible says in Proverbs 23:7a (NASB), “For as he thinks within himself, so he is.” Have a clear picture in your mind’s eye of what you hope to obtain outwardly and inwardly.

For example, deciding that you want to be better about doing “all this wellness

stuff ” isn’t very specific or clear. Instead, set a specific goal like: “I want to see a 2% drop in overall body fat and feel a noticeable change in my stamina after climbing the stairs at work.”

>>AVOID THE QUACKERY TRAP Many fad diets, fitness gimmicks and health gadgets promise quick and easy results. But if it sounds too good to be true, then it is. The Bible says, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death. A simple man believes anything, but a

prudent man gives thought information. Proverbs 10:14 to his steps” (Proverbs 14:12, (NKJV) says, “Wise people 15, NIV). Don’t fall for a lie, store up knowledge.” And because Satan is waiting for Hosea 4:6 (NKJV) says, the chance to steal, kill and “My people are destroyed for destroy you ( John 10:10). lack of knowledge.” We all need regular reminders of >>AVOID the benefits from engaging COMPARISON in healthy behaviors. Sign Avoid comparing yourself up for an online wellness to others, to what you newsletter or magazine looked like in the past and subscription from a to unrealistic Hollywood reputable organization. standards, because this only breeds frustration and >>BE ACCOUNTABLE defeat. Be the best that you Ecclesiastes 4:9 (NASB) can from this point forward, says, “Two are better than and don’t look back at the one because they have past. Luke 9:62 (NKJV) a good return for their says, “No one, having put labor.” The likelihood of his hand to the plough, and you sticking to a healthy looking back, is fit for the lifestyle increases when you kingdom of God.” The are accountable to someone.

Bible also says, “Forget The Bible also says, “Bad the former things; do not company corrupts good dwell on the past. See, I character” (1 Corinthians am doing a new thing!”

15:33, NIV). Because we (Isaiah 43:18–19, NIV). tend to become like those >>GET GOOD whom we hang around with, find positive role models INFORMATION who are health-minded Surround yourself with and who inspire you. ó scientifically accurate

Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (NLT)

∏

Heavenly Father, I confess that I’ve fallen short of glorifying and honoring You with my body, and I ask for Your forgiveness.

Your Word promises me that I can do all things through Christ and that You will give me both the will and the power to obey You. From this day forward, I surrender my eating, drinking, sleeping, exercise and other activities concerning my health to the lordship of Jesus Christ. I ask for Your continued wisdom in setting priorities, managing my time and planning my daily activities. Because You’ve given me the gift of life, I offer my body now as a living sacrifice.

∏

Can marriage really be heaven on earth?

In their new book, The Blessed Marriage, Pastor Robert and Debbie Morris give you the insights you need to build a fulfilling and lasting marriage. Through personal stories and biblical principles, this book will help you create a foundation of intimacy and communication between you and your spouse. Whether you’re in a great marriage or a struggling marriage, The Blessed Marriage will help you achieve the marriage God designed for you.

Get your copy of The Blessed Marriage today at the Gateway bookstore or online at gatewaypeople.com.

Spring 2007 9

studio solutions for the soul

Photo courtesy Amy Heddington

Dear Debbie M

y husband and I are actively involved in serving at Gateway and in Gateway Groups. We really have a heart to serve and to see people embrace all that God has for them. In the process of serving as Gateway Group leaders, we often find that people come to us to share their hearts and their struggles. My problem is that I really care for these people, and I find that I end up carrying their burdens more than I should.

Lately, I have found it difficult to fall asleep at night because I’m worried about the latest person that has come to me for help and counsel. I also have a hard time enjoying free time with my husband on off days, because my heart is still heavy from the last person I’ve counseled with or listened to. I know the Bible tells us to cast our cares on the Lord, and I know that I’m to be anxious for nothing and to present my requests to the Lord with thanksgiving, but how do I make these words a reality and not just “words”? ~Heavy-Laden in Fort Worth

Thank you for investing your heart and soul into the kingdom of God. You and your husband are involved in the eternal. Your investment is the strength of Gateway and the kingdom of God. I love the tenderness of your heart and your deep God-given passion and sense of caring for people. It is a strength of your character. However, the enemy loves to take our strengths and turn them into our weaknesses or into ungodly burdens. He loves to harass us and place undue burdens on us by suggesting that if we were better counselors, we would have instructions that could immediately change others’ circumstances.

For years, I struggled with feeling helpless to change people’s situations, and then one day it dawned on me: Only

10 Studio G

God can change people. I am not responsible to change things. In that same moment, I realized people don’t get into their messes overnight and they won’t get out of them overnight (unless by a miracle of God). So the work is God’s.

You may have to train yourself not to rehearse their cares continuously but rather to replay God’s faithfulness in your life to remind yourself that He will take care of those you care so deeply about.

I

’ve been married for four years, and my husband and I have one child. Six months ago, my husband started a new job and also began taking classes at one of the local universities. Our lives have been very hectic; however, during all this transition, my husband has started to distance himself from our marriage. He has even started talking about separation. I also have a hard time trusting him, because one of his co-workers that he spends a lot of time with is a female. He says they’re just friends, but I don’t think their friendship is appropriate.

I’m afraid of being abandoned and having to raise our child on my own as a single parent. I love my husband dearly, and I don’t want to lose my marriage. Please help. ~Trusting Him in Dallas

If I were living in your shoes, I would be concerned as well.

I believe marriage is a union of best friends. It is a mutually exclusive best friend agreement. Your natural inclination may be to resort to high school-type tactics, but I’ve never found that to produce long-term results.

Instead, be offensive. Start praying for God to intervene on your behalf. God wants your marriage to succeed. Ask God to show you where you are wrong, and repent to God and your husband. Then court him back into the intimacy you once enjoyed by honoring him. Be sure to tell him everything he’s doing right. Another suggestion is to become involved in what he enjoys. If he loves football, force yourself to watch the game on Sunday with him. One last piece of advice: you should never forget the romance. Purchase new sleepwear (not flannel) or approach him with nothing but an alluring smile, and see if that doesn’t pull his attention back towards you. Results may not come overnight, but I believe God will bless your efforts.

I

’m a new mom, and before I became a mother, I was very involved with writing and playing music as well as singing. My prayer life was active, and I felt like a woman of purpose. Now that I’m a mom, my prayer life seems to be non-existent, sleep is something of the past, my music books have gathered dust, and I often find myself feeling short on patience with my husband. I feel like I’m unable to do the things that are important to me, and advice on finding a way to schedule my life sounds like Greek to me right now. I feel like I’m without a purpose. I want to be a loving mother and wife, but right now I don’t know how. Please help. ~In Need of Purpose

Thanks for writing. You sound like many other young moms suffering from lack of sleep, and little “you” time. So first let me remind you, what you are experiencing is quite normal.

This is a difficult season for many moms. One mom described it best when she said, “I didn’t know how selfish I was until I had my baby and everything became about the baby.” Everything in your world is about caring for your baby, and it just doesn’t allow you the time you once enjoyed for other things. I have good news—it won’t always be like this.

Before you know it, your baby will be crawling across the room, and then all too soon, he’ll be out the door for college.

As a mom, I remember the long days of caring for my small infants, and now I have to look up at all of them.

Embrace this season and enjoy it. When you’re old, you’ll never regret nurturing your baby. Someday soon, you will have time to pursue all of your passions without any guilt or regrets.

Pray for the grace to do what is important for the day and then relax. I think you’ll find that you enjoy your baby and husband much more.

I

know that you’ve been saved since you were very young, but when did you know that God was calling you into full-time ministry? ~Just Wondering

When I was a child, my grandmother witnessed to me. She was a very devout Christian who believed that if the Word of God was being preached, we should participate. One week when I was staying with my grandparents, Billy Graham came on the TV, and my grandmother insisted we have church in front of the TV. All I wanted to do was go play with my cousin, but just like in church, she wouldn’t allow us to play, talk or move around. Billy Graham was on all three TV stations (I know that statement dates me) in a staggered formation, so my grandmother made us watch the same sermon three times. After he was finally off, my grandmother got us in her lap with her big Bible and explained the plan of salvation to us again. Sadly, I didn’t accept Christ that night.

I only wanted to go play. Several years later, my grandmother died, and her death made eternity real. I began to think about the night we watched Billy Graham on TV and about my grandmother’s words. I knew I wanted to know the God of my grandmother. So in a church revival, I asked Jesus into my heart.

As far as being called into full-time ministry, that was also shaped as a child. My uncle was a pastor in a Baptist church. I remember visiting them and thinking they had to have the best job in the world, because they got to work for God. I never told anyone, but I knew I wanted to be involved in ministry. Being shy, I couldn’t see myself in any position other than as a wife. I love being Robert’s wife. I love being involved in ministry and working for the Lord. I still think it’s the best job in the world!

Blessings,

Debbie

“Dear Debbie” letters are answered by Debbie Morris. If you have a question that you would like to submit to “Dear Debbie,” please email it to deardebbie@gatewaypeople.com. Everything that is submitted is anonymous and won’t be shared with third parties. By submitting your questions, you give us permission to edit and publish. Only questions published will be answered.

Spring 2007 11

studio spice for life

From Our Kitchen to Yours The Way to a Man’s Heart Really Is Through His Stomach!

Sarah Wronko Before my husband, Aaron, and I started dating, we were best friends. We did everything together. We studied, went to the movies, went swing dancing and did all those things that require the companionship of one’s best friend. The week of his birthday, I finally realized that I was actually falling in love with my best friend, and I decided that I was going to really impress him. I wanted to show him that not only did I make a great friend, but I could also make a great wife! Someone wise once said that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. So on the evening of his birthday, I served him my homemade lasagna and it worked! He was so impressed by his birthday dinner that I’ve been making it for him ever since. It’s now tradition in the Wronko household that I always make Aaron my “Lovers Lasagna” on his birthday.

LOVERS LASAGNA 16 oz package oven-ready lasagna noodles 2 lbs cottage cheese (small curd) 1 lb ricotta cheese 2 cups parmesan cheese

Preheat oven to 325°. Brown ground beef and then mix with spaghetti sauce. Add garlic and mushrooms, and set aside. Mix ricotta cheese, cottage cheese, 1 cup parmesan cheese, basil and parsley in a large bowl, and set aside.

1 bunch fresh parsley (finely chopped)

Layering: 1. Put small amount of sauce in bottom of the pan 2. Layer of noodles 3. Layer of the cheese mixture 4. Layer of mozzarella cheese 5. Layer of spaghetti sauce 6. Repeat 2 times 7. Top with leftover mozzarella cheese and parmesan cheese 8. Drizzle olive oil over the top

7 portabella mushrooms (chopped)

Bake for 45 minutes. Serve and enjoy!

olive oil

Serves 15

1½ lbs mozzarella cheese 1½ lbs ground beef 2 jars spaghetti sauce (24 oz) 5 garlic cloves (crushed) 1 bunch fresh basil (finely chopped)

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BREAD PUDDING 10 oz stale French bread, crumbled pineapple juice 4 cups cream 2 cups sugar 8 T butter

6 eggs ½ cup peach liqueur (Pecher Mignon preferred) 2 T vanilla 1 cup chopped, toasted pecans

Soak the stale, crumbled French bread in pineapple juice overnight.

Combine all the ingredients. Pour the mixture into a baking pan, and bake at 350° for about 1 hour and 15 minutes. The top should be golden brown.

(I always place my pan of ingredients into a larger pan and then pour water halfway up the side of the baking pan. This makes the pudding more like custard.)

Serve the warm bread pudding with warm peach liqueur sauce.

1 t cinnamon 1 t nutmeg 1 cup finely chopped frozen or fresh peaches 1 cup golden raisins

PEACH LIQUEUR SAUCE 1 stick butter at room temperature 1½ cups powdered sugar 2 egg yolks ½ cup peach liqueur (Pecher Mignon preferred) ½ cup finely minced fresh or defrosted peaches Cream butter and sugar over low heat until smooth.

Blend in egg yolks. Pour in peach liqueur. Blend. Add in and slowly blend minced peaches.

Serves 12-16

CAJUN COURAGE Laura Byrne My dad’s ancestors are Cajuns who were descendants of the French Acadians exiled by the British from Nova Scotia in 1755. In the years that followed, the men and women who survived found a safe haven in south Louisiana. The area where the Acadians settled became known as the French Triangle of Louisiana, or Acadiana, which is the area where I grew up.

In my Cajun grandmother’s kitchen, bread pudding was called by its Cajun French name pain perdu, or lost bread in English. In the Cajun culture, it is a crime to

let anything go to waste. When bread is allowed to go stale before being completely used up, the bread is considered “lost.” But since a Cajun woman never squanders, my grandmother Lydia, like her ancestors before her, turned lost bread into a dessert worthy of her heritage. Whenever I bake bread pudding in my own oven, I’m reminded of the strong and courageous men and women who never gave up in the face of extreme hardships and who brought their families to a new territory and a new life.

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Spring 2007 mag.com Magazine | studiog Gateway Women’s

Start Feeling W! t no Your BeS ards Healthy Habits 7 tips tow

From HeartaCHe to Healing

ful Past

Confronting a Pain

T is a Lack of res affecTing Your sex Life?

WHen a

I’M lOSInG My MArrIAGe

lIeS

Se HelPrs! Plea Ask, Debbie Answe

CHilD d

the rewar of a radical response

There’s someThing abouT

you

t

tHe FaCtS aBou

kari

FrienDSHiP

A One-On-One IntervIeW

07

Spring 20

Do you have a friend that would love to receive Studio G? Contact us at 817.552.3756 or email your friend’s name and mailing address to studiog@gatewaypeople.com.

Studio G is published by the Women’s Ministries of Gateway Church, a nonprofit corporation, Southlake, Texas USA © 2007 Gateway Church. All rights reserved.

Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission is prohibited. Studio G has no subscription price and is supported through ministry contributions worldwide.

All gifts to this ministry are tax deductible (in countries where this applies). For more information or to order, call 817.552.3756. Internet address: studiogmag.com

Photo courtesy Steve Riley • steverileypictures.com

studio solutions for the soul

14 Studio G

studio spotlight

a passionate life t

here’s something about Kari Jobe that has always intrigued me: No matter how many people know her, how many times her songs are played on the local radio stations and how many times she sings on the platform at Gateway Church in front of thousands of people, she is still humbly dependent on the Lord and focused on pleasing Him. When I asked her what helps her stay so connected to the Lord in the midst of all that is happening around her, she said, “I stay grounded because of the experiences I have had of absolutely knowing that God is real. It’s not about me. It’s all about Him.” I’ve attended Gateway Church now for nearly five years, and I’ve always been blessed by Kari’s

Sarah Wronko

melodious voice and her songs of love and adoration to the Lord. Since I’ve never had the opportunity to sit down with her for a one-on-one chat, I eagerly awaited our rendezvous over coffee at one of her favorite little spots—Sandella’s Cafe. Sitting down with coffee in hand, Kari settled into the overstuffed sofa. “I would love to one day buy a house and turn it into a coffee shop where all of the rooms would have different themes, and I would live upstairs,” she said with a twinkle in her eye.

While twirling her silver necklace around her finger, Kari told me about her family and what a wonderful influence they’ve been on her. Before she was even born, her parents, Mark and Sandy Jobe, were given a grave verdict regarding her health. Kari’s mother, Sandy, was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and underwent surgery. After her surgery, Sandy continued to feel sick. So the doctor

Spring 2007 15

ordered extensive x-rays to make sure there were no more tumors throughout her body. During this time, Sandy was exposed to high levels of radiation. When the doctor performed more tests on her, they discovered she was pregnant. The bad news was, the x-rays and the surgery that had been performed were extremely harmful for unborn babies.

Kari explains: “The doctor gently told my parents what was wrong and then proceeded to tell them that they should just abort me due to all the radiation my mom

“I have been

wrecked

by Him.” was exposed to and the medicine she was given for the surgery. The doctor believed I wouldn’t develop properly and that I would be a vegetable for the rest of my life. Well, through tear-stained faces, my parents told the doctor that they would never dream of having an abortion. They would just trust God and carry me for nine months.

So that’s what my mom did, and although she was very sick the majority of the time, she carried me to full term. I was a miracle baby; I came out completely healthy! The Lord made sure I was protected during the surgery and throughout all the treatments.

I think He just put His hand over my little body and protected me from any complications.”

When I asked Kari what she wanted to be when she was a little girl, she said, “Honestly, I wanted to be a singer.” She continued, “I’ve always loved music and would watch other girls who sang at church or on a stage, and I had such a great amount of admiration for them. I started singing when I was two. My mom and dad traveled and ministered in churches, and they would

16 Studio G

have me sing because they thought it was cute. After that, I just never wanted to quit singing.”

Through traveling with her parents and experiencing the presence of God at such an early age, Kari knew from the time she was young that life was all about God and having a vibrant and real relationship with Him. I asked her to talk about when she first started to feel God’s call to ministry.

“When I was 10 years old, my parents were counseling and helping some of my extended family with marital problems.

Even though I was very young, I understood that my family members were hurting. At one point in time, I was riding in the back seat of our van listening to the song ‘I Wait for the Day’ by Michelle Patterson, and I was so moved. I wanted to sing like that. I wanted to minister to people through songs that bring life and healing.”

When she wasn’t singing with worship teams and enjoying God’s presence during youth group, Kari enjoyed playing volleyball for seven years, dancing her way through ballet classes and experiencing the delights of being the homecoming queen of L.D. Bell High School in Hurst, Texas. She later went on to attend Oral Roberts University, Christ for the Nations Institute (CFNI) and Dallas Baptist University and received her Bachelor’s degree in Pastoral Ministries and Psychology with a minor in music.

At the age of 25, Kari is the oldest of three children, and she says that her sister Kristen is one of her closest friends. “Kris knows me—all of me—and she sees me as more than just a singer. She sees me for who I really am and loves me unconditionally.

Also, my brother, Caleb, is the most amazing brother ever!”

Kari has always had a strong love from God for people and a desire for people to love the Lord through worship. In her eyes, “Worship is an intersection. It’s where heaven and earth kiss.” Kari says her greatest dream in life “would be to stand in a stadium full of lost people who have come seeking God’s presence. As people gave their lives to Him, I would be singing

What’s playing on Kari’s iPod? Hillsong • Rascal Flatts United Live • Brooke Fraser Coldplay • Dave Barnes World Mandate

(Antioch Community Church)

Snow Patrol • Misti Edwards

to the Lord. I don’t even know if I’d actually be able to sing though, because I’m sure I would just be weeping. Salvation is the most beautiful gift. I would also love to start an orphanage some day to help take care of God’s little kids.”

As I was speaking with Kari, I couldn’t help but be intrigued by the passion and excitement for life that emanates through her. This passion, she tells me, “comes from moments spent on my face in God’s presence. Whether that’s been in a worship service in my youth group growing up, at NewBreed youth camps, Oral Roberts University, CFNI or in my own bedroom, God has revealed Himself and His presence to me in such real ways through visions, dreams and glimpses of His glory. I like to say that ‘I have been wrecked by Him.’ I desire nothing less than more of Him. He is so good.”

Kari’s knowledge of God and experience with Him causes her to live a life devoted

Spring 2007 17

Photo courtesy Integrity Media

Purchase Kari’s album at www.karijobe.com or in the Gateway Bookstore.

Learn more about Kari and her music at myspace.com/karijobemusic.

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completely to worshipping God in all that she does. “Worship is one of the only things we do here on earth that we’ll also do in heaven.” Kari explained, “I don’t think we understand even a mere glimpse of all that God is worth. He deserves our everything. I wish we all understood more of the power we have in the authority of Jesus. He conquered death and the grave; He’s not limited by anything. In the Bible, God says He will exchange our spirit of heaviness with a garment of praise. The atmosphere of our lives can be altered by His presence because He is so good. His name is above every other name. His name and His ways are all that we need. So no matter the circumstances, whether big or small, He can cover, shelter, rescue, love and forgive. This is why the enemy fights so hard to keep us from worshipping and spending time with the Lord.

If we don’t worship, I think we forget just how powerful God is and how powerless Satan is.”

As I watched Kari interact with the people walking in and out of Sandella’s who recognized her, I was once again reminded by how kindhearted she is. She shows kindness to all those around her without partiality. Kari is an amazing role model, not only for women and the younger generation but also for all those who wish to experience God deeper in worship. When I asked her about how she’d like to impact the next generation, she said, “If I could say anything to the next generation, I would tell them to never ever, no matter what, settle for less than God’s best for their life. He knows our dreams and goals better than we do, and He will completely and totally direct our steps and help us to guard our hearts all throughout our lives. I could have been saved from many heartbreaks and heartaches if I would have held onto this truth. Let Him have your heart until He lets you give it away … whether to your dreams or a future mate. He’s more committed to seeing your destiny come to pass than you are.”

Kari is passionate for God, life, people, worship and living her dreams. As her three friends entered the café to join her for what was now the lunch hour, Kari left me with one last thought: “You only live once, so live life to the fullest, without regret, and follow your heart!” ó

Getting to know Kari What are your favorite movies?

Ever After, Pride & Prejudice, Toy Story and Ice Age (I love Sid the sloth!)

Where are your favorite shopping spots?

Anthropologie, Forever 21, Urban Outfitters and vintage thrift stores What is your favorite flower?

Gerber Daisy What is your favorite type of food?

Greek or Japanese What do you do to just chill out?

Watch a chick flick, get a massage or go shopping What is your favorite childhood memory?

Hanging out with my adopted grandpa and learning how to drive his Model T car What is your favorite place to hang out?

Coffee shops when it’s freezing cold or raining outside What is your favorite type of music?

Worship or Christmas music If you could have dinner with any four living people, who would they be?

President George W. and First Lady Laura Bush, Darlene Zschech and the Queen of England What would people be surprised to know about you?

I worked at Sonic for seven years as a carhop

The Best-Friend Myth Irini Fambro

O

f all the places I would never return to, the first would be Junior High.

And yet sometimes, I feel like I’m stuck there. I remember and often relive the dream of wanting a best friend. Somewhere in the course of life, I was subconsciously taught to pursue a best friend—not many good friends, just one “best friend.” In Junior High, that best friend came in the form of long telephone calls, sleepovers and notes at school. As an adult, I find myself wanting this same exclusive friendship but in a different package. I want a friend who calls me all the time, who I have lunches with and who often hangs out at my house and vice versa.

But why do I try and make one person “it?” What if God blesses me with many friends? And what if those friends have many friends? What does being in an exclusive friendship prove? Why does it still feel like I have to prove my worth by the friendships I have or the friendships that have chosen me?

Is this adulthood, or is it me standing on the

sidelines in gym class begging to be picked?

With age should come wisdom, so why do I feel as though I’m regressing?

Please understand that I’m not trying to disqualify close friendships. But at what cost have my exclusive friendships come? Why can’t I learn the lessons I keep begging my three-yearold to learn—share! Why is it awkward to tell one friend that I’m hanging out with another? Why do I keep having confessional moments with two friends about how I envy the amount of time they spend with each other?

Girls are messy! Who needs soap operas? I only need to call one of my girlfriends to remember

this. Because where there are women, there is drama. I want to be at a place where I’m excited about my friends having other friendships.

My friendships are some of the greatest evangelistic tools I have, and yet I don’t use it as a tool for God’s kingdom but rather as a badge to declare my worth.

I often find myself surrounded by some of the most fabulous women I’ve ever known, and somehow I still feel lonely. But now I know that loneliness is a lie, and I’m not alone.

Once we realize that God picked us first, it changes everything. I mean it really changes everything—how we date, our marriages, our vocations, how we look at ourselves and yes, even our friendships.

When Moses asked God what His name was, God replied, “I AM THAT I AM” (Exodus 3:14, ASV).

Do you need someone to brainstorm with? God says: I AM. That’s Me. I can be that. In fact, I already AM! Do you need a person to sort through your anxieties with? God is saying to you:

I already AM that. How about a shoulder to cry on? Someone to scream at? A mother, a father, a husband, and yes, a best friend? God says: I AM. I AM. I AM. I AM. I AM. I AM! My revelation came when I realized that it’s not that God could be these things for me, but that He already is. I just wasn’t recognizing it.

Now I’m seeking to find that balance of walking in the assurance God gives me of my value and having friendships. It’s a choice we all have. We can either invest in our friendships or keep our friendship to ourselves. Although it’s often easier to give up and go home, we’re far better women when we invest in our friendships. I connect with each of the women in my life in such a unique way. I could have one best friend if I could convince about six women to merge into one person. But since that’s highly unlikely and impossible, I will stick to being blessed and blessing others by being a friend and sharing mine too! ó

I often find myself surrounded by some of the most fabulous women I’ve ever known, and somehow

I STILL FEEL LONELY

Spring 2007 19

come to me Debbie Morris

The alarm is sounding, and the sun is shining through the drapes. You know you need to get out of bed, but your body is screaming at you: “NO! JUST A FEW MINUTES MORE!” Responsibilities demand that you get dressed for work and get the kids up and off to school, so there’s no more time for

coffee. Having so much to do with so little time leaves most women exhausted.

We know and live the adage: “A woman’s work is never done.” Yet in the midst of all our busyness, Jesus said, “Come to Me, and I will give you rest.”1 Lack of rest could be affecting many areas of your life including your sex life, weight, anger

lovemaking.3 Fatigue is a huge contributor to lack of interest. In Intimate Issues, Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus point out that “the mind is the most important sexual organ.”4 However, tired minds don’t want another thing to check off the list of “To Dos.” So remember that a little rest could fan the flame in the

the average couple spends no more than one hour a week in lovemaking your body to rest. Not only are your primary responsibilities insistent on being completed, there are also other items you need to do as well. You need to exercise and have your quiet time, but there’s also the school project you agreed to help with, and the boss has really been demanding lately. All of this comes at you before you’ve even had a chance to find your slippers and have a cup of 20 Studio G

management and health.

“According to a survey of almost six thousand parents

by Parenting magazine, 80 percent of husbands and wives agree that their sex life had suffered as a result of having children.”2 All mothers can attest to the fact that children place a strenuous load on their time. You may be surprised, however, that the average couple spends no more than one hour a week in

romance department.

Scientists at Columbia University in New York City studied 3,692 people and discovered that those who slept five hours a night were fifty percent more likely to be obese than those who slept seven to nine hours. As incredible as it sounds, sleeping could help you lose those extra pounds. According to an article in Self magazine, “Research has shown that

compared with those who got ten hours of sleep a night, people who had only four hours of sleep for two nights running experienced hormonal changes: a dip in hunger-suppressing leptin along with a rise in appetiteboosting ghrelin.”5 So tonight, when you prepare for bed, pray that leptin will work as God designed it to and rest a little lighter.

When 722 women were asked what some of the factors were that increased their vulnerability to anger, fatigue was the number one response.6 We’re not really mad at little Joe for spilling his milk; we’re exhausted from the demands of life.

If we could have had ten minutes to rest after work and before preparing for dinner, our response may have been totally different.

Rest changes our outlook and our responses.

Another reason to consider getting more rest is your health. Research published in the Archives of Internal Medicine reveals that sleeping five or fewer hours a night raises a woman’s risk for coronary artery disease by

50 percent. Sleep expert Dr. Janet M. Mullington says that C-reactive protein levels, a signal of inflammation which is linked to heart attack and stroke, is as similar for sleep-deprived people as it is for people with a known heart disease risk.7 So are you convinced yet that we need more rest? But how do we do it? Laundry, jobs, diapers, dishes, carpools and school projects have to get done.

Where do we start? Here are some suggestions:

1

The Lord said, “Come to Me, and I will give you rest.” Ask Him to help you find the rest you need.

2

Prioritize.

Sometimes it’s hard to know what is important and what isn’t.

Your priorities should line up with life goals and not with temporary gratifications. You may need to start saying “no” to much more than you’ve grown accustomed to.

3

Give yourself some room. After you’ve come up with your list of important things for the day, evaluate it. Can you get it all done? If you feel like you can get four items done in a particular day, cut your list down to three items to relieve some of the pressure. Consider this, God didn’t create the universe in one day. He accomplished one day’s work and then said, “It is good.” Pacing yourself will grant you more peace when it’s time to go to bed.

sleeping five or fewer hours a night raises a woman’s risk for coronary artery disease by 50 percent Accomplish three things and feel good about it rather than not completing four or five things and experiencing frustration.

4

Plan real time off.

God instructed the Israelites to take a sabbatical (a day of rest) once a week. Most of us may feel that taking so much time off is completely out of the question, and maybe we can’t get a whole day. But start by asking your husband to help you get two hours a week to rest without kids, laundry and responsibilities. (This would be a great time to mention that rest could increase your sexual desire.) When you get the time, don’t go shopping or out with a friend—find a quiet spot to rest, sleep and quiet your mind.

5

Explore your sleep cycle. Fixed times to wake up and go to bed are beneficial. If you’re not getting eight hours of sleep, you might

look at your evening routine.

Consider establishing a rule of turning off the computer and television an hour before you hope to be asleep. In that hour, look for a pattern that leads you to relax such as a warm bath, soft mellow music, reading self-help books (stay away from the thrillers) or sex (if you’re married!).

Throughout history, when God’s people trusted Him and rested, He provided for their physical needs. God’s desire for His people to be rested elevates Him above all other gods.

He isn’t a taskmaster who desires us to perform. He longs for us to come and find rest in His arms. ó 1

Matthew 11:28

2

Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus, Intimate Issues, p. 67

3

Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus, Intimate Issues, p. 45

4

Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus, Intimate Issues, p. 23

5

Self, May 2005, p. 212

6

Gary J. Oliver and H. Norman Wright, A Woman’s Forbidden Emotion, p. 21

7

Self, May 2005, p. 213

Red I Flowers and Sunflower Seeds Holly Bassham

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t was the spring of 2004, and my son was nearly finished with third grade. A note had come home that each child needed to bring a plant to school for the class’ outdoor garden.

My husband and I had recently been through the Crown Financial study, and we were really trying to get our finances in order by not spending any money that wasn’t absolutely necessary.

Knowing that our son had to bring his plant in just a couple of days before payday, I decided to wait as long as possible before spending the couple of dollars needed to buy the plant.

The day the plant was due also happened to be the day I was attending the school’s appreciation breakfast for their volunteers. So I got out of bed extra early to have my quiet time with God, because I wanted time to make myself presentable to appear in public rather than just dropping the kids off in my usual sweats, T-shirt and ponytail. During my quiet time that morning, I just became overwhelmed with thankfulness for everything the Lord had brought us through, and I began expressing my gratefulness to God. I told Him that I just wanted to obey Him in everything and that even though I knew He gave blessings for obedience; I didn’t need the blessings because being close to Him was more than enough.

When we got out of the car, my son reminded me that his plant was due that day, and I promised him I’d run out and get one after my volunteer breakfast was over. As I walked my son to his classroom, I asked him, “What kind of plant do you want? A green leafy one or something with a flower?” He told me that he wanted a flower, and then he said that he also wanted a small gift for his teacher like a packet of

sunflower seeds, because he knew that she loved sunflowers. I kissed him goodbye, and as I was walking away, I asked, “Oh, by the way, what color flower do you want?” He paused to think for a moment before entering his classroom and then said, “Red.” The school cafeteria was all set up for the appreciation breakfast, and the PTA had done a great job of helping us forget that we were sitting in tiny chairs in a cafeteria. Tables were decorated with tablecloths and centerpieces, and the buffet line was loaded with delicious items that the teachers had brought in. While standing in line, I was mentally talking to God and still thinking about how I wanted to obey God in everything. So I asked Him, “Which table would You like me to sit at?”

I chose a seat beside a nice lady who’s married to a pastor from a nearby small church, and I struck up a conversation with her about how they were enjoying their new building. She seemed preoccupied and didn’t really talk much, so I thought to myself, “Oh well,” and began visiting with someone else. Before the breakfast wrapped up, the PTA had some door prize drawings to give away. The first lady at our table won some lotion from Bath & Body Works, and I won a hot pink T-shirt that said, “Somebody stop me before I volunteer.” Now I love door prizes, and I usually like the things I win, but this T-shirt was just not me!

The woman who won the lotion kept commenting on how she had tons of it at home and probably wouldn’t get to it for two years, so I thought to myself, “Maybe she’d like a lovely pink T-shirt.”

I asked her if she’d like to trade, and to my surprise, she was thrilled to!

Two other women at our table also ended up winning things. One lady won a Starbucks gift card, and another lady won a plant, but she didn’t seem too happy about it. When she got back to our table, she began talking about how her plant would most likely be dead within a week. But when I saw

the plant, I felt a delicious shiver of surprise. This was no ordinary plant; it was a red flower with three individual plants in it! Thinking to trade yet again, I offered my lotion in exchange for the flower, and she snatched it right up. Before we all left, the organizers of the appreciation breakfast told us that the seed packets in the centerpieces were also for us, and they told us to be sure we grabbed one before we left. By now I’m sure you can guess what seeds were at our table—sunflower seeds!

I couldn’t believe it. Not only did God provide a plant for my son’s garden, He also provided sunflower seeds for my son’s teacher!

Remember the question I asked God as I stood in line and looked around at all the tables in the room?

When I saw the pastor’s wife, I felt like I should sit with her and encourage her. However, because she didn’t seem too thrilled to visit, I figured that I had just missed it.

When I came home and told my husband what had happened, he was pretty excited about it too.

After I finished telling the story, I

heard the Lord say, “You still don’t get it.” I wasn’t quite sure what He meant, so I asked Him to clarify.

He said, “Remember what you asked Me before you sat down? You wanted to know which table to sit at.

You did choose the right table, but My reason for having you sit there wasn’t what you thought. I didn’t want you to visit with the pastor’s wife; I wanted you to sit there so I could bless you.

Do you think it was a coincidence that four of the five women at your table won a door prize? Do you think it was just by chance that the gifts at that table would be a T-shirt, lotion and a red plant? Do you think I didn’t know that there were sunflower seeds on that table, and that your son had specifically requested that for his teacher? I didn’t want you to sit there so you could do something for Me; I wanted you to sit there so I could do something for you.”

I was speechless.

God put me at that table for no other reason than that He simply wanted to bless me!

I wonder how many times we rob God of an opportunity to bless us simply because we aren’t obedient in all things regardless of how small they may seem. Many of us only make sure that God is involved in our major decisions, but God is waiting to give you your own red flower and packet of sunflower seeds if you’ll simply invite Him to be a part of your daily small decisions. ó

Women Helping Women Catching the Heart of Service The Women’s Ministry has several opportunities for you to serve our Gateway family. Beginning this spring, we’ll be offering a monthly outreach.

Come be blessed by blessing the lives of others.

To get involved or for more information, contact Melissa Terry at 817.552.3756 or email Womenn2Action@gatewaypeople.com.

Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows ….

James 1:27 (NLT)

Spring 2007 23

Let’s Talk

W

ithin the course of life, all of us suffer through tragedies.

While some stories may be more tragic than others, in the end they are all painful. Sometimes events from our past are so horrific or painful they fill us with shame. We just want to forget about them, and we hope others will too. We push them down, sweep them under the rug, don’t ever talk about them and definitely don’t let anyone else talk about them either.

However, this only works for a season.

Have you ever noticed that you can pull a weed from your lawn or flower garden and a few days later two more show up in the exact same spot! Unless you remove the weed’s entire root, it will keep sprouting its ugly head all over your lawn or garden until you wake up one day and

Cindy Kelley

verbally and physically abuse our mother, and his abuse didn’t stop with her. When I was four, my five-year-old sister and I watched from several feet away as our dad murdered our mom by shooting her two times in the chest and once in the neck. Then our dad turned the gun to his head and ended his own life. And the tragedies didn’t end there. When I was 16, one of my brothers committed suicide, and later at the age of 26, another brother committed suicide.

The real struggle began when we all started trying to piece our

You turned my wailing into dancing; You removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to You and not be silent.

O Lord my God, I will give You thanks forever!

Psalm 30:11–12 (NIV) realize that the weeds have taken over and choked the life from your grass and flowers. In the same way, when we don’t face our past and instead choose to live in denial or shame, we stop growing. Denial and shame hinder us from the freedom of God’s healing in our lives, and not dealing with the past sets us up for a cycle of negative behaviors that are spiritually, emotionally and physically damaging.

At the age of 36, I found myself in the situation of having to confront the past before it destroyed my marriage, my family and me. As the youngest of fourteen children, my siblings and I spent several years watching our dad 24 Studio G

lives back together.

My siblings and I suffered a great loss, and we never fully grieved the loss of our parents. We didn’t have any counseling or discussions; we only had uncared wounds left in our hearts. My siblings and friends often told me I was blessed because I only had to live through four short years of this, but I never really felt blessed. I never shared this with anyone because I didn’t want it to seem like I was ungrateful or that I didn’t empathize

studio solutions for the soul

Gateway Groups for Women: Our Stories Webster’s broadest definition of a legacy is “something transmitted by or received from an ancestor or predecessor or from the past.” That’s fairly all-inclusive of history, culture, education, every item in every museum as well as your grandmother’s quilt! Interestingly, the word legacy is never used in the Bible. Instead, the Bible talks about the general idea of leaving a legacy through the use of other things such as memories and inheritances.

One possible way by which you can choose to leave your legacy is through the hobby of scrapbooking. About a year ago, Lisa Corley started a Gateway Group for people who have a shared interest in scrapbooking. I now lead the group, and during our meetings, we organize photos, share inspirations and design ideas, create page layouts, journal and complete albums with pages of our history in the making.

Every scrapbook member puts together their own album in a unique fashion. We have women from each end of the creative spectrum and everywhere in between. Some design each page to the tee using the latest and greatest techniques and tools. Other members don’t use any decorations or embellishments, preferring to focus more on journaling the story behind the pictures. You will also find those who choose to use a combined approach of journaling and decoration, while some just like to place their photos in store-bought albums. No matter what your approach is, this group offers great fellowship with like-minded people.

Whether you call your hobby scrapbooking, faithbooking, legacybooking or just “getting those pictures into an album,” our Gateway Group is one of the most enjoyable ways to obey God’s command to remember what He’s done for us (Psalm 78:4). If you’ve been looking for a way to connect within Gateway, come and join us because we definitely have a place for you.

~Allie Martin, Scrapbooking Group Leader

with the others who had endured more than me. I suffered through long spells of deep sadness and loneliness and went about questioning my purpose and reason for living.

When I became a married adult with children, other destructive behavior began to surface. The weeds were choking the life out of me. I knew I needed help, but since no one in my family really wanted to talk about it, I figured that I would just help myself. It wasn’t until I wrapped my mind around the fact that I did have a painful past that true healing could begin. I realized that I needed to share my pain with someone I trusted who would pray for me, lift me up, encourage me and challenge me. As I began to get to the root of my negative responses to my life and my relationships, I was able to identify the source of where it all began.

I’m on a new journey now and am thankful to God for each day. As I daily make steps towards healing, it feels so incredibly free to realize that my heavenly Father loves me unconditionally, will always care for me and will never harm me. We were all given the most beautiful picture of a true father when God sent His Son to die for us. Even when our earthly fathers fail us, we can always rely on our true Father. Because there is no condemnation in Christ, I can make choices based on who I am in Him! As a result, I am now able to leave a godly legacy for my children and for generations to come.

If you identify with anything that I’ve shared, I want you to know that you’re not alone. There is help and hope for you today!

Allow God to place His loving arms around you. ó

If you need to talk, we’re here to listen. Gateway Church wants to walk beside you through the difficult times in your life. Our Freedom Ministry offers help to all who wish to experience the kind of freedom and healing mentioned in this article. For more information about Freedom Ministry, contact Marianne Kalush at 817.552.3634 or email freedom@gatewaypeople.com.

In addition, please consider joining a Gateway Group for women to build intimate relationships with other women. Counseling is also available.

For more information about Gateway Groups for women, contact Katy Byrne at 817.552.3705 or email womensgroups@gatewaypeople.com.

Spring 2007 25

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.

I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:11b–13 (NIV)

T LIVING GRATEFULLY Judy Brisky

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he opposite of a thankful heart is a whining and complaining heart. When we whine and complain, we’re saying to God, “Excuse me, but You’ve made a big mistake. I’m not supposed to be in this predicament. So come on and let’s get it right.” Is this what a grateful heart should sound like? No, of course not! The apostle Paul wrote, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6–7, NIV). Paul’s secret for weathering the storms of life with contentment was simply praying with thanksgiving and living life with a grateful heart.

It’s not easy, however, to be grateful when things are desperate. I know from personal experience how difficult it is to be thankful in every situation. Our family will soon celebrate the third birthday of our daughter, Danielle, and in as many years, she won’t be with us to blow out the candles on her cake. We won’t be able to see her precious face as we sing “Happy Birthday,” because Danielle went to be with

studio solutions for the soul

the Father when she was only two months and six days old. All of her birthday celebrations are now held in heaven, and I’m sure it’s quite a party! Meanwhile here on earth, we still continue celebrating her life and rejoicing in the fact that she changed our world for the better. I know that my life will never be the same; I have been forever changed.

During this difficult time, being thankful and content took on a whole new meaning. While the pain of losing our baby girl was unbearable at times, we were truly grateful that we didn’t have to walk through this alone. Our heavenly Father was with us every step of every single day. Even during the bleakest time of our lives, we saw God’s goodness and faithfulness, and we were grateful. The Lord carried us through and brought us to a place where we could rest in Him and learn that His grace is more than sufficient.

We don’t see the whole picture from beginning to end; we can only see bits and pieces. However, God is sovereign, and He sees the whole picture. Not only does He know our pains and frustrations, He also understands them. His desire for us is to be content with what we have and where He has placed us. With every situation, there is something to be learned and something that can bring us closer to the heart of God. When we go through difficult times and don’t try to go around them, He teaches us and assures us that He will never leave us or forsake us.

I’ll admit, sometimes I wish the learning didn’t take so long, but I know God’s timing is perfect. With His help, I’ll continue to foster a grateful attitude in my heart. And when it’s hard to find something to be thankful for in the midst of a tough time, I will remember my Savior and thank Him for all He has already done in my life. ó

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 (NIV)

Add Joy to Your Daily Life ÀÀ Pay as much attention to the things that are working positively in your life as you do to those that are giving you trouble. ÀÀ Rake a big pile of leaves every fall, and jump in it with someone you love. ÀÀ Memorize your favorite love poem. ÀÀ Learn three knock-knock jokes so you will always be ready to entertain children. ÀÀ Don’t let weeds grow around your dreams. ÀÀ Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something and has lost something. ÀÀ Regardless of the situation, react with class. ÀÀ Let some things remain mysterious.

Taken from Life’s Little Instruction Book: A Few More Suggestions, Observations and Remarks on how to Live a Happy and Rewarding Life, Volume 2 by H. Jackson Brown, Jr. (Rutledge Hill Press).

Therefore, since we have been made right in God’s sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us.

Romans 5:1 (NLT)

Spring 2007 27

PERCEIVED

LOVE Carin Prickett

A

s parents, we often have to deal with problems in our children’s lives head-on. We discipline them, and then point them in the right direction. When our son was five years old, he began to have problems with telling the truth. This was very bothersome to me, because it wasn’t just limited to the big things; he also lied about little things that didn’t even matter. Of course, like many young moms, I would overreact. I tried to fix him myself. I spanked him, and when that didn’t work, I tried timeouts. But it was all to no avail.

As I prayed during my quiet time that day, I asked God, “What is wrong with this kid?” At first, there was

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only silence. Then, God began to help me understand that the problem wasn’t with Jonathan but with me. As only He can, God began to show me that the problem behind Jonathan’s lying was his perception of my love for him. God gently reminded me that it’s His goodness that brings us to repentance (Romans 2:4). While repentance may seem like a complicated churchy word, it simply refers to the place where we realize we’re doing wrong, admit it, leave it and go in the opposite direction.

God said to me, “The love Jonathan perceives coming from you isn’t big enough to handle what he’s done wrong.

You need to deposit more love in his ‘love bank’ in order for him to come to you.” Then the Lord gave me the most unusual prompting, “The next time he lies to you, ask him to come sit with you. Then simply hold him, scratch his back and tell him how much you love him.”

I soon had my chance to obey God’s prompting when several items went missing from my daughter Whitney’s room. I asked my son if he knew anything about this, and he assured me in his five-year-old way that he knew nothing about the missing items. Later that week, as I was cleaning Jonathan’s closet, I came across a small shoebox behind the door. When I opened the box and beheld its contents, I discovered all the missing items from Whitney’s room!

Jonathan had lied again. So I took a deep breath and went to look for him. After finding him downstairs playing with his toys, I asked him to sit with me. As I began to stroke his back and love on him, he melted, began to cry and confessed to everything. Of course, being the great woman of faith that I am, I was shocked that what God had prompted me to do actually worked!

Even though the Bible tells us to discipline our children, the path to that discipline is as varied as the children themselves. Yes, the path will always stay within the parameters of God’s Word, but we are called to walk daily hearing His voice. That day, I learned that God wants us to follow Him in our lives. In addition, I learned how important love is and that it’s not just about having it; it’s also about expressing it.

When our children make poor choices, we want them to come to us. And after that time with Jonathan, God began to show me just how important expressing love is. As Jonathan grew, our love became established in his life. God developed such a love in him that he couldn’t help but come to us. When he was in high school and he gave into peer pressure, Jonathan would come into our room late at night and spill his guts. As we greeted him with the love of God and helped him get back on course, his heart was moved towards repentance. Even though our son isn’t perfect, he has learned a lesson valuable to us all. When we fall down, if we run to God, He will greet us with love, forgive us, help us to deal with the mess we made and get us back on course while loving us the whole time. ó

“For your Maker is your husband— the Lord Almighty is His name—the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; He is called the God of all the earth.”

Isaiah 54:5 (NIV)

We Want to Hear From You! Do you have questions or comments about Studio G? Let us know what you think.

Email us at studiog@gatewaypeople.com or write to: Studio G, 2121 E Southlake Blvd, Southlake, TX 76092. Letters may be edited for clarity and length.

Gateway Groups for Women: Our Stories In the past, I would have never used the word “leader” to describe myself. All the leaders I knew were outgoing and talkative, and I didn’t like to talk much, especially in front of a group of people. I was content with not being a leader. Several years ago when my husband was the senior pastor of a church in west Texas, he asked me if I would lead a women’s small group.

At first I thought he was joking because he knew I didn’t talk a lot; plus, my knowledge of the Bible wasn’t what I thought it should be to lead a Bible study. When I answered with a quick “No,” he said, “Just pray about it.” I agreed, and that’s when God began pursuing me. He reminded me of how Moses told Him: “O Lord, I’m just not a good speaker. I never have been.”

In response, the Lord said, “Go, I will help you speak” (Exodus 4:10–12).

So, I listened to the Lord, stepped out and allowed Him to teach me how to lead. I learned that I didn’t need to be a Bible scholar or have an outgoing personality to be a good leader. All I needed to do was to love people, and God would do the rest. I can honestly tell you that I love being a Gateway Group leader. It’s truly a delight to serve in this area! Because I took such a personally huge risk, I’ve learned so much about myself. I discovered there was something in me God created that was waiting to be released. It was a wonderful revelation that true leadership is just loving people. I get the privilege to minister God’s love and grace. I could never do it without Him. He has built my confidence to levels I never dreamed of. All I had to be was a willing vessel. If you are a willing vessel, I encourage you to take that first step and ask the Lord if you should be the leader of a Gateway Group for women. He may just surprise you with His answer.

~Pam Boyd, Women’s Group Leader If you’re interested in joining a Gateway Group for women or becoming a leader, contact Katy Byrne at 817.552.3705 or email womensgroups@gatewaypeople.com.

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Confessions of a Diehard Listmaker Nancy Dotti

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confess—I am a diehard listmaker! There, I said it. I don’t admit to it often, but there is a certain joy in writing a list and crossing off those items one by one throughout the day. Sometimes I write something down just so I can cross it off. Thanks to my husband, I’ve even entered into the realm of electronic lists.

(But, I must admit I still resort to those paper lists that are much more satisfying!)

What should a diehard listmaker do when there are too many things “to do” on her list? The options are many:

¸Panic and stay in bed. ¸“Accidentally” lose the list. ¸Go through the list, and put off all the difficult things to do until next week. it off as a badge of honor (like “look at what I have to do tomorrow”) and ¸Show then panic.

When your list of things to do outlasts your day, what should you do? My first response to such an overflowing list is to follow the instruction of an old English proverb: “Do the next thing.” This small piece of literary advice helps my brain to function when my list is long and overwhelming. But although this advice can help 30 Studio G

to reduce panic, it still doesn’t address the issue of long-term help. All too often, we’re so put off by the immensity of our tasks that we get paralyzed and begin to doodle our time away thinking that we’ll never accomplish anything.

This begs the question: “Why try?” Or perhaps the opposite is true. Maybe the assignments of your day seem so overwhelming that you think you have to put off all other thoughts, people, enjoyments and other niceties just to put your nose to the grindstone and work, work, work. I’ve gone to both extremes, and trust me, neither is a good choice.

In the book of Proverbs, the Lord gives us good counsel to consider about our lists: “A man’s mind plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps and makes them sure” (Proverbs 16:9, AMP). In other words, while your planning can be beneficial and help you accomplish your tasks, you must be mindful that the Lord controls your list—the list does not control you. Having a plan is prudent and wise, but you must remember to first give every day to the Lord. As you cry out to the Lord for help in all things, He will answer you and say: “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it’” (Isaiah 30:21, NIV).

Dedicate your day to the Lord.

Consult Him as you drive your kids to school, make endless phone calls or empty the dishwasher. Along the way, ask Him to direct and possibly change your plans. Knowing that you’ve asked Him to direct your steps, you may even get more done than you expected and have more peace in the process.

And while you’re following the Lord and listening for Him, you can always do the next thing so that you don’t get overwhelmed with your day. One thing at a time, dedicated to Him. That’s the recipe for a peaceful and productive day!

Good. Now I can cross off “Need to Finish an Article for Studio G” from my “to do” list! ó

studio solutions for the soul

SPRINGTIME SYMBOLIZES THE BEGINNING OF NEW LIFE. TAKE THE TIME TO STOP FOR A MOMENT TODAY AND ASK YOURSELF THE QUESTION, “WHO AM I IN CHRIST?” Long before He laid down earth’s foundations, He had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of His love, to be made whole and holy by His love.

Ephesians 1:5 (MSG)

So you also are complete through your union with Christ.

Colossians 2:10a (NLT)

“You shall be witnesses to Me.” Acts 1:8 (NKJV)

So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive His mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.

Hebrews 4:16 (NLT)

God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God. 2 Corinthians 5:21 (NIV)

And I am convinced and sure of this very thing, that He Who began a good work in you will continue until the day of Jesus Christ [right up to the time of His return], developing [that good work] and perfecting and bringing it to full completion in you.

Philippians 1:6 (AMP)

BEGIN ANEW IN YOUR VIEW OF WHO YOU REALLY ARE IN HIM.

studio smile

lol :)

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ne Sunday afternoon, I took a shopping trip with my two sisters to a wellknown local department store. When we arrived, we established a meeting place and then split up in order to divide and conquer. I began searching for the perfect little top to wear to a dinner that evening. I eventually found some choices and took them into the dressing room for a more thorough look. One top in particular was fitted with a zipper down the side (this should have been my first warning sign). It took a little wiggling and contorting to get the top on, but I finally succeeded. After all that work, I looked in the mirror only to discover that it wasn’t flattering at all. At that point, I proceeded to take the top off, and that is where I ran into trouble. I had pulled the top over my head with my arms stuck straight up above me when I realized, oh no, I was stuck! This top wasn’t going anywhere! I began panicking, wondering what in the world was I going to do. My circulation was being cut off in my arms where the too-tight top was constricting my blood flow. I remembered that I had my cell phone, so I somehow dug it out with my arms still stuck above my head and called one of my sisters. Hearing the distress in my voice, she thought something serious had happened. I told her that I needed her to meet me in the dressing room because I was stuck in a blouse that obviously didn’t fit. Amused with my situation, my sister came to my

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y family and I had recently moved to the city from the country when my five-year-old son came running as fast as he could up the driveway. I watched as he ran towards me smiling from ear to ear with red cheeks and eyes bright with excitement. “Mommy, Mommy,” he cried, gasping for air. “Guess what? The neighbors just bought new big cows.”

“Wow that’s exciting,” I said. “But how do you know they are new?” He looked up with all the enthusiasm and sincerity of a five-year-old and proudly announced, “Because they still have their price tags in their ears.” I roughed his hair and smiled to myself. Yes, we had definitely been in the city too long. ~Sandra Carey

rescue of course. When she walked into the hall of dressing rooms, she was laughing so hard she could barely call out my name. I had to somehow maneuver my way into opening the door for her, and she just stood there for a good 30 seconds and laughed at

my calamity. For the rest of the day and evening, I had awful red marks on my arm from the less-than-flattering top. Needless to say, that is the last time I will try manipulating my way into any piece of clothing! ~Katy Byrne

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he pastor at the small community church where I grew up was a gifted teacher who always gave in-depth studies and explained with simple illustrations. He backed everything up with Scripture and taught us how to apply it to our lives. On one particular Sunday morning, he began to teach us about being grafted into the vine of God. As he told parable-like stories about plants and how God tends to us like a garden, we were all listening intently. Then he attempted to relate one of his points to the process of cross-pollination. However, instead of saying cross-pollination, he said “artificial insemination!”

The moment was completely lost!

The congregation laughed so hard and so long that he never could regain control.

He dismissed the service by simply saying, “Laughter is good like medicine, so at least we got something out of this morning’s meeting!” ~Kisha Thomson

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arly one Sunday morning, I started getting ready for church (in a hurry, of course).

After getting decked out in my black pantsuit and accessories, I was feeling good.

What’s more, I was having a good hair day as well! I arrived at church, hurriedly rushed my daughter to class and made it into the Auditorium just in time for worship. While worshipping, I told my friend next to me that I felt like the floor was on an incline and maybe I needed to move to a place where the floor was more level. My friend looked down and began to laugh. I had on two completely different shoes: a brown and cream Espedrille and a black wedge shoe! I looked ridiculous, and I was so embarrassed.

The couple next to me even started laughing. Needless to say, I don’t put my shoes on in a hurry anymore! ~Amber Rhoads

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hen my favorite cousin, Billy, was about six years old, we noticed that he squinted a lot when trying to read. Even his teachers suggested that he should have his eyes examined to see if he needed to wear glasses.

He used to come visit us quite often, and there was an optical shop right around the corner from our apartment building in Hong Kong. So when we passed by the shop, we told him that we should take him to get an eye exam. Crying and screaming, he refused to go inside to see the optician. This happened a few times. Then a couple of months later, the struggle of having to read things from a distance started bothering him. So, Billy reluctantly agreed to go have his eyes examined. After the eye exam, we found out that he was near-sighted and ordered glasses for him. As we were leaving the optical shop, Billy was skipping joyfully and celebrating the fun time he had just had at the eye exam. I couldn’t help but ask, “Billy, why were you so terrified to go to the optical shop before?” He answered, “Oh, that was because I thought the optician would actually have to take my eyeballs out and examine them, and I knew that would be so painful!” ~Elena Glassman

You could have your own funny story featured in Studio G! Simply email it to lol@gatewaypeople.com.

UPCOMING EVENTS FEBRUARY 26–28 Connect Conference MARCH

2 Messianic Service

9–10 Prayer Seminar 22 Women’s Outreach

23 Fruitful Families Conference APRIL

2 Passover Celebration

4 Women’s Outreach

6 Messianic Service

8 Easter

18–24 Global Ministries Trip for Women MAY

4 Messianic Service 22 Women’s Night

26 Women’s Outreach

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studio pulse

Book & Music Reviews FOR WOMEN ONLY: WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THE INNER LIVES OF MEN

by Shaunti Feldhahn What’s going on in a man’s mind? From their early days, every woman has struggled to understand why males behave the way they do. Beneath a man’s rugged exterior is an even more rugged, unmapped terrain.

What bestselling author Shaunti Feldhahn’s research reveals about the inner lives of men will open women’s eyes to what the men in their life—boyfriends, brothers, husbands and sons—are really thinking and feeling. Men want to be understood, but they’re afraid to “freak out” the women they love by confessing what’s happening inside their heads.

This book will guide women in how to provide the loving support that modern men want and need.

ALSO RECOMMENDED: For Young Women Only: What You Need to Know About How Guys Think

by Shaunti Feldhahn and Lisa A. Rice For Men Only: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women

by Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn

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SING OVER ME: WORSHIP SONGS AND LULLABIES Various Artists Parents love to sing to their children. Whether it’s fun songs, lullabies or worship songs, music plays a vital part in the relationship between parent and child. Sing Over Me: Worship Songs and Lullabies combines some of the best-known worship songs along with the best female voices in contemporary Christian music today: Bethany Dillon, Janna Long (Avalon), Christy Nockels (Watermark), Nichole Nordeman and Erin O’Donnell. Intentionally recorded to be a soothing listening experience, parents can sing these songs to their children, use for personal worship time and reflection or play in the car for the drive home. Produced by 2006 Dove Award-winning Producer of the Year, Ed Cash (Chris Tomlin), Sing Over Me will inspire wonderfully wornout parents and sleepy children alike to worship and rest with its peaceful arrangements and heartfelt vocals.

REDEEMING LOVE

by Francine Rivers Although this book was written about fifteen years ago, the story told in Redeeming Love is timeless.

In this splendid retelling of the biblical story of Hosea, bestselling author Francine Rivers pens a heartbreaking romance between a prostitute and the upright and kind farmer who marries her; the story also functions as a reminder of God’s unconditional love for His people. Redeeming Love opens with the Gold Rush of 1850 and its rough-and-tumble atmosphere of greed and desire. Angel, who was sold into prostitution as a child, has learned to distrust all men, who see her only as a way to satisfy their lust. When the virtuous and spiritual-minded Michael Hosea is told by God to marry this “soiled dove,” he obeys, despite his misgivings. As Angel learns to love him, she begins to hope again but is soon overwhelmed by fear and returns to her old life. In Redeeming Love, Rivers shines in her ability to weave together spiritual themes and plot tension in a well-told story that will captivate, challenge and inspire you.

What’s Playing in Thomas Miller’s Ear: MIGHTY TO SAVE (HILLSONG) For more than 10 years, Hillsong has inspired individuals and churches worldwide to praise and worship our God and to bring Him glory. The latest live worship album to come out of Hillsong Church is Mighty To Save. Led by Darlene Zschech and the Hillsong worship team, over 10,000 worshippers sang, danced and declared God’s power on one unforgettable night of worship. Mighty To Save, captures the excitement from that night at the Sydney Entertainment Centre in one seamless, powerful recording you simply must hear!

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hen we love a person, we accept him or her exactly as is: the lovely with the unlovely, the strong with the fearful, the true mixed in with the façade, and of course, the only way we can do it is by accepting ourselves that way.

Mister (Fred) Rogers

SUCCESS SUPPOSES ENDEAVOR. Jane Austen

No one has a right to consume happiness without producing it.

Helen Keller

WORD OF GOD SPEAK SERIES—HOPE, ILLUMINATE AND SHELTER (INTEGRITY MUSIC) In today’s hectic world, we could all use an easy way to get scriptures firmly planted in our hearts. When God speaks through the Bible, hearts are touched and lives are transformed. Produced by Nathan Nockels (Watermark; Passion; Phillips, Craig & Dean), Word of God Speak is a collection of exact word-for-word scriptures perfectly coupled with new modern worship music that is extremely relevant to a wide range of consumers. The power of God’s inspired Word is contained in each and every song and the promises of the Scriptures come alive as the Word of God speaks to each of us.

A COLLISION (DAVID CROWDER* BAND) The third full-length studio album from the David Crowder* Band once again offers their unique brand of rockin’ acoustic worship, laced with vertical lyrics and positive attitude. A Collision is a multifaceted and interwoven tale of the mystery and beauty of that instant when the divinity of God smacks head-on into the depravity of man. More than a collection of songs, the album is a musical journey, inviting the listener to consider and celebrate what God has done. An unfolding story told in four segments and 21 tracks, A Collision is vintage Crowder, while reaching still for new heights of worship.

Anything will give up its secrets if you love it enough.

George Washington Carver

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he world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do.

Sarah Ban Breathnach

There shall be Eternal summer in the grateful heart.

Celia Thaxter

FRIENDSHIPS MULTIPLY JOYS AND DIVIDE GRIEFS. Thomas Fuller

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Please pray for us!

s e i r t s i n i M l a b o l G n e m o W Trip for o c i x e M , o t a u j a n a u G 7 0 0 2 , 4 2 April 18-

If you would like more information about upcoming Global Ministry Trips for Women, please contact Melissa Terry at 817.552.3756 or email trips4women@gatewaypeople.com.