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THE INDEPENDENT NEWSPAPER OF WASHINGTON UNIVERSIT Y IN ST. LOUIS SINCE 1878 Sadly, the men’s basketball team has ended their season with a loss and a failure to win an NCAA at-large bid. Read more in Sports. Page 5.

Harvard president Larry Summers, Mardi Gras debauchery, course listings, Darfur, and more, all in today’s Forum. Page 6.

VOLUME 127, NO. 59

Geometry Wars: How can a $5 title from Xbox Live compete with $60 games? Jordan Deam explains in today’s Cadenza. Page 8.

It’s that time of year again— Cadenza makes their 2006 Oscar picks. See Page 10.

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 1, 2006

CHEMICAL REACTION CAUSES FIRE IN LAB SCIENCES

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LGBTIQAA task force to present concerns to WU v Committee preparing suggestions for safety,

diversity and campus life to shape University policy

By Kristin McGrath Senior News Editor The newly formed task force that represents the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, intersex, questioning, asexual, and allies (LGBTIQA A) community will take its first steps in shaping future University resources at the end of April.

After meeting weekly this semester, the task force has formed subgroups to investigate five main issues to present to Dean of Arts & Sciences James McLeod.

The task force, which is composed of faculty, administrators, and students, was formed in January in response to a reso-

lution passed last year by the Student Union (SU) Senate to create a resource center to serve students of alternate orientations and lifestyles.

The first subgroup will address the appointment of a person who would serve as coordinator for LGBTIQA A issues, said Professor of Anthropology T.R. Kidder, who heads the task force.

“We’re dealing with questions now such as where physically [the coordinator] would be housed and to whom they would report,” said Kidder. “The idea we’re wrestling with now is if this is something we’d want to recommend.”

The second issue involves providing a safe en-

vironment for LGBTIQA A students. One of the task force’s subgroups is currently investigating the safety concerns of members of the Washington University community and the existing policies of the Washington University Police Department (W UPD), Student Health and Counseling Services, and Residential Life (ResLife) that affect students’ safety.

“One of our concerns is how can we make this a safer campus,” said Kidder.

“There have been incidents on campus that people feel have been threatening. I don’t know to what extent these [incidents] are real or perceived or what the

See LGBTIQAA, page 3

New vice chancellor of research appointed

By Josh Hantz Associate Reporter

DAVID BRODY | STUDENT LIFE

The Lab Sciences building was evacuated on Monday at 4 p.m. when an organic chemical on a hot plate boiled over under a fuel hood, causing a minor explosion. The incident, which took place in lab 130b, involved the chemical dicyclopentadiene, according to professor Thomas Vaid, who teaches Inorganic Chemistry.

“These kind of things can happen when you do synthesis in the lab,” said Vaid. “The TA closed the fuel hood and evacuated the students. A member of the chemistry department came in with a fire extinguisher.

The TA acted commendably. And students went back in and finished their reactions afterward.”

According to Washington University Chief of Police Don Strom, there were no injuries and no major damage. After environmental checks were performed by the fire department, the building was reopened at 4:30 p.m.

Department of Molecular Microbiology Professor Samuel Stanley is slated to become Washington University’s next vice chancellor of research.

Effective July 1, 2006, Stanley will replace Theodore Cicero, who resigned after holding the position since 1996.

Stanley predicts the transition will be smooth because of Cicero’s previous work.

“Ted [Cicero] did a remarkable job,” said Stan-

ley. “He set up a great infrastructure. It’s very nice to come into a job where someone else has already done a good job. It also creates an opportunity to build on things he has done and expand.”

As vice chancellor of research, Stanley will have a few major goals to achieve.

One is to coordinate more efficiently across Forest Park between the main campus and the medical school. Collaboration will put them in a better position to apply for big programs. The other is to make sure the University

conducts research appropriately.

“I want people conducting research responsibly,” said Stanley. “It’s really an educational process. It hasn’t been a major issue but we certainly do have some problems and most of the time it’s because people don’t know the rules. I want to increase education so that they understand what they have to do.”

His other responsibilities as vice chancellor will include continuing facul-

See STANLEY, page 2

Longer, harder GRE delayed by one year

By Elizabeth Lewis Staff Reporter The launch date for the new form of the Graduate Record Examinations that was originally to be released in October 2006 is being postponed until the fall of 2007.

“ETS [the maker of the GRE] was not able to logistically have the new exam ready for the October launch,” said Matt Fider, the GRE program manager for Kaplan Test Prep and Admissions. “They were not able to get enough seats to manage the volume.”

Changes in the test, which is required for most graduate-level programs, will be significant, perhaps the most drastic in the test’s 55 year history.

Other changes include an increase in the length of exam time from two-and-ahalf hours to four hours, an increase in the price of taking the exam, and revised content in all three sections (Verbal, Analytical Writing, and Quantitative). Additionally, the test will now be offered on 30 fixed dates throughout the year, instead of being offered six days per week as it is currently.

“I am surprised by [the de-

lay]. They have been aware of the desirability of changing the test for quite some time,” said Robert Thach, the dean of the University’s Graduate School of Arts & Sciences.

ETS had being considering changing the test when Thach was on its board, between 1998 and 2003.

Fidler thinks the postponement is for the best.

“It can be viewed as good news that the change is going to be pushed off for a year because more students can take the old exam,” said Fidler. “It provides choice.

This year’s seniors will take the old exam. Juniors and even sophomores have a choice. Previously, they would have been forced.”

One of the main changes to the test is that it will become more writing intensive.

Instead of simply answering questions about the strength of an argument, test takers will have to complete two writing exercises in an Analytical Writing Assessment. The first exercise is a 45-minute essay in which the writer must express an opinion about an issue of general interest. The second is a 30-minute written analysis about the strength of an argument.

“The reason for the change is to make sure that the test accurately predicts critical thinking and complex reasoning. [These skills] are needed across all disciplines,” said Fidler.

Thach thinks that the changes could be positive for some areas.

“Engineering programs want a quantitative test that relies on the knowledge of calculus,” said Thach. “The current quantitative test does not.”

Thach added that the deans in the engineering school have expressed an interest in the new GRE test.

He does not think that the changes are essential, however.

“I would have to be convinced,” he said.

Thach also does not believe that the longer and perhaps more challenging test will increase the caliber of graduate students at Washington University.

“Why would it matter?

[The University] gets an excellent caliber of students anyway,” said Thach. “The changes would not necessarily make Washington University more attractive with applicants.”

The test will probably not

DAVID BRODY | STUDENT LIFE

make the already daunting task of getting into graduate school more difficult, said Fidler.

“Students must realize that, starting next fall, everyone has to take the exam.

The scale will adjust accordingly,” said Fidler.

But he warns that with the test change, some schools will alter how they do admissions.

“Students should talk to their target schools to understand how they will interpret and implement the changes in the test,” says

Fidler.

Fidler recommended that, in the meantime, students should take the older GRE while they still can.

“The scores are good for five years,” said Fidler. “Take it especially as a senior to get it out of the way.”

2 STUDENT LIFE | NEWS

STUDENT LIFE One Brookings Drive #1039 #42 Women’s Building Saint Louis, MO 63130-4899 News: (314) 935-5995 Advertising: (314) 935-6713 Fax: (314) 935-5938 email: editor@studlife.com www.studlife.com Copyright 2006 Editor in Chief: Margaret Bauer Associate Editor: Liz Neukirch Managing Editor: David Tabor Senior News Editor: Kristin McGrath Senior Forum Editor: Molly Antos Senior Cadenza Editor: Laura Vilines Senior Scene Editor: Sarah Baicker Senior Sports Editor: Justin Davidson Senior Photo Editor: David Brody News Editors: Mandy Silver, Caroline Wekselbaum Forum Editors: Daniel Milstein, Jeff Stepp, Matt Shapiro, Joshua Trein Cadenza Editors: Adam Summerville, Jordan Deam, Robbie Gross Scene Editors: Sarah Klein, Erin Fults Sports Editor:Joe Ciolli Photo Editors: David Hartstein, Pam Buzzetta, Meghan Luecke Online Editor: Dan Daranciang Design Chief: Laura McLean Copy Editors: Allie McKay, Nina Perlman, Kelly Donahue, Erin Fults, Rebecca Emshwiller, hannah draper, Julian Beattie, Mallory Wilder, Paige Creo Designers: Ellen Lo, Anna Dinndorf, Jamie Reed, Andy Gavinski, Elizabeth Kaufman, Kate Ehrlich General Manager: Andrew O’Dell Advertising Manager: Sara Judd Copyright 2006 Washington University Student Media, Inc. (WUSMI). Student Life is the financially and editorially independent, student-run newspaper serving the Washington University community. First copy of each publication is free; all additional copies are 50 cents. Subscriptions may be purchased for $80.00 by calling (314) 935-6713.

Student Life is a publication of WUSMI and does not necessarily represent, in whole or in part, the views of the Washington University administration, faculty or students. All Student Life articles, photos and graphics are the property of WUSMI and may not be reproduced or published without the express written consent of the General Manager. Pictures and graphics printed in Student Life are available for purchase; e-mail editor@ studlife.com for more information. Student Life reserves the right to edit all submissions for style, grammar, length and accuracy. The intent of submissions will not be altered. Student Life reserves the right not to publish all submissions.

Senior News Editor / Kristin McGrath / news@studlife.com

STANLEY v FROM PAGE 1 ty education, dealing with cases of conf lict-of-interest, research integrity and intellectual property, and managing grants and contracts.

With the new responsibility, however, Stanley will have to reduce his time commitment to past jobs, lecturing medical students and seeing patients.

“I don’t want to shortchange people,” said Stanley. “I have mixed feelings about it, but I hopefully can do more good in this position.”

Stanley began his career at the University in 1983 when he started a fellowship in infectious diseases at the medical school. In 1999 he became a professor

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research and exof medicine and, pand opportunities. in 2004, a profesWith his past exsor in the Departperience, he began ment of Molecular implementing these Microbiology.

But plans, especially he only recently bethrough funding. came interested in “I had the chance the position of vice to administer very chancellor.

Samuel Stanley large grants,” said “This particuStanley. “I worked lar position was not necessarily what I had with a lot of faculty and planned for,” he said. “Work- helped bring them togething with faculty is when I er, not just from Wash. U. I really became interested helped them work towards a common goal.” about five years ago.”

The National Institute of His partnership with professors and his vision Health gave Stanley almost to develop research helped $37 million to create the Stanley down his current Midwest Regional Center path. As he became more in- for Excellence in Biodefense volved, he saw the need to and Emerging Infectious increase multidisciplinary Diseases Research based at

the University. The center explores methods of identifying and eliminating pathogens.

But the ability to handle funding and conduct research are not Stanley’s only strengths.

“I can identify where other people have strengths,” said Stanley. “Sometimes we’re not aware of things going on at the University.

But I’ve been able to set up partnerships and look for overlap. We now have a better understanding of what’s going on at the Danforth campus.”

The Seattle native first became interested in studying diseases, specifically tropical ones, when he went

to Indonesia, where he began learning about them.

After he returned and graduated from the University of Chicago, he earned his medical degree and completed his residency at the Harvard School of Medicine.

He then spent time at Schweitzer hospital in Gabon, Africa, mainly treating malaria patients.

“That started me on my research career,” he said Stanley. “I realized I could make a tremendous contribution.”

Now, as vice chancellor of research, Stanley said that he will continue to keep his lab open but will be around less often.

stolen was later found intact where the student had accidentally left it. Disposition: Unfounded.

VIOLATING UNIVERSITY POLICY—SOUTH 40 NEAR WOHL—Students found in possession of BB guns. Disposition: Referred to JA.

boulder which was stuck under the vehicle. Hartmann’s Towing called and removed vehicle from boulder. No injuries. Disposition: Cleared.

7:04 p.m. PROPERTY DAMAGE INSTITUTIONAL VANDALISM—WOHL CENTER— Glass door in Wohl center found broken by housekeeping. Time of crime between 5-7 p.m. Disposition: Pending.

Sunday, Feb. 26

POLICE BEAT Tuesday, Feb. 21 6:28 p.m. DAMAGED PROPERTY—PARKING LOT NO. 4—Bicyclist struck a vehicle with handle bars and left a dent. Disposition: Pending.

STEALING OVER $500, CREDIT CARD, FIREARMS—POLICE DEPARTMENT—Student reported that mail sent to her on at least two different occasions was never received.

Disposition: Pending.

Thursday, Feb. 23

Friday, Feb. 24

11:42 a.m. TAMPERING WITH COMPUTER DATA— EARTH & PLANETARY SCIENCES BUILDING—University computer was hacked and used for a phishing scam.

Computer removed from the network. Disposition: Investigation continuing.

8:31 a.m. AUTO ACCIDENT (ALL OTHERS)—PARKING LOT NO. 57—Vehicle found with a dent after being parked overnight. Disposition: Pending.

3:56 p.m. LARCENY-THEFT,

3:59 p.m.

LARCENYTHEFT, STEALING OVER $50 0 — M A L L L I N C K RO D T CENTER—Wallet reported

10:30 p.m. FIRE—PARKING LOT NO. 32—Dumpster fi re, no cause determined.

Disposition: Cleared.

Saturday, Feb. 25 6:15 p.m. JUDICIAL VIOLATION, KNOWINGLY

11:06 p.m. CHECK THE WELL-BEING—SMALL GROUP—Request to check on a student’s well-being. Disposition: Cleared.

Monday, Feb. 27

10:33 p.m. AUTO ACCIDENT (ALL OTHERS)—SOUTH 40 RESIDENCE AREA—Student attempted to drive around the South 40 bollards and hit a large landscape

4 p.m. FIRE—LAB SCIENCES BUILDING—Hood fi re in lab caused by chemical reaction. Disposition: Cleared.

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4:09 p.m. PROPERTY DAMAGE, INSTITUTIONAL VANDALISM—MCMILLAN HALL— Persons unknown damaged the bathroom wall with graffiti. Disposition: Pending.

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WEDNESDAY | MARCH 1, 2006

LGBTIQAA v FROM PAGE 1 level of threat was in these cases.”

Chief of Police Don Strom said that while the number of hate crimes targeting the LGBTIQA A community is small, incidents of violence do occur. Strom recalls one incident in late fall where two students had eggs thrown at them while walking along Snow Way Drive.

Although the leads were insufficient to follow up on the case, Strom said W UPD maintains a strong stance against such crimes. All W UPD officers are trained in hate crime investigation and several represented the department in a safe zone training in the fall.

“We are supportive of their efforts and want to broaden our knowledge base wherever we can,” said Strom. “We will certainly listen to any recommendations they [LGBTIQA A] present, and will try to implement them when applicable and appropriate.”

The third issue is the matter of finding effective ways to communicate with students about their concerns.

“We’re trying to do an assessment of campus life and culture,” said Kidder. “What are the concerns of members of the campus community, and how can we go about finding out more about who is concerned? How do we talk to and survey students?”

A fourth subgroup is investigating ways that the University can better accommodate and attract potential LGBTIQA A students through its marketing and through its orientation activities.

“I think our recommendation [to the University] will have to do with how the University markets itself [to potential students] in general,” said Kidder. “Whether GLBT issues are even mentioned and whether they should be—whether students giving tours address this as an issue so that when GLBT students apply, we know what kind of information they’ve gotten. The main question we’re asking ourselves is, ‘How are we perceived by potential students?’”

The duty of the fifth subgroup is to address the University’s current formal policies that affect LGBTIQA A issues and determine if these policies need to be changed. This task involves researching the policies and statements of ResLife, W UPD, and other University organizations “to advocate for inclusion of sex and gender issues in the policy language,” according to Kidder.

“We’re not trying to judge the University,” said Kidder.

“We simply want to make sure that, if there’s language that seems inappropriate, it be modified to be more inclusive.”

According to Jill Stratton, assistant dean of students and associate director of Residential Life, ResLife’s policies reflect the inclusiveness that the task force promotes. Before the creation of the task force, ResLife was responding to SU’s petition.

The issues that ResLife discussed with students centered mainly around housing.

“We’ve done a couple of things,” said Stratton. “With housing applications you can now identify as male, female, or transgender. We’ve been trying to be more proactive in putting our resources out there to meet the needs of the students.”

When the task force was created, Stratton requested to serve on it. That ResLife is represented on the board, she said, is imperative, as ResLife is central to many students’ experience at Washington University.

“For every first-year student, with the exception of commuter students, ResLife plays into almost every aspect of campus life,” said Stratton. “[The task force] is discussing safety issues and the idea of feeling comfortable where you live, which I feel is critical.”

For campus Rabbi Avi Katz Orlow, who serves the task force in the subgroup investigating University policy, making Washington University more accessible to the LGBTIQA A community

is vital.

“I realize how important this work is,” said Katz Orlow. “People have multiple identities. I’m invested in working so that Wash. U. is a safe space for everyone, for personal expression. I learned from these students.

They’ve made me passionate about what it means to experience freedom.”

Representing a religious organization, said Katz Orlow, involves “making sure there’s a place for spirituality and religion” but not imposing it on those the task force seeks to serve. Katz Orlow advises Keshet, an advocacy group for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered Jews.

“Since I work for Hillel, I bring a different lens to look at things because I have different resources. It’s not for me to say what it should or shouldn’t be. In Judaism a lot of people have felt that their lives have been shunned by the Jewish community. They feel like they had to choose between different identities.

I don’t think that’s a choice they have to make.”

Once the recommendations have been presented to the administration, Kidder hopes that “we can act on these recommendations very quickly.”

The long-term effectiveness of the task force’s work, however, will depend on continued efforts from those involved, said Vice Chancellor for Students Jill Carnaghi, who also serves on the task force.

“We’d like to have some concrete outcomes by end of spring semester, but knowing full well that to be effective, this task force or some similar group is going to need to continue to meet in subsequent semesters to keep this topic in forefront and to continue to affect the environment and campus culture in ways that aren’t just superficial,” said Carnaghi.

-With additional reporting by Mandy Silver and Ben Sales

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A R E Y O U READY?

The countdown begins March 30!

The Alumni Association commemorates the “Final 50” days on campus of the Class of 2006!

NOMINATE A “DAY TRACKER”! Suggest a friend for the honor of flipping one of the daily numbers on the “Countdown to Commencement” board in Bowles Plaza. We’ll make it a memorable moment.

HURRY!! Nominations close at midnight, MARCH 4! Fill out the form online at: finalfifty.wustl.edu SEND IN YOUR BEST WU PHOTO! You just might find it on the countdown board or the online version at finalfifty.wustl.edu finalfifty.wustl.edu.

Because this isn’t just a four year deal.

STUDENT LIFE | NEWS

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4 STUDENT LIFE | NEWS

Senior News Editor / Kristin McGrath / news@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | MARCH 1, 2006

New orientation directors aim for more student involvement

By Alison Curran Contributing Reporter Since Feb. 1, the Orientation Office at Washington University has been under new leadership. Director Danielle Bristow and Assistant Coordinator Michelle Mulhair, the new leaders of the organization, have pushed for a more studentcentered orientation program.

Bristow took over as the director of Orientation and Parents Weekend, replacing former director Bill Woodward. She served as an orientation director at other institutions before coming to

the University.

Among orientation program directors, Bristow is a nationally established figure, said Karen Levin Coburn, assistant vice chancellor for students.

As director, Bristow’s responsibilities include coordination of the freshmen orientation program, organization of Parents Weekend, compilation of the Bear Facts publication and upkeep of the Orientation Web site. Over the next couple of weeks, however, Bristow said she plans to spend much of her time trying to get to know people on campus.

“I really want to see what

the community wants,” said Bristow.

Bristow intends to explore the desires of the student and faculty communities and then do what she can to implement these changes, she said.

“We have a total open door policy,” said Bristow. She encouraged anyone with ideas about Orientation to stop by her office in the Women’s Building. “We are open to any suggestions,” she said.

A major goal of the Orientation Office this year is to improve the visibility of Student Orientation Ambassadors. These leaders are students responsible for

working with the freshmen orientation program to help welcome incoming students to the University. More than 60 students are currently involved.

Both Bristow and Mulhair hope to improve the presence of current students in the orientation program.

“Orientation Ambassadors are the first contacts new students have when they arrive on campus,” said Mulhair. “They play an important role in the transition process for freshmen.”

Mulhair encourages students to apply to be Orientation ambassadors.

“We want students to get

involved and see what a difference they can make,” said Mulhair.

The Orientation team hopes that students will view participation in Orientation as a contribution to Washington University’s legacy.

Students who have previously been involved with Orientation are looking forward to the new leadership’s emphasis on the importance of student involvement.

“Danielle and Michelle have so much energy,” said junior Patti Jo Jaiyeola. “The two of them together are so excited about everything and that makes others excited.”

Jaiyeola currently serves

Ohio University overwhelmed with cheating incidents

INTERNATIONAL EU launches plan to compete with MIT The European Union (EU) is about to release its plans for a rival to the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT), citing concerns that its academics are falling behind those of the United States, China and India. These worries stem from an EU report saying its nations won only 19 percent of Nobel Prizes given from 1994-2005 compared to 73 percent won from 1901-1950. This European Institute of Technology (EIT) still has uncertainties though, including where to build it and whether to make it a single university, a network of other European universities, or a center with an EIT brand. The plan is to be made public on Wednesday. Currently, U.S. schools own seven of the top 10 spots in London’s Times Higher Educational Supplement.

NATIONAL

Faculty at the University Students sue universities of New Orleans await for violation of freedom trailers and layoffs of speech Hundreds of faculty members Two Pennsylvania college students have fi led federal lawsuits against Pennsylvania State and Temple Universities for having speech codes that that they claim punish them for exercising their First Amendment rights. The Alliance Defense Fund, a Christian legal advocacy group, is representing the students. The students claim that their violations against these speech codes have resulted in delayed graduations and other retributions. A university spokesman said that Penn State does not have a speech code and that the University tries to protect the free speech rights of all of its students.

currently sleeping on office floors while awaiting the 489 trailers that the government failed to deliver are now in danger of being laid off. Last week, Chancellor Timothy P. Ryan announced that the University of New Orleans was facing a $15 million shortfall that would require it to lay off tenured professors and cut academic programs. The announcement has frustrated faculty who were encouraged by the university’s administration to return to the flood-damaged city. Four thousand of the university’s 11,800 students are also stranded, as the 400 trailers intended for them sit unused because of a disagreement between the contractor and the university.

The Washington University Board of Trustees is seeking two current sophomore or junior students to serve as the

2006-2007 Undergraduate Student Representatives to the Board of Trustees Applications available, Monday, March 6, 2006, The Mallinckrodt Information Desk, The Wohl Information Desk, Office of Student Activities The Residential Life Center, Lien House The Village Office For more information call Elizabeth Williams 935-4329 or EWilliams@wustl.edu

DEADLINE: 12:00 noon, Friday March 31, 2006

Forty-four possible cases of plagiarism, all by engineering graduate students, are being investigated at Ohio University. The incidents, which go back to 1989, were discovered by a former student while he was researching for his thesis. In the library, he found passages of theses that were identical to those of other theses. In some cases, pages seemed to have been copied verbatim.

A committee has been formed to investigate the cases and determine punishments, possibly revoking degrees. As a result of these incidents, graduate students in the engineering school are now required to sign and submit a statement of originality with their theses.

LOCAL Black Jack to review housing law The city of Black Jack, Mo., will review a housing law that prevents unmarried parents with

as one of the two student Orientation directors, who help in the training of Orientation Ambassadors.

Junior Wendy Jenkins, who has served for two years as an Orientation ambassador for Beaumont, encouraged other students to become involved. Because of the new emphasis Bristow plans to place on student involvement, Jenkins anticipates a great experience this coming year as an Orientation ambassador.

“It’s a lot of fun,” Jenkins said. “I like the direct interaction with the freshmen floors,” she added.

more than one child from living together. Currently, the law forbids a group of three or more people from living together unless they’re related by “blood, marriage or adoption.” Because of this law, the city can deny occupancy permits to couples with more than one child if they are not married.

The law’s original intention was to keep frat houses and group homes out of residential areas.

Missouri upholds 24hour waiting period law for abortions A unanimous ruling by the Missouri Supreme Court on Tuesday upheld the law that requires women seeking abortions to wait for 24 hours. Those opposed to the law argued that it threatens privacy rights and liberty and was therefore unconstitutional. Affiliates of Planned Parenthood, which filed the case, also claimed that the law was unclear as it forces physicians to use the 24-hour period to discuss vague topics including the emotional risks of abortions.

Senior Sports Editor / Justin Davidson / sports@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | MARCH 1, 2006

STUDENT LIFE | SPORTS

5

SPORTS

Men’s hoops end season Track and field gears with heartbreaking loss up for the UAAs v Team fails to receive at-large bid from selection committee

By Justin Davidson Senior Sports Editor

By Andrei Berman

With the University Athletic Association (UAA) Championships and NCAA Championships just around the corner, the Washington University men’s and women’s track and ďŹ eld teams competed in their last two warmup meets before the culmination of indoor track season. On Friday, Feb. 17, the teams traveled to Bloomington, Ind., to compete in the Hoosier Hills Invitational, and last Friday, Feb. 24, they competed in the Chicago Invitational II in Chicago, Ill. Heading to Indiana University, a Division I school, posed a number of challenges for the DIII squads. Nevertheless, success was still found as the teams were able to get glimpses at some of the toughest programs in the country.

For the women, who have been having a solid season, a number of women shined. Natalie Badowski ďŹ nished ďŹ fth in the 400meter dash with a time of 59.39 in a competitive ďŹ eld in which the top 11 ďŹ nishers all ďŹ nished within ďŹ ve seconds of one another. Laura Ehret took home the

Sports Reporter The Washington University men’s basketball team lost what turned out to be its season finale Saturday 67-57 at the hands of the University of Chicago. Head coach Mark Edwards felt that the Bears deserved an NCA A tournament bid regardless of Saturday’s outcome, but the squad was not included among the small list of at-large tournament bids when selections were released late Sunday night.

The loss and subsequent exclusion from the tournament brought what had been an otherwise exciting season to an abrupt end.

The Bears had previously been riding high, having just won three in a row, including two on a grueling road trip last weekend to Brandeis University and New York University. On Saturday, though, the host Maroons held star University guard and second leading scorer, senior Scott Stone, in complete check, and Chicago was able to prevent the Bears’ generally reliable perimeter game from fully coming to fruition. The University hit just six of their 24 attempts from beyond the arch and was unable to thoroughly take advantage of its superior post play. The team shot 35 percent from the floor, as the offense remained stagnant for much of the afternoon.

The hosts opened the second half on a 12-4 scoring run, expanding its halftime lead of four to 12 and holding on the rest of the way to upset the Bears, who end their season at 17-8 overall and 9-5 in University Athletic Association (UA A) play.

Chicago shot 23-of-28 from the foul line, denying the possibility of a comeback.

Once the Maroons opened the half on the aforementioned run, Chicago never allowed the Bears to cut the lead to closer than eight points.

Senior center Mike Grunst was one of the few bright spots for the University on this otherwise disappointing day. He finished with 16 points in just 22 minutes of action. Sophomore star Troy Ruths, who on Tuesday

University’s only top ďŹ nish of the day with her time of 2:19.38 in the women’s 800-meter run, almost a full two seconds ahead of the ďŹ eld. In the same event, Lyuda Shemyakina ďŹ nished in ninth place, clocking in at 2:27.90.

Tricia Frisella found herself in fourth place out of 16 runners after the women’s 3,000-meter run with her time of 10:32.84, just 0.3 seconds behind the third place ďŹ nisher from Southern Indiana University.

The ďŹ eld team also did quite well despite the tough competition. Leah Sabin’s jump of 5.10 meters in the women’s long jump was good for third place, as was Danielle Wadlington’s 11.01-meter jump in the triple jump. Lastly, junior Delaina Martin rounded out the Lady Bears’ performance with her sixth place ďŹ nish in the women’s weight throw with a throw of 15.75 meters.

The men also performed well at Bloomington. Senior David Skiba ďŹ nished ďŹ fth in the 60-meter hurdles (8.37 meters), while Derek Leidigh and Jesse McDaniel ďŹ nished fourth and ďŹ fth, respectively, in the 3,000-meter run with times of 8:46.79 and 8:49.00. Joe Guinness ďŹ nished ninth in the same event with a time of 8:55.42.

The real highlights for the men’s squad, however, came in the ďŹ eld portion of the event. Karl Zelik ďŹ nished in second in the men’s long jump (14.02 meters) and Drew Martin ďŹ nished fourth in the shot put (14.94 meters).

At the Chicago Invitational II this past Friday, the squads were able to get a preview of the Chicago Maroons, one of the teams that the Bears will be competing against in the UAA Championships this weekend. The squad only sent a few representatives to the meet, however, to compete in speciďŹ c events. Morgan Leonard-Fleckman placed third in the women’s pole vault with a height of 3.36 meters while Nikki Fatigati ďŹ nished close behind in sixth in the same event with a height of 3.06 meters. They were the only two Bears to place in an event.

With the regular season now behind them, the indoor track squads now will focus their attention on the UAA Championships, which will be hosted by the University of Chicago this Friday and Saturday. The week after that on March 10-11 is the culmination of the season, as representatives of the squads will head to NorthďŹ eld, Minn., for the NCAA Division III Championships.

SPORTS BRIEFS Compiled by Justin Davidson Senior Sports Editor ALWYN LOH | STUDENT LIFE

Sophomore Bear Moss Schermerhorn leaps up to slam dunk a shot.

The men finished 17-8 this season with a loss to University of Chicago, who they had beat in overtime earlier in the season. was named a first team allUA A conference selection, finished with 11 points and eight rebounds. Stone, who was named to the league’s second team, recorded six assists in his final collegiate contest.

Joining Ruths and Stone with all-conference honors was freshman standout Tyler Nading. The freshman guard was named the UA A Rookie of the Year, as well as also an honorable mention all-league selection.

The Bears finished the season as UA A runners-up to league champion Carnegie Mellon. Next season promises to be another enjoyable one, as the Bears return three starters and a host of talented freshmen to a team that was probably

one victory short of making an NCA A tournament appearance for the first time since 2003.

Saturday was indicative of the team’s weakness throughout the season: a failure to win key road games. Of the team’s eight losses, four came on the road against league opponents. They finished below .500 on the road in conference contests (3-4), a factor that may have added increased skepticism to a selection committee that was assessing the University’s overall portfolio against the backdrop of a region which almost certainly had the most quality teams of any in the country.

Information gathered from bearsports.wustl.edu.

The women’s basketball team was named as host for the ďŹ rst two rounds of the 2006 NCAA Regionals on Friday and Saturday at the University Field House.

The third-ranked team (23-2, 13-1 UAA) has won 10 games in a row and is making their 17th straight trip to the Tournament. In the 18 Tournament appearances in the program’s history, the Red and Green have totalled four national championships (1998-2001) and six trips to the Final Four. They will face Manchester College (21-7) in Friday’s second game at 7 p.m. and with a win will play the winner of the Carroll College (23-4) and Calvin College (23-4) game, which will be played at 5 p.m. at the Field House on Friday. Saturday’s round two game will be at 7 p.m. in the Field House.

Senior Ryan Corning of baseball, senior Zack Fayne of men’s tennis, senior Kelly Manning of women’s basketball and freshman Shweta Pai of women’s tennis were named University

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Athletic Association (UAA) Athletes of the Week on Tuesday. Corning batted .500 and scored four runs in the Universityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s two wins in the seasonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s opening games against Fontbonne University. Fayne posted a 4-0 overall record as the 17thranked Bears upset two top-15 teams, Washington & Lee University and the University of Mary Washington, in Fredericksburg, Va., last weekend. Manning scored a UAA-record 39 points in the Bearsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; 87-77 win Saturday at the University of Chicago as she connected on 14-of-27 ďŹ eld goals and 9-of-9 free throws in 38 minutes of play. Pai won the No. 4 singles title at the Principia College Invitational in Elsah, Ill., last weekend by extending her singles play this season to 10-1.

JASON HUBERT | STUDENT LIFE

Senior Kelly Manning looks on as a teammate, freshman Jaimie McFarlin, knocks the toss to the Bearsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; side of the court.

Six Washington University womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s basketball players were named to the All-UAA team this year, as senior Kelly Manning garnered UAA Player of the Year honors. Senior Danielle Beehler and Manning were named to the ďŹ rst team, while senior Katie Benson, freshman Shanna-Lei Decannay, junior Rebecca Parker, and junior Sarah Schnell were named honorable mention.

Three Washington University menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s basketball players were also named to the All-UAA team, as freshman standout Tyler Nading earned UAA Rookie of the Year accolades. Sophomore Troy Ruths earned ďŹ rst-team honors, senior guard Scott Stone was named to the second team,

and Nading earned honorablemention honors. Ruths started 23 games for the Bears, leading the team in scoring (16.6) and rebounding (7.2). He ďŹ nished the season ranked fourth in the conference in scoring, sixth in rebounding and blocks (1.17), ninth in ďŹ eld goal percentage (.492) and 10th in free-throw percentage (.694). Stone ranked ďŹ rst in the UAA in three-pointers made (3.00), second in steals (1.76) and minutes played (33.84), third in assist-turnover ratio (2.02), seventh in assists (3.56), eighth in scoring (15.0) and ninth in threepoint ďŹ eld goal percentage (.355).

Nading averaged 9.1 points and 4.4 rebounds per game while also shooting a team-best 52 percent from the ďŹ eld, sixth best in the UAA.

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6 STUDENT LIFE | FORUM

Senior Forum Editor / Molly Antos / forum@studlife.com

FORUM

WEDNESDAY | MARCH 1, 2006

Our daily Forum editors: Monday: Jeff Stepp jsstepp@wustl.edu

Wednesday: Daniel Milstein daniel.milstein@wustl.edu

Friday: Joshua Trein jctrein@wustl.edu

To ensure that we have time to fully evaluate your submissions, guest columns should be e-mailed to the next issue’s editor or forwarded to forum@studlife.com by no later than 5 p.m. two days before publication.

Late pieces will be evaluated on a case-by-case basis.

We welcome your submissions, and thank you for your consideration.

STAFF EDITORIAL

The state of energy conservation on campus

T

urning off the lights to save energy sounds so ‘70s. Yet it may be the logical next step when it comes to stemming the tide of rising tuition costs at the University.

In a letter sent to students at the beginning of the semester, Dean Ed Macias informed students and parents that a number of cost pressures are pushing next year’s 5.5 percent rise in tuition, specifically those related to energy and employee health benefits. “How severe are these cost pressures?” asked Macias. The answer: “Our primary energy source—natural gas—is expected to nearly double over last year’s prices.”

As temperatures fell below freezing over the past month, campus heating expenditures again came to the forefront of environmentally aware stu-

dents’ attention, and we’ve been left wondering what the University has been doing to conserve energy.

When asked about the University’s efforts in this regard, Associate Vice Chancellor for Facilities Planning and Management Ralph Thaman explained that the University has in fact put in place a number of changes over the past 10-15 years designed to lower energy costs.

The addition of a power plant underneath Wohl Center in the ’93-’94 year, for instance, meant that high-pressure steam no longer had to be piped across campus at a 48 percent efficiency rate—instead, less expensive low-pressure steam could be used with greater efficiency.

More recently, fluorescent bulbs in buildings on campus were replaced with energy-efficient fluorescents, and fume hoods

in on-campus labs have been redesigned to consume 50 percent of the energy they did before. And while students have expressed concerns that the “always-on” heating and cooling systems in the new dorms may waste energy, it turns out that due to the addition of better insulation, thermal windows and four-pipe heating and cooling, these dorms are more energyefficient as well.

These are positive steps.

According to Thaman, on-campus energy usage has remained fairly flat. The real problem is that energy costs have gone up. So here’s the question that remains: what else can be done to cut energy costs on campus?

When asked about Residential Life’s efforts in this regard, Associate Director of ResLife Rob Wild said that they haven’t campaigned in recent years for

students to conserve energy.

ResLife’s big energy conservation measure, said Wild, has been making sure students turn down the heat and turn off appliances over winter break.

Neglecting to do so would significantly raise energy expenditures, he said.

Unfortunately, ResLife’s current efforts in this regard are not enough. Given the inescapable rise in heating and energy costs predicted in coming years, it seems that ResLife and the University need to have some serious conversations about how they can promote energy conservation on campus. Thaman noted that if students were to raise and lower their thermostats less often, it could certainly help push down our energy consumption.

Similar measures, like turning off the lights when leaving a

room, could potentially help as well. While asking students to conserve energy may lessen the feeling of no-strings-attached living that the University likes to cultivate, it’s an important and necessary step to take, given current energy trends.

Students on this campus have demonstrated a remarkable interest in promoting environmentally friendly living—the Committee on Environmental Quality and Green Action have both been instrumental in pushing for increased recycling efforts on campus, for instance. Perhaps ResLife could work in tandem with these groups to urge students to be more responsible with their energy usage. The Committee on Environmental Quality has already raised discussion of solar panel installation on campus, and might be able to think

of ways to push for similar change.

Final word: we shouldn’t hold our breath for change to come down from Brookings or student groups—individual students need to begin taking responsibility for combating rising heating costs. Here are some tips: turning the heat in dorm rooms up to 86 degrees in the winter or down to 65 degrees in the spring and fall is terribly wasteful. Learn to layer.

Turning the thermostat up and down every time the room gets a bit chilly or stuffy compounds energy costs, since the heating/ cooling systems have to kick in an extra time. And finally, turn off the lights—it may not be the ‘70s, but the world is running out of fossil fuels at a fast clip, meaning another energy crisis of massive proportions is well on its way.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Shuttle article exemplifies WU student elitism Dear Editor: I was appalled at the Feb. 27 op-ed by Jeff Stepp (“Shuttle system puts students at risk”). Jeff’s distaste for the greater St. Louis community is painfully obvious, and is a textbook example of a dysfunctional town-gown relationship. If the Wash. U. community ever wonders why they seem to be so universally disliked around this city, they can take a close look at Jeff’s column and the ample naivete within.

Really, I just need to cut and paste this line to sum up most of the absurdity: “What about criminals using the shuttle as a way to get access to students, or as a getaway?” Apparently, he thinks that our shuttle drivers have no common sense or observational skills.

I also have to point out that Jeff’s idea that the Metrolink will bring more crime to the Wash.

U. area is exactly the excuse that the residents of St. Charles used to block the extension to their city. The racism and classism here is barely concealed: Jeff Stepp is afraid of the poorer, black residents of the city who ride public transportation. God forbid they ride our shuttles or set foot in the hallowed halls of our elite educational institution!

On a more personal note, I have caught the shuttle on numerous occasions to and from my old apartment in the West End, and the driver always checked my I.D. The only community members that I ever saw on the shuttle were a young mother and her daughter (who was being dropped off at the New City school), and some young men riding between bus stops. I have never been harassed or felt threatened by my neighbors or other riders on the Metrolink, and I am proud to be a St. Louis City resident. It is pieces like Jeff Stepp’s that make me ashamed to be affiliated with Wash. U.

that Hilltop Campus would be renamed Danforth Campus was “What?!” Superficially, the name change seems like another one of our University’s strange but benign decisions—like the decision to put an orb and a pyramid at the underpass. But it also sets an unwelcome precedent.

If there is anyone alive who deserves to have Hilltop Campus named after him it is William Danforth. I do not debate Danforth’s worthiness as a leader and philanthropist, which Chancellor Wrighton outlined in his Feb. 23 letter announcing the name change. Rather, I believe that it is wrong to name a Wash.

U. campus after a person.

Naming residence halls, facilities and scholarships after people who have given time or money to the University makes sense, but naming an entire campus after someone elevates that person above all other donors. A facility named after a person or company says “I exist because of this entity’s donation to the University.” Hilltop Campus exists because many entities collaborated and donated their combined resources to the University.

While William Danforth may have given more time and more money to Wash. U. than anyone else, his contributions were no more or less crucial to the University’s growth than those of other donors. William Greenleaf Eliot, our University’s founder (and who, like Danforth, has a residence hall and a scholarship named after him) understood this, which is why his first act as third chancellor of Eliot Seminary was to change the name to Washington University in St. Louis. There are ways to honor William Danforth that do not corrupt Eliot’s legacy or diminish the value of other donors’ contributions. Hilltop Campus should remain Hilltop Campus.

people who attended the ex-gay conference, Love Won Out, did so by choice, so the organizers of the conference are doing nothing wrong, however deceptive and damaging their program may be. Let the buyer beware.

While I don’t agree with this logic, I’m sure that a debate over it will get absolutely nowhere, so I won’t argue this point. Maas is wrong, however, that everyone who attended did so by choice.

I was there at the protest, and I saw the parents who forced their 16- and 17-year-old kids to attend. These kids did not want to be there—later, after I left, one of them even snuck out of the conference, picked up a sign, and joined the protest, until his father came and dragged him back inside. Some parents panic when they find out that their children are gay and bring them to these groups, where they hear the identities that they are just beginning to discover labeled

as diseases. These parents most likely know nothing about the gay community save what they’ve heard from conservative groups like this, who say that life as a member of it is dark and loveless, which is not true.

But then they heard somewhere that the ex-gay movement was an effective “cure,” which is also not true, but they’re willing to believe.

Parental authority is another point of contention, but surely parents should at least be aware of all the facts before they force their kids into a program that, according to its own literature, has only a 30 percent success rate, and that, according to the consensus of both the medical and psychological communities, does more harm than good. The GLBT community is not trying to tell people what to do with their lives. We just want people to know what they’re getting themselves into with these groups, or,

worse, what they’re forcing their kids into.

-Jeff Binder Class of 2007

Be careful of your actions; STDS don’t discriminate Dear Editor: Re: hannah draper’s response I appreciate your response to my article. You basically say that undergraduates live in a limbo between childhood and true adulthood and that should be an excuse for enjoying this ill-defined place.

My response is a story and two morals. My brother-in-law’s sister died this weekend in a car wreck along with one of her

sons. She always joked about not wearing seat belts and now the consequences of her decisions have been realized. Her boyfriend who was buckled in was not hurt.

Moral one: Limbo or not, be prepared to reap the consequences of your actions. No excuses and no help from family to pull you out. The “laws” of physics and biology are not suspended for undergrads. STD’s don’t discriminate.

Moral two: Your decisions will impact others. The woman who died left an injured son, a grieving mother and brother, and a devastated family. Decisions made in college can and will impact others. No one can escape the ripple effect of their decisions on their families, friends, future mates, and children.

-David Bauman Graduate student

KARL IMPROV AND RACHEL TEPPER | EDITORIAL CARTOON

-Benjamin Kay Class of 2008

-Alissa Nelson Staff, Biology Department

Conference attendees not all Main campus should present by choice remain ‘Hilltop’ Dear Editor: Dear Editor: Like many other students, my first reaction on hearing

In his article, “In protest of the protesters,” Bill Maas uses a basic libertarian argument. The

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Student Life welcomes letters to the editor and op-ed submissions from readers.

Editorials are written by the Forum editors and reflect the consensus of the editorial board. The editorial board operates independently of the newsroom.

Once an article has been published on www.studlife.com, our Web site, it will remain there permanently. We do not remove articles from the site, nor do we remove authors’ names from articles already published on the Web, unless an agreement was reached prior to July 1, 2005.

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Senior Forum Editor / Molly Antos / forum@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | MARCH 1, 2006

STUDENT LIFE | FORUM

7

Scouting out the course listings T

his week, I have one midterm, one paper and a problem set due. And I know that there are people scoffi ng at how light that is compared to the myriad of orgo work due this week. But it’s a lot for me. So naturally, I spent my Sunday night being as productive as possible: I planned out my fall 2006 schedule.

Course listings were posted on WebSTAC over the weekend, and the buzz spread around my suite rapidly. Almost as fast as the news of an encounter with Howard Stern. It seems

downright silly that a bunch of expert procrastinators can be so excited about planning for an event that is still two months away, but yet there we were, screaming through the walls, asking what classes the other was trying to take.

Planning a schedule is a lot like the NFL draft. You scout out your top prospect on ratemyprofessors. com, you see what needs the prospect can fi ll, you look for backups in case your prospect is taken by another team. You want to pick the right classes to help you get that Super Bowl diploma in

to wake up early. the future, but you’re There are two intrigued by that one major differences prospect who won’t between picking fi ll any needs, yet classes and the NFL seems too good to draft, though. The pass up. You take a fi rst is that you can’t late-round fl ier on a trade your slot in prospect that could the order. As much be hard to develop, Daniel Milstein as I try, I can’t get and decide to take anyone to register that class pass/fail. for a class and let me You hope that you take it in exchange for other get a good spot in the order, classes. The other difference but realize that the cost may is that you don’t have to deal be high: like an NFL team with agents trying to hype getting a good pick after a up their players. And that horrible season, you would is something that should have to have gotten a bad change. spot before. And you’d have

In defense of Larry Summers

By Steven Hoffmann Staff Colunmnist

W

hat’s the difference between Islamic terrorists who go bananas over cartoons and 218 faculty members at Harvard who hate free speech? Islamic terrorists have beards.

Larry Summers’ forced resignation is a disgusting episode for American academia. But it shouldn’t surprise us. American academia constantly undermines the values that it is supposed to uphold. The real issue is not insensitivity, leadership style, or lack of confidence, it is academic free speech.

Harvard professors sent a clear message: “Your speech will be monitored, and if you say something we don’t like, we will humiliate you.”

That’s not how academic free speech is supposed to work.

It’s ironic that university professors claim to be the bastions of free speech, even as the Chronicle of Higher Education is filled with examples of abuses of power.

Tenure is denied to a highly qualified professor because of his political views (Oct. 28, 2005). Professors are fired without just cause because of rumors (Feb. 10).

Students, who have no rights to enforce violations, are repeatedly harassed. Now, university presidents who dare to question feminist hegemonies are deposed at will.

Summers’ trouble started when he suggested that “intrinsic aptitude” may contribute to the low number of women in math and science.

In fact, he suggested that this needs to be researched and perhaps corrected. A group of radical feminist professors immediately stormed out of the room and started bitching. Let’s review the facts. Summers was speaking not as a representative of Harvard, but as an expert economist and an invited guest. His comments directly related to research that he was engaged in.

Many scholars agree with Summers’ suggestion. A professor’s duty is to tell the truth as he or she sees it.

Another reason Summers

is hated is because he criticized Cornel West for giving hundreds of speeches a year, producing rap albums and appearing in “The Matrix” while giving cursory attention to his role as a teacher.

West was incensed to have been exposed, and left for Princeton. But even there, serious questions about the qualitative merits of his scholarship persist. If West had been white, no one would have cared. University presidents are generally allowed to question the work of their faculty. Harvard now sends the message that the scholarship of black faculty members cannot be questioned. If I were a black professor, I would find that suggestion—that my career relied on the protection of a group of elite whites—highly insulting.

The fact that university campuses are liberal doesn’t even need to be repeated.

What about the supposed liberal values of forgiveness, compassion and love? Not for Summers. Once a faction of dissident professors decided to take Summers down, nothing would stop them. Summers repeatedly apologized for offending his audience. Ruth Wisse, a professor of Yiddish at Harvard, said, “I think that this is a posse looking for excuses to lasso its target.”

Summers’ forced ousting raises questions about who controls private universities.

Recently, Academe Magazine featured an article about what universities would be like if they fired their trustees and professors took over.

Several words come to mind: frightening, dictatorship, groupthink and dangerous. In Summers’ case, 57 percent of students support him, and only 19 percent think that he should resign.

(Students, by the way, are the folks who pay professors’ salaries.) The Harvard Corporation supported Summers from the beginning. Yet a radical group of professors was able to hijack the publicity and sound-bite machine. Ultimately, Harvard itself will suffer.

Summers was known for his intolerance of waste and non-productivity. He supported departments that produced results, and criticized pseudo-intellectual departments, such as social anthropology. Harvey Mansfield, a professor of government, summed up the detractors by saying, “these people are mostly the feminist left and its sympathizers. They fear that affirmative action will be abolished and diminished.

They want more diversity, which means, paradoxically, more people like themselves.

They want to run the university.” The professors criticizing Summers would not even be employed if it weren’t for liberal cronyism. They are mostly the talking heads of

redundant departments: women’s studies and English literature. (For full disclosure, this writer is an English literature major who took women’s studies last semester).

And they won. Complacency can resume without Summers shaking things up. So we end by ignoring the problem that lead to Summers’ downfall: girls are struggling to keep up with boys in science and math. There’s one more male economist out of the way. But I doubt that Harvard’s actions will help either boys or girls, especially those whose minds they are charged with educating. In the future, academia will continue to lose the best and brightest minds to other careers, not because biology or “intrinsic aptitude” is at work, but because American universities—like Islamic radicals—hate free speech, unless it comes out of their own mouths.

Harvard students can tell the difference between scholarly criticism and personal vendettas. Let’s hope that students’ outrage is able to force the cleansings that some academic departments need so badly.

Steven is a junior in Arts & Sciences. He can be reached via e-mail at hoffmann@wustl.edu.

RACHEL TEPPER | STUDENT LIFE

When looking at the course listings, there are some classes that just confound me. I can’t tell if they will be interesting or simply a lot of work for little reward.

Meanwhile, just last week, there was sophomore convocation, when sophomores had an opportunity to talk to professors in their major department. This would have been a perfect opportunity for confused students like me to ask questions about the classes, or for professors to talk about their classes and get people interested. Alas, if course listings came out a

week sooner, or the convocation was a week later, there would have been an opportunity for this combination.

How useful such an event would be cannot be foreseen, especially considering the poor showing at the “mandatory” sophomore convocation.

But if events like this take place each year, it certainly couldn’t hurt. Especially since I hear Dean McLeod throws one hell of a football.

Daniel is a sophomore in Arts & Sciences and a Forum editor.

He can be reached via e-mail at forum@studlife.com.

Beads, boobs and booze: What is Mardi Gras, anyway?

By Tess Croner Staff Colunmnist

I

’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “rebel without a cause,” but what about “reveler without a clue?”

On Saturday, I was a part of the mass migration of Wash. U. students headed for the Soulard neighborhood, host to the St. Louis Mardi Gras festivities.

Soulard was crammed with a good 600,000 people, most of them intoxicated to the point of messy embarrassment. All around me men and women, necks draped with flashy beads and faces obscured by sequined jester hats, were guzzling beer from pitchers and fish bowls, their eyes directed at the windows of buildings lining the streets.

And who could blame them? These windows promised glimpses of the apparent essence and soul of Mardi Gras: the elusive breast, abandoning its blouse on this holiest of days. I stood with my guy friends and watched as girls in windows heckled the crowd and reached out with greedy hands for the strands of beads tossed at them by the spectators below. Then they would flash, the crowd would cheer, and all parties would be satisfied. An exchange of beads for skin: everyone leaves happy. As I looked around me—at the desperate dives for beads thrown from windows, at the grown men and women dressed as cavemen and Vikings, and at the girls shirking their shirts for some cheap jewelry—I couldn’t help but think, “What the hell is this?”

I realized that I have no clue what Mardi Gras is really all about; what I saw is all I know.

And it couldn’t be the whole truth. There had to be more to this than beads, boobs and booze.

So I did a little digging and soon learned that Mardi Gras

is French for “Fat Tuesday,” also referred to as “Shrove Tuesday” or “Pancake Day.” It falls before Ash Wednesday, the beginning of the Christian liturgical season of Lent. “Fat Tuesday” alludes to the great feast before a day of fast. The name “Shrove Tuesday” originated in the Middle Ages when shriveners (priests) would absolve people of their sins to prepare them for Lent. And people in Britain, Ireland and Australia use “Pancake Day” to make loads of crepe-like pancakes in order to not waste milk and eggs (forbidden during Lent).

Mardi Gras allows for some fi nal revelry before a time of reflection and abstinence. It is like the bachelor party before a lifetime of marital responsibility. It’s the fi nal fl ing, and strippers are always invited.

Ash Wednesday is a time for remembering your mortality, and Mardi Gras seems to be the celebration to remind you that you are alive enough to drink yourself to death.

Mardi Gras is the idiocy before contemplation, the sin before redemption, the indulgence before abstinence. We are expected to act like morons because, for one day, judgment is suspended. The teacher has turned her back on the playground, and we can all go ape.

And if that’s what you did, now you have your beads, your hangover and maybe some clue as to what it’s all about. Just remember that after Tuesday the idea is to sit in our dorms, fast, probably study some too, and reflect on our sins. As for me, the beads are hanging at the foot of my bed, the bizarre images are still vivid, and I’m just glad to know a little more of the story behind the baffl ing debauchery of the Soulardi Gras.

Tess is a freshman in Arts & Sciences. She can be reached via e-mail at tacroner@wustl.edu.

Why there are no angels in Darfur

By Nathan Everly Staff Colunmnist

F

or an insight into the U.S. policy towards the confl ict in Darfur, Sudan, look no further than U.S. Senate resolution No. 172. This bipartisan legislation acknowledges that “horrible crimes” have left 400,000 Africans dead and even asserts that “genocide has been committed.” But instead of helping to end the confl ict, it urges the United States to “unite in prayer for the people of Darfur.” While certainly worthwhile, the resolution did nothing to stop the violence. It did demonstrate that the United States will “consider Darfur” but avoid any substantial action.

It has reflexively deferred the crisis to the African Union in the hope that it will fi nd an “African solution.” But the

African Union cannot stop the genocide by itself. The crisis has simply grown too large for 7,000 poorly equipped troops to adequately police a region the size of France.

Something more needs to be done, and the United States must understand that a national prayer weekend will not vindicate its failure to act.

Eventually, the United States must listen to the African Union and learn that prayer alone cannot stop the genocide if “there are no angels in Darfur.”

The confl ict in Darfur began when the Sudan Liberation Movement attacked government troops to protest the region’s political marginalization. Frustrated by its inability to effectively deal with this insurgency, the government initiated a full-fledged ethnic cleansing. In what Smith College Professor Eric Reeves calls “genocide by attrition,”

the Sudanese government armed and mobilized local Arab Janjaweed militia to begin “systematically destroying the African tribal groups perceived as the civilian base of support for the insurgents.”

So far, this policy has killed 400,000 Darfuri civilians and displaced over 2.5 million people into large refugee camps throughout the region.

Yet, the region’s humanitarian situation threatens to further escalate the catastrophe.

Despite U.N. Secretary-General Kofi Annan’s insistence that African Union troops are doing “a great job,” the killing continues.

The humanitarian group Doctors Without Borders recently warned that “international assistance...could be cut off at a moment’s notice because of the continued insecurity in the region.” Indeed, foreign aid deliveries to nearly 3.5 million dependant civil-

ians can only continue if the region remains safe enough to supply the region. Unfortunately, that isn’t happening.

Attacks on refugee camps and aid workers have jeopardized the ability of humanitarian relief groups to operate in the region. Some workers have been forced to evacuate and there are contingency plans to withdraw the remaining workers. A complete withdrawal would raise the current death rate in Darfur to around 100,000 per month, creating what U.N. humanitarian chief Jan Egeland called the world’s “greatest...crisis.”

It is difficult to understand why the Bush Administration has done so little to stop the violence in Darfur. The United States is bound “to prevent” genocide under Article I of the 1948 United Nations Convention on the Punishment and Prevention of Genocide.

To be fair, the United States

is the most generous donor of humanitarian aid to the region. And it has applied intense diplomatic pressure on Sudan. But a 2004 Sudanese peace accord has prevented the United States from doing more. The North-South peace agreement was rightly hailed as a foreign policy victory for the Bush Administration because it ended a decadeslong civil war between the Sudanese government and rebels in southern Sudan. Yet the Sudanese government has repeatedly threatened to scrap the agreement if it is pressed on its role in Darfur.

Fearing a renewed civil war, the United States has failed to hold the Sudanese government accountable.

In order to stop the genocide in Darfur, the Janjaweed militia and the Darfuri rebels must be disarmed and the Sudanese government must be forced to end its counter-

insurgency program. The only adequate measure for achieving this is a U.S.-led deployment of thousands of NATO peacekeeping troops into the region. Yes, Iraq and Afghanistan have strained the United States military. But the 2,000 American troops currently stationed in nearby Djibouti can form the backbone of a peacekeeping force with a mandate to end the violence.

If President Bush is unwilling to make such a commitment, then he should remember that he famously scribbled “Not on my watch” in the margins of a memo outlining President Clinton’s failure to stop a 1994 genocide in Rwanda that murdered 800,000 Africans.

Nathan is a sophomore in the School of Engineering and Applied Sciences. He can be reached via e-mail at nee1@ cec.wustl.edu.

8 STUDENT LIFE | CADENZA

Senior Cadenza Editor / Laura Vilines / cadenza@studlife.com

WEDNESDAY | MARCH 1, 2006

THEATRE REVIEW

Shakespeare calls: ‘Much to do, come see my play’

By Robbie Gross Theatre Editor When the character Claudio cries, “Are our eyes our own?” midway through the Performing Arts Department’s production of “Much Ado About Nothing,” the audience can do little more than sigh. In this Shakespearean comedy, mistaken identity is the rule, not the exception. Lovers are deceived into hate and nonlovers into love.

The play surrounds the love affairs of two couples.

Upon returning from war, Count Claudio (Rob Klemisch) and Signor Benedick (Justin Joseph) are introduced largely through a masked ball to Hero (Barrie Golden) and Beatrice (Laura Harrison). While the romantics Claudio and Hero fall in love rather quickly, Benedick and Beatrice are not as fortunate. Given to caustic battles of wit or flirtation, they engage in a classic game of who-can-hate-the-

other-more before ultimately succumbing to their love for each other—after both are initially tricked into thinking that the other loves them.

This love story, set in Italy, would be a simple matter were it not for Don John (Andrew Byrd), the illegitimate brother of Don Pedro (Matt Goldman), a prince and fellow soldier. With bitterness and malice, John breaks up Claudio and Hero’s marriage through a deceptive scheme.

Enter a dozen other characters, including a comedic duo of police officers, and the comedy (with a customary bit of tragedy) takes off.

Though the play is about deception, its viewers are never deceived about its quality. Director Henry Schvey has given us a charming production of Shakespeare’s play.

Any discussion of the performance must begin with the set. Performed in 1920s costume (well designed by veteran Bonnie Kruger),

the production marks one of those rare (on any stage and with whatever talent) moments when updating Shakespeare truly works, or at least does not fail. While post-WWI Italy might not be the most obvious place to set the play, Don John and his cronies make for good mobsters in suits, and the general pace of life reflects an Italy in the years before fascism rises to power.

The acting, however, deserves the most attention. Shakespeare is not the easiest of fare for younger actors, but this cast proves itself to be well trained and more than capable. Joseph and Harrison, playing the most interesting characters, provide the most interesting storylines as well. As the sharp and iconoclastic Beatrice, Harrison chose an excellent role for exhibiting her many talents and ending her five-year career of PAD performances.

It is the freshman Joseph, though, who steals

this show. As the wildly gesticulating, eyebrowraising and tone-changing Benedick, Joseph provides one of the best performances by a freshman in recent memory. While some of the other veteran PAD actors have been better suited for more modern, avant-garde plays, Joseph seems right at home in his Shakespearean world, rattling off his lines with near-perfect comedic timing and poise. Lastly, Rob McLemore is hilarious as the police officer Dogberry. One can only fear the consequences of a “Much Ado” without heavy doses of comic, often slapstick-style relief.

As a hopeful love story, “Much Ado” marks the perfect transition from gloomy winter (and its corresponding darker productions, such as last month’s “Ipi Zombi?”) to fecund spring. As a show with many standout performances, directions and ideas, it is well worth the price of admission.

DAVID KLIPER | WUSTL PHOTO SERVICES

Those “Much Ado” folks sure are snappy dressers.

MOVIE REVIEW

‘Failure to Launch’ certainly no failure

By Adam Summerville Movie Editor “Failure to Launch” is a completely mismarketed movie. To anyone who has seen the trailer, it would appear to be a run-of-the-mill romantic comedy—which it most certainly is not. That’s not to say that it doesn’t have many of the trappings of the traditional romantic comedy, but it also has a much stranger nonromantic side that the trailer seems to ignore entirely.

Trip (Matthew McConaughey) is a charming

30-something bachelor with a good, well-paying job, but he still lives with his parents. They are getting sick of his constantly being around the house, so they bring in Paula (Sarah Jessica Parker), a “professional motivator,” to simulate a relationship with him in order to build up his self-esteem and ultimately get him out of the house.

The romance that blossoms is entirely unsurprising, and if it made up the majority of the movie, the fi lm would be very underwhelming. Instead, a large portion of the movie is

devoted to the wacky friends of both leads. Trip’s best friends are Ace (Justin Bartha), a computer dork who lives in his mom’s basement, and Demo (Bradley Cooper), a man whose only residence is where his heart takes him—i.e., he’s a bum. Kit (Zooey Deschanel) is Paula’s roommate and is certainly the funniest presence in the movie. One of the major plotlines of the movie is Kit’s quest to kill a mockingbird that lives outside her window, which is quite funny and just a bit out of place. In fact, there are more than a couple animal

attacks in the movie for seemingly no reason. They are certainly amusing to watch, but they also leave you scratching your head.

The movie goes from sappy romance to light drama to buddy fl ick to slapstick comedy at the drop of a hat and, amazingly, does all of them reasonably well. The juxtaposition of all these elements, however, leads to a very disjointed fi lm.

Parker and McConaughey do a fi ne job, but the supporting actors do even better.

Deschanel, Bartha and Cooper all seem to be having a good

time, and they help soften the blow of the fi lm’s mood swings. There are also some good cameos by Rob Corddry of “The Daily Show” fame and Patton Oswalt. As a comedy, the movie does a good job— fortunately, this makes up the fi rst three quarters of the fi lm.

Sadly, when the movie kicks into the romantic comedy routine at the three-quarter mark, the pacing takes a massive nosedive, and the rest of the movie crawls as they try to get the two leads to realize their love. For those looking for a comedy with some light

romance sprinkled on top, à la “Wedding Crashers,” “Failure to Launch” would be a good choice. But for those looking for the standard date movie, look elsewhere.

“Failure to Launch” Rating: ★★★✬✩ Starring: Matthew McConaughey, Sarah Jessica Parker, Justin Bartha, Zooey Deschanel, Bradley Cooper Opening: March 10

FRESHMAN FIFTEEN

BLACKFILM.COM

Ah, what a beautiful night...

ALBUM REVIEW

VIDEO GAME REVIEW

Geometry Wars

By Jordan Deam Music Editor Five bucks doesn’t buy a lot these days, especially when it comes to video games. With top-tier titles for the Xbox 360 approaching the $60 mark, not to mention the hefty price tag of the console itself, casual gamers are left with fewer options, between the free flash games available on the Net and the massive, big-budget blockbusters of highprofile gaming studios.

If “Geometry Wars” merely filled this niche, it would easily be worth the $5 that it costs to download from the Xbox 360’s live service. But after spending a couple months playing the arcade-y shooter while glitzier titles like “Perfect Dark Zero” collected dust, I had a startling realization: this little 10-minute downloadable “extra” is the best game that the 360 has to offer.

What began as an unlockable minigame within the Xbox title “Project Gotham Racing 2” has become one of the most streamlined, pure video game experiences possible. There are no complicated controls to memorize, no subpar plots or dialogue to disappoint and annoy and no real characterizations to follow. Basically, you control a tiny hexagonal ship trapped within a two-dimensional grid that appears to be somehow

suspended in space. As you fly within the confines of this grid, you are assaulted by increasing numbers of rival shapes—purple pinwheels, blue diamonds and green squares, to name a few—each with different means of crashing into you and ending the game. Why these figures are so hell-bent on your destruction is totally irrelevant—did the suicidal amphibian in “Frogger” need a reason to cross 16 lanes of freeway traffic, only to be repeatedly squished?

After the first minute or so of navigating this grid, one realizes why there was so little attempt at providing a context for the game play. The visuals, consisting of colorful sparks that fly from each enemy as you carve a path through them, fluid ripples in the grid caused by the “mass” of your guns and intermittent “black holes” that spawn around the grid, are so satisfying that they need no reason to exist: they are their own reward. Of course, spectators will be able to enjoy these particle effects more than the player, who must use every ounce of his concentration to avoid being swept up in the masses of swirling colors that eventually envelop the screen.

What lifts “Geometry Wars” beyond the level of cheap eye candy is the surprising amount of depth and replay value that the game holds. Of course, getting a new high score is incred-

BY JASON ANDERSON

ibly satisfying, but even amidst a lackluster performance one can still appreciate the quick reflexes and cunning strategy (and of course a dash of luck) that can be found in a good run.

At first glance, it would seem that a $5 minigame that somehow trumps the dozen or so big-budget titles the 360 has to offer is a gross failure for the fledgling console. But if “Geometry Wars” is indicative of the kind of effort that Microsoft will be making in future Xbox Live titles…well, let’s just say there’s a lot more to be excited about than “Halo 3.”

Grade: ★★★★★ Worth it for: the great graphics, amazing game play and insanely low price The main drawback: after breaking 100,000 points, the game’s addictive qualities start to emerge Should be played by: fans of old-school arcade games because fast reflexes and high scores are king, but it should be enjoyed by all Final word: the purest gaming experience this side of Ms. Pacman

Cat Power:‘The Greatest’

By Robbie Gross Theatre Editor Thirty-five years after Leonard Cohen’s “Songs of Love and Hate,” Chan Marshall (Cat Power) has produced her own album of love and hate. The result, “The Greatest,” is her best effort since 2003’s “You are Free” and perhaps the best release of the young year.

Though the haunting, deep vocals once again steal the show, “The Greatest” is far from an instrumental slouch, and Chan Marshall is far from just a simple folk singer.

Recorded in Memphis, Tenn., with accompaniment by a virtual all-star team of session musicians, including guitarist Mabon “Teenie” Hodges, the album is a sprawling and beautiful mixture of instruments, tempos, styles and emotions.

Together, Marshall’s three

best songs highlight the album’s depth. The title track, which opens the album, is a slow and jazzy number. About a boy who desires to become a great boxer, it exhibits tasteful piano chords interchanged with sighing violins as Marshall’s stunningly somber lyric, “Once I wanted to BE the greatest,” repeats itself, the song’s last word echoed back to her by distant back-up vocals.

The sparseness of the opening track is soon followed by a succession of songs alternating in tempo and style.

“Willie,” which appears in the middle of the album, particularly stands out. Soulful and sad, it features her best songwriting on the album, with a simple yet powerful narrative worthy of Springsteen: “Willie Deadwilder and Rebecca / they knew that they loved one another,” she begins. “Gonna

Cat Power “The Greatest” Grade: ★★★★✩ Songs to download: “The Greatest,” “Willie,” “Love & Communication” For fans of: PJ Harvey, Leonard Cohen, Bruce Springsteen

have a real good time / no more sad bad times.” Like a Springsteen or Leonard Cohen song, of course, the promise of the opening lines soon turns to the pain of violence and tragedy.

In “Love & Communication,” which closes the album, Marshall introduces new textures. The soft and simple chord progression of the preceding track (not incidentally called “Hate”) transitions into an electric sound fi lled with bluesy guitar riffs and piano melodies. This last track marks the closest approximation to the musical intensity Marshall mobilized in “He War” on her 2003 album.

And while “The Greatest” fails to reach the thematic heights of “You Are Free,” it nonetheless marks a development in Cat Power from stripped-down folk singing to full-fledged musicianship.

WEDNESDAY | MARCH 1, 2006

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10 STUDENT LIFE | CADENZA

Senior Cadenza Editor / Laura Vilines / cadenza@studlife.com

n. a technically brilliant, sometimes improvised solo

CADEN Z A

passage toward the close of a concerto, an exceptionally brilliant part of an artistic work

arts & entertainment

Oscar Picks

By the Cadenza Staff The 78th Annual Academy Awards are this Sunday, and we here at Cadenza would like to share our thoughts and feelings on who we think will win and who we think should win, noting the frequent disparity between the two.

Best Picture

In the Running: “Brokeback Mountain,” “The Constant Gardener,” “Memoirs of a Geisha,” “Munich,” “Pride & Prejudice” What will win: “Brokeback Mountain” Hollywood loves it, it stirred up controversy and it was a bittersweet love story about cowboys. I don’t see how it could lose.

What should win: “Brokeback Mountain” Ang Lee, still stunned after “Hulk” got completely shut out by Oscar, should pick one up for director as well.

AFTERELTON.COM

INDIEWIRE.COM

Best Actor

In the Running: Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Terrence Howard, Heath Ledger, Joaquin Phoenix, David Strathairn Who will win: Phillip Seymour Hoffman The Academy loves when an actor affects his voice, and Hoffman is overdue for recognition.

Who should win: Phillip Seymour Hoffman In the battle for “best character to imitate,” Hoffman’s raspy highpitched Southern accent wins out over Ledger’s inaudible drawl.

OCREGISTER.COM

Best Supporting Actor

MOVIES.YAHOO.COM

In the Running: George Clooney, Matt Dillon, Paul Giamatti, Jake Gyllenhaal, William Hurt Who will win: William Hurt The Academy loves giving out awards to supporting actors who steal movies with only a brief performance (see Judi Dench).

Who should win: Paul Giamatti Giamatti will pick up the special “Jim Carrey” award for most nonnominations by a deserving actor.

MOVIES.YAHOO.COM

Best Actress

HISTORYOFVIOLENCE.COM

In the Running: Judi Dench, Felicity Huffman, Keira Knightley, Charlize Theron, Reese Witherspoon Who will win: Reese Witherspoon Hollywood loves this girl, and she was certainly the best thing in “Walk the Line.”

Who should win: Keira Knightley This one is a pretty sure bet for Witherspoon, but more people should check out “Pride & Prejudice”...I can’t believe I just said that, either.

PLANET.NL

Best Supporting Actress

INDIEWIRE.COM

In the Running: Amy Adams, Catherine Keener, Frances McDormand, Rachel Weisz, Michelle Williams Who will win: Catherine Keener She has been overdue for an Oscar, and Hollywood liked “The 40Year-Old Virgin” more than you would think.

Who should: Rachel Weisz Whether it’s AIDS policies in Africa or desiccated, plague-ridden mummies, Weisz has shown time and time again that she can do a wonderful job and look beautiful in the process.

FILMSTARTS.DE

WATCHING CRAP SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO

By Adam Summerville Movie Editor My life is one of simple pleasures: Squeezing the toothpaste perfectly onto the brush.

Having a good run in “Super Mario Bros.” Getting to Holmes Lounge before a 30-minute line appears. However, one of the things in life that I derive the most pleasure from is watching an entire season of TV in one weekend. I’d say it easily places in my top three, along with more obvious and base choices of sneezing and sex. I, for one, am not one for delayed pleasure, so there is little to be gained from waiting a week to discover what happens to my favorite characters.

Most shows are better in marathon form, but there are a select few that almost demand to be watched in extended six-hour stretches. The most obvious television show that fits this description is “24,” the

WEDNESDAY | MARCH 1, 2006

VERBEAT.ORG

The pleasures of TV on DVD

high-tension terrorism drama that single-handedly revived Kiefer Sutherland’s career.

There has never been a more pure entertainment experience than the 24-hour “24” marathon. For added authenticity points, start the episodes on the corresponding actual hour, using the dead commercial minutes as time to do such important things as eating and urinating. If CTU agent Jack Bauer is able to make such sacrifices, you can do the same.

The show is just so fi lled to the brim with intrigue and action that it almost brings one physical pain to have to wait to fi nd out what the terrorists are plotting and how they are going to be stopped.

Similar on the drama front is “Lost.” The show certainly does its best to keep people constantly guessing about what is actually going on, with each episode containing no fewer than seven “Okay, I think I

figured it out…wait, what the hell?” moments. As with “24,” there is nothing a person wants more in life than to watch the next episode of “Lost” after watching one episode of it. The show also gets better when you go back and rewatch episodes to pick up on patterns and subtleties that creep up as you get involved with the show. J.J. Abrams is certainly a great storyteller, and “Lost” is a show that deserves to be watched and demands to be watched constantly.

A personal favorite of mine is the recently concluded “Arrested Development.” The show had wry and clever writing, and while the plots became increasingly bizarre, there was always a very down-to-earth element present in the characters. The show benefits from the DVD format because many of the jokes are leitmotifs, referencing episodes as far back as the fi rst. To help keep things

fresh in one’s mind, it is necessary to watch numerous episodes back to back. The jokes also have a habit of coming in relentless torrents, so the added benefits of being able to pause, rewind and watch again reduce the number of missed jokes, which, given the selfreferential nature of the show, leads to even more jokes being understood.

“Firefly” is Joss Whedon’s greatest achievement. Depending on which side of the Joss Whedon fence you sit on, that either means you are now thinking “Oh my god, he just said ‘Buffy’ sucks!”, “That isn’t surprising, ‘Buffy’ sucked” or “Who the hell is Joss Whedon?”

“Firefly” is the best science fiction television series ever, beating out any Star Trek series and even the X-Files at its best.

Following the ragtag crew of the Serenity, the show is like watching the adventures of Han Solo with a bit of humor

and an American-civil-warset-in-space plot thrown in for good measure. The characters are just so likeable and undergo such growth throughout the short series that every single episode just makes one want to watch more.

The guiltiest of all my pleasures is the bliss brought on by watching “The Gilmore Girls.”

I have heard many complaints against the show, the loudest being that the dialogue is in no way believable as human interaction. I, for one, agree with this assessment, yet the dialogue is just so clever and witty that it is easy to forgive the fact that people just can’t think and talk that fast. The show has good plotlines, but the true reason to watch the show is to enjoy all of the different dynamics that the characters experience. There is the mother/daughter/best friends dynamic that Lorelei and Rory share, the doting-grandfathter/

adoring-granddaughter dynamic of Richard and Rory and the controlling/free-spirit battle of wills that Emily and Lorelei have—and there are at least 13 more where those came from.

The show has perennially been snubbed by the Emmys but is the best comedy left standing on the networks.

There are certainly more shows that deserve to be mentioned here. “Nip/Tuck” and “Rescue Me”—especially “Rescue Me”—of FX certainly deserve to be watched in one full sitting. “Futurama” is perhaps the most underappreciated and greatest animated show of our time. There are far too many more to be named, so all I can recommend is to pick up a box set of your favorite show and enjoy one of life’s greatest small pleasures, the complete feeling of satisfaction and sloth that only watching eight episodes of “Gilmore Girls” consecutively can bring.