Tribe and Tide: Navigating Island

Tribe and tide NAVIGATING ISLAND FAMILY LIFE

By Emma Elobeid Pictures Timi Eross

What do you want to be when you grow up? They say. We say. As a society, we seem collectively preoccupied with asking children this rather befuddling question. Like so many of the stock statements we trot out without thought, this one is full of logical fallacies – after all, neither ‘being’ nor ‘growing up’ are fixed states; life is not linear.

It is perhaps no wonder that this particular question is invariably answered by way of a single raised eyebrow (my eldest) and irreverent raspberry blowing (my youngest).

And so, to deflect the heat of this existentially loaded interrogation, I put it to panel.

Among our extended Style of Wight tribe, we have budding vets, promising comic book illustrators and fledgling architects – quite the little co-working community. But the real insight emerges from the follow-up. Take twelve-year-old Noah. He wants to be a scientist and invent things which make life better. “Better for the planet, I mean,” he clarifies. “People (humans) just like things to be easier.” Meanwhile, six-year-old Frankie just wants to “go back and be a child” – which, on deadline days, we all agree is impeccably relatable. Another major flaw in this commonplace childhood question is its fixation on singularity over scope. After all, we are multifarious beings perfectly capable of appreciating

the art in science and vice versa; an aptitude for technology can be put to just as good use in ecology as for engineering. As adults, it is our responsibility to “show, not tell” (says every English Teacher ever) our children the whole world of callings beyond the dressing-up box. Inspiration is everywhere; even more so on the Island. Because what child wouldn’t want to be a planetary geologist after admiring February’s full snow moon rise above Gurnard’s beach huts? What four-year-old wouldn’t be tempted into a vocation as a helicopter pilot after watching an off-shore rescue operation? A rare winter dolphin pod spotted off Ryde Pier might lead to a lifelong mission in marine mammal protection; the sight of sea eagles circling for food could spark an occupation as an ornithologist. This question is contentious too because of its refusal to acknowledge

The pathway through life offers many ‘wobbly bridges to cross’.

‘Becoming’ isn’t something that just happens to us when we ‘Grow Up’

life’s inherent (and glorious) messiness. No matter how carefully we plan ‘our best life’ we sometimes – like an overexcited toddler in a park of possibilities – fall over in the mud before we’ve even started. Climbing the ladder (career or rope) is trickier than it looks and fraught with gaps; there are wobbly bridges to cross; slides that become static midway down. But that’s ok, because ‘Becoming’ isn’t something that just happens to us when we ‘Grow Up’ – life is a constant process of learning and self-discovery. As long as we impart that, everything else will fall into place.