When life gives you MS

officer in a busy inner London Borough, but as more symptoms appeared, this became increasingly difficult to manage. The commute into London, the stressful nature of the job and coping as a newly single parent had a huge impact on the symptoms of my condition.

When Caroline Gray had to take medical retirement, she carved out a career in a new direction.

My first symptoms of multiple sclerosis (MS), which started just after I had my son, were nausea, dizziness and numbness. Three years later, in 1991, I was diagnosed, told there was no treatment, and advised to “go and live your life.”

At the time I was a housing

Ten years later, however, I was still working as an area manager but, feeling unable to cope, I took six months’ sick leave and a year later, after a long fight, I was given ill health retirement. Financially, it was a relief, but it was a very sad end to a 21year career.

However, just because that chapter had ended, I was not able or ready to retire for good. I decided to retrain, went back to college part time and in 2006 qualified as a psychotherapist.

Why psychotherapy? Well, I had been a Samaritan in my 20s, and although that’s very different to counselling, there is a link. It’s similar in that you work with people in distress and trying to find their way through trauma.

I had come through many traumatic events in my own life – loss of my mother, who lived with MS, when I was seven, being diagnosed with MS in my early 30s, my husband leaving me in the same year and then in 2001 my partner of 10 years leaving, and the subsequent loss of my house. So, I felt well placed to understand trauma and the resilience it takes to carry on. I was also keen to get back into education and stretch my mind.

On a practical note, psychotherapy was something I could do from home and sitting down.

In 2007 I set up my own counselling practice at home. This was not as common as it is now and was a bit slow to start, but within a year it was thriving. I could choose my hours, how many clients to see in a day or week, and of course, sit down to work. I was worried how people would cope with my fluctuating appearance, as I sometimes use a crutch or a wheelchair, but it has never been an issue. People accept me as I am and if they ask, I am honest but reassure them it will not affect our work together. Since 2020 with more sessions having to be online this has not been an issue at all and has made it much easier for me.

I will be retiring next year but am so glad I was able to make a second career that fitted in well around my MS.

Kyle Walker lost his job as a mechanic but now he helps to save lives.

Last year I lost my £40,000-a-year job as a mechanic for BMW due to my recent diagnosis of MS. My work tried to help but unfortunately there wasn’t anything we could do.

I was then working for an agency for minimum wage, packing candles in boxes. It was five days a week for little monetary reward, but it built up my employee confidence. This year I applied to get a job as a 999 emergency call handler for East of England Ambulance Service. I have finally found a job I’m passionate about.

My MS affects my walking immensely and I travel to and from work on my road-legal mobility scooter. I have broken down some boundaries with that thing. I use a walking stick almost every day. When I have a bad call at work, I can barely walk away from my desk but management are really helpful, as are my co-workers who even offer to carry my mug of coffee through, or move desks for me so I can sit closer to the toilet. I started this job through an agency, but I’m now proud to have been taken on full time by the ambulance service.

This has been a kind of ragsto-riches story as I genuinely thought I was on the scrap heap after my diagnosis.

There will always be challenges and days where you just break down and your eyes are welling up because you can’t do simple things like change your son’s trousers because it’s exhausting. But I’ve learnt to focus not on wondering what is next, but on what I have now which is two healthy kids and a supportive partner.