RADIANT GLOW The Illuminating Life of KristelAvilus

BY: KELLY OTTE | PHOTOGRAPHY: KIRA DERRYBERRY

First impressions of Kristel Avilus (pronounced Kris-tell) are universal. She has a kind face and a gentle voice. Her eyes are wonderfully expressive and warm. She smiles with her whole face. Her laugh lights up the room. People realize her genuine empathy creates an opportunity to show up as your authentic self. People feel compelled to lean into conversation with her. As you learn more about her, you will understand why she could do anything she sets her mind to and why she has chosen to become the Executive Director of Pace Center for Girls in Leon County. While others congratulate her for landing the position, I’m pulled toward congratulating them for hanging on to her.

For those unfamiliar with Pace Center, it is a center that provides girls and young women with opportunities for a better future through education, counseling, training, and advocacy. Pace’s team of counselors and educators provide free, year-round, middle and high school academic services, counseling, life-skills training, career preparation and more, developing individualized approaches based on each girl’s unique strengths, life experiences, and needs. In their Reach Program, therapists and counselors travel to girls to provide services in their home, school, or in the community to offers social, emotional, behavioral health, and support services for girls ages 11-17 and their families. The staff at Pace genuinely believe that all girls, regardless of their background, deserve opportunities to become strong, compassionate, and successful women. When properly supported, all girls have the power to achieve their vision of success, which leads to positive outcomes for themselves, their families, and the community.

Kristel is a living, breathing example of Pace’s exceptional service, as she seized their opportunities to grow and blossomed into her wildest dreams. One of the most important things about Kristel is that what happened to her and how she overcame are part of the story explaining how she got to this place in her life, but she is so much more than those experiences. If she had allowed herself to buy into the idea that people like her can’t succeed, her life may have turned out completely different. Thank goodness she believed otherwise. Kristel has followed what others term a nontraditional pathway to success. I love that she is unapologetic about her experiences and extraordinarily candid and authentic in a way that provides a brilliant guiding light for others who internalize the judgment of others. As someone who also had a nontraditional trajectory and wasn’t always candid about that, I admire and respect her resilience and optimism.

Kristel’s story has been highlighted several times since she was named Executive Director of Pace Leon in January. Like other people that interviewed Kristel, I initially concentrated on the significant barriers she overcame – she is an immigrant from Jamaica, raised by a single mother, dyslexic, bullied in middle school, got pregnant at 15, and ended up at Pace Center for Girls and started to turn things around.

Those life-changing challenges and obstacles tend to stop people from success, and I recognize the extraordinary distance she has traveled. I urge you to listen to Kristel’s story on Martha Pitts Podcast “Marco Social Work Your Way,” the episode entitled “The Dot Always Connect with Kristel Avilus”. But for Tallahassee Woman Magazine, I want people to know who she is in more ways than the barriers she has overcome. In her own words, “We focus so much on what [I, people, the girls] don’t have, but we really need to focus on what people do have.”

With the utmost respect and admiration for Kristel, I humbly want to tell you about the woman I know, the incredible woman who is more than her challenges.

Kristel Avilus is the first Executive Director of any Pace Center in the state who attended Pace. She is a successful entrepreneur, as she and her husband Jodanis (Joey) Avilus opened the first Black-owned transportation company in Tallahassee, which expanded to other locations in Florida and led to them opening other businesses. She is an extraordinary mother to six dynamite children (ages from two to 21). While giving birth, raising children, and running companies, Kristel earned her AA from Tallahassee Community College and her bachelor’s degree and master’s degree in social work from Thomas University. She successfully passed her exams and became a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, too.

While I was the Executive Director at Pace Leon, Kristel came on as an intern and it didn’t take long for all of us to realize that she was a superstar. She is, first and foremost, a powerhouse social worker who puts the girls front and center in every decision. We offered her a position as the Spirited Girls teacher, and she excelled. While she was in school, we hired her as a Counselor and then promoted her to Social Services Manager, then to Program Director, Acting Executive Director, and, eventually, Executive Director.

Watching her is watching love in action. She invests in the girls wholeheartedly. The more challenging the child, the harder Kristel fights for her, not just because she can see her past self in these young ladies but because she sees herself in their future identities.

I used to counsel her to stop working so much, to stop running about on the weekends to take on family emergencies of the people from the Center. I used to look the other way because I knew she was breaking rules to help whenever she could. She would look at me with her wide-eyed “who, me?” expression on her face. Recently, I watched her interact with a dozen or so of the

Pace students, and they clearly adore her.

Kristel Avilus is her story but she’s more than that. She is hope and love. She has helped thousands of girls and their families. She has the heart of a lioness. She is smart, determined, and authentic. She is very loyal to her family and friends and extremely generous. She is delighted by presents, big and small. She is loving and adventurous. She’s finding out, for the first time, that she belongs in whatever room she wants to be in with whomever she meets. She is deserving of being on the cover of Tallahassee Woman Magazine, and I’m immensely proud to call her my friend.

I asked Kristel to share some insight into herself because what better person to speak on the cover woman than the cover woman herself:

What’s important for people to know about you?

“Just by looking at me, you would never know that I didn’t speak my first word until I was three. At six, I was diagnosed with severe dyslexia. It is important for people to know that even if you have a learning disability, it doesn’t mean you can’t be successful. There’s been so much work to help people retrain their brain to adapt. Another thing people should know about me is that I am a mother of six. This is most important job I have next to being a wife.”_

What is your ‘WHY’?

“I have strong empathy for others and want to ease the pain of those who suffer emotionally. I want people who have barriers in front of them to know they can be and do anything they want, and while others do not have to work as hard to achieve success, that does not matter because their path is paved to success, too.”

What are you core values?

“Family first, kindness, loyalty, compas- sion, and financial security.”

What is your source of strength?

“My family and my faith.”

What has been your greatest challenge?

“My greatest challenge was transitioning from one country to another. At 13, I was very naïve and did not understand the culture or where I fit in. Transitioning was exceedingly difficult, and I was bullied so badly that I contemplated suicide. Thankfully, I overcame this with the amazing team at Pace and the support of my family. Although this may seem strange, but being a teenage mom saved me. When I got pregnant at 15, I was told many times that I had failed and my life was over. When I had my beautiful daughter, I was determined to prove everyone wrong, and that determination propelled me to push hard. I would not have completed high school if not for her.“

What’s one of your favorite quotes?

“Resilience is the need to get up just one more time.” Growing up, I often heard ‘this too shall pass,’ and ‘nothing lasts forever.’ When times are tumultuous, I often draw on those sayings, reminding myself that there is a solution to most problems.”

What’s your definition of success?

“Having a work-family balance. Even though balance is hard to achieve, it is possible. Be intentional about working for an organization that recognizes the need for this balance. A healthy you also benefits the employer. Balance is a culture that I'm trying to incorporate into my current role. I also think you can’t define success by someone else’s path. When people face challenges like I did, we tend to look up to people whose careers we admire and think they’re different than us. I want everyone to know that we’re all taking different paths and some of us must travel farther, but that doesn’t mean we cannot reach success.”

I have forgot a story Kristel told me about when she first had her daughter. People assumed she was an unfit mother because she was a Black teenager. A social service organization tried to give her a book and teach her how to read to her daughter without knowing anything about her, including the fact that she read to her constantly and had a bookshelf full of books at home. The lesson we can learn, or be reminded of, from Kristel’s journey is to recognize brilliance, potential, and capability in all in people. When we stereotype, we strip someone of their individuality and abilities. Unfortunately, not everyone has the resilience to overcome dehumanizing labels. When discouraged, people may turn off hope from the hearts and minds, no longer feeling seen, valued, and supported.

So, what’s the future look like for Kristel Avilus?

Anything she wants it to be. One thing is for certain - the more people that doubt her, the more likely she is to prove them wrong. Right now, she is focused on the girls at Pace and what her team need to be successful. She hit the ground running, has reached out to mentors for guidance, and is working closely with the Board of Directors at Pace Leon to share the life-changing work that happens there.

How do I close an interview with a person I could write about all day? Well, I’ll close with my all-time favorite quote from the cover woman herself: “I lead with love. I was looking around for the right person, and it was me. I was the right person all along.”

If you know a girl who would benefit from Pace, a family who needs someone to talk to, if you would like a tour of the center, or you are inspired to help, call Kristel at 850-922-6062 or email her at Kristel. avilus@pacecenter.org. Tell her Tallahassee Woman Magazine sent you.