Hashtag MomFail

Dad and the pet he never wanted

Written by Jamie Johnson

This article is dedicated to good old Dad and the pet he never wanted. The pet that now follows him from room to room. The pet that he speaks to in a baby voice while giving it table scraps for dinner. The pet that has taken a space on Dad’s side of the bed. The pet he now keeps a picture of on his desk at work.

It’s a story as old as time. The kids want a kitten or a puppy with zero intention of actually taking care of the living, breathing creature. Parents say no and swear to each other that they will not budge. Dad talks about absolutely nothing except how much work it is to have a pet and how he will not be the one taking care of said pet. The kids promise they will take care of the new pet while also cleaning their rooms and doing their homework. Mom shakes her head knowing what is about to happen.

Dad caves. The kids end up with a

pet.

An adorable dog or cat will be picked out because it’s perfect in the eyes of your children. It turns out to be the highest maintenance animal for sale in the tri-state area and immediately costs you hundreds of dollars in vet bills. The pet will come home, and no one will do anything but play with it for days after its worms and kennel cough are finally gone.

Then real life sets in and the pet is making messes. The pet goes to the bathroom on the floor, chews up shoes, and knocks over a lamp while chasing a toy. Dad swears up and down he won’t clean up another mess...while cleaning up another mess.

Dad gives in and potty trains the pet by himself. Despite swearing the pet would never be on the couch, it can almost always be found within petting distance of Dad. Pet can now also shake, sit, and give a high five. They are still working on playing dead and fetching beer from the fridge in the garage.

One week later, the family enters the home to find Dad on the couch snuggling the new pet. It is wearing a sweater and appears to have been recently bathed and blown dry. The new pet appeared in Dad’s Instagram feed with the hashtag #BestPetEver. It now follows Dad everywhere he goes and refuses to eat anything but table scraps for dinner. He also prefers that you sing and pet him while he eats. The dog that was once not allowed to get on the couch continues making an appearance at night on Dad’s side of the bed. Somehow the pet ends up passing out and drooling on mom’s side of the bed, making it impossible for her to sleep. Dad sleeps soundly through the night.

And Dad and his pet lived happily ever after.

This story is dedicated to my husband and his love for our dog, Newman Rockwell Johnson. Newman was supposed to be about 40 pounds. He turned out to be 75. He somehow ends up sleeping on my feet every single night. Logan loves him the most and can be found snuggling Newman on the couch every Sunday. We don’t know his actual birthday, so we celebrate every year on New Year’s Day because it’s easy to remember. Logan cooks Newman a birthday steak each year.

I hope that one day you find the pet you never knew you needed in your life. OP

JAMIE JOHNSON is a full-time working mom to two little boys, wife to Logan, and part-time writer. Her pieces have been featured in HuffPost Parents, Motherly, Today Parents and PopSugar Moms. You can follow her blog at HashtagMomFail.com!

OWENSBORO COMMUNITY & TECHNICAL COLLEGE

OCTC's Veterinary Technology Program

Owensboro Community & Technical College's (OCTC) Veterinary Technology program is housed at OCTC’s Downtown Campus at 1501 Frederica Street and is home to a state-of-the-art veterinary hospital.

Some of the latest equipment includes a realistic canine dental simulator for practicing dental procedures, an equine simulator for performing blood draws, and a brand-new canine surgical and anesthesia simulator used to train students in surgical assisting, proper tissue handling, and anesthesia.

Dr. Laura Boarman, the program coordinator, commented, “The use of simulators allows students to practice and fine-tune technical skills before working on the live patient. Students are confident and more proficient when they get to a real patient. This is a win-win for everyone!”

Upon completing the two-year program, graduates are prepared to sit for the Veterinary Technician National Exam (VTNE). Areas of study include office and hospital procedures, client relations and communications, anatomy, physiology, parasitology, microbiology, clinical techniques, pharmacology, anesthesiology, surgical and medical nursing, radiology, and clinical pathology training. The Veterinary Technology program provides valuable real-world clinical experiences to develop the skills needed to become a valued professional in the field.

The team leading the program is Dr. Laura Boarman, program coordinator, Jacqueline Jackson, and Tara Groves as faculty.

Boarman attended Western Kentucky University for her undergraduate degree and received a Doctorate in Veterinary Medicine from the Auburn University School of Veterinary Medicine. Boarman spent 11 years in practice at Kentuckiana Animal Clinic before transitioning to this leadership role. Her professional interests are in dentistry, preventative medicine, and dermatology.

Jackson has been with OCTC since 2014; she earned her Bachelor of Science degree in Animal Health Technology, with a minor in Equine Science, from Murray State University. Jackson has teaching responsibilities for veterinary lab procedures, parasitology, and clinical laboratory techniques.

Groves has been with OCTC since 2017; she earned her Bachelor of Science in Animal Health Technology from Murray State University. Groves currently teaches the Introduction to Veterinary Technology course and Anatomy lab.

OCTC’s Veterinary Technology program is selective admission. The deadline to apply for the following Class of 2025 is May 1, 2023. Admission requirements include a 2.7 GPA, ACT score of 18+, 16-hour observation with a licensed Veterinary technician, and applicants must take the TEAS exam. The Vet Tech Program does not require any general education courses, but applicants receiving a 'C' or better in the following courses will receive additional consideration: MAT 150 (3), BIO 112/113 (4), AHS 120 (1). Students who complete the program are eligible to sit for the Veterinary Technical National Examination (VTNE) certifying exam. This program is accredited by the Committee on Veterinary Technician Education and Activities (CVTEA). Upon graduation, there is a broad range of career opportunities for licensed Vet Techs, including various specialties— dentistry, equine medicine, anesthesia, physical rehabilitation, etc.