The Alter of Ego Mary K. Maturo

THE ALTER OF EGO

Fiction by Mary K. Maturo

Superheroes are manufactured. Corporate creations of accidental mutations and alien lifeforms captured by animal control. I was sixteen when the offer was given, and I was a child with aspirations not get to choose for myself was slapped onto me. Many teens search for their identity, but I could not forget mine. It was emblazoned on my chest like a cattle brand. It was taboo to speak of the secret, but a child of greatness. They dangled the world in front of my eyes and told me of the altruism in my role. I accepted. I signed myself away.

What did it feel like, you may ask, for the blood of superhumans to course through my veins? It is a painful dull ache that serves as a reminder of my own foolishness. The mutation started like a shortness of breath, easily mistaken as asthma until my running turned to bursts of speed without a way to stop. A rash prickled my arms until my skin changed colors. I saw rich brown turn to ashen green. Someone told me my skull reshaped itself and my eyes would never recover. I was dying, so I could live like no one else.

The training began in dark lifeless labs, and my body grew accustomed to regimental muscle memory. A long list of things to remember, and words I could never pronounce zipped past my ears like the speed of my feet. A name I did confides regardless. My friends began to fear me. What happens when one stops fearing war? I began with the belief that my powers could fix the world, but each moment left it with one more piece missing. I was a calf sent out to slaughter the bull, and he knew the field better than I ever could. Yet, he was careful and concise. He was considerate in ways I could not be. His damage was cleaned, and the costs were reimbursed. My carnage was messy and unapologetic. There was death in my wake. Masks can hide identity, but humanity still can be seen, and I realized all at once I had never asked why I was sent to destroy him. He was a father. I was a child. He wanted his family. I wanted my fame. I had become the villain without ever knowing the game.