14 minute read
Patience Always Wins
Monica Hawthorne
Patience Always Wins
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By Tonya Dixon Photos by Santana B Photography
At one point, Monica Hawthorne thought things couldn’t be any better in her life. She was happily married. Had a thriving hair salon in Charlotte, North Carolina, and her family were safe and healthy. But in one instant, it all changed. She found herself single, dealing with an undiagnosed illness and a declining business and bank account. Before she knew it, she found herself back in Greensboro, living with her mother and making countless trips to the doctor. But as she looks back on it, it was nothing short of God’s divine hand upon her life. She gained more than she ever had before, physically, spiritually and emotionally. However, it didn’t seem divine at the time.
“God directed me to come back home to Greensboro. I thought I was hearing things because I thought there was no way HFe was telling me to leave. I was doing well in Charlotte. My business was thriving and I was successful,” said . “But I did what I heard God say. I packed up and moved.”
With her life virtually upended and turned inside out, Hawthorne had to do something she had previously never really done. She had to relinquish control to gain restoration. She had to depend on someone else. “I stayed on my mom’s couch for nearly three years because I had serious health problems and God wouldn’t allow me to do anything else,” she said. “I prayed and had many conversations with Him. I was going through a lot mentally and physically and I was practically broke because I was supporting my daughter in college.” “I left my source of income in Charlotte. I virtually started over. I had to come back to Greensboro and rebuild my business and myself. A licensed minister, Hawthorne admits she “ran” from God and her calling for more than 15 years. She had a people problem. “I was concerned about what people would say. What would they think of me?” she said.
But it was in her weakest moment when she heard God as clear as she heard him say move back to Greensboro. She received the instruction and strength she needed to begin her journey of restoration and wholeness for herself and for other women.
“God told me the I didn’t need to be concerned about the opinions or actions of anyone else. He said I was already qualified, verified and approved by Him, so I didn’t need to seek approval or validation from man because He had already given me that,” said Hawthorne. It was at that moment that she spiritually and physically birthed her ministry, a new business and strength to regain her footing as a hair stylist. But she says founding “GOoD GIRL” (intentionally spelled with mixed case) has been the most profound and rewarding because it impacts everything else in her life. “I thought I would call it ‘GOod GIRL,’ because it symbolizes being a light, knowing your worth and getting approval only from God,” said Hawthorne. “But then one day God said, ‘you’re a good girl, but I want you to make one of those “Os” very small so that you can see me in it.’ And that’s how it became what it is today.”
After developing a logo, Hawthorne designed a few shirts and the rest is more than just history. It’s a situation she believes only God could have orchestrated and ordained.
“I hadn’t even planned to launch it until May 2020, but COVID hit and everything changed. As soon as they were released, women from all over were buying the shirt,” she said. “So that’s how it started. But there’s more. There’s a community component for all kinds of women. Young, old, every race and every background.” Ultimately, she says the mission of GOoD GIRL is to teach women that they are enough and only need God’s approval. Plain and simple. “I want girls and women to know you don’t need that [blue] check on Facebook. You don’t need that [blue] check on Instagram. You are already verified. It’s about women learning who they are in God,” she said.
It’s important to note that Hawthorne continued to suffer from a mysterious illness for many years. She was in and out of hospitals and doctor’s offices, without receiving a definitive diagnosis. It took a serious toll on her life, to the point where she couldn’t fulfill the requests of her salon clientele. Yet and still, there was still a blessing amid her illness. “I had issues for 10 years and didn’t even know what it was until I moved back to Greensboro and I think that was a blessing within itself because God knew and he told me to come home. As soon as I went home, I got extremely sick. I needed to be home because if I had been in Charlotte, I would not have had any one to help me care for myself,” she said. “I needed to be at home with my mom who was helping me. She understood that God brought me back home for a reason even though at the time I wasn’t sure exactly what it was, but I was trusting him.” “It turned out to be my gallbladder, but it was affecting my whole body. It would take me down for 2-4 weeks at a time. Imagine having no income and being so sick you can’t get up. But it’s important to remember, even when things look bad in the natural, there’s always a blessing though God.” As much as she struggled, she was able to resurrect her salon – Hawthorne Hair Studio. Not only did she rebuild her clientele, she realized it was another part of her ministry. God strategically sent clients that needed spiritual, emotional and mental restoration. She admits, it had nothing to do with her. It was all a GOoD GIRL thing. “I’m really ready to retire from that,” she jokes. “But God hasn’t released me from it yet. For some reason this salon has been a place for people to get renewed and repaired. People come and they get what they need from God when they are here. If they need it, I pray with and for them. It goes down in here some days, but it’s part of my Ministry. I used to say I have a ministry behind the chair. I asked God to meet people here when I first opened the salon and that’s what he’s been doing.” While Hawthorne is passionate about hair and is known for her precision cuts and styles, she’s looking to expand in a different way – one that she says doesn’t necessarily require her to stand on her feet behind the chair as much. She’s looking into her own hair product line, including everything from washing supplies to equipment.
“I already have my own hair oil, but I’m working on my own hair shampoo and other products and styling tools – blow dryers, curling irons, flat irons,” she said. Just like GOoD GIRL empowers women, she plans to use her styling expertise to help others as well. “I’ve taught before and I want to continue, but not in a traditional setting with multiple students. I prefer individual classes so that I can give one-on-one attention.”
As Hawthorne expands her product line, she isn’t leaving GOoD GIRL behind. There’s much more to come and there are many more lives to impact. “GOoD GIRL is much more than a t-shirt. It might be how I got my foot in the door with some people, but it’s ministry. It’s more motivational speaking. It’s expanding on the books and series’ I’ve already written.” But most important, Hawthorne says it’s about lifting someone else up along the way. h
To learn more about GOoD GIRL Apparel, please visit their website at www.goodgirlgoodguy.shop 336-740-4090
By Dorjae McClammey Photos by Jamey Jenkins
He wants everyone to have an ear for this. Hello Black Man.
Jamey Jenkins, husband, father, and entrepreneur. Born and raised in Mississippi, he grew up in the small town of Hazelhurst. As a student at Hazlehurst High School, he was involved with the debate team, basketball team, and eventually graduated at the top of his class with honors in 1997. Next, he enrolled at the well-known HBCU, Alcorn State University, majoring in Political Science Pre-Law. He was also inducted into the Kappa Alpha Psi fraternity. After graduating in 2002, Jamey received a job at the automotive giant Nissan North America and much like everything else in his life, was able to work himself to the top. Starting as a Technician, he then moved up to Lead Tech, then to Supervisor, and currently serves as Lead Manager.
Growing up, Jamey had a real simple life. He was raised by a hard-working single mother, and shares he didn’t ask for much, but his mother always made him feel like he had the world. He met his father while he was in high school, and the connection they made he shares, was so amazing it was like they never missed a beat. “If someone were to tell you that we didn’t grow up together, you wouldn’t believe it,” he says. “I didn’t feel any resentment towards my father and decided that instead of focusing on the past I was going to keep moving forward with our relationship.”
Growing into manhood Jamey acquired a family of his own. He was married and got divorced, producing a son in his union. His son came to live with him for a while, and he figured out quickly that their communication style was quite different. “I wanted to find the best way to adapt to him and his needs instead of my son trying to adapt to me as the parent,” he says. Jenkins used this knowledge to create a list of things he wanted his son to know about him, which involved creating questions for them to ask each other. While writing down things he wanted his son to know about him, Jamey realized that he didn’t know a lot about his dad. He knew the basic things but not who he was as a person. So, as he continued to write down all these questions and something came to his mind. “I realized that if I put all these questions together in journal form, then I would have an almost perfect autobiography,” he says. Starting with 250 questions he thought if the question did not make you pause, it wouldn’t be added to the journal. So that removed all of the basic questions and narrowed it down to 52 questions, equaling one question a week for an entire year. All the questions were thought-provoking and intriguing, focusing on finances, future endeavors, and love. The kind of questions and answers that don’t come up in everyday conversations. He knew he was onto something and In November 2019, the Hello Black Man Journal was created.
He didn’t stop there, as he has created a series of interactive journals that are designed to help members of the African American community dig deep within and learn things about themselves that they would have never thought of. The Hello Black Man Journal has been well designed and is easily comprehensible. One side allows space for a quote and/or question, and the other side has a space for the reader to journal and reflect.
Jamey didn’t stop with Hello Black Man. He has created a journal for just about everyone. After Hello Black Man, he wrote Hello Black Woman, which is inspired by his daughter, wife, and mother. There is also Hello Black Child. With this addition, Jamey wanted to open up the mind of the young person and jumpstart their communication abilities and provide a safe and trusting place to get everything in their mind out and show someone what they are going through. With Hello Black Teenager Jamey, wanted something that can help teens and adults connect better. “I feel as though teenagers today have it way harder than I did. With social media being a big factor in a teenager’s life I wanted a place for young adults to get their emotions and thoughts out somewhere other than online,” he says. There is also Hello Black Couple which is meant for two people to write and connect. Jamey has had couples who’ve been married 40 plus years tell him that they didn’t know half of the things about their partner they thought they did. This journal strives to reopen deep communication between new and current partners. Hello Black First Responder is for the people who are so unique and mentally trained and are sadly constantly fighting between career and community. A space for those people, paramedics, firefighters, and law enforcement who see a lot, finally have a place to release what they’ve been holding in.
Then there’s the Journey Journal. Jamey wanted to create an avenue for everyone in the world to be able to start their transition to be more open and connected with themselves. Finally, there is the Hello Black Entrepreneur. As someone who has multiple businesses, he is no stranger to the hustle. “In our community, we grind, we are hustlers, and hard workers. Yet I feel as though the community does not do a great job at writing the details down of what we are doing and so this journal is for those who need an outline for when they need to go back for a reference, or when they start a new business, they know how they did it the first time and will be able to do it again with less hassle. I’ve had more phone calls about that journal in the last three months than Hello Black Man in the last year.”
Jamey has what others may call an “unreal” motivator, which is time. Time pushes him to be more connected with his business, family, and surroundings. It pushes him to have a business that will be impactful forever. He wants his products to be so impactful, that in the next 100 to 200 years, someone will be able to pick them up and still be inspired. He wants to use his journals to make history in the black community also. “If my grandson’s, grandson’s grandson needs help or motivation, he can see what I wrote, and hopefully it will drive him to a better place,” he says.
Jamey Jenkins
Hello Black Man www.helloblackman.com
Even though he’s not huge on accolades, Jamey feels most accomplished when he sees his work in action. He says a client’s appreciation, feedback, and recognition is all the reward he needs. Most of all, being able to find a way to connect with his kids better is his biggest accomplishment. Moving forward, Jamey currently has two more journals in the work, Hello Black Student and Hello Black Educator. He feels like this group of people don’t get the respect nor pay they deserve. “Because they give to the youth in the community, I want to give them an avenue to talk about their careers, express their emotions, and be able to unwind. My goal is to put my journals into millions of hands who need a safe space to unwind,” he says.
The Covid 19 pandemic has put a hold on The Hello Black Man Conference, though Jamey and his team have been working hard to bring it back for the Spring of 2022. That will also be the celebration of their third-year mark.
Jamey is a down to earth kind of guy. His favorite dish to prepare is frozen pizza. His top three movies are Heat with Al Pacino and Robert De Niro, Tombstone, and Shawshank Redemption. He is also a world-renowned spade player, “spadesologist” and has received the City-Wide Spades trophy in Mississippi. h
To learn more about Jamey Jenkins and Hello Black Man, please visit his website.
