The Cascade Friday, February 5, 2010

Bearing the torch since 1993

Friday, February 5, 2010

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THE CASCADE

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

Sex! Sex! SEX! About sex columnists SONJA SZLOVICSAK for student papers (I guess there EDITOR-IN~O--IIEF is truth to the saying "sex sells." he Cascadehas a second sex columnist this week. Jack Daniels has been added as an occasional male counterpart to Virgi nla Slims. Don't expect to see his column every week, but he's not going lo be a one time thing.

I'm noting this because I'd like to head off the inevitable complaints I'm going to receive about Daniels. The funny thing is, sex columns are usually one of the most popular columns in a student newspaper. At the national conference for the Canadian University Press, I found out that every paper's sex columnist causes a few complaints. I also found out that the sex column is, across the board, the most widely read column in a student paper.

In other words, Virginia Slims is not unique - she's not some abomination that the Cascadehas allowed to defile our pages. Slims, and now Daniels, are the norm

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That's not always a good thing).

Every now and then, I get an email from an outraged student or faculty member complaining about Virginia Slims. For some reason, these people think I would arbitrarily censor a writer. The Cascadeprints these complaints; we always welcome the feedback.

The complaints the Cascadegets about Slims seem to have a similar tone; the complainant finds some• thing offensive about some content in the article, and they want to see the column cut. Of course, when a paper starts cutting articles so as not to offend anyone, they begin to walk a very fine line. When you get into the habit of cutting articles to keep from offending someone, what to cut - and what not to cut - is not as black and white as it seems.

What bothers me is that people seem to want to take the "Hear no evil, see no evil" attitude when it comes to sex. A few issues ago,

we had a complaint because Slims wrote about pornography. There seems to be this strange idea floating around that pornography destroys families and lets all kinds of evil out into the world. I don't know how i.t commits all these evil acts; I imagine that one of the spouses, in theory, would become so addicted lo pornography that he or she would spend copious amounts of time wanking off, rather than engaging in wholesome family activities like Scrabble and Monopoly.

What is an actual, well documented problem is some women's lack of interest in sex as they get older. Since there is no little blue pi 11for women, they do need to try new things to get aroused. Pornography is one of those "new things" women could try to rekindle their" interest In sex.

Unfortunately, there is a taboo that surrounds women watching pornography; talking about this taboo is the only way to remove it. l'm not trying to suggest that

everyone begin to watch pornography, have sex in public places and masturbate 50 times a day; however, I do suggest that people stop and think before they send me a self righteous letter. Sex isn't bad - and in case you haven't noticed, Virginia Slims does not run in the Sports and Health section.

Her column runs, every week, in the Arts and Life section (actually, previousl,y it ran in the "Stuff" section, but we decided that "Stuff" was a lame name, so "Stuff" is no more). It's supposed to be entcrtain ing. It's satirical, it's funny and it's supposed to be ,a little racy. This is a student newspaper; students at UFV are adults. Our student union gives out free condoms. This campus is for adults, not small children.

People have sex - and not always in missionary position. Unless someone can come up with a reasonable and logical argument for why the Cascadeshould cut our sex columnists, they're going to continue to run.

Volume 18 • Issue 4 Ruom CI027 1184 J K111~ Road Alil,ot,fo1d,

BC

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Editor-In-Chief cascade.chlef@ufv.ca So11J,tS1lm,11,,tk

ManagingEditor cascade.manager@ufv.ca I nv1, V,111 Dvk

ProductionManager cascade.production@ufv.ca R,111do11,1 C.0111 ad

Production

JedMinor Copy Editor Su,.11111t'

Kmell

News & Opinion Editor cascade.news@ufv.ca Paul Br.immtr

Arts & Life Editor cascade.arts@ufv.ca Paul hdardt·.t11 get things started: 1. The board be split into two: I am very happy to see that The left side for rides to UFV and the right side for rides from UFV. one of the boards in C building 2. All ride offers/requests be (Abbotsford) has been dedicated to ads for carpooling. To whom- written on standard index card ever spearheaded this: thank you. size forms, to be provided. These forms should be printed on differIt's about time we've had a board for this - after all we've got lots ent colors to make them easier to of boards for putting up other identity: a. Pink/Orange for rides ofads (such as textbooks, room for nmt, etc.), so why not a cause that fered to UFV wou Id be of intercst to many of us? b. Green/Yellow for rides ofAfter all, there arc many staff and fered from UFV c. While for ride requested students who drive to UFV with The filled-out form can then be plenty of empty seats. And some of them could probably use some pinned either to the right side or the left side depending on whethextra money for gas.

But speaking of the other ads, er the offer/request is for a ride to I am very concerned though that or from UFV this board too will become ch.it• 3. Trips at different times be broken up. If Kim arrives at UFV tered and messy. The community boards are always full of overlap- at 10:45on Tuesdays and Thursday ping ads in the first two weeks of but arrives at 8:15 on Wednesday, each semester - and I would hate then it would be best to post the to see the carpool board share the Tuesday/Thursday 10:45 arrival trip on one ad, and post a !;eparate same fate.

Thus, I propose that we create ad for the 8:15 arrival on Wednessome informal rules / etiquette to days.

Dear Editor,

4. Round trips be broken up into one-way trips. It would probably be clearer for both ride seekers and ride offerors if each separate trip was posted as a sep,arate ad. Due to everyone's schedules, a person needing a ride (let's call her Jen) might leave from Maple Ridge to UFV with Mike, but return to Maple Ridge with Brie.

5. Pins/tacks as well as a pencil or two also be provided.

J know some of this sounds confusing, especially about breaking up trips, but I think that it might be the best way to run a paper-based ridesharc initiative. Even formal carpool programs like Jack Bell can get a little complicated. (Their vanpool system works pretty well, though).

If we can make ride sharing and carpooling successful, it would be a very nice way for the school to better function as a community.

We'd all gel to meet more people and perhaps participate more in events at school (it is virtually impossible for any non-driver living

outside of Abbotsford/Mission to take a evening course or participate in intramurals due to lack of public transit).

I'm aware that there arc already some staff and students who share rides. But having to ask your peers "does anyone go to/from this place at about this time and has a seat available?" can be a rather daunting task. I hope that that will be no longer.

I'll going ahead and putting out some of these "suggested" standardized ad forms out on the board this week. If l'm stepping on anyone's toes - I'm sorry, but I just w;mt to make sure that the great idea that has been started gets off to a good start.

Kevin Au Any opinions expressed in this letter are those of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of the UFV Student Union Society or the UFV Senate.

FEB12

FEB5, 6

FEB7

FEB12

ValleyConcert Society ~ Trio Voce

CascadesAthletics

Valentine'sTheme Poetry Slam

A s1>ectacularnew 1>ianotrio that is rocking the internation• al and American chamber music scene, thrilling audiences with their passion, enthusiasm and ability to make the written music come alive.

UFVMen's Basketball 1>lay Friday against Trinity Western University Spartans at UFVat 7 1>.111., and Saturday against Trinity Western University at UFVat 7 p.m.

Meet and Greet the RussianOlympic Skaters

The concert takes place at the Matsqui CentennialAuditorium, 32315 South Fraser Way, 011 February 5th at 7.30 p.m.

For ticket information visit www.valleyconcertsoclety.com

UFVWomen's Basketball play Fridayagainst Trinity Western University Spartans at UFVat 6 11,111.1 and Saturday against Trinity Western University S1>artansat UFVat 5 p.m.

All games are 1llayedat the Envision Athletics Centre.

Admission is free.

Join in on the community barbeque and come out to meet and greet the Russian skating team at Abbotsford Recreation Centre - 2499 McMillan Road.

On February 7th, from 2.30 p.m. to 5.00 p.m.

Everyoneis welcome.

Love hurt so much last year we had to do it again. Just like last year poets register immediately before the perfor• mance and have three minutes to present an original poem.

Judgesare randomly selected from the audience. It's just you and the mike. Love or angst 1>oetryis suggested but not mandatory. For more information call 604- 792-0025, local 2471.

Doors open and poets register in the UFVChilliwack theatre lobby at 7 p.m. The slamming starts at 7:30 1>.m.

Sports & Health Editor cascade.sports@ufv.ca BritrJny Wil'\nC'r

Staff Writers Orlcwicz Jot'l Sm.i.rt

Ju,tin

.Jordan Pitlhc·r lr~·vor Fik

Contributors Jo11a1h,U1Bayrotk R;1y ()<' Kroon Ltgrt Hvtil Mcliss,1 Kt'ndzil'rskt

Kt'lldr,1 MtPhee Rhys Murley Mnrin,1 Par,1pi11i T..irry Pond.mu·

S,in1h Spillrn.111

Printed By Co,1s1,dWd> Pres\ The Cascade is UFV's autonomou~student newspaper.It providci;11forum for UFVstudents to huve theirjournalism published. It also a~'tsa.~llll alternative press for the Fra.,;cr Valley.The Ca.,;cudc is funded with Ul•V student fim1l\.The Ca.scndl·is publisht"devery Friday with a t'in:ulutionof 2000 mid is di,tributed at UFVca.mpusc~and thro11j!hout Abbotsford.Chilliwack,nnd Mission.The C'a,;cudc is a member of lhc Canad111n Umversttyl'n:ss.n nationalcooperauvc of 75 univcr..ilyand college newspapers from Victoriaw St. John\.111c Cascade follow,the CUP ethic.ii policy concerning materialof ll prejudicialor oppn:ss1vcmllun:.

Submissk\Jlsm·e111\•fom:d lt1elt>ctronic formntcilhcr throughc-muil or on CD. Please send submissions111".IAl" or ".<foe"fonnnt o,1ly.

Artick:sund lt•ncr..Lothc ooitormust be typ,:d.TI1c Cuscadct'C!\Crvcs the right 10 edit suhmissiunsfor clwity w1dlength.

11teCa.,;cudcwill not print uny urt1clcs thulcontain mdst. sexist. homophobie or lihcllou, n1111cnt The writer\ name and studentnumber musl tic submtl· red with cad1,uhmi,\ion. Lener, to the editor must be wtc.lcr250 words tf inlendcdfor print. Only one lctt(·rlo the editor per writer in any given ~~lilion.

Opinionsc~prcsscddo not ncccssiuily n·llcct tllnt ol UFV, Case.tu~stllfl wld collcc1ivc.

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FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

3

ExpertsSay EducationKey to BeatingHumanTrafficking TREVORFIKtarget vulnerable groups (women, STAFF WRITER children, recent immigrants).

Jn terms of the severity of the Human trafficking, though one problem internationally, Danduof the most profitable worldwide rand explained that Canada is a black markets, is still a practice country of destination, or transishrouded in mystery. tion, for those being trafficked.

The Salvation Army held a fo- "There are definitely many counrum on Jan 29 at the University tries where the problem is far of the Fraser Valley to attempt to worse. By and large the problem is educate individuals on the issue of often affecting people in countries modern-day slavery. of origin," Dandurand said.

Among the speakers at the event Countries of origin are places was the University of the Fraser where victims originate from. AlValley's own Yvon Dandurand. though the problem Is worldwide Dandurand, who currently serves in scale, individuals often are as the associate vice-president of taken from relatively poor nations graduate and research studies on and low-income districts. campus, and has been heavily inCanada has responded to the volved in assisting the Canadian issue of human trafficking more government with research initia- rapidly than most countries, but tives related to human trafficking. still lags far behind a reasonable Dandurand began his presenta- response to the issue, according to tion with a summary of the cur- Dandurand. Dandurand said that rent slate of the problem of hu- the main hindrances to the end man trafficking in Canada. Most of human trafficking arc: limited statistics, Dandurand said, have knowledge on the topic, issues to be approached with a degree with defining the problem, and of skepticism, as estimates for re- the fact that human trafficking is a cording and tracking cases of hu- crime that is constantly evolving. man trafficking are often based "In order to put an end to the on assumptions. This is due to the crime of human trafficking and fact that data on the topic is sparse; better assist individuals affected Canada has only recently begun by it, we have to find better ways compiling records with relation to to identify victims. Job number human trafficking. one is to protect victims," DanduCanada currently has 30 cases rand said. of human trafficking under invesDandurand cited the recent tigation, according to Dandurand. earthquake in Haiti as an examHuman trafficking activity often ple. According to Dandurand, the yields high profits (second only to devastation of the quake has given drug trafficking in terms of profits rise to criminal groups disguised for organized crime groups), with as orphanages, who facilitate the less risk then drug trafficking. fraudulent adoptions of children Dandurand noted that gangs often from the country. In order to prop-

erly combat the problem of human trafficking, cooperation between countries attempting to enact uniform legislation and human trafficking law needs to be instilled, according to the speaker.

Although the focus of the forum was on trafficking for the purpose of sexual exploitation, Dandurand added that there are many other forms of human trafficking. Trafficking individuals in order to force them into labour or involuntary servitude is also on the rise, as it provides individuals with a cheap, alternative measure to hiring local employees.

The next presenter, Diane Sowden, spoke about the sexual exploitation of children bought and sold in thl.!human trafficking trade.

Sowden notes that although the establishment of a Vancouver Police Department unit to trap online predators (similar lo the "bait car" program) has been effective in deterring traffickers from lurlng underage individuals on the Internet, it is still not enough to stop "the average John." "The program may make the first time offender think twice about approaching an individual online, but will do nothing to deter the average sex offender," Sowden added.

Sowden estimated the average profile of a "John" in the Lower Mainland is someone who is 38 years old, of Caucasian ethnic· ity, half of whom are married and have children.

Sowden's organization, Children of the Streets Society, currently helps assist children who

have been forced into the human trafficking trade. They have been successful in providing over 500 workshops to 26,000 youth across the lower mainland, attempting to instill prevention measures into young individuals.

"Education at an early stage is key in helping youth realize there are alternatives to ending up on the streets," Sowden explained.

However, Sowden said that funding for these types of programs has been cut on an almost regular basis by the provincial government, making it difficult for success in the field to be realized.

Major Winn Blackman, the women's ministries director for the Salvation Army in B.C., was the evening's next presenter.

Blackman's presentation was a summary of the research findings the Salvation Army has completed thus far. The focus of their research has been centred around identifying the next step in addressing the problem of human trafficking for the purpose of sexual exploita· tion.

Blackman added: "If we don't address the demand, we will never properly address the supply."

The demand normally consists of individuals who arc attempting to seek out the services of a prostitute not solely for sexual purposes. Instead, Blackman noted, "The issue ls less about sex, and more about power."

The final speaker was Janneke Lewis, lawyer and advocate at North Shore Law. Lewis's presentation centred on the debate sur-

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rounding the legalization of prostitution.

Lewis spent much of her presentation dispelling the myths of legalization, using the Netherlands and Germany as examples.

Striking on one key point behind decriminalization, Lewis said that child prostitution in the Nether• lands increased 400 per cent after the legalization of prostitution.

Legalization advocates often cite protection of children as a prime reason behind decriminalizing prostitution.

As Lewis noted, "There docs not currently exist any data that points towards a safe avenue for prostitution."

With the Olympic Games in Vancouver only days away, The Provincenewspaper has run a piece on the demand for escorts and their services that will come with an influx of tourists from across the globe. Many arc concerned that the Games will bring with them the "systems" that are "often put in place to satisfy the demand for paid sex. Unfortunately, this is likely to be the case during the Winter Olympics."

Many individuals arc also widely promoting increased work for sex trade workers by "encouraging women in an economic recession to take to the road," according to Suzie Davis, a sex worker advocate.

The RCMP has maintained the position that human trafficking for the purposes of sex will not rise with the advent of the Games.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

4

UFV Instructor Questions Afghan Handover PAUL BRAMMER NEWS& OPINIONEDITOR

SARAH SPILLMAN CONTRIBUTOR

The Commander of the NATO led forces in Afghanistan has expressed a desire for Afghani forces to take control of the country as soon as possible.

General Stanley McChrystal said to the FinancialTimes, "I bc1ieve that a political solution to all conflicts ls the inevitable outcome.

And it's the right outcome [in Afghanistan]."

This comes two months after General McChrystal urged President Obama to commit an extra 40,000 American troops to the military operation in Afghanistan.

President Obama ultimately committed 30,000 troops, bringing the total number of American troops in the country to over 100,000.

"As a soldier, my personal feeling is that there's been enough fighting," added McChrystal,."You just really don't make progress, politically, during fighting. What I think we do is try to shape conditions which allow people to come to a truly equitable solution to how the Afghan people are governed."

According to the Guardian,British Prime Minister Gordon Brown "said that the handover process [in Afghanistan] should get under way this year, and that at least five Afghan provinces should be hand· ed over by the end of 2010."

Any handover of power in Afghanistan would involve elements of the Taliban. According to AFP,

University ofAlberta considers outsourcing toGoogle

"TI1e White House ...did not rule out Afghan President Hamid Karzai's plan to ask for Taliban names to be removed from a UN blacklist to spur reconciliation."

"White House spokesman Robert Gibbs noted that top US generals David Petraeus and Stanley McChrystal had drawn parallels between Afghanistan and recon· ciliation schemes that had worked with £actions in Iraq.''

Ron Dart, political science instructor at UFV, doubts whether the current political make-up of Afghanistan can shoulder the burden of leading the country without international help. "fn Afghani-

stan now, it's still so divided. Kar· zai controls the Kabul area; and so the notion that somebody rules the country, of course he doesn't." ''Who does Karzai represent? ...

You see, I<arzai is very much in one sense a dancing bear of American interests, and his whole approach to moving Afghanistan in the future tends to be very much in the pocket of what many see as American."

Dart also questioned the idea that Afghanistan can be unified as a country, due to its historical context as a deeply divided and tribalistic nation. "The more you move in a certain direction of Al-

plays aroleinmental illness Opposition leaders speak outagainst Media prorogation

Qaeda Taliban, you're in a very strong, almost Pan-Islamic nationalism that secs the west itself as the problem ...And so to the degree that Karzai can distance himself from the west, he won't, because he realizes that it's the troops in the Kandahar and Kabul area that support his very fragile hold on power.

"So I don't know how you could possibly broker peace between a Karzai-led government which tends to be pro-western and the Taliban which sees the west as a source of the mother of all problems in the Middle East. And then the war lords, which are more regional, are just protecting their interests."

Dart cited the attacks on the World Trade Center as a large part of the psychological reason for America's continued involvement in Afghanistan. "I think 9/11 is branded so deeply in the flesh of the American psyche that to attempt to, or to plan to, withdraw from Afghanistan is, for many Americans, to be a naive idealist...

And so [Obama] can't make a decision to pull out of Afghanistan, given the fact that most Americans would argue that's the roots of9/11.

"It's sort of a game• an intellectual level of one extreme says, 'You have to act, because if you don't act and we don't have troops there we're going to have another 9/11.'

Well the question is, how do you act? Is it 40,000 troops? Is it 30,000?

Is it 20,000? Or, is it coming in and doing more aid, is it coming with more development, ls it schools, is

Ontario college faculty setstrike deadline

it education, ls it wells, is it better agriculture? ls that the way you deal with it? ... [However,) you have to have a stable area to do aid development, which takes a military presence."

Dart confirmed that President Obama also has to contend with the factions within the American political community that believe that even 100,000American troops in Afghanistan is not enough,."The other extreme [is] get as many troops in there and just beat down, destroy that country. Root out the foxes...Sohe has to be careful of not playing into a na\"vcidealism and on the other hand not pandering to a hawkish aggressiveness ...So he's on a ra.:or's edge in terms of trying to please both sides, but of course, never pleasing either side. Trying to find his way through this one, you've got to have the Wisdom of Solomon at that level. ''9/11 has impressed on the American people [that] they're vulnerable at home ... 9/11 has left an imprint on them that [they] have to have very vigilant security. It's the same question of what's going on in the airports, [with the] x-rays.

But for most people, the chance of a plane being bombed is probably less than one percent. But what if?

And it's always the 'what if' argument. And so, there's immense security put in place for the 'what if.' And that's what [Obama] faces.

What if they come again? What if they come again, and I've put my pistols backin my holster?"

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faculty InOntario arereadytowalkoff Electronics consumers could besuffering from Lastweekend's cross-country protest against You can'tunderstand health anddisease without College thejob.

Stephen Harper's move tosuspend Parliament understanding soclal relations, saysmedical upgrade woessoonenough, sincepractically sociologist Juanne Nancarrow Clarke.

Intheentertainment Industry Istalking Ontario's college teachers haveseta Feb11strike everyone attracted 27,000 people fromcoasttocoast.

Liberal leader Michael lgnatleff wasamong the Clarke, alsoa professor ofsociology atWilfrid deadline.

IftheOntario Public Service Employees about3DTV. University, studies thesoclal construction Union, representing Ontario's 9,000 college teach- 3DTVs aretelevlslons capable ofdlsplaylng obthreeleaders whoaddressed theOttawa crowd Laurler anagreement withColleges jectsinthree-dimensional andwalked around totalktopeople onParllaofIllness Inthemassmedia withparticular focus ers,havenotreached space.

However, there's ondepression andheartdisease.

Ontario bythatdate,theunionwillstrike. onesnag- everyone willhavetowearglasses to mentHIii onJan23.

"What Inoticed whenIwasonmycross-coun- "It'sImportant forustounderstand thatIllness Is •wedonotseefurther votesatthistimeasbeing experience thetechnology.

Montgomery, chairoftheOPS EU Thefirstsetswereunveiled trytouroftheuniversity campuses Isthatthe essentially asocial construct andthatthedefinl- productlve;Ted atthe2010Consumer supposedly 'couldn't-care-less generation' was tlonoflllness andtheexperience ofIllness are bargaining team,announced ata pressconfer- Electronic Show InVegas andwillbeavailable for purchase asearlyasthissummer.

Companies like enceonFeb1. verysteamed aboutprorogation.

Whowould linked tosociety; saysClarke. toanendthecontinuing uncer- Sony, Samsung, Dream Works Animation 5KG and havethought, whowould have(known)?" said While scientists continue todebatetheorigins of "Inordertobring lgnatieff. depression, Itsmainstream portrayal shifted from talnty, theunionwillbesetting a strike deadline; Technicolor arepushing veryhardtopromote It. hetoldreporters atOPSEU's headoffice inToronto. "They'll havetodecide Iftheywanttogodown ofthedisease toanother overtime.

ThatwasthedayParliament wassettoresume onemodel Depression, sheexplains, Isrepresented differthatpathornot," saysCarlParry, salesrepresenta• Montgomery alsosaidthathedoesnotseethe sittinguntilItwassuspended attheendoflast impending strike asa labour relations Issue, but year byStephen Harper untilMarch afterapproval entlyacross various social groups, tlveforAtlas Audio Video InVictoria, B.C. "There ofensuring access toquality education havebeenlotsoffailed attempts Inthepast~ fromGov. Gen.Mlcha@lle Jean.Since theDec30 "Thelinktobehaviours andattitudes forwomen asa means 3Dtechnology reached Itsheight ofpopularity suspension, over200,000 people haveexpressed hasexpanded," shesays,citing theexample of InOntario. withaudiences during the'SOs, butItwasafar 'Thefocus should notbeonlabour relations, theirdissatisfaction withthegovernment by post-partum depression. joining the"Canadians Against Proroguing Parlia- "There areallkinds ofnewdiagnoses pertaining butonthequality ofeducation college students fromperfect technology backthen.MovlegonowandInthefuture.

ThatIsourfocus ersworepaperglasses witheachlenstinteda whereas formenIt'smuchmorenar- receive ment" Facebook group.

OnJan23,about3,500 of towomen, thosepeople participated Ina rallyonParliament row.Depression Isseenasa woman's disease and today." different colour.

HIii, oneofover60thatoccurred across the Islinked toa lotofeveryday behaviours.• Danlelle WebbCUP Ontario Bureau Chief EdSum-TheNexus country.

Alexandria Eldridge - CUP Alberta Bureau Chief Taryn Orwen•Parrlsh - TheCord Laura Clementson - TheFulcrum TheUniversity ofAlberta hastakenthefirststeps

towards outsourcing theiremail toGoogle - a move thatcould savetheschool overa million dollars peryear.

TheUniversity ofAlberta Isn'tthefirsttoconsider themove - otherCanadian universities, lnclud• IngLakehead University InThunder Bay, Ont.and Dalhousie University InHallfax, haverunInto Issues withthepotential transition because of privacy concerns overtheU.S. Patriot Act. ThePatriot Actallows American authorities access todatabeingstored byorganizations Inthe country, Including Google.

Using Gmail, Google Apps' email service, foruniversity email accounts could meanunwelcome access tostudent databy American authorities.

AttheUniversity ofAlberta, though, Schaeffer saysthatuniversity lawyers areworking through a contract thatwillensure that"rlsks aremanageable."

"We've worked ona privacy Impact assessment thatraised noredflags.

We've doneallourdue diligence thereandwefeelverycomfortable.·

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

5

THE CASCADE

ElectronicCigarettesNeed More TestingSay HealthAuthorities (ASH), a public health charity that JOEL SMART STAFFWRITER aims to eliminate the harm caused by tobacco, said that because of Makers of electronic cigarettes, the lack of smoke, it is likely eor "e-cigarettes," small hand-held clga rettes are safer than smoking vapourizers, promise they are a tobacco. "Most of the diseases ascheaper and healthier alternative sociated with smoking arc caused by inhaling smoke, which contain:; to smoking. Health authorities thousands of toxic chemicals. By around the globe are questioning whether they really are healthler, contrast, nicotine ls relatively safe. as there has not been sufficient re- Therefore, e-cigarettes, which desearch on the subject to make such liver nicotine without the harmful a claim. toxins found in tobacco smoke, are In an advisory announcement likely to be a safer alternative to against the use of e-cigarettes in smoking."

March 2009, Health Canada exASH also points out that e-cigap)al ned that they transmit various rettes virtually eliminate second chemicals to users. "They consist hand smoke. "There is no sideof a battery-powered delivery sys• stream smoke but some nicotine tem that vapourizes and delivers a vapour is released into the air as liquid chemical mixture that may the smoker exhales." be composed of various amounts Due to this, e-cigarettes have of nicotine, propylene glycol, and gained enormous popularity in the other chemicals."

UK for their ability to get around According to BBC News, Doug· traditional smoking bans. According to the BBC, "Companies selllas Bettcher, of the World Health Organization, said that there is not ing the electronic cigarettes have enough information at this time responded [to the new smoking to understand what effect it may prohibitions] by marketing them have on those who use it. "We are as a way of getting around the facing a new product. We do not ban." However, according to The National,the anti-smoking laws in know what is in these cartridges besides nicotine. What are the ef• Abu Dhabi will likely include efocts of ht:!ating and vapourizing cigarettes. the nicotine and inhaling it?"

According to BBC News, reAction on Smoking and Health searchers from the British Medical

Journalbelieve it is unsafe to use e•cigarettes before more research is done on their effects. "There is a worrying lack of safety data on electronic cigarettes, despite their growing popularity with the public."

These researchers noted that some preliminary research has shown e-cigarettes could also cause cancer. "The scarce evidence indicates the existence of various toxic and carcinogenic compounds in e-cigarettes, alb~lt in possibly much smaller concentrations than in traditional cigarettes."

According to ASH, one other problem with e-cigarettes at the moment is that they aren't being regulated, which can lead to other safety issues. "Because the products are unregulated there arc some concerns about their safety since few manufacturers disclose the ingredients of their products."

A warning on the the Electronic Cigarette Company (TECC) website said that a single cartridge has a dangerous amount of nicotine should a child find it. "All nicotine cartridges and fluid must be kept in a safe place and away from children, as the amount of nicotine in a cartridge, if ingested by a small child, could cause serious harm."

However, not all electronic

cigarettes use nicotine. Accord· ing to the website of Instead Electronlc Cigarettes Canada, the cartridges used in their e-cigarettes arc drug-free. "It docs not contain any drugs including nicotine. The ingredients include propylene glycol, water [and) natural and

artificial flavoring." According to Health Canada, even this set of ingredients may cause health issues.

"Nicotine is a highly addictive and toxic substance, and the inhalation of propylene glycol is a known irritant."

Journalists Murdered in Eastern Europe PAUL BRAMMER NEWS& OPINIONEDITOR The murder of two journalists in Eastern Europe in the past month has raised the question of the amount of protection that should be afforded to reporters.

Jo two separate incidents, Russian reporter Konstantin Popov, 47, and prominent Bulgarian crime journalist and radio host Boris Tsankov, 30, were both killlld in January.

Popov was killed while in police cu1>tody ''n the Siberian city of Tomsk, about 3,100 km casl of Moscow", according to the Globe and Mail. The Moscow News reported that Popov "was allegedly beaten and sexually abused in a Tomsk drunk tank, where he was taken on January 4 after neighbors complained he was making too muchnobe."

A friend and colleague of Popov claimed that he was not mur• dered for his work as a journalist, but simply that he was a victim of police brutality. "This could happen to absolutely anyone," Mr. Karpachyov said. "It demonstrates that the police terror is aimed against everybody."

The Committee to Protect Journalists estimate1, that "Since 2000, at least 17 Russian journalists have been killed in retaliation for their work, and the killers have been convicted in only one case," ac• cording to the Globeand Mail. In the case of Popov, "The alleged assailant, Alexei Mitayev, 26, has been charged with aggravated assault and abuse of authority" by the Federal Jnvestigative Commit· tee, the Globeand Mail reported.

Bulgarian crime journalist Boris "Bobbie" Tsankov was killed "on a crowded street in the city centre'' in the capital city of Sofia on Jan 6, according to the BBC. A prominent figure in Bulgar-

ian culture, Tsankov's 2008 book, The Secretsof Mobsters,had caused him to receive death threats, the BBC reported. His death comes two years after the murder of "Georgi Stoev, who had authored a series of books on the:!origins and rise of Bulgaria's criminal un• derworld since the fall of communism in 1989... His killers remain at large," according to the Committee to Protect Journalists.

Three men have been arrested in connection with the death of Tsankov. The BBC reported that "Krasimir Marinov, known as the 'Big Margin', arrested hours after the killing, has now been charged with incitement to murder ... police are still searching for his younger brother Nikolai Marinov the 'Small Margin'.''

Eric Spalding, media and communications professor at UFV, said that journalists being in danger is not a modern phenomenon,."! want to resist the temptation of saying that matters are worse today. I think that journalists have always bel:!nat risk in times of war and crisis, going back, for instance to author Ambrose Bierce's mysterious disappearance while covering a revolution in Mexico in the 1910s.

"On the plus side, most journalists don't die on the job, so a jour• nalist's death remains a big story - one that understandably receives a lot of coverage, since such an oc• currence resonates so much with media profei;slonali;. They can readily think to themselves, 'That could have been me.', .. As individ-

uals, we're all basically lucky to be alive and healthy until we're not."

Spalding commented on the trend of "embedded journalists"; that is, journalists in war zones who are escorted by soldiers. "A lot of people in the media criticized this idea that journalists could only 'go out in the field [in Iraq] accompanied by American soldiers.

They thought it was an encroachment on journalistic freedom. So pre• sumably jour· nalists should have a choice in the matter."

But I'm not saying they should just wander anywhere they want to. On the contrary, they have to be careful. They have to avoid some areas at certain times of the day and they may have to avoid other areas completely. They shouldn't go to interviews alone if they have any concerns about their safety.

They should hire bodyguard:; or accept to travel with soldiers when the circumstances require it."

But there's a limit to what they can do to protect themselves. After all, there are two ways in which a journalist can die. One way is simply through being in the wrong place at the wrong time, in which case no amount of protection will h~lp. The other ls through being targeted, in which case the mur• derer is likely to get his victim

when he's at his most vulnerable."

Spalaing said that UFV courses in media and communications strive to prepare students for the potential dangers they face in their careers, "I do talk about the risks that journalists face in MACS/JRNL 235, Introduction to Journalism in Canada. We dilicui;s the famous saying 'The first casualty of war is the truth' and, as a consequence, the heightened responsibility that journalists have in times of war to go out and get the story firsthand Hit's al all possible."

However, Spalding conceded that journalists can only be prepared so much. "The issue of an instructor'll rei;ponsibillty towards his or her students is a very interesting one. Certainly, it makes sense for an instructor to advise students as much as possible of the challenges that they will encounter in their lives. In my own classes, I do sometimes get into lecturing along the lines of 'Don't make the mistak~s that 1 made.'

"But, you know, in my own life, 1 genuinely tried to follow a lot of the advice given to me by my parents, teachers and others. lt'i; just that I found whole new areas to make mistakes in. Sometimes, I would even think to myself, 'Why didn't anyone warn me about this particular problem?' In this way, an instructor cannot anticipate every situation a student will find himself or herself in. At some point, students have to make their own decisions and accept the consequences for them."

The Committee to Protect Journalists estimates that three journalists have been killed already in 2010, and 801 journalists have been killed since 1992. Of those killed, 141 died in Iraq, which is estimated as being the most dangerous country in the world for a journali:;t to work in.

6

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

UFVresearch

centres gain access to

RCMPdata

the Capital Regional District)"; "a BC jusPAUL BRAMMER

NEWS& OPINIONEDITOR tice system modelling project (being led by the provincial Criminal Justice Reform The University of the Fraser Valley and Secretariat)," which aims to improve the the RCMP have begun a new partnership effectiveness of the modern justice system; aimed at sharing information with an studies of police response effectiveness in emphasis on understanding crirne in an responding to calls; and the scale of drug attempt to make police services more effi- production in B.C. along with the police cient across British Columbia. attempts at "effective counter strategies at According to the U IN press release, the local level."

Dr. Mark Evered, President and ViceUFV "will officially gain access to RCMP data as part of a University-Led Research Chancellor at UFV, said, "This project exStudies (U LRS) partnership that will look emplifies our commitment to integrate at how police service is delivered across teaching and research at UFV,and to serve our region through partnerships." the province."

With the access to RCMP data, research "Partnerships like this one with the centres at UPV will be able to "build new RCMP help our students learn and unanalysis tools for the study of crime in ur- der!;tand how new knowledge is sought, ban environments, which will in turn en- evaluated, asoimilated, and applied to the able the development of statistics, trend real world around them. They participate analysis, and ad hoc reporting for the actively with their professors and see the direct results of their work. TI1is agreeRCMP." The research will be conducted under ment will give us a very powerful teaching the tutelage of "professors or project man- and learning tool." agers," and the information that the reDeputy Commissioner of the RCMP Gary Bass relished the impact that the searchers produce will be "for the purpose of helping the RCMP with crime preven- RCMP hopes the research will have on policing. "For the RCMP in British Columbia, tion initiatives Jn local communities."

According to the UFV press release, this is the latest step in the evolution of "The partnership refines how policing is how we work with our clients and commuconducted in British Columbia, and fol- nities. By partnering with academic instilows the highly successful implementation tutions such as the University of the Fraser of crime-reduction strategics in the last Valley, we are able to share information few years, which have resulted in dramatic and develop a more complete understanding of policing trends and issues. drops in crime rates in the communities that have implemented them."

"Policing continues to be a dynamic and Some of the successful strategies in- evolving profession. By tapping into the clude; the "Prolific Offender Management knowledge and expertise available we will programs being piloted in six different be able to get new and innovative ways to BC communities (Surrey, Kamloops, Na- reduce and prevent crime across the provnaimo, Williams Lake, Prince George, and ince."

&lfflIBEmlJUti AGENDA 1.Welcomeand Call to Order 2 .Adoptionof Agenda 3.Approvalof Minutes 4. DecisionItems Motion to reconsiderpart (a) (a)Special Resolutionto adopt revisedbylaws of the Cascade JournalismSociety (b) Resignationof Directors ( c ) Electionof Society Directors I. Four at-large student representatives II. One UFVFaculty/staffrepresentative Ill. One Cascade JournalismSociety Alumni representative IV One community representative 5.QuestlonPeriod 6.Adjournment SUMMARYOF CHANGESTO THE BYLAWS A. Enshriningthe composition,duties and powers of the CascadeJournalismSociety Board of Directors.The creationof an independent board structureto make decisions regardingthe legal,financialand operational affairsof the Cascade JournalismSociety.

The new board will be voted in by UFV students at an annual generalmeetingand consist of the following positions: I. Four At-Large Student Representatives, who are membersof the CJS in good standing (i.e. have paid student fees)and are not paid-staff at the Cascadeor members of the Student Union Executive.Three out of the four reps must not hold a board position on the UFVStudent Union Society.

II.

One Universityof the FraserValley Faculty/StaffRepresentative

Ill.

One CommunityRepresentative who residesIn the Abbotsford, Mission, Chilliwack,or Hope area.

IV. One CascadeJournalismSociety Alumni Representative,who Is a former Cascadeeditorial staff member or a former director of the Cascade JournalismSociety.

B. Enshriningthe composition and duties of the executiveof the CJS. The executive positionsof President,Treasurer& Secretary will be filled by the CJS board of directors at their first board meeting following an AGM. C. Enshriningthe composition and duties of the EditorialBoard of the Cascade Journalism Society.The EditorialBoard, consist• ing of the current editors of the Cascade shall make decisions regardingthe editorial content of the paper or polices that affect editorialcontent.

D. Enshriningthe powers, duties and hiring of the Editor-in-Chief.With the creation of an independentand accountable board to overseethe financial,legal and operational affairs of the Cascade,the Editor-in-Chief shall no longer be hired by society members at a generalmeeting. Hiringof the Editor-inChief shall be done on a yearly basis by a committee comprised of Cascade directors and staff, a UFVfaculty representativeand members of the UFVstudent community.

The Editor-in-Chiefshall havefinal authority on the editorialaffairsof the Cascade paper and will be the face of the Cascade staff to the community.

UFVstudents are encouragedto attend.

Those InterestedIn runningfor board positions can contact the Cascade at cascade. society@gmail.com.

·r111s

FRIDAY, FEB 2PM C1421

IS TIIE SECOND, AND WILL FINAL, ATTEMPri~

5 BE 'I'HF.

7

THE CASCADE

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

"Adultery enabler" seeks Stock Exchange listing JORDAN PITCHERby the Globea11dMail.

STAFF WRITER Avid Life Media Inc., owner and operator of such websites as CougarLi fe.com (a website where older women can seek out younger men and vice versa), EstablishedMen. com (similar to CougarLife.com, but for older men and younger women), and AshleyMadison.com (a site used primarily to facilitate extramarital affairs) is endeavouring to raise $60 million in an initial public offering of shares in an attempt to become listed on the Toronto Stock Exchange.

According to the Globeand Mail, Avid Life is weeks away from finalizing a deal that, if completed, could see them trading on the Toronto Stock Exchange by the end of the month. This news comes only a month after the Toronto Transit Commission reportedly denied a $200,000 Avid Life advertising campaign proposal that would have involved emblazoning a number of Toronto's streetcars not only with AshleyMadison.com's web address, but with the AshleyMadison.com slogan: "Life is short, have an affair," as reported

Avid Life's pending admittance to the TSX is being met with scepticism and uneasiness by potential investors, due in large part to the ethical ramifications of such a move, according to the Globeand

Mail.

Vladimir Dvoracek, head of the department of economics at UFV, questioned the stock exchange's responsibility in terms of the ethical implications of such a deal. "l don't think an exchange has any obligation to evaluate the ethics of the business a company is involved in. The exchange, of course, does have an obligation to make sure that the business is legal, and that the firm is conducting its affairs according to the law, accepted business practices, and the customs of the land.

"The exchange is in the industry of providing the owners of businesses a marketplace to trade their claims; they are not a, nor should they be expected to be, a body that comments on the social value of a line of business."

Despite this, an unnamed financier who passed on Avid Life's proposition is cited in the Globe

and Mail as saying that "a lot of customers won't want to buy it."

However, Avid Life is reportedly attempting to de-emphasize AshelyMadison.com's monetary impact on Avid Life as a whole, stating that the website only makes up 15 per cent of their earnings, according to the GlobeandMail.

Avid Life is not the only controversial company seeking a listing; U.S.-based company Friend Finder, owner and operator of websites like Bondage.com, are also seeking a listing on the stock exchange.

It is not yet known if Friend Finder and its subsidiaries will succeed in its claim.

Dvoracek cited earlier precedents to illustrate what may happen if the ethics of companies like Avid Life and FriendFinder continue to be scrutinized. "It was the U.S. courts that battered the tobacco industry for their willful disregard of their clients' health and it was grass-roots activism that made drunk driving socially unacceptable. lf society feels the same way about adultery, these same forces will grind down firms involved in that industry."

OlympicProteston Campus

we can stay on the property," explained SFU student Trish Garner.

Garner continued: "This is what student life should be all about: raising awareness about these kind of Issues. Students are the ones working at minimum wage a lot of the time."

Three of the protesters were UFV students, the rest were students from other institutions or community members. "There are

students among us," one protester explained.

"We're actually athletes, poverty athletes, in the torch relay. We go all around ... [but) l'm a life long learner." One of the protesters explained that he comes from the university of life.

On Feb 7, the Poverty Olympics will be held at the Japanese Hall in the Downtown Eastside.

There will be events such as "Team VANOC" versus "Poverty" ice hockey and Olympic Promisl:!Slalom skiing.

"We're trying to push the government to spend as much time and energy and public funds into ending poverty and homelessness as they are into they Olympics," explained Garner.

Garner explained that the protests have attracted a lot of attention. At an event held in Sechelt last Saturday, she stated that over 100 people came out for the parade.

"We've met some resistance, but more support," Garner stated.

Carner stated that U.flV is the

only stop on the torch's relay where the group has been asked to move along. "It's interesting that it's on a campus," she said.

On their website, organizers of the Poverty Olympics have posted a list of demands for various levels of government. Amongst these demands is a 50 per cent increase in welfare rates, a $2 increase of the minimum wage to $10 an hour, discontinuation of Vancouver's "Civil City" initiative and creation of a national housing and homelessness strategy. The group explains that by housing the homeless, Lhe government could save $33 million annually.

The protesters pointed oul that if the government had spent the billions of do11ars that went to the Olympics on social housing and welfare, the province would not have one of the highest poverty rates in Canada. One protester carried a sign that stated 13.7per cent of the Abbotsford population lives below the poverty line.

Because of the poverty rates in B.C., Garner explained that the Poverty Olympics has given the B.C. government a medal. "B.C. wins gold for worst poverty rate, worst child poverty rate [and] lowest minimum wage."

polling period provided the candidate does not violate any of the SUS's elections' policies. This deposit will allow the elections committee to impose a fine on candidates that break minor election guidelines that do not materially affect the outcome of the election.

In previous years, the Electoral Committee had only had the option of disqualifying the candidate, or taking no material action in the event that an election policy is intentionally ignored.

"It was recommended by the chief electoral officer and the changes were brought in at a general meeting of the Society," Brown

explained of the deposit.

Students that arc interested in running for the SUS Board can stop by any SUS office to pick up their nomination package. Alternatively, students may print out an election package from the SUS website at www.ufvsus.ca. Students need to collect 20 signatures from members of the Society to be considered nominated.

There are 20 positions on the Board: nine Representatives at Large, five community reps (Students with Disability Rep, Aboriginal Rep, International Student Rep, Residence Rep, Trades Rep) and six executive positions (Presi-

dent, Vice-President Internal, Vice-President Academic, VicePresident East, Vice-President Finance, Vice-President Social and Vice-President Finance). All these positions are up for election.

Candidate orientations take place on Feb 3 & 9. There is a mandatory campaign orientation on Peb 17.The campaign period takes place from Feb 22 to March 12.

As for Brown, he will not be seeking re-election for the next Board. "I've done my time," Brown explained. However, he does offer some advice for potential candidates: "Be interested. Be genuine.

B@funny."

SONJA SZLOVJCSAK EDITOR-IN-CHIEF On Monday Feb 1, the torch for the Poverty Olympics passed through Ul.1V's Abbotsford campus. The relay aims to raise awareness about the poverty experienced by some British Columbians, despite billions of dollars being spent on the winter Olympics.

Protesters arrived on campus and setup outside Tim Hortons.

Th,q brought a Len foot Poverty Olympics torch, as well as one of the Poverty Olympics mascots.

The Poverty Olympics has three mascots: Itchy the Bedbug, Creepy the Cockroafh, and Chewy the Rat. As one protester explained, "The Poverty Olympics mascots arc more real than Quatchi."

Itchy the Bedbug was in attendance at the protest at UFV. "We're just raising awareness about homelessness and poverty," explained Itchy.

UFV security approached the protesters and asked them to step off of university property. However, after discussions between UFV Safety and Security Manger Dan Sarrasin and the protesters, a compromise was reached; the protesters were allowed to stay on

campus provided they stop using their megaphone, and were not disruptive.

"They [campus security] wanted to move us along, they thought we were being disruptive, and they didn't think this is appropriate for the campus grounds. We managed to reach a compromise; as long as we don't use the megaphone, and we don't attract too much attention, we can give out leaflets and

SUS ElectionUpcoming SONJA SZLOVICSAK EDITOR-IN-CHIEF UFV has entered the nomination period for the Student Union Society's annual general election.

The nomination period runs from Jan 29 to Feb 11, and polling takes place through myUFV from March 16 to 19.

SUS President Jack Brown encouraged all eligible UFV students to get Involved in this year's election. "Getting involved in student government allows students at UFV to improve their educational experience while enriching the wider university. Student leaders

STUDENT UNION SOCIETY

are in a unique position to influence real policy and political direction, not only at the institutional level, but also at the provincial and federal levels."

All university credit students pay the SUS fees, and therefore, arc members of the SUS and eligible to run in the election.

This year, candidates are required to pay a $25 deposit which will be returned at the end of tl\e

THE CASCADE

8

Studying Abroad Pt. 2

Oot and Aboot in France

is a middle-aged British woman who is very sweet and relieved to be renting to girls. 1 honestly can't imagine boys living there anyway: it is decorated with ceramic plates depicting gambolling kittens.

And lace doilies.

It will be an interesting expe-

rience to be abroad during our Olympics. In Vancouver, most people seem to be bitter and angry over them, but overseas there is excitement and anticipation.

The lady sitting next to me on the plane was clutching n Quatchi stuffy. (He is, in my opinion, the only legit mascot we've chosen, due to his extraordinary goalie skills and his pet beaver. I could do without the mutant Sea Bear and hairy Thunderbird).

The first whHe in a new country always highlights differences from home. Small things attract and hold my attention. For example, the doors open in the opposite direction, the stairs are shorter, the toilets are smaller and cube marshmallows are offered as snacks. One of rny roommates has a love of deep sea creatures, so we went to the cinema to sec the movie Ocean.Instead of velour covered

flip-seats, the chairs have real velvet upholstery. They are also too comfortable; we all promptly fell asleep.

School is starting next week and thankfully, I've started to settle into the new routine of a different culture. I'm almost used to the new time zone, I'm eating baguettes and I've stopped craving peanut butter.

My French, hidden under the sediment of years of neglect, is slowly dusting itself off and becoming useful. Unfortunately, T still bear the horrific accent of an Anglophone and most locals automatically switch to English when they hear me speak. My goal is to leave France with enough fluency to rectify this. I also hope 1do well enough on the French placement exam to not be in bottom-feeder classes. Becaui;e that, mes amis, wou Id be embarrassing.

"Father of Medicare," was the Premier of Saskatchewan from 1944 to 1961. He was also an ordained Baptist minister who fought tirelessly for social causes such as universal healthcare in the Provincial and Federal Government.

Another ordained minister, Martin Luther King Jr., was inspired by the Bible to persist in his mission of gaining civil rights for African-Americans. In a letter from Birmingham Jail about church leaders who criticized his actions, he wrote that "[i)njusticQ anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We arc caught In an inescapable JlCtwork of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny.

Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly."

Christians today would be wise to heed these words. While these great moral leaders of the past used divine inspiration to help better the lives of the people around them, Christians currently seem content to marginalize themselves in petty debate. Does the nature of our origin on earth really affect the day-to-day reality of some of our poorest neighbours?

Wouldn't trying to deal with some of the socio-economic conditions that make so many young women

choose abortion be more effective than lecturing them on what they should do with their bodies?

I don't even want to talk about the whole "gay" issue because I personally think being gay is aokay, and anyone who wants to criticize homosexuals probably shouldn't shave their beard or cat shellfish and pork, so saycth Leviticus. Even If you don't think homosexuality is right, is ridiculing and criticizing them the best

way to show gays Cod's love? l bet it feels greatwhen non-Christians do that to you.

In the end I believe that Jesus' smain message to the planet was one of love, so when it comes to grandstanding and aggravating your neighbours pointlessly without doing anything constructive to try and improve the situation remember this; if it ain't love, it ain't Jesus.

floods and drought, it is imperative that all universities, UFV included, take a verbal and active stance educating students in environmental protection and remediation, in education and leading by example.

As I mentioned before, 1 understand this challenges the current status quo in the region, but as a committee you would have to agree that environmental protection and remediation is as important as social, cultural and economic development and therefore should be stated as such in our strategic plan.

Being inclusive of "environmental protection and remediation" in the strategic plan will aid our university in making the environment a priority; especially in a region where it is often overlooked, taken advantage of and abused which is rooted in a lack of education and environmental awareness.

This region is rooted in tradi· tion, which is to be appreciated and honoured. However, just as

we must proceed smartly with environmental action, we must also critique smartly our decisions of the past and consider their effects on the region. And yielding a generation of smart decision-makers and leaders requires an education system that fosters and acknowledges the environment's role in development, along with social, cultural and economic development.

As a result, and as a student and a member of the future, I would like to see the strategic planning committee be bold and be inclusive of environmental protection and remediation, because let's face it, without a healthy environment, both economic, social and cultural development will prove difficult.

I would appreciate dialogue on this request about the strategic plan because I know students care.

This is our university; let's make a bold statement on the direction of its future, and let the steering committee know.

MARINA PARAPINI CONTRIBUTOR I love airports. If I miraculously survive an apocalypse, I will find an empty airport to jungle-gym around in. That being said, I did not welcome the delay of my flight out of Vancouver due to a glitch in the wing flops. It really inspires confidence when the engineer can't figure out what's wrong for the better part of two hours. My brother lold me later that the engines of British Airways are made

by Rolls Royce, and that had there been n fatal accident, he would have written for my epitaph: "Perished in the flames of her Rolls Royce while speeding at 103 km/h.

She will be sorely missed." How comforting.

I arrived in Nice too late in the evening to enjoy the spectacular view of landing in a sea-side

airport. The next few days were spent exploring and finding accommodation. I am living with three American exchange students in a flat strategically placed near the beach, our school and "Vieux Nice,'' the beautifu I historic part of town. The owner of the apartment

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

Christiansin the Mist the centuries ChrisJED MINORThroughout tians were at the forefront of some

PRODUCTION of the most progressive moveGiven Abbotsford':; status as ments in North America. the de facto Bible belt of B.C., it is Quakers, a Protestant sect, were surprising to me that the Cascade at the forefront of the abolitionist doesn't get more input from the movement, which sought to end many Christians that attend UFV. slavery in the American South.

Or more accurately, input on is- The abolitionist movement at that sues other than evolution versus time would have been viewed as creationism, or abortion. Seeing embarrassingly left-wing; after all the letters to the editor and sub- slaves were the economic foundamissions from people of faith, tion of the southern states, and, as it would be easy to assume that FoxNewstells us today, the econothese are the only two issues that my should always come first. The Quakers, however, believed that they care about.

Apparently, Jesus came to earth slavery contradicted the tenets of merely to give us what-for about Christianity and fought against our pro-evolution and pro choice- the prevailing wisdom of the day outlooks. Evidently there isn't in favour of following their beanything in the Bible about taking liefs. care of the poor, or immigrants, or While many people in the north the down-trodden and persecuted were against slavery in principle, (gays?), much less judging not, lest it was the Quakers who risked ye be judged. This is reflective of a their own lives to ferry slaves larger trend that reduces the dis- from the southern states along the cussion of Christian thought in Underground Railroad (a series of safe-houses) to freedom in the the media to these issues alone.

Overall it gives the impression north. The abolition movement is that believers are merely shock one example of Christians using troops for right-wing politicians. the wisdom found in the Bible to The term "Religious Right" itself actually try and improve the lives belies the popular belief that all of their fellow humans, but there Christians are automatically con- are many more. servative, but it watm't always so.

Tommy Douglas, known as the

Strategic Plan LacksEnvironmentalLeadership MELISSA KENDZIERSKI CONTRIBUTOR I would like to provoke discussion on the strategic plan draft, which is why J am writing to the Cascade.I feel that it is very relevant and aligns itself well with the current trends in the Fraser Valley, and furthcnnore, where we are at as an institution. However, I do have criticism in that, with the goal, "To be a leader of social, cultural and economic development in the Fraser Valley," the UFV Strategic Plan fails to mention leadership in environmental protection and remediation. I feel it is a bit short-sighted in regards to the direction and responsibility universities world-wide should take and J would like to see this as a bold goal for UFV. I understand that dialogue and ideologies holding fast to the word "environment" can be a bit scary and can threaten the very economic development that makes this valley attractive. And so from

a political perspective, being in- live in a finite world, with finite clusive of "environmental protec- resources and economic develoption" might be very controversial, ment cannot continue trumping but I would like the strategic plan, and taking advantage of the very as a statement to the community, land, air and water which keeps to rnove beyond the comfort and us alive. safety of the political game.

In a world where resources are As a university, with education dwindling and climate change is as the highest calling, there is a re- ploying out in the forms of mass spo11sibility to rpcog~ize t~a~ r1e , ext¢c~iOI), rtsing se~ l,avels, f\res,

I

•

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

Readingis Good for the Soul

Kids These Days RAY DEKROON

CONTRIBUTOR Do you ever get the feeling that today's youth have lost their way?

Have you noticed the alarming rise in crime, especially violent crime?

There can be no doubt about it, folks, things arc getting worse; and they have been for quite some time.

Our communities are under siege. All those hard drugs the kids are into now must have something to do with it, and don't forget about the rampant gang involvement. It all comes down to a lack of discipline and a weak justice system, you bet.

The most alarming thing it; that these kids are getting into this stuff at an earlier and earlier age.

I don't have any accurate statistics at my fingertips but I would hazard a guess that more kids nowadays are involved in this kind of stuff than ever before, undoubtedly well over half of them. Just walk through the mall or stop by a nightclub on a Friday night (if you dare) and take a look around at all the strange clothes and the glittering bling-bling. Good gracious, everywhere I look I see trouble brewing, you know what I mean?

Well I sure as hell hope not. I've listened to this same old paranoid nonsense for as long as l can remember (I'm knocking on the door of 40 so it's been awhile). Do we really buy into the notion that our youth are headed downhill generation after generation? I swear, if this ever-worsening assumption held true, we would all have been murdered, robbed and raped by now. Like seriously, six-year-olds must be dealing heroin down at the local daycare.

Back when J was just a little whippersnapper, my parents

would sit around the farmhouse dinner table and yak with some old codger from down the lane.

"Kids nowadays, they don't know what hard work is," this old neighbour would sagely say while tamping his pipe with a crusty thumb. ''It's no wonder they're all getting mixed up in drugs and crime. Yep, the whole damn country is going to hell in a handbasket." My parents would nod knowingly.

Thirty-odd years later and here we are. Somehow, my friends and I managed to escape lives of violence,drug addiction, debauchery and crime. These same friends, though, are now beginning to sound just like that old farmer from my childhood! Arhl What has happened to my generation?

Do we all spend too much time watching Nancy Grace? Just one hour of her is sure to put the fear of God into the most calm and n.:asonable member of society. Yes, a drunk, bloodthirsty, drug-pushing, knife-wielding sexually deviant young punk is sure to be lurk·

9

ing in almost every dark corner, Just waiting to get you.

Now T am not saying there are no problems in our society; there most certainly are, and some of them are serious and involve our youth. What I do categorically rejtict is the general notion that things have been getting progressively worse when it comes to the next generation. What kind of message does this send to our adolescents? And anyway, I would argue that the opposite holds true.

When I was in my teens, street racing and drinking and driving were huge, prevalent problems in my peer group - today, due to education and awareness, much less so. Reduction in smoking is anoth• er success story. Of course, there will always be some new problem when it comes to our youth, and many problem!! come in waves, but generally speaking, OUT kids are a pretty good bunch. Now, if we could just keep the older generations from screwing them all up.

A lot of people will, more often RHIS_.MUBLEY CONTRIBUTORthan not, say about a new book: "I'll just wait for the movit! to come Today we live in a timtl where out." What rubbish! Film adaptawe are constantly searching for tions of books rarely stand up to new and better forms of entertain- their originators for several reament. We have satellite television sons. They skip over plot points, and digital cable that offer us hun- sometimes change characters, and dreds of channels with DYRs and will leave out part!; that, although TiVos so we can record a progr.im they may not be integral to the while watching another one so we main story, are supremely enterdon't miss out on the hottest new taining. show.

Look at the Twilightmovies for We have iPods and mp3 players instance. Granted, not the best that can hold thousands of songs books around, but it ii; one of the (mine has over 5000 with a lot of most popular book series in tht! room to spare). We have the In- past decade. The books themternet, where we can download, selves were fun to read, but the stream, and share media from all movie adaptations have been a across the world. We are connect- great disappointment. Even the ed to anything and everything Lordof the Ringstrilogy, albeit one we want. We have video games of the best fantasy series in film of aplenty and movies numbering all time, still managed to garner higher than the average human disappointment in its fan base. being can count in 24 hours. But Of course, we now have digital the one form of entertainment that readers such as the Kindle, and is truly underrated in this day and the brand-new iPad is reported age, yet could be the most impor- to have a reader feature. Perhaps tant, is the printed word. the days of printed word are numBooks and magazines are print- bered with technology growing at ed in the thousands, yet the num- the pace it is. Musicians are beber of people who read for the pure ginning to switch to digital format enjoyment of it has dwindled over for their album releases to combat the years with technological ad- Internet downloading, and now vancement. I love to read. I have with the aforementioned gadgets, been an avid reader my whole authors may begin to jump on that life and will most likely continue particular bandwagon before too to be. lt is astonishing to me, the long. I sincerely hope that I am number of people I know who do wrong in this. not lik.e to read, other than what Maybe it's just me, but there's they find on Internet blogs. Noth- just something about relaxing on ing could be more important than the couch with a good book that is reading; it stimulates the mind to much more appealing than watcheducate and increase knowledge ing the latest episode of American while fueling the imagination and Idol. providing a form of escapism that is often ha rd to find.

The SingleSocksClub do anything if they think it might DANIELA SMITH-FERNANDEZ

THFMANITOBAN lead to them getting back on their feet. The problem is that it's usu' Whatever happens to the socks ally true. Most do spend their time that get left behind? One day they commiserating with others about are part of a pair, and then the being lonely. Oh, the media may next, one goes missing. Lost in the present image1:,of singular socks dryer or mismatched by mistake, striking it big, but realistically, the suddenly this sock has to find a matching pair is still considered place in the world alone. the basic wardrobe unit.

Nothing b sadder than newly Meet Spencer, formerly of "Spensingle socks. You 'can sometimes cer and Jenny." He Isn't sure what see them sitting alone in the win- happened to Jenny; the last thing dow staring bleakly out into a cold he remembers is them entering the dry shivery mess of a downtown dryer together. It seemed like the Greyhound station. They sit in right thing to do; they'd been gomovie theatres and glare envious- ing out for awhile. The next thing ly at all the pairs in the back row he knows, Jenny is gone without playing footsies while pretending saying a word. He isn't sure if she to pay attention to their popcorn. got stuck with another sock by Or sometimes they get re- mistake, or if she just took the first matched into an inappropriate pair chance she could to get out. He's - these socks never go out of the hurt, although he'd never admit house because they arc ashamed it. After all they'd been through of being seen. Others give up the together - the long walks, those second that their mate disappears dark times in the laundry basket - these socks will rationalize or even just the weeks they'd stay their behaviour, saying that there in the drawer cuddling without is no hope of getting back together being in touch with anybody exonce they've lost sight of each oth- cept each other. er. Sadly, they are usually right.

He'd stood by her when she got What do you do as a sock when mauled by a cat and needed stitchyou realize all the plans you've es. Now, none of that matters. He made don't work anymore now can't stand the idea of telling his that two has become one? That's mom that they aren't together, or where the Slngle Socks Club comes face her questions about what hapin. The club president is working pened. Spencer doesn't even really hard to turn the group's image know himself - this is very comaround, but the stereotype re- mon among socks that have lost mains that all single socks are sad, their partners. lonely and so desperate they will

These days when Spencer gets off work he just comes home, pours himself a drink and watches reruns of The Office. His friends recommended getting a cat, but Spencer just doesn't know if he can commit to anythfng that needy. At

first he was excited about having freedom and went out to bars all the time, but soon it felt like he was constantly walking on broken glass. If you ask him why he stopped going out, he'd just say it's not what he's into 'right now.

Instead, he tends to just put on the blue hoodie Jenny bought him and put his feet up.

Joining the Single Socks Club was not Spencer's idea, it was his friend Joel's - or at least that's what he says. Who can blame him for not wanting the stigma?

In the immortal words of the SSC's founder, "I just don't want to be lonely forever." Spencer was enticed by the club's ads of sock pairs with sparks flying all over the place. He knows that these images are probably Photo1:1hopped,but it still made him long for that initial feeling of static electricity. At this point, he can only dream.

Fact is, Spencer's experience is not unusual in this day and age.

Never before have there been so many single socks out there.

Before the days of mechanical washing machines, dryers and Laundromats, very few socks ever lost their mate. Sure, the scouring board and lye meant that most socks wore out faster, but that also meant that each pair was always accounted for and kept together.

As a society, we need to ask ourselves whether or not the efficiency of our new laundry technology is worth the effect it is having on the lives of individual socks alienated within the global industrialized washing system. On behalf of Spencer and all those like him, it's worth considering.

10

THE CASCADE

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

11

Sundance Film Festival W

ith the dawn of a new year, the advent of the award season is upon us. The Oscars,

TREVORFIK STAFFWRITER

the Screen Actors Guild Awards, the People's Choice Awards - it's enough to make anyone forget all about the work of independent filmmakers. That is where Park City, Utah comes in, location of the annual Sundance Film Festival.

Sundance, which is now in its twenty-sixth year of production (since management was acquired by the Sundance Institute), features the work of aspiring filmmakers from across the globe - spanning an array of experience levels combined with every type of conceivable genre. From first time filmmakers and actors starring in dramas and comedies, to seasoned A•list directors and actresses making documentaries, Sundance is a place where the prior talents of individuals mean nothing. It is a clean slate for many, a chance for the experienced to hone their skills in front of an audience of critics and fellow entertainers, and a place of hope for some looking to be recognized. In so many · words, it can make or break the career of an individual.

With the festival

reaching its conclusion on Jan 31, this year's buzz Beems to be centred around documentaries and documentary filmmaking. Garnering much of the discussion is Michael Nash's Climate Refugees, which provides an in-depth look at the problems caused by human displacement. As Nash summarize:;, "If global warming is our planet's most pressing issue, largescale population displacement is the human consequence."

Other films such as 8: The Mormon Proposition,12th and Delaware (centred around one side of the street being home to an abortion clinic, while the other side houses a pro-life outfit), and Restrepo (Grand Jury Prize Documentary winner), have also gone the documentary route, but it is this years Grand Jury Prize winner for a dramatic film, Winter's Bone, that will have studios courting the filmmakers for distribution rights. The movie centres around a young teenage girl, who is forced to travel into the forest deep in the Ozark Mountains to find her fugi• tive crystal-meth making father, before the authorities claim the family home.

According to the Sundance Film Festival website, "Each year the Sundance Film Festival selects 200 films for exhibition from more than 9,000 submissions." The festival, which is 10 days long, was initially started by actor Robert Redford in 1978 to attract filmmakers to the state of Utah. The festival has undergone much change since its inception, starting off a8 a relatively unknown amateur filmmaking get together. The festival

has transformed into a who's-who of the Hollywood elite.

A new addition to the festival this year comes with the ''Across America" campaign, where eight films were selected to present not only at Sundance, but in select cities across the United States. The motivation behind this project is to assist in films reaching a larger audience, thereby increasing exposure and the likelihood of getting picked up by a production company, The crossover from films performing well on the independent circuit, to being featured, and some would say destroyed, by Hollywood production companies has been a hot-button issue within the festival in recent years. How does a movie enjoy the success that accompanies'reaching a broader audience, while maintaining its independent roots? LittleMiss Sunshine would have been unheard of had it not been picked up by the much larger Fox Searchlight Production company, but was artistic integrity destroyed in the process?

Many have come to resent the showering of gifts that accompany A-list actors as they promote a movie or recent directorial debut, seeing it as a push from the traditional beginnings of the festival into a more star-studded event.

However, the festival, which is the worlds largest in independent filmmaking, continues to produce quality work from relatively unknown sources. As long as the work Is good, the film making reputable, and the :,tar:; egos remain in check, the festival will have life for some time to come.

The Jaipur Literature Festival

The TicketmasterLiveNationMerger

Growing Festival Holds Promise

Face oflivemusic tochange forconcert-goers

The two SONJA SZLOVICSAK

festival directors used EDITOR-IN-CHIEFtheir unique backgrounds as the basis of the festival - an Indian litave you ever heard of Jaipur? erary festival with a global focus. unfortunately many North The focus consists of South Asian Americans l\aven't. Jaipur is one writers that write in one of the of the best planned cities in the many languages from the subconworld, has a population of over 4 tinent, South Asian writers that million, and every year plays host write in English, and writers from to the Jaipur Literature Festival. across the globe that write about Unfortunately, many North South Asia, Americans don't hear too much Usually, there are debates on about the Jaipur Literature Festi- topics such as "What is the South val. This festival takes place once Asian Diaspora?" Obviously, cona year, usually in the last week sidering the wide-variety of writof January. Some of the biggest ers travelling to India to speak names in the literary world travel about literature, this question half way across the globe to speak could have a very broad answer. at the festival.

This year's list of award winThe festival began in 2005. This ning authors consisted of Wole year, more than 200 writers from Soyinka, winner of the 1986Nobel across the world came to speak to Prize for Literature; Anne Apple· guests and delegates at the festi- baum, whose book Gulag:A Hisval - including Vancouver's own tory won the 2004 Pulitz@r Prize Ameen Merchant. Merchant's first for non-fiction; Kai Bird, winner novel, The Silent Raga, was short- of the 2005 Pulitzer Prize with his listed for the Commonwealth biography American Prometheus: Writers' Prize in 2008.

The Triumphand Tragedyoff. Rob• The fe:;tival is the largest liter- ert Oppenheimer;Lawrence Wright, ary festival in Asia. Some semi- winner of the 2006 Pulitzer Prize nars have audiences which num- for General Nonfiction with his ber near a thousand (although, book The LoomingTower:Al-Qaeda that's not surprising since atten- and the Road to 9/11;and two-time dance is free, and the festival has Pulitzer Prize winner Steve Coll. attracted famous, and sometimes Admission to the festival is free. controversial, names like Salman Pre-registered delegates also reRushdie and Ian McEwan). ceive invitations to official dinners The festival is the brain child of and receptioos. This year's festival William Dalrymple and Namita ran from Jan 21-25. For more inGokhale. Dalrymple is Scottish, formation, visit www.jaipurliterabut spent has much of his career turefestival.org. writing about South Asia. Gokhale b Indian, but writes in English.

H

TREVORFIKcome in the form of the Anschut~ STAFF WRITER Entertainment Group (AEG), who

far, pointing to Ticketmaster's "hi:;tory of anti-consumer behavcurrently runs ticket sales on 100 iour," as reason enough to remain n a deal that the LosAngelesTimes venues around the United States. wary of the new deal. is claiming could "transform the Under the deal, Ticketmaster Ticketmaster Chief Executive, music industry," the merger of would be forced to give up its on- Irving Azoff, responded to critiNorth America's dominant ticket line ti~ket sale technology to AEG, cisms that the merger will only selling agency, and the world's and be unable to respond with give Live Nation Entertainment largest concert promoter, has been repercussions if artists or venue increased power to run up ticket finalized. owners decide to have their ticket sales by saying that the "resoluTicketmaster, which has had a sale service nm by AEG. tion is a great win for fans." veritable monopoly on the sale of The deal was the first serious Both Ticketmaster and Live Naconcert and event tickets in recent challenge under the Obama ad- tion have a longstanding history years, will combine with Live Na- ministration to the antitrust laws of poor public approval ratings, tion, whose hold on the concert in the United States designed to culminating in the 2009 lawsuit promotion market was previously promote competition and stabil- brought against Ticketmaster Ticketmaster's biggest competi- ity in the market. The deals settle- amidst allegations that the compation. According to the Los Angeles ment, which was over sought by ny was selling tickets under their Times, the newly formed Live Na- the Justice Department and re- TicketsNow website at a grossly tion Entertainment now has the viewed by 17 state attorney gener- inflated price. The event brought ability to "book concerts, sell tick- als, had been proposed given the the fury of the "Boss," who stated ets and merchandise, and manage initial promise that it would not "The one thing that would make artists all under one roof." harm consumer:; and even pass on the current ticket situation even Prior to the merger, Live Na- benefits to individuals. worse for the fans than it is now tion owned and operated as many Initial responses to the deal by would be Ticketmaster and Live as 135 concert venues world wide, consumers and industry analysts, Nation coming up with a single including London's Wembley Sta- however, have been grim. They system.'' Unfortunately for Bruce dium. predict that individuals won't be Springsteen, it appears his wildThe deal, which is valued at $889 seeing any savings on exorbitant est nightmares have already come million, came with a set of condi· ticket prices and service fees any true. tions that would limit the ability time soon. of Live Nation Entertainment to The criticisms have been levpossess a monopoly on the concert el led at the Justice Department's and event sales market. In order focus on creating competition. to prevent a monopoly from oc- Something which critics agree curring, and create a marketplace will "bring more competition into that is ripe with competition, the the ticketing business," and could United States Justice Department "end up raising prices for fans instipulated that in order £or the 'ltead of lowering tj,em," accordmerger to occur Live Nation Enter- ing to the Wall StreetJournal. tainment has to set up two rivals Sally Greenberg, executive dito facilitate competition. rector of the National Consumers One of the proposed rivals will League has backed up critics thus

I

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

THECASCADE

12

ARTS & LI.FE

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Musicians for Haiti

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top price that the tickets

MANAGINGEDITOR fetched that evening was $4000

he catastrophic earthquake in Haiti that occurred on Jan 12 of this year rent asunder a country that already had few of the amenities found in the rest of the western world. The earthquake took the already fragile Haiti, and brought it a point where no person in good conscience could ignore what had happened. TI1eoutpouring of support that Haiti received from countries around the world is something that we can look at, despite our differences, and see that we all respect each other as human beings. Much of the focus of the aid though, has been on government response and not on what individuals have done.

Some individu.-ils that rnay be best suited to raise aw.-ireness,and funds, for this are those already in the public eye. Since the earthquake struck Haiti, musicians, both individually and as a collective, have been active facilitators in the co-ordination of aid, active relief workers and promoters of awareness of the dire situation found in Haiti. When Rihanna covered Bob Marley's "Redemption Song" on the Oprah Winfrey Show on Jan 20, it immediately became available on iTunes. Following the broadcast, Rihanna vowed that all the proceeds would go to charitable organizations working in Haiti.

Artists have also grouped together to collaborate on a downloadable album called Download to Donate to Haiti. Artists include some seemingly hitherto unrelated performers, namely Dave Matthews, Slash, Peter Gabriel and Linkin Park, who put this downloadable effort together. The album is free to download from www.musicforrelief.org where payment is not required, but a donation, in the style of Radiohead's fo Rainbows,will go undivlded to the relief efforts in Iiaiti.

And speaking of Radiohead, at sma II inti mate concert in Los Angeles, on Sunday Jan 24, they raised $572,774USO in a two hour

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concert.

USO for a pair.

The Hopefor Haiti telethon is very much the centerpiece effort that music industry has put out. The artists there were too numerous to all list here, but included my personal favourite, Bruce "The Boss" Springsteen, as well as Madonna, Alicia Keys, Coldplay, Stevie Wonder, Shakira, John Legend, Mary J, Blige (who sang the wonderful "Hard Times Come Again No More," which has also been covered by Cash, Dylan, and Springsteen), Taylor Swift, Be· yonce and so many more. The telethon was aired on Friday Jan 22 and ran for two hours. Many of the tracks sung by artists were covers, and new material that could be packaged for purchase on iTunes as either the full album, an individual song or a video recording of the telethon.

Many artists appeared heartbroken and passionate in the plea for Haiti and its recovery. While the broadcast itself was somewhat short in the background and details of the disaster, and the scope of its impact, the heart of the telethon was in exactly the right place, leading to its outstanding success and raising more than $57 million dollars to date, according to Billboard. com.

The one individual artist that cannotbeleftoutinthisisWyclef Jean, who had been working in Haiti long before people knew him, and will be there building in the country with what seems to be his last ounce of strength.

Wyclef Jean is a promoter for Haiti first and a musician second. Years ago, on the TV program 60 Minutes, Wyclef Jean was interviewed primarily about his efforts with the Y~le Haiti (meaning, by Wyclef's own definition, "a cry for freedom") and how that charity sets to rebuild Haiti through education, infrastructure, the reduction of crime and HIV/AIDS reduction.

Recently,though, his charity is mired in some con-

.:r"""'Wliit:, trover-

regarding mismanagement of some funds. The mistake has been admitted to, and there is a desire to continue the work the charity has started.

Wyclcf Jean is likely the one musician that has contributed the absolute most of his time and efforts to the ongoing relief work. Thus far he has used his charity to help in relief efforts, was a notable member

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the Hope for Haiti telethon, has made several trips down to Haiti and is doing relief work while there, and is now facilitating another telethon, "SOS Saving Our Selves-Help for Haiti" which will air this Friday, Feb 5 from Miami.

For more information on Wyclef Jean's efforts, visit his charity website yele.org.

If you can spare some of the small amount that you're able to give this semester,

please consider donating some to the Haitian relief efforts. Any amount that you can give rnay be more than many there already have. Many of the artists and programs listed here give 100 per cent of their proceeds to relief efforts in Haiti, so there are no third party payouts involved; your donation will go directly to the ongoing relief work.

. . - -THE CASCADE

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

13

----------MINI ALBUM REVIEWS----------

Melanie Fiona - The Bridge

Daniel Merriweather - Love & War

With an even mixture of songs about inner turmoil and hip shaking tracks, Fiona's debut album, The Bridge does not disappoint.

The Bridge fuses some Motownesque inspirations with modern day R&B to create a very enjoyable disc. This CD would be ideal to play in the background if you were having company over or if you need some inspiration to clean your room. The first single from this album, called "Give It to Me Right" peaked at number 20 on Canada's Top 100 and made it all the way up to number five on the Greek and Swiss charts. The Bridge is also currently on sale on iTunes.

l♦I

Australian musician Daniel Merriweather has recently released his official debut album titled Love& War and it is fantastic. It even reached number two on the UK charts. He's toured and befriended excellent musicians like Kanye West, Justin Timberlake and Mark Ronson. And while not a lot of North Americans know of him, he's hoping to change that.

This album is sure to help. lt's an easy listening R&B record that is sure to have you swaying along to the beat. Each song has message and each are beautiful in their own way. Start out with the singles "Red" and "Change" and them take in the album as a whole. Once listen and you'll be hooked; you'll realize why he's causing such a commotion across the pound and down under.

FlnanclalConsumer Agency of Canada

Priestess - Prior to the Fi re

Motion City Soundtrack - My Dinosaur Life Mini Review

Grand Archives - Grand Arehives

(Spin.com) After 2006's acclaimed debut, Hello Master, this Montreal metal foursome had to cut through a mass of red tape before Fire, their long-gestating follow-up, could get a U.S. release date. Someone should be fired for the delay, because this baby burns.

Whether it's galloping epics ("The Gem") or thrashy revenge fantasies ("Ladykiller"), the band proves awesomely adept at casting a multitude of dark spells. But singer/guitarist Mikey Heppner is also tough enough to let rays of melody shine through the gloom ("Sideways Attack").

Our favourite little indie band is all grown up with their fourth studio effort My DinosaurLife.Pro• duced by Blink 182's Mark lioppus, the album is laced with the intelligent pop sound the band has become renowned for. What is different is an increasingly polished - some would say edgier - sound that will have old followers of the band hitting repeat, and new listeners scrambling to find Motion City Soundtrack's previous work.

Lead vocalist and guitarist Justin Pierre has a voice that flows beautifully. Every note is hit with such a fevered intensity; the listener is drawn in and left emotionally exhausted by the albums end.

The guitar and drums compliment the vocals wondrously, with a smooth, flexible rhythm that pushes each song to its desirable harmonious threshold, keeping individuals satisfied song after song.

Another indy band out of Seattle, Grand Archives surprisingly does not sound like Postal Service or Death Cab For Cutie. Getting back to more honest roots of lapsteel guitars and gang-vocals, they do a surprising number without sounding like another pop/country band. Steady drum beats and clear reverbed guitar leads allow the vocals to fill in the rest of the back-ground with the occasional piano chord pumped in. This doesn't mean they aren't without a touch of class; They make good use of violins, jingle bells and glockenspiel on the crescendo. The overall soft music and easy, but not cheap, lyrics make it a prime long-haul driving album!

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14

THE CASCADE

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

ConcertReviews

llncoming ~1nows

.!.!.!!.Z.=.z:=:..:.z=.:.:.a1-..:...:.:..:.:.:....;:~~-=,-::.=s=ke~t.,,,,,_,ba~I......_I --=-En~e~r ~~::.=.a:.~~~~~~e-1 SatFEB 6 LARRY PORTELANCE CONTRIBUTOR n the last weekend of January, Mezzamazing, Twin Crystals and Basketball took to the st~ge at the Astoria on East Hastings. All three bands are based •in Vancouver, and all three bands were coming from slightly different scenes that dot the nightlife of Vancouv~r.

Mezzamazing is a non-pretentious and simple-to-enjoy package who have a gypsy feel; Twin Crystals comes with a reputation of underground punk scenes for audiophiles who like their music on seven inch vinyl; and close-brackctting this show was Basketball, who were also non-pretentious and featuring a drum-circle, electro-dance feel.

First up on stage were the feelgreat, gyspy-rock ensemble, Mezzamazing. With over nine members, Mezzamazing is a group that has a great and interactive stage presence. This @nsemble is an organic structure that enjoys the usage of compound time-signatures and interesting minor scales rooted in regions east of Croatia.

Mezzamazing truly plays the kind of band that anyone can enjoy. If you can jump up and down on the beat, hold one arm in the air, and

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have your other arm around your friend, you will be able to enjoy the music Mezzamazing puts out.

H gets even better if you can figure out when to shout "Hey!" along with their music. Mezzamazing were quite the opening act, and were able to pack the floor fast.

Next up was Twin Crystals, composed of three members playing a mixture of electronic synths, guitars and drums. Popular with the kind of hipsters who serve and sip coffee at fine establish-

AFI

ments like J.J. Bean, Twin Crystals oozed with that holier than thou· feel. Relying heavily on repetitive melodies the synth put out, Twin Crystals topped their sound off with reckless and tragic guitar strumming. Twin Crystals has music that can be danced to, but it is not in the same manner as one does at happy-go-lucky, gypsyrock sets. It is more 0£ a thing for people who work at being in the know. Speaking of which, Twin Crystals seemed to want to keep it

that way since they did not have any merchandise for sale.

Last up and starting at 1:20 a.m. were Basketball. Shamefully, by the time BaBketball took to the stage, the Astoria started to clear out. Perhaps it was a fragmented crowd who came for other bands, or maybe it was the late night, but it was too bad. Basketball was an interesting mixture of drum circles and the electronic beats of dari,ce halls. The music is crunchy , and distorted, but it is rhythmically cohesive and danceable. Despite the exodus, the floor was bumping with plenty of people who let loose in a dance fever set by the multiple drummers and the electronic doodads Basketball used. It was also a shame to see that Basketball did not have any merch for sale either.

The Astoria did a ·great job hostJng this event and it will be interesting to see what else makes its way to their stage. Twin Crystals will be playing Glory Days at the Biltmore Cabaret Saturday, Feb 20 and then at the Astoria Friday, March 5 before they depart on a west coast tour. Mezzamazing and Basketball have no dates listed but keep alert because dates tend to pop up. Both are energetic ensembles are not to be missed.

LARIOTS w/ GOLDEN FILTER, JUNIOR BOYS GREAT NORTHERN WAY CAMPUS MICHAEL BERNARD FITZGERALD· PITPUB

SunFEB 7 THE ALBUM LEAF -RICKSHAW

Wed FEB 10 HILLTOP HOODS -VENUE HIGH ONFIRE· BILTMORE

ThuFEB 11 P.O.S. • BILTMORE STANTON WARRIORS -CELEBRITIES HARD RUBBER - GREAT NORTHERN WAY CAMPUS

FriFEB 12 KIDKOALAGREAT NORTHERN WAY CAMPUS VIVIAN GIRLS· BILTMORE SatFEB 13 JAMMING THENETWORKS w/MIKE SHANNON -GREAT NORTHERN WAY CAMPUS THE ANVIL EXPERIENCE -VENUE

SunFEB 14 EMALKAY -TUNNEL MULTI LOUNGE

Mon FEB 1S CITY AND COLOUR· Q.E. THEATER TueFEB 16

JUSTIN TOWNES EARLE -BILTMORE

Good music but ..

JUSTIN ORLEWICZ to old AFI when it was still new STAFF WRITER to the world). I'm not saying the

FI came to Vancouver last week to promote their new album Crash/Love with a concert at the fabulous Commodore Ballroom.

AFI sounded as good as they a !ways do, but they looked different on stage this time. They looked like they have had a modern rock make over. Lead singer Davey Havok looked, well, normal for once.

They played a lot of their new music - J don't think l heard one song from the Geoff Kresge and Mark Stopholese days. Why they didn't play any of their old stuff is justifiable, but nonetheless, it would have been nice to hear one song from the old days for nostalgia's sake (especially for us older guys and girls that were smoking weed in the mid 90's and listening

A

new material they arc putting out is bad, I actually quite enjoy the music they are putting out these days. It's nice to see a band that can evolve musically. l think the real bad taste in my mouth from this AFl concert stems from the brief interview I conducted after the show with the band.

Their publicist didn't want to even give me a few questions, but after I pissed him off enough he finally gave in to my nagging. He made me wait in the back ally behind the Commodore Ballroom with the rest of the die hard schmucks waiting for a quick autograph.

When the publicist finally came to get me, he said that I could only have three questions and they had to be approved by him before I could ask them. When my chance finally came to talk to AFI, this is what two of the four members had

to say to my censored questions:

What's yourfavourite placeinVan City?

Jade Puget: Blood alley, I hung out a Jot in blood alley this time, hope to return; it's only a block long, but I didn't get to experience the whole thing this time.

my favourite team, Toronto Ostrich Balls areama,1ingas well. I couldn't really narrow it down but ['m obviously a huge hockey fan.

What oreyouplansforosummer What's your tour? takeon Vancouver, how Jade Puget: I have none, no doyoulikeit? plans, no touring, fuck itl You guysorefromCalifornia and hockey isstarting togainsome steamdown south, areyouguys hockey fans?Andifso,whatore yourfavourite teams?

Jade Puget: Ya man I love hockey, Vancouver Dagger Mouths are

(. I (cj a

~

IC,

Adam Carson: l love Vancouver it's a great city; it reminds me a lot of San Francisco. I feel comfortable here.

What's oneofyourfavourite spots inVanCity?

Adam Carson: I love the Templeton

I wasn't impressed that they screened my questions to begin with, and then Jade Puget took the interview as a joke. Adam Carson was nice but pressed for time, AFI: good music, great show, but not too bright; It seems like I was not the only one who was too high.

(1\7111'....:::llria\..

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PAUL FALARDEAU

ARTS &LIFE EbiWR A Mark Inside Inside; These Apparent Things

Crystal Castles Through the Hosiery

There is something about this song that sketches a very thin line between romance and violence.

A beautiful song that is as criss-crossed with startlingly Sexy, yet aggressive, the beats vivid imagery as it is with static seem to pump adrenaline into the filled guitar. Things seem to 11Jow atmosphere and the lyrics are dedown, and the overall feeling is a ceptively disturbing. deep pool of palpable emotion.

The Who - My Generation Quick - before Will.Lam's "reworked" (read; ruined) version of this timeless classic airs on the Superbowl, listen to the timeless original. Granted, that classic can never be taken away from those who knew it the Who's way first.

Maybe I'll eat crow but I just keep having these disturbing dreams about Fred Durst with Blu~

Blind Willie Johnson • Dark was the Night A traditional blues that burns slow. Johnson simmers and bubbles with this moody track. Tt either sounds like music from a funeral or an execution. Barely a word is sung; instead, Johnson hums and wails.

DJ Shadow - Organ Donor DJ Shadow reportedly has over 60 000 records in his collection (who gets to inherit that?!).

Evidently, one of them is Giorgio Moroder's Son of My Father, because the organ track from "tears" found its way onto one of the best songs on Endtroducing ...

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

THECASCADE

15

Album Review False Alarm -Andy Brown

East coast sound at home in the west

SONJA SZLOVICSAK haven't heard any of the songs EDITOR·IN·CHIEF from his newest album - the first s there such a thing as a "Cana· dian East Coast Sound"? Usually, when we West Coasters try to picture the music of the Maritimcs, images of bagpipes and Celtic sounding fiddle music pops to mind. If you haven't been to the other side of the country, it's hard to picture what kind of music they listen to in, say, Fredericton, New Brunswick (it doesn't help that the term "Acadian" gets thrown around a lot, and most of us have no clue what that actually means).

So I was surprised when I listened to Andy Brown for the first time; he doesn't sound anything like a fisherman playing bagpipes.

In fact, I'm tempted to compare him to Bcllingham's Death C.-ib for Cutic (which means he sounds much closer to home than those mysterious Acadians), but only because he has that same, slow, west coast feel that Death Cab has. Then again, perhaps that's just what east coast folk rock sounds like.

Andy Brown is a New Brunswick boy. He began as a solo act, but picked up Ed Cullinan on guitar and keyboard, Jason Berube on drums, and Chris Craig on bass for his second album, FalseAlarm.

This may album number two, but it's his first album with his band (his 2006 debut EP Quicksand Confusio11was a solo album).

False Alarm was released last August. Don't be surprised if you

I

single from the album, "Crazy", just began to get airtime in Central and Eastern Canada last month.

1-lowever, considering that "Crazy" just made it up to number two on the East Coast Countdown, it shouldn't be too long before some west coast radio stations like The Peak start to pick it up.

Brown h.is a very raw voice, but it mixes well with the instrumentals. Berube is a steady drummer, which holds the songs together when they start to go off in all directions with the keys and bass (as in the single "Crazy"). Bcrube's drumming is very subllc, but il really pulls the songs together.

Most of the songs on FalseAlarm are very slow, like Lovesick Lullaby. However, Cullinan manages to keep the songs interesting with his guitar work; il acts as a "pick me up" when the music begins to get slow or heavy.

The surprising thing about False Alarm is that there aren't any "filler" songs; every song works, and the album as a whole feels cohesive. The songs flow into each other, rather than being a mix-match of random songs that were put on an album just because. There's nothing worse than shelling out 20 bucks for an album, and finding you only like two songs - and those two songs arc the singles being played on the radio everyday.

Luckily for Andy Brown, False

Alarm isn't one of those "filler" albums.

In the song "Blue Eyes", Brown sounds like he's celebrating his rising popularity when he croons "Things arc much better now/ l think I'll be fine/Everything seems different now~' It's entirely possible that he does feel like he's almost made it: In 2008, Andy

Brown was a CBC Calaxic Rising Star finalist, and has been getting big thumbs up from audiences on the cast coast. However, the album is called FalseAlarm, so there could be some tricky symbolism hidden there (hopefully nol).

If Andy Brown can get enough radio time in some of the bigger Canadian cities (like, Toronto),

he'll probably be in a position to go for a Juno. Which isn't bad for a young guy from Fredericton.

Youconcheck outhisalbum on iTunes, orvisithiswebsite tolisten tohissongs otwww.ondybrown.co.

In Bed With Everyone GREG REESE

THESHEAF ore and more, it's becoming clear that collaboration and community arc the key to success in the Canadian music industry.

Attack in Black have put this no• tion into practice - they've made some interes\ing friendships over the course of their burgeoning career, and the collaborative results are ours to enjoy. Though Attack in Black arc touring without a new album to promote (the demos are still in the works), the band has been keeping busy in many ways establishing themselves as mainstays in the Canadian music scene.

Not the least of their accomplishments has been the establishment of their own record label, You've Changed Records.

"Dan and Ian started (the label) with our friend Steve Lambkc of Baby Il.igl(;!fame," says guitarist Spencer Burton, walking his dog in his hometown of Welland, Ont. shortly before the tour took off.

"They just put out good records: the Shotgun Jimmie record, Still Jimmie, our split with Baby Eagle and the Daniel, Fred and Julie record (which features tour male Julie Doiron). Dan and Ian just plan to keep putting out good stuff that they hear."

Attack in Black's love affair with Shotgun Jimmie - who first gained notoriety playing with Julie Doiron In Shotgun and Jaybird - represents another bond that runs as deep and historic as the watery depths of Lake Ontario.

"We just went up to Hamilton a week ago and played a show with

M

him," says Burton. "Just whenever you're available and able to play with Shotgun, it's great."

The collaboration between these artists has been extremely fruitful and will surely continue in the coming years. Attack in Slack are

the backing band for the Shotgun's 2009 album Still Jimmie.

"It was weird. We just stumbled across Shotgun Jimmie's music and fell in love. We asked him ifhe would tour with us. He said, 'Sure, but I don't have a band. Can you

play as my band?' Then we met Ju• lie through him," Burton says, before getting distracted by his dog licking a nearby pole.

"Isn't it weird when dogs just lick pee?" Burton asks. "It weirds me out. My dog Bucky, he sees it

and gives it a little taste, .ind then he does a jaw shudder.

I le just really likes it. Maybe he knows something we don't.

Sorry, that's gross."

If spontaneity and authenticity arc absolutely fundamental to rock music then Attack in Black has got it cased. But the best aspect of Attack in Black is simply the music itself; the sound is uncanny.

Like all lasting rock bands, they manage to sound original, while, al the same time, reminiscent of the great music of the past.

"We listen to evcryth ing under the sun. We all listen to the same stuff, but different stuff too. l stick Lo music that most people think sucks: I really like Kris Kristofferson and Peter, Paul and Mary; also, Eliz.-ibcth Cotton, she was Pete Scegcr's nanny she's unbelievable. But we listen to a little of everything.

Like last year, we just kept popping on NOFX's Ribbed, just over and over again. "

*For Attack inBlock tourdates, go tohttp://www.myspoce.com/ attoc~inblack*

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FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

BookReview Youth inRevolt byC.D.Payne a book. So, being a partially rehaJORDAN PITCHER

STAFF WRITER bilitated "individual" I feel it h my

I

t is no secret that there are individuals out there who take their pop culture very, very seriously.

A million times more so if it is thought to be the obi,curest piece of pop culture in the history of ever.

These individuals will clutch this obscure band/book/movie tightly to their breast, only loosening their grip to mention said obscure piece of culture at parties in a bid to reach third base with whoever has the best bangs. Inevitably, after being nurtured on the individual's elitist milk (rich in irony), the obscure piece of pop culture will be found by Hollywood and will be exploited for everything it is worth. Such is the case with Youth in Revolt. It is a sad state of affairs when most people I talk to that enjoyed the {ilm have no idea there is

duty to make you painfully aware that there is a pure, radiant novel that precedes the unfortunately diluted film.

You/1-t in Revolt is, at its core, a novel about the unwavering spirit of the underdog when faced with seemingly insurmountable obstacles during their quest. The underdog in question is precocious 14-year-old, Nick Twisp. Nick is like most adolescent males in that he is obsesE;edwith sex, will do whatever it takes to get laid, and has problems disguising the fact that he is, more often than not, sporting what he refers to as "Thunderous Erections" or TE's for short. However, Nick is unlike most adolescent boys in hii, roguish charm, his reverence for Frank Sinatra, his advanced vocabulary and his devotion to journal-keep-

ing. Nick's journal spans six turbulent months and serves both as an inventive narrative structure and as a means to view the transformation he undergoes from the inside out.

For the most part, the novel adheres to a "quest" narralive. Nick's quest, so to speak, is to win the heart of the girl he falls in love with while on vacation, Sheridan "Sheeni" Saunders. This quest sees Nick performing increasingly outrageous and depraved acts (such as faking his best friend's death, blowing up half of Berkeley, dressing up as a woman named "Carlotta," and fooling the authorities into thinking he has moved to India, to name a few) in order to be close to Sheeni. The quest is broken up into three volumes; "Youth in Revolt," "Youth in Bondage," and "Youth in Exile." The three volume structure is a useful device in

that it allows the reader to observe Nick's evolution from love-sick teen with mildly criminal impulses to an insane teen with wildly criminal impulses with surprising clarity.

Though Youthi11Revolt is primarily a twisted black comedy that trades on its increasingly outlandish comedic situations, it is not devoid of a deeper meaning. The largest theme running through the novel is that of love and what lengths we will go to in order to obtain it. Sure, Nick is just 14 but he is a pure manifestation of the reckless abandon love (possibly) inspired in us as adolescents.

BookReview Percy Jackson andtheOlympians byRick Riordan

Not just for kids

BRITTANY WJES~.EB ing under most of North America, and in

SPORTS & HEALTH EDITOR the fifth and final book he, and all the know you're thinking either "Hey, isn't that the children's movie coming out this month?" or "Hey, my preteen (insert family relation here) is reading that!" Yes, if you thought either one of those, you are correct. It was written for a younger audience but, as the old adage goes, don't judge a book by the cover. Percy Jackson and the Olympians,

by Rick Riordan, is a great young adult series.

The series is five books long and revolves around the story of Percy Jackson's realization of the fact that his father is none other than Poseidon, the Creek god of the sea. Each book is a new adventure for Percy and his friends, and while he fights monsters, the reader watches him grow. In the first book he is accused of stealing Zeus'i; lightning bolt, in the second he has to travel through the Sea of Monsters, in the third he has to help rescue Artemis, in the fourth he must travel through a Labyrinth spread-

I

..,

..,

New York Times Best

Sellers

other half-blood's and gods, must battle a powerful army of monsters and titans.

These books are directed more towards children, and they may be an easy read. However, each one is more hilarious than the last. With a motley crew of friends and a variety of Greek God adversaries, plus the candid firsthand account

by Percy, you're sure to laugh at least once a chapter.

As well, since it is primarily about the children of Greek gods, the stories focus on the traditional Greek myths - and they do an excellent job. The books all integrate monsters from the myths, like Medusa and Centaurs, and some lesser-known monsters that are just as fascinating. They also draw parallels to previous Greek heroes and their fights in very com icaI ways.

The research the author put into these books really shows when it comes to his ability to incorporate the myths with our

mode r n

d a

y

world.

They are a quick read and you can finish all five of them in a record amount of time but, they are funny and the adventures a re epic and vastly entertaining. It's a great series for readers young and old alike. At least borrow it from the library.

The first book isn't the best, but just keep reading and soon you'll wish there were more than five books. With the movie coming out in a few short weeks, it's sure to be the topic of at least some people's conversations, and you wouldn't want to be left out right? If worse comes to worst, at least you'll have something to chat about wilh your younger family memb~rs.

Hardcover Fiction

Hardcover Nonfiction

Paperback Trade Fiction

Paperback Moss-Market Fiction

1. THE HELP

by Kathryn Stockett

1. GAME CHANGE

by John Heilemann & Mark Halperin

1. A RELIABLEWIFE

by Robert Goolrick

1. DEAR JOHN

by Nicholas Sparks

2. THE LOVELYBONES

by Alice Sebold

2. THE LOVELY6ONES

by Alice Sebold

3. HAVE A LITTLE FAITH

by Mitch Albom

3. THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO

by Stieg Larsson

3. THE DEVIL'SPUNCHBOWL

by Greg Iles

4. GOING ROGUE

by Sarah Palin

4. DEAR JOHN

by Nicholas Sparks

5. STONESINTO SCHOOLS

by Greg Mortenson

5. TRUE COLORS

by Kristin Hannah

2. THE FIRST RULE

by Robert Crais 3. THE LOST SYMBOL

by Dan Brown 4. THE SWAN THIEVES

by Elizabeth Kostova 5. THE LAST SONG

by Nicholas Sparks

2. COMMITTED

by Elizabeth Gilbert

4. PLUM SPOOKY

by Janet Evanovich 5. STREETGAME

by Christine Feehan

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

THE CASCADE

17

Movie Review JOEL SMARTconvinces him that for it to work, STAFF WRITER he will have to do some terrible things (which goes against his nahere a re not many genres more ture). tired than the teen sex comedy Crazy in love, Twisp develops about a boy desperate to lose his an alter-ego, Fram;ois Dillinger, to virginity. Nevertheless, there is a do his bidding. The idea is a solulot to enjoy about Youth i11Revolt, tion to his conception that, "in real directed by Miguel Arteta and life, it's usually the prick [that gets starring Michael Cera. The film is the girl]." His new "bad ass" perunapologetic in its absurdity, and sonality fits what he thinks will it comes off awkward but enjoy- be irresistible to women. Watchable. ing Cera play such a character is Youth in Revolt, based on the without question the highlight of book by the same title, stars Nick the film. However, the method of Twisp, played by Cera. Twisp is a depicting both he and his alterlonely misfit who is overtly aware ego on screen at once, with his of his own virginity. Sheerd Saun- alter-ego sporting a barely-there ders, played by Portia Doubleday, moustache, is strangely unsettling is the mischievous, yet wildly in- at first, but it works. telligent seductress that becomes Though Youthin Revoltis worth the object of 1'wisp's affection. The watching, it docs have some downpair meets when 1\visp's mother sides. lt is quite short, and though and her boyfriend, played by Zack it's a comedy, the laughs are far Galifianakis, take him on a trip and few between. A subplot feato evade some vengeful sailors. turing Shccni's older brother Paul When Twisp and his family decide Saunders, played by Justin Long, to head home, he and Saunders is mildly entertaining, but feels scheme a plan to be reunited. She superfluous. The film also features

T

two animated driving montages, neither of which seemed relevant or necessary, but were not long enough to be much of a nuisance either.

As the film progresses it grows stranger and stranger, until it even feels like a legitimate plot device for Twisp to dress in drag. With a lesser cast, which also features Ray Liotta and Steve Buscemi, it would have undoubtedly been one of the worst films of the year.

Instead, Youthin Revoltis a charming, bewildering mess that leaves you with a smile.

What works about this film is that although it is a teen sex comedy, it hardly feels like one at all.

Although Twisp seems preoccupied with losing his virginity, it becomes clear that what he is really after is a companion. However, as a necessary evil of the genre, women are depicted as having horrifyingly bad taste in men throughout the film.

Youth in Revoltis at least worth a rent, but it is no classic. It has its

own little quirks, and a soundtrack that works well with its strangeness, but it doesn't do anything exceptional. It won't have you rolling on the floor, or talking about it for days to your friends, but it does have a few edgy lines and a few endearing moments that make it worth the watch.

ChannelSurtinu Mid-season Premieres Haitishould have been postponed so Smaflvillecould return, so I will simply say that the telethon was viewed by 83 million people and raised $61 million, which is pretty damn impressive. Smallville airs Friday nights at 8 p.m. on the CW. 24 premiered its eighth season on January 17 with four new episodes spread over two days.

Watching these episodes, I realized two things: 1.) for all the "twists" the show boasts, 24 is surprisingly formulaic. For instance, here are is still news about mid-season prethe things I know will happen in JORDAN PITCHER STAFF WRITER mieres and shows returning from an episode before l even watch it: hiatus that I neglected to men- Jack is going to yell/kick/shoot at ast week I devoted the entire tion in previous weeks and some someone, Jack is going to go "off column to,spitting venom at Jay cancellations that may or may not grid," Chloe is going to look dour, Leno and NBC, and it was beauti• come as a surprise to you. and the person that you think is ful an.d cathartic. Unfortunately Smallville's return from hiatus the traitor turns out to be a red for us all, I can't spend every week was postponed until Friday Janu- herring and the person you didn't saying bad things about people on ary 29 because of the Hopefor Haiti think was a traitor is, in fact, traitelevision that I don't like (or else telethon. I have been informed torous. 2.) Because 24 follows such this week's article would be about that it would be in the poorest of a strict formula, a drinking game David Caruso). However, there taste for me to argue that Hopefor can be formed around it. Drink

L

whenever anything from my list happens and you may not live to see the next episode, which might actually be a blessing. 24 airs Monday nights at 9 p.m. on FOX. Syfy aired the two hour season premiere of a BattlestarGalactica prequel of sorts, Caprica, on January 22nd. Despite having been available for almost a year on DVD and streaming on Syfy's website for a few weeks before the premiere, it managed to pull in 1.6m viewers. Capricais perfect for you if you were getting sick of all the theology muddying the pure sci-fi waters of BattlestarGalactica toward the end of the series. Caprica is the story of how humans brought about the.Ir own destruction on earth (by creating cylons).

For a program that is primarily science fiction, Capricaconsists of themes that arc largely human, such as the idea of morality and how our senses of grief, greed and

obsession can overshadow our morality and how everything begins to unravel oncf.?we cross the moral threshold. Capricaairs Friday nights at 9 p.m. on Space.

In cancellation news, this scatiOn will be Ugly Betty's last. That disturbance you just felt was the one Ugly Betty fan suddenly crying out in terror and suddenly being silenced.

Finally, last week the "stars" of JerseyShoredemanded MTV begin paying them $10,000 an episode because The Hills "stars" were making $100,000 an episode and The Hills never rated as high as Jersey Shore does. Instead of telling The Situation and Snooki to go take a flying fuck at a rolling donut, MTV caved and now the cast can all afford all the hair gel, bottle service, and eyebrow wax they could ever want. All ls well with the universe.

do away with the multitude of enemies as well. Shooterhas simple controls, a button for grappling, a button for shooting, and the analog sticks to aim and move.

Docks found in certain levels add the ability to shoot lava or water instead of missiles, a feature that drastically increases the unique puzzle aspects of the game.

Developed by Q-gamcs, Shooter marks the fourth game in the Pix-

eljunk series. All four games arc radically different, ranging from racing cars to tower defence. Despite the different genre, a similar style and look can be seen in each game. Shooteris the best game in the series, despite its short length.

Additional game content in the form of an "encore" download pack is expected in the next couple months.

Cascadelrcade Review ofPixelJunk Shooter forthePSN JOEL SMARTcreate clever puzzles that players STAFF WRITER must solve to progress. For example, when water touches magma, it ost of us in university re• creates destructible rock. If players member the days when vid- must get to an area below a pool of eoga mes were 20, had pixelated magma, finding a way to drench graphics, and simple controls. the area in water is likely the soluPixe/JunkShooterdraws on those tion. Racing through a water-filled classic inspirations, but with a environment as it turns into ice is modern twist (and crisp HD visu- also a cool dynamic. als). Available for download on the The game is relatively simple, PlayStation 3 for $10, Shooteris a which is unfortunate for more exshort, but engaging puzzle-driven perienced players, but it is also apspaceship shooter that is most fun preciated by those playing through to play through with a friend. with a non-gaming friend, sibling The aforementioned modern or parent. A hard mode with more twist comes in the form of highly enemies and one-hlt deaths would complex fluid dynamics. These flu- have been appreciated. ids range from erupting magma, Besides the short length, the cooling water, a highly flammable story is the weakest point of the gas, and a mysterious magnetic game. In a nutshell, players must fluid. Not only do these give the explore the caves of distant the environments a lot of personality, planet Apoxus Prime to rescue they interact with each other to the survivors of a mining ~ol4?ny.

M

The game is broken up into three distinct episodes, each featuring five stages and an enormous boss fight. Each of these 15 stages is composed of five short levels. Collecting all of the survivors unlocks the gate to the next level. Although 75 may seem like an adequate number of levels, they arc each quite small. Due to its addictive nature, most will finish the game either the first or second time they play it. Though collecting all the treasure and trophies adds considerable replay value to the game, it is unlikely most will bother with these secondary objectives.

Each ship comes equipped with two things, a grapple hook and a missile launcher. Players use the grapple hook to collect survivors, hidden treasure, and shields. The missile launcher is not just for shooting through rock, but also to

18

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

•-•-',sa•.-.•• ill. tl!lmml

I [ _1_l_l_1_1_1_1_1_l_1_1 __1__1_1_1_1_1_1_1_1_l_l_l_l_l_l_l_l_1_l_i_1_i_l_l_l_1_l_l_l_!_I_I_I_I

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Hoping Truman Made It Out Alright PAUL BRAMMER paperback cover, NEWS& OPINIONEDITOR and peeled open friend of mine died the other day. [ never met him, this friend; at least, not face to face. He was 91 when he passed away, leaving 69 years between us.

He lived un the cast coast of North America; I, the west.

1 can't really tell you anything about my friend. Nobody can, as it happens. The only thing I really know about him is the story that he left me.

My friend's name was JO Salinger. Shit, 1 didn't even know what the J and D stand for (it's Jerome David, apparently). But that doesn't change the fact that JD Salinger had the same effect on my life as only the closest confidante c11nhavt:!.

For thost:! who read The Catcher in the Ryeas adults, perhaps some of the book's lustre is lost; then again, maybe not. A classic is still a classic, despite the time and place in which you read it.

However, I read The Catcherin the Ryewhen I was 14. It was the English equivalent of grade eight, I think. I was 14, long-haired, fixated with Jimi Hendrix and John Frusciante. We took turns in class reading the story aloud and then going home to throw it into a corner until the next class rolled around.

But when I got home, I didn't throw the book away. I took it from my bag, ran my fingers O\Ter the

A

the pages, taking extra care to not mark the spine.

We finished readJng the book in class, and the end of every lesson would precipitatc my friends and 1 to huddle together and talk of the book - the way it so utterly gripped us, and the connection we felt with the main character, Holden (not to mention the anger and frustration and pity we felt towards the boy, who felt like kin from the moment we laid eyes on the page).

I'm holding it now as l write this book, the one with my original notes and underlinings in it, this collection of pieces of trees with black marks on them that made me feel a way that no other collection of words, or sounds, or images, has ever made me feel before or since.

TltcCatcltcrin UteRyemight leave some cold and mystify them as to the book's appeal, but r don't care. l lovc that book. I love the feelings

it arouses in me. I love Its simple beauty and passion. l love Holden Caulfield and I hope that he can feel better about himself and the world he found himself in.

I can't speak for Salinger himself - I know that he retreated from the public eye for the last 50or so years of his life. I know he continuously wrote, even after his semi-retire-

The FightForCanadianContent LINDA GIVETASH 11ILCORD want the perception of governhe future of Canadian content in the media is looking bleak.

T As cable companies and networks

-

continue to prefer American programming for its assured profit, both parties fight for revenue.

In the future, the cost of producing Canadian programs will likely be placed on the consumers or the shows themselves.

"It's a problem right now and there's a great fear that we're going to see the disappearance of local television in particular,'' explained Anne-Marie Kinahan, assistant professor of communication studies at Wilfrid Laurier University, adding that distinctly Canadian content will al1,obe impacted by this trend.

The Canadian Radio-television Telecommunications Commission (CRTC) has held ongoing hearings to develop new regulations to protect local television and Ca· nadian content. Public hearings in December 2009 opened the platform to consumers after previous private meetings were held during the year.

Although the CRTC has considered posing a 1:1 ratio for American to Canadian content, there is a concern about Imposing such regulations. Currently, the CRTC puts the onus on the networks and providers to follow their guidelines.

"They are Vt:!ryreluctant to use that power because they don't

ment interference in our industries or in our media," explained Kinahan.

Without stricter regulation, corporate entities - such as cable pro• vider Rogers Communications and networks including CTV - continue to hold the power in the media that is available to Canadians.

Steve Dotto, executive producer, writer and host of the informational show *Dotto Tech*,which aired on City'I'V until its cancellation last foll, expressed his concerns about the current climate.

"Now all these greedy large corporate entities are not happy with just making good profit, they want to make outrageous profit and with us paying for it," said Dotto.

Dotto, who experienced the changes first hand when his show was offered the ultimatum to pay the network or be canceled, explained that it's the small, locallyproduced shows that are getting cut as networks remain profit-conscious.

"I refused to do the show for them and then pay them money to be on the air like an infomercial," said Dotto.

As networks charge increasing amounts to air shows, the landscape becomes difficult for independent producers to break into the industry, while already-existing stations across the country are closing, including CTV's station

CKNX-TV in Wingham, Ont. With the cancellation of his show, Dollo found a new medium to provide his information: on the Internet.

"If people are consuming their local news on handheld devices, streaming into a Blackberry or into an iPhone or even online at the website as opposed to turning on channel 37 on their television, we should be honouring that," said Dotto.

Although the Internet offers new possibilities to provide content, Kinahan explained that it will not completely resolve the debate in the industry.

"There's still tremendous numbers of people that want to watch television on television in (their) living rooms," said Kinahan.

The undying popularity of television requires that networks and providers reach an agreement on how to fund local content.

"It's interesting that there has not been much talk of a way forward or a compromise or a solution," Kinahan noted.

The CinC hearings, the next of which will be held on Feb. 22, have thus far proved to be unproductive.

"What we sec as consumers is a very routine standardizing of content," said Kinahan. "The power lies with the broadcasters and the cable companies."

mcnt; he would put the books away in his house in New Hampshire once he had finished writing, and nobody would ever sec them.

I know he released three books after The Catcher i11 the Rye, but I never bothered with them.

In fact, l never read a word Salinger wrote outside of The Catclterin tlte Rye. My friend Ben did; he said he didn't really like the book he read. But that's not why I didn't. I didn't read anything else of Salinger's because it never crossed my mind; The Catcherin the Ryewas read, and that was it.

The Catcher in tltc Rye remains one of the most widely read books in the world - its eternal inclusion on high-school reading lists helps to keep it 1 that way. The Catcherin the Ryealso happens to be one of the most banned books in the world (especially in America, where several schools have it on their I/black list"), 1 can't think why - the only time Holden encounters the "f" word, he is incensed by il, as it has been scrawled on walls around a museum.

Why then? Is it because some small-minded person somewhere recognises the power of the book?

Do they see its abllity to enchant and mesmerise people, especially young people? Is it the validation that knowledge is indeed power, even if the power 1t imbues us with is so intangible as to be indefinable?

Regardless, this is all beside the point. The point is that The Catcher i11the Rye is arguably the single finest piece of American fiction of the twentieth century. Of course, this is up for debate, as there are innumerable masterpieces of American fiction in the last century.

But, consider that Tlte Calcherin the Rye was released in 1951;that's four years before Rebel Without A Cause,four years before Elvis Presley, 12 years before Beatlemania.

Salinger gave voice to a feeling that was brewing ln the post• WWII west. He predated most of the seminal works in several media that gave the rise to "the teenager" and "youth culture," movements that we could not conceive of as being absent from society today, so prevalent are they.

But I'm losing sight of what l wanted to say. I wanted to wish my friend well on the new journey he has embarked upon; I hope he finds his way. I will miss him, I'm sure, but I will always find solace and comfort in the words he has left us. Nobody can ever lake that away; nobody can ever eradicate the impact he has had on my life, and the lives of countless others.

To me, he'll always be my catcher in the rye.

The Cascade Liquor Cabinet PornStars ½ oz rasberry sour puss ½ oz blue curacao

This stuff i:; stJcky, sweet, and purple. Definietely more tangy then sweet. Easily stains your hands if you are a sloppy drinker.

Not something you mind drinking for a fun night and to get things started with the ladles, but in the morning it may hurt to brush your teeth.

Sweet 9/10 Sour 5/10 Bitter 0/10 Burn 0/10

JackFrost ¾ oz Jack Daniels Whiskey ¼ oz Peppermint Schnapps

This is a personal favorite.

You know that feeling when you breathe in winter air first thing in the morning? Ya, that's exactly what you arc getting with this drink. For those that can't handle the taste of whiskey but still love the effects, the peppermint flavor gently masques the whiskey burn.

Sweet 4/10 Sour 0/10 Bitter 1/10 Burn 6/10

Now when you go to a bar and you ask for a drop shot, chances are the bartender will either give you a jagerbomb or a vitamin C. Both of which a re considered to be an acquired taste so let's try something different:

Bottle Cop ½ oz raspberry sour puss ½ oz rootbccr schnapps

Drop into 1 ½oz 7-up ½ oz margarita mix

I am not one to say that a lot of shots taste like their names, but the bottle cap is by for one of the closest to it. It might give you that nose twitch feeling you sometimes get from sour candy, but it is definitely worth it.

Sweet 8/10 Sour 6.5/10 Bitter 0/10 Burn 0/10

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

WILLJAM THE THESPIAN and

take new oppo.rtunitles as DIVINER TO THESTARS they appear. Just remember superWilliam theOstentatious Thespian ficial love never lasts.

here,

THE CASCADE

THE CASCADE

Taurus: April 20-May20

rather avoid.

side this week.

Leo: July23-August 22

Scorpio: October 23-November 21

You will overcome many troubles and problems as you search for spiritual meaning in yourself, but be careful that you don't start overcoming others for an ego boost as you won't realize the emotional drain from it until it's too late.

You may not know what the problem is, but don't let the fear of the unknown cause rifts in your relationships. Simply take everything on a case by case basis to find balance in your personal affairs.

to answering perplexing problems that lie ahead. Feel free to act on your ambitions. Luck is on your

You're having trouble making a decision, so the best strategy is to

19

retreat, rest and recover. Not only wilt it prevent you from losing valuable things, it will allow you to employ a new way of thinking that will help you get a new start on the problem at hand.

Thisweekwasa toughweek lf you lack the confidence to do fordivination, butt~roug_h something, just trust your intu• Aquarius: January 20•February 18 perseverance andthewillto ition and keep the fear of failure succeed, I havebrought youyour at bay when you step out of that If you stop looking back on past mistakes or heartbreak, then horoscopes forthenextlittlebit.As safety zone. Now is the time to a great burden wiJI be lifted from a general noteforeveryone, things change, so have faith in yourself. your mind. Failure to do so may Virgo: August 23 -September 22 Sagittarius: November 22 arehappening sojumpintothe result in you becoming egotistical Gemini: Moy 21 June 20 December 21 thickofitandfindoutwhat's going and vain. Just rely on your own on.Other thanthat,keeponopen Ever sec Alfred Hitchcock's The The solution known as "the If you refuse to face your prob- judgement and accept what has mindandwatch thestars.Theymay Birds?

Well expect your week to be quick fix" is only temporary. Be- lems, you may come across as self- happened. notbeabletotellyouthefuture, much of the same, except with ba• 1ieve that your abilities can carry ish, childish, or anth.ocial. Even if buttheydolookpretty, sowatch nana slugs. you through, or the procrastina- you're having difficulty dealing Pisces: February 19-March 20 away! tion of doing things "the long with them, you must stay and face You are perhaps a bit too critithe situation, for it will do you way" may occur. (oncer: June21-July22 good to use your mental dexterity. cal of yourself, what you need to William do is to slow down and listen to An overemphasis of money Libra: September 23-October 22 will fill you full of conflict and Capricorn: December 22-January yourself. Remember to use your creative energies to find new ways anger. So, Be wary of any expectaKeeping an open mind is vital 19 Aries: Morch 21-April 19 A sure way to victory with a relationship is to shake things up

tions or opportunities to indulge excessively, for this may lead to negative events which you would

to communicate with yourself, instead of putting them towards pleasure.

CHEF BEE COOKINGUPTROUBLE

Thisweekit'sallaboutthevegetarians andhealthnuts.

I hovesearched forandwideforrecipes thatorehealthy andperfectly animal friendly.

We'll startwitha peanut butterandbroccoli tofustirtryfortheentree, homemade delicious granola fora snack, andfordessert, ricotta cheese (homemo~e!) withvarious fruits.

Peanut Butter andBroccoli Tofu StirFry Ingredients: l tablespoon peanut butter 1 tablespoon hot water 1 tablespoon cider vinegar 1 tablespoon soy sauce 2 teaspoons olive oil 3 cups chopped broccoli 2 cloves garlic minced ½ kg block of firm tofu, cut into small cubes

a wide surface area. This will help your curds cook more quickly. Line the colander with a large piece of cheesecloth that has been folded numerous times• until you have aboul five or six layers. Place the lined colander over a large bowl or sink.

When the mixture reaches about 175F degrees, you will see the curds and whey separate (the curds are the clumpy white mass). Now, remove the pan from heat, and gently begin to ladle curds into the prepared sieve. Pull up on the sides of the cheesecloth to drain off any extra liquid, but resist pressing on the curds. Gather the edgesof the cloth, and tic or fasten them into a knot and allow them to drain for another 15 minutes minimum. Move to an airtight container and refrigerate if you aren't going to use it immediately. Try to use or eat it within a few days.

Ricotta can be used for many things: pastas, frittatas, and so on. In this case, we are going to use it for a dessert. If you drizzle honey on it and pair it with whatever fruit is in season (berries, melons, cantaloupes, etc.) it makes a delicious dessert.

try a reduction of any of these simmered on the stove with apple juice until thick) 1 cup of dried fruit (dried cranberries, dried cherries, d ricd apricot, raisins, goji berries)

Granola

Directions: First put the oats in the largest bowl you can find. Chop the nuts for bite-size clusters, or leave them whole for heartier clusters. Add to the oats. Pour the sweetener over the oat mixture and stir with a wooden spoon. Add cinnamon and salt.

Pour the mixture onto baking sheets in a thin layer. Bake in 350F degree oven for 20-30 minutes. Check every five minutes to prevent burning. The longer you leave it in, the crunchier the granola will become.

Put the mixture back in a bowl (il will be in clusters now).

Add the fruit and stir. This step is imperative; if you put the fruit in the oven, it will burn.

Let granola cool and pack it in an airtight container.

This granola will make an cxccllcnl snack for any late night study sessions or in class. It could also be an excellent breakfast if you add it to some yogurt.

Directions; In a small bowl, stir together the peanut butter, hot water, vinegar, and soy sauce. lf it is difficult to mix, heat it in the microwave for 10 seconds. Warm the oil in a large nonstick pan over high heat. Add the broccoli and garlic and cook for five minutes, stirring constantly. Add in the tofu, and cook for an additional five minutes. Remove from heal. Mix in the sauce until the tofu and broccoli are well coated. Steam until broccoli is at its desired tenderness.

Ricotta Ingredients: 1 gallon good-quality whole milk 1 quart good-quality buttermilk Directions: Combine both milks into a large nonreactive saucepan over medium high heat, preferably a thick-bottomed pan if you have one. You will need to stir occasionally, scraping the pan bottom, to avoid scorching. Once the milk is hot, stop stirring. You will start to see curds rise and come to the surface. Run a spoon or spatula along the bottom of the pan occasionally to free up any stuck curds.

While the milk is heating, select a sieve or colander with

Ingredients: 6 cups of rolled oats (not quick cooking or instant) 2 cups of mixed nuts and seeds (try sunflower seeds, almonds, pumpkin seeds, cashews, walnuts, sesame seeds, pecans, pistachios, flax seeds) 1 cup unsweetened coconut (optional) A few teaspoons of cinnamon (to taste) A pinch of salt 1 cup of liquid sweetener (honey, agave, maple syrup or

Until next tim.e, Bon Appetit!

20

The

THE CASCADE

Fornication timing of your ejaculation, VIRGINIA SLIMS

Conversation and the

HANDSFREE HOUDINI ability to aim and fire your semen

D

earest poppets, you know I'm always looking out for your gf,)nitals,both metaphorically and literally. So this week, J offer you et>Sential information on keeping our naughty bitt>in peak shape for bumpin' uglies nnd all those other things that involve your downstairs - stuff like childbirth and hanging towels of£ your rodney to impress your hockey team in the locker room. Important stuff.

Let's start off with a biology lesson, because I am first and foremost a scientist. There's this muscle in your danger zone that not only holds all your junk in place, but also controls a lot of special functions. The pelvic floor muscle is key in unfon things like incontinence, and fun things like force of ejaculation. There is a way to keep this muscle in tip top condition so that these things fall under your control, and you'll finally be able to perform party tricks with your wienies and bajingos.

Men, l know you sometimes feel neglected by V, as the whole notowning-a-pen is thing makes me a little more inclined to offer advice to vagina-havers. Well, lucky you, pumpkins, I have all sorts of goodies for you this week.

Have you ever wanted to con• trol all aspects of your orgasrn including firmness of your member,

with great skill? Of course you have. Kegel exercises can do that.

Kegel exercises involve tightening, holding and releasing the pelvic floor muscle several times a day. Don't know how to clench your pelvic floor muscle? Oh, don't worry about that poppcts, I've got you covered.

There are two fun ways to find that muscle, and you may choose depending on how hands on you want to get. One way to do it is to start peeing and then cut yourself off midstream. The muscle that you're using to do that is the one you want to isolate and work on.

The other way is to stick a finger up your back door and try lo clench around it. And hey, if you're into anal stimulation, have your partner lend a hand and/or penis, and involve your lover in the experiment.

Once you've found it, you can do the exercises anywhere and anytime, just don't overdo it. You can find specific workout schedules Online that are tailor fit to your age and experience, just like any

Male Edition JACK DANIELS

DARK!:S I 01-rHl DARKLIQUORS the date. You have a few options for th\) second half, depending on was recently askf.)d to do a col- what you have left in your wallet. umn as a counter part to Virgin- If things are going not so well, or ia's "Fornication Conversation," - you need lo get to know her some a male's point of view to add to the more, you might want to try someconversation, if you will. I wai;n't thing like a walk on th!.)boardwalk sure if I was up for something like or through the city {make sure this, but 1 figured why not give it a it's not a city like Mission). This shot; maybe I do have something is both cost efficient and allows you to either to offer to this get the much topic. I figured needed face should start time, or at least with a cost lets you cul comparison of your losses in a taking a girl cheap fashion. out for dinner If things arc versus paying going well, you for the servicwould probes of an escort ably veer lo• (for those of wards a movie you who don't to have some know, escort is lime alone in a nice word for the dark; this hooker). will run you at Let's break this down from the guys point of least another 40 to 50 bucks.

Let's add it up: $120 for dinview. When you take a girl out on a date you are automatically going ner and a friendly good night, or almost $200 bucks for dinner and to have to shell out somf,) money with no guarantee of anything in a little bit of tongue in the movie return. Let's break it down into theatre. Sounds like a lot of money for a girl you might not even like. numerical figures. First things Now let's do the math on the esfirst: you are going to have to pick her up - girls don't pick guys up cort or hooker (whatever helps you for dates (most people don't factor sleep at night). You pay her $200or in fuel costs on a date). so and she lets you do what ever So right there, let's say you are you want to her for an hour. Now out 20 bucks for gas, and that's if whether you want your hooker for you have a fuel efficient vehicle or sex or listening to your problems the distance you travel is relatively for an hour it's totally up to you, minimal. Then you'll have to pay it's your hooker - for the hour. for dinner. Some girls will make Maybe even five minutes of sex the argument that it would be a and 55 minutes of her listening good idea to split the bill, don't to your problems. Its totally up to give in to this. If you do, you're you, with a hooker .

God bless women with loose pretty much done; girls hate cheap guys on the first date. So let's bud- morals, which is most women I get th is part of the date at $100for guess. If they'll have me back, next the both of you, and that's if you're week I'll talk about internet data cheap fuck. ing, docs it work? And should you Now comes the second half of try it?

I

...

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY5th, 2010

other exercise. When you clench, you should see your testicles lift... which is fun in itself, lsn't it?

In four to six weeks, you should start to see rf'sults in your ability to control your semen expulsion in fun and exciting ways. As for the boring medical stuff, it's also grf.)at for your prostate health and urinary tract.

Mainly, your dick will be-

it's good. But first, let's ta Ik science. Your pelvic muscles are very important not only for the benefits to the urinary tract and sexual talents, but also because neglect and age can wreak havoc on your downstairs. I won't go into details but let's remember that this muscle keeps all your lady organs in place.

We want to keep them in place.

TI1ings like pregnancy, childbirth, becoming overweight, aging, and suffering from a chronic cough e o m e can all take a toll on your pelvic floor muscles, so it's important to strong enough to keep them in good shape. support Finding your pelvic floor mus• a heavy cle is a fun little experiment that to w e 1 involves inserting a digit or two into your vag and trying to clench around it. Just like I told the men, this is easily made into a game for two.

Once you've found it, then practice clcnchi ng, holding and releasing, when hard and if that isn't with the intensity of the workout something to put on your resume, depending again on your age, exI don't know what is. perience and state of your uterus.

Now ladies, Kegels can work Now, the benefits - oh the benwonders for you as well. Don't tell efits. Well, firstly, these exercises the men, but I have a treat for you can make sexual pleasure and that will rival the skills of semen orgasms more intense. They can shooting and towel holding. Oh, even enable women who have nev-

er had a vaginal orgasm to cxpe• rience one. Fancy that. What happens is that the exercises increase the blood flow within the pelvic area, which in turn Increases the sensations you'll feel both vaginally and clitorally. You can even pass the joy onto your partner by clenching while he's inside of you.

This contraction is what happens when you experience an orgasm, and therefore has pleasurable value for you as well as him.

Since this technique holds sexual pleasure, you can arouse yourself before sex, darlings, by clenching and holding, then releasing.

And, if you're quite practiced you can masturbate hands-free. Oh yes, poppets, you can get off without even lifting a finger.! could be masturbating as I type this and you'd never know. This ought to make boring classes and meetings a little more interesting.

Well, lovelies, there you go.

Now you know how to have an orgasm on the way home from class while still obeying the new hands•frf,)e laws, arid how to deliver a super-soaker qua lily facial.

Just remember not to Hex your abs, thighs or ass when you're doing Kegel exercises; focus only on the pelvic floor muscle. And once you've located the muscle, don't continue to stop your urinary flow mid-stream. That'll just hurt you rather than help you. Happy kegels, poppets.

Sometimes Three's A Crowd JEAN KEU£RLlllG

THEXAVRIAN WEEKLY ing sexual fluidity; rather, sexual

fluic;lityhas been manipulated into f there is one sexual act whose a form of heterosexual activity. burgeoning popularity has Croup sex can be means of reraised it to cull-like status among bellion against patriarchal ideals young people, it is the threesome. of heterosexual, monogamous reA sure-fire way to test this as- lationships. It can be an empowsertion is to see if Britney Spears ering experience about cl,1iming is singing about it (check). Hers pleasure. This is only true, howmight even be a MMF (male-male- ever, if all parties involved are female) threesome, although we involved because they want lo be, probably shouldn't read too far and not because a partner is prf.)Sinto that; the psyche of Britney's suring them into it.

Group sex dynamics and symwriters is hardly of unfathomable bolism arc powerful and can ruin depths.

While the threesome hJs been ri!lationships. Threesomf.):; havf.) enjoying pop culture infamy re- provided plenty of fodder for decently, the concept is hardly a new bate. After all, likf.)in all :;ex, powone. Depiction of orgies in art is er dynamics play a role, and these surprisingly prevalent, most nota- are compounded by the pervasive bly in the *Kama Sutra*, which has depiction of threesomes and group been kicking around for centuries sex in pornogrnphy.

While we might want to believe under teenagers' bt>ds.

Though promiscuity is gener- that we aren't affected by the con• ally frowned upon, and public sex flicting messages that surround us, we can't take is often taboo if not illegal, the desire lo sexual acts out of engage in such sex"The fetishization their cultural conual acts has been of group sex does text.

Whether confetishized over the not necessarily mean there has been a sciously or not, past years as idealized depictions inmove towards an pornography and crease in number. acceptance of sexual media have played fluidity" a role in why we Entire books could are engaging in be written focusthreesomes. 'fhat ing on the sexual culture of threesomes, and pit- does not mean that all non-conting the pros and cons against one ventional sex is intrinsically bad, another would result in quite the but being informed becomes very debate, both sides having potent important. Give *Bitch Magazine* a try: they frequently write blog arguments.

A notable point is the fact that posts responding to the array the fetishization of group sex does of group sex depictions in pop not necessarily mean there has culture and what it means for been a move towards an accep· the youth and adults exposed to tance of sexual fluidity; indeed them. whether the threesome is MMF, PPM or any other combination or **Pick yourpeople** number, the "queer" aspect often Conventional wisdom states veils heterosexual desire.

In other words, the increased that the only good position to be in popularity of threesomes and during a threesome is the "stranger" brought in by a couple, due to group sex does not necessarily mean that we arc actually accept- the intricacies of relationship dy-

I

namics that can be upset by such an event There is no algorithm for the perfect mix of people in a threesome, and communication is always key.

When T interviewed a friend about her experience, she said "'Irle two people I did have (a threesome) with were in a relationship and they were very comfortable with the idea."

Comfort with the idea is ccnteredoncommunication: for things to go smoothly, f.)ach participant must voice his or her opinion on the other potential participants.

As in any sexual relationship, some level of attraction lo the participants is necessary for an enjoyable experience and going along with things with people you aren't keen on will lead to one thing and one thing only: bad sex.

**Be safe** As in all forms of sex, protec• tion, both against STDs and unwanted pregnancies is paramount.

During threesomes, where one participant's sexual history may be comparatively unknown, this becomes an even more pressing issue. Discuss ahead of time what precautionary measures are necessary.

**Discuss boundaries** If you are not comfortable discussing the who, what, where and how of Sex, then you are certainly not in a position to be having sex with multiple people at once.

It is important to discuss ahead of time what you arc and arc not comfortable with. For example, your boyfriend may be aware of the fact that you aren't comfortable with anal sex, but if buddy beside you hasn't been informed of that detail then you arc setting your• self up for unpleasant surprises.

21

THE CASCADE

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5th, 2010

Canucks Trample Leafs With Five Unanswered Goals

WEEKLY CASCADE UPDATE This week our Cascades have been working hard: - The men's basketball team lost on Friday 56-55 to the UVic Vikes, after a hard £9!!ghtbattle.

-Saturday they won over the UVic Vikes 79-77

JOEL SMART STAFF WRITER With nearly weryone predicting a win on Saturday afternoon against the Toronto Maple Leafs, the Vancouver Canucks set themselves up for failure early. After the Canucks went down 3-0 in arguably their worst period of the season, the Canucks owned the game for its last two thirds. Despite the sloppy, awful play of the Canucks in the first period, they more than made up for it with discipline and hard work to come back and win the game.

As odd as it is to say, there could not have been a better night to pu II Roberto Luongo. Andrew Raycroft, a former Leaf, stepped in for Roberto Luongo at the beginning of the second period. Because Raycroft was bought out by the Leafs at the end of the 2007-2008 season, he is actually still on their payroll. Essentially, the Leafs paid Raycroft to play against them. You could tell that Raycroft appreciated the opportunity to play against his old team when he began to signal to fans as the game ended.

It was nice to see Raycroft play again, considering the huge role he played earlier in the season when Luongo was injured. Although he didn't have to make any jaw-dropping saves, he is to be commended for remaining composed during a penalty kill late in the third period with the score tied.

This is only the second time this season that the Canucks have had a notably excellent come-from-be-

,

'j

-On Friday the women's basketball team lost to the UVic Vikes 71-49 -Saturday they lost 84-46 to the UVic Vikes -The men's volleyball team played on Friday and they beat Capilano College 3-2 -Saturday they won over Capilano 3-1 -The women's volleyball team lost on Friday in three straight to Capilano College -Saturday £hey lost lo Capilano 3-1

This weekend, Feb 5-6, is the final home weekend for all Cascade teams. There will be great entertainment and prizes! Remember it's free for students so come out and how your support! hind victory. The first time was almost exactly a month ago, whim the Canucks came back against the St. Louis Blues on New Year's Eve. In both games, the Canucks were down 3-1 after two periods but found a way to come back. In the Blues game, the win came in overtime The Sedin line, with the Sedin twins and Alexander Burrows, combined for a total of nine points, four of which were from Burrows.

Both Oanlel Sedin and Burrows scored two goals each. As much as one can say about their play in the third period, it was really the shorthanded goal by Burrows in the second period that sparked the Canucks win. Burrows has a lot of positive qualities to tout this year, such as his second-in-the-league plus-minus rating of 30 (the Sedins are fifth and sixth). However,

ri

it is his ability to score at key times - to be a difference maker when it counts - that is most impressive about him.

Such a positive finish to the first game of the longest road trip in NHL history is a positive sign, especially considering the team is currently missing three of its top four defencemen. There is no doubt that the Leafs are a terrible team (the only team worse than the Leafs right now is the Edmonton Oilers), but if the Canucks can score five unanswered goals to win a game with their backup goaltender in and some key defencemen out due to injury, that says a lot about what this team is capable of. The Canucks are currently sixth in the NHL, third in the Western Conference, and first in the Northwest Division.

Heat Reoort )

'>'?"'

I=Ieathad a chance at redemption as they faced off for game two of the double header against the Stars. The Heat JUSTIN ORLEWICZ got off to another STAFF WRIfER dismal start, going down 2-0 early in the game. Abby battled he struggling Abbotsford Heat back with two quick almost got another week's rest goals late in the secbefore getting in the rink with the ond from Cam Cun• Texas Stars. The second place Stars ning and David Van were in town earlier this month der Culik. ttowever, for a series with the Heat, dur- the Stars answered ing which the Stars got swept 2-0. back with two goals The Heat have only taken four of a of their own in the possible 12 points since they swept third period. The the Stars, so the Heat was hoping game finished in a to get back to their winning ways 4-2 Stars win. The Heat allowed in this series. However, this time it another power play goal in this was on rich Texas soil. contest, making it 16 power play Despite being well rested, the goals against them in their last Heat got off to another awful start, eight games. allowing the first goal 9:16minutes The Heat are now on a four into the first period. By the end of game losing streak, and have only the first, they were down 2-1. The won one game in their last eight. second and third period weren't They will make a stop in Houston much better for the Heat, as they on Monday to play a single game allowed two more goals in each against the Aeros before they head period without answering back home for a series with the Chicago - making it a 6-1 final in favour of Wolves. the bad guys. Once again, penalFuture NHL Hall-of-Farner ties and power play goals against - and multiple time Stanley Cup were a problem for the Heat; they Champion - Chris Chelios plays were issued four fighting majors, for the Chicago Wolves, so the five minor penalties with two Heat should expect a good turn power play goals against. Jason out to see the hockey legend. CheJaffray got the lone goal for Abby. lios signed with the Wolves early Less than 24 hours later, the in the year with the hopes of even~·

' r

-------------

T

tually jumping into the starting roster for their NHL affiliate, the Atlanta Thrashers.

So far Chelios hasn't had the chance to jump into any NHL action with the Tiuashers, but he has put up very respectable numbers in the AHL this season. The first game against the Wolves will be Feb 4, then game two will go the following night {which also happens to fall on UFV student night).

The puck drops at 7:30p.m ..

The Heat now sits in fourth in the north division and tenth in the western conference. On a positive note, despite the Heat's losing skid, they are still only four points out of the playoff picture. If they sweep the Wolves, they are right back in the playoff hunt.

Inside the Locker Room JUSTIN ORLEWIUpre-maturely. What he did to Ladd STAFF WRITER could have resulted in a very seri• ous injury for both of them. Kesler should have kept his mouth shut t has been another eventfu I week on this occasion because he was in in the hockey world. There are the wrong, but we all know that a couple of local hot topics; first, talking is part of Kesler's game. the follow up to the Alexander This incident should be continued Burrows incident. After Ron Ma- the next time the Canucks and the cLean's comments about Burrows Blackhawks face off. on the Jan 16 broadcast of Hockey Blackhawk forwards Patrick Night in Canada,it seems that the Kane and Kris Versteeg have deCanucks have decided to boycott veloped a great fondness for the the CBC. The Canucks refused Roxy nightclub on Granville street. all player and staff interview re- After the game on Saturday, Verquests from the CBCon last week's steeg, Kane, and John Madden debroadcast, when the Canucks beat cided to go for a night out in Van the Blackhawks 5-1. Officially, the City. The three went to the Roxy Canucks are simply stating that night club and then left the club in they are "trying to move on," but a limousine filled with Roxy puck sources say that the Canucks are ladies. Pictures from their night furious with HockeyNight in Cana- out have since surfaced and can da, and they are calling MacLean's be seen on various websites. This comments a "one-sided character is not the first time that Patrick assassination."

Kane and Kris Versteeg have been Last week, the Vancouver Ca- spotted at the Roxy; just last year, nucks forward Ryan Kesler called before the playoff series with the out Chicago Blackhawk forward Canucks, I personally saw them Andrew Ladd on national televi- pulling the same tricks after a Version. Kesler called Ladd "a cow- sus the Nothing show at the world ard" and said: "At least he was famous bar. man enough to hit me when I I hate to be the kind sports writwas looking this time. He cross- er that speculates about something checked me in the face [last year] one week, and then when it comes and broke my nose when I wasn't true the next week, say "l told you looking." This conflict between so," but I'm going to have to do it Kesler and Ladd stems back from a anyway.

"I told you so!" Dion Phaneuf hit that Ladd laid on Kesler in last year's playoffs. Ladd responded to is now a member of the Toronto Kesler's comments by saying: "It's Maple Leafs. The Leafs made pretty to tough to take when we two blockbuster trades on Sunsquare off and he takes one shot, day morning following a blown and then decides he wants to bail lead loss against the Canucks the on the fight and really pretty much previous night. Toronto had been just throw me down." Ladd contin- working on a trade with the Calaued: "I think anyone who has seen gry Flames for the past week that both videos can make their own see Matt Stajan, Jamal Mayers, Ian conclusions. The first one we kind White and Niklas Hagman going of ran into each other and he took to the Flames for Dion Phaneuf, the worst of it. It's too bad, but I'm Fredrik Sjostrom and top prospect not going to lose any sleep about Keith Aulie. This trade will also it. The last one was pretty obvious. affect the Abbotsford Heat, as deWe squared off, he took a shot and fenceman Keith Aulie is currently then didn't really seem to want to playing next door at the AESC for the Abbotsford Heat. This means fight anymore.

"I'm a pretty honest player and that Aulie will now be playing for I play the game hard and fair, and the Toronto Marlies. if he wants to whine about it, go The second big trade of the ahead. It seems like he had a lot day was a deal with the Anaheim of stuff bottled up. He was talk- Ducks that has J.S. Giguere coming lots before but didn't really say ing to Toronto in exchange for much after the fight. He was pret- Vesa Toskala and overpaid Jason ty quiet. I'll do the rest of my talk- Blake. The back end is looking ing on the ice." From an outsider's great for the Toronto Maple Leafs; point of view, it looks like Kesler all they need now is more scoring is the one who broke the warriors than Phil Kessel on the front end, code. Kesler did square off with and they just might have a shot at Ladd and then decide to end the tilt a cup in a few years.

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THE CASCADE

FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

Road to the Super Bowl TREYQRFIK STAFFWRITER

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ith Super Bowl 44 in Miami just days away, both squads are sticking to tradition in an attempt to gain a psychological edge over the opposite team. The Colts are following their game-winning Super Bowl 41 formula, i;taying in the same Marriott Harbor Beach Resort in Fort Lauderdale that they did when they beat the Bears. The Colts also practiced in the same facility, lining up behind the same quarterback, and a number of other players who remember the game as if it was yesterday.

The game also lies heavily on the Saints side of the ball. Coming in to the game as the Super Bowl underdogs, you can bet that they are practicing how they are going Loplay. That is, with a chip on their shoulder, and with something to prove. It's not often that the top two seeds from each division manage to reach the Super Bowl and face each other. In fact, the last time this occurred was in 1993when the Buffalo Bills faced off against the Dallas Cowboys.

News this week on the Colts' front has been centred around allpro defencive end Dwight Frceney's possible absence from the game. The six-foot one, 270 pound defender has been a staple of the Colts' defence for the past eight seasons. ESPN.com is reporting "a torn ligament which would make it 'difficult' for Freeney to play in the Super Bowl." With the speed of a man half his size, and patented spin move that has made many a quarterback stain their spandex shorts, Freeney's absence will allow gunslinger Drew Brees ample opportunity to throw touchdowns all day.

Frecney's injury is only a drop in the bucket for a Colts defence that has been battered all season long by illness and injury. Starting all-pro safety Bob Sanders was ruled inactive as early as game three, following a devastating season ending injury to his tom left bicep tendons. Coincidentally, his replacement, strong safety Melvin Bullitt, sat out practice this past week with the Colts due to a nagging knee injury.

Obviously, losing Freeney will hurt the Colts, but the question is to what degree? Odds makers are already favouring Peyton Manning to win the games most valuable player award 2-3, and it is my

belief that this wlll be Manning's game.

Manning has the experience factor on his side, as docs the entire Indianapolis Colts squad. lt was just three Super Bowls ago that the Colts controlled the Chicago Bears on the way to a 29-17 victory. The Colts' team possesses seven players from that year, giving them the edge over the Saints who are in their first Super Bowl appearance and have only four players who have previously played in a Super Bowl game.

Although the match is expected to be dominated by the passing game, expect to see a thorough rushing attack from both sides.

The FantasySportsCorrelation JORDAN PITCHER

STAFFWRITER same year. Thirty million (probably more by now) people are participating in an array of fantasy s much as I wish it were so, sports ranging from hockey to the term "fantasy sports" docs professional wrestling, so there not apply to Quidditch, Pod Rac- is no question of popularity. That ing, or Tri-Dimensional Chess. In- still leaves two glaring questions: stead, it describes something that Who is playing? And why are they could be the key to bridging the, playing? until now, untraversiblc divide beThe answer to the latter questween two social groups that have tion is pretty elementary if you been at odds with each other since consider why anyone participates the dawn of man: "Nerds" and in any pastime: pleasure, excite"Jocks" (Note: Personally, I think ment, camaraderie, etc. However, both terms are infantile. However, what separates this from other, for the sake of argument, I need more vanilla, pastimes ls the fanto separate two groups into black tasy element and the escapism implicit in pretending to be someone and white terms).

For the uninitiated, a fantasy you're not and playing with teams sport is when the participant as- that don't exist. It is this facet of sumes the role of the owner of a the fantasy sports experience that sports team. The next step is to will provide us with the answer to build a team (consisting of indi· the question of who is playing. The vidual players) usually through a answer is: the people who play lottery that will establish the par- fantasy sports are the role-players ticipant's place in the draft. Once and nerds of the jock world. the team is built, the participant In fact, I'm going to go so far as competes against other teams in to say that fantasy sports are the the league they belong to. As the jock equivalent of Dungeons and season progresses, score is tabu- Dragons. Here's why: latcd by converting the statistics The Stigma: Just as the nerds of the individual players on each a re given the scarlet letter for rat· tling off the stats of their Level team into a point system.

Despite its niche status, fantasy Five Warforged Paladin, jocks arc sports are a huge hobby, with an often met with looks of derision estimated 30 million North Amer- from their friends who are into icans ages 12 and up participat- sports, but do not demonstrate the ing in 2007 alone, and accounting same unbridled enthusiasm as the for a $3-$4 billion impact on the fantasy sports enthusiast does.

The Statistics: Though computNorth American economy in the

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Manning has to rely on Joseph Addai and Donald Brown to get enough yards to be able to fake the run and use the play-action.

Nobody is expecting a 200 yard rushing game from these guys, but they have to at least show the other side they are not willing to be manhandled.

From the Saints' perspective, look to see the squad rushing heavily to Dwight Freeney's side, if he is ln the game. If not, expect to see Reggie Bush, Pierre Thomas and Mike BeJ1push to that side of the ball all game long.

Curious to see how much tickets were going for, I did some digging online. A pair of lower bowl

tickets for the event will set you back a cool $5000.

That is not including the flight down and accommodations. And at this point, good luck finding any place to stay this side of Boston.

Miami has become footba II central for a period of two to three weeks, as the NFL moved the pro-bowl from its traditional spot after the Super Bowl, to the bye-week in between the conference championship games and the Super Bowl. With an attendance of 70,000 fans, the AFC won 41-34.Highlights include Houston quarterback Matt Schaub throwing for 189 yards and lwo touchdowns.

Schaub was named the player of the game for his efforts.

After the game, both quarterba~ks Peyton Manning and Tom Brady were named to the NFL's 53 member all-decade team. A team that includes Warren Sapp, and former Seattle Seahawks running-back Shaun Alexander.

And for those who could care less about the game itself, and are just looking forward to see who has been lined up for the half-time show, this year does not disappoint.

The Who has been booked fox the appearance in Sun Life Stadium in Miami Gardens on Feb 7. Expect to hear "Teenage Wasteland," as either the first or last song. The line, "Out here in the fields, l fight for my meals," seems only too fitting for a classic gridiron battle.

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crs have done a great deal in lightening the load for both groups, the careful consideration of the stats of objects/ players still plays a large role in each pastime. For Instance, a jock will pore over the stats of last season to determine whether or not a particular quarterback will make a valuable addition to the team. Similarly, a nerd will thoroughly examine the stats of a Cold Iron Greatsword when compared with a Blteback Sword and decide which is best for the current situation.

Some Broader Similarities: The r• ...,,._, league functions much in the same way an adventuring group does, r.. 1111tM1• and the team acts in the same capacity as a hero in that it is constantly being modified by changes

by JimKeogh in roster/changes in equipment. & Nunziata _, : : : ,,ar ,These are two of many other broad brush similarities that can be drawn.

What I'm trying to say, in my own Each year the BCNU annual convention brings together special roundhundreds of nurse• from across the province to learn, about way, is that we're all not so work and have fun together In beautlful Vancouver, BC. different from Why not Join other student reps as a Fraser Valley student each other. Sure, participant- all expenses paldl your fantasy deals in sports and mine deals in storytelling, but at their core they are both www.bcnu.org fantai;y.And that's ntact FV Region Chair Linda Pipe /p/pe@bcnu.org something we can for more Information or to enter your application come together on .

A Referencefor the Restof usr

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FRIDAY,FEBRUARY5th, 2010

THE CASCADE

23

The Hangover Cure KENDRA MCPHEE

CONTRIBUTORtern and keeps dehydration at bay (dehydration is the cause of those ou're lying in bed with a pick- nasty headaches). axein your brain, your stomach rolls around like a ship in a storm, Justdrink somemore: it feels as if cotton is pouring out Some say the only way to cure of your mouth, and you can't even a hangover is to drink yourself imagine the sun without cring- through it. Careful though, you ing. As you bury your face in the don't want to get so drunk you end pi11ow,hoping your head doesn't up with a headache later on, you implode from the pressure, the only thing you can think is "I am never drinking again."

Then again, everyone has said this at one point, and most people have said it so often it has become a morning after mantra.

How can something so good the night before be such a consequence the next morning?

Since the creation of alcohol, man has been trying to create that ever elusive hangover cure. Here is a list of "cures," just want a nice little buzz to coast some that are possible and some over the worst of it. Bloody Marys that must be one man's attempt to arc the best for this, so the story make his best friend puke again goes, because of the vitamins in the tomato juice. But if you are a just for a laugh. brave sou I, you should try some Water: "Hair of the Dog," which is a comProbably the best cure next to bination of gin and hot sauce. not drinking at all. That isn't to say that doing a keg-stand from Pickle Juice: the water bucket before going to A Polish home remedy says that bed is going to cure all. However, pickle juice is a sure fire way to drinking water throughout the cu re a hangover - good luck with evening helps clean out the sys- that one.

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Sand: The Irish must be experts on alcohol, seeing as how they've created so many excellent beers and whiskies (Guinness, anyone?).

There must be something to their hangover cure. Their suggestion is to bury yourself, up to your neck, in moist river sand.

Lemon in thearmpits: It's sworn

by In some Central American countries. Take a slice of lemon before you start drinking, and rub it in your armpits. l'm unsure about whether this could count as deodorant for the night as well.

Gatorade: Grab a bottle of that blue stuff, because to help beat the ache, you need to replenish those electrolytes.

Drinking some of this stuff in the morning isn't such a bad idea either; it will help rehydratl;)your body.

Coffee: Many alcoholics the world over swear that after a night of drinking, all you need the next morning is a cup of coffee.

Another option is to bury your head under your pillow, and hope when you wake up again you feel better. Also, don't forget this simple saying: "Beer before liquor, never sicker. Liquor before beer, you're in the clear."

So enjoy the party, get a little crazy, and try some of these cures the next time you find you're spending lime with your head stuck in a porcelain bowl.

Pickle Ball: A New Game on the Block CAGRI EVCIT CONTRIBUTORball. The dog's name was Pickles, hence the name "pickle ball." ' badminton? Are you o you like The pickle ball court is quite similar also a fan of tennis? Did you ever to a badminton court. To be specific, wonder what would it be like if you put the dimensions of the court are 20 feet them together in one sport? Wonder no by 44 feet. However, what sets pickle more, because the good people in Bain- ball apart from tennis and badminton bridge came up with a sport that does is in the rules: in pickle ball, whoever just that, and called it pickle ball. gets the point keeps the right of serving Let's start with the history of pickle the ball. When the server fails to score ball; it was actually invented quite close a point, the defender gets to serve the to home. The first game was played on ball. an island that is very close to Seattle, The pickle ball can be described as WA. According to Pickleball.com: "The an oversized ping pong ball, with holes original purpose of the game was lo in it. The pickle ball paddle is very simiprovide a sport for the entire family." lar to a ping pong paddle, just bigger.

Why it is called pickle ball? Do you You might wonder how much it actually play with pickled items? No, would cost to play pickle ball on your you don't. It's called pickle ball because driveway. I did some research on the the family that started the game played Internet (Google is your best friend) with their and came up with some numbers: a dog's master pickle ball set will cost you around $200. However, you can find pickle ball tournaments in Abbotsford, at the Abbotsford Recreation Centre. These tournaments are usually open to all levels of players. You can join and play with other players in tournaments for free (because you have the U-Pass, right?). But if you an: bu1:,ywith school, Student Life has organized intra• mural games.

Intramural pickle ball is played Thursdays at 3 p.m. in the north gym on the Abbotsford campus.

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packages will be available until February 11, 2010 at the SUS offices in Abby Cl015 & Chwk Gl33 and at ufvSUS.ca.

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