The Cascade Wednesday, November 2, 2011 Volume 19 Issue 26

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

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www.ufvcascade.ca Ai

EDITORIAL

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

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Caningout the whistleblowers decade. The Cascades played well, THE CASCADE and Guelph put up a fight, but much of the second quarter consisted of both squads standing around while I spent part of last weekend at the the three referees blew sporadically Honda Way men's basketball tournaon their whistles - chirping like ment, admiring a UFV squad that is love-sick cockatoos in the passionranked seventh in Canada according ate throes of fledgling romance. Evto the CIS. Coach Craddock has put ery play, and I mean every play, was a team on the court that can compete stalled by a shrill tweet from one with anybody, and they're obviously of these three individuals in what a faster, hungrie.r squad than in pre- seemed like a desperate bid for atvious years. For the too many of you tention. "I may by overweight and who weren't at one oflast weekend's garbed in a slate-coloured spandex game, know that you missed a real shirt," those whistles said, "but I'm classy piece of basketball. still relevant. Just watch me destroy Well, aside from the rampant lu- all your enjoyment of this game." nacy of the people with the whistles, I admit I'm being a little irratioof course. In all my years watching nal, but even as I reign fiery conand playing ball I don't think I've demnation upon those hapless refs, ever seen a quarter as poorly offici- I don't feel entirely unjustified. I ated as the second ten minutes of our remember one play very clearly: a Friday game against Guelph Uni- beautiful drive by Sheldon Bjoorversity. At least I haven't seen one gard, followed by a textbo·ok layup since Grade 8, when I was involved and graceful landing during which in a vicious court scrum at a Catholic he might possibly have laid a hand private ~chool. "Let them play," I re- upon a helpless Guelphian forward. member that ref saying from around Whistle! his whistle as I got curb-stomped by Bjoorgard stiffens, glancing caua 3001b choir boy, "Let them play!" tiously around himself and obviously But that experience aside, I think wondering what he's done wrong.

Friday was the pinnacle of my of- The Guelph player jumps as well, ficiating frustration from the last hope blossoming on his face. He's

PAULESAU

obviously thinking that Bjoorgard travelled, or pushed off, or said a dirty word, or something, and the basket is about to be recalled. That, or someone committed an off-ball foul, or a banana has been thrown onto the court, or a spectator is having heart palpitations in the bleachers and the paramedics need to clear the gym.

But of course the truth is hardly so extravagant. The foul is on the bemused Mr. Guelph, Bjoorgard goes to the line for the extra point, and nobody outside of that particular referee's skull knows why. It's not damning, all refs make mistakes, yet it's the fifth foul on five plays, and the crowd's mood is ugly. "Just let them play!" I hear yelled from somewhere behind me, and this time I agree.

The funny thing is, deep in my soul, I actually secretly sympathize with Friday's hapless officials.

I worked at a basketball summer camp for middle school kids through parts of July, and one of my duties was that of referee, despite that fact that I coached one of the teams and therefore was inherently biased.

However much I profess fairness in theory, I admit that whenever my

RoomC1027

33844 King Road AbbotsfordBC V2S 7MB 604.854.4529

"Black Mambas" played the hated "All-Stars," I may have been a little less than impartial. Frankly, I think impartiality was beyond my humble skill, as the sheer number of infractions those kids committed was utterly confounding. I often had to choose to call certain fouls and ignore others, an unfortunate hypocritical reality which forces me to admit to the following: I love criticizing referees, yet I am a terrible ref I complain about refs being biased, blind, incompetent, yet give me a whistle and I immediately surpass their ineptitude. I just wrote five paragraphs slamming three individuals I have never met personally, for attempting a j_ob which I am entirely ill-equipped to perform myself. Ultimately, my refereeing is probably the only reason my "Black Mambas" won half their games, which is not only cheating, but also doing so in front of a bunch of impressionable children.

Yet even I wouldn't have been crazy enough to call a foul on Mr. Guelph, some things just cross the line.

Editor-in-Chief esau@ufvcascade.ca Paul Esau Managing Editor nick@ufvcascade.ca Nick Ubels Business Manager ali@ufvcascade.ca Ah Siemens Online Editor michael@ufvcascade.ca Michael Scoular Production Manager sjtewart@uhltascade.ca StewartSeym

Copy&fflor joel@ufvcascade.ca Joel Smart News Editor alex@ufvcascade.ca Alex Watkins

Dear Readers, The Cascade published a review of Jennifer Weiner's novel Then Came You, in the September 28, 2011 edition of the newspaper, as well as on~ line.

Since publishing the piece, we have learned that substantial passages of the review were identical to portions of reviews published by other sources, such as Amazon.com and The Washington Post. -We asked the contributor of the piece for an explanation as to how this occurred, and she responded that, due to a family crisis, she had asked a friend to help her prepare the review - and that

this led to the unattributed copying ted by her. of the material that had appeared in Upon review of work published in other publications.

The Cascade this semester, we disUpon further investigation, we covered a number of articles submitdiscovered that we also published a ted by one of our other contributors review of the film My Sister's Keeper over the past few months included by the same contributor in the Sep- • substantial passages taken from a tember 24, 2009 editi~n in which number of sources without at,tribusubstantial passages were identical tion. These articles were "Cooking to a review published on the website with boobs," from our October 5, Film journal International.

2011; "Fat tax slims wallets," and Because of the concerns arising "Left wings only," from our October from these articles that were submit- 12, 2011 issue; "Sports You've Never ted by this contributor, the board of Heard Of: Elephant Polo," from our the newspaper has decided not to October 19, 2011 issue; and "Changpublish any further material submit- ing gender of politics," and "An apple

a day keeps the doctor away. Really." from our _October 27, 2011 issue.

In this case, the Editorial board has also decided not to publish any further material submitted by this contributor.

In light of these recent events, we will be reviewing our pr_acticesin the coming weeks with the aim of avoiding similar situations in the future.

The Cascade, its editors and staff regret having published this material without having attributed the original sources - and have removed these pieces from the website.

Opinion Editor jack@ufvcascade.ca JDR Brown Arts & Life Editor amy@ufvcascade.ca Amy Van Veen Sports Editor sean@ufvcascade.ca Sean Evans News Writer

grace@ufVcascade.ca Grace Romund Photojournalist Rebecca Groen Staff Writers Karen Aney Des$a Bayrock, Jennifer Colbourne,Joe Johnson, Sasha Moedt, Leanna Pankratz,Alexei Summers

Contributors Lan&Anderson, Balra1Dhillon, Edwyn Edwards, James lnghs Tanya Ruscheinsk1,Tim Ubels Printed By lntemat,onalWebExpress

The Cmcadeis UFV's mitommous swdent It providesa fonanf« UFVstudents to have lh<irjournalism published.It also acts asanakemalivepn,ssfor !heFnL,crValley.The Cascadeis f uadedwith UFV sludm funds. The Cascadeis publishedeveryFridaywith a circulalioo d ISOOandisdistribuledatUFV campuses and ~ Abbol.'Oford.

Chilliwack,and Mis-sion.The Ca1C8dcis a memberof the Canadian UniversityPre!s. a nalionalooopcralivcof 75 universityand rollege newspapersfrom Victoria to St. John's. The Oiscade follows the CUPethicnl policy concemir'!1niatcriolof a prejudiciulor

~.

oppressivenarure.

Submissionsan.-prcfcm:d in electronicformat thr1.1ugh e-mail. Please send submissionsin ".L'<I" or•· .doc"format onl~ Artkks and letter,;1" the editor must be typed.

The Cascade reservesthe right to edit submissions for clarity and length.The Cascadewill not print any anicles tl131contain l':tCISI,sexist,homophot,icor lihcllou, C<"11Cn!.The writer•~name and srudcntnumber must bc •ubmitl,:d with each submission.Letters to tl,eedltor must be und,r 250 worus if intendedfor print. Onl>· one ICUcrto the editor perwrit.:r in any given edition.

Opinions expn,s,ed do not n<eessmil)re&ct that d UFV.Cascudestall'and ccvlective, or associaioo ineml>er,<.

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,' WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011.

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www.ufvcascade.ca

ABBOTSFORD VOTES 2011

BruceBanmancampaignsfor •,he youthof today". you information so that you can make an educated, informed decision as to whether or not you · want to go forward. Do you know what all the risks are? Can you make an informed decision? Currently, I don't think all those questions have been answered. I think we're going to the people too soon. I think it's being rushed. If I had my choice, I would [prefer] . this be an in-house deal. .. that we control every aspect of it. If this thing fails, which I hope it does, I think we need to calmly discuss the options.

balance a chequebook. So everybody is bellying up to the buffet and leaving the bill for those who are coming, and I just think that is inherently unfair. I come from a family that had vision and foresight. My grandfather was what was called Alderman back then, GRACEROMUND for Chilliwack; serving is a part THE CASCADE of what I grew up in. The community that you live in you are supposed to give back to, and what I LocalchiropractorBruce Banman think I bring to the table is a sense has made the decision to attempt to of vision.

Mayoral candidate inspired by the problems of under-

30s

enter into publicofficein the upcoming municipalelection.On a regular day he can befound in his Abbotsford neighbourhoodworking at his home chiropracticpractice,with hisfriendly dog Macy meeting and greeting patientsas they arrive.He has afamily historyof involvementin politics, and is also a UFV alumni. Banman agreedto speak with The Cascade this week, outlining his goals as potential mayorand weighingin on the P3 debate.

Why did you decide to run for mayor?

The reason I decided to run was because of the youth of today.

People under 30 are having a hard time tryin~ to find a job and are robbed of the simple luxuries that 1 was given when 1 was younger, but worse than that, they're going to get stuck with the bills because governments don't know how to

What are your goals in running for mayor?

I would not run if I did not think I could do the job. I understand I am an underdog. The incumbent has an overwhelming advantage over anyone running, but I'm in it to win. I search for common ground most of the time.

I'm watching the world of late becoming more and more polarized - the time for polarization in rhetoric has come to an end. What we need to do is stop beating the drum on the small difference everyone has, and start looking for ways to move forward together as a collective team. We need to look at not what is in the best interest of us today, but also what is in the best interest of the generations in front of us that are coming. What are we leaving behind? For me, I got involved because I want to

leave Abbotsford better tomorrow-if I win-versus what it is today.

The election is going to largely b~ about water. What are your opinions on the proposed P3 project?

Perhaps against some of powers that be currently, I a¥' going to vote po. The reason 11,am_ voting no is because there ha_snot been enough dialogue for me. They

talk about options and they say this is the best option. I would like to hear what the other options are. I'm going to be 80-years,old at the end of this contract if this is the way we proceed. It may be the best option, but it may not. As a chiropractor, I deal every day with informed consent. My job is to tell you, "This is what I think your problem is, this is where I think you need to go, and these are your options." I need to give

What differentiates you from other candidates?

I don't want to run a city. What I want to do is get a team and lead the city. I want a team that has a vision of what are our strengths in Abbotsford and what are our weaknesses. Let's focus on our strengths and expand upon them.

Let's find solutions to our weaknesses. A good leader calmly and clearly sits down and has open dialogue with all people and listens to all people, and helps get input as to what seems to be the same common themes, get[s] a consensus, and then... start[s] moving forward. I also think you need to have a vision. I have the ability to visualize Abbotsford 50 years from now - we need to start planning for that now.

Gerda Peachey runs for mayor to give the public a voice ,

Says council decisions are currently made "behind closed doors" GRACEROMUND THE CASCADE

Gerda Peacheyis a UFV Alumni who has lived in Abbotsfordfor over 30 years, and has a clear interest in municipal politics, having attended numerouscity councilmeetings,public hearings,and City of Abbotsford information open houses. However, last year she lost interest in going to councilmeetings,andhas now decided to run for Abbotsfordmayorin hopes of making some changes.This week, Peachey spoke with The Cascade, explainingher motivationto begin a campaignand what she'd like to accomplishas mayor.

Why run for mayor of Abbotsford?

I lost interest in council meetings because they were such a charade.

It was quite obvious that these people [mayor and city councillors] filed out, [and] sat around the table... [but] it was clear it was all done behind closed doors... We have such a lot of quality people in this city. When I go to public hearings I feel joy... listening to my

fellow citizens and the quality, the thoughtfulness, and the class with which they come to council ... [but] It had already been decided. The public hearing was just a mockery.

I have told Mayor George Peary that he has the potential to be the finest mayor in Canada, but I don't think he is the best mayor, and that's why I'm running.

If elected, what are your plans?

There are many issues that matter a lot to me ... I do not believe that Tradex ... should be used to host a filthy sex show annually. If elected, I will use my one-in-nine voice to oppose that. I find it surprising that in the "Bible belt'' we have Christians on council that seem to sit on their thumbs when that issue comes up. Morals matter. I think morals have enormous implications for here and forever. I'm actively trying to understand... the city's relationship with Tradex.

There are many issues I would like to address. Unfortunately, right now this looming referendum question must dominate everything because it is serious. The city is using $200,000 of our money to push that referendum.

This election is largely going to be about water. What are your opinions on the proposed P3 project?

[The Abbotsford Entertainment and Sports Centre] is a massive debt burden on Abbotsford. We

I

fought it. I went to every meeting about Plan A ... We were given so many smooth assurances. It was a three-pronged question. I voted for the Reach and I voted for the ARC expansion because I could clearly [see] that those were for our community. The AESC was clearly not... Our city employees are the ones who are putting up the Heat signs all around town. Who pays for all that? So now we come to today - now we're on the cusp of something far more serious. Mayor George Peary [is] urging everyone to vote yes for the P3. That is far worse, far worse than anything they have done yet ... P3s have had very serious ramifications iri other cities around the world. I've been poring through the documents.

Abbotsford, for example, will have to pay for the electricity [of the water plant] for 30 years... They're making it sound like "If we don't do this now, we11 have no water".

That's an absolute lie. PPP Canada was conceived in 2007 and we've had water all this time. So nothing prevents us from doing it the way we've always done it, which is that the city hires someone to design and build and then city employees operate it. .. So for Peary to say "If you don't say yes to P3, we're all going to be gasping our throats in 2016 and our cattle will .drop dead on their feet'' is absolutely fraudulent.

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NEWS

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CRFC funding to CIVL Radio for Youth Internship Program in action TANYARUSCHEINSKI and community news editor for CONTRIBUTOR CIVL Radio. "She's brand new,"

CIVL Radio has officially begun including local news content onair, following the hiring and training of intern Tiffany Suderman at the beginning of this semester. The project was made possible due to a $5,883 funding grant awarded to the station in May by the Community Radio Fund of Canada (CRFC), under the organization's Youth Internship Program.

The eight-month program provided CIVL Radio with the funding required to train an intern in everything they needed know about developing and airing radio programming. Once they had grasped the basics, they were to be put in charge of their own programming slot under the watchful eye of Aaron Levy, CIVL's station manager, until their internship expires on April 22, 2012.

Suderman, a second-year Arts student at UFV, applied for the internship in the summer of 2011 and is now currently an intern

Levy said, "which is really exciting." Due to her recent hiring, Suderman had to learn everything from scratch within the twoweek training period. "In the end she's excelled way faster and better than I expected," Levy said.

Once the training period ended mid-way through September, Suderman began developing her own programming and airing in her own time slot during regular CIVL programming. "It's really fun," Suderman said, "but it's [also] re-ally challenging. Some days are re-ally exhausting but I really like it. .. and I haven't stopped learning."

The basis of Suderman' s programming focuses on local news, an area that Levy is very excited to be able to have on the station. According to him, providing the community with local news on a daily basis is "not only something that isn't in the Valley but it is some-thing that we couldn't do without the Community Radio Fund."

The significance of the internship

for CIVL is that the station now has the ability to produce "substantial programming," Levy explained.

"We hope it will be seen as grass-roots programming," he said, "and that we're talking about stories that otherwise won't get discussed."

According to Melissa Kaestner, Executive Director of the CRFC, that is precisely the reason CIVL was awarded the funding. "I think what the committee liked about CIVL's application was that it was local news," Kaestner said. "Be-cause the programming [is] provided by people in the local community it's very locally relevant."

The CRFC Youth Internship Program gives out between 10 and 14 awards per year, which add up to about $80,000 in grants annually.

As Kaestner pointed out, the goal of the funding is not just to train a new intern, but more importantly to start something that will flourish after the internship ends.

"Our funding [eventually] runs out," Kaestner said, "but the impact of the project lasts beyond."

Once April rolls around and the internship ends, Levy said that Suderman's involvement at CIVL will be entirely up to her. "We hope that she11 stick around," he said,

101.7 FM

"because she's d;ing great work right now and she's definitely a bright and really talented person."

Even though she only has two months' radio experience, Suderman is excited for the future. "I definitely want to do stuff with CIVL (after the internship ends]," she said. "I think it's a great thing for our campus to have and it's a re-ally good thing to be involved in."

Suderman' s program is called CIVL Community News Up-date and first airs at 11 a.m., usually at the top of the hour.

-Visit our website at ufvcascade.ca-

imgae: massdistraction

Soaring STIratesforceuniversities to changesexeducation methods Assexually-transmitted infection ratessoaracross thecountry, university campuses-perceived hotbeds ofsexualactivity- arebecoming prime locations tocontract aninfection.

Thehighestratesandincreases ofallSTls are amongpeoplebetween theagesof15and24, andthedemographic's national average for chlamydia andsyphilis hasnearly doubled inthe pasttwentyyears.

Over80percentofreported chlamydia casesare foundinadultslessthan30yearsold,according tothePublic Health Agency ofCanada (PHAC), withthepeakdemographic forbothmenand wome~ being20to24yearsofage.

A2009studyconducted bythePHAC outlined thatforevery100,000 womenaged20to24, about1,900havetestedpositive forchlamydia, while900menreported theinfection.

Thenationalrateis258.5per100,000.

Much likethe PHAC, universities arenowforced backtothedrawing boardtodevise new initiatives toengageandinform students asthe latestresults revealtraditional methods arenot working.

"Certainly therearepostersoutthereandthe oddthingthathappens, butthemessage doesn't seemtobegettingouttherewellenough;said Dr.David Reid, a part-time physician atthe University ofPrince Edward Island StudentHealth Centre.

Prince Edward Island inparticular hasseena 14 percentspikeinchlamydia casesoverthepast fiveyears.

Colin McPhail - CUP Atlantic Bureau Chief

Image: Boyce Duprey

Image:B.R.Q.

Image:CUriouslee

Image: MikeyG. Ottawa

PMforming government Newcyber· attacktargetschemical Economy signals a sluggish rebound UK,U.S. talktoughonwebfreedom NewLibyan at cybertalks firms Atleast48chemical anddefense companies were victims ofa coordinated cyberattacktfiathasbeen tracedto a maninChina, according toa newreportfrom security firmSymantec Corp.

Computers belonging tothesecompanies were infected withmalicious software known as"Poisonlvy; whichwasusedtostealinformation suchasdesign documents, formulas anddetailsonmanufacturing processes, Symantec saidonMonday.

Itdidnotidentify thecompanies, butsaidtheyinclude multiple Fortune }00corporations thatdevelop compounds andadvanced materials, alongwithbusinessesthathelpmanufacture infrastructure forthese industries.

Thebulkoftheinfected machines werebasedintf)e United StatesandUnited Kingdom, Symantec said,addingthatthevictims include 29chemicals companies, someofwhichdeveloped advanced materials usedin military vehicles.

"Thepurpose oftheattacksappears to beindustrial espionage, collecting intellectual property forcompetitiveadvantage;Symantec saidina whitepaperon thecampaign, whichthecompany dubbedthe"Nitro• attacks.

Thecybercampaign ranfromlateJulythrough mid-September andwastracedtoa computer system intheUn~ed Statesthatwasownedbya maninhis 20sinHebei province innorthern-China, according to Symantec.

Researchers gavethemanthepseudonym •covert • Grove• based ona literaltranslation ofhisname.

Reuters

Canada's economy gained momentum forathird Britain andtheUnited Statesstrongly. rejected andRussia forgreaterInternet straight monthinAugust, growing 0.3percent from callsfromChina controls onTuesday ata majorconference onthe Julyandputting torestfearsofarecession, but notshowing enough strength totrigger interest futureofcyberspace, although Western statestoo facedaccusations ofdoublestanda rds. ratehikes.

Western statesworryaboutintellectual Oilandgasextraction spurred mostofthebetter- While property theftandhacking, authoritarian governthan-expected growth andtheoverall energy sector expanded atitsfastest dipineightmonths, mentsarealarmed attheroletheInternet and according toaStatistics Canada report onMonday. socialmediaplayed intheprotests thatsweptthe "Today's dataimplies stronger third-quarter growth Arabworldthisyear. thanthe2percent thattheBankofCanada had InSeptember, China, Russia, Tajikistan and assumed initsmostrecent Monetary Policy Report," Uzbekistan proposed totheUnited Nations a including theprinciple saidPaulFerley, assistant chiefeconomist at Royal globalcodeofconduct that"policy authority forInternet-related public Bank ofCanada. issuesisthesovereign rightofstates."

"Even ifstronger thanexpected growth wereto Cyber security expertssaywestern Nations hoped prevail during thesecond halfofthisyear,itisnot tofendoffthosecallsfora"cyber treaty•andto expected toprompt theBank ofCanada tostart China, Russia andotherstoreininhackwithdrawing liquidity fromthesystem asexternal prompt pressures persist," hesaid. ers.Speaking byvideolinkafterU.S.Secretary of Clinton pulledoutofthetwo-day Bank ofCanada Governor Mark Camey suggested StateHillary London meeting forfamily reasons, Vice President lastweekthattemporary factors meanthethirdwasparticularly direct. quarterrebound froma mildcontraction inthesec- JoeBiden ondquarter willbemoreofa"technical rebound" -Whatcitizens doonlineshouldnot,~ssomehave suggested, bedecreed solely bygroupsofgov~rnthanevidence ofatrulystrong economy. decisions forthemsomewhere Economic softness intheUnited States, Canada's mentsmaking ofanycountry toptradepartner, andtheEuropean debtcrisis will onhigh;hesaid."Nocitizen meanunderlying weakness inCanada incoming shouldbesubjecttoa repressive globalcode months andlittlejobcreation, analysts said. whentheysendanemailorposta comment toa Theyshouldnotbeprevented from "Looking forward, weexpect economic momentum newsarticle. theirinnovations withglobalconsumers tosoftenthrough thefallandwintermonths,• said sharing Diana Petrarnala, economist atTDEconomics. simply because theyliveacross a national frontier.

Thatisnothowtheinternetshould everworkin ourview."

Reuters 0

Reuters

Abdurrahim El-Keib, pitched fromacademic obscurity toheadLibya's newgovernment, setabout selecting hiscabinet onTuesday, hoping torally thedisparate groups which toppledMuammar Gaddafi behinda democratic peace.

Afterdecades asa dissident inexile,working asa professor ofelectrical engineering, Keib's family background inTripoli andhislongspellsliving in boththeUnited StatesandtheGulfwerestillbeingporedoverbyanalysts forcluesto hissurprise election bytheinterim rulingcouncil.

Somesawhislinkstothecapitaloffering a balance totheholdontheNational Transitional Council (NTC) byeasternLibyans fromBenghazi, theseatoftheuprising.

Historic regional rivalries arepartofa matrix ofdivisions amongthesix million Libyans whichhavebeeninflamed by months ofwar.

Hislackofpastservice underGaddafi, incontrast to NTC chairman Mustafa Abdel Jalilandothers, andhispresence inLibya duringmostofthis year'sfighting, incontrast totheoutgoing wartime primeminister Mahmoud Jibril, mayalso boosthislegitimacy asthegovernment triesto organize elections.

Keib waselectedwith26votesfromthe51-mernberNTC onMonday inTripoli, takingoverfrom Jibril, whohadpromised toresignoncethekilling ofGaddafi andfalloffinalbastions ofsupport allowed lastweek'sdeclaration of"liberation."

Reuters

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UFVHalloweenfestlvltl• offer''protectionaplnst zombl•'' REBECCAGROEN kin seeds.

THE CASCADE "Just call me Peter Pumpkin Head," said programmer for Student Life Martin Kelly, surrounded by gourds of all shapes, sizes, and faces at U-House where UFV's annual pumpkin carving contest took place between October 26 and 28.

"Why do this? Because it's fun!"

Kelly exclaimed. "If you think you're too cool for something like this, that's hqgwash!" Though in past years attendance has been lacking, Kelly made sure to note that the contest is always open to all students. And there are perks to participation: prizes and bragging rights all year for the carver of the winning pumpkin - as well as access to freshly baked pump-

Other Halloween festivities at UFV included a campus-wide trick-or-treating event which took place on October 31. "Because," as Kelly noted, "the only protection against zombies is candy and UNICEF donations." Students were invited to head to U-House that day in their best costumes to join in the fun. And last but not least was the fifth Annual Pumpkin Chuck on November 1, where pumpkins were disposed of in a stress-relieving operation.

"We're trying to promote a vibrant campus community," said Kelly. "Student Life should be the nexus for different cultural interests, and cultural events like Diwali, Ramadan, Thanksgiving, and Hallowe'en should be enjoyed by all students."

Finesseyour slt'esswith studentsuccessbootcamps DESSA BAYROCK so that students could learn in a THE CASCADE group atmosphere. The UFV verIf there's one thing students are well-acquainted with, it's stress; juggling work, exams, studying, sleeping, and maintaining at least some kind of a social life is enough to make anyone dizzy and a little bit freaked-out. It's something, however, that students are expected to deal with on a daily basis, a fact that UFV is well aware of.

Julie Egers, a counsellor on the Chilliwack campus, said that, unsurprisingly, "students identify anxiety as probably the number one barrier to their success," noting that it is one of the top things she sees students asking for help with during counselling appointments. Egers is new to UFV, having arrived this past August, and works full-time on the Chilliwack campus. At the two other universities she worked for in Calgary, she found that one of the best ways to "offer general support" to students was to hold sessions

sion of these workshops takes the form of a "Student Success Bootcamp" series, offered by Egers on the Chilliwack campus.

"When you do group workshops," Egers explained, "there's really the advantage of learning from other people. At the same time, it gives the students a chance to normalize their experience and see that other people are having [the same problems]."

In her workshops, Egers tackles some common issues, which include the big four: stress, exam anxiety, procrastination, and group work.

The sessions are aimed at Chilliwack students in particular, something Egers said is a bit of a challenge due to the fact that the programs offered on the Chilliwack campus (such as Health Sciences) are typically all-day programs, and don't leave a lot of free time for students. It's for this reason that Egers decided on a "lunch and learn" session, where students could drop by

on their lunch breaks. So far the model seems to be working - the sessions have been relatively well-attended, which Egers finds unsurprising. The issues at hand are things she sees students asking for help with all the time.

Of course, she said, students may have other needs in addition to the ones she addressed with her workshops - "These are kind of the hot ones or the big ones, but there are others that may be identified as well." The four issues she covers, however, tend to crop up often enough that they are more than enough to use as a jumpingoff point.

This set of workshops is something Egers plans to offer every year. After all, they aren't the kind of issues to just disappear. Some can be dealt with on an individual basis, as students come in for counselling appoint_ments, but Egers knows there's more to the job than waiting for students to come in for help. "It's about being accessible and having students be able to come in and know the service is there,"

she said, "but ·the second part is being proactive and trying to be out there for students."

For those students interested in attending workshops this semester, "Getting Started: Overcoming Procrastination" is offered November 7 at 11:30 ;i.m. on the Chilliwack campus in C132/135,

and "Succeeding in Group Work" is offered November 14, also at 11:30, on the Chilliwack campus in room D133. Students are also welcome to drop by the counselling centres either in Abbotsford or Chilliwack to book a one-onone appointment with an advisor.

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WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

-All we want Is a global revolution One student's experience with the rise of the Occupy movement LANEANDERSON CONTRIBUTOR

In a sea of makeshift placards held above the heads of their authors, one particular message etched a lasting impression in my mind as I waded through the crowd at Occupy Vancouver: "If you're not outraged, you're not paying attention!" It is with this notion that I want to share what I've learned about the Occupy movement - an issue that didn't end with the initial protests but rather grows, strengthens, transforms and perseveres.

Since September 17, Wall Street has been the setting for a gathering of frustrated Americans, voicing their outrage about economic, ecological and social injustices. On October 15, the rest of the world joined in, flooding each city's public venue of choice to express mass discontentment.

Many thousands of citizens continue to occupy hundreds of cities globally.

Traditional media outlets have struggled with their coverage of the movement. Initially, they ignored what was happening completely; but as alternative, digital forms of media began to spread the word, newspapers and television broadcasters became obliged to make mention of the quickly growing campaign. However, . the traditional requirements for media-to compress all events and issues into brief summariescannot properly address such a multifaceted demonstration. In abandonment of the examination required to properly dissect and accurately report on the Occupy movement, many newspapers and TV personalities sum up the issue by accusing it of ambiguity and lacking focus, instead. First-

"...I immediately noticed tflat the demographic of tlie occupiers was more diverse than I had expected.

There were many greyhaired elders,· middle-aged professionals young famdies, and, of course, the 20-somethings the movement has been identified with." hand experience with the demonstration, however, makes these claims seem impetuous - and the movement does indeed have relevance and legitimacy.

I first attended Vancouver's demonstration on the day it began. As I approached the crowd on the lawn of Vancouver Art Gallery, I immediately noticed that the demographic of the occupiers was more diverse than I had expected. There were many grey-haired elders, middle-aged professionals, young families, and, of course, the 20-somethings the movement has been identified with. The face that has been attached to Occupy since it began has been ·that of an out-of-work,

student loan-laden, desperate youth; it is comforting to 1~pow that the outrage touches l:'hose beyond a single demographic. A scan over the crowd made it clear ·that this is the people's movement, not the young people's movement.

Walking through the gathering, I was struck by the incredibly joyful atmosphere. Wide smiles were found on many faces between the bobbing signs; hulahoopers played on the barricaded street; strangers acknowledged one another in a way never seen on this intersection of Howe and Georgia. A smaller crowd happily danced to a group of drummers pounding out a mesmeriz-

ing beat - even the police officers watched with content amusement from the perimeter. The sense of community that had been established in those first few hours was profound.

It must be noted that the event wasn't one to be witnessed; it was to be participated in. The voice of every attendant was equally valued. As a speaker took the microphone, a simple system of hand gestures allowed every person in the crowd the opportunity to show their approval or disapproval, to ask a question, or to respond. The process was respected, and a collective discourse took place throughout the day, discussing a variety of injustices and possibilities for change. Through this dialogue, citizens were given a method of constructively sharing their opinions. A large-scale, productive public forum sprung up overnight - a vital component of effective democracy.

I happened to see a familiar face, UFV English professor Trevor Carolan, stopping to read the many messages adorning the sign-making station. I caught _up,wjth him later in his office at UFV to ask him to respond to the question that's been asked since the movement began: what do the "occupiers" want?

"What they're wanting is social justice," he explained. "They want an end to social and political segregation... [and] they're looking for a form of sustainable living that's founded on sustainable economic order." He added that there will, of course, be regional differences.

Carolan clarified that the movement is "still a conversation - a communal conversation ...

[and] the challenge is going to be whether the beginnings of this movement morph into something larger and more collective."

"At last, it's the rise of participatory democracy," he added. We certainly hope so.

As I took a seat on a bench just beyond the perimeter to load a fresh roll of film into my camera, I overheard a nearby elderly man blurt to his companion as they watched the emotionally-charged mass of demonstrators: "They don't know how good they've got ft." This struck a chord with me, because it was an outlook I had struggled with myself as the movement initially gained momentum. After all, the motto "We are the 99 per cent" means one thing when referring to Canada, the United States, or North America - but when we consider society on a global scale, some attendants of Occupy Vancouver are more likely in or at least nearing the 1 per cent bracket. This causes us to ask whether we, the wealthier portion of the world's population, are in any position to protest our circumstances.

My internal debate was settled once I attended the event and noticed that the demands adorning signs on sticks and the conversation amongst provoked citizens are not founded in self-interest.

In most cases, they are not asking for mote privileges for themselves, but are intervening on behalf of those less fortunate. The conversation, and ~the demands that will arise from it, are ones for the collective benefit of our world, not just to serve the personal wishes of the occupiers.

One sign displayed the message "We! Not me!" - a common sentiment. The smiles indicated that this crowd does know how good they've got it, but they are conscious that there are many who don't enjoy the same privileges, and that there is ample room for _improvement in their own circumstances as well.

The voice.of reason: Advice fron1the Student~tion forPhilosophical (SAPC)servhlgthe studentsof UFV DearSAPC, I'm feeling overwhelmed with school;I have something due every week until the semesterpretty much ends, not to mention midterms and keeping up with readingsfor each class. I'm starting to think that I'm not cut out for this student thing. I procrastinateto avoid feeling overwhelmed, but that just makes me even moreoverwhelmedand stressed later.I just want to dropout... this is toomuch.

Sincerely, PanickedStudent Dear Panicked Student, Join the club - this is a common concern among all of us this time of year! It's very natural to feel overwhelmed, especially if you are just beginning your university career. Here are a few things

that will help alleviate this overwhelming feeling you speak of:

First things first - breathe!

We compromise the quality of our work when we rush and do things in panic, so whenever possible, take the time to breathe and calm your nerves, This isn't to say that every time you feel stressed, stop doing whatever is stressing you out - this means approach it 'differently and take your time. If you know something is going to take you longer, allot more time for it.

Organize your tasks and time Get a month-view calendar and write in all the assignments, midterms, projects that are due.

Also add in anything else that will take your time (work, family events, etc.) so that you're not tricking your mind into thinking you have more time than you ac-

tually do - this prevents you from being blindsided. Spend the time now to save stress later!

Pick a motivator/treat yourself!

Instant gratification works wonders; we see it all the time.

For example, as you mentioned, the instant gratification of not having to do the paper/reading/ studying/etc. is essentially what leads to procrastination. Pick a motivator that will give you more reason to get whatever needs to be done, done. Tell yourself that you can go out with your friends this weekend, but only if you finish the paper first. Then tell your friends and hold each other accountable!

Use your resources Form study groups - not only does it facilitate the sharing of information, but it forces us to

do it. Ask for help, not only from othe't students, but teachers - office hours are there for a reason.

Many teachers offer to proofread rough drafts of papers (as long as it's not the night before its due).

There's also the writing and math centre and private tutors available if that's what you prefer.

Start small We're not saying start writing your term paper on day one of class; let's be realistic. Starting small means breaking things down into more manageable, less overwhelming pieces. Divide the paper and semester into chunks.

For example: "By week three, I will have decided on a topic and started research."

While all of the above is information an academic advisor or teacher can provide you, what sets philosophical counselling

apart is that we ask YOU the questions to facilitate your own thought processes.

Why are you doing it? What is your driving force? The beliefs and values you are working from and assumptions you are making to pursue this goal? The questions we ask ourselves and how we frame them are of particular importance. Rather than asking "Why can't I do this?" ask, "What can I do to do this?" Remember why you're doing it, and figuring out how won't be as difficult anymore.

We hope this helps! Feel free to contact us if you. have any other questions or concerns.

Students are invited to request advice from the SAPC by emailing alex@ufvcascade.ca

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WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2 , 2011

Banish common sense J.D.R.BROWN THE CASCADE There is, everywhere in our public discourse, a nasty habit used by nearly all participants. It is something which does not exist and thus ought not to carry any persuasive power whatsoever, but nevertheless can and has been invoked to win the day. I am speaking of the scourge of "common sense," that most contemptible thing that is used by writers and orators both great and terrible with varying levels of success. It is something that ought to be banished from our discourse forever.

Some of my past columns have generated a good deal of reader response in the form of letters to the editor, something that the newspaper has been rather pleased about. I am, of course, also very interested in promoting more discussion on campus and see the paper as an ideal vehicle for that. My recent preemptive response to an opinion piece about abortion "Yes, we all want to kill babies" has continued to generat~ letters from readers, all of whom happen to disagree with my view. Encountering those who disagree with me is by no means disagreeable, but the entire experience has sharpened my distaste for the "common sense" defence.

Some of these letters appealed, implicitly or otherwise, to notions of common sense as a part of their respective arguments and attempted refutations of my position. What is so unique and troubling about this particular argumentative manoeuvre is that it neither presents original evidence nor does it generate logically-persuasive connection between the propositions of an argument. That is, nothing new is said by appealing to common sense; nor are any new relationships between what has

already been presented made apparent.

On that basis alone we ought to object to any use of "common sense" whatsoever.

Leaving that aside for the moment, allow me to ask the obvious: what is common sense and why should we ever heed its so-called insights? From reading not just this newspaper's recent letters to the editor, but those of the province's major dailies, it appears as if common sense means we ought to enact a legislative ban. on abortion, adopt widespread minimum sentences, cut taxes on businesses and capital, and slash government spending and thus involvement in things like education, medical care and income assistance. All of which is not just reactionary and ill-conceived, but it all sounds suspiciously like the public policy advanced by conservative parties in the Western world since the 1980s.

(Mike Harris says hello.)

Now it may be the case that the common sense so often invoked by many is not, in fact, partisan; or, at least, not .,,.,. as partisan as it may otherwise be. But I am still left wondering why exactly I should follow a course of action or agree with a position that a large number of people endorse for no other reason than that a large number of people endorse it.

I haven't yet come across someone who has been able to adequately answer this question in the affirmative, although I am familiar with a rather large body of scholarly material that says the opposite.

Bad arguments, whatever their purpose or direction, are truly the bane of a robust civil discourse. Ridding ourselves of the "common sense" defence is just one measure that will improve things, and ought to be vigorously embraced. And when you do, your letters might just improve a bit too.

Callingfor Teaching Excellence Award Nominations.

Chris Bertram:

Recipientof the 2011UFV TeachingExcellenceAward.

Once again UFVwill provide an award to an individual in recognition of teaching excellence. ·Those eligible for nomination include all UFVfaculty and lab instructors who have completed two years of instruction or sessional instructors who have completed the equivalent time.

Nominations will be accepted from faculty, students, alumni, and staff.

Selection criteria includes mentorship, attention to student learning in the instructional environment and in coursework, respect for students, exemplary scholarship and professionalism.

Nomination packages are available at the offices of the Deans, Faculty Services, and Student Services.

Packages can be downloaded from www.ufv.ca/tea.

For more information, contact LisaTassone at 604-504-7441 ext 5114 or lisa.tassone@)Ufv.ca.

UNIVE~

OF111EFRASER VALLEY Deadline for nominations is January 13, 2012.

A short introduction to death cults: Stop hating Santa Muerte imagery around DESSABAYROCKsome somewhere - It's made recent ap-

THE CASCADE

pearances in both Breaking Bad and

hipsterjewelry. Tattoo art is another Death cults. I know - It sounds creepy right off the bat, but, chums, fm here to tell you to stop hating.

Sure, the skulls and skeletons and offerings of candles and honey are creepy- but even death cults need love and acceptance.

The death cult I'm talking about in particular is that of Santa Muerte, which literally translates to Saint Death. As a cult, it's based largely in Mexico and is a mix of Catholicism and ancient Aztec beliefs.

Yes, Aztecs ru;ethe ones that died out because they kept ritualistically slaughtering each other. Don't worry: Santa Muerte tends to shy away from the whole human sacrifice deal - the farthest they really go is to light candles in front of images of the grim reaper.

In fact, you've probably seen

huge area where Santa Muerte imagery is popping up -you've probably seen the style of pinup girls with Aztec--esque facial tattoos and oddly-skeletal features. Especially in today's zombie-friendly cultural climate, creepy is hardly a new thing. Yes, dressing a skeleton in a robe and lighting candles around it does seem kind of weird - but transforming crackers into the body of Christ and eating them is a pretty odd past-time as well.

People basically start hating on death cults when gangs get involved. Authorities have found shrines to Santa Meurtos in a lot of condemning spots- the house of a gang leader running a sex circle, for instance, or in houses where kidnapping victims have been held.

A shrine was even found in the side branch of a 300-metre-long, well-

constructed, well-lit, well-ventilated tunnel used by gangs to run narcotics under the US/Mexico border.

The image of Saint Death in a robe is alsoknown as "the Virgin of the Incarcerated," and many Mexican criminals either carry charms or have images of Santa Muerte tattooed on them somewhere.

These are hardly encouraging connections, but it doesn't necessarily mean that Santa Muerte is bad as a whole. People corrupt religion like this all the time: priests abuse choir boys, Christian and Mormon extremists set up colonies and claim prophet status, Muslim extremists distort the Koran into something they believe justifies terrorism. This isn't any different A few give many a bad name.

The Mexican government, however, sees too much of a correlation between gang activity and Santa Muerte to believe they aren't connected. Crackdowns on gatherings and shut-downs of shrines are fairly

commonplace. No matter what, followers keep coming back. Many are housewives or youth, who leave offerings of candy, honey, candles or flowers in return for favours of love, healing or luck. It's not scary. It's not creepy. It is a perfectly normal religion that happens to revolve around a skeleton. The followers of Santa Muerte simply see death as an ultimate leveller, and think maybe by praying to it while they're alive, they can get a little bit of that justice now.

Criminals appeal.to Santa Muerte because she, theoretically, doesn't see things in terms of right and wrong, but rather on more of a cosmic scale. In the ultimate scheme of things, do Roadie, Juan and Jorge deserve the profit this drug deal will give them, or should their 300-metre tunnel gig be crashed by the DEA? They can't appeal to traditional gods or saints, because, as criminals, they know they'll be automatically turned down. Santa Muerte is a little

less interested in the details. Her followers know they'll get what they deserve, if not what they pray for.

Besides, if you want to talk about a gang idol serving as a terrible example to the Mexican people, turn to Jesus Malverde, the Robin Hood of Mexican folk saints. Not only does he also merit a mention in Breaking Bad, but he has a pimping moustache. Not only is he is the patron saint of bandits, robbers and drug runners, but he looks like he can hold his own.

It comes down to the idea that people-especially desperate people-will pray to anyone they think will listen, and try anything they think will work. Even if it seems kind of odd to pray to a skeleton, some people seem to find comfort and solace in it, and sometimes they get the miracles they ask for. At the end of the day, hating on death cults is religious persecution - and when has that ever been okay?

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WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

Streetcars: Are they the answer?

JOEJOHNSON THE CASCADE Does anybody desire a streetcar, or is it only a streetcar named desire? A good question to begin with, given our recent exposure to them during the 2010Olympics. But these things are great. They're green, efficient, quiet, and contemporary - a perfect match for the big city.

The kind used in Vancouver during the Olympics are of the electric variety. Operating as the Olympic Line on the city's unused historical track, they were brought in for a trial run during the 17-day period, as a loan from the city of Brussels.

Built by Bombardier and able to reach speeds of 70-100 km/h, they exhibit a design that showcases a modern day means of transportation. Large windows line the walls, the interior is strikingly elegant, and the ride is smooth. They also capacity to transfer passengers for sit close to ground leve~ making longer distance commutes, and the it as simple as possible to board. streetcars take over in a more localThey're much like a cross between iz.ed fashion within the city. And a classic train and the electric buses should Vancouver actually decide that travel the streets of Vancouver. to eliminate the viaducts, making These are the type of streetcars that it more difficult to get a car intoI would love to see become a reality. and.:Out-of the city, Science World Of course, there already is an would be a great commuter hub. ~lished Skytrain system. But Here, those traveling by car and the two would co-exist in a sym- Skytrain would be able to transfer biotic relationship, as they did for to the streetcar to finish their trip. the Olympics. The Skytrain has its And sure, they could currently

Greater Toronto and as being in Brussels, Toronto and Hamilton Area's Seattle, they're also in Portland, San transport authority Francisco, New Orleans, London, has recently signed Rome and Hong Kong, among others. a deal for 204 streetBut what would certainly be nice cars, similar to the is the possibility of having a streetones that were on tri- car that stretches from Vancouver al here, for $8.51-mil- all the way out to the UFV Abbotslion. And a study by ford campus, or even the Chilli.wack the Seattle Transit campus for that matter. It could be Blog had estimated called the University Valley Line their operating cost and service the community as well to be $187 P,er hour. as students. UFV is a commuter However, the school and having an option other upside is that these than driving would give students a streetcars are com- more reliable route to class, as well pletely electrical as a transfer along the major corridor which allows for to other universities. Further, many savings on fuel. As of the cars that are in Abbotsford for covering the are there as it's a bedroom commucosts, that would nity for the Vancouver region. An be incorporated in alternate option would then posthe fare price, or sibly take a lot of those cars off of take the bus, but streetcars are subsidiz.ed in some the highway and ease congestion. a much more attractive option. way. But given that more commut- There's an unused qill line that runs Vancouver, after all, is engineer- ers would be abandoning their cars from Abbotsford to Surrey, so why ing itself into a 'green' urban cen- in favour of the system, it would not retrofit that for a streetcar? That tre and those overhead electrical result in a greater economy of might not be the most economical wires on which the buses travel scale. And that scale would be fur- option, but it would be something don't always go where they need to. thered enhanced as drivers feel the to service a growing community.

F.stablishing a streetcar infrapinch from both the rising carbon H we're after a 'greener' restructure isn't cheap, though. Begin- tax, and the additional gas tax for gion, then our politicians should ning with the one-time expenses of TransLlnk's Evergreen expansion. · be taking a serious look at streetlaying the track and purchasing the With all the benefits that the cars as a viable option. And with cars, the operational and mainte- streetcars bring, they're becoming a civic elections heating up, this is nance costs would be ongoing. The very true option many cities. As well a great issue to be jumping on.

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NAv'E:LGAZ1NG

Nonee

WEDNESDAY,NOVEMBER 2 , 2011

www.ufvcascade.ca

OPINION

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Wikileaks near bankruptcy due to financial stranglehold JOEJOHNSON THE CASCADE Love them for their brazen exposing of truth or despise them for their lack of discretion, WikiLeaks is a pinnacle of free speech.

Last month marked the non-profit organization's five year anniversary.

But if their current financial situation persists, it may also prove to be the last. WikiLeaks's reputation has been built on its blatant disregard for publishing government and corporate information. And while this has raised it to worldwide prominence, it has also created many powerful enemies.

Although there had been contempt flying around since its inception, it was when 251,287 unredacted US diplomatic cables were released that the issues began to get serious.

No government worldwide was safe from having their secrets and names exposed. Take that with documents on big business, such as the devastating information on Bank of America that is supposedly out there, and you get the picture that those enemies might align.

And align they did. Deemed a "financial blockade," companies that had been facilitating the donations on which WikiLeaksdepends have put on the monetary stranglehold.

Visa, MasterCard, PayPal, Western

even if the courts ends up deciding that this is not in fact an illegal antitrust action, it is at least abhorrently unethical.

Union and Bank of America are all part of the systematic plan to force the wiki into silence. On December 7, 2010, these financial institutions stopped processing any money directed to WikiLeaks. As a result, . their revenue streams have shrivelled to a miniscule five per cent of their previous value forcing them to run off of their dwindling cash reserves.

The significance of this is now

coming to bear as they will be near bankruptcy by the end of the year.

Last week ~der Julian Assange gave a press conference in which he stated "In orderTo ensure our future survival, Wi.kiLeaksis now forced to temporarily suspend all publishing operations in order to direct all our resources into fighting the blockade and raising funds." So WikiLeaks is now in the pre-litigation stage in both North America and Europe. But

Omphaloskepsis: I do not like toilet humour JAMESINGLIS opened the door of the porta-potty CONTRIBUTOR he was using and robbed him at gunThat's right; I do not like toilet humour. It is enjoyed mostly by those at the lowest end of the human genetic pool.I suppose that some toilet humour has to be tolerated in the young or immature, but such humour is among the cheapest of -all humour and beneath the dignity of this paper and the sophisticated humour palate of my readers.

Okay, now that the Editor-inOrief has stopped reading. let's get on with what I like to call my annual poopy topic column. Consider these stories rm about to share as totally true until such time as someone goes on the internet and proves me wrong.

Now, I don't wish to laugh at the misfortune of others, but sometimes you just have to. Recently in the lovely town of Richland, Washington, a worker was happily going about his business when he was abruptly taken for a ride in the portable toilet he was using. The potty was picked up and raised 15feet by a forklift driver who didn't realize anyone was inside. Apparently the potty user only went in to do number one, but reports suggest he had a sudden change of intent at around the eight-foot level. The lesson here is always make sure to lock the door and fasten your seatbelt.

I don't know why people using porta-potties seem to have a fear of being locked in, but in another why didn't he use the lock event, a man phoned 9-1-1to report that two men

point of $100. No word on whether the robbers washed their hands.

In the lovely town of West Captain, the local fire department responded to a report of a debris fire at the Deerwood Country Club poolhouse. Investigation ·determined that rather than debris, a porta-potty had burned to the ground. rm sure such a fire warrants investigation, but isn't the more pressing concern what kind of country club uses porta-potties? I can only hope the dues aren't very high. Unsubstantiated reports indicate that attempts to contact the country club president, Jethro Clampett were unsuccessful.

Here's an interesting fact, the most common cause of genital injury in boys is having the seat slam down while they are using the toilet. The second most common is caused by getting sensitive parts caught in your zipper. Okay, now rm not saying it ever happened to me, but let me tell you unzipping is required to get free. rm just saying don't judge me for the tears and if I screamed like a girl it was only because my voice hadn't changed yet.

Now I'm not a handyman myself, but I can appreciate a do-it-your-self effort that is done well. I raise my toilet seat to Paul Stender from the great state of Indiana who invented the "Port-O-Jet''. Now I -don't know why Mr. Stender thought there was a need for a porta-potty equipped with a Boeing twbine engine, but my ad-

miration still stands. Apparently his contraption can reach a speed of 112 km/honabitofgas. Word of warning to spectators, the jet shoots a flame about 15 feet long out of the back.

The town of Williamson, South Carolina, welcomed a new police chief last month. The last police chief was forced to resign when he posted a picture of a porta-potty on his website and captioned it as an example of a ''Mexican Spaceship".

The chief was surprised that his fellow citizens were offended. In a previous posting he listed his ability to speak "sarcasm, Ethiopian Semitic, Afrikaans, and Jive". The now exchief said, '1 thought it was funny."

Speaking of idiots, each year in the United Kingdom over 800,000 cell phones experienced death by toilet.

Now I don't have the figure for Canada or the U.S.,but rm sorry I just don't get why people need to take their phones into the toilet. rve lost count of the number of times the person at the next urinal or stall is carrying on a phone conversation while taking care of business. Now I know this is the age of multitasking, but those are my shoes you just, tinkled on.

A statistician once said "you are more likely to die on the toilet than be eaten by a shark". Now I was previously unaware that statisticians were heavy drug us,. ers, but that investigation will have to wait for another column.

a big deal for these financial service companies to choose who they provide business for, or believe that it's their private company to do at will · with, the bigger issue at hand here is the suppression of knowledge by the powerful, controlling, elite. These are American corporations forcing a website hosted in Sweden out of business, all in an effort to make sure N o w that people don't learn unflattering on the po- truths about the institutions they . litical side support. This is the same issue that is of things, at the core of the Occupy movement; understandcorporate and government interests ably govern- alike furthered by money and greed ments don't at the expense of society. want their WikiLeaks will always be a tarinformation get of attack and rhetoric in an effreely avail- fort to detract and diminish their able. Senator support. And over time this will be Joe Lieber- tried through raising questions such man, in a re- as: Is WikiLeaks journalism, and sponse last therefore should it be bound to jouryear to Am- nalistic standards? Or, is Assange in azon's deci- fact guilty of sex-crimes in Sweden? sion to cease hosting the WikiLeaks What~er you think of Assange or website, had stated "I call on any • WikiLeaks itself, these are merely other company or organization that side issues designed to chip away at is hosting WikiLeaks to immedithe cornerstone of one of the greatest ately terminate its relationship with gifts of freedom we have. them" And yes, obviously the case To put it ever so succinctly, our socan be made that some information ciety is in a world of hurt if we don't can put citizens at risk. Neverthe- have the ability keep the powers that less I am of the staunch belief that be accountable.

WikiLeaks does far more good by keeping those in power accountable.

But if you might ask why it's such

www.ufvcascade.ca

CROSSWORD

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

Random Historical Figures

LEANNAPANKRATZ THE CASCADE

2

5

4

6 7

Answer Key

6. _ the 16th, ma"ied Marie and eventually lost his head (5 letters) 9. Third US president, wrote the Declaration (6 letters, 9 letters) JO._ the First: 16th century queen, a redhead who defeated the Spanish Armada (9 letters)

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9

LAST WEEK'S

\( ROSS

3

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1. Said (or said rwt) to "let them eat cake" (5 letters, JOletters) 2. Famously married eight women in his lifetime (5 letters, 3 letters, 6 letters) 3. Famous French sexual deviant and the first sadist (7 letters, 2 letters, 4 letters) 4. Famous Egyptian queen, seduced Antony and apparently had a penchant for milk baths (9 letters) .

5. German priest who founded the Llttheran church (6 letters, 6 letters) 7. Well-krwwn French emperor, born in Corsica and defeated at Waterloo (8 letters) 8. Mongol emperor _ Khan, responsible for 30 million deaths (7 letters)

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Across 1. Gazebo 5. Baker 6. Busstop 10. Green 11. Mission 12. Stacks 13. Writing 14. Parking

Down 2. Bateman 3. Cafeteria

4. Aftermath 7. Chilliwack 8. Friesen 9. UHouse

The Weekly Horoscope StarSignsfromtheSumasSibyl Aquarius: Jan 20 - Feb 18

Gemini: May 21 - June 21

Libra: Sept 23 - Oct 22

Jack be nimble.Jack be quick.

Watch out for Jack's candlestick.

Someday your prince(ss) will come. Though there's a possibility s/he'll be hit by a bus on the way.

Purple is out, invisible clothes are in.

Pisces: Feb 19 - March 20 The big bang and the creationist theory are both wrong. We're actually living in a giant's hiccup.

Scorpio: Oct 23 - Nov 21 Cancer: June 22 - July 22 Invest in shoe real-estate. Old women are going crazy for it.

When you wish upon a star ... nothing will happen. No dreams for you.

Leo: July 23 - Aug 22

Sagittarius: Nov 22 - Dec 21

It's okay if your siblings are being mean to you. Giant black crows are going to come peck out their eyes if they keep it up.

Don't go up the hill with Jack and Jill. Jack's a falling down drunk, you might get hurt.

Virgo: Aug 23 - Sept 22

Capricorn: Dec 22 - Jan 19

If you see a talking frog, capture it, don't kiss it. There's the next YouTube sensation right there.

Do you know your mom is the muffin man?

Aries: March 21 - April 19 Don't take candy from strangers or their gingerbread houses.

Taurus: April 20 - May 20 Mary may have a little lamb, but its siu won't prevent it from gruesomely murdering you next week.

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WEDNESDAY,NOVEMBER 2, 201 I

Outsidethe Take-OutBox: Maria's Gelato And then we go inside our toasty warm houses and burn up.

What's·wrong with warming up by cooling down? While hot coc:9a and apple cider have their place, the many flavours to be found at Maria's Gelato in Fort Langley tempt all kinds. Fruit flavours? Of AMYVANVEEN course. Ferrero Rocher? Delicious.

THE CASCADE Terrifyingly blue Smurf flavour?

The weather is getting colder, Why not! My favourite, though, rumours of snow drift up from would have to be the Speculaas, south of the border _and the only which is, for any non-Dutch readappropriate dessert choice seems ing, traditionally considered a wintertime cookie made with the cold to be gelato.

Of course this isn't the only ap- weather spices such as nutmeg, propriate dessert choice and many cinnamon, ginger and the like.

Located right beside Cafe Planet will argue that should not be a choice at all after the summer days Java on Glover Road, Maria's Gecome to an end. Gelato should be lato draws customers in with its something slowly enjoyed while giant ice cream figure outside the the sun beats down or walking on door and its array of flavourful a beach or down the pier, they say; colours lining the coolers. With a i! shouldn't be something nibbled sincere smile, I was passed a tiny on while the mercury drops and. bowl of creamy coffee goodness.

There's something about Fort sweaters pile on.

Langley that beckons a simpler To those naysayers, I say, nay!

Gelato is something that can be era. As soon as Glover goes over savoured any time of the year and, the freeway, time seems to get a let's be honest, it's a Vancouver au- little calmer, provided you avoid tumn. Not exactly prairie cold or weekends and Cranberry Festival East Coast snow drifts. We put on time, since this calm vibe is high our scarves, our rain boots and our in demand for the surrounding parkas and enjoy that crisp Jack suburban chaos. It's obvious that Frost as he nibbles at our nose. the Lower Mainland is growing

9180 GloverRoad, Fort Langley, BC 604.881.1193 Prices:up to 15.10 (not including coolerpacks ofgelato) Hours:12 p.m. to 6 p.m. daily.

in population and more and more becoming the outskirts of a big city, but precious little Fort Langley still has its small-town charms (even with the recent riverside development). There's, of course, the antique mall, the knitting store, the confectionary (also known as a candy store), the coffee shops, the bistros, the knick-knack shops, and

TheCascade Cookbook Miriam Nichols' Mushroom and Herb Polenta "Miriam Nichols has been a professorof English at UFV for 17 years. Her bookRadical Affections: Essays on the Poetics of Outside was published by the University of Alabama Press in 2010. Currently, she is working on the biographyof the American-Canadianpoet Robin Blaser,entitled Performing the Real: A Biography of Robin Blaser. In addition to being a highly accomplishedacademic,Miriam Nicholsis also a very talentedgourmet cook- a fact to which many of her researchassistantscan happilyattest."

the toy store with its Radio Flyers parked out front.

Much to the chagrin of shop owners, I admit I am one of the many window-peeking, candlesmelling, blanket-touching browsers who amiably walJ<sin and out of stores enjoying nothing more than the atmosphere. Maria's, though, is the kind of place where

my wallet finds the cash register and my fingers grasp the laughably small spoon.

So be it blueberry or blackberry, Toblerone or coffee, even as the weather turns cold, Maria's Gelato will still be a spot for me with its cramped seating area, tiny cutlery and prime people watching on Fort Langley's main street.

Drinko'theweek: Jager Bomb

"I'm a recipe cook, I have to admit, so in good academic fashion I have to give credit for the following recipe to the author of Plenty, a glorious vegetarian cookbook by Yotam Ottolenghi (San Francisco: Chronicle Books, 2010}. This one is an easy-tomake polenta that seems to me just right for fall weather."

Ingredients (Serves two}: 4 tbsp olive oil 4 cups mixed mushrooms 2 garlic cloves, crushed 1 tbsp chopped tarragon 1 tbsp chopped thyme 1 tbsp truffle oil (optional) salt and pepper 2 1/ 4 cups chicken or vegetable stock 1/ 2 cup instant polenta 3 oz Parmesan cheese grated fine 21/2 tbsp butter 1 tsp chopped rosemary 1 tbsp chopped chervil (optional} 4 oz Taleggio cheese (rind removed}, cut into thin slices For the polenta: . . .

Bring the stock to a boil in a saucepan and add the polenta slowly. Reduce the heat to minimum and cook, stirring constantly. The polenta is ready when it thickens and leaves the sides of the pan. It should look like thick porridge. Instant polenta shouldn't take more than about five minutes; non-instant may take up to 50 minutes.

When the polenta is ready, stir in the Parmesan, butter, rosemary and half the chervil. Grease a shallow, ovenproof baking dish and spread out the polenta in the dish.

For the mushrooms: Heat the olive oil in a large fry-pan over medium and brown the mushrooms. You may have to do this in two batches (use half the olive oil for each batch) if you want the mushrooms to brown and not sog out. When the Jnushrooms are ready, add the garlic, tarragon, thyme, truffle oil and salt-pepper off heat.

Preheat the broiler: Top the polenta with the Taleggio cheese and let it bubble under the broiler. Remove and add the mushroomherb mix. Return to the broiler to warm the mushrooms. Serve hot with a sprinkling of chervil or the garnish of your choice. *I like to mix the mushrooms to include as many varieties as I can find at the market. It isn't that easy to come up ~th chervil and I've left it out with no ill effects. If you do that, you can garnish with the herb of your choice - a little parsley or rosemary, perhaps. The recipe doubles nicely: 4 1/2 cups stock to 1 cup polenta with the rest of the ingredients adjusted accordingly.

Estimated cost: $14-$17

A populardropshot that will makesure that you're bright eyedand bushy-tailedthe whole night long.

Half can Red Bull, or any other energy drink 1.5 oz Jagermeister Fill a shot glass with Jagermeister. Fill a medium-sized glass -w:ithRed Bull, and drop in the shot.

Ideal for: staying awake Bad for: your nervous system / alcohol poisoning On The Cascadescale: B+

12

www.ufvcascade.ca

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

FEATURE

Just a frien.dly game EDWYNEDWARDS CONTRIBUTOR I am seated in 2A, which is inexplicably the first row of a westward bound 747. We left Toronto at 0700 and after a brief stop in Edmonton or Winnipeg (I'm not entirely sure which and honestly, I can't tell those airports apart anyway) the bulky Boeing will touch down in Abbotsford International at roughly 1000, giving me about an hour to get my ass to class.

Looking out of my window I can see rush-hour Toronto. It's terrifying. All 20-sometliing lanes of QEW are just packed with commuters driving in from places like Mississauga and Oakville, all trying to be at their desks, counters and tills on time. The fact that they put up with this tedious journey on a daily basis is depressing in that modern nine-to-five depravity of the individual kind of way, but th~ sizeable pilgrimage also inspires some admiration. Even from this he~ht, I see no definite end to the SJ?_,ntWling·metiopolis.

The sky is a gl6omy grey mixture of morning drizzle and axiomatic Torontonian smog, but in a few minutes the p~e will ascend through the haze into the forever sunny skies that pilots are so familiar with.

This will be a relief because the whole scene is giving me anxiety: the magnitude and chaos of the place is pretty unthinkable.

Toronto sort of considers itself the de facto cultural capital of Canada and, I think, imagines itself as the New York of the North and maybe like an emblematic representation of the best this fine nation has to offer. Right or wrong, in the world of sports, T-Town has a legitimate case, being the only Canadian city with a professional hockey, basketball and baseball team.

Now, I'm not particularly athletically inclined or anything (though I recall making a near-historic sixth grade game-winning kickball play) so naturally, I am drawn to baseball: America's pastime. This interest brought me 4205 miles to see the Blue Jays play their last home series of the 2011 season against the Los Angeles Angels.

I left home yesterday at half past an ungodly hour and drove to YXX,an airport that seems more like a high security Greyhound station and less like an international hub of transportation. A few straggling passengers made their way to the Westjet counter with vague displays of urgency that came off as polite gestures of "I'm sorry, I d~n't want to hold up the plane or anything." Of this bunch, one lady in particular struck me as odd.

She was in her mid-30s with dyed blonde, almost platinum, hair. She wore a grey cardigan that was borderline hip but didn'tlook cool on her. What was odd was that she was not really walking, but had instead mastered a bizarre, authoritative trot and the long brown leather boots she wore made her look like a militant cowboy. It remains unclear whether this affectation was merely a symptom of luggage dragging or an externalized personality quirk. What made her

even more frightening was the fact that her psychotically intense eyes were completely fixed on exactly nothing. They stayed dead ahead and everyone got out of her way. I hoped, like many others in the terminal, that I would not be seated near this woman.

Check in was a breeze and I boarded the plane, found my seat and, just as the sun began to cast a couple of its rays over the Rockies, passed out. One hour later I was scared out of my sleep when the guy behind me, who was about 11 or so and apparently a real big fan of air travel, shouted "Touchdown!" as the wheels smacked the tarmac in Calgary.

Calgary'.s airport is bigger than Abbotsford's, but the landscape that surrounds it-endless prairie like something out of a John Ford film-dwarfs the place. We taxied into the gate and.I started to think about the two hours I had to kill until the-next flight to Toronto. The Domestic Departures wing is awfully dull and so I made my way to the nearest empty line of seats and set up shop with my trusty iPod. There are a handful of these buy-a-last-minute-gift-for-yourkids-here-because-you~forgot-toget-them-a-souvenir-but-promised-you' cl-get-them-a-souvenir shops that litter the building.

They sell anything from knock off watches to perfume to faux First Nations paraphernalia (ex.

Moccasins and dream catchers).

I noticed a Calgary Flames booth called "The Fan Attic." The girl working the booth seemed maybe a bit hung over or at least not in the mood for standard customer service pleasantries, looking more bored than I probably did, but understandably so because the customers weren't exactly champing at the bit for a plastic Jerome Iginla action figure. I wondered how much money a place like "The Fan Attic" could possibly make to justify its location, which must surely be prime knickknack pushing real estate. But so, there she was, in the offseason doldrums, staring longingly at the jewelry boutique that you just know was her first choice when dropping off resumes, but maybe she blew the interview or soro(!thing and got stuck peddling an assortment of sporting apparel, all of which brandishes a fiery C that as a Vancouverite, despite being entirely disinterested in the goings on of the NHL, I have come to consider as garishly flamboyant (sorry) and just a bit stupid as far as logos go. Even in the off-season, this little shop reminded me of hockey's importance and omnipresence. But the fact that these sporting goods worked as a souvenir to kind of sum up a visit to Calgary also seems important.

The boarding call finally came for gate 024 and it was back to traveling. The folks in seats 19D and 19F (who I will call Thatcher and Young Leno due to truly striking resemblances) were less than enthused to find out that yes, 19E would be occupied, effectively eliminating that sense of personal space that would have let

Young Leno and Thatcher ignore each other without seeming rude: The little TVs that are usually cut into the headrest of the seat in front of you were not working and this made keeping to oneself even more impossible. In turn, the three of us were forced to do our little introductions, stating destinations, business or pleasure, and talk about airplane food. Pretty standard stuff, but unpleasant in its compulsory nature. We set off into the big Albertan sky and I noticed two ball diamonds in what I suspected to be a suburban schoolyard. I thought of the 1907 first pitch.

The landscape below the plane was geometrically obedient and brought to mind color swatches that had names like Sandalwood, D.esert Storm or Rio Grande. I guessed that the green crop season was over or something. There were no clouds and the captain informed us of rain in Toronto. This prompted a brief discussion with Young Leno, who was a born and bred Albertan, about the pros and cons of umbrella usage. We concluded they were necessary sometimes.

After finally getting my ~t down on the weird zigzag patterned carpet of Pearson airport, things moved pretty quickly. The pilot had not lied: it was raining.

I found myself without an umbrella; clearly this was one of those "sometimes." Fortunately, the hotel I was staying at is umbilicallyattached to the departures level by this escalator bridge thing that seemed straight out of Kubrick's 2001. I dropped off my bags in my bitchin' Sheraton room, made a cup of coffee, and leafed through a copy of The TonmtoStar. There was an article on the Blue Jays that examined reasons why they weren't going to make the playoffs, but the writing was belligerent and seemed to expect success on the field. This was kind of shocking because here on the West Coast, we're just glad to have a Canadian baseball club with an agreeable logo. I put the paper down and figured I would see for myself what kind of fans these Torontonians were soon enough. I hopped on a bus that took me to a train that took me to a streetcar that took me to another bus. Jesus. I got off the bus a couple of stops too early and had to walk the five blocks to Rogers Centre in the heavy, warm rain.

By this time I was soaked to the bone and eager to get to my seat so I could (a) see the game and (b) get my soggy leather coat off and try to shake my hair dry. Just outside of the stadium I noticed a girl about my age wearing a retro blue-and-white Jay's cap talking to her friend enthusiastically about baseball and the problems with this year's bullpen. She wore a big smile and didn't seem to mind the rain one bit. "This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody)" by the Talking Heads suddenly got stuck in my head. I reached into my jacket and presented my damp ticket to the door guy who pointed me through the doors.

Thank God for the Rogers Centre's retractable roof, which was up and doing a hell of a job if you ask me. I found my spot at row six, seat 10. It seemed pretty absurd to come all this way for a ballgame, but high definition television is no match for the view from 6-10.

The crowd was in a good, laidback mood but the stadium was only about half full. The first pitch is thrown. It's a strike: a nasty fastball that thwacks into the catcli.er's mitt.

New GM Alex Anthopolous, who just seems to love baseball and talks about the team like a kid bragging about his kick-ass baseball card collection, has put together an interesting 2011 Blue Jays team. One of Anthopolous' first moves was to bring in a new manager to replace Cito Gaston.

He found former Red Sox pitching coach, John Farrell. Farrell is the kind guy that reminds you of your friend's cool dad. I think he's a good fit with the organization and figure they'll hang on to him for anotherfew seasons. The '11 squad

that is Farrell's job to manage is decidedly young and, in fact, is the youngest on ~verage in the entire MLB. The management has assembled talented kids like Colby Rasmus, Eric Thames, J.P. Arenciebia, and Langley's own Adam Loewen and Brett Lawrie that all play with real enthusiasm and are just a ton of fun to watch. Basically, they are a group with a bunch of potential but also a great deal of inexperience and this is perhaps what has kept them at around .500 for most the season.

However, the Jays do have some experience on their bench, notably the All Star slugger Jose Bautista and pitching ace, IRicky Romero.

Pitching has been the Achilles' heel for the team this year. The bullpen has been inconsistent and has forced Farrell to bring up guys from the farm team in Las Vegas who just don't seem ready for The Show. This, along with a slew of injuries has hampered any chance to solidify a decent set of closers and set-up men.

WEDNESDAY,

NOVEMBER

2, 2011

13

www.ufvcascade.ca

of baseball But I digress. Dustin McGowan seventh inning stretch. When the was the starting pitcher for the home last out was made, I took a look team and had a pretty strong outing around the stadium and gathered my considering he is still recovering from jacket, which was still pretty damp various shoulder surgeries. He worked and smelled like wet leather. The the first five innings, striking out crowd doesn't take the loss too hard though and were well-mannered eight and allowing zero walks, -keeping the Angels at bay, allowing only in their disappointment. Actually, two runs. But he reached his pitch this happens to be one of the main limit and was replaced by Jesse Litsch. reasons why I love baseball. It's the I've never been much of a Litsch fan. sort of"if they don't win it's a shame"• I think my dislike for the guy is based ethos that I find very attractive and on a few blown games I've seen and, unique in the sport, because while superficially, the way he looks. He's baseball is competitive, it lacks the got this weak, wispy red beard, beady adversarial and physically combative eyes and the physique of a heavy (for the most part} elen:ients of other popular sports. In many ways, it is reader. The game took a turn for the worse. As the Angels scored run after why, I think, Canada deserves to be in run, the Blue Jays sent out pitcher af- · the American League East. Baseball ter pitcher, trying to keep the Halos at echoes some of the better Canadian bay. Perez, Villaneueva, Camp,Jansvalues: it is about being the best that sen, and finally, Beck. It was no good. an individual can be in order to help The final score is 7-2. Eric Thames the group ... or something.

A while later I was standing at a hit a dandy of a home run in the sixth and drilled a line drive at Dan Haren, fairly non-descript bus station, eager the opposing pitcher, in the eighth, to get into that Sweet Sleeper Bed hitting him square in the wrist. So, at the Sheraton (these mattresses you know, that was cool. are obscenely comfortable and are I bought a hot dog and a retro apparently manufactured exclusively blue and white Jay's cap during the for said hotel franchise). My bus

rolled in and I got on. I noticed a young professional man sitting near the front who was wearing an old Roberto Alomar jersey. Feeling more outgoing than usual, which I attribute to fatigue, I asked, "What'd you think of the game?"

"Not much."

"Ah, well. There's always next yea;."

"Hah, that's right." I can't tell if his laugh is hopeful or hopeless. He wore one of those hats that real fans wear.

cities remain quite isolated from one another, with their own respective, nuanced cultures. The Toronto Blue Jays are, in my mind, one of those cultural touchstones that both speak for and unite these fragmented clusters oflights.

September29, 2011

i"am halfway home. I have a ton of reading to do and still have to stay awake through class and so I keep asking the flight attendant for coffee every time she struts down the aisle.

The TVs aren't working on this flight either and I wonder. if maybe I'm on the same exact plane I took yesterday.

Without the televised flight tracking, judging what I'm looking at out the window is tough, but ifl had to, I'd say I'm somewhere over Western Saskatchewan. From the air most of Canada looks abandoned, punctuated by urban areas, mostly one per province: Vancouver, Calgary, Winnipeg, Regina, etc. I submit that these

HTHURSDAY THANG$5/LB

MusicNO COVER from 7pm-12am. ala: House Lager & Ale and a11Scotch

Live DJ all night/ Specials: Hpnotiq, Patron lifvl{, -PatronXO Cafe. Open uQtll1~

ww~.ufvcascade.ca

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WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

101.7 The Q&A: Oh Vi I Iage

FM Yamantaka//Sonic Titan YT//ST

1

City 2Fist Two Thousandand Ten

3

Library Voices Summer of Lust Purity Ring Ungirthed7-Inch

4

MoonKing ThemeForMoon King b/w Old + Dead

S

Blondewich SpecialComboA For ThreePeople

6

Kidstreet XEP

7

Harma White Reptile

8

The Weather Station All of it Was Mine

9

The Balconies Kill Count

1O 11 Rum 12 Agony·

Elit~ Gymnastics

Fleshgod Apocalypse

Ohbijou

13Metal Meets 14Impossible·spaces 15...Of Exile 16 Belong Sandro Perri•

Scythia

The Pains of Being Pure at Heart

LouCanon Lou Canon

17 18Fanaticus . StrangeMercy 19 Fanat~cus

St. Vincent

DAFFYDJONES CHEERS CIVIL NIGHT DJ

Born in Guelph, Ontario and raised in Vancouver, he spent five years in East Van and the other five on a military base. The more relevant years of his life have been spent in Abbotsford.

Dios Trio - "Spoons" People are often wary of songs in the nine minute mark, and rightly so, but Dios Trio does it quite well.

The song opens a friendly riff complete with uplifting harmonics. As the song progressed you are constantly engaged by the shifting meters and ends with a vocal harmony by the band that backs the guitar work.

Krzysztof Penderecki - "The Dream of Jacob" In this song written by the postwar era composer, the track opens with some quiet brass accompanied with what sounds like the whistle of the wind. The relatively dormant beginning shatters when it "drops" with a chorus of dissonance, sharp enough to m~e you feel the terror that Penderecki wanted to convey. All in all, an amazing piece.

Baths - "Lovely Bloodflow" The first thing that I noticed about this song was the magnificent drum programming. The song that follows is melodic accompat¥ffient to the falsetto of Wtll Wiesenfield.

The use of acoustic guitar and piano in a so11gprogrammed on a computer is prefect for the mood Wiesenfield has created.

Earl Sweatshirt - "Eari" If you are the type of person who allows themselves to be offended by lyrics in a song, this might be the wrong artist for you. The over the top content is off-set by the exceptional flow of this, at the time, sixteen year old.

LEANNAPANKRATZmusic?

THE CASCADE Our influences are diverse, and Oh Villageis a self-describedalternative/indie quartet from Abbotsford, BC. Placingsecondin YouthinkMagazine'sBestTeenBandCompetitionin early 2011, the band saw themselves inspiredwith a new energyand commitment to seeingOh Villagesucceed.

That momentum hasn't stopped,and the membersof Oh Villageare constantly developingthemselvesin their musicas theyfocus on recording,writing, and putting themselvesout there.

Plus, they'realsoa groupoffour really coolguys who like nothingbetterthan to kickbackwith someteaand a raring game of ping pong.The Cascade had thefantasticupportunityto speakwith one quarterof the band,Dave Dueckman,abouttheprocessbehindthemusic, and what it's like to be a member of Oh Village.

How did Oh Village come to be?

We played our first show was under the name Ivory Coast two years ago in September of 2009, and we got the opening spot because we knew the guys who were headlining. The show was put on by a bunch of local, young bands and brought out a really good crowd or the debut our music. We were well received and we loved the experience so we kept on going, playing from show to show and having a great time, but never really taking ourselves too seriously. We thoroughly enjoyed what we did but never thought much of it. All that changed when we entered Youthink Magazine's Second Annual Best Teen Band Competition in early 2011. Through that experience we met industry professionals and other awesome young bands who inspired us to focus our energy and get committed to our music. We placed second in the contest out of more than 50 other groups, and we came out with more than $3000 in prizes. It was an awesome experience and it caused us to grow so much. After the contest we changed our name to Oh Village and we changed our members slightly, and although we've grown a lot since we first started, we still love what we do - writing music and performing it live.

What would you say are your primary influences? Do you have any favourite artists or tracks that have found their way into your

each member brings different favourite bands into our musical mix. Groups like Radiohead, Arcade Fire, Fleet Foxes, We are the City, Bon Iver, Hey Rosetta!, Patrick Watson, The National, and Wmtersleep have all influenced either us or our music in ·one way or another.

What has been the most fun or rewarding live experience for you guys?

The final show we played as part of the Youthink Band Contest was fantastic for a variety of reasons for one, it was at a great venue -the Tom Lee Music Hall in downtown Vancouver, and we got to play to a great crowd that was really excited about the show. In addition, the bands we played with were awesome, and that always makes a live experience so much better.

Top three favourite venues?

Top three venues? Probably, in no particular order, the Tom Lee Music Hall on Granville Street in Vancouver, The ACT in Maple Ridge, and the Mt. Lehman Community Fall Fair in Abbotsford.

What's the process like for Oh Village when it comes to writing and recording new music?

For writing, normally one member of the group brings an idea to a practice and we play around with it and try different things to see what we like and what we don't like. It's very collaborative and tons of fun. We love to challenge each other musically and try new ideas that we' re not sure about, and in total the whole process of writing a song takes quite a long time.

Of course, once we think we have an amazing song we'll play it live and then want to change it all over again. It takes a fair bit of work but we all really love it. For recording, we're in the process of recording two songs right now at the Sound Suite in Abbotsford. We've spent a lot of hours in studio working on the two songs, and we're really excited about the quality of the finished product that we're going to have (go to our website www. ohvillage.com for a sneak peek of how recording is going).

The name Oh Village is the product of a few name changes. How

· did the band's currfnt name come to be?

The name Oh Village came from a variety of places and different influences that we've had in our lives. To us, Oh Village speaks about community and honesty and integrity, some ideas that we value as a band. It also has an element of simplicity and clarity, which is almost opposite to today's rushed society and confusing culture.

The name took a long time to come up with, but after weeks or possibly months of debate we arrived at it as a group. As a band we really feel at peace with the name. We are Oh Village.

What do you guys do when you',e not jamming or recording?

When not jamming or recording, we all go to school and work various jobs. In our spare time, me and Scott play ping-pong at Steve's house. We also drink tea, talk about music, and plan what kind of house we're going to buy together as a band once we have enough money. We all go .to the same church and once a month we lead worship together. We also eat at Steve's place a lot. Last time I made quesadillas for the guys. We generally have a good time.

Favourite place in Abbotsford to hang out together?

Hmmm we don't really have a favourite place to hang out as a band.

We often end up at Steve's house!

What's next? Are there any projects in the near future you're looking forward to?

We're hoping to have our recordings finished soon and put those up either on our website www.ohvillage.com or our Facebook www. facebook.com/ oh village so that people can listen to our material.

We have plans of recording more, either an EP or a full album, in the spring of 2012 and we're hoping to put together a tour of western Canada sometime in the summer as well. Along with that we just want to play more shows locally and have our name get out there.

We love playing music and we hope to continue doing so for quite some time.

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

www.ufvcascade.ca

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~ ~-

ARTS & LIFE

AlBUM REVIEW Chris Isaak - Beyondthe Sun KARENANEY

iconic. The first track, "Ring of

THE CASCADE Fire," embodies this fairly succinctly. While the lyrics are the Chris Isaak is a modern repre- same, and the track is produced sentation of the classic rockabilly fairly competently, Isaak's presenAmericana sound. You've prob- tation of the song just doesn't meaably heard him; he's had songs sure up. Though he is a musician in movies such as Blue Velvet and of considerable talent, he spends Wild at Heart. He's also played mi- the track trying-and failing-to nor roles in movies and TV - Si- sound like Cash. Had he simply lence of the Lambs and Friends stand ' tried to sing the song in his own out as prime examples. More re- style, perhaps it would have been cently, though, he's spent his time more successful. on his newest album, a tribute to Though he fails to measure up his influences as a musician. on virtually every track, the very The album title seems to be a worst attempt is quite possibly play on Bobby Darin's ditty "Be- "Great Balls of Fire." The song is yond the Sea." The change to iconic - the name sparks instan"Sun" most likely refers to Sun Re- taneous melodies in the mind of cords, the studio the album was re- anyone who knows it - but Isaak corded at - see what he did there~ just doesn't deliver. He attempts, Clever. Sun Records has played again, to emulate the original arthost to many obscenely talented ist Gerry Lee Lewis), but fails mismusicians, such as Johnny Cash, erably. First, for some reason, the Roy Orbison, and the king himself track was recorded at a slower - Elvis. In Isaak's album, he pays tempo than the original. Perhaps tribute to these greats by recording this is in deference to Isaak's age? new tracks of their hits.

At 55, his vocal chords likely aren't Recording new tracks, however, what they once were. Whatever the is really just a nice way of saying reason, the classic rock piano line that the album in its entirety is falls flat when it's not up to speed.

Isaak madly clinging to the coat- Perhaps the worst aspect of this tails of his predecessors, vainly butchering, though, is the iconic trying to grasp even a small por- hook: while the original and its tion of what made their songs so

u, CD I

'

Surfer Blood Tarot Classics

high yells of "great balls" delights karaoke singers everywhere, Isaak took the weak way out - he simply growls his way up to a lower note, possibly hoping no one will notice that the very best part of the origi-

nal song has just been lost.

The closest attempt at a successful adaptation is probably "Can't Help Falling in Love With You".

Maybe Isaak's version doesn't sound so horrible because this track

Patrick Stump Sou/Punk

Real Estate Days

Postdrag Singles 11-12

There's something brooding about Days,Real Estate's sophomore release, yt:t the album just seems to breeze on by. Effortlessly breaking through the feared sophomore slump, Real Estate have honed their sound, creating a record that is stronger, tighter, and ultimately more mature than their 2009 self-titled release. This time around, the New Jersey trio takes cues not just from 1960s garage rock bands but also from such bands like The GoBetweens, The Feelies and the Flying Nun Records roster of the late 1980s.

The band reinforces their near-irresistible jangle pop sound with a sense of pensive symmetry spilling out of their cyclical guitar riffs. Their use of gorgeous intermingling guitars on "It's Real" and "Younger Than Yesterday" shows the band's overall adoration and understanding of the minimalist pop song. Mellow pop bands tend to veer into detached and lazy song writing; however Real Estate frontman Martin Courtney's spellbinding and emotionally-charged lyrics undeniably reward the listener with memories of summers past and the crispness arriving in the autumn air.

On a quiet fall afternoon as you are busy writing term papers and studying for final exams, you require some audible stimulation to keep you going.

Postdrag's most recent album Singles 11-12 could possibly be just what you need. Postdrag has managed to create a wonderfully laid back sound while maintaining experimental integrity and quality.They have proven that slow, steady,and relaxing music can be more than acoustic solos after being eased into the album with the introductory instrumental track "Basement". Postdrag shows a development of their style in their new album, and if you have enjoyed their music in the past, namely &be! Battle Strike released early this year,you will definitely appreciate Singles 11-12. Although Postdrag's newest album may have been released in June, it may prove to be the perfect album to enjoy as the leaves fall off the trees and people pull their winter coats out of moth balls.

The ephemeral but true-to-form Tarot Patrick Stump is perhaps best known Classicsis Floridian pipeline worship- from his gig as the lead singer from Fall ping Surfer Blood's first new mate- Out Boy, and it was, in part, Stump's rial since their 2010 full-length Astro distinctive voice that lent the (someCoast.Even in the realm of EPs, the what cliche) lyrics a little more depth. main event is fairly short with four Unfortunately, I'm not sure anything original tracks taking up 15 minutes could save his new solo album. He's followed by a string of vaguely un- moved genres from emo-punk to necessary remixes for the deluxe edi- sugar-and-vodka-club-hop, which I'm tion. There is still a strong slacker/ well aware is not a real genre. I'm really college rock vibe, but everything is at a bit of a loss to describe it. Stump a little sharper and cleaner here, the helpfully tried to label it Soul Punk, band deftly employing the benefits of but beware, listener - it is neither of two years of touring experience and these things! Although some songs newfound major label support from may have been salvageable under the Warner Bros. Relationships both ro- right circumstances, the lyrics are iffy mantic and platonic are major themes at best, seeming to centre on "look at throughout, yt:t substance abuse is how drunk I am at this bar" rather once again on the mind of youthful that any real emotional experience. As lead singer John Paul Pitts on "DrinkStump says in the second track, "I'm ing Problem," where the band forges gonna take one more shot / and then bravely ahead towards Animal Col- I'm quitting forever."Yes, dear, maybe lective territory. Elsewhere, the spar- you should. And I'm not just talking ing introduction of synthesizers on about the drinking. the bridge of "Voyager Reprise" is a ,welcome addition to Surfer Blood's sonic toolkit. But the band does well by keeping their immediate,.inventive melodies and towering, fuzzed-out guitar riffs in the fore.

NICKUBELS

has already been ripped off and rerecorded by everyone from Disney pop princesses to stoned princes of reggae. Purists will dislike Isaak's version, simply because it is fairly close to (but not quite as good as) the original. However, while Elvis was an amazing artist, his voice isn't universally appealing. Some may feel that Isaak's inability to replicate Elvis' gentle warble actually improves the track.

While Isaak's album is an assault on the ears of people who love the most classic of classic rock, it has some upsides. Even though his voice doesn't match the seasoned ear's high expectations, the double album does provide listeners with a good compilation of some great songs. Further, there hasn't been any noticeable attempt to modernize the tracks: the main guitar lines of each song come from Isaak's own Gibson guitars, and the engineering process didn't remove any of the twang that has become a hallmark on these classic tracks. While it's not a great example of creative musicianship, and not Isaak's greatest work, if you like the genre it might be worth a listen.

DESSA BAYROCK

TIMUBELS

GRACE ROMUND

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Cascade Arcade

Book Review

Omni-directional treadmills andsimulatedgravrty ·takegamingto new levels JOEL SMART THE CASCADE Imagine the ultimate gaming · simulator. What new aspects would it bring to a game that isn't captured with a standard television and controller? Perhaps it would have more power to excite you. Maybe it would allow your actions to be more accurately portraY.edin the game. As gamers become older and richer, some are beginning to explore these avenues in their quest to create the best possible gaming experience.

Dedicated racing fans now have the option to invest in motionsimulating game chairs that are programmed to automatically tilt forward, backward, and even sideto-side as the car accelerates or decelerates to accurately portray the feelings of G-forces. In order to capture the feeling of being pushed back in your seat by pushing down on the gas pedal, these seats lean way back. Going around a comer?

The seat will tilt to the side to make sure you're really feeling the pull.

Some of them will even react quite violently if you crash or roll your car. In order to sustain the illusion, these setups have high definition television screens attached to them that move along with the seat.

Such driving simulators are expensive, but it's nothing compared to the whopping £500,000 ($650,000)that that Jason Bradbury and Suzi Perry, of the UK television program The Gadget Show, spent creating the ultimate game simulator for first-person-shooter (FPS) Battlefield 3. "The idea for the simulator came in July this year," a press release for the device read, "when The GadgetShow realized that graphically-sophisticated games are held back only by the way many of us play them - sat in front of one static monitor." While spending so much on a glorified controller seems excessive, this state-of-the-art device is so ad-

vanced it actually reinvents the boundaries of interactive media as a whole.

From the outside it looks like a grey ten-person tent. But inside, the Igloo Vision dome is a 360-degree screen four meters high and nine meters wide that can display video in every direction using fiveseparate projectors working in tandem. Impressive, but the next part is what really sets it apart.

At the.center of the dome is an omni-directional treadmill. Picture a pizza cut up into 16-slices, with each slice being its own treadmill.

Players stand on a small platform at the centre of the "pizza" and are free to walk in any direction they choose. Because each slice is composed of a great number of tiny rollers that are constantly spinning back towards the platform, they always end up back on the platform.

With the use of 10 infra-red motion tracking cameras, the motions, directions and speed of the player are all captured and translated onscreen. This ground-breaking tool was designed by MSE Weibull, a Swedish-based company that, according to their website, "specializes in creating the hardware for simulators and other training devices."

It's an innovation that opens the doors to a new generation of virtual reality, especially considering the same cameras can track the movement of a wireless gun peripheral, which can be used to move the camera around the 360-degree

WEDNESDAY,NOVEMBER2, 2011

screen. Because the image only occupies 180-degrees of the screen at a time, this. rotational ability ensures that players can always see the area of the world they're aiming at. The rest of the dome is lit up with an LED lighting display that uses advanced technology to detect the appropriate lighting based on the details in the game, whether it's to light up an outdoor scene, or reflect the grungy feel of a dark corridor. A hacked Xbox360 Kinect camera was also used to detect if a player jumped, crouched, or grabbed a fallen player in-game, adding to the immersion players felt in controlling the game.

As if that wasn't enough, the simulator also packs in 12 paintball guns aimed at the player from various locations around the dome.

Sustain enemy fire and the guns will shoot fhe player,with rulfuer pellets from the exact angle•they were shot at from in the game. It's enough of a punishment to make players think twice before running out into the open.

It's pretty incredible that such technologies even exist, and it is envy-inducing to think that some players are lucky enough to incorporate them into the video games they play. Perhaps, though, that as such technology becomes more common place, the price will go down and similar simulators may become available at the local arcade. At the very least, they provide new fodder for gamer fantasies everywhere.

AlastairReynolds- Troika ANTHONY BIONDI THE CASCADE Troika, a novella by Alastair Reynolds which was released in June, takes place in the bleak near future, at the dusk of scientific progress and the shut down of the space program globally. After a mysterious object known as the Matryoshka appears suddenly in Earth's local solar system, all of humanity struggles to understand' what it is. During its large orbit around the sun, it makes three apparitions. Each appearance brings humanity closer to understanding the object's mystery, yet drives the debate of its origin deeper. On the third apparition, a manned team is sent to investigate the object. The team struggles through stress, fear, and insanity within the closed environment of the shuttle; suffering from something close to cabin fever. The team struggles to g·ather samples of the alien object, while combating their own stresses.

When their unmanned probe becomes stuck, they enter the device, and become changed forever.

The team then has to struggle through goverrup.ent control, as they find that the world fears the power of this device. The government is denying the truth to the people, and burying it in the past.

They are lead through a thrilling narrative of identity, control and the fall of science.

Troikais a steady-pj~ed ~~ence fiction novena, of a similar vein to Michael Crichton's Sphere, and Arthur C. dark's A SpaceOdyssey.

It carries itself with a healthy level of mystery, all the while exploring the prospect of our near future and our humanity. As we come to the age of the closing of the American Space program, the world in Troika seems to be a haunting reflection of our own choices in the world of science.

The novella itself is rather standard of the genre, bringing nothing new to the table as far as twists and turns are concerned. A close reader would be able to predict the ending with some accuracy.

Although, the saving grace of this novel is the way in which it is written. The simplicity of the style and the characters allow the reader to become involved and enraptured in this plausible reality without becoming caught up in the details.

The narration flows smoothly and paces itself in an articulate manner.

Though the science of this novel is still present, it is not a looming hindrance as it can be in other novels of the genre.

Reynolds is a long time author of the science fiction genre. He has a history of astrophysics, thusly making his worlds and his science all the more believable. His narratives have come a long way from being choppy, science-ridden masses, becoming a well-paced mystery. ThSl!.lghTroikastill struggles to build three-dimensional characters and exercise perfect dialogue, Reynold's writing is stij.1 some of the better the genre has to offer.

Although the novel becomes hung up in places, Troika is still a fun and entertaining read that leaves you thinking. Reynold's has proven once again that science fiction has the potential to explore the world around us, as well as our own humanity, and has earned his place along side the science fiction greats.

Publisher: Subterranean Press Price: $60

HauteStuff:Toptwo falltrends LEANNA PANKRATZ The Midiskirt: The fashion world is buttoning THE CASCADE Fall 2011 is a collage of various trends and styles, and it may at times seem difficult to narrow down the cold-weather smorgasbord of emerging looks. However, there are two definite standout trends that have been incorporated into a wide array of collections, and carry the potential to define the spirit of the season. The midiskirt and the usage of leather are style opportunities that can be translated into diverse style moments. One thing, however, is certain: the return to a longer hemline and to the staple wardrobe material, leather, signifies a significant shift taken by the fashion world from a more pubescent, erratic stage into a more grown up and defined phase of women's dressing - always, of course, with room for irreverence and experimentation.

up and dropping the hemlines. In the current spirit of golden age dressing, it seems that the fashion world has done a 180 from the age of the miniskirt, and is now opting for something that accurately reflects the modem woman - self-defined, and secure in her femininity.

While miniskirt-lovers may cringe in fear at tfus sudden shrouding of their legs, it is necessary to stress that the midiskirt can be just a sexy as its shorter counterpart, if not more due to its understated outlining of the wearer and its implications of grown-up confidence.

A midiskirt provides the wearer with a good, classic line and is best worn in a close, slim fit, if the material is more structured, or with a little more room from some "flowiness," if the material is lighter. The midiskirt certainly does carry suggestions of 1940s-era silhouettes, lending it a classic appeal, yet is

modernized by bright colours and unexpected cuts.

Leather: Judging from fall runways, and current street trends, leather ' is back, and is no longer strictly , for the rockers and bikers among us. While leather certainly possesses an edge, and a little bit of hardy power (I mean, what other material can withstand motorcycle crashes in good form?) it can also be carried off as a nice foil to an otherwise soft and decidedly girly outfit, or as an exploitatively hyper-feminine take on prim and proper dressing. The pairing of a floral, spring dress with com- fetis ·stic and somewhat deviant bat boots and a leather jacket has · (Louis Vuitton's Fall/Wmter 2011 been spotted a number of times on collection, for example), producVancouver and Abbotsford streets, ing a smoulderingly dangerous efand is a fabulous example of a fect that reflects, perhaps, our age very current irreverence towards of the liberated female, who has styles and mixing clothing items to gained the ability to dress as domimake a unique look that is all one's nantly as she feels. Leather, on the own. The effect of leather can be other hand, can also be worn as

a classic staple, as demonstrated

by Ralph Lauren's fall 2011 show, with streamlined cuts, and classic shapes that have transcended the decades. Leather is an opportunity waiting to happen, and presents a palate for diverse experimentation.

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ARTS & LIFE

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Discussions Below the Belt Showing skin

Composting fo·rtrendy UFV students

VIOLET HART

SASHAMOEDT It's a hard thing for people to get

THE CASCADE

THE CASCADE into because they're not used to

Human beings are the ·only animals that (willingly) wear clothes.

As I've said in the past, humans have some good reasons to cover their vulnerable genitals. And when humans began to migrate to colder climates, covering more of the body was the logical way to keep the body warm and dry. Then of course religion and culture steps in, we make rules and voila - now clothes have to be worn a certain way, only certain parts can show, etc. etc. · Humanity is obsessed with clothes. In almost every society, clothes reflect things like stah.ts, income, gender, attitude and sexuality. We judge people based on what they are wearing. We worry about what matches, what'~ in style and what suits our bodies. As any fashion srudent knows, clothes occupy a huge role in culrure.

Now, clothing is obviously artificially contrived. It's not as nah.tre intended it. Go back to Eden, the first thing Adam and Eve do after they become self-aware and cut themselves off from narure is put on clothes. That said, I'm not one of those who advocate going back to whatever nah.tre "intended," if such randomized chaos as narure can be said to have an "intention."

I'm a huge fan of blood transfusions, drugs, refrigerators, cell phones, radio, television, internet, hair driers and airplanes ... I don't vote we all go back to living naked in the woods. Besides, that would be cold.

However, it's a little ridiculous how people attack each other over clothes, especially "sexy'' clothes.

Every Halloween everyone is dismayed because the women wear revealing clothing. Ironically, they usually wear far more than they

would, say, on the beach. But the beach, we accept, is somewhere women can wear less clothing because it's hot and it makes it easier to swim; to wear less clothing simply to show off one's sexuality wellt Heaven forbid.

Are glimpses of boob and booty a rum on? Yes,of course. Whatever we hide will always be fetishized.

I don't think that women (or men) who wear sexy clothes are making the point that they want to have the right to, say, dance naked in a club. Precisely the point is to push the limit and reveal enough so that they seem exciting because they are being risque.

Does that mean everyone should wear sexy clothes? Of course not.

Some people don't want to be

perceived as risque and enticing.

Some people dislike being sexually objectified. Some people prefer to be comfortable. Does that mean that society as we know it is going to crumble because some women and men like to show off what they got? Christ, it's just tits and ass.

We've all seen it before. There's no grai;id mystery to nudity.

At the end of the day, does it really matter? Personally, I think we should be more concerned about issues like the Hom of Africa famine or Occupy Wall Street, than the fact the blonde next door wants to wear a superwoman cosrume that shows off her boobies. But then again, I am the sex columnist. I love boobies!

Composting is the new recycling. Everyone is aware of how important recycling is, but the environmental benefits of composting might seem less obvious.

At UFV, a composting program was piloted during the winter 2011 semester. Bins were set up across the campus for student's food waste. Lisa Banks took over Down-to-Earth Compost Pick-up, the company involved in UFV's program. The program is being looked at to start up after the successful trial run. "I'm quite excited, actually," Banks said.

Banks works picking up compost throughout Abbotsford. She does industrial and residential pick-ups: "I have a couple of elementary schools that are on board as well," Banks said, "the whole city hall, I pick-up on each floor, and I do the fire hall, too."

For students living out on their own without a backyard, Downto-Earth offers a composting option and the cost isn't expensive.

"It depends on the size," Banks explained. "ff you have the kitchen counter top one, and that's 1.8 gallons, that's $5.50. Some people have two pick-ups a week; some have it once every two weeks, depending .on your usage."

Because her loads aren't weighed at her drop off point, a gardening company called The Answer Garden Product Ltd, Bank's wasn't entirely certain of how much she picks up in a week.

"Probably three, maybe four hundred pounds in my little van," she said, laughing, "by the time I'm done the wheels are just bulging."

It's a good option; one less thing in the landfill.

"It's just a really healthy way of life, I've always been a recycler ...

thinking about what they throw away," Banks said. 'We have to think about the furore."

I'll admit I knew that there was something environmentallyfriendly about composting, but, frankly, I didn't know what. You'd think that having organic waste in landfills would aid in the breakdown of non-organic waste. Apparently that's not the case. In a landfill, air cannot get to the organic waste, so as the waste breaks down it creates a greenhouse gas: methane. Methane is of course harmful to the atmosphere. On the other hand, when this same waste is composted above ground, oxygen helps the waste to decompose aerobically and hardly any methane is produc~d.

For those who live with a yard out back, by composting, you improve the quality of the soil. You end up with a natural fertilizer that provides a healthy soil with good drainage, soil that can better retain nutrients and moish.tre, and sustain aeration. Compost is a renewable resource; chemical fertilizer is not. By avoiding a chemical fertilizer (derived from petroleum) you are supporting a natural ecosystem.

Plants evolved thriving on the nutrient-rich rot in the soil. By creating a healthy soil, the need for irrigation and watering is reduced.

J'he golden rule for gardening is to keep your soil healthy. I just made that up, being so-not-a-greenthumb that I actually have no thumbs - but it just sounds right.

It's a simple thing, a rotting process, as this raw, organic material decays into rich, black soil.

POP CULTUREESS·AY Down-Lookers,Lo·ud-Chatterers,and Abrupt-Answerers:The cult of the eelI phone ANTHONYBIONDI ing at every moment of every day?

THE CASCADE Being only fingertips away from

our entire social circle has blinded I have seen the world. I have us from the world we live in. . .. With blindness we put ourlooked up. I have existed for years, selves in harms way. The sheer yet I have seen so little. This world around me, I see, is a bleak ex- · convenience of mobile phones has ample of this mooem time. Every- left us remarkably vulnerable. It where I look I see them. They ... can be simply attributed to the fact wander the streets like lost souls, that the afflicted cannot look away. seeing but not seeing, hearing but When the phone rings, it is a calling . not hearing. .. . They take their eyes off what I have seen it.

But then I resume looking down they are doing to look down to at the small portable device in answer the call. It can be resisted. my hands. This "Cellular Phone" However, that ring or vibration ... Now I know. I am not alone in will always taunt their minds. · this plight. All around me they These Feverish-Users may be drivwander: the Down-Lookers, Loud- ing, or walking or doing just about Chatterers, or Abrupt-Answerers. I anything else (hint), yet they will experience them every day, in ev- always heed the call of the cell. In ery facet of my life. They may be many cases this could lead to bodifriends, strangers or loved ones. ly harm. The afflicted need only They walk among us, consuming look down for a second to check . . . personal safety, social interac- a notification, and the next thing tion, and time. I look back to the they know their car is in a ditch, or days of yore, when these devices unpleasantly rammed up the back did not exist. How did we get by? end of another car. Like wise, if What madness would the ... world they were on foot, they could walk fall to, if those lost souls could not ... into holes or poles or other such know what their friends were do- rhyming objects ...

Laws have since been put in place to protect them from themselves, yet I know that they still tempt the devil. It is nigh impossible to resist ...

Humans are social creah.tres, after all. It is understandable that we require contact with our friends and family to fulfill our days. Although, I have seen people: the Social-Ghosts, who haunt the social outing. Friends surround them; yet they insist on talking to people who are not even present ...

This ritualistic activity - degrades their surrounding events to nothing more than a mush of background noise and peripheral nonsense. I have experienced conversations with these people. Let me assure you that statues have been more interesting to talk to.

The afflicted hear what you are saying but the words wisp their way through one ear and silently dissipate out the other. They are too busy reading or chatting, to even process the outward verbal environment. I can only ... put it into these simple terms: "Input overload." So much interaction is

taking place in front them that they blot out the rest. Since they deem the phone the most important part of their. social life, the outside world no longer holds any focus .

To further the ideas of conversation, may I lead you to the thought of conversation itself? I visit friends. I know people. But from time to time, I will find one of those friends who, mid-conversation with me ... will just get up, answer the phone, and walk away. I am left flabbergasted. Is my presence not sufficient enough to engage in conversation with? Perhaps I am just not the type to hold the attention of an individual. Regardless I find this activity baffling. The afflicted appear to have the ability to jump . . . from one conversation to another without the mind to even notice. This symptom I find most severe.

It makes me wonder. How much time do the afflicted spend on their phones anyway? In many cases they have telltale signs of hunching and stiff hands, with a strong potential for arthritis and carpal tunnel. These symptoms are a

dead give away of overuse of cell phones. They sacrifice so much of the living world in order to stare down into a digital screen, waiting, scanning and hoping for a call ... or message. This level of addiction has left them pale and elusive.

The sun may rise and fall without notice, and days vanish without a trace. These people never disappear from their social circles, but can never fully interact with them either.

I have observed the world before me ... I have seen its follies.

Yet, I am among you. Throughout this divulgence of mine, I have taken periodic breaks, marked by a " ... ", each time my phone has gone off and I have looked. I am one of many. A hunchbacked, arthritis-ridden, anti-social socialite. You may find me frequenting malls, hospitals, pubs, restaurants and classrooms. We all share this illness. These are the facts. There is no cure ...

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FilmReviewIn Time MICHAELSCOULAR drama and suspense, Niccol posits THE CASCADE a future where increments of time In his movies, Andrew Niccol has generally shown a good eye for images and the ideas behind them. Showing the healing and harming properties of genetic research in Gattaca and the dark humour mixed with the horror of arms dealing in Lord of War, Niecol has made movies that, while not revolutionary, have attempted to open up a dialogue with an audience about issues not normally portrayed with such a level of understanding in studio pictures.

Where the director Niccol has faltered in those movies, Niccol, the screenwriter, has undercut the intelligence of the sights and sounds on the screen with characters that trade mostly in aphorisms, consistently reverting to the cute phraseology that marks a trained screenwriter, rather than someone with an ear for something an actual person might say. However, the beautiful cinematography of Kieslowski director of photography Slawomir Idziak, the haunting melodies of composer Michael Nyman and the composed, fiery performance of Jude Law in Gattaca, as well as similarly effective turns of Amir M. Mokri, Antonio Pinto, and Nicholas Cage in Lord of War were all able to render the problems of the script as a more minor issue.

In his latest feature In Time,there is no outside talent to save Niccol.

Using the old screenwriter standby of time limits as an easy route into

are literally money. This results in a wealth divide between classes that also kills off the underprivileged once their personal bank accounts (displayed as permanent digital wristwatches) are depleted.

This gets at a current outcry of the impoverished working class versus the healthy, lllZY,bankers at the top, and from the beginning seems to suggest Niccol is again working in a similar vein as his past works, though not with a similar level of intelligence.

Where the perfectly engineered people of Gattacadepjcted a plausible and unnerving future, the people of In Time are played as an unintentional joke, with frequent parody-like introductions to Olivia Wilde as a 50-year-old mother and Vincent Kartheiser showing off three look-alike women as his mother, wife, and daughter. Niecol fails to develop the basic story premise as anything more than an amusing idea, frequently using "time" puns rather than taking the next step further. He could have looked at what this concept could potentially mean, similar to the uncomfortably prescient scene in Gattacawhere a couple chooses what their genetic child will look and live like. After the first half of story and character introductions, In Time is content to show hero Trmberlake drive cars, shoot cops, and run, hoping to beat the lazy tick of the clock. This film shows Niccol at his most compromisingly dumb, taking a science fiction idea

Suburban Swing on Sunday nights ALEXEI C. SUMMERS matter of sticking with it, so you THE CASCADE don't suck so much. Even so, you will still find some people will refuse to come.

Abbotsford Seniors Association, Yet that does not deter the long at 33889 Essendene Avenue on list of regular dan.cers who attend Sunday evenings, you might just week after week, improving their stumble upon one of Abbotsford' s steps a little bit each time. Bryce best kept secrets. I am, of course, Bushe, long time worker at the referring to Suburban Swing, a event, had this to say regarding swing dancing event that occurs the popularity of Suburban Swing, every Sunday night. The evening "I'd say the reason it's so popular is always begins at 7:45 p.m. sharp mostly because of word of mouth. with an hour long instruction It's always been very popular. We from professional dancers, allow- have a lot of the same people reing even the clumsiest oafs in pos- turning week after week." session of two left feet to become Suburban Swing, running since somewhat competent on the dance 2000, is the Canadian West Coast's floor. After the lesson, the rest of largest swing dancing club, and it the evening is spent grooving to is headed by Jason Warner. "It's some jazzy tunes, moving, and been almost 12 years now," said swaying to the rhythm.

Warner. "It's a good time, and peoIf you're a student, entry is just ple seem to enjoy it." $7.25. For everyone else, the fee is The evening lasts until 11 p.m., $8.25, unless one is either visiting which might not seem like a very from Vancouver, or from the Unit- lengthy time just thinking about it, ed States of Eh, in which case the but when you're on the dance floor fee is dropped to a nice low price you'll probably be quite exhausted of $6.25. by the time the clock strikes 11. It is Even still, you might find that quite the workout. people you invite to join you on The tunes played are old jazz, this joyous evening out are re- and blues classics, and beloved faluctant to come. Often times they vorites like Bobby Darin, Elvis Prewill issue forth flimsy excuses that sley, Dean Martin, and of course, wouldn't even fool that Brick Tam- Frank Sinatra. Everyone is sure to land fellow from that Anchorman like something that is played. movie. One can see the fear in their So if you want to have a good eyes, see their palms sweating, al- time in Abbotsford on a Sunday most hear the heart palpitations, night, and aren't sure what to do, · and just generally sense their ap- take my advice: shine up y~ur old prehension, but really there is little dancing shoes, and head down to fear. Anyone can dance. Yes, you to the Seniors Association Hall. might suck more than some· other You're guaranteed to have a splenpeople, but they probably sucked did time. at some point in time too. It's all a

If you amble on down to the

and grinding it into teenage ac- plorable depictions of women in tion/ romance paste.

Niccol' s other works, is a needy, Additionally, In Time does not desperate bystander, dragged evE:n work as a better-than-averacross the city and told to shut up age example of that genre. Niccol in moments of crisis. has not proven hin;iself to be an Justin Trmberlake is James Bond, excellent director of actors. Often Robin Hood and Oyde Barrow the best performances in his mov- or so In Time tries to tell us. The ies come from veterans that can suave introductions, retro convertturn in an effective role regardless ible, gambling talent, and "steal of the director, and here he has a from the rich to feed the poor'' cast of the young and TV-trained ideals position him as this kind of who have shown they can do bet- hero, yet what is this movie actuter with superior guiding hands ally showing? Kartheiser sends a (such as Fincher, Egoyan, Weiner). final monologue JT's way, telling Niccol's script, again, does them him that everyone, despite knowno favours: empty syllables and ing it isn't possible, wants to be half-hearted quips rule the day for immortal. It's a flaw people have the male characters, and Amanda yet can't stop denying, stealing Seyfried, in the tradition of the de- . they rob banks - to try and fill the

insatiable vpid. But Timberlake's character never refutes that, seizing instead on how Kartheiser' s mogul thinks sOihe must suffer and die for a few to thrive. Given the gift of additional time to live by a stranger, Trmberlake is left with the plea: "Don't waste my time."

So he immediately goes to "make them pay," gambling, stealing a girl, antagonizing the rich and powerful. "You can do a lot in one day" is his hero's motto, yet based on Niccol's metaphor of entanglement all he's really doing for the bulk of ~e movie is running after the money. Given all the time in the world, all he wants is more.

Now that's a hero for our time.

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Everybody cut, everybody cut Feetloose AMYVANVEEN THE CASCADE Remak.es, adaptations and based-on films are nothing new to our generation. They may feel a bit like a violation - specifically when they take a classic we know and love and try to make it "new" or "fresh" or whatever other adjective that makes movie producers swoon. But the fact of the matter is there are only a few stories out there and sometimes it is better if a movie just admits upfront that it's the same instead of trying to make something new and cheating audiences out of feigned originality.

Remak.es have been happening for decades, one classic example is You've Got Mail. It's a Hanks/Ryan classic from 1998, but that film was based on another one starring Jimmy Stewart in 1940 called Shop Around the Corner which was a film based on a play from Hungary called Parfumerie from 1937.

Any new remakes we have now are usually remakes of old movies, which can often be traced back to plays, musicals or books. She's All That is the new My FairLadywhich was the new Pygmalion, so the trend is there and no matter how much audiences squawk, they're going to happen.

It's with some trepidation, then, that I· go on to compare Footloose from 1984 and Footloosefrom 2011.

The plot itself was tweaked only slightly, as were the costumes and most of the dialogue. The real comparison, then, is in the characters.

First and foremost is Ren McCormack, the catalyst for Bomont finding a new rhythm (being corny is allowed here since corny is actually this movie's main character). Kevin Bacon played the original Ren with his feathered hair, Bowie tie and angry punch-dancing skills. In that role - which could be argued to be the peak of his career - Bacon created a quintessential character that both Bret McKenzie and Andy Samberg have paid homage to. However, one thing needs to be settled: Bacon looks like the forgotten love child between Miss Piggy and Skeletor. When he kisses the preacher's daughter after she gives him her Bible and his scary Gollum hands creepily lay limp behind her head? Terrifying. Absolutely terrifying. Unknown Kenny Wormald, on the other hand, has mastered the feathered hairstyle that doesn't look like someone sat on it and even though his supposed Boston accent doesn't come out until after his angry darice, he doesn't incite the same fear as Bacon. Unfortunately, though, his continually pursed lips conjure images of dancing Olsen twins more than a gymnast rebel in West Virginia.

The preacher's daughter, Ariel, could be considered the other main character, but in both versions she seems more like a means to an end.

Rebel new kid needs a love inferest whose family situation also ties back to the cai; accident that started this whole mess in the first place. In 1984 the role was filled

by Lori Singer (don't worry, she's still an unknown) who made the sweet-girl-gone-bad look more like sweet-girl-gone-mad. I don't know if she meant to play the girl certifiably insane, but it definitely came across as such. Julianne Hough, Ryan Seacrest's latest

squeeze, plays the new preacher's daughter who manages to up the skank factor in the film all on her own. A dance movie made now is obviously going to have the quintessential rebel-girl look down pat, but despite her more honest performance, I prefer the alarmingly tight jeans of 1984 to the denim cut-offs that were trying to be Daisy Duke but reminded me of Tobias Funke.

The preacher, himself, is a character that I would argue to be of greater importance than Miss Ariel and no matter how hard I try to accept Dennis Quaid as the new town dad, John Lithgow will always_have a special place in my heart. That fire-and-brimstone demeanour mixed with that indistinguishable accent, along with that halo-like receding hairline? Sorry, Quaid. Maybe you could run away with your brother.

Now, obviously Ren McCormack is the hotshot of the town.

He's got the VW Bug, he's got the feathered hair, and he's got that adorable smile. But what about Willard? Adorable Willard with his sunglasses sitting on the brim of his trucker hat and his unfortunately camouflaged wardrobe.

What about him? He can't dance and then he learns how through

one of the greatest montages set to one of the greatest montage songs.

"Let's hear it for the boy," indeed.

Let's hear it for Willard. As much as I love new Willard, though, old Willard had the innocence and unibrow that could make even Sarah Jessica Parker swoon.

On the bad boy side of things, there is a noticeable switch between 1984 and 2011. In 1984, Ren McCormack was the scary looking one and Chuck was pretty adorable - despite his tendency to beat his girlfriend. In the 2011 version, though, Chuck and his entourage of redneck, bus-driving, scruff-faced white trash played a starkly unattractive contrast to the perfectly-coiffed Ren McCormack with his Crest-commercial winning smile.

The tale of the moustachioed man needs to be addressed, as well. There seems to be a certain facial hair code that is adhered to for both the old and the new films.

If a man has a full head of hair and a full Ron Swanson-esque moustache, he is one to be trusted. If, however, a man has a Ron Swanson-esque 'stache and a balding head that he tries to hide with the not-at-all-subtle comb-over strategy, he is not a man to be trusted ..

In 1984, Uncle Wes, a comb-over,

moustachioed man, was in the latter category. He believed the town's view of his nephew, he saw the worst in Ren and he blamed him for everything going wrong in the town. The 2011 Uncle Wes, though, has quite a different character role in the movie. With a full head and face of hair, this Unkey fills the role that the 1984's mother did: he believes in Ren, he stashes Quiet Riot albums and he defends him against Reverend Moore's judgmental tone. This later uncle is not the only example of the trusted facial hair man, both the flour mill owner in the old one and the cotton gin owner in the new one sport moustaches and both of them help the prom happen. Thanks to these trusting upper lips the kids of Bomont find a place to prove themselves trustworthy and dance their way to confetti glory with that quintessential flying V formation that would put the Mighty Ducks to shame.

Since it is a dance movie, though, there needs to be some discussion on each of these films in regards to dancing. Both films share very similar scenes: dancing at the drive-in (though the new one features more of a dance-off and less of a solo show for Chuck), dancing at the bar out of town,

dancing in the warehouse, dancing with Willard, and dancing at prom, but when the dancing starts in the new one, it's focused less on Ren McCormack and more on the spectacle of the scene itself. One priine example would be the bar dancing scene. In 1984, it was a dark, smoky room with close-up shots of the individual dancers and an unimpressed Willard, but in 2011, the entire scene shows off "country linedancing - a white man's wet dream," as Ren explained to Willard, making the shots not about one or two dancers, but about the dance itself.

While I did enjoy the new one, the old one needs to be experienced first and treasured before the latest can be appreciated as a shot-for-shot remake with slightly better hair and slightly disappointing music (namely the slowed down version of Bonnie Tyler's "I Need a Hero"). Whether 1984 or 2011, as soon as Kenny Loggins' version of "Footloose" comes on, I can't help but move my feet along with that quintessential opening scene of toe-tapping and heelclicking glory.

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BASKETBALL

Cascades claim second in Honda Way tournament .

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PAUL ESAU they definitely marked a different THE CASCADE calibre than the Gryphons. UFV The Cascades men's basketball team extended their perfect record (against Canadian opponents) last weekend while hosting the first annual Honda Way Tournament in the Envision Athletic Centre.

The Cascades entered the tournament coming off a three-game domination at the UBC Thunderbirds Invitational, knocking off such formidable opponents as the Wilfred Laurier Golden Hawks (80-70) and the Concordia Stingers (95-86). While the numbers in their own tourney weren't as stellar--the men were one-andone over the weekend--they've yet to lose to a CIS opponent.

UFV started out with aneasy appetizer on Friday, an eastern treat officially known as the University of Guelph Gryphons. Although the visitors initially held the advantage due to the fact that nobody seems to know what a "Guelph" was ("something you'd throw up" commented one spectator), the Cascades quickly settled down to business. Five UFV players ended the night in dou6le-digits, while Mike James, an offseason addition from Winterpeg, was awarded UFV's Player of the Game. The only complaint in the 94-76 drubbing was the officiating, which wavered between the mystical heights of the fevered dream, and downright criminal insanity (read my editorial on page two if you really want my full opinion on the matter).

The main course, on Saturday, proved to be a little less palatable. The Northwest University Eagles aren't a formidable squad on the south side of the border, but

controlled the play and entered halftime with a 37-31 lead, but then the Eagles, led by guard Tyler Mendezona, exploded to double their score in a single quarter. The Cascades looked dangerous in the third, capitalizing off back-to-back threes from Sheldon Bjoorgaard to pull within striking distance. They drew within three in the clostng seconds, only to succumb 81-86.

"Were 4-0 preseason in our Canadian university games," said Cascades coach Barnaby Craddock after the Eagles game, "and those are the counting games for our national top 10 ranking. [Tonight] was a little bit of a free shot at an American team, but it was also to win our tournament and obviously we wanted to win."

Craddock was reluctant to blame the loss on any specific problem. "They obviously played well and made some shots," he stated.

"Basketball is a game of runs and it was a fourth quarter for us. We'll go back and look and see what mistakes we made and try to learn from them. I can't put my finger on one aspect of it right now, but they scored 31 points in the quarter so I imagined defensively it wasn't the best quarter of the preseasori."

Cascades Joel Friesen and Sam Freeman were named to the tournament all-star team, along with Northwest's Jordan Call, Guelph's Daniel McCarthy, and TRU's Chas Kok. Michael Green of Northwest was named the tournament MVP. The Cascades are back in action this Friday against Thompson Rivers University in the first league game of the season.

WEDNESDAY,NOVEMBER2, 2011

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WEDNESDAY,NOVEMBER 2, 2011

HOCKEY

Alexander Sulzer slips quietly onto Canuck b.lueline JOEL SMART

Sure, he's a depth guy, but that he is

THE CASCADE playing well says a lot about the guy Perhaps in order to meet the Canucks' unexplainably high red-head quota, after this summer's loss of the famously-ginger Raffi Torres, GM Mike Gillis signed on defenceman Alexander Sulzer on July 7, 2011. He just recently played his first game with the Canucks, on Wednesday, October 26, in a losing effort to the St. Louis Blues. To his credit, no goals were allowed during his 19:19 of ice time. Although it's too early to say for sure, it looks as though he could be just what the Canucks are looking for from a depth defenceman - reliable. The kind of player who is doing his job when you forget he's even on your team.

Both Sulzer and Alain Vigneault had positive impressions of his first game. "After a couple of shifts, I felt pretty good," Sulzer told The Province. "I like playing with Keith [Ballard] and he made it easier for me to get into the game." Vigneault added that though he hadn't looked over the tapes yet, his impressions were positive. "He had a lot of energy, made some good plays with the puck... I thought he playedwell," he added. The the 6-foot-1, 204-pound player, who wears the number 52, fit into the lineup after Aaron Rome broke his hand.

Well, that, and both Chris Tanev and Andrew Alberts were struggling.

- and also about the kind of defensive depth the Canucks have this year.

Before the season began, playing for the Canucks was just a hope for Sulzer; Sportsnet had even called it a long-shot. Yet Sulzer told The Province that after playing in Vancouver for Team Germany during the Olympics, and after looking at the team's completeness, it looked like the best fit for him. "It made the most sense," he said. "I look at the roster in Vancouver, it's got really, really good depth ... It's a challenge and, for me, it's an exciting challenge." He called it a "huge change" from his time in Nashville, but he felt it was an opportunity too good to pass up. "It's a chance to play in a Canadian city and compete for a Stanley Cup every year." It's the kind of enthusiasm Canucks fans hope for in new recruits.

Born in the hockey-mad city of Kaufbeuren, West Germany, Sulzer grew up playing the game. He played for ESV Kaufbeuren at age 16, which was part of the third-tier German Hockey League called Oberliga. His play got him noticed, and the Nashville Predators selected him in the third round (92nd overall) in the NHL Entry Draft. In the 200304 season, Sulzer advanced to the DEG Metro Stars in the Deutsche Eishockey Liga, a league known for its high numbers of North American

players. After four seasons with DEG, Sulzer moved to the United States and began playing in the AHL with the Milwaukee Admirals. He played 61 games in his rookie year, the 2006-07 season, and scored fQur goals and 15 points.

He was a plus-six. He also had two goals in nine playoff games that year. His first NHL game·came with the Nashville Predators in 2008-09. The next season he had 20 games with the club, and was a plus-four on the year. By 2010-11 he managed 31 games with the club, where he finished a plus-14.

He also scored his first NHL goal that season - it came against the Edmonton Oilers on January 23, 2011. Just a month later, with his contract coming to an end, he was traded to the Florida Panthers for a conditional draft pick.

It was as an unrestricted free agent that Sulzer was able to sign a two-way contract with the Canucks ~ worth $700,000 at the NHL level, and S105,000 at the AHL level. Canucks assistant GM Lorne Henning explained to The Province that man-

agement felt Sulzer had a great deal to bring to the team. "We've been watching him for quite a while now," Henning said after the signing. "He's good on the power play, he moves the puck, he's a really good skater. We're excited to get him. He gives us depth."

Sulzer has adapted well, especially considering his tough start in Vancouver; he was hit especially hard by the Russian plane crash that killed 44 KHL hockey players over the summer. He was excused from

the Canucks training camp to return to Germany for the funeral of his close family-friend, Robert Dietrich, who was on the plane. "We were like brothers - we had known each other almost all of our lives," he told The Vancouver Sun, "I was totally in shock when I first heard. It was a big loss for my whole family."

The two had grown up as next-door neighbours. "He was a really happy guy who made everyone in the room smile and feel better," he reflected.

November 4 November 5

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November 4 _November5

WEDNESDAY,NOVEMBER 2, 2011

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HOCKEY

T •

Goals and goalie fights SEAN EVANS THE CASCADE Krys Kolanos is a name that Heat fans should get used to hearing. For a team that has struggled offensively, . scoring only 12 goals in their first seven games, goals are at a premium.

Losing 5-0 to the Toronto Marlies on October 26, the Heat were looking to bounce back in a big way last Friday night against Grand Rapids. And bounce back they did, with the help of the aforementioned Krys Kolanos.

Kolanos, acquired in over the summer on a professional try-out, played his first game as a member of the Heat and made his presence known, notching a hat-trick and one assist in the 5-1 victory over the Grand Rapids Griffins. Kolanos played on a line with Ben Walter and Jon Rheault, and the three clearly had some chemistry right off the bat, as Walter set up three goals, and Rheault potted a goal and an assist. The addition of !(olanos provided a much needed interview with Abbotsford News: "He energy to the struggling offense, as creates offence every time he's on the goaltender Leland Irving noted in an ice. He's been one of the top players

in this league, and he was definitely a huge boost to this offence."

While the offence has had ~aslow

start, the defence has been tight, especially on the penalty kill. To-date, the Heat have killed 35-of-38 penalties on the season for a percentage of 92.1. The play of goaltender Leland Irving and defenseman TJ Brodie have obviously factored into those solid numbers.

Irving, in fact, notched his sixth win of the season, yet didn't finish the game. Late in the second period, a scramble ensued in front of the Griffin's net, and goaltender Joey MacDonald threw a couple of punches with his blocker, as two fights broke out. Irving took exception to this and skated 200 feet to tangle with MacDonald. The crowd of 5486 erupted as the two goaltenders went at it - Irving landed two punches and earned himself a game misconduct. In an interview with The Abbotsford Times, newcomer Kolanos said of the fight, "I think everyone really enjoyed it, and I'd give him the nod, for sure."

The Heat continued to build on the excitement of Friday's win with a win over the Hamilton Bulldogs this past Sunday afternoon, taking them 6-2. Kolanos continueq to make his

presence known, as he scored one and added two assists, while center Dustin Sylvester potted two of his own. It seems as though the Heat have begun to find their offensive touch. The Heat also managed to kill six penalties, and scored on the manadvantage twice.

The Heat will be back on home ice this Thursday and Saturday with a pair of games against the Oklahoma City Barons.

The Abbotsford Heat By the numbers: Record: 7-3-0-0 Penalty Kill: 92,1 per cent Top Scorer: Ben Walter 3 goals, 6 assists

A nightmare on Abbott Street BALRAJDHILLON CONTRIBUTOR What does Roberto Luongo dress up as for Halloween? For the past five seasons, he's gone as one of the worst goaltenders in the NHL; this season is no different.

Rogers Arena has felt more like a haunted house than home in October for Vancouvrr Canucks goaltender Roberto Luongo. Playing in · just seven of the Canucks first 11 games to start the season, Luongo has been sub-par at best, posting a record of 3-3-1, along with a horrid 3.54 goals against average and a save percentage of 0.869. One has to wonder why he puts on this ugly costume every October.

Since the lockout, Luongo has consistently won 30 or more games every season. In the last five seasons, he has the most accumulated wins in the NHL. In five seasons with the Canucks, Luongo has been a finalist for the Vezna trophy twice, which is awarded to the top goaltender in the League.

He has also been a League MVP finalist once, and he won the Jennings trophy with Cory Schneider, which is awarded to theNHL's top goaltending tandem. To top it all off, Luongo lead the Canucks to the Stanley Cup Finals last season; whether they made it that far because of Luongo is open for debate.

As many Canucks fans wish for Luongo to be traded away and let back up Cory Schneider take over the starting reigns, many forget that Luongo has always played below average to begin the season. ·Last season, Luongo began the season with

a 2-4-1 record in October. In fact, since 2006 Luongo has never had a winning record in October.

However, many Canucks faithful are beginning to lose thei:r patience with the $10 million goalie after blowing the Stanley Cup Finals, a seven-game series in which he was pulled three times.

Expectations this year are even higher than those in seasons past; the core of players that went to the Stanley Cup Finals a few months ago stayed intact and grew even stronger as a team. However, Lu-

ongo has already been pulled twice in this short season and the Canucks have been shut out three times in 11 games after only being shut out five times in 82 games last season. Despite the uncomforting start, Canucks fans have much to look forward to, including recently acquired winger David Booth from the Panthers in exchange for Mikael Samuelsson.

Fortunately for Canucks fans, the calendar has turned a page into November and if history repeats itself, Luongo will catch

fire and play like a top five NHL goalie. Between the months of November and April Roberto Luongo is unbeatable. With Selke winner Ryan Kesler back in the line up, the addition of David booth who is a young, proven 30-goal scorer, and the Sedin twins beginning to find their stride.coming off of back-toback Art Ross trophy wins, the Canucks should find themselves atop of the Western Conference standings in the upcoming weeks.

Is Cory Schneider the answer to a 40-year Stanley Cup drought?

Many are starting to believe so.

But don't count Luongo out yet.

With a high price tag comes high expectations and Luongo knows that. He's won the Gold Medal in the Olympics, despite giving up a late tying goal. He's been all the way to game seven of the Stanley Cup Finals and knows the mental strength that is required to win. He's hungry to return to where he was in June and prove his critics wrong. Thankgoodness it's finally November.

www.ufvcascade.ca

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2011

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SPORTS -

Sports you've never heard of: Frog Jumping JAMES INGLIS kingdom. It's frog against frog in this CONTRIBUTOR heart-pounding contest. Which comI use to question the need for a 24hour TV channel devoted to sports.

Well, let me tell you those days are gqne. Why you ask? Thanks for the interest; an ever-increasing number of under-appreciated sports are seeing a revival of a sort as a result of exposure on television. While frog jumping hasn't yet been highlighted in a big way, I know it is only a matter of time. I know, I thought the same thing too until I started researching this overlooked challenge of brute strength and determination in the frog-eat-fly world of the amphibian

petitor will triumph? Will it be that bullfrog, or that bullfrog, or perhaps that bullfrog over there? The tension can be cut with a knife.

Frog jumping was made famous

by Mark Twain in 1865 when his short story, "The Celebrated Jumping Frog of. Calaveras County" was published and since then there has been no holding back the popularity of the sport. Okay, for a few decades it may have disappeared, but in 1928"it came back with a vengeance and it is steadily growing to become the sport no one really is aware exists today.

While there are many competitions

throughout North America, the "Calaveras Frog Jumping Competition" is arguably the most prestigious event in the frog jumpers' annual calendar.

The rules of the competition are strict. There are three amphibian competitors on the stage at any given time. Each frog must begin the jump while sitting with all four appendages on the launching pad. Once the contest begins only the frog and the frog jockey are permitted to be in front of the launching pad. If at anytime the frog jump's into the frog jockey or the frog jockey's equipment the frog will be disqualified. The jump distance is measured from the launch pad to the length of three consecutive jumps of

the frog. Competitors have a maximum of one minute to complete the three jumps. Jockeys may encourage their frogs by screaming, yelling or banging the stage. Once the frog leaves the launch pad, jockeys must not come into physical contact with their frogs. It is important to remember the frog catcher is not permitted to move until all three jumps have been completed on pain of immediate frog disqualification. The top 50 frogs compete in the "International Frog Jumping Grand Finals" where the top frog's oi:vners can earn a_s much as $5000 in prize money if the jumping record is broken.

While the competition is fierce,

the issue of frog care is an important part of the frog jumping sport and there has been an official "frog welfare policy" in place since 1997. Frog jockeys or any member of the frog handling team that violates the policy or in any way abuses the competitors face banishment from the sport. The competition organizers are anticipating 10,000 frog competitors for the 2012 event.

In an unrelated bit of sporting news the frog-leg eating championships will be held the day after the frog jumping competition has concluded.

FOOTBALL

Suck for luck: The race for last place and first draft-pick in the NFL tans team who started the season off

BALRAJ DHILLON hot but has gradually cooled down.

CONTRIBUTOR Peyton Manning travelled with Guaranteed to be inducted into the NFL Hall of Fame. Two time NFL MVP. Super Bowl winner and MVP. Over 40,000 career passing yards. That's just a starting point to describe the skills and abilities of Indianapolis Colts quarterback (®) Peyton Manning.

The Colts have been a Super Bowl favourite each year for the last 12 years because of Manning. The Manning-less Colts 0-8 record indicates just how vital he is to the success of the franchise. Peyton Manning who underwent back surgery in the off season is out indefinitely and the Colts just can't seem to find any other way to win ball games.

The Colts, who were 0-7 heading into Sunday, were feeling optimistic they might pull out their first win of the season against a Tennessee Ti-

the team to Tennessee but his presence. wasn't enough to inspire Ql3 Curtis Painter to play well enough for a win. The Colts outgained the Titans in yards 399-to-311, but penalties and turnovers lead to their demise. Curtis Painter was sacked twice and threw two interceptions, which lead to 14 points for the Titans; in a game which concluded with a 27-10 loss for the Colts, those 14 points off of turnovers took the Colts out of the game. The Titans also blocked an Indianapolis punt in the end zone, which resulted in seven points. Titans Ql3 Matt Hasselbeck did a great job at managing the game, throwing for 224 yards on 23 passes, and one touchdown to ensure the win. Colts Ql3 Curtis Painter, being watched by Manning, threw for 250 yards on 26 passes but threw two costly interceptions.

At 0-8, the Colts and the Mi-

ami Dolphins are the front-runners to be rewarded the first overall pick in the NFL Draft and get their hands on Stanford University Ql3 Andrew Luck, who is currently ranked number one.

Both teams are desperate to find a quarterback who will help win games. Although the Colts will have Peyton Manning back next se_ason, he only has a couple good years left in him, and the Colts have no young QB's that look ready to step in to a starting position. Andrew Luck was a runner up for the Heisman Trophy, awarded to the top College player in the USA. Luck was projected to go first .overall in the 2011 NFL Draft, but he elected to finish his studies at Stanford University and return for his junior year as ®· The extra year in College will undoubtedly polish up Luck's mechanisms in his throwing and awareness and he should go first overall in the upcoming draft. The only question is to whom.

In other news: it looks like the Vikings have found the answer to their q u a r terback woes .

W i t h Donovan McNabb not working out as planned, the Vikings turned to rookie Ql3 Christian Ponder. Ponder was 18/28 in throwing for 236 yards and one touchdown as Minnesota defeated fellow rookie Ql3 sensation Cam Newton and the Carolina Panthers 24-21. Newton drove down the field in the last two minutes of the fourth quarter and put

the Panthers in prime field goal position to tie the game at 24-all. With 36 seconds, all that was needed to tie the game was a chip shot 31-yard field goal. However, Panthers kicker Olindo Mare missed left on the field goal attempt which began with a high snap. The Panthers fell to 2-6 on the season as the Vikings moved up to 2-6.

HEALTH

Dialling in on the danger of cell phones KAREN ANEY THE CASCADE Mobile phones, while undeniably useful, spark a lot of controversial debate. Recently, the health risks of using cell phones have been under scrutiny, especially regarding their radiation. Health organizations seem unable to conclusively decide if they pose a risk to our health or not, but recent studies indicate that there may be dangers lurking in our purses and pockets.

The first such study was published in an article in the ElectromagneticBiologyand MedicineJournal. The paper is aptly titled "Exposure Limits: The underestimation of absorbed mobile phone radiation, especially in children." The authors of this article say that the current models for measuring cell phone usage are inadequate, and hypothesize that in some cases (namely, children under the age of 18), users could be subjected to radiation levels that are nearly twice what has been declared safe.

The flaw of the current model, they say, is the subject used to test radiation levels. Studies currently

use what is called a SAM: Specific Anthropomorphic Mannequin. The problem with using this model is that the mannequin represents a male who stands at 6-foot-2 and weighs approximately 220 pounds. This is insufficient in a few ways - aside from the obvious size difference.

The main reason this falls flat is that women and children have higher lev-

els of bone marrow, which allows foi higher levels of radiation absorption.

Further, children have thinner skulls than adults - hence the estimated twice-as-high levels of radiation they could be receiving.

The article suggests that in order to truly measure the levels of radiation absorption caused by mobile phones, a study with a large sample group

using "MRI-based computer simulation." While no organizations have stepped forward to fund or conduct this study, the World Health Organization has recently upgraded its classification of mobile phone radiation to being possibly carcinogenic, or cancer qmsing. Translation?

There are some serious concerns regarding the long-term impact of cell phone use.

Another study that has caused some concern is one conducted by the Institute of Cancer Epidemiology in Copenhagen. In this study, researchers utilized the registry system which Denmark keeps of each citizen. They used this to track the health of almost the entire Danish population from the time mobile phones were introduced until the publication date of the study. Their findings say that there is absolutely no correlation between cell phone usage and brain cancer (or malignant tumours), but there are a few problems with their conclusion.

Perhaps the biggest flaw is one that was pointed out by the report itself. The problem is that the health

of citizens was correlated with personal cell phone subscriptions with the user's name on the bill. The study does not account for what they refer to as "corporate subscriptions": this means that any use of company mobile phones was not accounted for.

There are further issues with the study- mainly, critics claim the study was not conducted over a long enough period of time.

According to their website, Health Canada controls the levels of radiation that cell phones may emit by allowing levels that are 50 times lower than what is deemed medically safe.

Again, the concept of"medically safe" is determined by the levels measured on the SAM (the over-sized mannequin); in other words, despite the low levels allowed, some Canadians may still be in danger. If you'd like to reduce your risk of health problems, they suggest "limiting the length of cell phone calls", "using 'hands-free' devices", and, "replacing cell phone calls with text messages". So, if we've learned one thing, we know that unlimited texting is a totally justified expense.

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