62
The Ugly Step Sisters
The next morning (after a stupendous opening night) a rather sleepy Harlequin took the twins and Arthur Canarthy to the palazzo where Cinderella lived.
Ebenezer Smythe
stayed in bed feeling distinctly worse for wear after celebrating the play’s success with Pietro. They cautiously knocked on the door of Signora Glitterati’s fabulous and vast abode, after Harlequin explained that he would have to wait for them back at the theatre (as Cinderella’s stepmother had made it clear he was not welcome in her house). He quickly 63
scampered away as the housekeeper opened the door and sniffily looked them up and down, before taking Mr. Arthur Canarthy’s business card through to her mistress. The sour faced housekeeper duly came back a few moments later and begrudgingly let them in. Now the first and most extraordinary thing they all noticed as they walked through into the plum coloured reception area was the enormous staircase that led to the first floor. This was no ordinary staircase as it actually unfurled when people needed to use it and then rolled back up when it was finished. They witnessed this first hand as Signora Glitterati slowly made her way down towards them. It had to be said that Cinderella’s step mother was spectacularly hideous to behold with a fat puffy face and flabby jowls. She 64
had a piggy kind of nose and spiteful eyes that were as sharp and unpleasant as a hornet’s sting. She was dressed from head to toe in an expensive long purple gown, which was trimmed with the finest lace that money could buy and her feet had been crammed into ridiculously high silk shoes to match the dress. “My housekeeper tells me you are an English merchant and that you wanted to speak to me on an urgent matter. So what is so important that you could not send a letter of introduction in advance,” she frowned, as she swept past beckoning for them to follow. “I suppose you had better come through to the parlour, though this is highly irregular and extremely inconvenient.” The Leadington twins glanced at each other doubtfully, trying to take in the bizarre surroundings that they found themselves 65
walking through – you see the other interesting aspect of the mansion was that as people moved from one room to the other, their clothes altered colour to match the space they were standing in - it was a most remarkable sight to behold! For example as they passed into the long hallway, which was a bright red, their clothes suddenly changed to a vibrant crimson hue and when they walked through into a large salon, they found their garments were transformed into shades of navy, marine and cobalt to compliment the plush blue wallpaper. The library area was decorated green and when Signora Glitterati threw one of her legendary dinner dances, this was where the gentlemen would retire to smoke after dinner cigars, sporting smart suits of emerald, moss and lime whilst the ladies played cards in the opulent pink of the 66
ballroom, wearing shades of rose and strawberry ice-cream. Yes, indeed the abode that Cinderella lived in was quite something to behold, not that she got to enjoy any of it, her stepmother made sure of that. As the small group followed Signora Glitterati into the elegant cool of the lemon yellow parlour they could never have expected to encounter such vile and revolting people such as Cinderella’s stepsisters, who sat sipping tea in their frothy buttermilk frocks. They did not bother to rise as their uninvited guests entered but rather eyed them up with a distinct air of distain. It was clear that they were also twins, though unlike Albert and Florrie, they were identical twins. “Has that wretched dressmaker Signora Trattori sent these people over for our final fittings?� asked one of the young women, as 67
she daintily nibbled on a biscuit. “I thought she was coming herself, not sending one of her minions, and who are those scruffy little urchins? Tell them to leave immediately and to inform their mistress that we will not be happy if so much as a single seam is puckered!” “My darlings Ruby and Jade, I will make sure you shall both look the belles of the ball,” soothed Signora Glitterati sitting down next to her daughters and smoothing out the creases in her vanilla skirt. “You must not worry your pretty heads - everything will be wonderful, just wait and see.” “So who are these people then?” “I apologise for the intrusion and for our abrupt arrival, but time is of the essence and until a few days ago we did not realise that we would need to speak with you,” 68
started Arthur Canarthy, after he had formally introduced everybody, attempting to be as gracious as possible. “You’re not making any sense.
I
suggest you make your intentions clear sooner rather than later, as you can see we are busy,” declared Signora Glitterati, taking a bite out a chocolate and cream cake. “I am planning a very special masked ball for a very important person tomorrow night and there is much to organise – it shall be the society event of the year in Venice so everything must be perfect! I do not have the time or inclination to entertain strangers.” “I quite understand that you have pressing matters to attend to but I just ask for another few moments of your precious time,” continued Arthur Canarthy, as he pressed on and explained as succinctly as he could about 69
the ninth quest. Whilst the children waited patiently, they became increasingly fascinated with
Cinderella’s
step
sisters’
bizarre
behaviour - you see as one would take a sip of tea the other would swallow. It was a strange habit that they had. For example if Jade took a mouthful of food, then Ruby would chew it. They also seemed to finish off each other’s sentences, as if they were telepathic. As one might expect with identical twins, they looked exactly the same in every detail. Both had long oval faces with skin the colour of opals and narrow noses. Their cheeks were high and well defined, their eyes large and hooded. Both of them had elaborately curled hair and their faces were heavily painted. It was clear from their pampered appearance that neither of them had ever done a day’s work in their lives. Though outwardly they appeared quite 70
beautiful both of the twins noticed the women’s pursed, spiteful mouths and felt rather uncomfortable about the way the sisters looked at them as if they were cockroaches that needed crushing. Albert and Florrie also got the distinct impression that Cinderella’s step sisters were the type of people who thought they were better than everybody
else
and
had
nasty,
ugly
personalities beneath their polished veneers. “I’m bored of these tedious people Mother.
Can’t you tell them to leave?”
yawned Ruby, as she snapped her fingers at a nearby maid making the poor girl jump. “Girl! Our teapot needs replenishing. Come on, we haven’t got all day!” “Yes, we really are quite parched,” Jade added, brushing a curl back from her face. 71
“And get some more of those little biscuits…oh but not those plain ones that are served to uninvited riff raff who really should know when they have outstayed their welcome,” added Ruby, staring pointedly at the small group who were still standing awkwardly in the middle of the parlour. “We want those luxury chocolate ones.” “Anyway,” continued Arthur Canarthy, clearing his throat, “as I was saying we need some of your step daughter Cinderella’s tears. I know it must seem a very odd request but...” “Stop right there,” replied Signora Glitterati, narrowing her piggy eyes at him. “It is totally out of the question and utterly preposterous!” “Please I beseech you, we have come so far...maybe we could put our case to your step daughter directly? If I could speak to her, I 72
mean surely it must be her decision...please this is very important to us.” “Everything that Cinderella has belongs to me, including her tears. Indeed she is fortunate that I let her live under this roof!” snapped Signora Glitterati. “Yes, she’s lucky we let her cook and clean for us, the ungrateful wretch that she is,” sneered Ruby. “This is all too ludicrous for words. Now leave my house immediately and do not trouble me ever again with this madness!” Signora Glitterati snarled, as she stood up abruptly and rang a small hand bell. “But the children will never see their parents again!” protested Arthur Canarthy. “I don’t care and trying to make me feel guilty will not work. I won’t tell you again, get out! I am extremely busy - I have a firework 73
display to organise and I don’t have time for this nonsense!” she screeched, as the housekeeper hastened into the parlour. “You heard our mother, get lost and don’t darken our doorstep again!” added Jade. “Show them out and don’t let anymore tradesmen
in
again
unless
they
have
specifically made a prior arrangement. Get them out of my sight...oh and send one of the maids to fetch that wretched dressmaker!” ordered
their
mother,
dismissing
the
housekeeper with a flick of the wrist. “Come on Uncle Arthur, there’s no point speaking to them anymore, they’re not going to help us,” said Florrie quietly. As they gloomily left Signora Glitterati’s house and trudged off to find Harlequin, they could not have felt in worst spirits. 74
Meanwhile, back inside the parlour Ruby and Jade were tittering away, as the group’s unsuccessful visit was forgotten almost immediately whilst they excitedly discussed the forthcoming ball that their mother was throwing for them. “So my dear sister, what do you think the count will be like?
Mother says he’s
very…” “…wealthy. Yes, indeed. One of the richest men in Verona and he’s coming here – imagine that?!” “Yes, imagine. I mean I know mother says he’s not much to look at but…” “…who cares!” simpered Jade. “Quite a catch by all accounts and not married…” “...at the moment, sister dear, but that could all change…” 75
“You’re quite right, indeed it might. Just imagine if he decided to marry one of us…” At that moment the maid returned with a tray of fresh tea and biscuits. She set it down on the table and began to lay everything out. “Well this is a disgrace! There is no doily on the biscuit plate…” complained Jade. “...and this tea is far too strong!” “But I’ve only just made it,” protested the poor maid. “Well you obviously didn’t do a very good job!
Now get us some more tea,
something that doesn’t look as if it has been sitting in the pot for several days…and clean teaspoons!” said Jade haughtily. “Really, mother needs to do something about the staff!” added Ruby. 76