The Beast - December 2023

BEAST The

December 2023

Cricket is home

v Strikers Double Hurricanes Sun 26 Nov 10.10am followed by Header Sixers v Thunder Sixers v Renegades Fri 8 Dec 7.15pm

Sixers v Strikers Fri 22 Dec 7.15pm

Tickets on sale now

sydneycricketground.com.au/events

Sixers v Stars Tues 26 Dec 7.15pm

Take Away Fish & Chips, Burgers, Salads, Ice Creams & Drinks.

OPEN 7 DAYS FROM 12PM-9PM

CLOVELLYHOTEL.COM.AU/CHIPPO

Environmental Levy Sustaining our City for the next 20 years Since 2004, Randwick Council’s sustainability initiatives and environmental improvements have been funded by an Environmental Levy. The levy has five key priority areas: • Conserving our coast • Tackling climate change • Protecting biodiversity • Reducing consumption of resources • Community engagement and education As the levy is due to expire in June 2024, Randwick City Council is seeking your feedback on the Environmental Levy from 7 November to 19 December.

You can obtain info about the Environmental Levy in the following ways: • Electronically on Council’s Your Say Randwick website yoursay.randwick.nsw.gov.au • Hard copy at these locations: – Randwick Council Administration Building, 30 Frances Street Randwick – Lionel Bowen Library, 669-673 Anzac Parade, Maroubra – Margaret Martin Library, Royal Randwick Shopping Centre, Randwick – Malabar Community Library, 203 Anzac Parade, Matraville

SURVEY

PROPOSED PROJECTS

Every Randwick City ratepayer will receive a letter and survey in the mail. Follow the instructions to complete the survey online using the supplied unique URL and QR code, or complete the paper survey and mail it back to Council. Note you only need to complete one survey option.

COASTAL

TELEPHONE SURVEY

FOOD

We’ll be phoning 750 randomly selected Randwick City residents in November 2023 to seek your views. If we phone you, please consider taking part.

SUBMISSIONS If you wish to provide a submission to Council, you may do so through the following means: • Online at yoursay.randwick. nsw.gov.au • Email to council@randwick.nsw.gov.au marked “Submission: Environmental Levy” • In writing to Randwick City Council, “Submission: Environmental Levy”, 30 Frances Street, Randwick NSW 2031.

Coastal walkway Connecting with our marine environment CLIMATE & RESILIENCE Sustainability rebates Helping households save energy and water

Communal gardens Growing our community together COASTAL Gross pollutant traps (GPTs) Keeping our beaches clean BIODIVERSITY & HABITAT Creating more green spaces and revitalised creeks Supporting our natural environment our Watch plainer te ex 2-minuo to learn vide e about thental m Environ vy Le

WHAT CONTINUING OR STOPPING THE ENVIRONMENTAL LEVY WOULD MEAN FOR YOU OPTION 1 CONTINUE LEVY

OPTION 2 DISCONTINUE LEVY

Under this option, ratepayers continue paying the Environmental Levy and it is made permanent.

The levy will fund important sustainability improvements, maintenance and projects.

This option proposes discontinuing the Environmental Levy. Ratepayers would receive a small reduction in their rates, but Council will have to cancel, reduce or delay many sustainability projects.

Conserving water and

Tackling climate

✔ reducing pollution

✔ change and reducing

Public renewables ✔ and EV charging

Sustainability grants, ✔ community workshops and programs

entering our oceans

urban heat island effect

Completing coastal walkways including ✔ whale watching platforms What continuing/ discontinuing the levy will cost you Overall rate increase (including/excluding Environmental Levy) over one year

Completing coastal walkways including

$1.95

$0.28

Residential ratepayers

-$101

-$1.95

-$0.28

Business ratepayers

$139

$2.68

$0.38

Business ratepayers

-$139

-$2.68

-$0.38

per year

per year

11.67%

per week per week

per day per day

Overall cumulative increase for 2024/25 including: • Rate peg (assumed at 5%) • Continuing Environmental Levy

Year 1 2024-25

Average annual rate

$1,449 $72 $1,449

$1,521

per year

5.00%

per week per week

Current year 2023-24

Year 1 2024-25 $1,449 $72

$1,449

$1,521

$101

$97

$0

$1,546

$1,521

N/A

-$101

For business ratepayers - ceasing levy Current year 2023-4

$7,153

Average annual rate**

$7,511

Year 1 2024-5 $7,153

$358 $7,153

$358 $7,153

$7,511

$133

$139

$133

$0

$7,286

$7,650

$7,286

$7,511

N/A

per day

For residential ratepayers - ceasing levy

$1,622

Year 1 2024-5

per day

Overall cumulative increase for 2024/25 including: • Rate peg (assumed at 5%) • Environmental Levy discontinued

$97

Current year 2023-4

Total average business rates and Environmental Levy Rates savings if levy not continued

per year

$1,546

For business ratepayers - retaining levy

ENVIRONMENTAL LEVY

!

Sustainability grants, community workshops and programs

$101

Annual rate increase rate peg* Total average residential rates

Annual rate increase rate peg* Total average business rates

!

urban heat island effect

Public renewables and EV charging

Residential ratepayers

Current year 2023-24

Total average residential rates and Environmental Levy Rates savings if levy not continued

Tackling climate

! change and reducing

entering our oceans

! whale watching platforms

For residential ratepayers - retaining levy

ENVIRONMENTAL LEVY

Conserving water and

! reducing pollution

-$139

*Annual rate increase (rate peg) is set by IPART. The Council's financial forecasts rely on the assumptions outlined in our Long-Term Financial Plan 2023-33, adopted by Council in September 2023. The rate peg by IPART has not been determined at the time of this publication. Any variance between the assumptions in the Long-Term Financial Plan and the Council's estimates will directly affect the financial outcomes. ** excludes Port Botany businesses (29 properties)

1300 722 542 yoursay.randwick.nsw.gov.au

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HENRY’S THE JUNIORS

Welcome Note

Feeling Festive Words James Hutton, Publisher Welcome to the December 2023 edition of The Beast, the monthly magazine for Sydney’s purple-blue beaches of the east.

This has been the best Jacaranda season I can remember, and it’s always such a special time of year. Although the iconic trees are not native to Australia (the genus Jacaranda originated in South America), they have been growing here for more than 150 years now.

This month’s cover art comes from Bronte’s Wallace Eggleton.

Wallace works as a Waverley lifeguard, so you probably would have seen him saving lives down at the beach. You can see more of his work by visiting his website, wallacethegromit.com, or on his Instagram, @wallacethegromit.

There’s still time to enter The Beast Young Writers Competition. There are two categories, Short Story and Poetry, and

anyone who lives in The Beast’s distribution area and is aged 18 or under is invited to enter. The short stories need to be between 500-600 words and the poems need to be under 300 words. The only rule is that it needs to be an original work with local relevance that hasn’t been entered in any other competition.

To enter the competition, email your short story or poem to james@thebeast.com.au and include your name, age, suburb and phone number. First prize in each category is $150, second prize is $50, third prize is a pat on the back. Entries close on November 30 and I’ll also publish the winners in The Beast!

Clovelly’s biggest Christmas Street Party is on again this year on Sunday, December 3. St Luke’s church, Clovelly, invites everyone to come and discover some Christmas joy with our local community. There will be live music and free kids’ activities including a giant obstacle course, face painting, a petting zoo, jumping castle and more

8 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

from 4-6pm. Snocones, gelato, popcorn and a barbecue dinner will be available, as well as food from the amazing Wholegreen Bakery. Carols will kick off from 6pm, as well as a puppet show for the kids. For more information, please visit clovelly.org.au.

Wishing all of you a fun-filled festive season with family and friends. We are all so lucky to live in this beautiful, safe part of the world.

Cheers, James

The Beast

The Beast Pty Ltd ABN 32 143 796 801 www.thebeast.com.au Editor james@thebeast.com.au Advertising Enquiries advertising@thebeast.com.au Rates and Specs thebeast.com.au/advertise Circulation 60,000 copies are delivered every month; 58,000 in mailboxes and 2,000 in shops.

Wednesday 13 December 2023

5–8pm

Bondi Park, Bondi Beach

waverley.nsw.gov.au

CONTENTS December 2023 Issue 227 08 Welcome Note 10 Contents 12 Pearls of Wisdom 14 Monthly Mailbag 24 Local Artist 26 Local News 32 Crime News

Sunset Rowers, by Gilly Garcia

34 Local Photos 36 Kieran's Satire 38 Unreliable Guide 40 Headnoise 42 Marj's Musings 44 Fishing Report 45 Tide Chart

46 Dana's Recipe 47 Classifieds 48 Brainteasers 49 Reviews 50 Beardy from Hell 50 Trivia Solutions

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P RE S E N T E D BY

P LAT I NUM S PONS OR

Festive Lights Competition 2023 Get into the festive spirit!

Submissions close 6pm 10 December.

Scan the QR code for details.

Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 11

Pearls of Wisdom

We all know how this game ends.

The Joys of JoMO Words Pearl Bullivant Photo Monica Opoly Pearl doesn’t want a lot for Christmas, a Range Rover is not a thing I need.

I don’t care about trendy sunglasses underneath the Christmas tree.

I don’t need a pair of PE Nation leggings hanging upon the fireplace.

Santa Claus won’t make me happy with a Bvlgari calfskin handbag on Christmas Day...

This Christmas, let us gather together as a community and channel the spirit of Jamie Packer’s ex-fiancée, living by the words of her kitsch holiday song (as modified by Pearl) and celebrating JoMO - the Joy of Missing Out. Unfortunately, for many of us living in the Eastern Suburbs, the concept of missing

out is anathema, striking fear into those who cannot fathom the idea of not being on-trend or social media worthy. With property prices at all-time highs and residency limited to those either lucky enough to be in high salaried occupations or who have access to generational wealth, the Eastern Suburbs has become a locale in which the wealthy control the cost of housing while setting a high maintenance lifestyle agenda.

In this toxic environment, the Fear of Missing Out (FoMO) is strong. Living amongst the wealthy is difficult; life becomes an endless competition of flaunting one’s material possessions and bragging about one’s accomplishments. At its worse, this wealth becomes an object

12 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

of irony to flaunt on TikTok or Insta (if showing off one’s material possessions passes for satire, there is no room for Pearl in the piss-take space). Inevitably, aspirational transcendence and FoMO takes centre stage as one’s mission in life is to outJones the Joneses. With FoMO, one never has enough.

In a world that has become increasingly gamified and judgemental, where success is judged by status, material acquisitions and outward displays of wealth (which possibly hide an internal burden of debt), JoMO is a breath of fresh air.

Psychology Today calls the Joy of Missing Out the emotionally intelligent antidote to the Fear of Missing Out. Unlike FoMO, which is ruled by market forces, JoMO is a state of being present and content with what one has in life, all without having to spend a small fortune on yoga gear and mindfulness retreats.

JoMO allows one to critically examine lifestyle choices, actively ignoring criticism from peers or social media. When you live in a state of JoMO, you focus on what you need to survive, not what is fashionable or expensive. You stop considering yourself poor because you don’t have what your neighbours have and instead you count your blessings in life, even if that blessing is a Hyundai i30 rather than a Mercedes A-Class hatchback.

Despite all our comforts, ample salaries and spoilt-brat lifestyles, FoMO has overtaken our grip on reality to the point where it is now viewed as a mental illness. This Christmas, let us embrace a radical shift in Eastern Suburbs philosophy by instead celebrating JoMO, recognising we can still live a life of abundance and ease without the Club Med skiing holiday and the Bohemian Bright beach cart. Merry Christmas!

BAC

COOGK AT BEAC EE H

Best Gift Market is back for Christmas!

Sunday 3 December 9am-6pm Coogee Beach Don’t forget your reusable

With more than 160 local artisans, creatives, home-crafters and designers you’ll find perfect handmade, environmentally friendly Christmas gifts!

• Live music, entertainment and activities • Beachside Bargain Hunt • Multicultural food trucks • Photos with our Green Santa • Fresh native Christmas trees and plants

ONE DAY ONLY, DON’T MISS OUT! This project is funded

by Environmental Levy.

1300 722 542 randwick.nsw.gov.au

Monthly Mailbag

The Beast's Monthly Mailbag Words The Good People of the Eastern Beaches November's Cover Dear James - The cover of November’s edition of The Beast showing a placid and welcoming Tamarama Beach was a delight.

It served as a reminder of how nice the beach and the surrounding areas can be when it is not filled with materials moved from scrap metal yards that pretend to be artistic.

It should also be noted that the organisers of this year’s Sculpture by the Sea event are again claiming attendance of 450,000 people. How this figure is arrived at is anyone’s guess, because the maximum number of people who could possibly get to the area by public transport in those 16 days is around 300,000 people - and that includes all those locals who use public transport to get to and from work, shopping, medical appointments, worship, visiting friends and basically living life.

There is little or no visitors’ parking in the area, so attendance by private transport can be discounted. I would also like to remind the organisers that not everyone who catches a bus to Bondi, Tamarama or Bronte is coming for this event, so they cannot be counted as ‘attendees’.

Tamarama, South Bondi and Bronte are suburbs - not just venues and destinations.

Doug Richards Tamarama Your Rates at Work Waverley Council lifeguards are responsible for beach safety and activities all day, every day. The surf club provides them limited seasonal assistance, mostly on weekends.

Strangely, Council allowed the surf club - not the lifeguards primacy of design input as to the proposed “community building” at Bronte Beach, with the lifeguards to be housed with a less than optimal viewpoint of their domain. Additionally, the space to be provided for Council park employees, who do an incredible job, appears to be insufficient.

This project will cost ratepayers a motza. Based on an outdated cost estimate of an earlier rejected design of $13.64 million, ratepayers would be up for a “capped” $7.6 million, which still leaves a $2 million shortfall. The “capped” $7.6 million is illusory as the contract would require ratepayers to meet any ultimate shortfall in the actual cost. Council has no formal cost estimate of the new design, but $20 million is being thrown around as a guesstimate.

The proposed wave mitigation structures to be placed on the beach to protect the proposed grandiose building have not been exhibited. I shudder to think what they might look like on our little beach and wonder what the cost will be.

65 per cent of the membership claimed by the surf club are nippers and their parents, who are required to enrol but are not even issued entry fobs that allow access to the club toilets and showers.

Unlike the other 35 per cent, they are expected to use public facilities in the “community building” rather than those of the private club they are said to be members of. Perhaps the minority 35 per cent are elite or sensitive souls who need to be elevated beyond or protected from public gaze.

14 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

Council is considering replacing the “community building” with two structures. One will have two stories exclusively for the private club, with the upper floor being for a tavern/function centre. The other will be a modest building that would provide amenities for the public and the 65 per cent who are neither elite nor sensitive souls.

Duplication of such amenities has been criticised by the independent Waverley Design Excellence Advisory Panel. It adds significantly to the cost and to the required floor space. Two buildings instead of one also adds to the cost.

If it is okay for 65 per cent to use public facilities, I question the appropriateness of Council substantially footing the bill for two buildings and duplication of amenities for the benefit of the 35 per cent.

Greg Maidment Bronte Randwick High Schools Merger Will Erode Choice The headline in your recent article regarding the proposed amalgamation of Randwick Girls’ High School and Randwick Boys’ High School refers to “Overwhelming Support” (Randwick High Schools Amalgamation Receives ‘Overwhelming Support’, The Beast, November 2023). This is false or misleading news.

There is much opposition and little support from the families who have chosen Randwick Girls’ High School for their daughters.

There is also an awareness that this proposal does not add choice - in fact it removes choice for many families in the East. There are already three public co-educational secondary schools in the immediate area, being South Sydney High School, Matraville Sports High School and J J Cahill Memorial High School.

The choice of a girls only single sex secondary education will be denied.

Marjorie O’Neill, Prue Car and the Labor Party are guilty of betrayal of the ‘Labor heartland’.

Disadvantaged minority groups including lower income families who desire a girls’ school but

www.willsproperty.com.au Wills Property would like to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Thankyou for a great 2023.

We look forward to assisting you with your property requirements in 2024.

Kind regards,

John Wills

Wills Property willsproperty.com.au 02 9387 1700 Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 15

Monthly Mailbag cannot afford the private options, ethnic and cultural minorities whose values necessitate it, the LGBTQ+ community who are more comfortable in a single sex environment, and girls themselves are being sacrificed for blind political expediency and a hope that outcomes for boys may improve. The choice of a single sex girls’ education for these groups is being stolen from them by this government.

The current Principal of Randwick Boys’ High School initially proposed that Randwick Boys’ become co-educational with a gradual phasing in of girls from Year 7. This option, plus widening the drawing areas of the three existing co-educational schools, is a far more rational option than the current ill-advised and ill-conceived rush amalgamation.

Randwick Girls’ High School is a successful comprehensive public school that is not broken and should not be sacrificed.

The “broader curriculum” that is referred to in the article is already on offer. For many years the two schools have offered students from each campus the opportunity to study courses at the other school. In the School Show/Rock Eisteddfod, both schools have worked together in successful productions for decades. In reality, as the numerical decline in enrolments intensifies as a result of this ill-fated decision, the curriculum will become narrower. Enrolments at Randwick Girls’ started to fall as soon as the rumour emerged.

Current students of Randwick Girls’ are advising their teachers that they are now on waiting lists for private girls’ schools.

The ultimate folly will be the closure and sale of one of the sites with billions in revenue for the state government. In the immediate eastern area during my career, three co-ed public schools have been closed, two of which have been sold off (Maroubra Bay High School, Maroubra High School and Randwick North High School). A Labor government that will be furthering the decline of public education and the growth of the private sector is not the Labor that I have supported in the past!

Throw-away, unsubstantiated statements such as, “...many see the buildings as no longer fit for purpose,” are not valid. If this “many” were to venture inside Randwick Girls’ High School they would become aware that millions of public dollars have been spent recently, including through 2023, to make the facilities leading edge and very fit for purpose.

These expenditures include two new state of the art science laboratories, two new cutting-edge fully equipped kitchen teaching areas, a high-tech laser printing and copying classroom, a new timber and woodwork classroom with all of the latest required tools and machinery, landscaping of all areas of the grounds and the renovation of the Multi-Purpose Centre. This list does not include improvements to Randwick Boys’ High School including the new high performance physical training centre. Marjorie O’Neill has visited the schools on occasion in recent years, but perhaps with ‘eyes wide shut’.

The article explained that, “Building work is scheduled to commence over the upcoming summer break...” This implies that such capital expenditures are a result of the amalgamation process, which is misleading.

The renewal and renovation programs at both schools commenced some years ago and have continued through 2023.

The article also stated, “A petition headed ‘Save Randwick Girls’ is active on change.org but had only attracted 58 signatures as The Beast was going to press,” but there were 2,408 support signatures on this petition by October 27!

The author continues a degree of one-sidedness with the statement, “But most see single sex schools as a relic of the past.” If they considered contemporary reality they would recognise that there are nine long-established very successful private girls only secondary schools in the East. These are expanding, not becoming relics, and all have long waiting lists and school populations close to or well above the thousand. Their educated view must also include that relic named Sydney Girls’ High School!

16 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

The last paragraph, which quoted Liam Burns, a co-convenor of the Eastern Suburbs P&C Alliance, said, “We’re delighted by the news that our local state high school will no longer exclude anybody.” This is not true; the proposed new school will exclude all those families who desire the choice of a single sex education for their daughters.

Geoffrey James Teacher and Head Teacher in NSW Public High Schools since 1975 Current Head Teacher, Social Sciences Faculty, Randwick Girls' High School Discover the Real Deal Hey, The Beast magazine - I couldn’t believe my eyes when I read your article about the Coogee Bay Hotel’s beer prices.

As a regular at the Coogee Legion Club down the road, I’ve experienced a completely different reality. Every beer there is a steal - well under $10 - and I’m talking $5.50 schooners during the generous happy hour from 4-6pm, Monday-Friday.

I believe everyone should enjoy an affordable schooey after a long day’s work without feeling like they’re being taken for a ride, especially in times like these when the cost of living is already squeezing us dry.

We’ve got to spread the word that there are places where you can still enjoy a fair-priced brew and relax without breaking the bank. Cheers to more affordable schooeys for all!

Harrison James Coogee Bogey Hole Dramas I’m writing about an unfortunate incident I was involved in this morning at the Bronte Women’s Bogey Hole.

A couple of surf lifesaving members decided to run drills in the Bogey Hole. This was despite there being a very workable sandbar at the north end that the Council lifeguards asked them to use but they refused to use. I asked these gentlemen (I use the term sarcastically) to leave and take their kids’ group to the open water. Although it was a bit rough it was still quite safe at the north end.

Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 17

Monthly Mailbag I requested this more than a dozen times, but they refused to leave and I ended up shouting and demanding that they stick to the rules of their club and use the beach appropriately. In front of their children’s group they staunched me and pretended they didn’t know the rules. These children deserve better role models.

Adapting the drill to suit the conditions was beyond their capacity as leaders, which is very troubling. I would certainly expect a dangerous incident to result from this style of risk management.

The surf club has become quite corrupted with a kind of corporate boys’ club mentality that brings shame on a once fine institution.

When they finally left the Bogey Hole, I saw their body language and their intention to return to the Bogey Hole, refusing to leave until they inevitably had to depart for their respective obligations.

To the elitist clubbies: the only benefit this grotesque social club will be to your careers is to ensconce you further in a slow death by toxic masculinity in corporate Sydney.

The poor children that are subjected to this display of disrespect for women and the rules they swear to uphold are at risk.

I hope their parents are aware of the cost their choice is imposing on their children.

Rag Veda Bronte The Bondi Hum Hi Beast - I reckon I’ve cracked the mystery of ‘The Hum’ (Nothing Humdrum About The Hum, The Beast, November 2023).

After countless sleepless nights spent googling the source of the annoying, low humming sound outside my window, my conclusion is... it’s tawny frogmouths!

Have a look at https:// youtu.be/Ohu9mPFMXEk? feature=shared and listen closely.

While they are very cute, they’re driving me nuts at night.

I’m not sure how to solve the issue given they are protected, but this theory is a lot more likely than ship engines and earth crust! What do you think?

Jenna Bondi

The Hum My daughter, who lives in Bondi, gives me copies of your splendid organ.

I recently read The Invisible Rainbow by Arthur Firstenberg (Chelsea Green Publishing 2022). At page 305 the following appears: Low frequency sounds The low frequency Hum is heard by between two and eleven percent of the population. (fn.29) This is fewer than hear the high frequency sound, but the effects of the Hum can be far more disturbing...

The probable sources of the Hum are powerful ultrasonic radio broadcasts modulated at extremely low frequencies to communicate with submarines.

Thanks for the giggle while reading everybody’s far-fetched theories (the earth’s crust and its audible rumble!?! Bahahaha), and I hope my answer to this longstanding baffling mystery doesn’t result in too many new neighbourly disputes amongst you all.

Mersini North Bondi P.S. If they don’t have a swimming pool it’s probably their air conditioning unit.

Antennas to propagate these frequencies exist all over the world, including Australia, but controlled, of course, by the Americans. There is a wellknown one at Exmouth, Western Australia. Whether there is one in the Eastern Suburbs ought to be ascertainable.

Stuart Dickson Gormans Hill

Green Credentials How does Randwick City Council continue to receive green awards? Everywhere I look there is cement being laid. Pathways and gutters are essential, but too much restricting intersections, corners made square, adding or enlarging traffic islands and making everything concrete.

Balancing this, they are closing slip roads to plant greenery, which would be good if those slip roads weren’t essential for efficient traffic flow. Locals’ voices have fallen on deaf ears. Council is getting it soooo wrong.

Margie Coogee

The Hum Mystery Spoiler Alert!

Responding to the hilarious ongoing investigation of ‘The Hum of the Eastern Suburbs’ that is heard by people all over the East and keeps them up at night, sometimes between 3-4am... I’m sorry to spoil this mystery, however I’m certain I have the answer!

Your neighbours have most likely done what I have, which is to set their pool filtering systems to run every night in order to take advantage of the off-peak discount to electricity at that time. When set to start at 3am you minimise the risk of the noise keeping your neighbours from falling asleep as most assume everybody is already snoozing so late into the evening.

With so many swimming pools in our area I’m not surprised that so many residents - but not all - are constantly hearing this mechanical noise in the middle of the night.

Noisy Motorcycles I ride a bike. I enjoy the experience of freedom and fresh air and leaning to take corners and the ability to find parking anywhere.

I have also heard the idiom ‘loud pipes save lives’, referring to the common practice of replacing factory-standard mufflers for louder versions so that other road users are aware of one’s presence on the road.

This being said, there are some who take it too far. For example, the group of six or so riders on obnoxiously loud Harleys who find the need to exercise their manhood with their super-loud bikes at every nice weekend down at Bondi Beach. We all know who they are; we can all hear their choppers kilometres away. What I don’t get is how they are able to get away with it?

There is a 94 decibel legal limit for motorcycles in New South Wales (90 decibels for cars).

This is equivalent to a hairdryer

18 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

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Wishing you a happy and safe holiday season

The James Ledgerwood Team 0417 927 517 jledgerwood@mcgrath.com.au Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 19

Monthly Mailbag blowing by your ear, or pushing a lawnmower while mowing the lawn. As a resident who lives on Bondi Road, it is blatantly obvious that these idiots are riding bikes that have easily exceeded this limit many times. Why haven’t the riders been stopped, fined and had their bikes impounded, and the joker mechanic who safety certified them lost his licence?

All regular motorcyclists know that there is a not so fine line between being heard by other road users and simply needing to compensate for what little manhood God actually blessed you with.

Joseph Bondi Helmets or Bike Paths Since the September 29 Sydney Morning Herald article about the Dutch bike infrastructure expert who was praising the plans for bike paths in the Sydney centre, seven letters have been printed.

Only two have talked of the issue around why this city is considered one of the most dangerous for cycling because of the current lack of an integrated system of safe paths and the aggressive attitude of motor drivers. The other letters have focused solely on the issue of compulsory helmet wearing.

Helmet wearing would not be so necessary to save cyclists’ lives if the other issues were addressed.

And why is it that the majority of the ‘disposable’ hire bikes that are strewn around our streets, parks and beach areas no longer have a helmet for the user to don? Most riders seem to ignore the legal requirement with impunity. If a car hire company provided a vehicle without seat belts it would surely be prosecuted. The companies claim to track their bikes judiciously, clearly this is not the case.

Simon Bartlett Coogee Rodney the Rocket Dear Beast - With all the negative letters sent in to The Beast I thought I might throw in a ‘positive for the kids’ letter.

I noticed in mid-May this year the dismantling of a Waverley Park icon, the climbing rocket. It

had been welded shut for many years - I suspect little Johnny fell from one level to the next, prompting outrage from protective mothers.

Well, good news, playground punters: Rodney the Rocket, as I’ve nicknamed him, has been replaced with Rodney Mark II, and boy, oh boy, does it look thrilling!

If I wasn’t born mid last century I’d probably have a crack!

Tim Bondi Junction The Clovelly and Carrington Road Pocket Park I’m replying to the objections raised by ‘Lyn M’ to the soon to be built pocket park on the corner of Carrington and Clovelly Roads (Pocket Parks, Monthly Mailbag, The Beast, September 2023).

The Clovelly Road slipway is dangerous, and drivers reverse parking there are always fearful that a car will run into their rear. Cars hurtle left up Clovelly Road around into the slip way at 50km/h. Pedestrians are often forced to jump out of the way of cars speeding through the slipway.

This park also gives the chance to remedy the camber on Carrington Road on the southeast side, which forces cars into the cars parked on their left. There are many accidents in this spot, in particular on rainy days when vehicles are written off by cars sliding into them.

The question of high traffic is overrated. There is never that much traffic coming up Clovelly Road, and mostly it is going west, neither turning north or south.

This will slow the traffic down, which is a good outcome. Cars may take the many other routes available to travel east or west.

Finally, the park has not been developed primarily for the use of children. There will be no playgrounds. This is a park that can be used by the elderly in particular, resting on walks to the shops or the bus stops - a quieter place to stop and reflect amongst the busy surrounds of shops, cars, bikes, dogs and people rushing around the streets and footpaths.

Lindy Morrison Clovelly

20 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

Waverley Bowlo Blues Dear Editor - I refer to the rant from ‘Anthony of Bondi’ in the last edition of The Beast regarding the Waverley Bowling Club (Waverley Bowlo, Monthly Mailbag, The Beast, November 2023).

I’ll declare my membership of Easts club, but otherwise say that I don’t bowl and have no connection with the new development.

Unlike Anthony, who raves from the outside in, I have visited the property, I have eaten at the restaurant and had a coffee at the café. Anthony admits that his whinge is based on a guess, which is strange as he is so adamant that he already dislikes everything about it. The restaurant is far from “some gentrified soulless Easts Leagues-style club”. What utter rubbish! Go look at it, Anthony, don’t guess.

The noise from clinking of bowling bowls is also rubbish. He may be right that the apartments above are not affordable housing, nor would they be in a quality development like this. He doesn’t need to imagine - it’s fact. He has no idea about build quality and double glazing but is sure, based again on a guess, that residents “won’t want any kind of noise down below”. I assume that he has full knowledge of this outlandish statement from careful personal research. Regarding the installation of the greens, it is my understanding that one is synthetic and the other will be a championship standard lawn green.

Anthony’s letter reads like a tirade based on envy; certainly on totally uninformed misinformation and just hot air. I suggest he goes there and judges it then.

The landscaping and grounds are magnificent and residents will surely enjoy this luxury lifestyle.

Sam Bondi Puzzling Crossword Hi James - I have enjoyed The Beast for years, noting how your articles, informative and entertaining, cleverly capture the Zeitgeist, encouraging us to pay attention to, even re-think, current topics and events.

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Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 21

Monthly Mailbag However, I feel a discomfort with the November 2023 edition Supercross clue, “Russian infested Balinese village,” implying that these people are vermin.

While in the same crossword “Saffa” for South Africans and “Seppo” for North Americans may pass as ‘humorously pejorative’, should we be signalling, even if meaning to be humorous, that it’s fine to speak of others in a way that lessens their, and our own, humanity?

Yours sincerely, Meredith Prager Bondi Beach Needs Versus Wants Dear Beast - Jeremy Ireland’s ‘Needs Versus Wants’ article offended me with his suggestion that nannies are in the “unnecessary” category alongside “fast cars” and “big houses” (Needs Versus Wants, The Beast, November 2023).

I’m a mum who has long employed nannies to help with childcare, primarily while I work or on occasion (heaven forbid)

to exercise or do something for myself, given my husband and I have no family support here. We truly value and appreciate the carers who have looked after our children and, while I appreciate we are lucky to be able to have this assistance, they are very much “necessary” for us.

I will be taking my time on choosing my ice cream, Jeremy.

Laura Clovelly Long time reader, first time letter writer Hilarious Roadworks Dear The Beast magazine - Is it just the aesthetics of a not-always grumpy older man that cause me to notice and despair at the roadworks carried out at the corner of Pine Lane and Hollywood Avenue near the heart of Bondi Junction (and right outside The Oscar tower)?

One would assume there has been some legitimate reason to dig up this little junction, but surely it could have been finished and surfaced more cohesively?

As it is, there are five strips traversing the ‘lane’, alternating concrete and bitumen with corresponding tones of light and dark. Then at either end of the original bitumen roadway there are two more. So, seven sections altogether.

I suppose whoever is responsible for it (the RTA, perhaps?) could jokingly claim it is an artistic zebra crossing, but one would need a very loose sense of humour to see anything funny here.

I wonder if anyone else thinks the same as me? Especially if you live in The Oscar on Hollywood Avenue or walk through Eora Park regularly. I suppose one can always cross the street somewhere else to avoid this eyeball assault!

Norman Bondi Junction ¢ Please send your feedback to letters@thebeast.com.au and include your name and suburb. We try and publish as many of them as possible, but nothing too crazy please.

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Local Artist Where can people see your work? Most of my art I share on Instagram, @wallacethegromit, and occasionally I’ll have some art available on my website, wallacethegromit.com.

Who are your artistic inspirations? There are so many great artists out there, but I draw a lot of inspiration from Reg Mombassa.

What are you working on at the moment? I just finished up on a towel design with my mate and fellow lifeguard Anthony Glick.

I’m keen to see a few of them on the beach this summer!

Do you have any exhibitions coming up? There are some things in the pipeline, so you’ll have to keep your eyes peeled!

Peace, Wally!

Local Artist...

Wallace Eggleton from Bronte Interview James Hutton Photo Chris Chapman Bronte artist Wallace Eggleton is the talent behind this month’s cover illustration of Santa surfing Bronte’s world famous bunker. He shares his local favourites with The Beast...

How long have you lived here?

I’ve lived in Bronte for about six years, although I recently made the move to the Inner West. I’m a Waverley lifeguard, and I was also the caretaker for Bronte Surf Club.

What's your favourite beach?

Clovelly on my day off, but I love working down at Tamarama.

What's your favourite eatery?

The Coop at Bronte does one of the best bacon and egg rolls.

Hot tip though: get the Vege Roll and add crispy bacon.

Where do you like to have a drink? Cafe Bikini on Hall Street in Bondi is fun for a drink... or two.

Best thing about the Eastern Suburbs? I know you’ve heard it before, but there’s really nowhere else in the world with pristine beaches like the Eastern Suburbs.

Worst thing about the Eastern Suburbs? The crowds. On a hot day this place is on another level.

How would you describe your art? I like to play around with a few different styles and mediums, but at the moment I mostly do digital art, like the cover. I try to keep it light-hearted with a cartoonish style throughout, while paying attention to particular details.

24 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

When did you discover you had a gift for your craft? Some of my drawings made the fridge, and a few found the bin, but it was always a good feeling when a drawing made the fridge.

Any other local artists to look out for? Ned Wieland, he’s a fashion icon.

Did you study art? Does year 12 art class count?

Any words of wisdom for young aspiring artists? I mean, not really, I barely even know what I’m doing most days!

What do you get up to on the weekends? An ideal day would be some sunshine and a swim, followed by a good feed and a beer.

Do you have a favourite quote?

“Feisty one you are!” - Will McKenzie Any other words of wisdom for readers of The Beast? Swim between the flags!

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FIND OUT MORE Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 25

Local News

Ridiculous Rent Hike Puts the Pressure on 90-Year-Old Bondi Bowling Club Words Anthony Maguire Photo Camilla Parker-Bowlo

Even better than Westfield.

Not Your Run-of-the-Mill Market Words Anthony Maguire Photo Reece Eikle Randwick’s Best Gift Market will be held again this summer at Coogee on December 3 - just in time for your early Christmas shopping. Showcasing local, handmade, sustainable and ethical products, the market will feature a sparkling array of stalls with artisans and designers selling environmentally friendly homewares, gifts and products from across the Eastern Suburbs and Sydney.

Unlike some of your more standard, run-of-the-mill markets, Randwick has gone out of its way to encourage local artisans, artists, producers and creatives to bring their sustainable goods along to tempt the early Christmas shopper.

It’s part of The Best Gift in the World campaign, which asks people to consider the environment when buying gifts and planning celebrations. This includes the sustainable and ethical sourcing of materials, whether they can be reused and whether they are recyclable.

Being a bit on the environmental side, Council has prepared a list of Christmas gift ideas that don’t cost the earth, from rainwater tanks, solar panels and chickens (not the cooked variety) to organic food boxes, car share membership and even charity gift ideas. And there’s much more that Santa would be happy to lug down your chimney for you, if that’s what suits your household.

So be sure to get along to Coogee Beach from 9am to 6pm on December 3 to join in the Christmas spirit. There will also be a beachside bargain sale, with lucky householders able to sell and upcycle their unwanted household goods and clothes so it can become someone else’s treasure. The day will be topped off with live local music and plenty of food, as well as a photo opportunity with Randwick’s very own singing Green Santa.

For more information, please visit www.randwick.nsw.gov.au and www.thebestgift.com.au.

26 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

Bondi Bowling Club may have to close down after the State Government announced a 420 per cent rent hike on the Crown-owned site.

“We’re at a loss as to how we can realistically meet these rent increases,” says Matty Graham, president of the 90-year-old club in Warners Avenue, North Bondi.

Waverley Mayor Paula Masselos is seeking an urgent meeting with the Minister for Lands and Property, Steven Kamper, to discuss the rent hike, part of a state-wide rent increase for properties located on Crown Land. Meanwhile, the council is looking at whether it can take over management of the site.

“It is not a wealthy club, and its options for revenue gathering are limited - it does not have poker machines and there is only so much they can charge for a schnitzel or a schooner of beer,” Mayor Masselos told The Beast.

“Other tenants on Crown land with commercial operations may have the ability to pay market rents, but our community bowlo is just not in a position to afford this.”

Bondi Bowlo is facing closure.

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Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 27

Local News

Wardy's Going to Give Thousands of Christmas Presents to Sick Kids - Again Words Christopher Kringle Photo James Hutton

Baker Park Courts will remain a free public facility.

Local Community Victorious in Fight Against Privatisation of Baker Park Tennis Courts Words and Photo Anthony Maguire Game, set and match! The local community has won a campaign to keep popular tennis courts in Coogee’s Baker Park out of private hands.

Late last year, Randwick City Council was toying with the idea of letting the Eastern Suburbs Tennis Club take over the running of Baker Park Tennis Courts. Users of the two courts started a petition, which claimed there would be a fee of $30 an hour if they were privatised.

One petitioner, Leah Kirwan, thundered, “These tennis courts belong to the people who use them. No business or club has a right to take that away or charge money!!!”

The petition on Change.org appears to have helped. At its meeting on October 24, Council agreed to keep to the present arrangement where the courts are a free public facility. A report tendered to the meeting noted that management of the courts by Council had “worked

well for nearly ten years since the Coogee Diggers withdrew from managing the tennis courts.”

The report acknowledged the impact of the petition, which has now gathered more than 1,200 names, and concluded that, “The takeover of the tennis court area right in the middle of the park will affect the community character of Baker Park.”

Councillors voted to retain the present arrangement, where the council maintains the courts. Players use them on an ‘honour’ system, where courts are handed over to the next players after one hour.

“If the courts were privatised you could have longer sessions, but most people are very happy with the present system,” Coogee resident Patrick Lyons told The Beast when we went to Baker Park Courts for this story.

Thank you, Randwick Council, for keeping this community resource in public hands.

28 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

For the sixteenth year running, Coogee personality and barbecue extraordinaire Mal Ward is going to drive a truckload of Christmas pressies up to both of Sydney’s children’s hospitals to brighten up the days of all the sick kids and their siblings.

The majority of us have never had the misfortune of spending Christmas in hospital, but others are not so fortunate. Wardy has endured more than his fair share of hospital Christmases, having spent many at the bedside of his son Johnno, who bravely battled childhood liver disease for nine years before losing the fight in 2008. Christmas Presents for Sick Kids is held annually in his memory.

If you’d like to donate a gift, please drop it in to the Coogee Bay Hotel’s Sea View Room from 1pm on Sunday, December 17. Write the age and gender that the gift is suited to on the present and place it under the tree. All presents will be delivered to The Sydney Children’s Hospitals at Randwick and Westmead the next day. Volunteers are also invited to hang around and help wrap presents.

For more information, please call Mal on 0414 293 396.

The real Santa .

Come along to your local Resident Precinct Meeting Precincts are meetings of residents who get together regularly to discuss local matters or issues of concern in their neighbourhood. Waverley is split into 13 Precincts and meetings are open to any person living within the Precinct boundaries.

This December, the following meetings are on: Bondi Beach – Monday 4 December, 7 – 8.30pm Bondi Heights – Monday 4 December, 7 – 9pm Bronte Beach – Wednesday 6 December, 7.30 – 9.30pm Visit waverley.nsw.gov.au/precinct to find out location of the above meetings closer to the date.

Not sure which Precinct you belong to?

Visit waverley.nsw.gov.au/findyourprecinct Waverley Council proudly supports resident run Precinct meetings.

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Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 29

Local News

A great loss to the community.

Vale Wichet Angkhawute

By Anthony Maguire Popular restauranteur Wichet Angkhawut has passed away after battling pancreatic cancer.

A notice on the door of Pinto Thong, the Thai eatery in Clovelly Road he founded in 1995 with partner Wandee, told the sad story of Wichet’s passing.

“Wichet was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer late July this year after the misdiagnosis of mild pancreatitis just months before… He fought with every ounce of bravery and willpower right to the end and passed peacefully surrounded by his family. He will be remembered dearly by us as a beloved husband and father.

He may also be remembered as a chatty local business owner, delivery driver, friend and neighbour.”

“Wichet loved the community dearly, and enjoyed talking to its many people from all walks of life whenever he got the chance.

Thank you to everyone that has added a slice of joy and love to his life.”

“The shop will be closed temporarily until our hearts are ready, as we only wish to cook and serve food with our whole heart.”

Have a Heart - Restore Kids’ Cardiac Services at Randwick

By Anthony Maguire The community has come out against a state government decision to end cardiac bypass surgery at Sydney Children’s Hospital, Randwick.

Randwick Mayor Philipa Veitch is writing a letter of protest to Health Minister Ryan Park, who has stated that children’s cardiac services will be centralised at Westmead. Meanwhile, a

petition calling for retention of the unit has attracted more than 8,000 supporters.

The petition was started by Debbie Issi, whose eight-yearold daughter Alexia owes her life to the cardiac surgical team at Sydney Children’s Hospital, Randwick. Struck with a severe influenza infection, she was placed in an induced coma and spent five days hooked up to a lung bypass machine which oxygenated blood from her heart.

“During that time, they told me to say goodbye to her twice,” Mrs Issi told The Beast.

“I feel devastated that the children’s cardiac unit is being closed and that kids could lose their lives if local treatment isn’t available.”

Waverley Council Launches Net Zero Alliance

By Dr Stephen Lightfoot, ACF Eastern Sydney When it comes to our planet’s changing climate, as they say in the classics, “Houston we have a problem.” No matter which way you look at it, the climate crisis is a pending disaster.

Like me, you might be concerned about the health implications of the crisis. You may be worried about the increasing severity and frequency of natural disasters. Or perhaps it’s the existential threat to the Great Barrier Reef and our iconic wildlife that keeps you up at night.

No matter your perspective, it’s clear that every aspect of our lives will be impacted by the changing climate. The problem can seem overwhelming and insurmountable, especially when viewed from the individual perspective, with many asking, “How can I make a difference?”

Well, the good news is that in Waverley you aren’t alone.

Recognising that we are all in this together, Waverley Council recently launched its Waverley Net Zero Alliance.

The Alliance aims to build a network of Waverley community groups and individuals who will work together to support Council as it strives to achieve its community-wide net zero target by 2035. Launching the Alliance,

30 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

Mayor Paula Masselos called for the Waverley community to join Council in making the necessary changes to the way we live, work and play in order to meet the Net Zero target.

Significantly, Marjorie O’Neill (Labor, Coogee), Kellie Sloane (Liberal, Vaucluse) and Allegra Spender (Independent, Wentworth) all signed on as foundation members, proving that climate change is now an issue that crosses political boundaries. Local community organisations such as the Australian Conservation Foundation (ACF) Eastern Sydney and Waverley’s Surf Lifesaving Clubs were well represented.

Larger organisations such as the Sydney Roosters and Easts Group also added their signatures to the Alliance’s founding document.

We cannot fix the climate crisis alone. It will be a much easier task if we work together in groups such as the Waverley Net Zero Alliance, sharing ideas and supporting each other as we seek to restore sanity to our climate.

No Need to Spend Christmas Alone, Afraid or Hungry

By Anthony Maguire Are you facing the prospect of spending Christmas Day alone?

Or maybe you know someone in that situation? Just rock up to Bondi Surf Club on Christmas Day, enjoy a free three-course lunch and take home a gift bag.

The Bondi Community Xmas Day Lunch was started in 2020 by lawyer and event producer Sebastian Cassie. Last year it hosted 450 guests and is expected to host up to 600 this year.

“Our aim is to provide a welcoming and safe space for the most vulnerable in our community, ensuring that no one has to spend Christmas alone, afraid or hungry,” says Mr Cassie.

Fresh ingredients are donated

by Harris Farm Markets and Woolworths Metro, with desserts provided by Pasticceria Papa.

Renowned chefs, volunteers and local charity Our Big Kitchen prepare the lunch. Gift bag sponsors include Original & Mineral Australia and Brown Sugar.

For more information, please email xmas@bondisurfclub.com.

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second nature Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 31

Crime News Steven Goldberg, 67, is charged with sexual intercourse without consent and sexual touching. He was allowed bail at Waverley Court on the condition he ceases practising until the matters are resolved. He will return to court in January.

Baggy handler.

Crime News Words Jimmy Felon Photo Al Kaloid Coogee Airport Worker Charged Over Huge Coke Haul An airport baggage handler living on the Eastern Beaches has landed in very hot water, accused of taking 100 kilos of cocaine off a plane and trying to get it through a security gate.

Darren Bragg, 61, of Coogee, stands accused alongside fellow-baggage handler Michael McPherson, of Mascot. The two were working for Qantas contractor Jets Transport Express when Australian Federal Police swooped just after they’d unloaded a plane that had come from Johannesburg. According to the AFP, they had transferred five bags containing the coke to a male accomplice in a waiting van. Officers stopped them at a security gate.

After the arrest of the baggage handlers and driver, two other men, from Hillsdale and Padstow, were arrested. All have been charged with importing a commercial quantity of a border-controlled drug and face long jail terms if convicted. The AFP says the seized cocaine had a street value of $40 million.

Massage Therapist Sex Charges A massage therapist has been charged with raping a 33-yearold female patient during a recent session at his Dover Heights clinic.

Pair Charged Over Gangster Murder Two more men have been charged with the murder of high-level criminal Alen Moradian in Bondi Junction.

They were arrested at Western Suburbs addresses on October 30, five weeks after the arrest of two other men. Moradian was shot in the carpark of an apartment block in Spring Street as he was about to drive to the gym.

Magistrate Bars Man From East After Flag Incident A tradie accused of threatening teenagers for displaying an Israeli flag on a car has been banned from most of the Eastern Suburbs.

Abdullah Al-Taay, 23, was charged with intimidation after allegedly making death threats against four teenage boys who were securing the flag to the back of a car in Bellevue Hill.

The teens were about to head off to a vigil in Dover Heights commemorating the lives lost in the Hamas attack on Israel. After footage of Al-Taay confronting them was posted on social media, he was arrested and charged. When he faced court, Magistrate Julie Huber told him he’d be breaching bail conditions if he entered the following suburbs, except for work: Bellevue Hill, Double Bay, Woollahra, Queens Park, Bondi Beach, Bondi Junction, Tamarama, Dover Heights, Rose Bay, Vaucluse, Watsons Bay and Randwick.

Caddick’s Auditors Taken to Court Upcoming civil proceedings are likely to throw light on why Dover Heights conwoman Melissa Caddick was able to get away with her deceptions for as long as she did. The case may also help victims of her $23 million-plus scam claw back more money.

32 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

Her victims have taken action against auditors who were hired

by Caddick between 2010 and 2020. They conducted annual returns on self-managed superannuation funds which were being plundered by Caddick.

The class action by 24 clients alleges that the auditors failed to detect documents forged by Caddick listing non-existent assets.

Caddick is believed to have hurled herself off a cliff in November 2020, the day after her web of deception unravelled with a raid on her home by officers from the Australian Securities and Investments Commission (ASIC). Three months later, her dismembered foot was discovered in a shoe washed up on a South Coast beach.

Her investors remain badly out of pocket after a sale of property yielded just a fraction of the funds she cheated them out of.

Car Crash Accountant Was Five Times Over Accountant Diana Schoolman was a staggering five times over the legal alcohol limit when she crashed her car into parked vehicles in Rose Bay, a court heard.

Police told the court that she had started drinking vodka and orange at her nearby home at 9am. The crash took place at around 1pm and a breath test revealed a reading of 0.251.

Schoolman pleaded guilty to high range drink driving. The court was told she has notched up three previous drink driving convictions in the past seven years. Her case was adjourned pending reports.

Ex-Boyfriend Let Snakes Loose - Police A man has been charged over the release of a pair of 2.5 metre pythons on a Coogee street.

Police say the snakes were deliberately set free on Mount Street after the 25-year-old broke up with his girlfriend, who kept them in her nearby flat. He has been charged with two counts of destroying or damaging property. The snakes, named Bagel and Mango, both remained at large as The Beast was going to press.

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Kieran's Satire

Not in our backyard.

Pool Pop Protests Planned Words Kieran Blake, kieranblakewriter.org Photo David Schwimmer Pool Pop heads a raft of protests designed to prevent outsiders from infiltrating the Eastern Suburbs this summer.

Loyal locals will pop the Pop Up Pools that are slated to appear in parks and playing grounds throughout the region, in order to protect our patch of paradise.

“Authorities want to make water activities accessible to everyone, not just those that live near a beach,” began a statement from Party Poppers.

“Therein lies the issue; we live in the East to avoid contact with ‘everyone’, and Pop Up Pools negate the central tenet of wealth and privilege.”

Party Poppers invite every man, woman and child to join their crusade to pop every pool before it is opened to the masses. They are united under the slogan, Not a Drop, Poppity Pop! Pop Up Pools are described as fancy kiddie pools, and protest leaders claim they can be easily popped with nothing more than a kitchen knife,

corkscrew, spearfishing gun or pitch fork. Organisers also guarantee the family-friendly protest will be enjoyable as well as constructive.

“Watching the water gush out of the pool is as satisfying as watching the Westies sulk home with deflated dreams.”

Two further proposals compound the threat to our livelihood.

Camp Cove residents risk being stripped of their parking privileges to compensate for the public works at Nielsen Park, and may be forced to share their private beach with everyone. This aligns with the mission to create Pop Up Pools so that families can enjoy a day in the water without having to reach into their pockets, to which the Camp Cove crew replied, “If you can’t pay, stay away.”

Locals believe the proposals are a direct consequence of previous government policy failures, including the BPass and the Westie Wall.

The BPass is the Bondi

36 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

Passport, a document issued only to verified members of the suburb’s inner sanctum who earned exclusive access to the best of Bondi. The BPass is no longer in use.

Also reported in this publication was the Westie Wall.

This broken promise was to be erected along the length of Anzac Parade to keep the Westies out west. In its stead lies the much-maligned South East Light Rail.

Without the Westie Wall and the BPass, anyone can enter the Eastern Suburbs, and the Pop Up Pools will give them more reason to do so.

Meanwhile, regional private schools have been asked to open their swimming pools to the public during the holiday period. The perturbed privateers spoke of the deep emotional trauma inflicted upon their children should they learn that hordes of untouchables had sullied their sacred waters, and declared, “Taxpayers fund our facilities, they don’t use them.”

Waverley Council Update Mayor's Message

Seasons greetings

infrastructure and streetscape upgrades this year including the Bondi Junction Cycleway and Streetscape Upgrade, and streetscape upgrades along Tamarama Marine Drive, Glenayr Avenue, North Bondi and Macpherson and St Thomas streets, Bronte.

For Council it’s been another bumper year, and my fellow councillors and I extend our thanks to the community for engaging with us as we’ve delivered some really important projects for the area.

There’s also lots happening in Waverley this holiday period.

On Wednesday 13 December, we invite you to bring your friends and family down to the fabulous Bondi Pavilion for Carols by the Sea from 4:30pm. It’s the perfect opportunity to pack a picnic dinner and settle in for an evening of entertainment in the Pavilion’s Dolphin Court.

Entertainment will include local young performers, Christmas carols, the fabulous Bondi Brass, craft activities, and of course a visit from Santa!

The Bondi Pavilion has really come into its own this year, delivering a full program of events for all ages. We’ve also been lucky to play a part in some fantastic long running events such as Sculpture by the Sea, City2Surf and our very own Festival of the Winds at Bondi Beach. We’ve also had the privilege of delivering some important

We also invite you to enter our Light Up Waverley festive lights competition. Light Up Waverley is open to all community members and there are six award categories to enter including best sustainable display. All you need to do is decorate your outdoor space - whether it's your front yard, balcony, window, school fence or store

As the year comes to a close, I’d like to take this opportunity to wish the Waverley community a merry Christmas and happy Hanukkah. This is a time to come together with family to reflect, connect, and unwind after a big year.

Ph: 9083 8000 | waverley.nsw.gov.au Stay in touch: waverley.nsw.gov.au/subscribe

front - for the chance to win one of six $250 gift cards. To find our more and enter, visit haveyoursay.waverley.nsw.go v.au/light-waverley Thank you to our sponsor Premium Solutions Group for helping make Light Up Waverley possible. Entries close 6pm, Sunday 10 December.

To ring in the new year, Dudley Page Reserve in Dover Heights is once again playing host to a celebration showcasing some of the best views of the harbour in Sydney. With live DJs, food stalls, and a licensed bar, bring your family and friends down to Dover Heights and enjoy the spectacular views with family and friends.

Tickets details are available on the Events page of our website waverley.nsw.gov.au.

I wish you and yours all the very best for the festive season. Have a safe and happy 2024, and I’ll be back with my next column in the new year.

Paula Masselos Mayor of Waverley

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The Unreliable Guide because I hadn’t practised. I covered it up with a joke, but I felt a fool! Save yourself that embarrassment and practise first.

Also, perhaps most importantly of all, are there spaces in your speech where you can breathe?

Breathing is highly underrated, but if you forget to do it things aren’t going to go well.

Martin had a dream.

The Unreliable Guide to...

Public Speaking Words Nat Shepherd Photo Bree Thin As you will be well aware if you’re a regular reader of this column, The Unreliable Guide recently had a debut novel, Bone Rites, published. While this is wildly exciting and highly gratifying after years of hard graft, it has also involved a ton of promotion and public speaking. Up until the last few months I was of the opinion, like many people, that I dreaded public speaking with all my heart and soul. But when I expressed this fear to my hairdresser (I know, the glamorous life I lead) she pointed out that nerves and excitement are the same thing - it just depends how you process that feeling.

So, I shifted my thinking.

Every time I thought about the upcoming events, instead of focusing on how terrified I was, I told myself I was looking forward to them. And you know what? It’s bloody well worked.

I’ve been relaxed, I’ve had an absolute ball and I’ve talked the book up a storm. Who knew I had it in me?

If you, like me, would rather have a root canal than engage in any form of public speaking, The

Unreliable Guide has some tips and tricks to help you shine.

Practise The old saying assures us that ‘practice makes perfect’. That’s not always true of course - I could practise ballroom dancing until my feet bled but I’d still have the grace of a newborn giraffe who hasn’t yet worked out which way their knees bend. But practising your speech before you deliver it makes sense. If you can’t bear to do it in front of anyone else yet, try recording yourself on your phone. When you play it back, imagine the voice belongs to someone else.

Listen carefully to how you sound. Do you need to add more energy and emotion or dial it down? Are you gabbling so fast no one will be able to understand a word, or speaking so slowly they’ll be falling asleep? Are you remembering to pause for effect occasionally? Reviewing your performance like this also allows you to check your pronunciation. Confession time: in one of my readings I had to say the word “sesamoids”. I got it wrong

38 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

On the Day Nerves can really build up as your performance draws nearer.

These are a few things I found helpful. First of all - get organised. Make sure you have ready all the resources, notes, props etc. that you might need. Go to bed at a good time the night before and do a guided meditation if you can’t sleep. Remember to eat a few hours before so your brain has energy. If you can, arrive at the performance space a bit early. Get familiar with the space, your chair, the podium, etc. If your stomach feels like a kaleidoscope of butterflies just hatched, tell yourself firmly that this sensation means excitement, not fear. You are ‘looking forward’ to public speaking, not ‘dreading it.’ In other words, fake it ’til you make it, baby. Visualise yourself performing the speech successfully and being congratulated afterwards. It sounds like hippy dippy claptrap, but it really does help. Practise mindful breathing every time you feel like your head is going to explode. A few deep breaths (in for four counts and out for six) really calms your whole system down. Quick shallow breathing reinforces your state of nerves, while slow deep breaths tell your peripatetic nervous system that there is no danger. Everything is under control, nothing to worry about here.

Finally, in this world of short attention spans, nothing matters for long. A few days after you’ve performed, no one will remember if you did brilliantly or made a total arse of it. So just relax, take a deep breath, and give it a go.

The latest from Randwick City Council about living in this great city

Randwick News Randwick Mayor Philipa Veitch

It’s a cliché, I know, but this year seems to have zoomed past – and here we are in December again.

It’s such a lovely time of year in Randwick City. The streets are decorated, music fills the air, and more and more people choose to hit the beaches and spend time outdoors.

It’s a time when we can all look forward to unwinding and taking some time out after the demands of a busy year.

Last summer, NSW recorded the most drownings on record. This year, I urge everyone to be safe at our beaches.

Please swim between the flags and follow the lifeguard’s advice. We’re now putting lifeguards at Little Bay Beach and Malabar Beach. Plus, we’re increasing water patrols with jet skis roaming from Malabar to Yarra Bay and Frenchmans Bay. We want everyone to have a fun day at the beach and go home safely.

As we get closer to the festive season, there’s lots happening across the City, including Coogee Carols taking place on Sunday 17 December. This year, the Matraville Carols are back at Barwon Park and they’ll take place on Saturday 9 December. I’ll be at both events and hope to see you there too.

I’d like to thank everyone who may be working over this period, especially to the front line workers who’ll be taking time away from family and friends to keep our community safe. Thank you.

To everyone in our community, I wish you peace, happiness and good health for the holiday season and for the new year ahead in 2024.

What’s On MON 4 DEC FINANCIAL FITNESS FOR SENIORS 10.30am – 12pm Lionel Bowen Library

WED 13 DEC MAKING MOSAIC TILES 10am – 12pm Lionel Bowen Library

FRI 15 DEC FLOWER POUNDING WORKSHOP: CHRISTMAS CARD EDITION 10 – 11.30am Lionel Bowen Library

SUN 17 DEC COOGEE CAROLS

6.30pm – 8.30pm Goldstein Reserve, Coogee

SUN 31 DEC COOGEE SPARKLES

9pm, Goldstein Reserve, Coogee

5 DEC – 16 JAN EXHIBITION: “X-POTENTIAL: YOUTH LIBRARY CREATIONS” Lionel Bowen Library

MON 17 JAN CREATING GRAPHIC NOVELS WITH STEPHEN KOK (12-18YOS) 2pm – 3pm Margaret Martin Library

Councillor Philipa Veitch Mayor of Randwick 1300 722 542 randwick.nsw.gov.au

Headnoise

Exploiting people's differences is always lucrative.

Birds of a Feather...

Words Jeremy Ireland Photo Theodor Geisel Children’s books can deliver a powerful message.

One such book for me was The Sneetches and Other Stories by Dr Seuss. I have a fond memory of sitting down with Dad while he read it to me.

As a young boy I kind of got its message, probably because Dad was a good storyteller, but now, as an adult, the many themes from this story resonate more than ever. At its core The Sneetches is about groups, in this case two groups, where one of these groups has it better than the other.

I recommend reading this short story to get the full gist of the message, but, in a nutshell, these tall, fluffy, yellow bird-like creatures called Sneetches all live on a beach. Some have green stars on their tummy and others don’t. The green star Sneetches consider themselves superior and carry on as such. The ‘plain belly’ Sneetches are sad and feel ostracised as they don’t have what the green star ones have. One day a man turns up with a weird contraption and tells the plain belly ones he can put a green star on their tummy for three bucks. Excitedly, they do it, expecting to now be included. No surprises here, but the original green star Sneetches don’t like this, so the man then tells the original green star ones he can take their stars off for ten bucks. They go around and around, stars on, stars off, until in the end all the Sneetches don’t know who is who or which original group they were from. Our man drives off laughing with a truck full of money.

It’s a happy, feel-good message in the end as the Sneetches put aside their differences and just get on as one group, but it does very simply outline what can happen when we are in a group, 40 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

whether we’re born into it or otherwise. There are many different types of groups usually involving a shared interest, fate, goals or identity. Often groups of people are tasked with making decisions. Some of these decisions are good, some are bad. It’s worth pointing out that groups are hard to avoid, and despite a group having good intent, sometimes the outcomes are not - think COVID rules, the introduction of the cane toad or even the CBD and South East Light Rail project.

For better or for worse, when we are in a group we leave ourselves open to being compared to other groups. This is not always a bad thing but it can lead to an uglier side, which we see in Dr Seuss’s story. Seuss presents a mini arms race between Sneetches in an effort for one group to remain special and superior to the other. It raises topics like discrimination, prejudice, equality, respect and friendship. It’s no doubt a warm and fuzzy ending, but imagine if these poor creatures just couldn’t work it out, what then? Well, group identity plays a major role. In a broad sense, group identity is primarily about how people feel about themselves, allowing one to be connected to others in a slice of society that can produce emotions ranging from pride to prejudgment.

They can be powerful emotions, often leading people to try and manage such emotions either from within the group or outside the group.

Group identification is usually based on social comparison and some kind of identifying process and, like our poor Sneetches, can lead to an ‘us versus them’ mentality. Unfortunately, in the extreme, war can break out between groups where people are prepared to fight and even die for the sake of their group identity, especially if one group is strong-arming another.

However, being part of a group is normally a good thing, if not necessary, and presents many advantages if done right. But it’s worth considering that being part of a group, no matter how large or small, does come with a set of cultural, religious and - most importantly - attitudinal expectations and can really go pear-shaped if it has totalitarianism tendencies or if we force one group to join another or split groups up. Sadly, in today’s world, where the plight of the individual is taking over from the collective, it is easy to see how it breaks down.

In the end the Sneetches got it right, “The day they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches. And no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches...”

Jeremy Ireland is a local psychotherapist.

Have you got a question? You can get in touch with Jeremy by calling 0400 420 042.

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Marjorie's Musings

The Waverley rocket is back!

Rocket Ships, Grazed Knees and Plenty of Fun Words Dr Marjorie O’Neill, Member for Coogee Photo Kim Jong Un It is exciting and uplifting to witness the recent installation of a new, bright and shiny rocket ship in Waverley Park.

A spirit of optimism has been generated among older local residents who remember fondly its 1960s predecessor, as well as the young, who, for the first time, will be able to engage in the magic of going into space.

The rocket and launch tower are part of an upgrade project jointly funded by the NSW Government through the NSW Public Spaces Legacy Program and Waverley Council. Still in construction, but with the rocket ship now installed, the new upgraded playground will feature activities for different ages such as slides, water play and rope climbing, and is due to open by the end of November.

The importance of this project should not be underestimated. It is about a lot more than just providing some equipment in a park. The new rocket is a modern interpretation of the park’s original structure

that was installed in the 1960s at the height of public excitement and fascination with the exploration of space. Generations of local families remember the old structure, and it is lovely to hear their recollections of imagination-fuelled adventures to and through space as astronauts (and sometimes as pirates, princesses, cowboys and other characters), with their new friends and siblings, watched on by loved ones now often departed.

The NSW Public Spaces Legacy Program is a significant investment in high quality public open space. In the East, this is very much needed as more and more locals find themselves raising children in apartments.

Our children were forced to spend a great deal of time indoors during COVID and it is a sad fact that they were deprived of critical social development activities. The Waverley rocket ship might be seen as a symbolic vehicle for moving away from COVID and having fun, while

42 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

building social interaction and community space. It feels good to know that public money is being spent on the provision of an attractive and interesting outdoor area that everyone will be able to enjoy free of charge.

For this generation’s young, and those to follow, the Waverley rocket ship will fire imagination and creativity, provide a focal point for inclusive play with old friends and new, as well as offering healthy outdoor activity. No doubt there will be some tears and spills, but hopefully not too many. Over the years, in our desire to protect the safety of our children, many of the more robust and physically challenging aspects of the playgrounds enjoyed by our parents have been replaced by arguably tamer and less engaging structures. Children’s safety must always come first, but it is comforting to know that there are nine Australian safety standards aimed at preventing playground injuries, and these of course apply to our public parks. It is also worth noting that most children’s injuries occur at home.

It’s important to strike a balance between protecting children from harm and allowing them to explore, learn and face age-appropriate challenges. Overprotecting children can reduce their ability to develop the skills needed to thrive in the face of difficult circumstances and to bounce back from adversity. Outdoor play can encourage children to take reasonable risks, make decisions and learn from their experiences, contributing to overall resilience.

Playgrounds offer more than fun, activity, social inclusion and even resilience building; they fuel our imagination and provide a source of lasting memories. To all those astronauts old and young, get ready for take-off!

Fishing Report

A textbook Sydney Harbour rat.

Sydney Harbour Silly Season Kicks Off Words Lewis Kennedy-Hunt Photo Charlotte Leedham There is no doubt that Sydney Harbour is a true urban fisherman’s paradise, an aquatic oasis where the rawness of nature meets the city buzz. But although the system is famous for boasting some 600 species of fish, perhaps the most prolific creature of all is the humble harbour-goer. It is around this time of year, as the days grow longer and the weather warmer, that the harbour experiences somewhat of a silly season. As the hoards of baitfish enter the system with the warming water, the crowds magically materialise and chaos ensues. An average day on the water consists of weaving through hoards of drunk backpackers at the boat ramp, dodging booze cruises and hydrofoil sailing boats, kayakers and SUPs before fishing a spot with twenty other boats.

Recently, the water temperature nudged the magic 18 degree

mark, and just like clockwork the harbour has come alive.

This early season the biggest biomass of tailor I’ve seen in the harbour in recent years has entered in plague proportions on a feeding frenzy. A recent session throwing metals led to at least fifty fish hitting the deck over just a two-hour session. Mixed in with the tailor are also salmon, which respond well to walk-thedog surface lures or soft plastics like Zman Jerk ShadZ. If you are anything like me however, catching tailor and salmon can only give you so much joy, and the prospect of catching a mighty kingfish, although more difficult, is infinitely more appealing.

Kings are the Formula 1 cars of the harbour and are exceptionally fun to catch, offering up an exhilarating fight regardless of the gear you’re using. This time of year the smaller ‘rat’ kingfish tend to come to the surface to feed on baitfish and jelly-prawns, offering up a great opportunity for the lure or fly fisho to get bent on a few. Although using live or fresh baits for kingfish is a tried and tested (and very effective) technique, there’s nothing quite like the thrill of watching a kingfish eat your lure before screaming off into the depths.

Recently my girlfriend Charlotte and I decided to brave some sub-par conditions for a little arvo session to test some new Tackle Tactics gear that I’d been recommended. The wind was howling out of the south and the sky was dark and stormy, but often the worst conditions for the angler are the best for the fish and that was precisely the case on this day. After noticing some nervous water in a particular bay, a school of fifty-odd kingfish materialised in a flash beneath the boat, and they were in an aggressive feeding mode. We both rushed to get our lures in the water, with packs of hungry kingfish swiping at them beneath the boat. In the end it was the old figure 8 technique that led to the undoing of the first caught

44 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

fish. This method involves making a figure 8 in the water with the tip of your rod while towing a lure a few centimetres behind.

The prominent bubble trail excited the king into eating the lure before stripping my spool as it charged off. When using light tackle for this sort of fishing there is no margin for error with your gear, but luckily my new setup knocked it over with ease.

With fish of this calibre you can use pretty light gear, having caught plenty of kings on 4lb line. But, as was healthily reminded to me when I sighted some bigger models closer to the metre mark swimming amongst the school of rats, there is always the chance of hooking a bigger fish, so slightly heavier gear is advised. I personally like to use 10-20lb gear when chasing harbour kings on lures, which I think strikes a good balance between a sporting fight and having enough grunt to manoeuvre a fish. As quickly as the kings appeared they seemed to disappear, leaving us with two fish boated after only a handful of casts.

Now that Charlotte has witnessed first-hand the screaming runs of a king and the excitement of a lure eat, she’s more primed than ever to catch her first one. The fishing should only improve over the coming months, and I hope to see more pelagics like bonito and mack tuna entering the harbour.

Thanks for reading and keep your eye out for my coming articles as I have some epic plans for this summer that should spark up some cracking stories!

Lewis's Arsenal Rod TT Black Mamba BMS701MH (7ft, 4-8kg) Reel Okuma ITX-4000H Line 15lb Platypus Pulse X4 braid, 20lb Platypus Stealth FC Fluorocarbon leader Lure 5 inch Zman Streakz (bubble gum), TT Headlockz 3/8oz 4/0 jighead

Tide Chart

December 2023 Tide Chart Numbers Bureau of Meteorology Tidal Centre Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Moons

Moon • New Quarter • First Moon • Full • Last Quarter 5 • 0304 1.21

Friday

Saturday

Sunday

1 0500 0.64 1135 1.75 1829 0.45

2 0027 1.20 0544 0.69 1216 1.66 1914 0.51

3 0115 1.18 0631 0.74 1300 1.58 2000 0.55

0829 0.80 1443 1.43 2138 0.58

6 0401 1.26 0937 0.80 1544 1.38 2226 0.57

7 0454 1.34 1047 0.77 1645 1.35 2310 0.55

8 0541 1.43 1151 0.70 1741 1.33 2350 0.53

9 0622 1.53 1246 0.62 1832 1.33

10 0029 0.52 0701 1.63 1335 0.53 1920 1.33

11 0106 0.51 0741 1.73 1420 0.44 2008 1.34

12 0146 0.50 0822 1.82 1505 0.36 2055 1.34

13 0228 0.50 0905 1.89 1550 0.30 2144 1.35

14 0313 0.50 0950 1.94 1637 0.27 2233 1.34

15 0400 0.51 1038 1.95 1727 0.26 2325 1.33

16 0452 0.52 1128 1.93 1818 0.27

17 0019 1.33 0547 0.55 1219 1.88 1912 0.30

18 0116 1.34 0647 0.58 1314 1.79 2006 0.34

19 0215 1.36 0752 0.61 1413 1.68 2100 0.38

20 0316 1.41 0901 0.63 1515 1.56 2153 0.41

21 0416 1.49 1016 0.63 1623 1.46 2245 0.44

22 0513 1.58 1133 0.59 1730 1.38 2333 0.47

23 0606 1.67 1243 0.52 1832 1.33

24 0022 0.49 0658 1.75 1343 0.45 1931 1.30

25 0108 0.52 0745 1.81 1435 0.39 2024 1.29

26 0153 0.53 0831 1.84 1520 0.36 2112 1.28

27 0237 0.55 0914 1.85 1602 0.35 2156 1.28

28 0318 0.56 0955 1.84 1642 0.37 2236 1.28

29 0359 0.58 1033 1.81 1719 0.40 2315 1.27

30 0439 0.60 1111 1.76 1756 0.43 2354 1.26

31 0519 0.63 1148 1.69 1832 0.47

4 0207 1.18 0726 0.77 1348 1.50 2049 0.57

• • •

CARE IN YOUR HOME

HOWEVER & WHENEVER YOU NEED Serving the Eastern Suburbs community for over 100 years

Contact Paula on 02 9356 0305 or enquiries@slc.org.au Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 45

Dana's Recipe

It's all about the crackle.

Porchetta With Peach, Feta and Prosciutto Stuffing Words Dana Sims Instagram @stone_and_twine Readers of this month’s edition of The Beast will not be disappointed with this delicious addition to the Christmas table.

The stuffing is a highlight, with flavours that truly complement the pork, as well as each other.

It goes without saying that the crackliest of skin is the ultimate goal for this beautiful roast. The pan juices will make yummy gravy, and roast potatoes and fresh beans are the perfect sides.

This Christmas recipe serves 4-6 people, the happiest of holidays to you all!

Ingredients 2.2kg pork loin and belly (scored, rolled and prepared with string by your butcher) Sea salt

Stuffing 2 yellow peaches, cut into a small dice 100gm Greek feta, crumbled 150gm thinly sliced prosciutto, cut into a small dice 10g fresh sage, finely chopped 10g fresh thyme, leaves picked 2½ cups sourdough breadcrumbs 1 tbsp lemon zest 2 tbsp olive oil ½ tsp ground black pepper ½ tsp sea salt Method 1. To achieve good crackle on the pork you must prepare the skin in advance. Pat dry and then salt the pork skin with a generous amount of salt and rub into the skin. Leave uncovered in the fridge overnight.

46 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

2. The following day, to make the stuffing, combine all ingredients in a large bowl and mix well.

3. For the pork, remove from the fridge approximately 3040 minutes before cooking.

Brush off excess salt and pat dry to draw out any remaining moisture.

4. Untie the string and lay the pork out flat with the skin side down.

5. Generously and evenly add the stuffing to the pork. Roll the pork back together and very firmly tie at even intervals with kitchen string.

6. With the remaining stuffing, place in a small baking dish and set aside. This will be served as extra stuffing with the roasted porchetta.

7. Preheat the oven to 250˚C. 8. Lightly oil the pork skin and apply more sea salt.

9. Place in a roasting tin and into the oven for 25 minutes.

Turn the oven down to 180˚C and roast for a further 1½ hours.

10. Half an hour before the pork is finished roasting, place the small baking dish of stuffing in the oven and cook for half an hour.

11. Remove the tray of stuffing and the porchetta from the oven and rest for 15 minutes before carving.

12. Serve with crunchy roast potatoes and lightly sauteed fresh green beans.

Dana Sims is a Sydneybased food and prop stylist who has grown up in the Eastern Suburbs and loves to create delicious food for entertaining and family.

She is inspired by the fresh produce we have access to in Sydney. For ideas, recipes and styling inspiration, check out her Instagram, @stone_and_twine.

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Beast Brainteasers

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ACROSS 1. Matilda who plays for Manchester City (4,6) 7. Type of computer abbr (1,1) 8. Nun (6) 9. Flowering Rhododendron (6) 10. Lift or move to a higher position (5) 11. Mimics a cocktail (8) 13. Organ in female reproductive system (5) 15. Island in Malay Archipelago (6) 17. National security organisation in Australia (4) 19. Another name for fish eggs (3) 20. Common name for infectious disease affecting the lungs abbr (1,1) 22. Physician who cares for women and babies abbr (1,1) 23. Small airship (5)

24. City in northern Syria (6) DOWN 1. Fruiting body of a fungus (8) 2. Swiss potato dish (5) 3. A person with whom one is friendly, despite a dislike or rivalry (7) 4. Shortened toilet (1,1) 5. Won best actress for La La Land (4,5) 6. Write in a careless way (6) 9. Moor a ship (6) 12. Atom with the same number of protons and electrons (7) 14. Go down a steep slope by holding on to a fastened rope (6) 16. Viking who became first ruler of Normandy (5) 18. “... , I did it again” (4) 21. New Zealand footy star (1,1,1)

Trivial Trivia Words Lisa Anderson Photo Wil Larcombe @willarcombe 1. What was the original purpose of the tiny pocket in jeans?

2. The Bishop of Rome is a title more commonly known as what?

3. What was the first Disney animated feature movie that was not based on an already existing story?

4. Before the Foo Fighters, Dave Grohl was the drummer for which band?

5. What sport can be played indoors or outdoors and combines elements of tennis, badminton and ping-pong?

6. Which vegetable was the first to be grown in space?

Glassy tubes.

48 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

7. What creature has no teeth or stomach, mates for life and is the only species where the male carries the unborn offspring?

8. What type of fish is Nemo?

9. Who gifted the Statue of Liberty to the United States?

10. Which three countries don’t use the metric system?

Reviews

ANGIE MCMAHON Light, Dark, Light Again Label Gracie Music Reviewer @aldothewriter Rating  Someone better alert R. L. Stine’s lawyers, because Angie McMahon is peddling goosebumps. A lot of metal bands have gone on about releasing “epic” albums this year, but in the end it took an unassuming singer-songwriter from Melbourne to drop the most monumental album of 2023. It is also one of the most relatable; I mean, who hasn’t drunk too much Fireball Whisky? If you can, I recommend you sit down with a more sensible drink - a bottle of fine red (not too fine, get a two for $30 deal) and devour both the bottle (literally) and Light, Dark, Light Again (metaphorically).

WINTERBOURNE Act of Disappearing

Label Island Records Reviewer @aldothewriter Rating 

Dumb Money Genre Drama, Comedy Reviewer Linda Heller-Salvador Dumb Money is an epic underdog story of David and Goliath proportions based on true events that inspired the 2001 book titled The Antisocial Network by Ben Mezrich and the documentary Eat The Rich: The GameStop Saga. The term ‘Dumb Money’ was coined by large hedge fund financial institutions to describe amateur investors, who they mockingly looked down upon.

When Keith Gill (Paul Dano), a softly spoken small-time financial analyst, posts his investment portfolio podcasts on a Reddit website, he is unaware of his potential influence and ability to create a bonfire of enthusiasm within his grassroots followers that ultimately sends the ultra-wealthy Wall Street elite into a frantic panic when they lose billions of dollars on the stock market.

Dumb Money may sound like a film about the callous world of high finance and stock markets but it also delivers an entertaining and heartfelt insight into the fortitude of people power and how, with tenacity, the everyday person can triumph over bullies.

Central Coast duo Winterbourne have certainly mastered the art of quirky indie pop. Act of Disappearing immediately transported me back to my early twenties, when I still wore ill-fitting band t-shirts and my head hadn’t grown into my ears yet.

I’m going to go out on a limb and guess they are massive musical nerds. Layers of instruments complement encyclopaedic song structures, with shades of The Beatles, Phoenix, and a healthy dollop of Simon and Garfunkel. It’s like sitting down to a table of musical hors d’oeuvres, sans the snooty waiter judging you for eating all the chorizo empanadas.

BLINK 182

One More Time…

Label Columbia Records Reviewer @aldothewriter Rating  The original band is back together, and in between some surprisingly solid pop punk they are still making dick jokes at fifty. But that’s okay; a Blink 182 album without some reference to self-pleasure would be like a disco without any creeps lingering in the corner. No one likes a long goodbye, and a few of these could have been B-Sides, but they sound like they are genuinely having fun and it is truly contagious. I found myself with a weird itch to slam a six pack through a funnel on first listen, which was an interesting Pavlovian response from my teenage years.

Issue 227 December 2023 The Beast 49

Beardy from Hell Aquarius Jan 21-Feb 19 You’ve had to deal with some pretty awful people lately, but take comfort in the fact that karma is coming for them.

Cancer Jun 22-Jul 22 You don’t really need half of the drugs you’re on, so stop taking them and let’s see what happens (maybe talk to your doctor first).

Pisces Feb 20-Mar 20 See if you can get this year’s Christmas shopping done without spending more on yourself than everyone else combined.

Leo Jul 23-Aug 22 The younger you try and make yourself look, the older you will actually appear, so just relax and enjoy being wrinkly.

Visions Beardy from Hell

Aries Mar 21-Apr 20 The benefits of mouthwash include so much more than just personal hygiene - everyone will be better off if you use it.

Virgo Aug 23-Sep 23 When it comes to time spent in the bathroom, your partner’s inefficiency and double standards will drive you completely insane.

Sagittarius Nov 23-Dec 21 By doing nothing, you’ve still made a conscious decision to do something, so don’t let anyone tell you that you’re indecisive.

Taurus Apr 21-May 21 Your high-pressure job will lead you to develop a new nervous twitch that makes everyone think you’re on drugs.

Libra Sep 24-Oct 23 Invest in some sexy underwear.

Opportunities are few and far between, so it’s crucial that you make a good first impression.

Capricorn Dec 22-Jan 20 It’s okay to tamper with a neighbour’s car if it helps them to be more respectful towards others in your street.

Gemini May 22-Jun 21 You’re well past the friend accumulation phase of your life, now it’s time to get rid of a few of the duds.

Scorpio Oct 24-Nov 22 It’s very important to consume plenty of fibre, but be careful not to overdo it and risk compromising the efficacy of your bumhole.

Star Signs

Trivial Trivia Solutions

Looking for a different VIEW on Life?

VIEW Clubs is a national women’s organisation supporting The Smith Family.

Women join VIEW to form lasting friendships and to support children experiencing disadvantage to make the most of their education and create better futures for themselves.

Sydney Eastern Suburbs VIEW Club is looking to welcome new members to their monthly meetings held every fourth Wednesday from 11am at Coogee Diggers, 2 Byron St, Coogee - with guest speaker followed by lunch.

Call Jan on 0422 922 095 Email nettiet@bigpond.com view.org.au 50 The Beast December 2023 Issue 227

1. To store pocket watches 2. The Pope 3. The Lion King 4. Nirvana 5. Pickleball 6. Potato 7. Seahorse 8. Clownfish 9. France 10. United States, Liberia, Myanmar 1

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Coogee Carols are coming!

17 December 2023 6.30 – 8.30pm nd

Fi

Goldstein Reserve Coogee Beach

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