Publisher: Mitch Talley Publisher’s Boss: Cindy Talley Founder: Robb Newman Founder’s Boss: Thia Newman Distribution: Eddie Ash, Mechelle Ballew, O. Myback Issue Graphic Design: Mitch Sept. 26, 2018 Talley, Cray Ola (c) 2018 The Best of Writers: Mitch Talley, the North Georgia Robb Newman, Thia Mountains, Inc. Newman, Lora Bunch, Raland Patterson, Kathi Editorial submissions Hill, Kathi Chastain, encouraged; send to bestofnorthgamountains@ John Shivers, Patricia Kovsky-Dotson, Ted yahoo.com or mail to 312 Double Tree Drive SE, Smith, Rebecca Strobl, Calhoun, GA 30701. Joe Cobb Crawford.
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To advertise or suggest a story idea, call Mitch Talley at 678-882-6741.
CHS Band Reunion Remembering long-time director Harold Summerville If you’ve been around Calhoun for long, then you are very familiar with the name of Harold Summerville. Harold, also known as “Stretch,” was director of the Calhoun High School Marching Band for more years than I can count. Once he retired from that post, he became known to kids around the country as “Santa.” He grew a white beard and began helping St. Nick in his role as “Santa Claus” at area malls. Now Doyal Edwards is organizing a Calhoun HIgh Band Reunion in remembrance of Mr. Summerville (as he was known to us students) on Friday, Oct. 26 at the CHS football game at Phil Reeve Stadium. A get-together is also planned for Saturday, Oct. 27 at Forum River Center in Rome, 301 Tribune St., featuring music by deejay Ricky Hall from Slick Rick and a catered
By MITCH TALLEY Publisher
meal by The Season Events. Alumni and friends are invited to eat and dance the night away from 5 to 11 p.m. If you’re interested in attending the reunion, be sure to RSVP by emailing doyaledwards58@gmail.com. In the meantime, be sure to check out our issue today, full of all the other fun events going on in the North Georgia Mountains!
Mitch
One of those days Have you ever had one of those days? You know, a day that might start out feeling good but then something bad happens and that leads to something else that leads to something else like falling dominoes. Of course you have. Nearly everybody has. And before you know it a good day is ruined, although sometimes all you can do is grin and bear it. I had a day like that in the 1960s when I was 16. It was a Saturday and I was looking forward to finishing helping my father at his garage/ junkyard because I had a hot date that night. Hot date? Does anyone even say that anymore? Anyway that afternoon when I tried to crank my car it wouldn't start. The car was a 1958 English Ford Prefect, an exceptional piece of British engineering. It was exceptional because it didn't have any oil leaks. But it was somewhat high maintenance, requiring minor adjustments about once a week to keep it running in top form. My father had a wrecker so he hooked it to the Prefect and we pulled it, in gear, and it started, although it shuddered and clanged like it was on its last legs. He quickly discovered the problem - the carburetor's lone jet had worked loose. So he fished it out of the bottom of the carburetor, put it back in place, and the car ran fine. But in pulling it off, the large metal hook on the end of the wrecker cable had punched a hole in the bottom of the radiator. That was the second domino. It was getting late, so I hurriedly removed the radiator and took it to a shop about 12 miles away, got it fixed, and raced home, put it back on, filled it with water, cleaned up, dressed up, and took off for my date. Little did I know that the third domino was falling. That little car ran the best it ever had. I even got it up to 65 mph, although it was downhill. Still, that was as close to its top speed of 71 mph that I ever got. But late that night as I neared our driveway it began to rumble and stutter. I pulled off to the side of the driveway and raised the hood. The exhaust manifold was glowing white! See, I in my haste had forgotten to "top off" the radiator - letting the engine warm up enough to open up the thermostat - so it was actually a little low on water. Over the course of the night it was enough to boil the radiator dry. I had burned the two inside exhaust valves, which required a valve job. But the date was great so I didn't feel too bad.
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By Ted Smith Marion T. "Ted" Smith is the author of a new book, “Life in the Park: A Novel.” It is available on Amazon and at Barnes & Noble.
If you are not the person involved, such events can be quite funny. Take for instance a story I read years ago about a man and his wife returning from vacation. They lived somewhere south of Cartersville and had been up North. I have been up North. It is not a bad place to visit but I wouldn't want to live there. They were in a pickup truck with a large camper on the back. As everyone knows who has ever been on vacation, when it ends you can't wait to get back home. So it was with this couple. The man had been driving for several hours when he got tired and sleepy. So they stopped and she took over. He got in the back and went to sleep. They were on U. S. 41, which in Cartersville has several red lights. The husband had been sleeping a while but woke up when he felt the truck stop. Thinking they had arrived home, he stepped to the back of the camper and opened the door. The light changed and she started forward at the same time, causing him to stumble out onto the road in his underwear. He yelled for her to stop, but she did not hear him and continued on her merry way. So there he was standing in the middle of the road in his skivvies. Luckily he encountered an understanding police officer, and after he stopped laughing he offered to take the man home. Meanwhile, his wife, thinking he was still asleep in the camper, had to make a bathroom stop. She pulled off the road at a gas station and parked on the side. As a result her husband did not see the truck when he passed by and went home. When he got there he was surprised that she was not there but could not unlock the house because his keys were in the truck. So he waited for her. When she arrived she was so shocked to see him standing on the front porch in his underwear that she drove the truck into the garage door! Every day that starts out badly doesn't turn into a domino day, however, which is important to remember. Once one morning I was walking from my office to a nearby drugstore to get a copy of the morning paper when a pigeon atop a two-story building pooped on my shoulder. I laughed because if a bird poops on you first thing in the morning that is probably the worst thing that will happen to you all day. And it was.
Victor Hugo: “He who opens a school door closes a prison.”
COLLEGE PREP GUIDE | STRATEGIES FOR SUCCESS
Overcoming Obstacles Y
ou might think the most daunting task during college is the initial process of being accepted. But college can present new obstacles you may not be prepared for. Follow some of the below advice to avoid being overcome by these common feelings. FINANCIAL DESPAIR When you’re facing the heavy workload from your college courses, the last thing you have time for is working a full-time job. If your situation requires an income during your time as a student, keep your eyes peeled for financial assistance programs. Schedule an appointment with the financial aid office to talk with an adviser to see which benefits you qualify for. If you must work while going to school, a great tip from the organization Mapping Your Future is to search for a job on campus as they are more flexible with students’ schedules. DON’T PROCRASTINATE If you are planning to take a small break between high school and college, you should realize the difficulties you may face once you’re ready to return. Not only will you be out of practice academically, you may also accumulate financial responsibilities which weren’t present after high school. These burdens may be drastic enough to demand you work full time while studying.
Before taking a break in between semesters, consider the struggles you will face when you are back in the classroom and plan accordingly.
POOR GRADES While you may have received exceptional grades throughout your high school career, college courses may be more difficult and
demanding. If you get a score on an exam or assignment you are unsatisfied with, it’s important to not let it get you down. Use it as a learning experience to teach
yourself how to prepare more efficiently in the future. Consider joining a study group or find a tutor if you continue to struggle with the class.
COLLEGE PREP GUIDE | MONEY
Saving for College E
arning a degree at the school of your dreams can come with exceptional costs. In addition to covering tuition and books, students are also responsible for paying for their daily lifestyle. If a paid scholarship isn’t in your cards, saving money before classes start can lessen the stress.
According to the America’s Debt Help Organization, the average borrower in college in 2017 is expected to carry more than $38,000 in student loan debt. Defaulting on a student loan can do crippling damage to your credit score, lessening your chances of landing your dream home or a new car. Save now so the bill left behind after graduation isn’t so intimidating.
UNEXPECTED COSTS You already know the staggering costs of tuition, books and housing while attending college, but there are a few expenses students forget. Don’t be left unprepared. Consider creating a list of the items you use daily and incorporate them into your budget while saving. Don’t forget the little supplies like hygiene products, cleaning
materials, regular car maintenance and parking. 529 PLAN One of the most efficient ways to save for college, according to the United States Securities and Exchange Commission, is to enroll in a 529 plan. Defined as a tax-advantaged savings plan designed to encourage saving for future college costs, there are two types
of 529 plans from which to choose: Prepaid tuition plans: This account allows a college saver to purchase units or credits at participating colleges and universities for future tuition and mandatory fees. Oftentimes, credits cannot be applied toward room and board. College savings plans: College savers open an investment account for the
beneficiary’s future tuition, mandatory fees and room and board. Speak with a professional about how to begin saving for your future education. For parents, it is never too early to start saving so your children can focus on their college careers rather than how they’ll afford it.
COLLEGE PREP GUIDE | GETTING AHEAD
Start a Business in College
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e have all seen the success stories from college dropouts who went on to be CEOs of gigantic companies. However, there are many business leaders who began promoting and developing their company while they were still hitting the books. There are many advantages to testing the waters while you’re still studying. For one, putting your ideas out to the world are less risky during college as the financial demands will be less before you have a mortgage or family. You’re also in a large group of community-minded people who are much easier to reach by promoting on social media, posting flyers in high-trafficked areas and word of mouth. GAIN REAL-WORLD EDUCATION A classroom is a great place to set the roots for your journey as an entrepreneur, however, you can only learn so much in that environment. Take what you’ve learned and put it to use in the real world to get a feel as to how people are responding. While in college, you also have access to professors who are knowledgeable in business. Consider having a discussion to determine which methods you use aren’t working and how to improve them. Don’t be discouraged if your first idea doesn’t take off – college is about trying new things and reaching different people. DON’T BE AFRAID OF FAILURE Each step you take towards introducing an epic business is in the right direction for your overall experience. Don’t be discouraged if your ideas don’t flourish. Instead, highlight your resume with your innovations and drive you used while starting a business in college.
COLLEGE PREP GUIDE | TIPS FOR HIGH SCHOOL SENIORS
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College Checklist
t is important to not procrastinate when it comes to beginning your college career. Staying ahead of the curve will ensure you have everything in place at the right time. Keep on track by following these tips provided by the National Association for College Admission Counseling. AUGUST – DECEMBER One of your first moves as a high school senior should be to register for the SATs if you didn’t complete it during your junior year, or you wish to retake the test and obtain a higher score. You will also benefit from sitting down with at trusted educator to ensure your college applications are being filled out correctly and you are on track to graduate. Senior year is also a great time to research as many schools as you can. Take advantage of local college fairs, representatives who visit your class and take tours of several campuses. OCTOBER Shortly after October 1, file your Free Application for Federal Student Aid. After about four weeks, you should receive your student aid report, which will reveal your eligibility for financial aid. If your desired college requires an essay, this is a good time to complete it, proofread it and re-proofread it. You should also research scholarship opportunities around this time; remember, the NACAC says you should never pay for scholarship information. NOVEMBER – JANUARY Now is the time to get our high school transcripts in order as every college you apply to will require a copy. You should also send out your early decision or early action applications during this time. It’s also important to organize your regular decision applications and financial aid forms as they are typically due in February. You may also register for a January SAT; it is considered the last one a college will consider while you’re a senior. FEBRUARY – MAY At this point, you’re on the downhill slope. Remain focused even after you receive an acceptance letter as your college will want to see a second-semester transcript. Most schools require a commitment or deposit no later than May 1, so make sure to get it in on time.
COLLEGE PREP GUIDE | SAFETY
E
Stay Safe On Campus
veryone deserves the right to feel safe while gaining an education, however, emergencies are bound to occur.
A great way to stay safe while walking on campus is to travel with a group, especially while it’s dark. According to the National Center for Educational Statistics, there were 27,000 reports of criminal incidents against persons and property on campus in 2014. If you must make a trip without the company of friends, it can be a good idea to arm yourself with pepper spray and a whistle. If you feel like you are threatened, making a scene can dissuade a potential assaulter into fleeing or draw attention from nearby help. PREPARE FOR DIFFERENT EMERGENCIES With so many people in one area, the risks of emergency situations are heightened on a college campus. When considering a school, try and talk to campus safe-
ty officials and familiarize yourself with proper protocols during threatening events. • Fire: According to the United States Fire Administration, an estimated 3,800 university housing fires occur each year in the United States. Eighty-eight percent are cooking fires. Whether you live on or off campus, FEMA recom-
mends knowing at least two different ways to leave any room in case of fire. • Weather emergency: Stay alert to the incoming weather to your area. In case of tornado or severe thunderstorm warning, know how to get to the safest area in the building you are in. Most colleges will have designated areas like basements or interior hallways.
• Active shooter: Unfortunately, this threat is becoming all too common in America. Your college will have a plan in place for this emergency. Most suggest locking or barricading doors if it is unsafe to leave the incident and to report to 911 with any information about the shooter’s whereabouts or injured people.
INQUIRE ABOUT AN ALERT SYSTEM Thanks to technology, college officials can send notifications to its entire student body when a threat is imminent. If your school is equipped with this function, ensure your phone number is registered so you’ll be informed of emergency situations.
COLLEGE PREP GUIDE | MAJOR DECISIONS
Community College or University
O
ne big decision a student must make before attending college is which type of school is right for them. Both community colleges and universities offer many positives and negatives, but which one will benefit someone depends on where they want to go with their career. For some, an associate degree from a community college is a stepping stone before transferring to a university to continue their education. Others take interest in a career which only requires a two-year degree, while some prefer to begin and end their college days at a university. ADMISSION REQUIREMENT DIFFERENCES A community college is typically much easier to get your foot in the door. While certain programs like nursing, law enforcement and engineering may have stricter admission requirements than other fields, usually someone who has graduated high school won’t have much trouble being accepted. Universities are much pickier about who they accept. For many, a potential student’s high school career is scrutinized, including grades, courses taken and a minimum score on ACT or SAT. The application process is much more involved, too. If you are having trouble getting accepted to a university right out of high school, don’t be discouraged. Community college can be your second chance to impress a higher-education
institution once you complete your courses. MAJOR DIFFERENCE IN COST Another huge difference you will notice is in tuition costs. According to a recent report by College Board, the annual cost to attend a community college is $3,440 for an in-district student. When attending a public university, this number rises to $9,410 annually for in-state students and $23,890 for out-ofstate students. Private universities average the steep price of $32,410 annually. For those who don’t qualify for financial aid or scholarships, community college is the route that makes most sense to their budgets. The two years give students the chance to save for the higher prices of a university. DIFFERENT DEGREES Those attending community college can obtain an associate degree or short-term certificates which train people for a specific career. A student can then decide to apply to a university to further their education or enter the workforce with their certification. Universities offer many more options as far as degrees — bachelor’s, master’s and doctoral programs are offered to make it possible for a student to gain their degree in the same setting.
their problems. We go into habits and routines and don’t acknowledge where things come from and the impact we have on the world. Meditation is important and being self-aware. The law of attraction is to attract and create what you want not to just accept what you see. I’m big on environmental issues also. The Earth is alive and crying out to us to listen. We are all connected, and everything we do matters. Lora: Was there a point you saw art as a need or something that you must do? Chris: Since I was a teenager I think I saw art in this way. It became an outlet to keep me grounded. I know it’s something I do well and I try to grow and self-improve. I know I can accomplish more and continue to grow in it. Lora: What or who has inspired you or does continue to inspire you? Chris: All the other artists and entrepreneurs out there are inspiring to me. A lot of people that are putting positive and inspirational stories out there who have come from nothing. Alex Gray is a famous artist from New York, Revolution is a band,
and Nahko and Medicine for the People are all inspirational people who are putting positive out into the world and there are many more. Lora: Where is a place that you would like to go to with your art that you have not yet been to? Chris: I would like to take it more worldwide. We have been touring all over America for about seven or eight years. I’m more focused on my deejay performances right now and would like to do Broadway or Vegas shows with the art and positive message I bring. Lora: What do you see for the future of your art? Chris: I see the deejay path as my future. The general philanthropy and raising money for charities with it. I want to take it to the next level and shine a light on the issues that need attention through my art. Lora: What is your favorite part of performing on stage with your art? Chris: In the moment the energy and the fact that I would not hesitate while creating it like I
Confucius: “Give a bowl of rice to a man and you will feed him for a day. Teach him how to grow his own rice and you will save his life.”
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really authentic. My mind began to whirl as it thought we should find some clothes for the occasion. Pretty soon I was skipping back out the highway to my house wondering what I might find to wear. Mama was busy doing something in the house and did not notice what I was doing. I flipped through the closet, but nothing suited me. Surprise! There toward the back of the closet was this beautiful navy blue dress with light splotches of colored flowers, which would make me so beautiful. As I began to look, I found that there was a hat, pocketbook and gloves to match. Oh, what luck! Underneath on the floor was a pair of navy blue shoes, but I could not get my big foot into them, and anyway I would never be able to walk in the woods in those high heels. Loaded and ready to go, I almost ran back out the highway with my loot! We had a wonderful afternoon playing all dressed up. Finally,
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it was time for me to go home. This time I walked slower with my stuff because I was tired from playing so long and doing all that housework. There I was with my arms full of clothes plodding along. If anyone passed they probably said, “That poor little girl is running away from home with all of her worldly possessions.” If I had known … If I had known what I was about to face, I would have run away from home! This time, Mama saw me coming but could not understand what I was carrying home from my friend’s house. As I got closer to the house, she figured it out! Now, if you knew my Mama, she was tall and thin which resulted in long hands and fingernails. I did not know she had seen me coming, but when I got there I got the message. After some angry words she threw into me with those long thin fingers. I got a “whooping” of my lifetime for something I thought there was nothing wrong in doing – but I got the message!
This was a very difficult day, but I learned some lessons I want to share with you. Number one, don't get near your Mama when she is mad if she has long fingers. Number two, when you are playing in the woods in your playhouse with all those rooms and furniture and a baby to go along with it, be satisfied, for if you aren't, when you get home your Mama will make you so satisfied about it until you will get the message and never do that again! I was old enough to have known better in doing what I did the night Daddy had the episode with his Sunday shoes, for by this time I was a young teenager full of giggles and laughter. In those days everybody had to be careful with their shoes for salaries were low and shoes were hard to find since they had been rationed during World War II. My Daddy like everyone else had a “good” pair of shoes which were called “Sunday shoes.” Not only were they for Sunday and special occasions, but Daddy had to wear
Anonymous: “I may not be there yet, but I’m closer than I was yesterday.”
dress clothes and shoes to work. One Saturday afternoon he came home from somewhere wearing his good shoes. In a quick decision he went out to the farm a few miles away. After being there awhile, he saw something that had to be done either in the muddy garden or the cow barn. To Daddy it was to get the job done, never thinking of his good shoes. When he came home about dark, he realized he had to do something about those filthy shoes. Thank goodness Mama hadn't seen them – yet! To get the mud (or whatever else) off, he ran them under water. When they were clean to his satisfaction he realized that water had gotten inside them as well as the outside had soaked in water, too. Now, what could he do when he realized that tomorrow was Sunday? This was before the day of small heaters, hair driers, etc. He thought his only recourse was to put them on low heat in the oven, and slowly they would dry and become good as new. After working at the farm he was tired and decided to stretch out on the bed while his shoes dried. Needless to say, he fell asleep while his shoes were still “curing.” I was coming up on the front porch about this time and saw my Mammaw sitting in a chair in the living room. About the time I opened the screen door to go in, I heard loud talking and fast move-
Theodore Roosevelt: “Believe you can and you are halfway there.”
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ments. All of a sudden Daddy came flying through the living room, barefoot and in his underwear. He flew by Mammaw so fast that all he noticed was the startled look on his mother-in-law's face! By this time, we began to smell something burning. How could this be his shoes for he had them in a low temp oven? Just as I ran into the kitchen, Daddy had opened the oven door and was taking his shoes out one at a time using a long spoon to keep from getting burned. He headed out the back door and dumped them on the back porch floor. I actually did not know what was happening until I got out on the porch and there they were. Sunday shoes as crisp as burned toast, smoldering on the floor. I know I should not have laughed, but I had never seen shoes burning with the toes turned up like pixie shoes. I was sorry for Daddy's situation, but the curled up shoes took first place in my mind and all I could do was giggle and laugh never being able to stop. I had two problems here. Not only had my daddy's shoes been burned into elf shoes, but I could not forget the look on Mammaw's face when I came through the door. Mammaw was a tiny little woman, but her eyes were bugged out like frog eyes. She had been combing her hair and putting it back on top of her head into a bun. In the middle of this, Daddy came streaking
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through and she dropped her hair down on her shoulders! I must not forget to mention her mouth was wide open. I had never seen Mammaw look so funny. What a night! Finally Daddy had had enough out of me, and on his way back to bed he told me to go out on the front porch till I could stop laughing. This I did, but he could hear me in the bedroom by the porch. Finally, I was invited to go out into the front yard. When I did, I was so ashamed of myself, but my teenage giggling had consumed me. I eventually went in the house. I could not go to bed until I took one more look at the elf shoes on the back porch! And, too, I wanted to see if the porch was on fire! I don't remember what Daddy did about his shoes on Sunday. I know he could not tell the Ration Board that he needed another pair of shoes because he had burned up his others. But like everybody did back in the day, he managed. Again, I learned some lessons from this episode, and I want to share them with Number one, don't ever laugh at your Daddy when he has turned his shoes into elf shoes. Number two, when you can't stop laughing, go further away than the front yard or that is when you will not have something to laugh about! Number three, always remember the look on your Mammaw's face, for there will never be another look like this for the rest of your life.
Aristotle: “The educated differ from the uneducated as much as the living differ from the dead.�
‘Acting’ like I was the Devil I was the Devil once, not devil with a lowercase "d" but the capital "D" Devil. But I was a bad Devil. It was the only time I ever tried acting. I was a member of the cast for plays my junior and senior years in high school. I was new to the play cast, a scrawny self-conscious kid whose previous extracurricular activities had been limited to one year on the track team, where I had definitely shown little potential, and a nascent interest in the school newspaper, which was partly due to my ability to type. I was the only boy in school who could because in those days only girls who planned to be future secretaries took typing. How quaint. Our wonderful faculty sponsor and director was a large woman in size and personality, and a serious thespian who had been condemned to high school hell. Her typical production was a three-act farce, some ludicrous murder mystery with a cast of bizarre characters led by an intrepid young man named Wilbur or something. During my junior year I believe, she actually put on a serious play, something like “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof,” and it bombed. Since her budget for plays depended on ticket sales, she immediately went back to the three-act farces. When she cast me as the Devil I don’t think she was typecasting, but you never know. In any case, I was a disaster. I had a bunch of funny lines, but my delivery was so bad, she could have put a wooden post on stage and tacked my dialogue to it and gotten the same effect. So, as all frustrated thespians do, I became stage manager on the next production, a part for which I was much better suited since you know I didn’t have to be on stage, or act. Being part of the cast of the plays had several benefits. One was that I got to go to the post production party. For a junior, being in the plays and going to the after party meant that I got to hang out socially with my fellow juniors as well as some of the seniors, and there were a couple that I found particularly interesting (girls, of course). One was this very pretty senior named Joan. She was very popular, too, and was on the homecoming court. After one after party, my friend Jimmy, later to be class president, drove six of us home, four guys and two girls including Joan. The other girl was let out at our first stop. As it turned out, given the route we had
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By Ted Smith
Marion T. "Ted" Smith is the author of a new book, “Life in the Park: A Novel.” It is available on Amazon and at Barnes & Noble. taken, we were on our way to her house, and there were four guys still in the car with her when she fell asleep in the back seat. She was adorable and vulnerable, and testosterone was definitely in the air, but we were good guys and didn’t try anything. But we did come up with an idea. When we got about a half mile from her house, on a two-lane asphalt country road, we pulled over and turned off the lights and engine. We sat there in the dark a moment, one beautiful senior girl fast asleep and four guys most definitely wide awake. Then I gently shook her arm. “Joan,” I said, “wake up. It’s time to go home now.” She woke up startled. She immediately assumed that she had slept for quite a while and had missed her curfew. She said, “Oh, no, my father will kill me,” or something to that effect, and almost before we could take a moment to enjoy our little joke, we were reassuring her that we were only playing a trick on her and that she still had 15 minutes to get home. My memory is vague, but I recall that she was not very reassured by what we told her, even though it proved true, and I wondered what kind of father she had. Later, she laughed about it. In my annual that year, she wrote: “I’ll never forget that night after the school play as long as I live! Thanks to you I had a ball!” Another great benefit of being a member of the play cast was that we got to go to the University of Georgia each spring to see a play. In the spring of my junior or senior year that play was Shakespeare’s “Henry IV, Part I.” In those days there was no interstate and no Highway 316 from Atlanta to Athens, so the trip was made on two-lane roads. And for some reason, we went by car and not by school bus. I was driving a car belonging to my English teacher, a dowdy old woman I liked, and Jimmy was driving his own car. Letting two high school
Unknown: “Sometimes you have to do what you don’t love, so that you can do what you love.”
boys drive was a fundamental error of judgment, of course, but this was a time before our culture became so litigious that every school activity has to pass the lawsuit sniff test. As we passed through little town after little town, Jimmy and I stayed close to each other, but sometimes the other two cars along with us in the caravan would fall behind. They really fell behind between Jefferson and Athens because the lure of the open road and light traffic led us both to speed up. Soon Jimmy was flying along at about 65, 70 miles per hour and I was right behind him. The teacher was sitting in the front seat with me, but between us was an attractive girl named Myra, a tall, thin, gawky redhead with a bobble head sort of like Audrey Hepburn.
I don’t know how the teacher could not know what was happening, but her car, which I believe was a Dodge Dart, had a large sloping instrument display and Myra put her notebook over the speedometer so she couldn’t see how fast we were going. The play was amazing. It was the first time I had ever seen any major theatrical production, much less Shakespeare, and even the antiquated language was not a barrier to enjoying the sheer spectacle of it. Late in the play, however, there is a scene in which a herald announces the arrival of the king. He only had a couple of lines, but he was as wooden as a fence post. He stood out like a zit on Marilyn Monroe’s nose. I felt an instant kinship.
Dr. Seuss: “You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. You are the guy who’ll decide where to go.”
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WORD WIZARDS OF WOW!
Don’t fall victim to the epidemic of misinterpretations created by spin doctors He would survive the disease. His perceived prognosis had simply been a mistake in comprehension. “My doctor tells me I got a communications disease.” Archie Bunker, sitcom star of the 1970s TV show All in the Family, had misinterpreted what his doctor said. But, he was confident he was bad sick and his ailment was related to communications. “C-o-m-m-u-n-i-c-a-b-l-e,” had been the doctor’s word. In the information age, we’re bombarded with cryptic words. Like Archie’s ailment, many are misinterpreted. Those misinterpretations cause faulty decision making. It’s an epidemic. Hollywood, social media and meager reading are not the only ones to blame. The culprit is more insidious. The pathology can be traced to an unheralded profession called the “spin doctor.” They’re paid big bucks to change people’s perception. They change the meaning of our words. Good and bad news are played down and fake stories are substituted. This practice is causing long standing truths to be treated as lies or “old wives tales.” The drama-addicted populace craves these salacious false fables. The spin doctor tells us our thoughts and beliefs are spot-on even when they’re nine million light-years from reality. He’s a charmer and beloved by many. Some affectionately describe him as one who could tell them to “Go to Hell” in such a manner that they could hardly wait to start their journey. His power of word wizardry doesn’t make him a slacker, he’s biased for action. He gets pumped by disparaging esteemed experts and learned professionals, insisting they’re just ordinary persons with erroneous opinions. He vows that only by including everyone’s “feelings” can a “real truth” be divined. These crowd pleasing platitudes work wonders on readers and listeners whose predisposition is already “don’t make me think.” The cerebral tools of logic and critical thinking are helpless against the charismatic magician when he makes his pitch. His followers entrust their thinking to him. This loved-by-all guy frustrates my sense of reality. Maybe it’s because I’m schooled in STEM—science, technology, engineer-
ing, math. I reason that spin doctors are agents of confusion. They confound evidence and propagate distorted facts. Still, to read or listen to his performance is crazy fun. An example of the best ever word wizardry was seen on a TV commercial. In the 1990s, Doritos, a snack food corporation, got into a little snafu. They had developed and briefly marketed a new low calorie snack food called “WOW.” Unfortunately the product was pulled from market shelves. With his finely spun words, the word wizard revealed why: “WOW” contains chemicals that cause “anal leakage.” That phrase “Anal Leakage” was brilliant! Never was an atrocity so heavenly and humorously described—positive, polite, nonharsh and all economically captured by just two words. Spin doctors create new words daily. Politically incorrect words are retired. Here are six examples of these creations:
By JOE COBB CRAWFORD
New Old "Senior citizen" “Sex care provider” “Reality challenged” “Metabolic overachiever” “Previously owned car” “Alternative facts”
old person prostitute insane fat used lies
These new words may have failed to enlighten Archie Bunker’s invincible ignorance, but not our U.S. society. Today, misinformed and poorly informed decisions remain rampant. What remedy will stop the epidemic? Try this: Read more, switch off social media and TV; listen carefully and become more informed on who sponsors the spin doctor’s pitch; stop snacking on “WOW!” Joe Cobb Crawford is a contributing writer for The Best of the North Georgia Mountains and self-publishes his books through The Poetry Company. He’s a native of Fannin County Georgia.
Dana Stewart Scott: “Learn as much as you can while you are young, since life becomes too busy later.”
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and rocks. The second step centers upon inspecting and shaking out the above mentioned clothing to ensure there are not any insects inside them or on them before putting them up. The final step involves using insect repellent on your clothing when working in areas where you suspect many of these spiders have made their permanent home. Now, we will discuss what signs and symptoms can be present with these bites. The common signs and symptoms of a black widow spider bite include minimal to sharp pain at bite site with swelling and redness, with one or two small fang marks. More serious symptoms can include muscle cramps, chills, fever, nausea, vomiting, sweating, and abdominal / chest / back pain, headache, severe high blood pressure, difficulty breathing or shock. The common signs and symptoms of a brown recluse spider bite include stinging and redness at the bite site, a blue or purple area surrounded by a whitish ring, and a large red outer ring. The more serious symptoms of the brown recluse caused bite include fever, nausea, vomiting, headache, abdominal pain, joint pain, overall weakness, rash and muscle cramping. These steps can be applied to being bitten by either type of spider. 1) Clean the bite area with soap and water. 2) Remove all jewelry as swelling of area will make removal later very difficult. 3) Apply ice to the
bite area to reduce swelling. 4) Seek emergency medical attention (911) immediately. Hopefully, the reader will take the time to investigate the suggested website, view the photos associated with this article and exercise caution when gardening, landscaping in the yard, working in the garage or hiking in our woods. nNew Life Solutions International (NLSI) is an educational company specializing in First Aid, CPR/AED, Wilderness First Aid Certification, Emergency Medical Services / Team Building Consulting and Motivational Speaking. NLSI seeks to arm individuals and organizations with strategies to conquer their toughest challenges and achieve their goals. Rebecca Strobl, founder and president of NLSI, has been in Fire and Emergency Medical Services as a volunteer serving her community for more than a decade. She is an EMT-Intermediate, Wilderness EMT, Registered Volunteer Firefighter, Advisor for Cherokee County Fire and Emergency Services Explorer Post 469 advisor and American Heart Association and ASHI Instructor. Chief Strobl was elected by her peers to become the first female fire chief in her volunteer fire department’s and Cherokee County’s history. Rebecca possesses more than 15 years of sales, teaching, team building, leadership and motivational speaking experience from her various roles in both corporate America and grassroots volunteerism. She loves being in the outdoors hiking, fishing or camping with her husband, Gary, of 17 years.
Thomas Edison: “When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this: You haven’t.”
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By JOE COBB CRAWFORD
E.V.s, DRONES, AND BEE’S KNEES “Yesterday, I thought maybe I didn’t know. Today, I know for a fact I don’t know.” -Delmer Smith, Somerset, Ky. May 13, 2017, 5 a.m. - Jabez, Ky. I’s settin’ ’ere on the front porch at Cracker Barrel when all ’at arcin’ ’n sparkin’ stuff commenced. You’d a thought it was 4th of July firecrackers goin’ off. Now, I know me somethin’ ’bout ’em firecrackers, ’cause ’ats the reason I ain’t got nary tip on my right pointin’ finger. But it weren’t July ’n it weren’t no firecrackers. What is was, was an ole boy got his wairs crossed with one of ’em ’lectric car battery chargers. E.V. charger ’ey call ’em. I recollect seein’ ’im ’at mornin’. He wheeled his fishin’ boat in chere just afore sunup. ’N he tried somethin’ ’at weren’t real smart; he waird his boat’s trollin’ battery to one of ’em E.V. chargers. Ye know ’ey’s got ’em now in ’bout all ’em Cracker Barrel parkin’ lots. Whew, Lordy! ’At didn’t work out a’tall. Not a’tall. When he did ’at … ’n the sparks started flyin’, … he looked like he’s Hulk Hogan ’raslin’ with ’at E.V. charger. Hands flailin’ ever which a way. He’s busier ’an a one-legged man buck dancin’ over at the Renfro Valley Barn Dance. He lighted up like a Christmas tree. All around him it flashed blue ’n orange ’n green like maybe when Moses seed the burnin’ bush. And it buzzed louder’n if somebody’d rocked a hornet’s nest. I never seed ’n heard such in all my 54 born years. Smoked up ’at parkin’ lot ’n it stunk bad. Smelt worse ’n a pot of collard greens boilin’. Huh! Ha … Kinder felt sorry for ’at ole boy. All ’at commotion in the mornin’ moonlight embarrassed ’im. He looked over one shoulder ’n
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’en t’other. Don’t thank he seed me. I’s settin’ ’ere in one of ’em rockin’ chairs. ’N ain’t nobody but me seed what he gone ’n did. I tried not to laugh, but it weren’t easy. Couldn’t stop snickerin’; my shoulders ’as jumpin’ like I’s ’flicted with the St. Vitus Jitters. But, I pulled my hat down ’n stiffened my shaky shoulders. Sat quiet as a church mouse ’tendin’ like I’s dosin’ ’n like I hadn’t seen nary a thang. When the smoke finally cleared, he stood stock still, dazed. For a minute he studied ’bout what he’d did. Then, grinnin’ like a possum, he ran around in circles, gatherin’ up the melted remains of his battery ’n wairs ’n flung ’em in his boat. Tail lights glowin’, he hightailed it out; took off, squealin’ tires out of ’at parkin’ lot like he’s on his way to Talladega. But now, I tell you one thang, there’s somethin’ that don’t jive ’bout ’em E.V. chargers in ’em Cracker Barrel parkin’ lots. When ’ey put ’em in over ’ere at Jabez, where I seed ’at ole boy nearly get ’lectricuted, I says to myself, ’em thangs are as useless as tits on a boar hog. Ain’t never nobody gonna use ’em thangs cause ain’t nobody ever drives a ’lectric car in here. ’N I’s right as rain. Since then, never been nobody use ’em ’cept ’at ole boy who tried to charge his trollin’ battery with one. ’At battery meltdown ’n ’em useless E.V. chargers set me ta studyin’ on somethin’ else. ’n I’ve studied hard on it for nigh on to two days. Now, I tell you one thang, ’ey’s another thang at ’em Cracker Barrels ’at don’t make a lick of sense. It’s the food. I mean, where does it all come from? Nowadays, since I went out on early retirement, I spend right smart of time at a bunch of ’em stores. At least twicet a week I’ll stop at one. When I go, I ain’t ’n no hurry since I retired with my bad back. So I gen’lly stay a spell. I’m either eatin’ or tryin’ to name all ’em thang-a-majigs and do-flitchies hangin’ ’ere from the ceilin’ ’n ’em signs on the walls ’n pictures over the fireplace. Sometimes—just like when ’at ole boy had his boat battery meltdown—I just sit around on the front porch playin’ checkers with myself. But, now, I tell you one thang: Never in all my lolly-gaggin’ hours spent at ’em Cracker Barrel stores have I ever seed any food or any
William Shakespeare: “The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.”
Pursue your
DREAM VACATION FAMILY FEATURES
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sk nearly any person about his or her dream trip and watch a smile appear as the perfect personal excursion is described. Now, ask why the trip has yet to happen, and time and money will be the likely culprits. The misconceived notions that may be holding you back from traveling can feel especially exacerbated during busy seasons when travel costs rise and coordinating vacation schedules with coworkers becomes a challenge. Carving out time and saving funds to make travel possible, even during the busiest travel seasons, can be a challenge. Lee Abbamonte, the youngest person to travel to every country in the world plus the North and South Poles, and Bank of America recommend these tips to travel the world in style.
Book Based on Your Interests One of the easiest ways to make time for travel is to book based on your likes and hobbies. When you plan a trip around your passions, it helps you prioritize the experience over the cost. “When I worked in finance, I noticed a lot of my colleagues made excuses about why they couldn’t travel,” Abbamonte said. “I’ve found that booking travel based on your personal interests can help you stay motivated to follow through actually taking the trip. For example, I love watching and playing sports, so I often use that as a reason to travel to various countries.” One area you might be passionate about is food. In fact, 23 percent of Americans say they have planned a trip around a culinary experience, according to a Bank of America survey. Local cuisine also offers a unique glimpse into a culture. “I love attending local food festivals and cultural celebrations,” Abbamonte said. “Just one day at a food or wine festival can give you a great understanding of an area’s culture and people, which is quite literally great ‘food for thought.’”
Have a Credit Card Rewards Strategy Earning points through travel spending is especially popular today. In fact, 65 percent of Americans have a rewards credit card, according to the same Bank of America survey. Yet when it comes time to reap a card’s rewards, 55 percent admit they don’t have a strategy to maximize points. Abbamonte recommends using a credit card that rewards all your purchases and offers extra points where you spend most. “Since traveling and eating out are easily my top two expenses, the Premium Rewards credit card from Bank of America works perfectly for my lifestyle,” Abbamonte said. “I earn two points for every dollar I spend on travel and dining – which works out great to maximize my rewards earnings, plus I earn 1 1/2 points on all of my other purchases.” For example, think of it this way: Every time you use your card, you are earning points for your next trip. Even your morning coffee can help you earn points toward a plane ticket.
Have a Plan but Be Flexible
To get the most out of your travel experience, make a general plan for what you want to do. However, be sure to leave time for exploring charming side streets and unexpected surprises. You never know what will catch your eye once you arrive. “I often visit multiple countries in one trip,” Abbamonte said. “While I usually know where I want to travel, I don’t always buy my flights between countries beforehand. You may want to adjust how you planned to allocate your time once you’re on a trip. Maybe you fall in love with a bed and breakfast, and just can’t part ways to catch your flight out of town. Travel shouldn’t be a mad dash from destination to destination. It’s a time to truly live your best life in a new place.”
Maximize Financial Rewards Some financial institutions offer banking rewards programs that can help you earn bonus points on your credit card rewards. Sometimes all it takes is a quick search to find out what benefits are waiting for you as a loyal customer.
Darwin Martin: “A teacher’s job is to take a bunch of live wires and see that they are well-grounded.”
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