Public Service Announcement
by Lorin Clarke @lorinimus
Somewhere, possibly near where you are right now, is someone you haven’t met yet who might just change your life. Possibly in a tiny way – by introducing you to a new flavour of tea or giving you a brilliant tip about the best way to poach eggs – or possibly in a huge way, like becoming a hilarious friend or helping you be the best version of yourself. Any person you say hi to when you pass them in the street could be miserable. You could be the only person they’ve spoken to all day. Small talk, which often feels insincere or pointless, can sometimes shift someone out of themselves in just the right way. Use your little bit part in other people’s life stories to inject a bit of kindness or humour or lightness. Or don’t. Just nod at them. Or say hello, using only your face. Last year, when the wonderful musical theatre genius Stephen Sondheim passed away, people noted that he was brilliant from a very early age and was lucky to be in the right place at the right time. He was born in just the right city for his skillset. He had the right friends, and the right family. Sure, he worked very hard, but there was a place where that kind of work was celebrated, and it was basically his doorstep. So here’s to the people who are born in the wrong town, and the wrong family. The geniuses living in poverty or held down by menial jobs. The imaginations that could think us all out of trouble if we only gave them a chance. Something we don’t get when we encounter other people while taking part in our own narrative arc is their perspective on us. We don’t see life through their
eyes. We don’t watch us walking towards them. We don’t assess ourselves through their lived experience. This is why it’s sometimes interesting to have those conversations with friends about their first impressions of you. They thought you were shy. They thought you were loud. They thought you thought they were an idiot. Rarely is a first impression entirely correct. Usually, the data people are using to build their impression is largely self-generated. In other words, it’s more about them than it is about you. For this reason, when you see someone in the supermarket and you think they’re looking at you with judgement or disdain, chances are there’s something going on that isn’t about you. I watched a woman becoming irritated with someone in a shop recently. “Are you right?” she demanded of another woman who was quite close to her elbow. The second woman, surprised, turned and apologised. Then she put her hand to her face and said, “Are you okay? Have I upset you?” Never have I seen the heat sizzle up and off a situation so fast. They were chatting together by the fruit and veg for ages. There is someone, somewhere, right now, writing some words that are going to change the way people think. There’s someone playing the opening notes of a song all of us are going to know this time next year but nobody’s heard yet. A discovery, in a lab maybe, or out in a field, or deep in the ocean, is probably taking place in some form right now. It might change your life, but you don’t know the person who thought of it. You will probably never know the person who thought of it. People can be truly terrible. We’re responsible for basically every problem, ever. But people are also wonderful, and surprising. Sometimes, wandering out into the world and coming across a brand-new human, even if only for a second, can serve as a useful reminder that our own lives centre the main character. Sometimes it’s good to zoom out, and borrow a few paragraphs from someone else’s story.
Lorin Clarke is a Melbourne-based writer. The second season of her radio series and podcast, The Fitzroy Diaries, is on ABC Radio National and the ABC Listen app now.
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hen inundated by media telling us to fear each other and science telling us to stay away from each other, feeling a bit misanthropic is fair enough. Maybe you don’t want to go out with your work friends. Maybe your family catch-ups are more stressful than they should be. Do your housemates leave things in the sink for days? Public Service Announcement: the world is full of other people. People you haven’t met yet. People you might not ever meet. Sometimes it’s good to remind yourself that if your life is a film, narrated by you, there are other films, other stories, happening all around you.
18 FEB 2022
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