Aging is full of surprises when it comes to our appearance

By Chris Roosa CONTRIBUTOR

My husband asked me the other day, “Can you believe that I’ve been retired 24 years already?”

Oh yeah! I could believe that. Twenty-four years, eight months and 14 hours to be exact – but who’s counting?

When the little ones still lived at home, ALL DAY LONG, I could put them down for a nap. In order to achieve my daily requirement of peace for my psyche, I needed that silence.

Then the Lord gave us blessed school! By the time the mischievous darlings returned home from their busy day, I could deal with them until bedtime or high school graduation – whichever came first.

However, with hubby home EVERY DAY now, he just drifts in and out of consciousness all day long. No rhyme or rhythm to his rest pattern. So, there is no escape!

I finally decided I would crawl into my cave, better known as a bedroom, for a daily nap. I just needed to recharge my batteries so I could repeatedly answer “What?” for the balance of the day because he won’t wear his hearing aids.

When we were younger, my husband was the best kisser. Now we approach one another like two calves sucking on an udder. It’s an old person kiss. Gone is the youthful passion, because our bellies just won’t let us get too close anymore. So, hence the puckering in the first place.

It’s a race, in this household, as to who is going to be bald first. The old man began losing his locks in his 60s but I’ve certainly caught up to him this year.

I wear my hair in a three-stranded, redand-white rooted ponytail coming from a

AGING from page 10SC shiny scalp. My scalp is now very prevalent so you can’t miss it. My bangs look like a wisp of fringe sticking out from my forehead. Surely you’ll recognize me when you see me around the community.

A few years ago, I realized that my long, lush lashes no longer existed. I had the individual lashes glued on. They looked pretty tht first day. Because of my restless nighttime thrashing, I’d wake up each morning with a good portion of my fake investment laying on my pillow. Lashes, lashes everywhere ... including my own.

Yep, they all vanished from my eyelids leaving me with no lashes at all. Then I’d have to invest in a product to get mine to grow back. I finally gave up on long, lush lashes and accept the stubs.

And the crepe skin! Did you ever notice how wrinkled and crepe-like older skin becomes? There was a time when I could show off my muscled arms from lifting 80-pound bales of hay each day. Now I can hardly open a new pickle jar because of the vacuum suction.

My lower torso was toned with muscular legs from many hours of horseback riding. My skin always had a lovely tan from all the hours spent outside with nature.

Today, it’s wrinkled crepe with brown age spots. Then there’s the color of our skin. Because my husband and I are both on blood thinners we bruise easily. His arms are a solid magenta from his biceps down. Mine are purple also but dotted with brown age spots from sun damage.

Anymore, when I have to fill out paperwork that asks me if I’m white, black, brown or other, I just put “other: PURPLE!” Let them figure that one out for themselves. A dermatologist would understand.

Mother never told me about this aging process. Of course, none of our parents lived this l-o-n-g! It’s been a real eye opener. I can hardly wait for the coming years to deteriorate even more. I’m sure Mother Nature has plenty of surprises in store for me.

Chris Roosa is a resident of Sun City Hilton Head.