2024 Spring Bulletin

This year’s Parents’ Association Benefit Leave It to Beavers II: Into the Beaververse was an unforgettable night for the community. p 12

Brearley is upping its wellness game to care for each and every student. p 14

Taking well-being to the next level

The 2024 Reunion Weekend brought back over 300 alums for celebrations, classes and speaker panels. p 18

THE BREARLEY SCHOOL

CARNEGIE HALL

How do you get to Carnegie Hall? By being part of the Middle and Upper School orchestras, of course! In February, our incredibly talented and hard-working musicians played in the world’s most famous concert venue. Conducted by Music Department Head Mr. Matthew Aiken, the orchestras wowed everyone in attendance with their musicality, their polish and their professionalism. You can catch them in a more “local” venue the next time they play the 590 Performance Hall.

Retiring Faculty and Staff, Alumnae Regional Events Recap, What’s on Your Desk?, Award Winners and more.

12 Brearley Benefit 2024: Leave It to Beavers II: Into the Beaververse

14 Brearley Takes Well-being to the Next Level

Division Updates on Health and Wellness Programming, Wellness Initiatives at a Glance and more.

18 Alumnae Weekend and Reunion 2024

Special thanks to Jennifer Bartoli, Marjorie Becker, Victoria Jackson, Jennifer Stewart, Carla Torres and members of the Brearley community for sharing photos and artwork with us.

Cover art by jozefmicic - stock.adobe.com

Head of School

Jane Foley Fried

Content Manager

Haley Swanson

Director of Graphic Design

Jennifer Bartoli

Director of Communications

Jennifer Stewart

If you have any questions or comments about the Bulletin, please contact Haley Swanson at hswanson@brearley.org or (212) 570-8588.

Brearley has offset the equivalent of 8,092,646 total standard pages of paper consumption by reforesting 971 standard trees since joining the PrintReleaf Exchange on August 7, 2018.

THE BREARLEY SCHOOL BOARD OF TRUSTEES

2023–2024

Modupe Akinola ’92, President

Susan Berresford ’61, Vice President

Sue Meng ’99, Secretary

Gideon Berger, Treasurer

Tara Abrahams

Alexander Brodsky

Ranika Cohen

Daphné Crespo-Helm

Thomas Farrell

Jane Foley Fried

Martha Haakmat

Ning Jin

Megan Lui ‘10

Katrina McCall

John McGinn

Margo Nederlander

Terri Seligman ‘78

Sidaya Moore Sherwood ’90

Bill Shutzer

Nekesa Straker ’97

Lita Tandon ’06

Olivia Wassenaar ’97

Lauren Wasson

Alan Yan

Trustees Emeriti

Christine Frankenhoff Alfaro ’91

Georges F. de Ménil

Evelyn Janover Halpert ’52

David T. Hamamoto

Stephanie J. Hull

Ellen Jewett ’77

Alan Jones

John F. Savarese

Priscilla M. Winn Barlow

Faculty Representative

Ann Saunders

Listening to Alumnae to Improve Our Students’ Experience

Letter from the Head of School

For the last decade, Brearley’s administration, faculty and staff have focused on teaching students the skills necessary to thrive not only in a rigorous liberal arts program but also in a diverse school community and a rapidly changing global society. It began in 2014 with our Strategic Plan, in which we embraced the dual and often dueling themes of “how to reconcile time-tested models with path-breaking innovation; the importance of instilling values— integrity and generosity of spirit—alongside intellectual passion and academic excellence; that an individual realizes her greatest potential when she challenges and understands herself fully as a person and as an active participant in a larger place and purpose; that girls—their educational requirements and their capacity for leadership—are both equal and special.”

We based these institutional priorities in large part on the experiences of our alumnae. As part of the planning process, we surveyed classes from the 1940s through 2013, asking about their time in and outside the classroom, as well as how well prepared they were for their transition to adult life, including college, careers and their ability to care for their health and well-being. While 96 percent of 808 respondents indicated that they were satisfied with Brearley’s academic program overall, they identified clear areas for improvement of the School. For example, only 38 percent were satisfied with the School’s health education, and 26 percent rated social/emotional education similarly. While 85 percent and 79 percent of respondents cited that Brearley helped them develop a strong work ethic and independence, respectively, only 28 percent cited Brearley’s role in helping them develop social skills and 17 percent in how to take care of themselves.

This was also the story I heard at alumnae gatherings and in one-on-one meetings in my first years at Brearley. The theme of creating a school that nurtured the mind, body and heart both inside and outside of the classroom was clearly delivered. And thus, we embraced the task of helping our students realize their greatest potential by challenging each girl to understand herself fully as a person and also as an active participant in a larger place and purpose. Brearley students are always reaching, climbing, seeking—and I love them for it. It’s part of what makes our school so special. But we know that attaining one’s goals is only part of the Brearley journey. My colleagues and I also want to provide our students with moments to reflect on the joy of their learning, their friendships and their emerging sense of self as they move from Lower to Middle to Upper School. Defining success for oneself is one of the essential

aspects of living a balanced, holistic and fulfilling life.

This idea is at the root of the Middle School program START (Success Through Affirmational Reflection Time), which Tim Brownell, Head of Middle School Student Life, and I developed in 2018 with Board of Trustees President Modupe Akinola ‘92 and her team at Columbia University. Our students’ sense of success is often shaped by others’ expectations, meaning they have an understanding of what adults in their lives want for them. We’ve found that when you initially ask students what success means to them, they immediately list achievements such as grades, leadership positions, athletic teams and so on and so forth. But when you ask them what makes them feel balanced, connected and confident, they cite their friendships, engaging in activities and often spending quality time with their families. And while stress can serve as a tool for some students (i.e., the push that helps them finish projects and develop new skills), for others, a lack of ability to identify and release that stress can be detrimental to maintaining their sense of equilibrium and being their “best selves.”

In the START program, we invite each Middle School student to develop her own meaning of success by asking her to consider the full range of experiences that are important in her life, and to identify moments when she is and is not at her best. Along with exposure to different types of meditation, this practice provides awareness of the many different experiences that make up her unique definition of success and the tools to take ownership of and seek fulfillment for herself through the decisions she makes. Setting goals for achievement is integral to life at Brearley. How one achieves those goals and grows from the inevitable ups and downs of early adolescence is also crucial. Our hope is that the process of learning, self-discovery and building resilience is just as important as the outcome.

At its core, the START program is about students having time to reflect on their own, and also to talk with and inspire one another to find balance in their lives and to recognize that they can take care of themselves and each other. But the program is not static. Each year, START has adapted to questions and concerns students raise. Last year, we integrated lessons from the Happiness Lab at Yale University, particularly the practices of prioritizing “time affluence” (having ample time in one’s day to accomplish goals) and making the most of one’s “time confetti” (the five or ten minutes of free time between tasks). This year, we’ve discussed what qualities make a class successful and how we can help develop them further.

continued on page 76

to Our Retiring Faculty and Staff

This year, we say farewell to five beloved members of the community who together have spent a 148 years at Brearley. We wish them well in their next chapter and will miss them dearly.

The Greek inventor Archimedes once said, “

” which translates to “Give me a place to stand and I shall move the earth.” JIM MULKIN has been a major force in moving Brearley’s earth for the past 20 years. Students present and past know he is the quintessence of an educator: He approaches all situations with an open mind, a seriousness of purpose and a desire to get it right; he is an intentional listener and, as such, a valued mentor and facilitator of the inevitable disagreements that arise in an intellectual community. Patient and understanding in his relationships with students, faculty and staff alike, Dr. Mulkin is devoted to fostering a challenging yet balanced and exciting curriculum.

In fact, as a leader of the academic program, he has invited the faculty to be part of institutional change time and again. The work academic departments have done to reinvestigate and expand Brearley’s course of study has been exemplary. Furthermore, Dr. Mulkin’s clarity of thought and practice of bringing many voices to the table has been foundational to changes in the schedule, as well as homework policies, evaluations, professional development and hiring policies. Through it all, he’s continued to work closely with students on their studies, department heads on nurturing their colleagues and advancing their curricula, and administrators in implementing strategic initiatives.

Dr. Mulkin first joined the Brearley community in 2003 as Head of the Classics Department, followed by interim Head of the Upper School and Associate Head for Academic Life. He’s also served on countless committees, been awarded the Excellence in Teaching Award and helped reimagine the 610 library as well as the 590 building. From teaching Latin in new and innovative ways, to reviving the School’s study of ancient Greek, to serving as a Middle School room teacher and Upper School grade head for the Classes of 2009 and 2012, Dr. Mulkin’s presence has been foundational to the Brearley of today. In all of his roles, he strove for equity, inclusion and fairness, and forged ahead with our institutional priorities. In short, Brearley will be forever changed by Dr. Mulkin’s many years of academic integrity, commitment to excellence and dedication.

ANNIE SPADER BYERLY has been teaching for 44 years, 27 of which were at Brearley. “I followed my daughter here,” she says, teaching kindergarten for four years before diving into a new position as Director of Kindergarten and Class I. She also taught reading through the Learning Skills Department, and created a curriculum still fundamental to Brearley today—the Respect and Responsibility curriculum. Mrs. Byerly has also served as a Lower School math specialist, Class III teacher and finally kindergarten teacher—a role she still loves today.

After such a lengthy, fulfilling career, it’s difficult for Mrs. Byerly to name what she’ll miss most about Brearley. “The kids, obviously,” she says, remembering girls long-graduated or now finishing Class XII. “Some of the parents have been particularly special, too,” she says. “And the people I’ve taught with, especially our kindergarten teams. That’s a super special relationship.” Put quite simply: There isn’t a corner of Brearley that hasn’t been changed by Mrs. Byerly’s steady presence and foundational teaching. “I could go on and on,” she says.

But for now, she plans to spend more time with her two daughters—Lily ‘08 teaches preschool downtown, and Maisy ‘11 lives in Minneapolis and raises Mrs. Byerly’s grandchickens—and puppy, Mr. Brown, who happens to be the best dog in the world.

PAUL BYRNES joined Brearley in 1986. He taught both chemistry and physics, and began the advanced physics program for Class XII. However, he’s also taught students as young as Class V, educating budding chemists and physicists at all levels. As soon as the School began their advising program, he signed up—and has been a guiding light for students ever since. Not to mention five rounds of grade head duties, working with the Brearley yearbook since 1991 and eventually coming on as yearbook advisor seven years ago. He’s also won various awards including the Weisman Award for Teaching Excellence and Class of 1992 Award for Teaching Excellence. Mr. Byrnes has chaperoned the Frost Valley trip 30 times. In short, he is a Brearley institution in and of himself.

And though he knows and loves the Brearley of today, Mr. Byrnes also fondly recalls, “Back in the old days, we had the carving station [in the cafeteria]. I really loved that.”

When asked what he’ll miss most about the Brearley of today, Mr. Byrnes of course cites both his colleagues and his students. “I love the kids. They challenged me, and they’re receptive to a lot of things.” Then he adds with a wry smile: “Sometimes they’re also annoying.” As for his retirement dreams, he loves to joke that his plan is simple: No grading and no writing recommendation letters. “Beyond that, I don’t know,” he says. He’s pioneering a Westchester arm for a tutoring company he freelances with, and perhaps will finally see Italy in the fall with his wife. “She’s been trying to get me to go for decades,” he says. “Maybe next year.”

MARSHA GOMEZ, Food Service Director, spent 31 years nourishing and strengthening the Brearley community. Marsha started as a temporary member of the dining services team hired through Brearley’s former food services consultant—before quickly rising to her current role. Over the past three decades, Marsha (and her wonderful team!) embodied nothing but warmth, hospitality and deep commitment to the well-being and joy of our community through orchestrating so many gatherings and celebrations. Marsha’s poignant reflections on the School and its students throughout the years speak perfectly to those tireless years of care and invaluable leadership:

“If you were to look into my mind’s eye, there would be a reel playing on Super 8 film like the old home movies. . . .Maria Zimmermann standing tall and graceful, coaxing her violin to set the mood at my very first faculty and staff holiday party. Warm, just-out-of-theoven ‘Joey’s Rolls,’ that in time became ‘Anthony’s Rolls,’ and how that glorious smell of freshly baked bread wafted up the stairwell to perfume the whole building with love. The bright orange carrot dressing that Wendy Russell made a salad bar staple and we still serve at alumnae luncheons. Peeking in on Mrs. Schmidt’s 1st grade class sitting cross-legged on the rug, their little faces looking up at her with pure focus and intent as she reads to them. Countless sidewalk conversations with parents, faculty and staff.”

“I hope to remain, as always, a member of this community. I am eternally grateful to have been a Brearley Girl.”

LORRE SNYDER has been a part of the Brearley community for 30 years (technically 32, leaving briefly in 1999 only to “of course come back two years later,” she says). Her roles have varied from Middle School physical education teacher to homeroom teacher to health teacher to badminton coach—just to name a few. Ms. Snyder has seen four Heads of School come and go, as well as taught more than a couple of daughters of her former students. “Brearley is a special place,” she says. “Each student is viewed as an individual, with unique needs and sets of circumstances. I have been so supported and respected here.”

She values her friendships with faculty and staff just as much as she does her relationships with generations of students. “I like to think we are all in it for the same reasons: love of kids, learning and of course teaching,” she says. “Coaching basketball is one of my fondest memories. I will miss the vibrancy of the Brearley community.”

As to what’s next? Ms. Snyder is in the midst of a master's program in therapeutic recreation at Southern Connecticut State University and wants to continue running adaptive sports programs and CPR training. “In my spare time, I plan to kayak and ride my bike, visit family and friends and tour NBA arenas with my basketball friends,” she says. And then: “This sounds tiring.”

Bubbles, Bites & Brearley Cheer

AN ALUM CELEBRATION

Alums ranging from the Class of 1957 to 2022 gathered for the second annual Alum Celebration presented by the Life after Brearley, Young Alum and Elder Committees of the Alumnae Association in December.

Literary World Panel

Presented by the Life after Brearley Committee, Zibby Owens ’94, Cherise Fisher ’90, Cindy Spiegel ’78 and Brooke Nagler ’16 shared their knowledge and expertise for navigating the literary world. The panel was followed by light bites and networking.

Navigating Elder Care Panel

On March 13, members of the Elders Committee shared their knowledge and experience for navigating the aging process, from housing to insurance, financial planning resources, emotional support and more. Moderated by Alumnae Association President Megan Lui ’10, the event attracted alums of all ages.

The Prom Reception

On February 2, Queerly Brearley hosted a preshow reception for LGBTQIA+ alums before the student performance of the musical The Prom

Art Muses Panel

On April 4, alums gathered at the home of Julie Satow ’92 for a panel on exploring a career in the arts. Julie Satow ‘92, Liza Burnett Fefferman ’92, Nix LoPinto ’14, Helen Handelman ’12 and Elisabeth Weed ’92 shared their respective stories on how they embarked on various careers in the arts.

WHAT’S ON YOUR DESK?

JODY KRAUSE, REGISTRAR

1. Calendar marked with rotational days (one of many) 2. Wooden caddy with highlighters (caddy crafted by Corinna Boylan ’11, daughter of Maria Zimmermann) 3. Ever-useful “Do this” Post-it 4. Small rulers for taming spreadsheets 5. Chick wearing paper “music” hat (it used to chirp, back in the day!) 6. Two vessels for writing implements—one for pens, one for pencils 7. Wonderboom speaker (charging) for use in my US voice class 8. Smarties candy (do they make me smarter?)

BREARLEY AT CARNEGIE HALL

Recently, Brearley music teachers Andy Kemp, Sam Katz and Reva Youngstein performed Gurre-Lieder by Arnold Schoenberg at Carnegie Hall, as part of the American Symphony, accompanied by a chorus.

COLLEGE WELCOME BACK

On January 10, college-aged alums were welcomed back to Brearley to reconnect and reminisce about their time at the School. A panel of alums presented to Class XI and Class XII on their transitions from Brearley to college.

10-YEAR REUNION ASSEMBLY

In honor of their 10-year reunion, Courtney Screen ’14, Rebecca Weng ’14, Rachel Goldstein ’14 and Sarah Ladouceur ’14 spoke to Upper School students about their different paths since leaving Brearley.

Martha Ryan Severens ’63

Nina Josefowitz ’68

Laura Foley ’75

Fernanda Eberstadt ’78

Jane Marla Robbins ‘61

BACK TO BREARLEY:

Hot Cocoa, Cookies and Feminist History

BOSTON, NOVEMBER 27

Joined by Head of School Jane Foley Fried and Director of Alumnae Relations Lizzy Youngling, Boston-based alums gathered at Grafton Street Pub and Grill in Cambridge, MA.

TEXAS, JANUARY 22

Director of Alumnae Relations Lizzy Youngling hosted Texas-based alums for dinner in Austin.

LONDON, MARCH 15

Li Ran ’97 opened her home to London-based alums for a gathering with Head of School Jane Foley Fried and Director of Advancement Phoebe Geer ’97.

SAN FRANCISCO, MARCH 21

Hosted by San Francisco Friends Head of School Pankti Sevak and Josie Rodberg ’99, both former Brearley faculty and Bay Area-based alums gathered to reconnect and reminisce.

LOS ANGELES, MARCH 23

Hosted by Deborah Ascheim ‘82, Los Angeles-based alums had an outdoor event in the California sunshine.

On January 25, alums had the opportunity to take a Brearley class again during a cozy evening in the new 610 library. History faculty member Ms. Katherine Bateman taught a condensed version of her feminist history elective.

Please send covers of your new books to classnotes@brearley.org.

Annik LaFarge ’78 Zibby Owens ’94

Elizabeth Nathan Saunders ’96

Eva Chen ’97

BOSTON

LONDON

SAN FRANCISCO

TEXAS

LOS ANGELES

Truth and Toil Award

Wilhelmina Martin Eaken ’64

Last spring, Wilhelmina Martin Eaken ’64 was named the Truth and Toil Award winner. The award annually recognizes a living alumna who has built a sense of connection across class years, embodies the values of Brearley and has had a significant influence on the community. On October 23, Mina’s family and friends, former colleagues, Head of School Jane Foley Fried, Chair of the Board of Trustees Modupe Akinola ‘92 and Alumnae Association President Megan Lui ‘10 gathered to celebrate this honor.

Mina, who is also a former Brearley parent, worked as Brearley’s Alumnae Director from 1991 to 2014. During her tenure, Mina helped establish various committees of the Alumnae Association, expanded the reunion program into a weekend of activities for the community, helped further develop alum online communications and created programs that offered networking and mentoring opportunities. Mina is a longstanding class agent, has served as reunion co-chair three times since she retired and is a member of the Lois Kahn Wallace Award Committee. Mina’s impressive knowledge of all alums makes her an invaluable member of the Brearley community.

Mina, we express our deepest gratitude and appreciation for your tireless efforts in bringing the Brearley community together.

FRD Award Ceremony

Amanda Eaken ’95 and Molly Rauch ’90

On January 8, Upper School and Middle School students celebrated the 2023 Frances Riker Davis Award winners, Molly Rauch ’90 and Amanda Eaken ‘95. Hosted by the BEAC co-chairs, the event informed students about Amanda’s education and career in sustainable urban planning, and Molly’s work in scientifically based activism, addressing environmental pollution and climate change.

NYAD SCREENING AND TALKBACK WITH ELIZABETH CHAI VASARHELYI ’96

Presented by Queerly Brearley and the Arts Committees of the Alumnae Association, alums and Upper School students joined Elizabeth Chai Vasarhelyi ’96 and the Film Club student co-chairs for a talkback and screening of Nyad. Directed by Chai and Jimmy Chin, Nyad chronicles the 64-year-old marathon swimmer Diana Nyad as she attempts to become the first person to swim from Cuba to Florida.

Alumnae Award Submissions

For submissions or questions, contact Lizzy Youngling at (212) 570-8616 or eyoungling@brearley.org.

Awardee scarf pattern designed by Brearley art teacher Rebeca Raney.

Thank You!

annual fund 2023–2024 school year

To our extraordinary community of alumnae, parents, parents of alumnae, faculty, staff and friends, we thank you for your generous philanthropic support. People are the heart of our school, and your Annual Giving contributions provide vital funding to meet core educational needs. Every gift makes a difference, and immediately impacts today’s and tomorrow’s Brearley students.

Brearley Fund

Unrestricted

Fueling all aspects of the educational program, your gifts will have a direct and immediate impact on purposeful teaching and expansive learning for today’s Brearley girls. Unrestricted gifts allow the School to maintain and enhance the caliber of the academic program by supporting the general operating budget, faculty and staff salaries and benefits, library books, healthy lunches, athletic equipment, art supplies, and all aspects of life at Brearley. Together, we are stewards for today’s and tomorrow’s Brearley girls.

u nited Fund

Diversity, Equity, Inclusion and Antiracism Initiatives

Embracing Brearley’s school song lyrics “By truth and toil united” and committed to building a more equitable school community, the United Fund empowers expanded programming in this priority area. Brearley is taking an all-encompassing approach to this work, with the goal of initiating meaningful and lasting change. We are dedicated to creating an inclusive school where all Brearley students feel a sense of belonging.

Opening dOO rs Fund Scholarships

Ensuring that talented students from families of lower, middle and upper-middle incomes can access a Brearley education, your gifts provide tuition assistance for families with demonstrated need. Starting with a comprehensive tuition model that covers all essential school programs, Brearley offers robust financial aid, ranging from partial to full grants that include funding for additional school-related expenses, as needed. The generosity of annual donors and those who have endowed scholarships allows Brearley to enroll an economically diverse student body, Classes K–XII.

a dventur O us i ntellect Fund Faculty Support

Providing for the dedicated architects of the School’s educational program, your gifts benefit curricular development, departmental review, professional growth and faculty salaries. To advance the curriculum and enhance culturally competent pedagogy, we are furthering learning opportunities for our faculty by providing them with the resources and skills needed to grow as scholars, artists and educators. The School’s dedicated faculty cultivates the passionate exchange of ideas that is a hallmark of a Brearley classroom.

ANNUAL GIVING

online giving:

www.brearley.org/make-a-gift

Venmo: Brearley_af

via mail: The Brearley School 610 East 83rd Street New York, NY 10028

Attention: Development & Alumnae Relations

Contact:

Amina Holman, Annual Fund Director aholman@brearley.org (212) 570-8610

The 2024 Brearley Parents’ Association Benefit, Leave It to Beavers II: Into the Beaververse, was a smash hit! In a reprise of their standout 2014 benefit program, Brearley parents Tina Fey and Jeff Richmond presented a fantastic evening of music and comedy exclusively for the Brearley community at Jazz at Lincoln Center. The program featured a star-studded array of special guests, including Fred Armisen, Sara Bareilles, Rachel Dratch, Josh Groban and fellow Brearley parent Steve Martin, to name a few. The Brearley B-Naturals also performed, along with other student participants. A lively celebratory reception for our 1,200 guests followed the show.

We are sincerely grateful to Tina and Jeff for generously giving their time, talents and expertise to create this oneof-a-kind evening for our community. We also extend our thanks to benefit co-chairs Cory and Ed Nangle and Lilian and Scott Kim for their steady leadership of the event, and to the underwriting co-chairs and the Benefit Committee for their successful fundraising efforts. In addition to an unforgettable night for the community, the event raised $565,000 to support Brearley’s faculty and staff!

BREARLEY TAKES WELL-BEING TO THE NEXT LEVEL

Just as there is no one Brearley girl, it should come as no surprise that there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to our students’ health and wellness. Our new Strategic Vision, Stepping Through the Open Door, clearly articulates our objective to “enhance the program to teach integrity, courage and empathy, instill a sense of purpose and belonging, promote student wellness and further the School’s progress towards antibias/antiracism.” It is clear that our community needs age-appropriate and nuanced programming that focuses on physical and mental well-being as well as belonging in order to support our students.

Director of Counseling Services Karen Ezra sees each developmental—and academic—stage as requiring specific and

varying degrees of care. “Nurturing healthy, positive friendships is the primary wellness challenge in the younger classes,” she says. “As children are growing and developing, they are working on the building blocks of relationships. There’s a great deal of trial and error and the trajectory is not typically smooth.” By the time students make it to Middle School, everything changes yet again. “Friendships often go through transitions as interests diverge and peer relationships become more of a focus. Maintaining healthy self-esteem and positive identity development in the face of shifting friendships, peer pressure and social comparison (made worse by social media influences) can be challenging,” Dr. Ezra says, especially with Upper School fast approaching. “Finding balance is the biggest wellness challenge facing Upper School students given the rigorous academic environment, demanding extracurricular schedules, social dynamics and perceived expectations regarding college.”

Over the past few years, each division has taken intentional steps to develop and tailor its wellness programs and resources to meet the ever-changing needs of our students K-XII. The goal is for all members of our community to receive the support, tools and care they need to build a balanced and healthy life in school and beyond.

LOWER SCHOOL

SOCIAL-EMOTIONAL LEARNING

Healthy habits—not just for the body, but also for the mind—need to be established early on. Head of Brearley’s Lower School Maria Zimmerman feels the biggest wellness challenge facing this age group today is both social and emotional. “Since the pandemic, children are having a hard time learning how to be in community with each other,” she says. However, Brearley’s goal for every new student, from the moment she walks through the double doors of 590 for the first time to Last Day, is to be in community with other learners. This foundation starts in the Lower School, through multiple Brearley-specific buddy programs where Class K students are matched with an older “buddy” in Class II, as well as Class I with Class III, to help nurture and grow everyone’s sense of belonging to something larger than themselves.

Additionally, all Lower School instructors are trained in Responsive Classroom, an evidence-based approach to teaching that focuses on the strong link between academic success and social-emotional learning (SEL). This educational philosophy centers not just learning curricula, but also learning the skills and competencies needed for students to grow into balanced adults, such as self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship skills and responsible decision making. These values are also enforced through Brearley’s signature Respect and Responsibility program, which is a holistic character education for all students.

Brearley faculty and staff ensure Lower School students are well prepared to combat the challenges of today’s ever-changing culture, as the social and academic repercussions of social media and technology influence even the youngest of learners. “The use of technology has become the babysitter and the entertainment,” Ms. Zimmerman says. And while the Lower School is very selective in their use of technology—“We have a very judicious use of screens in the classroom, even with the teachers”—it’s

nearly impossible to avoid altogether. Brearley is working hard to combat social media’s negative impact alongside Lower School parents who understand the benefits of a strong partnership. “Everything is so quick in media,” Ms. Zimmerman says. “So kids want it all now. They want it yesterday. But immediate gratification isn’t Brearley’s driving message, which is instead one of academic and social perseverance.”

We teach each student independence and endurance as well as how to use her voice to ask for support when she needs it. The hope is for every Brearley girl to learn this balance is the key to a curious, creative and adventurous life.

MIDDLE SCHOOL

UNPLUGGING TO CONNECT

Will managing screen time ever be possible? Head of Brearley’s Middle School Student Life Tim Brownell is trying his best to make it so. Recently, he launched Unplug to Connect: ”An overall wellness theme to maximize the positive benefits of technology and minimize its distractions and negative impact.” The program featured a “digital fresh start” in January, when Middle School students were challenged to change just one aspect of their device use. “Whether [the behavior] was trying to read for pleasure more rather than scroll, not having their devices at bedtime or during meals, even coming up with a family contract for device use or deleting an app,” Mr. Brownell said. “We’re going to make it an annual tradition.” Over half of the Middle School participated to rave reviews: “I read a book before bed every night,” one student said. Another decided to restrict her YouTube use to weekends only, with multiple girls electing to delete certain apps from their phones.

Mr. Brownell and members of the Counseling Department have also brought in Sources of Strength, an organization devoted to teaching students help-seeking strategies, resiliency, healthy coping skills and developing a sense of belonging. This

peer-leadership program is “designed to proactively encourage a culture of positivity, recognizing what folks have at their disposal, within their community, and how we can uplift each other,” Mr. Brownell says. Thirty-seven members of Class VI and VII signed up to be peer leaders, meeting regularly with faculty and Sources of Strength advisors to implement mental health and belonging initiatives throughout the School. In the fall, the students put on a gratitude campaign, where Middle School students were encouraged to write thank you letters to faculty and staff. In the winter, their efforts shifted to relaxation strategies and stress management around exam time. At its core, Sources of Strength is a program where students help students, building not only a sense of community, but also a culture of shared wellness and care.

Ultimately the goal is to keep innovating and improving these programs as students—and their world—inevitably change. A survey called Authentic Connections was administered to Classes VI through VIII, which identified areas of focus for Brearley’s mental health and wellness programming moving forward, including sustaining healthy relationships and destigmatizing helpseeking behavior. Social media is a factor in this effort. Mr. Brownell and Middle School advisors and homeroom teachers will continue to educate students and families about device addiction. “A lot of students use various devices for positive social connections,” he says. “But, on the other hand, a small number of our discipline cases are related to students misusing the digital space.” Teaching kids healthy habits about how to interact with each other online goes beyond deleting a couple apps and putting the phone away before bed. “It’s also hard for adults [to monitor screen time]. They’re trying to navigate their own digital lives at the same time as supporting the young people around them.” Which means faculty, staff, alums and parents—we, as a community—need to work that much harder to unplug to connect for our future and present Brearley girls.

UPPER SCHOOL

CARING FOR MIND AND BODY

When it comes to students’ mental and physical wellness, Head of Upper School Student Life Betty Noel-Pierre is leading the charge. Last year, she ran a K-XII audit of everything from Brearley’s sexual health programming to digital initiatives and the advisory system. With Dr. Ezra’s help, Dr. Noel-Pierre hired a student wellness consultant who, she explains, continues to “examine things in more detail, meeting with the student life leaders and the Student Advisory Committee before making recommendations.”

Which is how the revamp of Brearley’s sexual health education program came about. Before, the curriculum was taught by various, albeit highly trained, faculty members. “Students didn’t necessarily love the fact that their English teacher would also teach them sex ed,” Dr. Noel-Pierre says. And so an adolescent sexual health expert was brought in to modernize and reimagine the program. “The students feel more comfortable this way,” says Dr. NoelPierre. “In fact, the latest feedback we got was one student saying to another, ‘I can’t be absent! I don’t want to miss sex ed class.’ That’s so special.”

The Upper School wellness program doesn’t stop there. They’re also working with violence prevention experts at Prepare Inc. who “taught a full day with Class IX in the spring and are coming back for several advisory periods,” Dr. Noel-Pierre says. It’s beyond important— especially in New York City—for students to feel safe in their surroundings. Prepare also worked with Class XII during a weeklong intensive focused on safety in college.

Brearley is also partnering with a suicide prevention organization, the Jed Foundation. The School began working with them last year, turning this year’s focus to surveying students and faculty. They provide recommendations not just on areas for potential growth in our programming, but also on legitimate resources for students struggling with mental health issues in varied but serious ways. The School is now creating a strategic plan which will continue our training of students and student-facing staff, so they recognize early warning signs of distress. The plan will also focus on building resilience and help-seeking behaviors.

One of the Upper School’s other initiatives involves working with REACH, a program devoted exclusively to teaching and supporting students of color as they navigate through the academic and social world, enforcing values of strength and a

resilience perspective. Student groups are led by Brearley counselor Erica MuñozGonzalez and REACH specialist Dr. Ryan DeLapp, with the first cohort completing Brearley’s pilot semester last fall.

“It’s hard to pinpoint one thing,” Dr. Noel-Pierre says when asked about the greatest challenge facing Upper School students today. “Our students put a lot of pressure on themselves to do well. That doesn’t necessarily have to be a mental health challenge; students can learn to manage their goals and ambitions.” Navigating life as a teenager in today’s turbulent world— not to mention getting one’s homework done on time, too—can feel, at times, impossible even to the most talented of Brearley girls. Dr. Noel-Pierre advises: “Some of [those pressures] are real and sometimes our students put more on themselves than necessary. We need to talk more about balance. How do we anticipate moments of high stress and have the tools necessary to work through it?” This struggle isn’t new to our students, but as always—they’re up for the challenge.

“…TO ENHANCE THE PROGRAM TO TEACH INTEGRITY, COURAGE AND EMPATHY, INSTILL A SENSE OF PURPOSE AND BELONGING, PROMOTE

AND FURTHER

WELLNESS INITATIVES AT A GLANCE

BREARLEY IS PARTNERING WITH A NUMBER OF LOCAL AND NATIONAL ORGANIZATIONS WITH WELL-KNOWN, PROVEN PROGRAMMING AROUND SUICIDE AND VIOLENCE PREVENTION, BUILDING RESILIENCY AMONG ADOLESCENTS AND PRE-ADOLESCENTS, AND MANAGING STRESS.

JED

The JED Foundation offers a comprehensive approach to mental health promotion and suicide prevention for high schools.

REACH

REACH stands for Racial, Ethnic, and Cultural Healing, a program that is all about promoting empowered coping skills among BIPOC (for Black, Indigenous and People of Color) youth and adults.

PREPARE

Leaders in innovative learning and social-emotional development agree that educating the whole child is key to current and future student success.

SOURCES OF STRENGTH

Sources of Strength is a best-practice youth mental health promotion and suicide prevention program designed to harness the power of peer social networks to create healthy norms and culture, ultimately preventing suicide, violence, bullying and substance misuse.

AUTHENTIC CONNECTIONS

Authentic Connections provides each school with a custom list of recommended focus areas to help them identify and prioritize next steps for promoting student wellness.

RESPONSIVE CLASSROOM

Responsive Classroom is an evidence-based approach to teaching that focuses on the strong link between academic success and social-emotional learning (SEL).

the brearley school 2024 alumnae weekend & reunion

From April 18 to 20, Brearley’s Alumnae Weekend and Reunion brought together alumnae from all around the globe!

This year’s program honored milestone reunion classes ending in 4 and 9. The three-day-long event kicked off with a special concert featuring world-renowned pianists and current parents, LUCILLE CHUNG AND ALESSIO BAX, who performed alongside students and music faculty members. Friday’s highlights included reunion favorites, the ALUMNAE LUNCHEON which featured the 25TH AND 50TH REUNION SPEECHES, followed by UP CLOSE WITH SCHOOL LEADERSHIP, where alums heard from leaders within the administration about the unveiling of the new Strategic Vision and renovation projects in the 610 schoolhouse. The weekend also included a STUDENT PANEL ON COMMUNITY SERVICE, TURBO TALKS and SCHOOLHOUSE TOURS led by current Upper School students. Head to the Brearley website to view the program recordings and photos.

We are incredibly grateful to Rebecca Bloom ’99 and Mina Mahmood ’15 for their leadership as reunion co-chairs, as well as to Megan Lui ’10, Alumnae Association President. A heartfelt thank you to everyone who joined us near and far. See you next year!

CLASSES REPRESENTED THIS YEAR 1949-2022 h h h

AN ALUM TRAVELED OVER 4,000 MILES TO JOIN FROM ROME! 330

RSVPs TO REUNION

h h h

CLASS WITH MOST ATTENDEES

2019

50TH REUNION

Members of the Class of 1974 with Head of School Jane Foley Fried.

50TH REUNION SPEECH

Amanda Brown, Class of 1974

In 1961, my parents received a letter from Ms. Carslake, the soft-spoken, elegant Head of Admissions, admitting me, not to kindergarten, but to what was called the Beginners’ Class at Brearley. The letter was dated February 14, and my mother always said it was the best valentine she ever got. And so, that September, with approximately 60 other five-year-olds, I embarked on the longest association I have ever had with any institution: the Brearley School. The tuition was $750.

For all of you younger than the 45th reunion, a lot of my memories will touch on aspects of Brearley life that will be completely unfamiliar, but to us they will resonate as if they were yesterday. This assembly hall, for instance, is where we had lunch in Lower School, sitting at painted wooden tables under the balcony.

The almost universal favorite lunch was creamed chicken, rice and peas, a menu that we would stir together into a stew like mass and gobble down quickly so that we could get seconds before the kitchen ran out. Starting in Middle School, we had milk lunch, a uniquely Brearley term for snacks at recess. We had little cards that we bought for $1 at the bursar’s office, with 20 little 5’s around the edges, and the women who manned the snack carts would punch out a 5 for each snack that we purchased. Before nutrition was a thing, snacks included a napkin full of Cheez-Its and a small bottle of Coke. I think there were apples and oranges, but I never purchased a single one. By senior year, we had the privilege of signing out to go to the deli on the corner of East End and 83rd Street, where our new building now stands, to buy Reese’s Cups or Hostess cupcakes, and with parental permission we were allowed to smoke in the cafeteria. While this seems absurd now, we grew up in a different time. I lived not far from here, on East 86th Street, and started walking to school by myself in Class II, and many of us were taking the public bus by Class IV. We wore our maroon blazers, which sported the large letters “BS” on the pocket, and toted our book bags, another Brearley invention—a large sack with a canvas drawstring closure. These bags tended to be so loaded down with books that we were stooped over from carrying them, and most

of us ended up having to do remedial posture exercises under the eagle eye of Ms. King.

One of my favorite classes was shop with Ms. Evans. Fifteen girls hammering and sawing at the same time, using jigsaws and vices to create whatever our imaginations ignited in us. I remember spending most of one year building a birdhouse. I used so much wood that it probably weighed at least 10 pounds. I thought it was a bluebird house, but it was probably more of a condo for condors, it was so bulky and heavy.

Lower School was also when the book Harriet the Spy was first published. Harriet lived and went to school in this neighborhood, and spied on unsuspecting neighbors, friends and strangers. Many of us started spying, writing our findings in our assignment books. The following year, the show Get Smart, about a bumbling spy, Agent 86, and his cool female counterpart, Agent 99, started on television, and we became Agents 86 and 99. Although I loved Harriet the Spy, I was not a fan of the library period in Lower School. Every week I would ask Ms. Roudebush why we didn’t have Nancy Drew books. She would look at me as if to say, “You should know the answer to that by now,” which I guess meant it was not considered literary enough, so I would bury myself in the Beverly Cleary section and reread all about Beezus and Ramona.

We came of age in the late 60s and early 70s, a tumultuous time in history. We were six when the Cuban missile crisis occurred, and we practiced the famous drills of putting our coats over our heads and getting under our desks to somehow protect us from nuclear blasts. The following year, Camelot ended, the Vietnam War started to ramp up and students became activists. I remember we needed parental permission in Class VIII to go on the Class IX bus to one of the many protests in Washington. Permission I was not granted, much to my dismay. We sat in assemblies where we heard about assassinations and Kent State. There was a cultural revolution going on, and like it or not, we had a front row seat. Here at 610, we were being taught that as smart young women, we could do anything, and we put it to the test. We were articulate, analytical, outspoken and highly energetic.

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There were very few male teachers back then: There was Mr. White, the head of the Music Department, who composed the music for “Truth and Toil”; there was Mr. Foote, who played the piano for Rhythms, a strange class where Ms. Anderson would ask us to become a toaster or an egg beater, and no one had a clue what we were supposed to do. There was Mr. Sachs, the weird French teacher, and last, there was Mr. Brainerd, a math teacher. Every September, I think we determined on day one whether a teacher would be able to control the class or not. This poor man didn’t have a chance. We completely took over, playing pranks, passing notes, hiding under his desk, calling him at home and in general making his life miserable. He left after teaching us. This may have influenced the administration’s decision that we would not be going on the annual 10th grade class trip to Washington, DC.

As the 60s challenged so much of what had been societal norms, many of the traditions here began to change to reflect the changing student body: We no longer sang hymns or said the Lord’s Prayer in Assembly, and at the end of Class VIII, it was decided that Upper Schoolers no longer had to wear the uniform. The awkward combo of a tunic with a skirt wrapped around it, which we would roll up to a micro-mini-length, was history. There was a store on Lexington Avenue, down near Bloomingdale’s, called the Different Drummer, which became our Urban Outfitter. They had the widest bell-bottoms with the most hip-hugging, low-rise pants in the city, and every pair smelled like pot.

In the world of education, choices were changing rapidly as both the all-male boarding schools and the Ivy League colleges were going coed. Many of our classmates opted out, and between Class VIII and Class X, we lost half of our class to boarding schools. The exodus created an atmosphere of tension and moodiness, as those who were leaving couldn’t wait to get out, and those of us who stayed felt left behind. The end of XII brought us together in two ways—the fun of writing the Last Day

songs, and our unanimous agreement that we couldn’t abide the School’s latest mandate, which was that we all had to wear the same dress to graduation. Drama ensued, we rebelled, and so there were two choices, but we hated both of them. Needless to say, we were ready to spread our wings. We became doctors, lawyers and bankers, but also professors and painters, poets and physicists.

At our 25th reunion, I had three daughters at Brearley. In 1st grade, they started bringing their lunch and staying later in the day. I asked my oldest, Anne, how she liked having lunch at school. She said “It’s great. I wish we could stay for dinner!” While I don’t think Jane Foley Fried wants to tackle that, it encapsulates what Brearley does: It ignites an excitement for learning and a thirst for more knowledge at a very young age, and to our advantage, makes it a lifelong pursuit. In our day, we couldn’t wait to get to school. We came early to play jacks on the floor of the lobby, or blitzkrieg on the terrace. We loved singing Christmas carols before the holidays and the deep voices of the Fathers’ Chorus at the Christmas assembly. We sat on window seats and daydreamed watching boats glide by on the East River. When my parents passed away, “Jerusalem” was sung at both of their services, a hymn that I learned here and still love.

Our class was nothing if not competitive. We were also catty and cliquish, characteristics of all adolescent girls. After 13 years, we needed new horizons, and we moved on, some of us determined not to return. But after 50 years, competition has turned to compassion, cliquishness to inclusiveness, and cattiness to comfort. We have experienced all that life can throw at us, and we have the wisdom that only comes with having lived this long. To my class, I want to say how proud I am of the girls we were at five, the brave young adults we were at graduation, and the incredible, impressive women we have become. I salute you all.

25TH REUNION

25TH REUNION SPEECH

Ibijokè Akinola-Michel, Class of 1999

My name is Ibijokè (formerly known as Jokè) Akinola-Michel. Yes, I was the little baby who was brought into Brearley as a social experiment a few years after my parents, Matthew and Funke Akinola, enrolled my sisters at the school. My mom and other mothers were asked to bring their babies to school, to teach students how to bathe babies and change diapers. Sadly, it took me having my first child to learn this crucial skill. But yes, that was my first experience at Brearley and I can’t tell you how meaningful it feels to be back.

This is a precious time. When I last stood here, I was delivering my graduation speech as class president. I recall asking everyone to heed my advice about wearing sunscreen. The importance of wearing sunscreen was the topic of a well-known commercial at the time. Looking back, I wonder if my younger self truly understood the breadth of experiences, challenges and opportunities that lay ahead. In a face-to-face conversation with my younger self, I can imagine saying, “Younger self, do you know all the other

things that you will need to do? Do you know all the things that you will want to do? Do you know all the things that you will get to do?”

Let’s go back in time for a moment to the summer after we all graduated from Brearley. Do you remember what you did? Where you were? I landed in Cairo with a small group of teenage students and mentors as part of a summer program. The hot air lulled me as I settled into a newfound comfort. I looked up at the Pyramids of Giza in the not-so-far-off distance against the backdrop of more recently built buildings. In that very moment, ancient and modern times coalesced in such an eerie and whimsical fashion that my existence seemed like a blip in the sequence of time. It humbled me.

Standing here today reminds me of that moment. There are aspects of Brearley that are the same and aspects of Brearley that are completely different from the way they were 25 years ago. Some students from back then are present. Some have passed away. I think about them, and

Members of the Class of 1999 at the Alumnae luncheon.

I think about how we used to travel through this space together. Now the portraits of Heads of School who walked the halls of 610 stand in a new building where Rehoboth Market once resided. No longer can you smell the aroma of Joey’s delectable hot rolls or eat three to five H&H bagels a day in the cafeteria (for better or for worse). Now the 10th floor houses a state-of-the-art library with a gorgeous view. It has the same cozy mystique as our previous library, but when you go there, please do not expect to use a microfiche or utilize the VCR to watch videos for research, which Ms. Cunningham was happy to guide us through in the past. She was so precious. There are also no longer opportunities for you to “take a break,” watching shows like Fawlty Towers on VHS tapes, which some of my classmates recently admitted to doing in the old library’s small room with lots of pillows. Those days are over.

(And now the younger people in this room are looking perplexed. What’s Fawlty Towers, you ask? British sitcom. I’m not going to go into it, but feel free to Google it later.)

Those days are over, and now we juxtapose the present with a past that now resides within us and rests within our collective consciousness. So what does our collective consciousness look like as the Class of 1999? To better understand this, I asked my classmates to complete a short survey. I have already referenced some of their responses, and I will continue to refer to the survey as the speech progresses. First let me paint a picture of our class past:

The late Artist Formerly Known as Prince knew what he was talking about when he sang “Party like it’s 1999.”

We lived our Brearley lives to fulfill the mission of celebrating the year when we would graduate from this prestigious institution, innovating, while navigating its various waves of challenge.

As Lower Schoolers, we benefited from the newly constructed play space on the 2nd floor, daring to fall off the jungle gym and rise again. Ms. Garrison cared for us during those years with the utmost wisdom and faith, nurturing the many facets of our identities. We were seen and heard, so much so that she happily acquiesced to our requests to put on an assembly. Among our dance routines, it was Cassandra Steed’s “Horse Dance” that outshined them all.

If this was a VHS tape, and not a speech, I would fast forward through our harrowing Middle School years, and simply state that, like you, we managed to get through them. Our fearless leader Ms. Wiegand, and several selfless teachers guided us along the way. (Shout-out to Mr.

Brownell, who has taken on that noble task.)

Then I would rewind the VHS tape to show evidence of how we became increasingly more innovative over time. In Middle School, when Brearley gave us one sex education chapter book, we each created a construction paper sleeve with a handwritten title to hide the original title, sparing us from the embarrassment of someone noticing what you were actually reading while you traversed these Upper East Side streets. Sex-ed these days—not just one book but much, much more! After making it through that class and many years of truth and toil, Brearley provided us with the best accommodations in the building: Room 12G, our senior pad. We decorated it with reckless abandon, posting psyche signs all over the walls. Every class party had pretzels, Entenmann’s chocolate chip cookies and Diet Coke. We played hard and we worked hard. People recognized our class as having a record number of students who were admitted to “certain schools.” Now we are a class that seems to realize that no one school could have fully prepared us for what we would face in the world. It was the people in School, in these hallowed halls of Brearley, that triumphantly began that task.

Brearley helped us wrestle with academic rigor at an early age. When we were drowning in the torrent of assignments, some of us had floats with exceptional teachers like Ms. Nedbal to buoy us up. Which other faculty members were particularly memorable to my classmates as revealed by my recent survey? Ms. Glick, Ms. Zazuri, Ms. Leonard, Ms. Von Huetz, Mr. Harrison, Dr. Seminara, Ms. Biran, Ms. Carpenter, Ms. Gomez, Ms. Marcus, Ms. Sagor, Ms. Taliaferro—the list goes on and on, including Ms. Scully, who always seemed to have as many Luden’s cough drops as we would need to get us through the day, cough or no cough. When asked to which adults in the building they felt most connected, the survey results included but were not limited to members of the food service team, classroom teachers, members of the security team, coaches and administrators, and spanned across teachers of various subjects areas who emphasized joy, balance, humor and care and saw potential in us that we could not always see in ourselves.

After all that care, what was in store for us in the greater world? I remember reading a short story that one of our Brearley English teachers had assigned to us called “Sonny’s Blues.” James Baldwin wrote it in 1957. It is told from the perspective of an algebra teacher as he grapples with his brother’s drug addiction and rehabilcontinued on next page

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itation. In the process, he also worries about the boys he teaches, describing them as “growing up with a rush, and their heads bumped against the low ceiling of their actual possibilities.” Boy did we rush forward at Brearley. We rushed forward through the tunnel of perceived excellence, analyzing, peer-editing and experimenting, but when we exited the tunnel, it was easy to see how Baldwin’s masterfully written story, though replete with incomparable adversity, could also resonate with us as Brearely students. It could resonate with classmates who initially felt as if they had intrinsic traits that Brearley honed to enable them to enter the world equipped with the knowledge and strength to overcome hardship and have what it takes to have it all. It could resonate with classmates as their heads bumped against the ceilings of the various types of constraints, like relationships issues and unanticipated health problems. When asked about aspects of life that my classmates wished they had learned more about while attending Brearley, some wished they’d been taught more life skills ranging from how to create a budget to how to talk to love interests. Others wished that they had been taught that “good grades aren’t as important as . . . accomplishing something.” Others would have liked to learn more about how to see beyond achievement, as well as how to manage the interplay of timing and goal setting in a world that can so readily rely on a variety of perceived factors to place boxes on possibilities. When asked how their priorities have changed since their time at Brearley, many classmates shared that they have transitioned from primarily being recipients of care to becoming caregivers, noting that “hot rolls seemed to be last on the list nowadays!” It is heartening to know that current Brearley students are learning the foundational social-emotional skills to prepare them for the type of care that they will need to receive and give.

Shifts in the focus of instruction at Brearley today that relate to caring for oneself and others do somewhat address dilemmas that I later faced as a working mother. One of my classmates stated that she wished Brearley had taught her “that women can have it all but not at the same time.” Which time would be the right time for our adventurous intellect to take precedence over raising our children? How would we handle the tradeoff of spending quality time with our children or other loved ones while wanting maybe to further our own education and broaden our opportunities?

These dilemmas arose, and in spite of them, there were many aspects of life that our Brearley experiences contin-

ued to prepare us to encounter. For instance, people expressed how their time at Brearley helped them strengthen their writing skills and fueled their confidence to speak boldly and pursue their goals. It also sparked their curiosity and creativity and provided them with proximity to the type of excellence that engendered humility within them.

With such humility, classmates also noted that living out the values embedded in our Brearley experiences during the 1980s and 90s led many of us to have service-oriented careers. But having service-oriented careers also called into question how much a current Brearley education would be aligned with our own experiences as students. It made my classmates ponder how accessible a Brearley education would be to their children. Additionally, there were questions about whether or not our children would have had access to the same range of human experiences now as we had then.

Einstein said, “It is not that I’m so smart, it is just that I stay with a problem longer.” Yes, Brearley taught us to stay with the problems longer and to lift one another up in the process, to rise above the ceiling of possibilities and endure long enough to know that our lives made someone else’s life better. That is what we learned from the people who cared for us at Brearley.

We owe much of our resilience to the people who pushed us forward and helped to transform our vulnerabilities into strengths. In one survey response, my classmate shared how she vividly remembers that as a child at Brearley, she admitted to causing a problem in the class community. She described how “Mrs. Harding gathered everyone around, in the center of the classroom, and said she was so proud of [me] because [I] had had the courage to tell her the truth.” In the words of my classmate, “This story epitomizes my experience at Brearley. My teachers saw the best in me, encouraged me, were gentle and loving with me, and believed in me. They were brilliant people who knew what kids really needed to feel whole.”

Throughout the survey, people expressed how they feel prepared to rise to challenges by navigating the messiness of it all and asking the types of questions that guide them to organize tactically and deliberately—thanks to the supportive adults at Brearley.

Here are some more quotes from my classmates who:

“Loved being in a class where athletes and theater kids and those focused on academics all ran together, and were sometimes the same person.”

“Made a great set of friends . . . several of whom are still [my] closest friends.”

“My exposure to differences and the intimacy of our class prepared [my] to appreciate others and fostered an ability to forge relationships with anyone.”

“By senior year, we seemed to be on our way to understanding ourselves and appreciating our own and each other’s individuality.”

Whether we start early or late, no one can truly master anything in life or persevere without hope and a strong support network. I write these words not only for the students in my class and in other classes who felt that they could thrive at Brearley, but also for the students whose unique gifts and contributions were not outwardly acknowledged here. Often, those students found enough mastery in the world to raise ceilings for themselves and others. Their talents might not have appeared salient within these walls, but outside of these walls, they lit up and continue to light up the world in unimaginable ways. Either way, life guides us to learn. The gem of life lies not in obtaining knowledge early or late, but in learning and thinking deeply because, as one of my favorite speakers often says, “our future life is the fruit of what we think now.”

A wise person also once said that “The race is not to the swift, Nor the battle to the strong, Nor bread to the wise, Nor riches to men of understanding, Nor favor to men of skill; But time and chance happen to them all.”

This is a precious time, because when we are united, we can withstand time and chance together. What are we rushing into now if not to connect, hold the promise of new possibilities together, and watch them grow? We get to transition beyond figuring out how the world has or will define us into acknowledging and discovering our greater purposes in the world.

There are more things on our to-do list than wearing sunscreen. There are many trials to endure, but through connecting, we can face our challenges and redefine ourselves through them. Now that we are reunited, what will we choose to think? How will we establish a culture of care that helps us rise above the encroaching ceilings? In other words, how do we extend the legacy of those who believed in potential beyond what they immediately saw within these 610 walls?

I challenge you not only to juxtapose past and present today but also to use the time we have together to continue to frame ourselves within a fruitful future grounded in connection. What will we get to do now based on what we think now?

May this reunion connect us in meaningful ways that help us thrive together in hope.

1991 To HELEN KOTCHOUBEY and Ryan Lee, a daughter, Sophia Lee 1

1999 To SABRINA GEER and Bryan Gunderson, a son, James Alexander Gunderson 2

To ALICE ENGEL VARTAN and Hovig Vartan, a daughter, Angelica Thomas Vartan 3

To VIVIAN CHIN and Hugh Matthew Donnelly VI, a son, Hugh Matthew Donnelly VII 4

2000 To ALEXANDRA MACRAE CONRAD and Parker Conrad, a daughter, Lucy

To SABRINA TAMRAZ and Robert Horn, a daughter, Zahra

2004 To IMAN AHMED and Andrew Sinanoglou, a daughter, Rawiya Wilma Joyoti Sinanoglou

2007 To MELINDA KOULBALIDES REEDER and Rob Reeder, a son, Robert W. Reeder V 5

To ZOE LUBITZ and David Kohn, a daughter, Lilah Bernice Kohn 6

To CAROLINE STERN and Tom Burnett, a daughter, Leah Stern Burnett 7

2011 To HALLIE MEYER and James, a daughter, June 8

2012 To MEGAN JONES and Gregory Russell, a son, William Cope Jones Russell 9

MARRIAGES

2004 DARYL KLEIMAN to Adam Sayre

2008 SARA APPLETON to Peps Bengzon

2009 CAROLYN RUVKUN to Will Treece

2011 JENNA SANTORO to Andrew Tolman 1

NIKKI LAM to Eric Dost 2

ANAMI CHAN to Ethan Evans

2012 HELEN HANDELMAN to Aaron Ardisson

CAROLINE WEDDINGTON TUCKER to Tyler Brandt Neidermayer 3

1 2 3

IN MEMORIAM

1940 Sylvia Maynard

1940 Margaret Underwood Wright

1945 Elizabeth Debevoise Healy

1945 Katharine Place

1946 Fay Caulkins Harbach

1946 Ellen Lamy Moore

1946 Monique Lévy-Savoye Valéry

1947 Virginia Lyon Paige

1947 Penelope Stillman Wolfe

1948 Barbara Hopkinson Schurer

1949 Marguerite Stehli Kelly

1952 Alice Talcott Bennet

1953 Molly Rulon-Miller Fowler

1953 Anne Chickering Hill

1953 Jean Connelly Mooney

1958 Katie Cowles Nichols

1958 Nancy Kolker Staggs

1959 Kendall Bailey Montgomery

1962 Lee Mason

1962 Sage Tower Mumma

1962 Nora Kerz Patterson

1964 Polly Rogers

1973 Lorraine Brown

2003 Samantha Wright

Remembering Kitty Cunningham

LIBRARIAN

By Frances Taliaferro

When Kitty came to Brearley in 1962, the Upper School library was a poky place on the sixth floor. The card catalogue was made of golden oak; it stood on long legs beside the librarian’s desk. The general feeling was fusty. When Kitty left Brearley in 2000, a huge transformation had occurred. The library was on the ground floor, the first thing you saw when you came to 6l0 East 83rd Street. It was bright and comfortable, it included the whole school and it announced that from kindergarten (then known as Class B) through Class XII, enjoying the life of the mind was the most important thing here. The library communicated the Brearley-ness of Brearley. Kitty was largely responsible for this transformation.

In the olden days, librarians were not tech whizzes, as they are now. We thought of them as withered crones whose main activity was shushing, accompanied by lectures about what you should be reading. Kitty wasn’t like that at all. She met you where you were. There was nothing judgmental about her. In most other parts of the School, girls felt that they were being assessed and categorized; what a relief it was to come to the library and just be. For students, school can be a social minefield. Kitty made the library a haven. She herself was just eccentric enough to make eccentric girls feel comfortable. She didn’t ruffle easily; the only things that got her back up were unkindness and unfairness to others. If something unfortunate had happened to you, you knew it would be safe to go to the library.

Kitty was a reader of people as well as books. An astute observer of children, she could tell who was in trouble. She would always go to bat for them: outsiders, misfits, girls who listened to a different drummer, girls who were neglected by their classmates or sometimes their families. Perhaps it was her rebellious, anti-authoritarian streak that made these girls so interesting to Kitty. Her own disposition was sunny, but she knew something about the dark side and wasn’t frightened by it. She didn’t just dispense warmth and comfort; she radiated them.

Kitty’s sense of humor informed everything she did. She never lost touch with her inner 14-year-old; it’s hard for anybody to describe her without eventually using the word giggle. She was a world-class giggler. Some people’s giggles could drive you mad, but Kitty’s giggle helped keep you sane. It was mischievous, irreverent, full of appreciation of life’s absurdity. After you’d heard a bunch of Kitty’s giggles bubbling forth, you could be pretty sure that everything would be all right. And Kitty loved a running joke. Here’s an example. Libraries are supposed to be quiet places. Sometimes I would have to call her on official business. She would answer the phone: “Library.” I would assume a sepulchral library voice and say “HELLO.” Then we would burst into giggles. It was really stupid, but we always thought it was funny.

Here are some things that Kitty was not. Just for openers, she was not a fashionista; still, she made the occasional fashion statement: Her black-and-white checkerboard loafers, for instance, so clunky and in-your-face. Kitty was a force for good, but she was not a goody-goody, nor was she intellectually pretentious. Her taste in reading was eclectic; she gobbled up midlevel fiction, so she knew what would attract girls who didn’t think of themselves as readers. Kitty was deeply knowledgeable about dance, but she communicated her knowledge in an unscary way. A favorite cultural activity was The Rocky Horror Show. Kitty was not a Luddite. She was an early learner about the world of the computer—and she wasn’t frightened of that, either. It’s not an exaggeration to say that she made the Brearley library ready for the 21st century. Or that she embodied the qualities the School stood for: Whatsoever things are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report. Think on these things.

On the river, on East 83rd Street, we

Create a legacy for Brearley.

Incubator, proving ground, home. Brearley is a singular place that is all about the girls—who they are, what they are capable of, and who they can become.

When you include Brearley in your estate plans, you join a generous group of supporters who safeguard the Brearley experience for the girls of future generations.

For sample language to use in your will or trust, and further information, please contact: Phoebe T. Geer ’97, Director of Advancement, (212) 570-8609 or pgeer@brearley.org.