19 minute read
American Muslims
SARA ABBASI: It’s my pleasure to introduce our distinguished speaker, Daisy Khan. Daisy is founder of the Women’s Islamic Initiative in Spirituality and Equality, known as WISE. She is co-founder and former executive director of the American Society of Muslim Advancement [ASMA], author of Born with Wings, and executive editor of WISE Up: Knowledge Ends Extremism. Daisy plans to follow Born with Wings with two forthcoming books, 30 Rights of Muslim Women, and WISE Up: White Supremacy.
Today we’ll have an important conversation with Daisy about Islam and the advancement of Muslim women. Welcome, Daisy. It’s wonderful to see you. DAISY KHAN: Thank you very much, Sara, for having me and I also want to thank all those people at Commonwealth who are behind the scenes, who have made this program possible. ABBASI: I recently finished reading your book, Born with Wings, and I think everyone should get a copy. It is so well-written, full of wonderful
DAISY KHAN HAS DEVOTED MUCH OF HER
life to fighting Islamophobia, increasing public understanding of Islam and breaking down barriers between Muslims and other faiths. She has also worked to modernize the role of women within Islam. Khan’s awards and honors include the Eleanor Roosevelt Human Rights Award, Edinburgh Peace Award, and the Interfaith Center’s Award for Promoting Peace. She’s been listed among Time magazine’s 100 Most Influential People and was ranked among the “Top Ten Women Faith leaders” by The Huffington Post. From the June 16, 2021, online program “Islamic Activist Daisy Khan with Sara Abbasi: Understanding Modern Muslim Women.” Photo by Voice of AmericaDAISY KHAN, Founder, Women’s Islamic Initiative in Spirituality and Equality (WISE); Co-Founder & Former Executive Director, American Society of Muslim Advancement (ASMA); Author, Born With Wings In Conversation with SARA ABBASI, Philanthropist; Provider of Endowment, Sohaib and Sara Abbasi Program in Islamic Studies, Stanford University
Daisy Khan
anecdotes and told with just such a great sense of humor. What prompted you to write a book about your life? KHAN: I decided to set the record straight about Muslim women and who they were by publishing a book titled, 100 Heroines of Islam. I met two literary agents who examined these photos and found the kaleidoscope of women’s faces truly striking. They loved it.
Then they said, “There’s a problem, the market for illustrated books is gone, nobody does coffee table books anymore.” Then, they asked me about my work with these women. As I spoke about my passion for women’s rights and the work I was undertaking around the world, their interest was piqued. So, they asked me, had I written a book about my life? And I said, “I cannot imagine why anyone would want to read such a book.”
They looked at each other, smiled, and then said, “We would.” So, the memoir was born. I wrote it so people could have a cup of tea with me while I give people a nuanced picture of Islam, of Muslims, which is currently, arguably, the most misunderstood and misrepresented faith on our planet today. ABBASI: Could you tell us about the title of the book, Born with Wings? Is there a story behind why you chose that particular title? KHAN: Rumi, the 13th century Muslim theologian, has a poem in which he says, “You are born with wings, so why crawl through life?” For me, this is a metaphor for the human condition. We’re all born equal with dignity and inherent capabilities to realize our potential as a human being or to reach great heights, but external circumstances somehow prevent us from doing so.
In order for us to achieve these great heights, we must discover our purpose. Why are we here? And what am I supposed to do? And then what is my talent that will make me flourish or achieve my goal? So, this is why, in the book, I share my own journey of self-discovery as well. ABBASI: You talk about learning about religion and religious teachings more from your grandparents, from Moji and Dadaji, while you were growing up in Kashmir and just their life examples with some of the things they did around the community. Could you share specific examples of how they imparted Islam or religious teachings to you as a child? KHAN: We lived in an extended family in a very large home. There were about 16 children in our house at one time, and everyone together, we were like the von Trapps. They sent in a religious tutor, who was brought in to teach us how to read and write the Quran.
And just like the von Trapps, we made this guy’s life miserable. One cousin pulled a knife on him. Another one put a mouse under his chair, and he fled like his pants were on fire. We all cheered on, not realizing how detrimental this was going to be for us long term. I mean, today, I don’t know how to read the Arabic the way I should.
So there was no formal education, because no imam would ever come to our house again, because the word was out that this is a terrible family. We basically watched our elders put the Quran into action. And there’s a verse in the Quran that says, “No compulsion in religion.” So there was no compelling, no doctrine passed on to us.
It was religion by emulation. When giving charity, our grandfather would show us how charity must be given by the right hand, so the left hand does not know. ABBASI: You gave your first official talk on Islam to your high school class when you were 16. Do you think that particular experience of presenting on Islam and looking at Islam in a completely different way, set the stage for your role as a spokesperson for Islam? KHAN: Yeah. I mean, for a social studies teacher, I was a true specimen. I mean, he loved the fact that there was somebody from over East. He inquired if I was Muslim, and when I replied, he asked me if I could tell the class about Islam. I mean, how many 16-year-olds know anything about Islam? We are talking pre-Google, pre-internet. I told him I had no idea what to say, but he was persistent. Why don’t I study up and come prepared for the class, he said. Then there was something that was ironic. The same thing had happened to my grandfather when he was at Harvard, he had been asked to do a presentation, and he discovered Islam in the library at Harvard, which was a very extensive library. Fortunately, his love of Islam resulted in him writing a book called The Kashmiri Muslim, which was an excellent resource for me.
So I lifted the whole section of the five pillars of Islam and the beliefs of Muslims and the basic tenets. And here I was standing in front of the class, talking about the basic tenets of Islam to, largely, Jewish kids who knew little about their own religion, much less mine. At first, I was nervous, but as I was speaking, I felt as if a switch had been flipped inside me. Basic as it was, my little talk gave me a sense and control of leadership. Once again, I found myself at the podium and my classmates were intrigued, not so much about Islam, it seemed, but about my life. I was no longer the odd kid out, the girl people were pointing to, as I was now part of the conversation.
My 16-year-old self was guided by a path paved by my grandfather and his cherished books. I realize now that the power of the family model increased me in knowledge, was actually going to become my set of wings that I would lean on throughout my life. Decades after my presentation to Mr. Green’s classroom, he and my school community would rise to defend me during the Ground Zero mosque controversy, which I was part of. I was one of the people that proposed it.
I had to wonder if I had not shared my beliefs with my teachers and my fellow students when I was in high school, would they have had the exposure that ultimately led them to understand and support me when so many people were rising to judgment? At that point, I thought I was just representing myself, but something inside of me made me realize that I was going to be an ambassador. This is a role many Muslims play today. I know Muslims that have the same story, how they were asked to rise up and speak for people and speak for the community. This has given rise to many Muslims who are civically engaged, who are running for politics, who are public speakers. So, this is just not my story, it’s a story of Muslims in general. ABBASI: In your book, you highlight the fact that the prophet abolished female infanticide, he established women’s rights of inheritance, of property, of divorce. What was the most surprising part of that research, when you did that research in New York many years later? KHAN: The more I delve into the Quran, the more I realize how much human equality is central to our faith. I’m not just talking about men’s and women’s equality, but really human equality in terms of the Quran saying, “I have created you nations and tribes, so you may get to know one another.”
This diversity that we talk about, the “diversity and inclusion”, which is a corporate term, is actually a divine plan. So, for me, that is exciting, because that’s the worldview that I was raised in.
In Islam, we believe that all humans are stewards of God. We’ve been given a piece of divinity, a divine charge, so to speak, to act God-like. I, as a woman, have that same charge. It’s not just a charge on men, it’s a woman’s charge as well. So, I realized, “Oh my God, I have a big responsibility.” I was able to stand taller and bigger, because now I was discharging something that God required me to do. That really opened my pathway to taking my activism very seriously, because it’s a tall order. ABBASI: Was that charge the motivation behind the launch of ASMA? Tell us more about ASMA, what the organization is and what it does. KHAN: I started ASMA in 1997, primarily to focus on how to create an American expression of Islam. Not American Islam, but an American expression; it has to do with how you conduct weddings, how you do your birthrights, which is uniquely different in every country, because we are products of our cultures and our customs. I stepped down from that organization to primarily start and focus on WISE, but the organization was created to build bridges between faith communities and to foster an AmericanMuslim identity for the next generation. ABBASI: In your book, there’s a powerful moment that talk about in your life, that took place after you gave a talk on Islam after 9/11. You were asked a question by an audience member that prompted you to quit your job in corporate America. Can you tell us what that question was and what you decided to do? KHAN: I had a corporate job, I was a fulltime architectural designer. I did work in the World Trade Center towers for about three years. I was on the 106th floor, which is one of the top-most floors. I was not there during 9/11, I was there before 9/11. So, after 9/11, I was kind of the tag-along person trying to help Imam Feisal, who was doing all his speeches. I accidentally double-booked him for a synagogue and a church. He said, “Well, we can’t disappoint either, why don’t you go to the church and I’ll go to the synagogue?” I said, “Well, I don’t know how to speak.” I mean, I could do presentations, but I’d never done public speaking on religious issues.
He said, “Oh, you’ve heard me speak a thousand times. Just repeat what I say.” So, with that, I went to this little church in Princeton and just like the same frequently asked questions came up and, like a parrot,
Sara Abbasi
I repeated everything. Then, this little old lady, bless her heart, she must’ve been in her late 80s, with white hair, she asked me the question about women in Islam. I said, “Women have been granted the right to divorce, to own property, to inheritance,” and all the things that people do not know about.
She looked at me and she said, “I believe you, dear, but can you tell me why women in Afghanistan are being stoned to death?” Because that was the image that was circulating around, where a woman was shot in a soccer field while the men were cheering on. That image was very traumatic, because, as a Muslim woman, I felt like I couldn’t do anything. I was living so far away. I didn’t have a specific wherewithal, what can I do?
Then, she asked me that next profound question, the life-altering question. She said, “Well, dear, just tell me, what are you doing about it?” And that, “What are you doing about it?” Really stayed with me. As I drove home, I wondered why I was giving my time to corporate America. I could be replaced in two seconds in corporate America, but my community needed me. My community needed my skill, because I was very skilled at developing things and creating things.
I had a lot of skill, energy, and motivation. I was passionate about my faith and I had gone through a whole spiritual journey. I quit cold turkey, my paycheck and everything. I dedicated myself full-time to community development, not knowing what shape it was going to take. I was just ready for whatever was coming my way. ABBASI: In your book, you said you were inspired by how the suffragettes had used faith-based arguments to fight for women’s rights, and you’re doing something similar with WISE. Can you tell us about that and the impact that it’s had on the community? KHAN: I discovered the suffragettes, and then I discovered that there are actually pre-suffragettes in my own faith. So it was interesting. Devout Christian women, Black and white together, driven by their faith in a just God, that not only challenged inequality against women but also the practice of slavery itself.
They wrote the statement at this first antislavery convention that reads as follows, that really had a profound effect on me. It says, “The time has come for women to move in the sphere which God has assigned her, and no longer remain satisfied with the limits of corrupt custom and perverse application of Scripture that has encircled her.” I thought at that time when I read that, and I said, “Oh my God, I could write the same exact statement for the women in my community and what they’re going through.”
I established WISE as a faith-based movement to transform the position of women from within the Islamic faith and its tradition, because it’s there already. We do this by collaborating together as women and supporting the work of Muslim women leaders worldwide. We started this in 2006, we brought 200 amazing Muslim women scholars, activists, artists, religious, and civil society leaders, who joined together to develop a holistic vision for improving the position of Muslim women around the world.
We’ve had global conferences, we’ve got seven evidence-based position papers. We have the largest database of 600 influential Muslim women from the earliest of time to today on our website. ABBASI: There’s another book that you are coming out with, the book on women’s rights in Islam. Can you tell us a little bit about that book? KHAN: I’m publishing this book called 30 Rights of Muslim Women, which is a complete overview of women’s rights in Islam with clear chronic and historical support, to disentangle the universal tenets of Islam from the varying customs that prevent women from having these rights. A lot of times it’s the nexus of custom versus religion or custom trumping religion, that is the issue.
Through these 30 rights, we hope to improve the lives of Muslim women by connecting them to their deeply held beliefs and giving them the powerful tool to aid their agency, so they can work in their own communities. It’s also intended as a formal charge to governments and religious leaders
Feisal Abdul Rauf was born in Kuwait in 1948 and emigrated to the United States in the 1960s with his father, Imam Muhammad Abdul Rauf. After earning degrees in nuclear engineering and plasma physics, he turned his focus toward religion and founded the American Society for Muslim Advancement in 1997. He has written five books on Islam, including a children’s version of the Quran. From 1983 to 2009, Rauf was the imam (leader of prayer) for Masjid al-Farah in New York City’s Tribeca district. He married Islamic activist Daisy Khan in the late 90s, and has advocated for the equality of women within Islam.
Following the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks, Rauf spoke at chuches and mosques all over New York City, provided cultural training to the Federal Bureau of Investigation, and worked in the Bush and Obama administrations on outreach tours to foster better relationships between Islam and the West. His work centers the cultural ties between the foundations of Islam and the concept of American religious pluralism.
His plans for a 13-story interfaith community center two blocks away from where the Twin Towers once stood were criticized by conservatives, including a pastor from Florida who threatened to burn just over 2,900 copies of the Quran if the building was completed. In a 2012 interview, Rauf told NPR’s Terry Gross, “There are moderates in Israel, there are moderates in Iran, there are moderates in the Republican Party, moderates in the Democratic Party. What we need to do is link all of these moderates together and to figure out a way by which this particular coalition can speak to important issues to marginalize the voice of the extremists.”
—Corey Rose
to protect and uphold the Islamic rights of Muslim women, especially in those countries that want to call themselves Islamic. The Islamic Republic of Afghanistan has no right to strip women of their Islamic rights. They can call themselves Islamic, they can call themselves the Republic of Taliban, but they can’t call themselves Islamic Republic of Afghanistan if they’re going to deny the rights that women have received in seventh century Arabia. ABBASI: What are the greatest misperceptions that you think non-Muslims have about Islam? What can the media do to correct these misperceptions? KHAN: So, the most common misperception is that somehow Islam is linked to terrorism or Islam is inherently violent. This is a gross mischaracterization of Islam. It is completely false, it is wrong. It would be like saying all white supremacists are all somehow based in Christian thought. ISIS and other groups exploit and weaponize Islam to meet their political goals, just like the white supremacists are weaponizing Christianity right now.
Islam, the religion that we practice, has to be de-linked from the activity of the terrorists or what the terrorists do. They’re terrorists, Islam is a religion.
The second one is that somehow women are second class citizens or don’t have the same rights. It’s just not true. The third one, which is more of a political issue, is that Muslims are not capable of democracy, and that they are only interested in theocracies. There are many Muslim nations that are democratic nations There are other [misperceptions], but I just mentioned the top three or four. ABBASI: What’s the greatest challenge facing Muslim women, both in and outside of the religion? KHAN: The greatest challenge I believe is that Muslim women themselves don’t know their own rights, so they don’t know how to fight for their rights. It’s my hope that after this book comes out, that women will have the information that they need at their fingertips, so they can fight for their rights. But that’s from within the faith. Externally, I am also hoping that the book can serve as a tool for our allies who don’t know, don’t understand when they are confronted with these false narratives about Muslim women, that they will also have that information at their fingertips.
We’ve written the book in such a way that . . . they are key takeaways. All your key takeaways are really easy for you to take away that key thing and say, “That’s just not true,” because we Muslims have written it and we’ve done a lot of research, so everything is supported. It’s external, but it’s internal, and internally we have to educate ourselves. That’s very important. ABBASI: A question from the audience is, “The hate crimes are on the rise. What can be done to reduce them against Muslims and all groups that have been targeted?” KHAN: I think that Americans are not aware that the majority of us who are confronted by hate crimes directly, like the Jewish community, the Muslim community, the African-American community, the Asian community know these statistics, but majority of Americans don’t. In fact, they don’t even know what’s going on. They just discovered white supremacy existed while all of us were confronted by white supremacists for a long time.
Now there is a national awareness that there is a real threat from within. That is why I think it’s important for every American now to learn this information and to bring these facts to bear. ABBASI: What an incredible journey you’ve had so far. What is next for you? KHAN: Well, I think that the red boxing gloves are out, because we have a lot of work to do on many fronts. My work is no longer just the work I’m doing with women around the world. My work is here in the homeland too, because if this homeland comes apart, and we have seen this in the last four years of what it did to the world when America comes apart, the world comes apart. So, we have to keep our home base safe, and we have to create peace in this country.
Then, we also have to, in tandem, work with other nations, because there are so many people looking to connect with one another to create a different way of doing things.
So, my plate is full, but I’m always open to anything else that somebody throws my way. I believe that from my own spiritual tradition, I think that I’m just a container. And if God wants to send something my way and make space in my life for that, I will accept that.
I don’t have any real grand plans. I just go along with what I think is necessary at that moment and what I think my new charge is. And that comes, it shows up. It has a way of showing up.
