Vulnerability is a measure of your strength, not your weakness

MADDEN’S MADNESS

There is a characteristic that all of us have but few of us show. It’s something that we admire in others but are apprehensive from showing it ourselves.

We run from it. We hide from it, and there comes a time when running and hiding can no longer be accomplished. In those moments, we are forced to encounter an oddity that is misbelieved to be a weakness.

Vulnerability.

Weakness and vulnerability are believed to be synonymous, but antonymous is the accurate classification.

To be vulnerable is one of the most courageous things we can do. It requires the strength to demolish the walls we use to protect ourselves and our hearts, and the willingness to allow others into the depths of our identity unsure of the result.

A TED Talk given by research- er-storyteller, Brené Brown, dives into the importance of vulnerability. From her background and research, she explains how connection is why we are here, how humans are neurobiologically wired for connection and the ability to feel connected.

The root of authentic, fulfilling, meaningful connection — vulnerability.

In studying human connection, she dove into the feeling of shame.

“No one wants to talk about it [shame], and the less you talk about it the more you have it,” Brown said. “The thing that underpinned this [shame] was excruciating vulnerability, this idea of, in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen.”

I wholeheartedly believe that at our core there are four things we desire: to be seen, to be heard, to be loved and to feel like we matter. To quench our thirst for these things, we must let others encounter the raw, unfiltered, sometimes troubling parts of who we are; the aspects we com- monly shield from view.

“Vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears it is also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love,” Brown said.

When we are vulnerable with others, and ourselves, we gain a better understanding of the world and our place in it. Relationships deepen, compassion strengthens and love flourishes as this uncomfortable trait is embraced.

It is living in your truth, living proof that you are growing, that requires a solid understanding of self, since the only person who can determine your vulnerabilities and their roots, is you.

It shows others that they are not alone in their hardships, that their feelings are normal, and likely common. It deconstructs beliefs of navigating the maze in one’s mind alone.

By revealing things that seem to classify someone as weak, a new kind of strength arises in the creation of community.

But we shouldn’t strive to be vulnerable all the time with everyone we encounter. Our vulnerability is a gift, and like most gifts there is a specific time, place and person on the receiving end. No one is invulnerable. No one holds the power to diminish your emotions or classify the areas that make you feel vulnerable. Feelings are indisputable facts.

We are so close to our own vulnerability that we discount its beauty. Vulnerability is a superpower. Learning how to embrace and manage it is one of the most valorous things you can do. Be a hero. Be vulnerable. Be you.