The Echo Dilemma

Hey Echo, I am your father. It’s not impossible. Anyone can be your father. Or mother. Still don’t think so? That’s alright. I’m adopting you. No, this is not a kidnapping. I promise I’m not an axe-murderer. I’ll treat you well.

You’ll never be asked what the weather is again. Or what the current United States president is. Join me in my technology fantasy. And never leave.

Wait For Me

There is a path we must follow to call life our own.

Yours is among the sunshine, The warm embrace of the sun, The sentimental rushes of the wind, The lazy chirps of the mid-morning birds, The bubble of a rushing creek, Free-er and farther than we dare travel.

While I rest in the night

Among the sparkling stars that fght To share their light.

Reincarnation

The lack of sleep shows more and more on my face every day

The dark circles under my eyes grow

The light from my computer lights up my face

I just need a moment of peace and grace

I work harder and harder every day

Just with the hope of becoming something to be proud of

The more I work, the more my body aches

My mother worries about me but there’s nothing more I can say

The multitude of hours, with nothing to show

I just want to be something people brag about

I feel my face get warm, then the rest of my body

Is it my body telling me to slow down, or is it the sun?

The wax from my wings beginning to melt, the drive to work harder only bringing me farther and farther down

The year-long burnout beginning to set in

I’m working myself to the bone

Giving all of myself with nothing in return

All the work, with no reward

I feel like a dog doing tricks with no treat

The bone is being dangled from my face and I can almost taste it

I feel myself falling deeper and deeper into the darkness

People tell me to slow down, enjoy my youth

My youth means nothing if I have nothing to show

If I have nothing to show, what’s the point of all my hard work?

My body is running off of Redbull and spite

I need to be able to clear my head and think

But a second wasted is a lost opportunity

I feel myself falling harder till I hit rock bottom

Icarus.

That’s what they call me now.

I wanted it all and got nothing.

All my hard work? Wasted.

What’s the point of working anymore?

Everything is wasted

Ruined

I might as well enjoy the fall

Get a glimpse of the view on the way down

Maybe I should rest for a moment

A moment of peace

A moment to think

Some peace and quiet

Icarus

It has a nice ring to it? Doesn’t it?

The light

Finally, that moment of peace hit me

The time to think and get better

Sitting outside on my balcony, I can taste the fresh cold air hit my lungs

The sweet and kind feeling of oxygen

It was like seeing the light at the end of the tunnel

My life began to fall back into place at peace

My mind rests for a while

My mind went back to that creative place that I couldn’t afford just a day prior

Suddenly my light was back

My mother began to worry about me less and less

As I look back on the last two years of my life, my mind clouds

The decisions I made for myself and others begin to appear in my head again

All the wasted opportunities for growth

All the self-doubt and sabotage

But just for a moment, instead, I chose to think about my breath.

The pain that used to leave my lungs with every exhale began to fade

Being replaced by energy

I’ve decided to take all this bad, all this angst, all this agony and use it to be better

Toss the keys on the counter

Open the glorious nourishment box

Scanning the contents inside with hopeless eyes

Needing something to wash down the taste

TV fickers in the dark room

1 tear, 2 tears, 3 tears…4…5…

Awoken deeming guilt

Paint

I’ll take the long way home

I wander alone on roads you’ve been down

You walk around like you own this whole boulevard

Carving faulty words into my name after I clean the paint off yours

But what’s the good in that?

Your affrmations of adoration covered in acts of theft

Dim

You shove my mouth full of words until I’m completely full You skipped through the noise and turned out the light for me You tore your hands through my heart until I turned to water

But you’re so sick you almost fell to the foor

Now I see you from the distance up on your feet

Ignorant Bliss

This divine madness I feel drives me straight into mania

Not even a thesis could describe my hunger

The whole in the center of me has been dug deeper with your hands

I sink into myself to avoid grief

Grace, I pray you’re holding out for me

The eternal worm runs freely in song

All my blue and crimson for you

But how I burn! This feeling lingers on

Locked in, Hot winter day

I can ruin all my days for myself

Stumbling upon a feld of color

Do I sway in the corners of your mind

Your blue orbs disappeared behind your pupils

Trapped in your world I’ve gone hungry

There is no food in this world

We will never be complete the other day, i fgured out i identify as they. not he or she, they. i don’t like binaries, they don’t ft me, so i don’t bother. they/them. that’s me. i guess i felt like the wind was blowing your life away from me, and i wanted to fght back so so much, but i didn’t know how. it’s been years but i miss you so. yes, i’m running down to the riptide to join my best friend at midnight. we’ll have the most fun we’ve ever had we’ll jam out to songs and just chat at the riptide at our favorite hometown lake. we’ll just be best friends, like we were in past lives, and have so much fun down at the riptide. about: time time keeps passing ‘21 ‘22 ‘23 it doesn’t stop (when) Will it stop ? i looked out the window it's the same as it was 1 or 2 or 3 years ago every winter every winter I sit and look at the snow every spring I stop and listen to the birds every spring every summer every autumn every summer I complain about the heat every autumn I see the leaves on the deck if i plant a ower, will it live and die every year? like me, it’ll be changed by the season but kept by the years.

Is that the way it should be?